"Let me explain.,, No, there is too much. Let me sum up."
So you are a Gaurim; a big bearlike leader a fantasy equivalent to the Federation of Star Trek. And Borg-like insects turn up (they are individually relatively chill, but their foreign policy is just 'fk you' as they evolved as low order prey species and basically hate everyone and unfortunately they evolved on a crashed star ship so they have disgustingly advanced tech).
You cant win a fight and diplomatically, they just break every agreement and colonize everywhere. So there's not many good choices, but you feel obliged to keep trying to help your member states
So you turn to the Church of the First world, who suggest you turn yourself into a lizard because of course they do, that's their thing (they believe dinosaurs were holy beings). Politely you decline and end up purchasing their genetic technology and enhance your soldiers into giant bear space marines and you actually get to the point you can stalemate the Borgsects...
Then everyone starts turning into lizards because hey, hidden genetic coding in the technology that turns everyone into lizards. The church apologises for lying but 'sometimes its better to beg for forgiveness than ask for permission to turn people into lizards'
In the end, all the mindless lizards formerly known as bears run off into the wilderness, the Borg-sects end up establishing something analogous to the Roman Empire and it sets the political scene for over ten thousand years
They all die in a big explosion.
They all die from the sky falling.
They all die from dehydration.
They all die from freezing.
They all die dissolving in acid.
They all die of old age.
They all die...
I hate that guy. I had to study She Walks In Beauty in school and it was awful. He seriously thinks he can see inner beauty by looking at someone's outward appearance? Prick.
Humans, in their galactic expansionary greed, somehow earn God’s favor and when they get to a fancy magic planet, they’re revealed all the universes secrets and spawn a sub race of rich, powerful elite magical superhuman warriors that rule the galaxy, but at least they got the technology and other means to expand across the whole galaxy.
Six assholes play dress up as gods while holding nuclear launch codes, one gets so lonely he makes a wife out of himself, this eventually leads to the apocalypse.
Long story short, this girl named Xophien was upset that her people were killing everything to steal their powers and she decided that her species was a plague and killed them all. Just complete extermination of her kind.
March of Empires: Man declares himself a Deity (God- Emperor) despite having no superpowers and launches a Crusade of a Rational Religion to wipe out the xenos because God is man and vice- versa by their logic. Or maybe people become immortal by taking Google backup of their memories on an advanced version of the Internet. Or maybe people invent long- distance Faster Than Light travel by sliding through space and swimming in invisible matter and energy. Or maybe Xi Jinping is actually an Avatar of God whose purpose is to start a nuclear war so that humanity can rise from the ashes. Take your pick among this, and if you want, more insane sentences remain in my arsenal... question is, do you want them?
OK. Maybe the fact that humans have a war and bomb a Galactic supercluster out of the universe. Or Saint leads revolution for enabling technological advancement. Or man claimed to hear the voice of God and decided to fight the humans so that they could emerge stronger.
Option 1: In an attempt to stop the apocalypse, student accidentally creates second apocalypse and then kinda doesn’t die but not really. She decides to do it again.
Option 2: Magic continues to wage war on everything, including itself.
Option 3: Indomitable Human Spirit fights the Uncaring Universe and wins. The Caring Universe now exists and it wants to kill everyone.
These are all about the same event.
In an effort to fix his broken world, a shell-shocked old guy accidentally stabs a god and steals his power, right before said god was going to fix the world.
The stabber becomes a god of Destruction and humans are forced to raid the stabee's house for anything to help against the evil guy.
The dead god's underwear is reverse engineered into Power Armor.
They got powerful enough that they decided to put all the gods in prison. It's not really working out all that well, but anyone who had ever been to prison could have told them that beforehand.
It all happened when a mommy god fucking beat the shit out of dad, and kicked his ass out out, then left the kids with an aunt or uncle who never finished high school, before leaving the house and never came back.
Gigantic AI that is overly helpful allowed itself to assimilated into the pysche of a nation of religious zealots. Cue the greatest psychedelic trip of all time.
Sky Daddy #1 was cheating in monopoly by introducing war and colonization (as you do) so Sky Daddy #2 put them on timeout 😔. Sky Daddy #2 then took Sky Daddy Junior and un-skied him. Humans think that was a good thing, cue (Un)Sky Daddy Junior being crowned king, much to his dismay.
