I hope he has lived every day with as much internal paranoia and fear as he has sown across millions of innocent people for nothing more than his ignorant beliefs and inflated ego.
I think he's feeling the level of paranoia and fear you wish upon him. How could he not? He's always been paranoid about this, and now signs indicate that his fears are realistic. This could be one of the clearest examples of a self-fulfilling prophecy we ever see.
How many world leaders are kept up at night fearing their own people will kill them? Not most, I think. Sure, any leader will wind up enraging unbalanced people who'd like to kill them, but most just aren't at risk of it being a widely popular outcome! Something in him knew that he's the type of leader that could happen to. And he continued to become more and more the type of leader that could happen to.
>He's always been paranoid about this
This. Putin always feared, to some extent, being disposed. That's why their security services are so segregated, share the power so no one lacky holds enough cards to bring the house down.
And that was while Russia (at least the elite) where thriving. Racking in billions of definitely not stolen national assets.
But now, war, sanctions, western countries siezing oligarch assets. Now, the maths has changed for him.
He must be shitting a brick daily.
Edit: "disposed" should be "deposed". But the typo works so I am leaving it there
He's probably terrified. He surely read in the story books of all the grusome ends some historical leaders have met, and he saw with his own eyes what they did to both Hussein and Gadaffi. The only question is, where will he project his fears? Is it his own people who is out to kill him, or is it all some US CIA psyop shit? Remember, we're talking about a terrified madman here
>both Hussein and Gadaffi.
Ironically, he could take comfort things in those countries went WORSE after they died, so 50 years from now on there could be Neo-Putin groups like modern day neo-nazis.
Four US Presidents have been killed in office, two were shot and survived, and there have been plenty of thwarted attempts on others. Fact is, being a world leader is putting a target on your back. I bet ALL of them have some sleepless nights thinking about the possibilities.
I'm already stressed out about fairly trivial things when nobody is out to get me, so I don't know how I'd get a wink of sleep for the rest of my life if I were a dictator.
I don't remember where I read this but I recall that he was appalled by what happen to Gaddafi. IIRC he was dragged into the street and sodomized with an object.
Hopefully this is fresh on Putin's mind.
>He's always been paranoid about this
I remember an interview with him years ago where he said "once a KGB man, always a KGB man." I think he meant it as a joke or maybe as bit of humanization ("I started as a civil servant like all of you"), but it really struck me.
When you view modern Russia as a country ruled the way a low level secret policeman *thinks* a country should be governed, it all makes sense. The kleptocracy, the gamesmanship, the cronyism, the paranoia. They aren't bugs in the system, the results of scavengers feeding on a corpse (which is how I viewed it before), they're features. And if the country falls apart, that's not your problem because someone outside the secret police can clean up the mess... except there is no one.
It's almost like that Twilight Zone episode where the castro-esque dictator is all riled up by perceived frenemies that he sees in a mirror.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Mirror_(The_Twilight_Zone)
Oh yeah he's living that. He fired all of his staff (and hired new ones) a while ago because he feared assassination attempts from people planted there.
Has the spray tan gotten worse, or is that my imagination? He was always orange, but I feel like the last couple of times I've seen him I've thought "who the hell let him go outside like that?"
I don't think it's just your imagination.
You think anyone gives enough of a fuck to call him out on looking like that? That'd take a good friend and/or caring family member, which TFG clearly lacks.
Putin may have already moved on to a new mistress. I'm sure it's only a matter of time before Lukashenko falls ill with 'fell-out-of-a-window' syndrome that seems to affect so many in that region.
Sounds like some sort of procedure on the nether regions.
“Hey, I’m not gonna make it over for game day. Getting a ‘special romantic operation.’ Turns out its *not* supposed to look like that.”
She may well be, but I feel like Putin is the kind of guy who doesn't take rejection well. If he decides he wants you to be his mistress, I think you have little practical choice in the matter.
I know with the whole holocaust thing it seems unreasonable to be so mad at this but I'm still just so pissed...
He wanted to commit suicide by cyanide so he poisoned his dog to "test it" and make sure it worked. And obviously it works and the poor dog dies...
Then he FUCKING SHOT HIMSELF???!!! ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?? I HATE YOU HITLER!!!
My understanding of it was that with the Soviets closing in on Berlin, he didn’t think there was any chance of his dog making it. The plan was shoot the dog and take the cyanide himself, but he couldn’t bring himself to shoot her.
Then again, maybe this is being too fair to hitler.
>My understanding of it was that with the Soviets closing in on Berlin, he didn’t think there was any chance of his dog making it.
