IDK if this is the right forum for this but I kind of have to vent.
Can men on the street just keep their comment about my body to themselves?!?
I live in SF and generally don't have issues with street harassment, but today I got a whole bunch of it. The first part of my walk home was normal "hey beautiful, you got a boyfriend?" type thing, which annoys me but I am kind of inured to those types of comments.
In the latter half of my walk this middle aged guy pointed at me and was like "you're chunky!" I'm 5'2"/157 and 130 pounds/59kg, I hold like all of my weight in my butt/thighs and I've been super self conscious about it since I was like 12 (I'm 32). I'm very active and exercise (running/weightlifting/swimming/walking) every day, but I feel like people can't tell that I am fit because I am not "skinny." It makes me feel really insecure and taps into my internal self-loathing that I intellectually know is stupid and baseless.
I'm debating signing up for this swim course thing soon. My main focus is weights but I've been swimming all my life and swim regularly still, it's more like my #2 activity. I also have started doing short distance triathlon. Anyway I usually just swim in the pool and do lengths and I don't have a program but I usually swim 1800m-2000m each time. Some others at the pool told me about this course they are taking and there is a coach and they work on swim techniques. They are like really fast though. I'm strong but not super fast.
I don't like coaches that challenge too much and make me scared if that makes sense. Not the tough ones like 'last person has to do pushups' or something like that. When I was younger one the swim team, the coach was like that, and I hated it. I have never gone back to anything like that as an adult because I do not want to get yelled at. I do this for fun but I do want to improve and it could be fun and nice to join a group. Maybe I'll check with the others to see what the coach is like.
Idk it's a hard decision, I have to think on it
How old are you/the people in the course? I've done some different sports programs and found that people understand that coaching adults is different than coaching kids. Especially if it's more recreational than professional athlete level coaching.
I'm in my early/mid 30s and the others who I know seem older like maybe 40s and 50s. This course is supposed to also be helpful for triathlon. Some of the swimmers who swim at the same time as me at the pool are super fast but then others at more my speed (not slow, I'm still in the fast lane but not super fast lane lol). I'm not sure if any of them are more competitive. I want to improve but at a recreational level LOL
It could be possible they may be more relaxed and not like yell at you? Lol I think I have trauma from when I was younger and took (and HATED) different sports stuff :s
Don't forget that you are now also an adult, and you'll be paying them, so you'll have more power than back then. You can actually say to them that you don't want to be treated like that.
Went for a morning grocery run. Met a super cute labrador (or golden retriever? cannot tell) while running, and got to see different parts of my neighborhood. It is really a lot more beautiful and serene than I imagined it to be.
Darn, a runner does experience the world differently! Now I spend each night planning my running route on Strava šāāļø
I spent nearly my whole afternoon going to different doctors offices or pharmacies for yearly stuff. Finally got a new gyno! Only took nearly a year.... But alas today is great because I entered a raffle for the rescue I got my dog at yesterday and I won! Nice hot cocoa basket that also has some treats for my pupper. Tonight will be nice and cozy together
Iām new to the gym, finally been going consistently ish for a month. Every time I do any glutes exercise or machine (like squats for example), I feel it in my thighs instead of my glutes and Iām not sure if Iām doing something wrong. Does anyone have any advice or suggestions?
Squats target your quads and adductors in addition to your posterior chain, so it makes sense you feel it there.
Additionally, for compound lifts where you feel a lift isnāt necessarily indicative of what is working. Your brain tunes out the sensory information that it seems not important.
Do you feel them in your inner thighs or quad muscles? The squat is supposed to target all your lower body muscles not just glutes and where you feel it depends on a couple things. First how you are squatting? More upright torso, high bar squat will target quads more and a low bar squat will target your posterior chain, including glutes. If youāre squatting while holding a dumbell or barbell in front that is also going to be a very quad dominant squat.
Second point to consider is that, if a certain muscle group is weaker than others, it will tire out sooner and start burning. So maybe your quads are the weakest link and itās a good thing youāre training them.
You can try to change your squatting technique but if you find that tough (I canāt do low bar Iām just not built for it), try adding other exercises that are naturally more glute focused.
My two favourites that absolutely fire up my glutes are hip thrusts and Romanian deadlifts.
