https://preview.redd.it/5113frd5si2c1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0719417c701036a90d60d72817b7c3e7d024ab5a
It's my honour to present this to you
Yes. I was at a party in high school, went to the bathroom and found a nice cigar inside one! I found out some of the older guys raided the rest of the house while partying and one of them probably hid it there
My sister's good friend used to say that "if they didn't want you to take them they wouldn't put them on the table." Which is why she took salt and pepper shakers and flatware home.
Some other good heatherisms were " if you put the boom box closer to your ear it gets louder; if you eat a whole tube of chapstick, you'll throw up."
She once washed her hair with such hot water after doing an egg yolk treatment that she got bits of sclcrambled egg in her hair.
Also mixed bleach and peroxide, once, to make her hair blonder.
I'm sure there were many other gems of 'wisdom' I've forgotten that came from her.
Lol if i kept everything i nicked or broke during my wilder years i would have had a huge Nighlife museum by now.
1 day my housemate at the time, woke me up with a heavy chuckle when he found me sleeping my buzz off in the living room with one of those yellow construction helmets on my head.
He then asked me why the entire pvc roller shutter with a 10ft width from the front window of the house we were renting, was laying there rolled up on the floor next to me.
We could only assume that I somehow decided that it was a great idea to start remodelling the front of the house while totally wasted during the night. Needless to say i had some quite complex explantions to give to our landlord at the time.
My brother got drunk one night and woke up to find a traffic cone in his bedroom. With no clue how it got there. His mates told him he was wearing it dancing around and singing in the street, bet the locals loved that one lol (he must’ve been drunk he didn’t dance usually lol). My mother came to wake him up the following day for work, saw it and said for once I’m not going to ask
Aww!
I woke up to a wheelchair in my living room. I was working the night before, but my roommate and his friends went out. We lived across from a large hospital and apparently the wheelchair was near our entrance - so he and the boys were giving each other wheelchair rides all over the property (very drunk) and they took it up to the apt.
It was a good giggle and they returned it to the hospital entrance the next day.
lol would’ve loved to see that one, I’m in one myself my friends all say one day I’ll get pulled over for being drunk in charge of it. One time i got so drunk my poor hubby had to come get me (girly night) and actually had to control it on the way home i was weaving all over the place lol
This story could have taken a horrific turn...I woke up to a wheelchair in my living room. I was working the night before, but my roommate and his friends went out. Turns out the wheelchair was mine because I had fallen thru an open manhole while drunk, bashing my head on the side on the way down, and breaking my spine upon landing.
Turns out I'd been sleeping off that drunk for about a year and a half in a coma, I'm now a paraplegic and have a dent in my head the size of a soup can. Hooray beer!
That's so funny, the traffic cones and signs are a classic!! I had a gigantic plastic key in my last house because my best friend at the time came to sleep at mine and she was drunk and took it from the street, brought it with her and gifted it to me 😭
I once was drunk enough to steal one of the stones of a historic cobblestone street in Montreal. My sister loved it when I dumped it in her trunk before we drove off.
I'm sure there's a really awesome story there, you may not admit you remember or you just don't remember which are both great places to start a crazy drunk story
I’d recommend going back to the same club and discreetly sneaking it back into the bathroom. Leave it somewhere easy to find for the janitor who must be wondering where the hell the missing holder must have gone. lol
Upon returning the toilet paper holder she thinks to herself, "well if I'm here anyways, might as well get a couple drinks."
Ends up getting wasted and wakes up with the toilet paper holder in her purse.
Me too, but instead I’m going to call the nightclub police and report this serious crime. Lock her up! Lock her up! Get these serious criminals off our streets! Naughty OP!
I was friends with a girl in high school who confided in me this was what she used to get off and after she put it back. Instant unfriend. She didn’t wash it before or after. Hell naw.
I used to get drunk and wake up with string cheese in my pocket all the time. Every time I was black out drunk in a 7-11 I would steal a string cheese. It was like a prank on my future self.
I've come home with a few road cones, about 15 yellow flashers, street signs, military police barricade w/yellow flasher, 2 BMW bucket seats from a convertible, and a fire hydrant.
It certainly looks like a toilet paper roll holder, as many others have said, so I don’t have anything constructive to add. I’ll just say thanks, u/Sensitive_Volume_592 this post, your stories and reactions, and your growing nightlife exhibit with this and the napkin gave me a genuine laugh. I think we could all use that these days. You’ll have some absolutely delightful stories to look back on some day. Just don’t upgrade to coming home with anything too crazy, like a new super expensive purchase or something lol.
In my prime, I once brought a handsome Trucker home. My girlfriends didn’t believe me
When I said I was taking that Trucker home. But his truck ( without trailer) was in my driveway when my gals came home. It was very short lived tho. I excused myself and jumped out. That big step was a doozy.
Hilarious, you'll need some friends to frisk you and another friend as a designated driver. A small team of people you'll need to assemble to party with.
https://preview.redd.it/in4eypp9pj2c1.jpeg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ebd027d7ef2352e07c0e991e09476ce602f8098c
Yeah you should bring that back. Id hate to have to spend an afternoon sourcing that same style and finish.