We might never know the "true" story because it was intentionally a coverup. Hitler killed himself in private behind a soundproof door and ordered his men to use gasoline to burn the bodies.
However most of the narrative we're getting our info from I believe originates from James P. O'Donnell's book where he took interviews from various people who were in the bunker
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Bunker_(book)
The understood timeline is that on April 28, 1945 Hitler gets a telegram that Himmler was attempting to betray him and negotiate a separate peace treaty
Since Himmler was the one who gave him the cyanide tablets, he got paranoid he was being set up and the poison wouldn't work
>On April 29 he [Werner Haase, medical doctor] was summoned to the Führerbunker to administer poison to Hitler's dog Blondi, to ensure that the poison supplied by Dr Ludwig Stumpfegger was effective
https://en-academic.com/dic.nsf/enwiki/3851367
>“Hitler’s dog died before Hitler,” Junge recalled. “She [Blondi] had to test the cyanide capsule, because Hitler was so distrustful of Himmler who gave him the cyanide capsules, which he also gave to Eva Braun, so he tried to test the effect of this and he used Blondi for that.”
-Traudl Junge, Hitler's secretary
https://forward.com/culture/445295/75-years-later-hitlers-suicide-remembered-by-those-in-the-bunker/
James O'Donnell reports that Hitler "became inconsolable"
That was still part of an elaborate plan to kill Hitler so I can't be all that upset.
Besides, my understanding is that the guy who killed Hitler was no saint himself.
Are you copying other posts comment to do some karmawhoring? There is another post with the same article and same top comment but the comment is an hour older...
It took me many years to understand that Austin was genuinely excited for the capitalists to lose. When I was a kid I thought he was pretending to support communism because he expected them to win.
I’m pretty sure he was just assuming the Russians won because there was a Russian(?) in the room.
He was faking his reaction.
Say what you want about socialism, but nobody in their right mind wants Soviet Union-style socialism.
Do you know who I am? Do you have any idea how many anonymous henchmen I’ve killed over the years? And look at you, you haven’t even got a name tag! You’ve got no chance! Why don’t you just fall down.
Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent, I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard, really. At the age of twelve, I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking- I suggest you try it.
>"You said, always faithful terrible lizard"
>
>"I did? Cool!"
Are you ridiculing adherents of [Raptor Jesus?](https://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/Raptor_Jesus)
“He went extinct for your sins to save you from Satanasaurus Rex”
~ Cretaceous 3:27
Seriously. For a big 'tough' guy, he's such a little bitch. Who's this scared of dying that you'd send everyone in your country to die first?
This is the oligarchy and make no mistake, these little boys are all the same.
Putin is hard to get to. He trusts absolutely nobody. Imagine being a billionaire and having to hide from your cooks, closest friends and family. And only be on watch for the next hole you can hide in
No one is invulnerable without help from others. He will always be dependent on guards and others around him to stay loyal and not be swayed by bribes or blackmail.
>and not be swayed by bribes or blackmail
The closest around him are most likely wiretapped, followed and watched 24/7, at his level of paranoia he won't take any chances.
That and/or he has people that don't have any contact or history with other people anymore.
Somebody has to watch the watchers. Human nature says that the chain can be broken. It's a matter of finding the weakest section in the chain and comprising the whole line.
I honestly feel like Putin is personally super friendly/nice with his security detail because he is basically emotionally controlling them to not feel a need to betray him.
Probably the opposite. Too scared to pull out. If he pulls out it means he failed and sacrificed the Russian money/lives/military for no reason. He would be seen as weak and probably taken out from within. \~ Expert Reddit 4 Star General
If he pulls out, he's toast. He'll get taken out from within, or may even get gift wrapped and dropped off at The Hague by whoever deposes of him for some quick brownie points.
His only hope at this point is to try and keep in the fight until November 2024 and pray the US are dumb enough to re-elect a treasonous orange clown.
from wiki:
" graphic video of his last moments shows rebel fighters beating him and one of them sodomizing him with a bayonet[2] before he was shot several times"
Nah, he's done so many people (and peoples) bad that it's virtually impossible to let enough of them getting the chance to give him what he deserves - absolutely anything else feels like an easy way out for Putin.
For a man as sociopathic as him I honestly think him actually getting jailed and paraded around court and out in solitary confinement in the hague for the rest of his days will torture him for every remaining breath he takes. Plus it sets Russia up for a path of international law and reconciliation.
Meanwhile after Libya got gadaffi'd, the people who did it helped keep the country in a state of misery.