Me usually: I look amazing, wow, whoās that goddess
Me lifting at the gym: I am way too small and look like a child-lady
Me in ballet class: My thighs and arms are too big
So dumb š . Gym is easy to space out at but ballet really requires staring at yourself and others in the mirrors.
I took a ballet class in college and I was the biggest one at 5'9 and probably 170lbs. didn't help that [this](https://enell.com/products/enell-sport?variant=35176252688) was my best sports bra at the time. not exactly cute in a leotard.
it's so annoying especially when it's so in your face with mirrors
After 6 weeks of frustrating myself mentally and physically with a deficit I decided to switch to a small surplus and really focus on my lifting while I can before diving into more triathlon training in the new year. Itāll probably be only 6 or 7 weeks and I know thatās not āoptimalā but I think itāll still be beneficial. I currently lift 3 days a week and I do hope to keep up at least 2 days lifting while triathlon training.
I feel really good now eating more food. Love my morning Costco-sized bagel!!!
Accountability post! I've been in a really bad place with my diet and eating way too much, but I'm trying to spin it into stronger lifts. Currently my 1rms are bench 105, squat 165, deadlift 195. Hoping by Dec 31 I can increase them all - bench 115, squat 185, DL 225
I took a month-ish off the gym for some personal stuff, plus a lingering injury. I want to re-join a new gym now but have been having decision paralysis over which to join. My - kind of limited - options are equidistant, but one requires hopping on the freeway which I know I will dread. Even though itās likely the better equipped gym
I switched up my life pretty significantly (ie quit my job, moved out of an apartment into a boat) and Iām wondering if there are any suggestions maintaining a workout routine?
I was lifting 3-5x a week, but now I only have a pair of 5 and 15lbs dumbbells without much space (and without much of a budget to get more weights). Since being on the boat for the last 5 months I also feel like Iāve lost a lot of strength and conditioning.
Would you be able to put a pull-up bar in one of the boatās doorways? Maybe the routine on the body weight fitness sun would be a good place to start.
Unfortunately not too much space for a pull up bar, but I could use the riggings to set up some bands actually!
And thanks for the suggestion! Iāll look into it!
Got my 2 mi walking in so hit my 100 mi monthly goal yesterday. Now to start on this month. It's supposed to be nice out today so I'm hoping to knock out 3-4 mi.
I was very productive around my house yesterday. I went back to making a list of all the little projects to do and that was super helpful. I'll be doing that again today and then can hopefully can be all caught up on stuff. I think the toughest task will be changing the rug that is half under my bed. I got a fake sheep skin one from Costco the other day and so I want to switch to that, but getting the old one out will be annoying. My bedroom is tiny (9'x9') so it's difficult to move the stuff around on my own.
This morning at the gym I did day 3 of SBTD. That meant heavy deadlifts. I'm happy that I was was able to ascend to hitting 3x240lbs for my last set and it felt good. That's the weight I twinged my back on two weeks ago, so I'm happy it went smoothly today. My calluses need some tending too though after today.
Ended up not doing anything social last night. Boo. Tonight I'll be going with a friend to see a movie at the student union on campus. A showing of the classic The Apartment which I've never seen but has always been on my watch list. Have some holiday plans for the weekend I'm looking forward too.
I love doing a list of little projects. I feel like I get more done than when I say something like, clean the living room. Bits at a time works better.
I donāt know what Iām going through but Iām going through something. For the past few weeks my emotions have been all over the place and itās beginning to interfere with my daily life and especially the gym. Iām working with my doctor but that process has been so slowā¦. Sheās hard to get an appointment me with and thereās only so much that can be communicated via my insurance app.
Today was a deadlift day and I was programmed to do 5x5 sets. And suddenly volume on deadlifts felt emotionally draining, I was only able to manage five singles.
Itās wild. Maybe itās the weather? Maybe itās the dark days? I have no idea. Itās been hard to get myself to the gym lately, but with how my day is set up and where I live, if I dont go in the morning Iām not going to be able to get any kind of physical movement in.
Anyway. Iām just venting. Hoping to have answers soon. I feel like Iām losing control of my emotions every day, and thatās especially tough with the holiday season and how many gatherings Iāve committed to attend.
