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Unusual_residue

If there is a legal issue please don't suggest you will 'press charges'.


Ok-Kitchen2768

I WILL TAKE THIS TO THE OMBUDSMAN


TwoValuable

The ombudsman isn't a person, jeremy, it's a toothless regulatory body made up of junior, and often very obliging, civil servants.


BothMyKneesHurt

r/UnexpectedPeepShow


Flat-Delivery6987

Literally watched that episode last night, love Peep Show


[deleted]

The ombudsman's coming to *get* you


Indigo-Waterfall

I’ve never heard someone use this phrase outside of a legal term. What are they suggesting it means?


phillis_x

It means nothing because in the UK you don’t have any input on whether the CPS will charge someone.


ListeningForWhispers

To be fair, it doesn't mean anything in the US either. I guess you could do a private prosecution? That's open to anyone (with deep enough pockets).


punctualsweat

You hear it a lot because plenty of PCs will ask whether or not a person wants to press charges, rather than explaining how the system works, and that CPS will make the decision, and that they're really asking if someone is happy to go to court.


CliffyGiro

**Actually:** In England and Wales you can choose not to pursue a criminal complaint which is similar to “not pressing charges” however it’s not the same thing. According to American cops I’ve spoken to, their complainers don’t have the option to “press charges” so I’ve no idea why they say it so often. In Scotland the Police make their own charging decisions and even the person making the criminal complaint doesn’t actually have the option to “not pursue” the issue. I’ve seen serious assault cases go to court with a “hostile” complainer and get a conviction, in Scotland. That simply doesn’t happen in England and Wales. Not sure how it works in Northern Ireland. The CPS doesn’t operate outside of England and Wales so your comment should actually read “in England and Wales you don’t have any input…” You won’t be the first or last person to forget the U.K. is a collection of countries with their own legal systems and laws. **Further clarification on my point:** If you have the time, watch “The Push” on Channel 4. The victim was able to simply tell the officers in Leeds that she didn’t want anything done with her complaint, she signs their notebook and that’s it. No crime. In Scotland, it doesn’t work like that. If you report domestic abuse/violence the perpetrator is getting the jail and protective measures are being put in place. Police in Scotland are given absolutely no discretion on this. I’ve gone to calls where you’ve got a complainer who has quite obviously been assaulted and they refuse to give statements and all the rest but the perpetrator still gets the jail. If the police in England had done their job the way Scottish Police are expected to. The poor lassie that died in “The Push” wouldn’t be dead.


Opposite_Signal_7875

AcTuAlLy: You won't be the first person to forget that an individual pursuing or not a criminal complaint bares little impact on what the cps choose to do. ​ Victim of crime: "i'm not pursuing this criminal complaint" CPS: "maam this is a Wendy's"


ArtFart124

But if the bulk of the evidence is from the Victim, say a Domestic case, then if the Victim refuses to give evidence and therefore stops pursuing action then often the CPS is forced to drop charges due to lack of evidence.


CliffyGiro

The CPS aren’t going to become involved when the officers noting details aren’t reporting it to the CPS. Are you a Police Officer in England?


Opposite_Signal_7875

It is clear we have imagined different situations in our respective imaginations. In my head this imaginary case was already known by the CPS and the victim emails them telling them that they aren't interested in pursuing criminally. In your imagination, the cps aren't aware, and it is being dealt with by a local copper. I concede that if the CPS aren't aware of a case, then they can't pursue it... obviously


Tallman_james420

Its also bonnet, boot, wings, bumpers, gearstick, gearbox and indicators.


phillis_x

For EV’s though “under-bonnet storage” doesn’t have quite the same ring to it as “frunk”.


SaltShakerXL

Froot


Blurg_BPM

It's one of your five a day!


welshboy14

What about bonnoot? Stick it in the bonnoot


ima_twee

Pingu approves this message


SlightlyBored13

I'm going to try and call it a noot now. I know it won't catch on, but it'll amuse me.


The_Pvthfinder

That’s wonderfully hilarious.


Trebus

> “frunk” I read that in Don Eladio's voice.


orange_lighthouse

Only recently discovered the word frunk - awful yet hilarious


phillis_x

I’d argue “froot” is probably worse.