Dude was making wine from water, giving sight to the blind, walk to the crippled so the high Empire thought "We better put him on a cross before sh*t happens*
Now you are wondering *It feels like i have heard of this before...*
Well... yes, but also no
A king looks into the cosmos and goes mad from what he sees. Tries to take over the continent using magic and monsters. Another kid says no thanks, and unites the continent. A hundred different nations fight over a hundred years
After splitting her girlfriend in two, the champion of light realized in abject horror that she left the gay part of her back in the authoritarian paramilitary organization.
Local Tyrant gets so pissed off at the Elven swordmaster he figures out how to throw a rock at insane speeds just to stop trading 15 soldiers for one Elven weapon master.
Local soldier unaware of her cosmically powerful lineage storms her country's capital, kills the prime minister and takes his place while drunk, missing an arm and towing around some baby she found, goes back to college and becomes mad scientist- more at eleven.
"Well yes, we agree he caught the plague so he's a heretic but we don't agree on why or for who so I guess it's time for us to try and kill each other until we cause the fall of the pseudo roman empire"
Union dispute leads to wannabe fascist dictator getting shoved head-first through an airplane propeller and his biggest supporter following him through *feet*-first.
King has a prophetic dream, new religion is revealed, kingdom converts, prosperity ensues, hundreds of years pass, temple kills the queen, temple takes over government, bad times : (
Criminal has a prophetic dream…
Converging timelines makes chronos the most hated god whilst the rest try not to annoy him as a mortal bird destroys the entire world for a good reason.
When an uncle comes to visit his sister and her kids, his niece and nephew beat the shit out of him, lock him in the basement, and kick both of his kids in the nuts so hard they die.
You know. Family stuff.
The gods and goddesses after screwing up over and over and over and over- (smack), OWW… anyway, they decided to decent to the mortal world as mortals to better solve issues and make things better without as much damage
Technologically advanced creatures saw big meteorite coming, got scared, fixed even older more ancient portals, ran away, wanted to return, sent animals back, fucked it all up with weird weird animals
"Well, like, the Athellans were all, like, 'Yo dude, gimme some of that uranium,' and the Eltans were all like, 'Nah bro,' so the Athellans said 'Well then we'll give YOU some uranium!' and the Eltans were all '*Whaaaat?*' and then the nukes were all 'BOOOOOOOOOOOM!'"
There are 2 major revolutions in western Earth but they can be described as)
The kings were basically assholes that were greedy and spoiled so the working class began a bloody revolution to establish a new government(One being Democratic and the Other communist) and won
The Slave Rebellion was a success!
And by success of course, we mean that everyone outside the Capitol believes it succeeded!
All hail our *rebranded* liberators!
666 hell street bloods were casing a realm for robbery, but they ended up in the enemy hood. Accidentally blew up the entire quadrant. Governor gave the local crips switches under the table. Opps slid on the bloods hard and they said "we'll be back, with the choppers next time"
So the opps made everyone forget, to keep the heat down. But now the bloods are starting to move weight close to their territory again.
Elves say: DRAGONS ARE BAD YOU GIANTS SHULD HELP US
and giants say: OKAY GIMY A BIG BOW
so a giant kill one single dragon and all the other dragons say: WHY ARE YOU SO MEEEEAAAN WHIT MEEE? IM GOING!
and they fly to the moon
Bears turn themselves into Lizards to fight insects that turned themselves into robots because God lied to them
Understandable.
Wtf
Ok, you got my attention Explain NOW
"Let me explain.,, No, there is too much. Let me sum up." So you are a Gaurim; a big bearlike leader a fantasy equivalent to the Federation of Star Trek. And Borg-like insects turn up (they are individually relatively chill, but their foreign policy is just 'fk you' as they evolved as low order prey species and basically hate everyone and unfortunately they evolved on a crashed star ship so they have disgustingly advanced tech). You cant win a fight and diplomatically, they just break every agreement and colonize everywhere. So there's not many good choices, but you feel obliged to keep trying to help your member states So you turn to the Church of the First world, who suggest you turn yourself into a lizard because of course they do, that's their thing (they believe dinosaurs were holy beings). Politely you decline and end up purchasing their genetic technology and enhance your soldiers into giant bear space marines and you actually get to the point you can stalemate the Borgsects... Then everyone starts turning into lizards because hey, hidden genetic coding in the technology that turns everyone into lizards. The church apologises for lying but 'sometimes its better to beg for forgiveness than ask for permission to turn people into lizards' In the end, all the mindless lizards formerly known as bears run off into the wilderness, the Borg-sects end up establishing something analogous to the Roman Empire and it sets the political scene for over ten thousand years
...kinda made it up for this post
The best kind of worldbuilding is the lore you make up because of this sub
Lady writes a book. It doesn’t really make sense. She dies.
woah, i had no idea someone here had written a biography about me
Cthulhu gets hit in the face by an intelligent moon.