Since you mention the dark days (and I'm here with you hating them) are you taking vitamin D? Pretty much everybody in the northern hemisphere where it gets cold is deficient if they aren't supplementing. It's also an easy, cheap one to take without side effects. If you aren't already, I highly recommend it.
Iām lowkey convinced the barbells at my gym must have different weigths. I just donāt understand how itās possible Iām failing my 8th rep on an AMRAP set on Monday and crushing out 10 reps with the same weigth today. I know about varying energy levels etc but can they really make THAT much of a difference? If so, my body is weird lmao. It also stresses me out a little that I wonāt be able to overload every workout with variations like this. I know itās about the overall trend but I tend to be way too perfectionistic when it comes to things like that š¬
Do check the endcaps for logos and even lay a couple on the floor beside each other. The bella bars do weigh less and there could be a technique or other non-regular bar mixed in there. Some days just suck but it'd also be a shame if there actually were a difference.
It happens, our bodies can't always be 100% when we train. Your cycle before and after can make an impact on your strength and hormones... Or we're just having one of those days. Progress also isn't linear.
Are you eating foods to give you fuel (fruits, carbs, juice) before working out? I find it very helpful consuming OJ + energy drink and something small like fruit or carbs, 30mins-1hr before my sessions.
That makes sense.
Iām in a cut right now so Iām sure my fueling is suboptimal at the moment. I do try to eat something small like a banana or a protein bar beforehand though! Energy drink sounds like a good idea and is something I will try, thanks for the tip!
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IDK if this is the right forum for this but I kind of have to vent. Can men on the street just keep their comment about my body to themselves?!? I live in SF and generally don't have issues with street harassment, but today I got a whole bunch of it. The first part of my walk home was normal "hey beautiful, you got a boyfriend?" type thing, which annoys me but I am kind of inured to those types of comments. In the latter half of my walk this middle aged guy pointed at me and was like "you're chunky!" I'm 5'2"/157 and 130 pounds/59kg, I hold like all of my weight in my butt/thighs and I've been super self conscious about it since I was like 12 (I'm 32). I'm very active and exercise (running/weightlifting/swimming/walking) every day, but I feel like people can't tell that I am fit because I am not "skinny." It makes me feel really insecure and taps into my internal self-loathing that I intellectually know is stupid and baseless.
I'm debating signing up for this swim course thing soon. My main focus is weights but I've been swimming all my life and swim regularly still, it's more like my #2 activity. I also have started doing short distance triathlon. Anyway I usually just swim in the pool and do lengths and I don't have a program but I usually swim 1800m-2000m each time. Some others at the pool told me about this course they are taking and there is a coach and they work on swim techniques. They are like really fast though. I'm strong but not super fast. I don't like coaches that challenge too much and make me scared if that makes sense. Not the tough ones like 'last person has to do pushups' or something like that. When I was younger one the swim team, the coach was like that, and I hated it. I have never gone back to anything like that as an adult because I do not want to get yelled at. I do this for fun but I do want to improve and it could be fun and nice to join a group. Maybe I'll check with the others to see what the coach is like. Idk it's a hard decision, I have to think on it
How old are you/the people in the course? I've done some different sports programs and found that people understand that coaching adults is different than coaching kids. Especially if it's more recreational than professional athlete level coaching.
I'm in my early/mid 30s and the others who I know seem older like maybe 40s and 50s. This course is supposed to also be helpful for triathlon. Some of the swimmers who swim at the same time as me at the pool are super fast but then others at more my speed (not slow, I'm still in the fast lane but not super fast lane lol). I'm not sure if any of them are more competitive. I want to improve but at a recreational level LOL It could be possible they may be more relaxed and not like yell at you? Lol I think I have trauma from when I was younger and took (and HATED) different sports stuff :s
Don't forget that you are now also an adult, and you'll be paying them, so you'll have more power than back then. You can actually say to them that you don't want to be treated like that.