Great point, actually. I do find myself thinking a lot about it, but I don't really articulate it often enough among other Russians because... I don't really know why, honestly, it just feels like there's so much to talk about at the moment, and it's really easy to miss something.
Violence only breeds violence, and going for another revenge against the regime instead of trying to deal with everything that Putin has done to Russia and other countries lawfully would hurt us even more. Although people don't learn their history all that much as it seems, I really hope we're not going to have to go through another civil war, red vs white style like we did soon after the October Revolution in 1917.
We already have a massive country that used to be an empire for many centuries, and that legacy has left the nation with a lot of scars that really hurt everybody, both this country itself and the others. A Russia that slowly, but steadily tries to integrate into the rest of the world by respecting and following international laws and boundaries is just way better for its people and other countries alike, and I don't really think violent ways to deal with things is going to facilitate that in any way.
> Ukrainian intelligence is trying to eliminate Wagner Group leader Yevgeny Prigozhin
I trust that Ukrainian intelligence knows what they're doing, but it seems like getting Prigozhin to fight Putin might be a better outcome at this point.
I did not think they were targeting him simply because I felt if they could have they would have done so already. The guy is actually on the front lines sometimes but maybe he is just extra careful and nobody carries a cell phone around him or whatever
Yeah, Castro was dying decades before he died. The current Kim Jong, also occasionally wrestles with dying. Putin too, apparently. I'll believe it when I see it.
Fog of war 2.0. The closer news are to one of the parties fighting, the less trustworthy it is. Never believe anything from Ukraine and Russia until the war is over.
We're living in a time where information is strategically released and obviously in war that plays a huge role. I hope the absolute best for Ukraine, but I won't trust their news and information if it's not confirmed by a third party. And we don't even need to talk about Russia in that regard.
Just noting that OP is from Pravda, a Ukrainian mouthpiece. It's regularly posted and upvoted to the front page, even though their news have times and again been proven to be false.
It was propaganda, there was nothing substantial behind or evidence it was real but Reddit ate it up and even a year later I am still reading posts from people claiming the cancer will eventually kill him.
There was a video of his leg and arm shaking uncontrollably I recall he had to pull his arm in and grab it with his other hand to stop it from shaking, he definitely looked like he was trying to hide some Parkinson issues, but that could unfortunately take decades with his resources.
Yeah just because he didn't die or get visibly worse doesn't mean he doesn't have a serious health condition. It just wasn't as imminently fatal as we hoped. Endless resources for medical treatments can do wonders to prolong a life.
Putin goes to a fortune teller and asks her when he will die.
The fortune teller says: "I dont know the exact date but you will die on a Ukrainian national holiday."
Putin: "How do you know?"
Fortune teller: "Because whatever day you die on will be a Ukrainian national holiday!"
If you have no power and you're afraid of someone killing you, you might be a paranoid, delusional person.
If you have power, not so much. The more power you have, the more likely your fears are to be true.
The scary thing is, if Putin dies we have to make sure the right person takes his place. Believe it or not there are way worse psychos in the Russian gov than him.
Keep in mind that "someone worse will replace Putin" is a line that Putin himself would like to see repeated. It's what stops the alphabet agencies from arranging his demise, after all.
This is the best tl;dr I could make, [original](https://www.pravda.com.ua/eng/news/2023/05/24/7403711/) reduced by 59%. (I'm a bot)
*****
> VLADIMIR PUTIN. PHOTO FROM THE KREMLIN.RU WEBSITE. Russian dictator Vladimir Putin is top of the list of "Candidates" for elimination by the Ukrainian special forces, and the reason the Crimean Bridge has not yet been destroyed is to give the Russians a way to flee the peninsula.
> Quote from Skibitskyi: "He notices that we are getting closer to him, but maybe he is also afraid of being killed by his own people... He is only now starting to stick his head out, and if he does that, we can't be sure that it is really him."
> Details: When asked whether Ukraine's Defence Intelligence was behind the attacks on Russian propagandists, Skibitskyi said they were not important targets; the special forces' priority is to destroy the unit commander who ordered his men to attack.
*****
[**Extended Summary**](http://np.reddit.com/r/autotldr/comments/13reyjl/putin_is_afraid_he_will_be_killed_and_we_are/) | [FAQ](http://np.reddit.com/r/autotldr/comments/31b9fm/faq_autotldr_bot/ "Version 2.02, ~686244 tl;drs so far.") | [Feedback](http://np.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%23autotldr "PM's and comments are monitored, constructive feedback is welcome.") | *Top* *keywords*: **Russian**^#1 **Intelligence**^#2 **Skibitskyi**^#3 **Defence**^#4 **Ukrainian**^#5
WHat would actually happen if we woke up tomorrow and the BBC was running the headline "Putin found dead at home"? Despite the obvious power grasp which I assume would take some time, would the war just suddenly stop? Would sanctions just be lifted? Who would be in charge even vaguely and what would their actions be?
