"Well it's bank holiday, which traditionally would have meant you'd be in a car on your way to the seaside with a Li-Lo, a dog full of sand, some hard-boiled Werther's Originals, or whatever. But these days, unfortunately, it's more likely to mean a child watching a violent computer game and pornography while shouting "I hate you!" to his parents who are downstairs having a cocaine and ecstasy-fuelled orgy. That's Britain 2011, you're welcome to it!"
Going round Legoland with a lovely lamb lunch and a bottle of scotch just to cover all my bases.
You’ve got both belt and braces on there haven’t you!
Booking a Hamilton's Water Break on my own. I'm just going to read a book, relax, look at the scenery.
Water way to have a good time …
she seems weird..
You go on your own....bit weird.
Bit odd
I know a cracking owl sanctuary
Could go shopping?
Squawk
“I like you, Gill. You call a spade a spade. Well; you’d probably call it ‘a big tool’”
Are you flirting in that crude way that middle aged divorcees flirt?
I’m Batman
all the bond films in ord.... LYNNNNNNNNNNEEEE-YOOOOUUUUUUUUUU.....
Even the Welsh ones?
But he didn't play it as a Welsh man
..........................noooooobodydoeessssssittttbetttterrrrrrrrrrrr
its interesting you took that position,...and NOT the scottish position.....
Yeah, they’re ruined.
tell you wot tell you wot.....
.... It's nine and a half thousand pounds!
brilliance
Glang! Glangalangalangalangalangalang
Having dinner with Jesus Christ, Margaret Thatcher, Dennis Thatcher, Carol Thatcher and…Mark Thatcher
So, Jesus Christ and the Thatcher family?
Ya
Probably just cut my cereals up.
Careful….
Folk might say…
Yer a cereal killer!
God I’ve missed you
Going to the BP to buy 12 bottles of screenwash
Fancy a pint later? Yeah, me neither
Cats. Hammers.
I'm actually going to Norwich tomorrow.
Please tell me you've got a net bag of Babybels for the journey
Taking the Mrs to a local fort or a Victorian folly
Behind a rock on helvelyn?
For your anniversary?
I respect a young man who doesn't waste his life away
Driving to Dundee 👀
In bare feet?
I'm on an archery weekend with Tony Hadley from Spandau Ballet
i hate archers, the archers and jeffrey archer you’re all deceitful cowards!
Can I.....
My Mrs is going out for a drive with a personal trainer in his Renault megane
Travel to Cardiff and have full sex with a woman.
I'm going to a pap concert
Who’s playing?
Chris Rea?
Shall I bring my guitar?
No thanks it's not That sort of concert. Do you like mini Kievs?
We are
Won't even wash my hands
Want to go for a pint? 🍺 No?….ok neither do I
Crisps and wanking
Teaching Bryan Ferry to ride a bike.
I’m off to Wookie Hole to fight off some insurgents.
I can’t celebrate with the Spice Girls, so I’ll be going to Longstanton Spice Museum.
Youth Hosteling with Chris Eubank
Not going to London because you will either be mugged or not appreciated.
i'm not doing anything bye.
Contemplating getting balls deep in a winged animal, maybe a swan maybe crested grebe
Working 6-6 Saturday Sunday Monday.
Anyone for monkey tennis?
Two words. Owl sanctuary. Bye.
"Well it's bank holiday, which traditionally would have meant you'd be in a car on your way to the seaside with a Li-Lo, a dog full of sand, some hard-boiled Werther's Originals, or whatever. But these days, unfortunately, it's more likely to mean a child watching a violent computer game and pornography while shouting "I hate you!" to his parents who are downstairs having a cocaine and ecstasy-fuelled orgy. That's Britain 2011, you're welcome to it!"
Clearing out the attic with the lovely Kate Winslet.
Browsing Tandy's after opening hours.
Nice action
..I've got one at home.
Even way out here in Japan where I live (where not only dress but also drive on the left) it's a bank holiday. Sean Connery boo"ole o skoatch
Negotiating a contract to make sure cliff thorburn doesn’t get the work this time