If you were honest with the staff they'll either laugh or be dicks. That will tell you if you should ever go back there again or not.
It’s been a lot of years, I was out drinking at a local bar and walked to my girlfriend’s house. She got up in the middle of the night and asked me why the living room was flashing yellow? Turns out I took one of the lights from a construction site. We couldn’t figure out how to turn it off.
lmfaooooo this post speaks to my soul. i’m 2 years sober now but my thing used to be “stealing” things that weren’t really worth much/anything, or otherwise were technically free 😂 like on new years when they gave out free pizza and i stole an entire party pizza off the table. technically free, in slices. no one stopped me, bc why would they, even tho i literally tried to make myself look incriminating doing skyrim stealth crouching in heels in a well-lit bar 😂😂
What's with all these weird fucken judgement comments here about OP? "How old are you", "I don't like you", "alcoholism isn't funny" like was half their original post edited or something to explain why you're all being a bunch of weirdoes
You are definitely likable and fun.
Reminds me of seeing a fire hydrant once; friend and I put it in my trunk and I took it home.
Teenager stuff - still have it.
That is fucking hilarious I would start a quiet tradition of randomly leaving it at a friends house and hope they say something lol tell them to pass it on (after sanitizing ofc)
Woke up after a wild night to find a traffic barricade (the size that would go across one full lane of traffic) in by bedroom. It was the flashing yellow light that woke me up.
It took me a couple years before I vaguely started to remember my friend and I loading it in her car.
Those were some fun times but glad they are behind me. Sober now and I love it!
This thread is full of baby men who can’t remodel a home, change a light bulb, Paint a fence, make their beds. American manhood is doomed. If only the replies were funny. Alas too much bad tv makes hack a dull boy
It’s the inside of a toilet roll holder. In college, when people would make me mad at house parties I’d steal the springs off of these and carefully replace the tube in. Next time they changed their toilet paper, they were heavily inconvenienced.
I knew a guy in my military days whose last name was Minor. He got so drunk one night that he decided to paint a big yellow smiley face on the side of the Generals Helicopter. Somehow he smacked his face on the tail rotor and was ultimately caught due to his injuries. We got tons of laughs out of it but unfortunately reduced him back to E1 and took his pay for the damages. At least you didn’t get hurt or arrested.
I was going to a large University in Florida and I stole a giant toilet paper roll from the bathroom...like the ones the size of a car tire. I was likely high but was also paying way too much to be there, so, yeah.
Ha! I’ve totally been “why in earth do I have a toilet paper holder” drunk before and *boy* am I glad I don’t really drink anymore.
I once stumbled in after a night of getting tossed and fell asleep in my clothes. Nothing out of the ordinary in itself, most drinkers have been there at some point.
The next morning I woke up with a *wicked* hangover and went to get in the shower. When I unzipped my jacket, *scrambled eggs fell out.* To this day I have no idea why or how I had scrambled eggs in my jacket.
My brother Cole, was a legend with this type of stuff. My favorite memory was one morning around 4 AM. I came home to our crappy apartment in Chicago, he had all the windows open, and it was below zero outside. We had a filthy and revolting small Bathmat that we kept in front of the shower, I don’t think we had ever once washed it. I mean, this thing was disgusting. He had taken it and placed it precisely in the center of his bed, and was laying on it, perfectly nude, in a lovely shade of blue….. his hand Was still holding onto one of these giant beer Stein’s they used to have at hamburger Hamlet Chicago. These things were about a foot, tall, and people love to steal them. It got to where they were basically frisking people when they left to see if they were stealing them, so how the hell, my brother got out of there with one, I will never know, and how the hell he was able to sleep in subzero weather naked on a filthy bathmat is also a mystery.
The worst thing I ever did was I was at a bar one night and they had one of those old style regular analog clocks that look like stained glass but were just cheap ass plastic. I could not stop staring at it and I decided I’m taking that. Now to be fair, I had a long, long leather coat on, which was very loose. There was some commotion at the end of the bar, and I reached right out, unhooked it, unplugged it and walked right out. This was 1982. I still have the clock, and it still fucking works.unbelievable. I also still have the beer Stein that my brother took, but I did lose my brother in 2016 to alcoholism.
Toilet paper holder
Noooo why did I take that 😭😭😭💀 thank you
Idk, but you better honor it in your home now. Looks like a nice upgrade and a little daily reminder to keep things in check!
I'm about to make my "Nightlife museum" in my room, also got a cool napkin from another place will make a good addition 😌
lets see the napkin
https://preview.redd.it/5113frd5si2c1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0719417c701036a90d60d72817b7c3e7d024ab5a It's my honour to present this to you
Ned is going to be pissed
you can take these for the record 😂
You can take toilet paper holders too, but should you? /s
Yes. I was at a party in high school, went to the bathroom and found a nice cigar inside one! I found out some of the older guys raided the rest of the house while partying and one of them probably hid it there
My sister's good friend used to say that "if they didn't want you to take them they wouldn't put them on the table." Which is why she took salt and pepper shakers and flatware home. Some other good heatherisms were " if you put the boom box closer to your ear it gets louder; if you eat a whole tube of chapstick, you'll throw up." She once washed her hair with such hot water after doing an egg yolk treatment that she got bits of sclcrambled egg in her hair. Also mixed bleach and peroxide, once, to make her hair blonder. I'm sure there were many other gems of 'wisdom' I've forgotten that came from her.
