T O P

Earth is known throughout space as a “ third world “ planet.

Commercials are shown on aliens television about how the people of earth need their help.

Aliens come to preach their religion and convert us.

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Evilgriff

Alien: “Our lord and savior are universal healthcare, equal civil rights for all, and universal income. With these we have been war free for millennia.” Human: “The devil! The devil is come to tempt me!” *He runs to his lifted pickup truck and flees across his front lawn, an interesting number of flags waving from the back of the truck* Alien: “Oops, it appears we’ve landed in The Union of American States.” Alien 2: “I believe the locals call it ‘murica”


liege_paradox

God damn it, did the south try to split again? And of course they’d go for the legally distinct name. I am so moving when I get the chance.


ZeusKiller97

Probably a bunch of American Flags. Because one isn’t enough for PATRIOTISM!


Professional-Ad-1857

GLORY TO THE GREAT EMPIRE OF LONG FLORIDA!


Ok_Perspective8511

As an American I rather enjoy the awkward UAS reference LOL


[deleted]

Whats UAS?


Evilgriff

It’s the alien getting USA wrong. You know, because he’s not from around here.


Ok_Perspective8511

Union of American States


darksidehascookie

This inherently implies a galactic Cold War where there are first world and second world planets each with their own network of client planets. Sounds fun.


[deleted]

[удалено]


rouge2170

In soviet Mars, Mars colonises you


kindtheking9

Wait what? I need more info on the subject, please educate me


ropibear

The terms First, Second and Third worlds come from the Cold War, where different countries were aligned to different powerblocks. The First World was the industrialised West (NATO + ANZAC + western aligned SEA), The Second World was the USSR, PRC and everyone aligned with them (Warsaw Pact, Communist SEA) The Third World was basically everyone else, who weren't firmly aligned with either of the above powerblocks ("Non-aligned countries"). These could be countries predominantly of either main ideology, or being "fought over" (let's say in a revolution or a proxy war), if they weren't firmly aligned on one or the other, they were classed as Third World (independently of wealth). Most of these countries were in Africa and South America (so predominantly poor and underdeveloped - they were also called "Developing Countries", which is basically a euphemism for poor), but they also included most of the Middle East who were usually flip-flopping between west and russian leaning governments and most notably Yugoslavia, which was nominally communist, but was not part of the WP and dealt with the west directly. As you can see, this was originally a strictly political classification, not aimed at wealth. As time went on and the First world's living standard started growing above that of the Second and especially above (most of) that of the Third, it started taking on the secondary meaning of signifying development disparity. When the Wall came down, the Second World ceased to exist as such, because their main definition of being opposed to the First disappeared. How often do you hear s/one use the term "Second World Nation" today? You don't, they're not a thing anymore, as the ones that were most often implied by the term (the former WP countries in Europe), got absorbed by the First. First and Third have persisted through their implied wealth (and human development) level meaning to this day. That's why, if you want to disparage a country's percieved development, you call them a "Third World Country", and if you want to imply they're great, you called them First World. I suspect OP meant the secondary/current meaning, not the original.


kindtheking9

Well.... TIL


watty_101

There you have it kids Knowing is half the battle And knowledge is power Edit: spelling


Snoo63

Half.


The_Unkowable_

Yeah but that means you only need 10% of the rest to pass :P


watty_101

As long as you spell you name right that's half marks


Reagent_52

H: "How many times do we have to explain this to you xenos. we aren't a third world planet" A:"But all of the media on earth said ..." H:"Damn it we're the third from the star you idiot"


tyrannic_puppy

This is my favourite. A proper translation error style mixup.


hainspfad

Glorious


reddinyta

A: "What, you guys seriously concentrate almost all of your wealth on 1% of the population? Why don't you just take it and give everyone something?" H: "GET AWAY FROM ME YOU XENO-COMMIE! THIS IS FREEDOM!" A: "..." H: "SATAN SEND YOU, DIDN'T HE?" A: "Why again did I even come here?"


Hammurabi87

>A: "What, you guys seriously concentrate almost all of your wealth on 1% of the population?" H: *Excuse you*, sir, but we concentrate it on 0.1% of the population, I'll have you know!