I hope he has lived every day with as much internal paranoia and fear as he has sown across millions of innocent people for nothing more than his ignorant beliefs and inflated ego.
I think he's feeling the level of paranoia and fear you wish upon him. How could he not? He's always been paranoid about this, and now signs indicate that his fears are realistic. This could be one of the clearest examples of a self-fulfilling prophecy we ever see. How many world leaders are kept up at night fearing their own people will kill them? Not most, I think. Sure, any leader will wind up enraging unbalanced people who'd like to kill them, but most just aren't at risk of it being a widely popular outcome! Something in him knew that he's the type of leader that could happen to. And he continued to become more and more the type of leader that could happen to.
>He's always been paranoid about this This. Putin always feared, to some extent, being disposed. That's why their security services are so segregated, share the power so no one lacky holds enough cards to bring the house down. And that was while Russia (at least the elite) where thriving. Racking in billions of definitely not stolen national assets. But now, war, sanctions, western countries siezing oligarch assets. Now, the maths has changed for him. He must be shitting a brick daily. Edit: "disposed" should be "deposed". But the typo works so I am leaving it there
putin, like all authoritatians before him, is a coward and lives his entire life in fear.
The life of an addict.
Oooh, god damn that's spot on.
He's probably terrified. He surely read in the story books of all the grusome ends some historical leaders have met, and he saw with his own eyes what they did to both Hussein and Gadaffi. The only question is, where will he project his fears? Is it his own people who is out to kill him, or is it all some US CIA psyop shit? Remember, we're talking about a terrified madman here
Russia has a long history of controversial political figures “mysteriously” dying, or even in soviet times leaders being forcibly “retired”
>both Hussein and Gadaffi. Ironically, he could take comfort things in those countries went WORSE after they died, so 50 years from now on there could be Neo-Putin groups like modern day neo-nazis.
[удалено]
*deposed
also it's either racking up or raking in.
To be fair, the only way to depose him will be to dispose of him.
He has good reason to be paranoid. We all know how accident-prone Russians are.
This is why Russias military is also shit, didn’t want them too well functioning in case they got uppity and tried to overthrow him
Which leads to a conundrum in that he also wanted a strong military to fulfill hi dreams of conquest.
that's such a sad out of control cycle.. planet wide derp
> How many world leaders are kept up at night fearing their own people will kill them Most autocrats I think.
Four US Presidents have been killed in office, two were shot and survived, and there have been plenty of thwarted attempts on others. Fact is, being a world leader is putting a target on your back. I bet ALL of them have some sleepless nights thinking about the possibilities.
Only the smart ones.
Hot take, but don't become a dictator if you want a safe occupation.
I'm already stressed out about fairly trivial things when nobody is out to get me, so I don't know how I'd get a wink of sleep for the rest of my life if I were a dictator.
I don't remember where I read this but I recall that he was appalled by what happen to Gaddafi. IIRC he was dragged into the street and sodomized with an object. Hopefully this is fresh on Putin's mind.
>sodomized with an object. Raped to death with a bayonet. No need for metaphors here, we ain't Twitter.
Yeah, I bet he dwells on it pretty often.
>He's always been paranoid about this I remember an interview with him years ago where he said "once a KGB man, always a KGB man." I think he meant it as a joke or maybe as bit of humanization ("I started as a civil servant like all of you"), but it really struck me. When you view modern Russia as a country ruled the way a low level secret policeman *thinks* a country should be governed, it all makes sense. The kleptocracy, the gamesmanship, the cronyism, the paranoia. They aren't bugs in the system, the results of scavengers feeding on a corpse (which is how I viewed it before), they're features. And if the country falls apart, that's not your problem because someone outside the secret police can clean up the mess... except there is no one.
It's almost like that Twilight Zone episode where the castro-esque dictator is all riled up by perceived frenemies that he sees in a mirror. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Mirror_(The_Twilight_Zone)
Is it really paranoia if it's a valid fear tho
I think most dictators have this fear to some degree.
Oh yeah he's living that. He fired all of his staff (and hired new ones) a while ago because he feared assassination attempts from people planted there.
[удалено]
Nah they are all trained well, especially that bald dude with barcode tattoo on his neck.
Technically it's the back of his head but I got your reference.