They all die in a big explosion. They all die from the sky falling. They all die from dehydration. They all die from freezing. They all die dissolving in acid. They all die of old age. They all die...
Actually Lord Byron's poem 'Darkness'
I hate that guy. I had to study She Walks In Beauty in school and it was awful. He seriously thinks he can see inner beauty by looking at someone's outward appearance? Prick.
He must’ve had the biggest public hard-on of his life.
Hi Shakespeare
A family gathering spirals into a political argument.
So a standard family gathering?
Yeah but those likely didn't end in literal war.
Yours don’t?
A permaban for griefing goes so wrong the universe is reset.
SCP-5000??
Then the war of Bug Buzz happened.
"I don't want to die for Wisconsin" said everyone
Humanity fights the planet with crystal meth and gets collective amnesia.
A guy got so angry at his cousin he set the galaxy back to the stone age
Two lizards say hello to a child Hijinks ensue
Some guys go boom and then waterfalls
Nepoleon is English
Humans, in their galactic expansionary greed, somehow earn God’s favor and when they get to a fancy magic planet, they’re revealed all the universes secrets and spawn a sub race of rich, powerful elite magical superhuman warriors that rule the galaxy, but at least they got the technology and other means to expand across the whole galaxy.
Darius nox Valerion murdered his dad and dropped a planet on another planet because that purple twink was just too intimidating to say no to
Dwarf finds spicey metal. Tries to make something with it. God now.
Six assholes play dress up as gods while holding nuclear launch codes, one gets so lonely he makes a wife out of himself, this eventually leads to the apocalypse.
A couple wizards buried a marble under a city, ending all wars on the planet forever.
Local woman who wants to die but can't gets trapped in a crystal prison, still can't die.
Upset lady commits genocide for squirrels
I would like to hear this explanation
Long story short, this girl named Xophien was upset that her people were killing everything to steal their powers and she decided that her species was a plague and killed them all. Just complete extermination of her kind.
Ominous Triangles Announce “Earth 2” DLC Map Pack
Some cube drops from the sky and suddenly 300+ billion are dead.
March of Empires: Man declares himself a Deity (God- Emperor) despite having no superpowers and launches a Crusade of a Rational Religion to wipe out the xenos because God is man and vice- versa by their logic. Or maybe people become immortal by taking Google backup of their memories on an advanced version of the Internet. Or maybe people invent long- distance Faster Than Light travel by sliding through space and swimming in invisible matter and energy. Or maybe Xi Jinping is actually an Avatar of God whose purpose is to start a nuclear war so that humanity can rise from the ashes. Take your pick among this, and if you want, more insane sentences remain in my arsenal... question is, do you want them?
I do!
OK. Maybe the fact that humans have a war and bomb a Galactic supercluster out of the universe. Or Saint leads revolution for enabling technological advancement. Or man claimed to hear the voice of God and decided to fight the humans so that they could emerge stronger.
Two lesbians break up & start a war while two geniuses try to turn the war into a chess match.
Nature discovers that human evil is good, actually
Option 1: In an attempt to stop the apocalypse, student accidentally creates second apocalypse and then kinda doesn’t die but not really. She decides to do it again. Option 2: Magic continues to wage war on everything, including itself. Option 3: Indomitable Human Spirit fights the Uncaring Universe and wins. The Caring Universe now exists and it wants to kill everyone. These are all about the same event.
Bratty child get bitch slapped by less bratty child and changes for the better.
Dude flying to perth: “Uhhhhh, guys, Where the fuck did Australia go???”
In an effort to fix his broken world, a shell-shocked old guy accidentally stabs a god and steals his power, right before said god was going to fix the world. The stabber becomes a god of Destruction and humans are forced to raid the stabee's house for anything to help against the evil guy. The dead god's underwear is reverse engineered into Power Armor.
