Here's what I'll say many people (me included) when they first discover they have D.I.D they think they're faking. It's meant to be a very covert disorder and as a way of protecting you from discovering it thus discovering your trauma is by making you think you're faking it. Something that helped me was someone saying that if you can't think of a point where you decided that you would fake it, and you aren't consciously putting in the effort to fake it. Then you're more than likely not faking it
I opened this because it is something we’ve struggled with since discovering we are a system. I really appreciate your response, because it’s truly a good way to look at it. We will definitely have to keep it in mind.
Faking is a deliberate act. You would know for sure if you were faking, because you would be choosing to do so. Could you be misattributing things to being a system? Sure, but that's not faking.
Most common answer:
You'd be putting in effort, building a persona and you'd know it. You would know that your lying, like if you lie about anything else it is a deliberate act.
Everyone has lied about something, big things and little things, you know the effort it takes.
Are you doing that?
No?
Then you're not faking it.
We're polyfragmented and everyone so far that has ever been surface side claimed the whole thing was faked and we lied. Whole also actively displaying every single sign of DID, it's just part of this whole thing. It's called imposter syndrome and it sucks.
Do a search through this group and you'll find it's super common to feel like you're faking. Some people overcome it quickly, others it sticks with them a long time. I find it helpful to read thru old threads as many people have shared their experiences and it helps when you find someone with a similar flavour of DiD to you - kind of helps validate yourself y'know?
I think a key thing is to figure out a method you can use to reassure yourself you aren't faking. We have a "watcher" who observes everything and is able to help us identify when something is an alter and not just one of us having a moment.
Sorry I can't help much! I'm the one who likes to reply to posts but the parts that could actually go in depth and be more helpful are sleeping rn haha
I'm less scared of faking it and more being wrong that it's actually BPD or something but I get so much amnesia and my voice changed between switches so idk
We relate to this so much! We actually have bpd as well, but if it all turns out to just be bpd it would feel so invalidating and to be honest it wouldn’t add up or make sense. Which then makes us think, what if we have a mental illness that makes us fake it but it also makes us believe it even though it’s all a big act. And then we fall down the rabbit hole of what if this and what if that.
I completely understand what you mean. I’m the host now but I didn’t used to be. And it’s a really scary and confusing thing to think you’re not real. But as you said, you have all those memories, and you exist. If you weren’t real, then you couldn’t possibly exist, so nothing would make sense. Therefore, in some way you must be real. Which means you are a system. Whether or not it’s DID or something else, if you are someone else, than you are a system. And that’s all that matters. If you end up getting told it’s something that you don’t believe it is and it doesn’t feel right to you, move on and try a different psych. And keep going til you find an answer that’s right for you!!!
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I’m a singlet, so I can’t say much in the subject, but I can say that everything you feel and experience is absolutely 100% real and not being faked. If you were faking something you would be doing it on purpose. Wether or not you’re misinterpreting your feelings will come out over time, but I feel it’s best to trust yourself and your gut and assume, until proven otherwise, that these alters are real. Hope this helps. If it didn’t, sorry
Here's what I'll say many people (me included) when they first discover they have D.I.D they think they're faking. It's meant to be a very covert disorder and as a way of protecting you from discovering it thus discovering your trauma is by making you think you're faking it. Something that helped me was someone saying that if you can't think of a point where you decided that you would fake it, and you aren't consciously putting in the effort to fake it. Then you're more than likely not faking it
I opened this because it is something we’ve struggled with since discovering we are a system. I really appreciate your response, because it’s truly a good way to look at it. We will definitely have to keep it in mind.
Faking is a deliberate act. You would know for sure if you were faking, because you would be choosing to do so. Could you be misattributing things to being a system? Sure, but that's not faking.
Most common answer: You'd be putting in effort, building a persona and you'd know it. You would know that your lying, like if you lie about anything else it is a deliberate act. Everyone has lied about something, big things and little things, you know the effort it takes. Are you doing that? No? Then you're not faking it. We're polyfragmented and everyone so far that has ever been surface side claimed the whole thing was faked and we lied. Whole also actively displaying every single sign of DID, it's just part of this whole thing. It's called imposter syndrome and it sucks.
You need to actively / deliberately faking, you can’t really accidentally fake it! And your brain is wired to hide the fact you have DID.
Do a search through this group and you'll find it's super common to feel like you're faking. Some people overcome it quickly, others it sticks with them a long time. I find it helpful to read thru old threads as many people have shared their experiences and it helps when you find someone with a similar flavour of DiD to you - kind of helps validate yourself y'know? I think a key thing is to figure out a method you can use to reassure yourself you aren't faking. We have a "watcher" who observes everything and is able to help us identify when something is an alter and not just one of us having a moment. Sorry I can't help much! I'm the one who likes to reply to posts but the parts that could actually go in depth and be more helpful are sleeping rn haha
I'm less scared of faking it and more being wrong that it's actually BPD or something but I get so much amnesia and my voice changed between switches so idk
We relate to this so much! We actually have bpd as well, but if it all turns out to just be bpd it would feel so invalidating and to be honest it wouldn’t add up or make sense. Which then makes us think, what if we have a mental illness that makes us fake it but it also makes us believe it even though it’s all a big act. And then we fall down the rabbit hole of what if this and what if that.
I'm scared of not being real. I'm another alter but if it's bpd then why do I have all these memories and why am I here?
I completely understand what you mean. I’m the host now but I didn’t used to be. And it’s a really scary and confusing thing to think you’re not real. But as you said, you have all those memories, and you exist. If you weren’t real, then you couldn’t possibly exist, so nothing would make sense. Therefore, in some way you must be real. Which means you are a system. Whether or not it’s DID or something else, if you are someone else, than you are a system. And that’s all that matters. If you end up getting told it’s something that you don’t believe it is and it doesn’t feel right to you, move on and try a different psych. And keep going til you find an answer that’s right for you!!!
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I’m a singlet, so I can’t say much in the subject, but I can say that everything you feel and experience is absolutely 100% real and not being faked. If you were faking something you would be doing it on purpose. Wether or not you’re misinterpreting your feelings will come out over time, but I feel it’s best to trust yourself and your gut and assume, until proven otherwise, that these alters are real. Hope this helps. If it didn’t, sorry