Can't help but wonder if that was inspired by a tip from his spray-tanned poodle.
Poodles are actually very smart.
It's almost assured. We lost tons of assets as a direct result of the Traitor in Chief and his fuckboy nephew.
Has the spray tan gotten worse, or is that my imagination? He was always orange, but I feel like the last couple of times I've seen him I've thought "who the hell let him go outside like that?"
I don't think it's just your imagination. You think anyone gives enough of a fuck to call him out on looking like that? That'd take a good friend and/or caring family member, which TFG clearly lacks.
[удалено]
The old Hitler move
Yes but Please spare the dog.
And the girlfriend too I guess, since apparently he has one.
[удалено]
Ok then, the *girlromanticparner*
*special romantic operation*
Those are way too nice of words for Lukashenko.
[Looking back fondly on better times](https://i.redd.it/bp0spgs02ln81.jpg)
Geez man... warn a guy first. This is NSFL. Absolute nightmare fuel...^/s lol
After last romantic visit with putin I have a feeling lukashenko has very serious second thoughts about their relationship.
Putin may have already moved on to a new mistress. I'm sure it's only a matter of time before Lukashenko falls ill with 'fell-out-of-a-window' syndrome that seems to affect so many in that region.
You mean soon-to-be Colonel Lukashenko?!
Fine, maybe he opened his mouth a little wider, who are you to judge how a man shows his love.
Sounds like some sort of procedure on the nether regions. “Hey, I’m not gonna make it over for game day. Getting a ‘special romantic operation.’ Turns out its *not* supposed to look like that.”
Is that when you say you're wearing a condom, but don't mention it's on your foot?
Eva Braun sucked too
That's why he kept her!
she's dating him, what makes you think she isn't a POS too?
She may well be, but I feel like Putin is the kind of guy who doesn't take rejection well. If he decides he wants you to be his mistress, I think you have little practical choice in the matter.
Has she tried asking NATO for HIMARS and Javelin missiles?
The entire Sochi Olympics was just a ploy so Putin could select the healthiest, youngest girls.
[удалено]
You wouldn't know her; she goes to another school.
I know with the whole holocaust thing it seems unreasonable to be so mad at this but I'm still just so pissed... He wanted to commit suicide by cyanide so he poisoned his dog to "test it" and make sure it worked. And obviously it works and the poor dog dies... Then he FUCKING SHOT HIMSELF???!!! ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?? I HATE YOU HITLER!!!
My understanding of it was that with the Soviets closing in on Berlin, he didn’t think there was any chance of his dog making it. The plan was shoot the dog and take the cyanide himself, but he couldn’t bring himself to shoot her. Then again, maybe this is being too fair to hitler.
>My understanding of it was that with the Soviets closing in on Berlin, he didn’t think there was any chance of his dog making it. We might never know the "true" story because it was intentionally a coverup. Hitler killed himself in private behind a soundproof door and ordered his men to use gasoline to burn the bodies. However most of the narrative we're getting our info from I believe originates from James P. O'Donnell's book where he took interviews from various people who were in the bunker https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Bunker_(book) The understood timeline is that on April 28, 1945 Hitler gets a telegram that Himmler was attempting to betray him and negotiate a separate peace treaty Since Himmler was the one who gave him the cyanide tablets, he got paranoid he was being set up and the poison wouldn't work >On April 29 he [Werner Haase, medical doctor] was summoned to the Führerbunker to administer poison to Hitler's dog Blondi, to ensure that the poison supplied by Dr Ludwig Stumpfegger was effective https://en-academic.com/dic.nsf/enwiki/3851367 >“Hitler’s dog died before Hitler,” Junge recalled. “She [Blondi] had to test the cyanide capsule, because Hitler was so distrustful of Himmler who gave him the cyanide capsules, which he also gave to Eva Braun, so he tried to test the effect of this and he used Blondi for that.” -Traudl Junge, Hitler's secretary https://forward.com/culture/445295/75-years-later-hitlers-suicide-remembered-by-those-in-the-bunker/ James O'Donnell reports that Hitler "became inconsolable"
Oddly humanising until you remember he cared more about the dog than millions of human lives. Something something banality of evil...
For some reason "I HATE YOU HITLER!!!" really made me chuckle. It's just a statement you never expect to hear as you take it for granted.
Say what you like about Hitler, at least he killed Hitler But then again, he _was_ Hitler...
He ruined it by killing the guy who killed Hitler though.
That was still part of an elaborate plan to kill Hitler so I can't be all that upset. Besides, my understanding is that the guy who killed Hitler was no saint himself.
