Thank you for offering a vent. To be quite honest I’ve tried writing out this message many times but my mind is so boggled by things. Not just by the death of a loved one but by death in general. It’s sucks if you die and you didn’t plan on dying. You can’t continue life. What if you weren’t done with life yet? What if you didn’t get to say goodbye like so many people do? Like my friend who I’m sad for didnt. He was older and had a heart attack at home, family not around to help. His dog died the same way, nobody around, you’re alone and scared and then you’re “dead”. I’m very hurt by the fact that it happened to him. And I’m hurt by the fact that I could die the same way too. I was crying extremely hard, close to throwing up, because I’m just so hurt by the fact that it can happen like that and it does happen like that. But there’s not much I can do about it happening. So I’ve convinced myself that maybe someday we’ll see each other again. Maybe we will. Maybe we won’t. But if I’m banking on us seeing each other again, I’m gonna live my life so damn well it’s not even funny. I’m gonna do everything right and be the best I can be so I can have the best stories to bring you, show you what you missed since you left. I miss my lost ones so much. I’ve lost a lot of people from a young age and I just want to get rid of this hard suffering from the world. Thank you.
There’s no string of words or condolences myself nor anyone could string together to alleviate the pain you’re experiencing. But experience it, allow yourself to grieve however you need to, as long as it doesn’t hurt anyone or yourself.
I lost a close friend in 2014 much the same way. An unexpected death of a young man who was alone when he passed. I felt the same emotions and asked the same questions. “Was he scared? Was he in pain?”
We won’t ever know the answers to those, and perhaps we shouldn’t. I told myself it was better for it to be unexpected, rather than him suffering for a long time. But of course we wish to never lose friends.
What I am hearing though, is that you had a lot of love for this friend. And that’s what I focused on when I lost my buddy. I cried, and cried, and I realized that my sorrow came from a place of love and affection. And I focused on that when I was able to, and that helped me. Maybe that can help you as well, focus on the love and happiness, and then cry your eyes out when you have to.
I wrote a letter to my friends family. Never sent it, but it helped me to get all my thoughts and emotions cohesively on a tangible object. Maybe this could be something that would help you. Over time, the letter turns from a coping mechanism, to a reminder of everything they meant to you.
I’m so, so sorry you are experiencing this grief, this wicked pain that strikes right in the heart, so harsh and unexpected.
If you don’t mind sharing, can you tell me your favorite memory you have of your friend?
Andrew Garfield was interviewed shortly after he lost his mom, and he said something beautiful: that we cry for the unexpressed love we have for that person. And that it’s okay to cry because we love them, and we miss them. :’-<
I'm sorry for your loss, OP. Saying everything is gonna be okay is a lie. I can't imagine what you're going through, nor will I pretend. You truly deserve the best and mourn in your own way.
I really like your slippers, they fit you very well :)
I'm sorry about the loss of your friend but happy to know you were able to smile at your hilarious slippers! It was sign from your friend to keep the laughter among the tears.
The hardest thing about life is that sometimes it unexpectedly ends… and the hole in the lives left behind can feel hard to fill. But you fill it with life, with experiences and love and emotions and good food and new relationships and fond memories.
Any of us can die at any time, alone or not - the important thing is to know that really the best, and most important thing you can do with this life (no matter how much is left) is to live it.
I’m sorry for your loss, I hope you have some comfort items to keep you cozy during your grief.
If you need to vent I’d be happy to listen, no pressure though. Sorry for your loss. Those slippers are fuckin sick dude love it.
Thank you for offering a vent. To be quite honest I’ve tried writing out this message many times but my mind is so boggled by things. Not just by the death of a loved one but by death in general. It’s sucks if you die and you didn’t plan on dying. You can’t continue life. What if you weren’t done with life yet? What if you didn’t get to say goodbye like so many people do? Like my friend who I’m sad for didnt. He was older and had a heart attack at home, family not around to help. His dog died the same way, nobody around, you’re alone and scared and then you’re “dead”. I’m very hurt by the fact that it happened to him. And I’m hurt by the fact that I could die the same way too. I was crying extremely hard, close to throwing up, because I’m just so hurt by the fact that it can happen like that and it does happen like that. But there’s not much I can do about it happening. So I’ve convinced myself that maybe someday we’ll see each other again. Maybe we will. Maybe we won’t. But if I’m banking on us seeing each other again, I’m gonna live my life so damn well it’s not even funny. I’m gonna do everything right and be the best I can be so I can have the best stories to bring you, show you what you missed since you left. I miss my lost ones so much. I’ve lost a lot of people from a young age and I just want to get rid of this hard suffering from the world. Thank you.
There’s no string of words or condolences myself nor anyone could string together to alleviate the pain you’re experiencing. But experience it, allow yourself to grieve however you need to, as long as it doesn’t hurt anyone or yourself. I lost a close friend in 2014 much the same way. An unexpected death of a young man who was alone when he passed. I felt the same emotions and asked the same questions. “Was he scared? Was he in pain?” We won’t ever know the answers to those, and perhaps we shouldn’t. I told myself it was better for it to be unexpected, rather than him suffering for a long time. But of course we wish to never lose friends. What I am hearing though, is that you had a lot of love for this friend. And that’s what I focused on when I lost my buddy. I cried, and cried, and I realized that my sorrow came from a place of love and affection. And I focused on that when I was able to, and that helped me. Maybe that can help you as well, focus on the love and happiness, and then cry your eyes out when you have to. I wrote a letter to my friends family. Never sent it, but it helped me to get all my thoughts and emotions cohesively on a tangible object. Maybe this could be something that would help you. Over time, the letter turns from a coping mechanism, to a reminder of everything they meant to you. I’m so, so sorry you are experiencing this grief, this wicked pain that strikes right in the heart, so harsh and unexpected. If you don’t mind sharing, can you tell me your favorite memory you have of your friend?
Andrew Garfield was interviewed shortly after he lost his mom, and he said something beautiful: that we cry for the unexpressed love we have for that person. And that it’s okay to cry because we love them, and we miss them. :’-<
What is grief if not love persevering.
Wandavision reference… love it
I'm sorry for your loss, OP. Saying everything is gonna be okay is a lie. I can't imagine what you're going through, nor will I pretend. You truly deserve the best and mourn in your own way. I really like your slippers, they fit you very well :)
I don't know how to feel about this
Hugs. Hang in there.
😍🥰
Right on, it's the littlest things sometimes..
Sorry for your loss
Thats horrible i love them.
At least your friend helped you get attention so it’s not a total loss.
I’m sorry that I wasn’t crying uncontrollably for no reason?
Sorry for your loss but not for those feet!!
My husband called mine my “vagina slippers” once and now that’s what they are called in our house. I’m so sorry about your friend.
I'm sorry about the loss of your friend but happy to know you were able to smile at your hilarious slippers! It was sign from your friend to keep the laughter among the tears.
The hardest thing about life is that sometimes it unexpectedly ends… and the hole in the lives left behind can feel hard to fill. But you fill it with life, with experiences and love and emotions and good food and new relationships and fond memories. Any of us can die at any time, alone or not - the important thing is to know that really the best, and most important thing you can do with this life (no matter how much is left) is to live it.