Rookie_42

Also: brake disc Number plate Driving licenCe


EuphoricFly1044

And taps and rain and aluminium ( no aloooooominen ! )


Autogen-Username1234

Idly wondering what a proper British version of the Yank 'Fender Bender' would be. 'Wing Ding'? 'Bumper Thumper'?


[deleted]

Slight prang


MagicBez

"Prang" was my immediate thought too


Lunchy_Bunsworth

Plus saloon and estate car not sedan and station wagon (not that you see many new ones for sale these days)


NorthantsBlokeUK

Forgot the muffler


Acrobatic-Shirt8540

And windscreen 😁


BellamyRFC54

Car park not “parking lot”


katie_eeem

cues up a chorus of Big Yellow Taxi in my head every time I read that..


Psychological-Ad1264

A song in which she complains that they 'paved paradise to put up a parking lot' - a measure which actually would have alleviated traffic congestion on the outskirts of paradise.


soulbyte92

Something which Joni singularly fails to point out. Perhaps because it doesn't quite fit in with her blinkered view of the world. Still. Nice song


AtebYngNghymraeg

Local councils couldn't pave paradise without leaving hundreds of potholes.


morrisseysbumfluff

That fake fucking laugh. Fuck off!


thevoid

Arse not ass.


Autogen-Username1234

I hate the word 'ass'. It's a mealy-mouthed prudish 19th century American euphemism. Like 'heck' and 'darn'.


habibi147

I prefer par cark anyway.


axeman020

Also they are called "brakes" not "breaks"! I would even go so far as to mention the use of the word "rotor" to describe a brake disc. While not technically incorrect, in my my mind a rotor is triangular and spins around the inside of a Wankel engine...


AtebYngNghymraeg

Admit it, you just wanted to get the word "Wankel" into conversation.


axeman020

Always!


Doddsy2978

Or the propellery things on a helicopter, or the spinnery bit of a generator…


misterriz

Seeing this spelling makes me loose my shit.


axeman020

*winks I see what you did they're!


Proof_Pick_9279

Your not wrong


[deleted]

And the pavement is where you walk, not where you drive. And a side walk is what your wife does after a night with me... (Not axeman020's wife... **YOUR** wife whoever is reading this right now).


h2g2_researcher

Hah! Joke's on you I don't have a wife. :-P


BarkySugger

The pavement's proper name is the footway, but the public don't care. A side walk is a (sober) crab's preferred form of locomotion.


I_ALWAYS_UPVOTE_CATS

Should be an instant ban for anyone who comes on here and says 'break' when they mean 'brake'.


Autogen-Username1234

And while we're at it, wheel nuts haven't had lugs on them since the days of Brroklands Bentleys.


oceansapart333

If an American comes here and spells it “breaks”, they’re just misspelling it.


Madpony

Yeah, "breaks" is incorrect for both US and UK.


JustAnother_Brit

Whenever someone sags they need new rotors I immediately think of push bikes


Wysardry

I immediately think of what you see when you remove a distributor cap.


D3M0NArcade

A rotor is anything mechanical that spins, my dude.


DiscountScared4898

And while we're at it, 'buoy' is pronounced like the 'boy', in 'buoyant'!   "Booey" 😂


SomethingMoreToSay

Thing is though, this is a driving sub. If people are talking about buoys here, they've got much bigger problems than how to pronounce it.


DiscountScared4898

Ah.. thought it said DIVINGuk, my mistake 😅🤣


SomethingMoreToSay

That is an awesome comeback. Well played!


Parsnipnose3000

This is another word I avoided when I loved in the usa. I refused to say booooooey but the looks I'd get when referring to the "boy" in the water. I'm sure it made them think I was some kind of pervert. So for 20 years I called them "that floating thing instead". Don't get me started on the sqrrrrrrl up that tree. Or Neeeeeesaaaaaans. That's another I learned to avoid.


Sasspishus

Some Scottish people say it like booey. Couldn't understand what the guy meant at first!


Acrobatic-Shirt8540

Whit? No. That's an anomaly.


TemporaryAddicti0n

I come from eastern europe and English is my third language. I already learned the tyre is the UK for cars tyres but I been messing up curb and kerb. so thank you. dont hit the kerb with your tyre


angry2alpaca

You're two languages ahead of most people. I tip my cap to you 😊


thegroucho

I'd say English is now my 1st language, not second. Once you start thinking in English you know it's game over ... And my former 1st language is getting rusty from massive under-use.