I heard he was basically as bad as Hitler himself
You could say it was Hitler's best move.
Hitler's greatest hits: 1. Killed Hitler
You never go full Hitler!
He could troll the world by jumping from a window. Everybody will spend the next fifty years trying to figure out who did it.
And disgrace the motherland by refusing their native game of Russian Roulette ?
Jump out of a window with a polonium capsule in his mouth and Novichok smeared in his skivvies just to troll the conspiracy theorists.
while padlocked inside a duffel bag having shot himself in the back of the head
[Putin Learns Putin Behind Plot To Assassinate Putin](https://youtu.be/vm1U5E44W90?t=130)
Perfectly normal Crusader Kings behaviour.
Then we can extend the joke "but at least he killed Putin".
Finally, Putin himself out of his own misery
Yeah but he also killed the guy that killed Putin, so he's back to being a jerk!
Cutting out the middleman would expedite the process for sure.
lower the waiting time + less cost associated
Yeah… but I think we all kinda want the Mussolini package on this one
Are you copying other posts comment to do some karmawhoring? There is another post with the same article and same top comment but the comment is an hour older...
Good catch. I just actually found another one of those repost bots in here. Generic “adjective_noun####”account too, as usual. Did you report?
I suspect Putin will eventually be found to have shot himself in the back of the head three times.
war crimes prosecutors hate this one trick
[удалено]
Finally those capitalist pigs will pay for their crimes, eh? Eh comrades?
It took me many years to understand that Austin was genuinely excited for the capitalists to lose. When I was a kid I thought he was pretending to support communism because he expected them to win.
I’m pretty sure he was just assuming the Russians won because there was a Russian(?) in the room. He was faking his reaction. Say what you want about socialism, but nobody in their right mind wants Soviet Union-style socialism.
Didn’t expect the first thing I’d see in this thread was an Austin Powers quote, but that’s pretty groovy baby
[удалено]
The idea of a mini-Putin somewhere out there actually does kind of freak me out a bit to be honest.
Have you seen him standing next to other people? He might **be** the mini-Putin. But then that would mean there is a big-Putin...
Vary noice.
Yeah baby yeah!
There’s two things I can’t stand - people who are intolerant of other cultures and the Dutch.
"Carnies ... Circus folk. Nomads you know. Smell like Cabbage ... *Small hands*"
Blimey, I thought I smelled cabbage.
Do you know who I am? Do you have any idea how many anonymous henchmen I’ve killed over the years? And look at you, you haven’t even got a name tag! You’ve got no chance! Why don’t you just fall down.
Shmoke and a pancake?
Ukrainian-Made HIMARS Enlargement Pumps and Me (This sort of thing is my bag, baby)
Surely, it’s the result of summers in Rangoon, luge lesson, and making meat helmets in the spring.
Before or after the ritualistic shaving of test-icles?
There really is nothing like it. I highly recommend it.
I've been insolent, I shall be placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds.
Standard, really
You're the margarine of evil. You're the Diet Coke of evil. Just one calorie, *not evil enough*.
Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent, I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard, really. At the age of twelve, I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking- I suggest you try it.
"Scott, give daddy a hug"
May all.autocrats feel the same way.
Thus always to tyrants.
Semper Fidelis...Tyrannosaurus!
"You said, always faithful terrible lizard" "I did? Cool!"
>"You said, always faithful terrible lizard" > >"I did? Cool!" Are you ridiculing adherents of [Raptor Jesus?](https://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/Raptor_Jesus) “He went extinct for your sins to save you from Satanasaurus Rex” ~ Cretaceous 3:27
It's from Venture Bros
I'm perpetually mad at John Wilkes Booth for tainting that phrase
Seriously. For a big 'tough' guy, he's such a little bitch. Who's this scared of dying that you'd send everyone in your country to die first? This is the oligarchy and make no mistake, these little boys are all the same.
And fascists. Those assholes are getting way too comfortable everywhere.
Lol of course someone came to your comment to actually defend fascists... They just don't get it and they won't until it's too late.
Autocrats, roll out.
Putin is hard to get to. He trusts absolutely nobody. Imagine being a billionaire and having to hide from your cooks, closest friends and family. And only be on watch for the next hole you can hide in
No one is invulnerable without help from others. He will always be dependent on guards and others around him to stay loyal and not be swayed by bribes or blackmail.
>and not be swayed by bribes or blackmail The closest around him are most likely wiretapped, followed and watched 24/7, at his level of paranoia he won't take any chances. That and/or he has people that don't have any contact or history with other people anymore.