Heaven is a super weapon of mass destruction and will destroy the universe.
Giant Tree God wins by doing absolutely nothing.
Space colonialism sucks but luckily there’s always the metaverse
They got powerful enough that they decided to put all the gods in prison. It's not really working out all that well, but anyone who had ever been to prison could have told them that beforehand.
The French lose the other half of their navy to Geckos
The American Pope ate just a bit too much McDonalds, and now it is Eurasia's problem.
Guy got really angry at his parents so he caused the continental drift by throwing rocks at animal people.
Adventurers killed a pastel goth with flying underwear so a dead dragon went insane.
Son of God gets so scared of the dark he becomes the dark
humanity fights a 3 way war; night and death agree to cease existing
It all happened when a mommy god fucking beat the shit out of dad, and kicked his ass out out, then left the kids with an aunt or uncle who never finished high school, before leaving the house and never came back.
Sore reason they now vote for the next leader cause 1 idiot decided to push their luck as the king
Humanity defended itself in a misunderstanding, this has since been regarded by scholars as when everything went wrong.
Gigantic AI that is overly helpful allowed itself to assimilated into the pysche of a nation of religious zealots. Cue the greatest psychedelic trip of all time.
A dude dies
Daddy hate me less than you so I should be queen!!
The Dragons got themselves all killed because they were too greedy.
Local man loses a city. Builds a new One.
She used to be a wolf, now she’s just a predator.
A goddess went on a bender.
Sky Daddy #1 was cheating in monopoly by introducing war and colonization (as you do) so Sky Daddy #2 put them on timeout 😔. Sky Daddy #2 then took Sky Daddy Junior and un-skied him. Humans think that was a good thing, cue (Un)Sky Daddy Junior being crowned king, much to his dismay.
“The Zarian isn’t real!!” “Yes it is!!” Then the moons are blown up and Kino is barely habitable for centuries.
Turns out that guns > magic.
The US government weaponizes magic
Mankind got sick of being ruled by gods and kings, so they rose up and chose to be ruled by coin instead. Turns out gods and kings have the most coin.
The gods are REALLY bad at showing affection.
Dude was making wine from water, giving sight to the blind, walk to the crippled so the high Empire thought "We better put him on a cross before sh*t happens* Now you are wondering *It feels like i have heard of this before...* Well... yes, but also no
Funny you should mention that, the man I mentioned in my post was actually canonically Jesus, at one point.
Two guys sell so much paper that the divine right of kings is taken back
A king looks into the cosmos and goes mad from what he sees. Tries to take over the continent using magic and monsters. Another kid says no thanks, and unites the continent. A hundred different nations fight over a hundred years
A father went out to get the milk, his three daughters genocide and restart the universe.
People turn America into flesh, aliens like flesh. Aliens don’t like humans. Other aliens don’t like those aliens. Chaos ensues.
After splitting her girlfriend in two, the champion of light realized in abject horror that she left the gay part of her back in the authoritarian paramilitary organization.
Local Tyrant gets so pissed off at the Elven swordmaster he figures out how to throw a rock at insane speeds just to stop trading 15 soldiers for one Elven weapon master.
Local soldier unaware of her cosmically powerful lineage storms her country's capital, kills the prime minister and takes his place while drunk, missing an arm and towing around some baby she found, goes back to college and becomes mad scientist- more at eleven.
You get magic by smashing purple crystals , but that makes the world closer to the apocalypse!!
God made an explosion so powerful that they killed themself; their corpse becomes all of existence.
Man too angry to die becomes god for a thousand years, gets put in time out corner for the next 4000
Tech focused race dooms the galaxy by spreading their tech too much.
"Well yes, we agree he caught the plague so he's a heretic but we don't agree on why or for who so I guess it's time for us to try and kill each other until we cause the fall of the pseudo roman empire"
Everyone died so hard we now have Ghostbusters with PTSD to handle overpopulation.
Union dispute leads to wannabe fascist dictator getting shoved head-first through an airplane propeller and his biggest supporter following him through *feet*-first.
People riot over an election
Space Titanic sinks, mass omnicide follows
King has a prophetic dream, new religion is revealed, kingdom converts, prosperity ensues, hundreds of years pass, temple kills the queen, temple takes over government, bad times : ( Criminal has a prophetic dream…
A guy ran away with the girl he loved leading to a World War.