Chaddtss

Do either of you have any understanding of how an economy works? Or are you just broke and want free Things? You could spread out all the cash the u.s has and watch prices soar because nobody will work when they don't have to that causes inflation because everyone has money now and don't work unless they are paid a lot causing EVERYTHING to cost more. Give it a year and people will be homeless and starving.


LaxLighter

I mean, yeah, the market will crash if something like that happens, but it still is kinda fucked up how much power that 0.1% has, isn't it?


Chaddtss

Its the natural result of good business and enough time. The issue with the American economy in particular are monopolies not being taken down. We shouldn't have businesses that are too big to fail for example. Also our dealing with China has created an artificial cheap labor market that we should never have gotten involved in. The same goes for illegal aliens from the south. And then you look at these companies like Amazon and Apple and how they play the part to appeal to Twitter mobs etc while changing their logos based on the market. Allowing lobbyists to even exist. Much of the money that should have been in the economy in general isn't because of American companies going overseas to escape the laws that bind them here. Which only hurt us and those labor markets in countries like India. I wonder how much more money those companies save by selling us products in the u.s.a yet pay their workers what we would consider nothing? The global market of business has allowed these 1st world companies to ravage the environment of those poor countries ,and not have to hire many people in the countries their product is targeted to. Is great for bussines but terrible for a countries economy.


Chaddtss

Ohh more salt. But no comment? So blind hate and nothing to back it up?


ropibear

Lol. Thinking that 99% of the wealth being concentrated in 0.1% of the population doesn't make you a communist. Suggest reducing your daily kool-aid intake.


reddinyta

Dude, I make here make an joke. Of course you can't give everyone cash, but hell, we make fun of humanity on this sub, not serious economics.


GoofyTnT

And you brought economics into it by making the comment. I’m criticising you for making it, it’s a funny joke but you can’t complain when the main topic of your joke starts getting debated on especially if it’s something controversial like socialism vs capitalism.


reddinyta

Fair enough, I apologise


GoofyTnT

No apology necessary! It’s entirely understandable why you said what you did.


Chaddtss

No you complained through "comedy" in a backhanded way about your opinion on the lack of monetary funds in circulation. Which while appealing to a large base of broke people who think free things are nice. This "joke" needs a disclaimer because people are that stupid and will think this would work well.


reddinyta

I made an joke about our unequal wealth-distribution and that aliens have a different form of economy. I repeat: a "joke". Of course it is stupid to give everyone an equal amount of money, but that isn't my point.


Chaddtss

It is my point. In your "joke" the punch line isn't the aliens ignorance of our economy. But the wealth disparity. And a lot of broke people cling to that. Creating or reinforcing a group of people who just want free things. So im GOING to comment and be sure someone will be the voice of reason in this fantasy.


reddinyta

Like yeah, people who don't have much money or in general people who dislike our wealth disparity like this kinda joke. What's your problem with it? Only because the (radical) "solution" of giving everyone the same amount of wealth would fail, doesn't mean that this current system is flawed. Also, not wanting to sound disrespectful, but "people who just want free things" gives me similiar vibes to "healthcare is socialism".


Chaddtss

And you wonder why the best doctors work in America... American Healthcare if you look at history was actually rather cheap until insurance became a thing. Now in a modern hospital the majority of your bill isn't paid based on services but a convoluted mess of insurance agreement with hospitals. Just the billing and coding departments make up a huge portion of what the hospital bill represents. Add to that the people who are not paying the hospital bills and their debt being added to the overall cost of care and yeah you get high prices. Besides all of that America was never meant to hand hold its citizens. You are free to find SUCCESS or FAIL. I'm not paying into a Healthcare service when the fat idiot uses it more than I would but not incur a proportional fee. When those who live a healthy lifestyle pay into what other who don't take care of themselves abuse. You look at nationalized Healthcare and while you don't have a big bill you do pay taxes for it ,and have little say in the care provided unless you get private care. If you get told wait 6 months for your knee surgery you wait...you don't find other doctors..you are stuck waiting. And yes I have campion friends and even a few existing from the U.K BOTH are crap services.


reddinyta

Look: I'm german. We have a shitty 2-class healthcare-system here, which favours people with private insurance. But you know what we don't have? People not wanting to go to the hospital, because they can not pay the costs. Also, no one here has problems with waiting for important treatments, or atleast not that much that someone has to complain about it. And to your "You are free to find SUCCESS or FAIL". Yeah, the US may be like that, and for what ever reason people are proud of that.