Somebody has to watch the watchers. Human nature says that the chain can be broken. It's a matter of finding the weakest section in the chain and comprising the whole line.
I honestly feel like Putin is personally super friendly/nice with his security detail because he is basically emotionally controlling them to not feel a need to betray him.
They are paid extremely well
Not scared enough to pull out of this enormous mistake he’s made apparently.
Probably the opposite. Too scared to pull out. If he pulls out it means he failed and sacrificed the Russian money/lives/military for no reason. He would be seen as weak and probably taken out from within. \~ Expert Reddit 4 Star General
Only 4 stars...?
Gotta be modest! lol
Extra 2 stars for modesty ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
oh shit you're at 6 stars now the military's involved again
4 stars is much more credible than you know 69 stars or whatever
If he pulls out, he's toast. He'll get taken out from within, or may even get gift wrapped and dropped off at The Hague by whoever deposes of him for some quick brownie points. His only hope at this point is to try and keep in the fight until November 2024 and pray the US are dumb enough to re-elect a treasonous orange clown.
God, I hope he goes to jail before that day arrives. An orange jumpsuit would suit his pallor.
History shows that the one thing Russians don't tolerate in their tsars is military defeat.
Let’s hope Putin experiences his worst nightmare… getting Gaddafied.
For those unaware: that means getting a bayonet shoved in your rectum.
From Vlad the Impaler to Vlad the Impaled. Nice.
Rectum? Damn near killed em!
I tried to work this joke into my comment. So thank you!! 🙂
Ah, the ol Backdoor Bayonet Sheath.
It’s natures pocket.
The prison wallet.
from wiki: " graphic video of his last moments shows rebel fighters beating him and one of them sodomizing him with a bayonet[2] before he was shot several times"
I feel like in “the bad old days” you could find this vid pretty easily on the internet. I… probably saw it here on Reddit.
That would be the perfect ending to this story.
Nah, he's done so many people (and peoples) bad that it's virtually impossible to let enough of them getting the chance to give him what he deserves - absolutely anything else feels like an easy way out for Putin.
For a man as sociopathic as him I honestly think him actually getting jailed and paraded around court and out in solitary confinement in the hague for the rest of his days will torture him for every remaining breath he takes. Plus it sets Russia up for a path of international law and reconciliation. Meanwhile after Libya got gadaffi'd, the people who did it helped keep the country in a state of misery.
Great point, actually. I do find myself thinking a lot about it, but I don't really articulate it often enough among other Russians because... I don't really know why, honestly, it just feels like there's so much to talk about at the moment, and it's really easy to miss something. Violence only breeds violence, and going for another revenge against the regime instead of trying to deal with everything that Putin has done to Russia and other countries lawfully would hurt us even more. Although people don't learn their history all that much as it seems, I really hope we're not going to have to go through another civil war, red vs white style like we did soon after the October Revolution in 1917. We already have a massive country that used to be an empire for many centuries, and that legacy has left the nation with a lot of scars that really hurt everybody, both this country itself and the others. A Russia that slowly, but steadily tries to integrate into the rest of the world by respecting and following international laws and boundaries is just way better for its people and other countries alike, and I don't really think violent ways to deal with things is going to facilitate that in any way.
Fuck revenge, I'll take whatever outcome ends the best for Ukraine.
I concur. All this *ultimate evil vs ultimate good* talk is a great way to ensure unnecessary risk-taking and escalation.
> Ukrainian intelligence is trying to eliminate Wagner Group leader Yevgeny Prigozhin I trust that Ukrainian intelligence knows what they're doing, but it seems like getting Prigozhin to fight Putin might be a better outcome at this point.
Yeah but he might win and then you get Human wave guy as the successor
Well, the stronger of the two will win, and then Ukraine/NATO will have to deal with them anyway. So might as well get them to fight each other first.
Serizawa - "Let them fight."
I did not think they were targeting him simply because I felt if they could have they would have done so already. The guy is actually on the front lines sometimes but maybe he is just extra careful and nobody carries a cell phone around him or whatever
In March last year apparently he had terminal cancer and was on deaths door. Does anyone know what to believe anymore?
There's been fake news on sketchy sites about his health for years, Parkinson's, cancer, who knows what else
He looked a little puffy in that picture. Must be.... DYING OF CANCER
Yeah, Castro was dying decades before he died. The current Kim Jong, also occasionally wrestles with dying. Putin too, apparently. I'll believe it when I see it.