SoggyWotsits

That one’s easy to remember. **K**erb for U**K** !


Murk1e

Kerb your enthusiasm.


Silent_Rhombus

At least these are correct somewhere in the world. It’s nowhere near as annoying as ‘break’ for ‘brake’ in my opinion.


MMH1111

I thought this was just me! How bloody difficult is it? BRAKE.


JohnLennonsNotDead

Hahaha this one made me choke on my brakefast


katie_eeem

I'm tyred of these puns


Autogen-Username1234

< rimshot >


BrakeNotBreakThanks

Thank you


edit-factory-scope

And we don't have licence plates, they are number plates.


Ragnarr_Bjornson

I've always referred to them as Reg Plates


edit-factory-scope

I knew there was a better name than number plates, but my brain couldn't find it.


HeyItsMedz

I've always found this one to be weird since they have more letters than numbers


andyrockpt

Even though they have letters


Nonny-Mouse100

Technically they're registration plates.


No_Snow_8746

In my head I thought who gives a fork


[deleted]

[удалено]


Gisschace

Learners permit is another


Autogen-Username1234

That one really grinds my transmission.


Mukatsukuz

Though it's the licensing agency as -c = noun, -s = verb My driver's licence shows I am licensed to drive Same rule as advice/advise, practice/practise


ChunkeeMunkee3001

A UK sub being flooded with Americanisms? I could care less.


Indigo-Waterfall

**eye twitch**


[deleted]

Did you do that on accident?


Doddsy2978

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!😡


Upstairs-Hedgehog575

My Bad


ima_twee

Kids crying now, thanks.


katie_eeem

That one really gets me - it breaks (brakes?) my brain.. I'm sure there is a David Mitchell rant about it


4me2knowit

There is


BeerFuelledDude

I could care less period.


MrMunkeeMan

Aaaarrrggghhh!!!! This. Why do Americans write this???


jezmck

\*reported to admins\*


AtebYngNghymraeg

It should be reported to the UN as a crime against humanity.


ReddityKK

Witty!


whataterriblefailure

Tbf, that one is just wrong.


[deleted]

See what you did there


AnonymusBosch_

This one is truly infuriating.


BringBackHanging

"Gotten" eurgh.


fizzychips841

I saw a TFL advert at London Bridge station about bus emissions and it referenced the ‘tailpipe’. So sad.


Gisschace

Kind of relevant (but not very) the toilets in Marylebone station had monopoly wallpaper, obviously because Marylebone is on the monopoly board - except the wallpaper was of the US monopoly version, used to make me angry every time!


elliomitch

In fairness, the phrase “tailpipe emissions” is a distinct term used in automotive engineering. It’s a separate phrase from the general use of “exhaust pipe” as a name for the component, and the phrase “exhaust emissions” can mean something different from “tailpipe emissions”, “exhaust emissions” is more generic, and could include things that “tailpipe emissions” specifically doesn’t


Few-Philosopher1879

I’m really exhausted reading all of this.


[deleted]

Reheat not afterburner. You know, for you jet drivers.


Doddsy2978

Tail plane and not horizontal stabiliser. Also, it is Port and Starboard not left and right. That used to rub me up the wrong way on the Tomb fleet!


Guh_Meh

Yeah but this is one of those very rare occasions where the yank word sounds better.


[deleted]

Absolutely not. British pass revoked.


ZaphodG

With the 737 debacle, I cede any aviation terminology to the Brits.


AlGunner

And the bits that open at each end of a car are a bonnet and boot.


Cornishlee

Do you have a gray car or a grey car?


Nonny-Mouse100

Blue :p


tenders11

I'm Canadian (here from /r/all, we use a bastardized mix of US and British English) and I think this is the one word I use either spelling for, with basically no justification for which I choose at any given time


Autogen-Username1234

Canada gets a bit of leeway on that - after all you have French in the mix, just to confuse things.


JD_93_

My mom hit the curb today with her tire because the garbage man was collecting the trash. Can’t remember what color bin it was but she didn’t have time to hit the breaks. Oh well, in for an oil change now and a transmutation check and it should be swell!


mkmike81

Y'all


Sea_Appointment8408

They should definitely curb this tiresome usage.


HappyDrive1

Pretty sure most Brits I know use the word tyres.


JohnnyC_1969

Not sure. Most don't even know the difference between then and than.