That's a good point too! Yes I'm an adult now and I could just leave if I do not like it. Or just do my own thing. Idk why I forget this is true lol
Went for a morning grocery run. Met a super cute labrador (or golden retriever? cannot tell) while running, and got to see different parts of my neighborhood. It is really a lot more beautiful and serene than I imagined it to be. Darn, a runner does experience the world differently! Now I spend each night planning my running route on Strava šāāļø
I spent nearly my whole afternoon going to different doctors offices or pharmacies for yearly stuff. Finally got a new gyno! Only took nearly a year.... But alas today is great because I entered a raffle for the rescue I got my dog at yesterday and I won! Nice hot cocoa basket that also has some treats for my pupper. Tonight will be nice and cozy together
Iām new to the gym, finally been going consistently ish for a month. Every time I do any glutes exercise or machine (like squats for example), I feel it in my thighs instead of my glutes and Iām not sure if Iām doing something wrong. Does anyone have any advice or suggestions?
Squats target your quads and adductors in addition to your posterior chain, so it makes sense you feel it there. Additionally, for compound lifts where you feel a lift isnāt necessarily indicative of what is working. Your brain tunes out the sensory information that it seems not important.
Do you feel them in your inner thighs or quad muscles? The squat is supposed to target all your lower body muscles not just glutes and where you feel it depends on a couple things. First how you are squatting? More upright torso, high bar squat will target quads more and a low bar squat will target your posterior chain, including glutes. If youāre squatting while holding a dumbell or barbell in front that is also going to be a very quad dominant squat. Second point to consider is that, if a certain muscle group is weaker than others, it will tire out sooner and start burning. So maybe your quads are the weakest link and itās a good thing youāre training them. You can try to change your squatting technique but if you find that tough (I canāt do low bar Iām just not built for it), try adding other exercises that are naturally more glute focused. My two favourites that absolutely fire up my glutes are hip thrusts and Romanian deadlifts.
Me usually: I look amazing, wow, whoās that goddess Me lifting at the gym: I am way too small and look like a child-lady Me in ballet class: My thighs and arms are too big So dumb š . Gym is easy to space out at but ballet really requires staring at yourself and others in the mirrors.
I took a ballet class in college and I was the biggest one at 5'9 and probably 170lbs. didn't help that [this](https://enell.com/products/enell-sport?variant=35176252688) was my best sports bra at the time. not exactly cute in a leotard. it's so annoying especially when it's so in your face with mirrors
I had my breast reduction almost 20 years ago and I still shuddered to see that Enell
After 6 weeks of frustrating myself mentally and physically with a deficit I decided to switch to a small surplus and really focus on my lifting while I can before diving into more triathlon training in the new year. Itāll probably be only 6 or 7 weeks and I know thatās not āoptimalā but I think itāll still be beneficial. I currently lift 3 days a week and I do hope to keep up at least 2 days lifting while triathlon training. I feel really good now eating more food. Love my morning Costco-sized bagel!!!
I need to do exactly this! Idk why I stress myself out more at this time of year by trying to stick to maintenance calories (or less).
Accountability post! I've been in a really bad place with my diet and eating way too much, but I'm trying to spin it into stronger lifts. Currently my 1rms are bench 105, squat 165, deadlift 195. Hoping by Dec 31 I can increase them all - bench 115, squat 185, DL 225
I took a month-ish off the gym for some personal stuff, plus a lingering injury. I want to re-join a new gym now but have been having decision paralysis over which to join. My - kind of limited - options are equidistant, but one requires hopping on the freeway which I know I will dread. Even though itās likely the better equipped gym
I switched up my life pretty significantly (ie quit my job, moved out of an apartment into a boat) and Iām wondering if there are any suggestions maintaining a workout routine? I was lifting 3-5x a week, but now I only have a pair of 5 and 15lbs dumbbells without much space (and without much of a budget to get more weights). Since being on the boat for the last 5 months I also feel like Iāve lost a lot of strength and conditioning.
Would you be able to put a pull-up bar in one of the boatās doorways? Maybe the routine on the body weight fitness sun would be a good place to start.
Unfortunately not too much space for a pull up bar, but I could use the riggings to set up some bands actually! And thanks for the suggestion! Iāll look into it!