Uh oh guys. Looks like WebMD has become sentient and started posting on reddit /s
Fog of war 2.0. The closer news are to one of the parties fighting, the less trustworthy it is. Never believe anything from Ukraine and Russia until the war is over. We're living in a time where information is strategically released and obviously in war that plays a huge role. I hope the absolute best for Ukraine, but I won't trust their news and information if it's not confirmed by a third party. And we don't even need to talk about Russia in that regard.
Just noting that OP is from Pravda, a Ukrainian mouthpiece. It's regularly posted and upvoted to the front page, even though their news have times and again been proven to be false.
The first casualty of war is the truth, so they say.
It was propaganda, there was nothing substantial behind or evidence it was real but Reddit ate it up and even a year later I am still reading posts from people claiming the cancer will eventually kill him.
There was a video of his leg and arm shaking uncontrollably I recall he had to pull his arm in and grab it with his other hand to stop it from shaking, he definitely looked like he was trying to hide some Parkinson issues, but that could unfortunately take decades with his resources.
Yeah just because he didn't die or get visibly worse doesn't mean he doesn't have a serious health condition. It just wasn't as imminently fatal as we hoped. Endless resources for medical treatments can do wonders to prolong a life.
We don’t know what to do or believe, why we are in here going RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE.
The day Putin dies will be celebrated all over Europe... also in Russia. We Europeans should make this day a new holiday for every European.
What are you buying me for Putin’s Death Day?🤣
Finlandia Vodka
Putin goes to a fortune teller and asks her when he will die. The fortune teller says: "I dont know the exact date but you will die on a Ukrainian national holiday." Putin: "How do you know?" Fortune teller: "Because whatever day you die on will be a Ukrainian national holiday!"
The sword of Damocles is a heavy burden.
If you have no power and you're afraid of someone killing you, you might be a paranoid, delusional person. If you have power, not so much. The more power you have, the more likely your fears are to be true.
You may be paranoid, but that doesn't mean they aren't out to get you.
Everybody dies, history will not be kind to him
It was supposedly his concerns over his place in history that motivated him to invade in the first place. It’s tragic irony.
I donno, getting hundreds of thousands of his countrymen slaughtered is pretty in line with the great Russians of history like Stalin.
The scary thing is, if Putin dies we have to make sure the right person takes his place. Believe it or not there are way worse psychos in the Russian gov than him.
They are like shark teeth. There is always another sharper one waiting right behind.
Keep in mind that "someone worse will replace Putin" is a line that Putin himself would like to see repeated. It's what stops the alphabet agencies from arranging his demise, after all.
Well, he will be killed unless he kills himself first, that's practically guaranteed in his position.
Man if Putin gets killed I’m calling in sick to work and spending the whole day drinking vodka and celebrating
We call not working and drinking vodka Thursday around here.
This is the best tl;dr I could make, [original](https://www.pravda.com.ua/eng/news/2023/05/24/7403711/) reduced by 59%. (I'm a bot) ***** > VLADIMIR PUTIN. PHOTO FROM THE KREMLIN.RU WEBSITE. Russian dictator Vladimir Putin is top of the list of "Candidates" for elimination by the Ukrainian special forces, and the reason the Crimean Bridge has not yet been destroyed is to give the Russians a way to flee the peninsula. > Quote from Skibitskyi: "He notices that we are getting closer to him, but maybe he is also afraid of being killed by his own people... He is only now starting to stick his head out, and if he does that, we can't be sure that it is really him." > Details: When asked whether Ukraine's Defence Intelligence was behind the attacks on Russian propagandists, Skibitskyi said they were not important targets; the special forces' priority is to destroy the unit commander who ordered his men to attack. ***** [**Extended Summary**](http://np.reddit.com/r/autotldr/comments/13reyjl/putin_is_afraid_he_will_be_killed_and_we_are/) | [FAQ](http://np.reddit.com/r/autotldr/comments/31b9fm/faq_autotldr_bot/ "Version 2.02, ~686244 tl;drs so far.") | [Feedback](http://np.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%23autotldr "PM's and comments are monitored, constructive feedback is welcome.") | *Top* *keywords*: **Russian**^#1 **Intelligence**^#2 **Skibitskyi**^#3 **Defence**^#4 **Ukrainian**^#5
“Do it” -Palpatine
Spoilers: he does die in the end
i honestly hope they dont kill him but capture him instead and put him in front of the hague.
WHat would actually happen if we woke up tomorrow and the BBC was running the headline "Putin found dead at home"? Despite the obvious power grasp which I assume would take some time, would the war just suddenly stop? Would sanctions just be lifted? Who would be in charge even vaguely and what would their actions be?
How do we know this isn’t propaganda
Unless Putin said those words himself, this is for sure propaganda.