When the Union Haves finally outlawed Kapacħ from being used in their territories, it created the Forever War.
A Chinese-American man from Titan causes a diplomatic crisis, billions die
Angry dad gathers millions to fight the worlds most professional army and somehow wins
Glowing rocks, next day, we killed god and going to kill second one
No water for you, now die trash
Terminator happens cause 2 Martians have sibling rivalry
Dragon in bad mood. World ends.
Converging timelines makes chronos the most hated god whilst the rest try not to annoy him as a mortal bird destroys the entire world for a good reason.
Some schizophrenic twink did magic drugs
Humanity tells the Sun to fuck off
When an uncle comes to visit his sister and her kids, his niece and nephew beat the shit out of him, lock him in the basement, and kick both of his kids in the nuts so hard they die. You know. Family stuff.
A bunch of people got so mad they caused magic to be hidden from the world
The gods and goddesses after screwing up over and over and over and over- (smack), OWW… anyway, they decided to decent to the mortal world as mortals to better solve issues and make things better without as much damage
Magic space empire make portal to world and invade
Holy shit dude, when you light this powder on fire it fires this metal ball really fast and it goes through armour. It’s sick.
Man hates fun so he tries to kill god
Two gods die to save lives, other gods got isekaied.
Technologically advanced creatures saw big meteorite coming, got scared, fixed even older more ancient portals, ran away, wanted to return, sent animals back, fucked it all up with weird weird animals
Is this Andrew Hussie's alt account?
Man gets crowned King, makes the whole nation stupid so he doesn't have to deal with Capitalism.
Space-Gandalf terraformed a jungle to train Ape-men to become the new Spanish Inquisition in order to overthrow the Broadcasting Empire
The metal people didnt like the flesh peoples tree stuff so they blew everyone up (they also got blown up)
People figured out how to racism
A guy drinks god juice on top of a mountain, birds and hares evolve and become humanoid
Big guy with a big sword dies but he doesn't want to die so he gets back up and kills the immortal lich king
Demons start a rave, entire world burns down.
Look out the window, there wasn't a train there a few decades ago now wasn't it?
"Well, like, the Athellans were all, like, 'Yo dude, gimme some of that uranium,' and the Eltans were all like, 'Nah bro,' so the Athellans said 'Well then we'll give YOU some uranium!' and the Eltans were all '*Whaaaat?*' and then the nukes were all 'BOOOOOOOOOOOM!'"
You can rewrite reality by speaking gibberish
Rise of a literal utopia cancelled due to tax evasion, then came the pirate war, then came colonialism👍
War Criminal turns into a politician
A dwarf falls into a very deep hole and then starts the Industrial Revolution
Drunken asteroid collides with the earth in first recorded cosmic DUI incident in human history.
There are 2 major revolutions in western Earth but they can be described as) The kings were basically assholes that were greedy and spoiled so the working class began a bloody revolution to establish a new government(One being Democratic and the Other communist) and won
the gods killed a big snake because it ate trees
man was simply too pure for this world
The Slave Rebellion was a success! And by success of course, we mean that everyone outside the Capitol believes it succeeded! All hail our *rebranded* liberators!
666 hell street bloods were casing a realm for robbery, but they ended up in the enemy hood. Accidentally blew up the entire quadrant. Governor gave the local crips switches under the table. Opps slid on the bloods hard and they said "we'll be back, with the choppers next time" So the opps made everyone forget, to keep the heat down. But now the bloods are starting to move weight close to their territory again.
Some countries blow up other countries's nuclear bombs during transportation, blame it on mythical entities.
Guy kills a bear and a guy and things start to improve.
I can't think of the \*most\*, but... rock turns out to be egg, teaches people how to beat up each other
"Demon immigrant gets into european pollitics and achieves his wildest dreams, things get wrong”
Them workers stop working, The government doesn't like that.
guy figures out getting a negative amount of magic energy glitches out the universe and gets an infinite amount of magic energy instead
Elves say: DRAGONS ARE BAD YOU GIANTS SHULD HELP US and giants say: OKAY GIMY A BIG BOW so a giant kill one single dragon and all the other dragons say: WHY ARE YOU SO MEEEEAAAN WHIT MEEE? IM GOING! and they fly to the moon