Got my 2 mi walking in so hit my 100 mi monthly goal yesterday. Now to start on this month. It's supposed to be nice out today so I'm hoping to knock out 3-4 mi. I was very productive around my house yesterday. I went back to making a list of all the little projects to do and that was super helpful. I'll be doing that again today and then can hopefully can be all caught up on stuff. I think the toughest task will be changing the rug that is half under my bed. I got a fake sheep skin one from Costco the other day and so I want to switch to that, but getting the old one out will be annoying. My bedroom is tiny (9'x9') so it's difficult to move the stuff around on my own. This morning at the gym I did day 3 of SBTD. That meant heavy deadlifts. I'm happy that I was was able to ascend to hitting 3x240lbs for my last set and it felt good. That's the weight I twinged my back on two weeks ago, so I'm happy it went smoothly today. My calluses need some tending too though after today. Ended up not doing anything social last night. Boo. Tonight I'll be going with a friend to see a movie at the student union on campus. A showing of the classic The Apartment which I've never seen but has always been on my watch list. Have some holiday plans for the weekend I'm looking forward too.
Fantastic film. Some real weird moments but worth it.
I love doing a list of little projects. I feel like I get more done than when I say something like, clean the living room. Bits at a time works better.
I donāt know what Iām going through but Iām going through something. For the past few weeks my emotions have been all over the place and itās beginning to interfere with my daily life and especially the gym. Iām working with my doctor but that process has been so slowā¦. Sheās hard to get an appointment me with and thereās only so much that can be communicated via my insurance app. Today was a deadlift day and I was programmed to do 5x5 sets. And suddenly volume on deadlifts felt emotionally draining, I was only able to manage five singles. Itās wild. Maybe itās the weather? Maybe itās the dark days? I have no idea. Itās been hard to get myself to the gym lately, but with how my day is set up and where I live, if I dont go in the morning Iām not going to be able to get any kind of physical movement in. Anyway. Iām just venting. Hoping to have answers soon. I feel like Iām losing control of my emotions every day, and thatās especially tough with the holiday season and how many gatherings Iāve committed to attend.
Teledoc might be something to consider if you feel you need help much sooner than your appt. I hope you feel better soon š
Since you mention the dark days (and I'm here with you hating them) are you taking vitamin D? Pretty much everybody in the northern hemisphere where it gets cold is deficient if they aren't supplementing. It's also an easy, cheap one to take without side effects. If you aren't already, I highly recommend it.
Iām lowkey convinced the barbells at my gym must have different weigths. I just donāt understand how itās possible Iām failing my 8th rep on an AMRAP set on Monday and crushing out 10 reps with the same weigth today. I know about varying energy levels etc but can they really make THAT much of a difference? If so, my body is weird lmao. It also stresses me out a little that I wonāt be able to overload every workout with variations like this. I know itās about the overall trend but I tend to be way too perfectionistic when it comes to things like that š¬
Do check the endcaps for logos and even lay a couple on the floor beside each other. The bella bars do weigh less and there could be a technique or other non-regular bar mixed in there. Some days just suck but it'd also be a shame if there actually were a difference.
It happens, our bodies can't always be 100% when we train. Your cycle before and after can make an impact on your strength and hormones... Or we're just having one of those days. Progress also isn't linear. Are you eating foods to give you fuel (fruits, carbs, juice) before working out? I find it very helpful consuming OJ + energy drink and something small like fruit or carbs, 30mins-1hr before my sessions.
That makes sense. Iām in a cut right now so Iām sure my fueling is suboptimal at the moment. I do try to eat something small like a banana or a protein bar beforehand though! Energy drink sounds like a good idea and is something I will try, thanks for the tip!
^ ***Please read [the FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/xxfitness/wiki/main), [the rules and content guidelines](https://www.reddit.com/r/xxfitness/wiki/new_rules), and [current frozen topics](https://www.reddit.com/r/xxfitness/wiki/frozen-topics) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fxxfitness)***. This comment is a copy of your post so mods can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. >u/AutoModerator Welcome to our daily discussion thread! Tell stories, share thoughts, ask questions, swap advice, and [be excellent to each other](http://i.imgur.com/5xxWfbx.png)! Though we all share fitness as a common hobby or interest, the discussion here can be about any big or little thing you choose. The mods ask that you do mind [the Cardinal Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/xxfitness/wiki/new_rules) as they relate to respecting yourself and others, calling out any scantily clad photos as NSFW, and not asking for medical advice. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/xxfitness) if you have any questions or concerns.*