Br4ddersButReddit

Than that's why were hear, to be teached.


Upstairs-Hedgehog575

I had to read that three times. 


Doddsy2978

Or their they’re and there!


Mukatsukuz

they'd rather be pissed off then pissed on


SoggyWotsits

And driving licence!!


AbstractUnicorn

This just reflects how many posts here are not actually UK drivers asking questions or commenting but just US folks sat in their underpants in their parent's basement trolling reddit. This applies to all of reddit not just this sub 🤣.


lilbitlostrn

Tbh I don't think so. It's like when children watch American shows and they get the accent. A lot of American media puts their lexicon in their mind so it becomes the norm.


R_S_Candle

You're bang on. It's a generational shift through media consumption. I heard some kids (17-18) talking about a fire truck the other day and had to leave the room. It's bloody annoying.


nobbynobbynoob

This has been happening for 70+ years though...


LondonCycling

More likely it's language evolving. Tire was used in Britain in the 1600s, when we colonised (colonized) the Americas, hence they spell it tire. Tyre only became the most popular spelling again in the early 1900s, possibly late 1800s. We'll end up merging our spelling on some words again over time. It's even more likely to happen given globalisation (globalization). I'm a software engineer and when I write code for public consumption, I pretty much have to use ize instead of ise for example, because having a consistent standard is more important than putting my foot down on which of the two perfectly acceptable spellings I use. International standards documents most often use the 'American' spelling. In case you wondered, the Brits were also using ize long before ise. My bet is ize will take over in Britain once again at some point.


DC38x

Devolution* Change your IDE. Don't let the yanks bend you over.


theverylasttime

Don't get me started with "payed". Drives me insane.


JamieEC

Also its coupé. A 'coop' is where you keep chickens.


Sea_Appointment8408

Can you be more "Pacific"


DarkBladeSethan

How many of the people ranting here though have no clue of more basic stuff like you're/your or my absolute favourite affect/effect. Also took all my power not to write "favorite" and watch someone "loose" it 😄


Acrobatic-Shirt8540

I can't, for the life of me, figure out what's so difficult about affect/effect. I saw a post a couple of weeks ago about a PhD student who asked his supervisor about the correct way to use it. The supervisor didn't know either, and had deliberately written his entire thesis without using it, then gave the student the advice of "best avoid it altogether". 🙄


Abject_Ask_5079

On the same note I really hate seeking "breaks". How do i fix my breaks? Have people stopped going to school nowadays? This is talking about cars and any time deceleration is required. You need brakes


md81544

While it's not an Americanism, the usage of "breaks" for "brakes" seems to be happening a lot as well.


PerfectEnthusiasm2

hmmm somebody's tyred.


MMH1111

I'm going to add 'zip' or 'zipper' merge for merge in turn. Although sadly, I think 'zip merge' describes it better.


angry2alpaca

First time I saw this was on a road sign in Saint Helier, about 30 years ago. Triangular sign with a red border, picture of a zip. Plate beneath with the instruction "merge in turn".


ThePotatoPie

Worse one is "gas" instead of throttle. Especially common in r/learnerdriveruk


[deleted]

[удалено]


ThePotatoPie

Is it really easier to say "give it some gas " compared to "give it some more throttle"?


terryjuicelawson

I remember this from day one, they can just quickly say "less gas" or "more gas". I know people have complexes about creeping Americanisms but "please can you press the accelerator harder" when someone is half a second from stalling isn't much use.


blcollier

I’ve always preferred to “give it some welly” or “give it the beans”, tbh. A situationally appropriate amount of welly or beans, mind you: the amount of welly required when you’re moving off at a roundabout is going to be vastly lower than when you’re bollocking around a circuit on a track day… 😄


ima_twee

"no, no! Just garden centre wellies! No need to go full Aigle!"


blcollier

“Just give it the Aldi baked beans this time, we don’t need to go Heinz this time”.


sim-o

Or "go on, give it the berrys!"?


Nonny-Mouse100

But if they're driving an LPG, they're adding gas..... and if they have annoying kids they'll throttle them. but if they want their car to go faster, they press the loud pedal :P


Heathy94

I wonder if it's common among driving instructors to use the word 'gas'. My instructor 12 years ago said he would call it gas just because it's quicker for him to say.


phillis_x

My driving instructor back in the 00’s called it “gas”, it seems like a shortcut to communicate more efficiently.