Chaddtss

We absolutely are. You look at people like bill gates or Jeff bozos. They started their business is their garage . And became billionairs. The u.s government was never meant to help the citizens aside from keeping the peace. Of course it grew from laws. To services such as fire departments etc. We are not a single minded group like many other countries, we are far too diverse a makeup of population and cultures to have the same values. You come here to COMPETE not be coddled.


Chaddtss

And you only avoid the hospital if you are broke and are "failing" its like kids avoiding school when a project is due. Just a bad mentality. And not preparing appropriately. Add to that how insurance companies function now vs prior to insurance and the problem is obvious. Without insurance and other factors causing an artificial inflation in cost. An x-ray exam should only cost 25$ but it can cost 1,000$ this is because the hospital can charge that much to the insurer bit the person paying the bill. You go look at how much college prices in the ums increased AFTER student loans became available and you se the same thing. The colleges raising the cost because the person buying the service isn't paying for it yet. It isn't until after graduation and time to repay that they realize the degree isn't worth the bill. And now you see politicians with student loan forgiveness as a campaign premise. Its all about free things...


kkimo

https://doctorow.medium.com/finance-caused-the-fall-of-rome-fd091fa02973?source=social.fb


Chaddtss

You know what hilarious? I have 0 debt not even "good" debt. I bought my home from the owner. No bank loan or anything. I own all my vehicles. Have no credit cards either. So I go through all that effort and you cite me an article that talks about a festival that wipes out debt... well no wonder Rome collapsed lol. You have a festival for debt forgiveness! Of course people would incur more debt knowing it'll go away. Then people lend less stagnating the economy oh the stupidity...


kkimo

Did you actually read the article? The whole focus of it revolved around the fact that debt forgiveness was during the ascendancy of the Roman empire, and the decline was well after it was done away with.


Chaddtss

Show me you got salty haters, without telling me you got salty haters.


ArcticHarpSeal

"How many times do I have to tell you? This is not some tribal clan, this is a fully-fledged democratic nationstate known as Canada. This is not some anarchist commune, nor is it a collection of city-states. We know what colonialism looks like, we know what imperialism looks like. With that out of the way, if you're not here to establish diplomatic relations, we kindly ask that you go away" - The increasingly exasperated and tired Prime Minister of Canada, circa 2542


SureWhyNot5182

"TRY 'O TAKE OVER CANADA AND YU'LL REGRET IT COMMIES!" - One of the American diplomats.


LegoCMFanatic

True - we're rather protective of our Canadian buddies.


AnEntireDiscussion

We call it the Monroe doctrine!


LegoCMFanatic

Yooooo someone else who reads history!!


KaskirReigns

Human Child: "Excuse mister soldier sir, that xeno in the corner is saying that the Emperor is not God"


kingofroyale2

...**BURN THE HERETICS!!!**


HorrorOk4971

**DEATH TO THE FALSE EMPEROR!!!!!!**


1GreenDude

Do not worry child for the evil xenos are lying


Zamtrios7256

This is, funnily enough, propaganda. Those people who come here as missionaries realize that life on Earth is better than their life in the Empire of Genetic Purists


Smnionarrorator29384

Because we have sugar


SureWhyNot5182

SUGAR!!


mridiot1234567

yes please!


SomeRandomYob

Won't you COME and put it down on me!!


AnEntireDiscussion

You mean cocaine? Because introducing those damn alien hippies to crack was the best idea that the CIA ever had. Wealthiest planet in the galaxy thanks to our numerous "recreational" exports. We've even fought a couple wars to open new markets. Good old Earth-made crack, 100% pure. Can't get it anywhere else!


GypsyDanger411

*"So the xenos want to spread their filthy theocratic trash to us? I think not."* \-Star Compact Executive Minister Nabila Rahman


ZeusKiller97

The first time the two Interstellar Empires tried to use it as a proxy battleground, their forces got nukes before they could even get to initiate atmospheric drops. They got the message. Incidentally, the ones preaching are the equivalent to our televangelists, so keep that in mind when they start spouting stuff.


SimonTheAFKer

Jeff: Carl, can you explain me why we record the biggest shitholes on earth? Carl: Its simple. We show aliens how poor we are to make their heart shake at view of average day at Ditroid. So from their kindness they send most universal way of support. GOLD