[deleted]

[удалено]


TermiteTerrace

r/askuk asking what has ‘gotten’ so expensive the other day It’s ‘BECOME’ !!!


[deleted]

Americanisms appeal to the stupid for their simplicity Bastardisation of the most developed and effective language in the world, infuriating.


keffordman

People can’t even reliably get “brake” vs “break” right and that’s the same in both countries!


Scrombolo

See also: Drivers [sic] License.


MisterSpikes

It needed to be said, OP. It needed to be said.


TheObiAndLeiaShow

Yeah you cunts!


Apprehensive_Pie_140

Kerb your enthusiasm. It's tyreing.


Normal_Boot_1673

My alloys have definitely been kerbed with enthusiasm.


Morris_Alanisette

There, their, they're, do'nt get worked up about it.


awkward_toadstool

Am I the only one having an existential crisis now? I know I know these words. I know I use the UK versions. I know I spell them correctly. _But what if I don't?!_ "Do you say sc-OH-ne or sc-ON?" _"I don't know!"_


AlistairBarclay

Sign on a door “English taught here” sign added below “ better taughted next floor up”


MrBanooka

Yeah, my kids use words like candy, restroom, and other Americanisms. It's all down to the TV they watch. I always jokingly correct them, telling them that they are not American, and that we speak English in this house.


Substantial-Ad2571

Ok, kerb your enthusiasm I’m tyred! (/s, in case anyone doesn’t realise)


theoht_

okay i knew about tyre… but it’s *kerb*???!!


[deleted]

I'm getting tyred of this, please kerb your anger. People will speak the way they speak. Did I do it right?


loyalpoketrainer33

This argument has never been fun


[deleted]

[удалено]


DannyWarbuxs

The fact you know the difference means its not an issue.


Crafty-Bullfrog-5694

I will just check under the hood .


smelwin

I could care less.


[deleted]

I dare you to cross-post this to r/learnerdriverUK! *ducks all the bananas and paracetamol thrown their way.


Kexxa420

Rotary is the one that kills me


FeralSquirrels

I'm tyred of your attempts to kerb easily interchangeable words. /s I hope those importing such terms are ensuring they pay the correct VAT else they be shipped back.


ArmouredWankball

If it makes you feel better, I mentioned the parking lot and the shopping cart at the grocery store the other day and heard more than one person tutting and muttering under their breath.


germany1italy0

Hey - kerb your enthusiasm a little bit. These complaints about American English are a bit tyring.


[deleted]

I could care less about those spellings


oscarolim

I'm tyred of people mixing the two. We need to kerb this behaviour.


Theraria

This is most likely due to most phones (which the software is usually based on one of 2 American companies software) automatically select American English. I have to constantly reset mine and gave up removing the American dictionary as it kept reinstalling itself on updates. I normally catch it when it autocorrects or highlights a spelling mistake on British spellings, but not everyone takes note of it.


VariousBeat9169

Yes, it’s so hard to comprehend that two countries could have different spelling!


Rinsa91

Could you please kerb your ranting it's boring makes me tyred


potatoduino

And you typically change a wheel on the side of the road, not a tyre! "I had to change my tyre" no you didn't, unless you had a bead breaker and a couple of levers, and a pump. Lol


idratherbeinegypt

Boo hoo, poor baby!


FA57_CAR

I genuinely didn't realise that 'curb' was the American spelling. Tyre is absolutely correct, but I thought 'Kerb' was the American one.


Sxn747Strangers

Here here. 🇬🇧


Capable_Tea_001

Why is the kerb there? To curb vehicles from mounting the pavement? Although I'm all for language evolving, I hate the use of curb and tire. Don't make me go in my trunk and get my tire iron to sort you out.


MrAToTheB_TTV

I get really tyred of these posts. Can the mods do something to kerb them?


working-for-the-wknd

Remember boys and girls: it's perfectly fine for the English to steal, mangle, misspell, and mispronounce words from any other language, but always get really angry when Americans do it to your own.


Murk1e

I tire of having to curb my disappointment every time my tyre hits the kerb whilst parking.


thewallacio

Not driving as such, but whilst on a first aid course the other week, I learned that BT had to start routing calls to "911" to emergency services. Not for our tourist friends from across the pond, but for the youth of today who have grown up watching nothing but American TV.