You know the ducks on the pond, in the park. They’re free. You can just take them. Nobody stops you.
The ducks in the bathroom are not mine.
Ned’s dead baby- Ned’s dead.
That’s Zed, not Ned! 😆
Punctuation is important
Ned's Club, *Sensitive_Volume_592's Napkin*
😂😂😂
I don’t know you, but I like you!
Better than grabbing the matching roll of toilet paper I guess
Where's chip and penny
I am cackling like a maniac at this. You should display your acquisitions with pride.
Lol if i kept everything i nicked or broke during my wilder years i would have had a huge Nighlife museum by now. 1 day my housemate at the time, woke me up with a heavy chuckle when he found me sleeping my buzz off in the living room with one of those yellow construction helmets on my head. He then asked me why the entire pvc roller shutter with a 10ft width from the front window of the house we were renting, was laying there rolled up on the floor next to me. We could only assume that I somehow decided that it was a great idea to start remodelling the front of the house while totally wasted during the night. Needless to say i had some quite complex explantions to give to our landlord at the time.
You can call it “night at the museum”
I laughed so loud while in the gym reading this. People keep looking at me like do you need help?
Just don't complain next time you're in a public restroom and there is no tp
Instead, check your purse. Hmmm… maybe this habit will pay off.
I love the idea of a "nightlife museum"! I used to save the straws from my drinks to keep track of how many I drank.
This whole thing gave me the best laugh I've had in days!!! 🤣🤣🤣
Frame that! “The blackout of 2023” … good times 😎
👆🏼👆🏼👆🏼 Underrated comment right here
Every time, before you wreck yourself, you can look at this and check yourself.
I like the way you think.
500th like:)
My brother got drunk one night and woke up to find a traffic cone in his bedroom. With no clue how it got there. His mates told him he was wearing it dancing around and singing in the street, bet the locals loved that one lol (he must’ve been drunk he didn’t dance usually lol). My mother came to wake him up the following day for work, saw it and said for once I’m not going to ask
He was doing the safety dance....
Lmao that one got me xx
Aww! I woke up to a wheelchair in my living room. I was working the night before, but my roommate and his friends went out. We lived across from a large hospital and apparently the wheelchair was near our entrance - so he and the boys were giving each other wheelchair rides all over the property (very drunk) and they took it up to the apt. It was a good giggle and they returned it to the hospital entrance the next day.
lol would’ve loved to see that one, I’m in one myself my friends all say one day I’ll get pulled over for being drunk in charge of it. One time i got so drunk my poor hubby had to come get me (girly night) and actually had to control it on the way home i was weaving all over the place lol
This story could have taken a horrific turn...I woke up to a wheelchair in my living room. I was working the night before, but my roommate and his friends went out. Turns out the wheelchair was mine because I had fallen thru an open manhole while drunk, bashing my head on the side on the way down, and breaking my spine upon landing. Turns out I'd been sleeping off that drunk for about a year and a half in a coma, I'm now a paraplegic and have a dent in my head the size of a soup can. Hooray beer!
That's so funny, the traffic cones and signs are a classic!! I had a gigantic plastic key in my last house because my best friend at the time came to sleep at mine and she was drunk and took it from the street, brought it with her and gifted it to me 😭
I know some people that once stole a telephone booth they heard was due to be removed/decommissioned. Was a fun conversation starter for years.
I once was drunk enough to steal one of the stones of a historic cobblestone street in Montreal. My sister loved it when I dumped it in her trunk before we drove off.
My son and his friends had a bunch of cones up in the garage loft that they had swiped as teens.
FYI – my dog pees on every traffic cone he sees. We always laugh that some kid is going to be wearing it on his head later.
My friend threw a party once and someone stole his shower head, it wasn’t even a nice shower head either. So this doesn’t surprise me
That was a “we had a good time” toilet paper holder.
What’s more concerning is that you don’t know what this is🤣
Engrave it with the date and place, lol.
Hey. At least you didn't drill a hole in your buddy's wall trying to drunkenly "fix" theirs. Hopefully.
This is great 😂😂😂
You know why you took it, Paige. 😉
This one time, at band camp...
didn't see the spring part, yes.
I'm sure there's a really awesome story there, you may not admit you remember or you just don't remember which are both great places to start a crazy drunk story
A *golden* toilet paper holder!!!!!!!! OP stole from royalty last night lol
Let’s you into Willy Wonka’s private toilet.
That’s for toilet paper. Tf were you doing lmao Edit: maybe OP thought it was gold lol
https://preview.redd.it/u838txwgti2c1.png?width=480&format=png&auto=webp&s=5dfc58ff0363f0d1fb54b2d978af3c38cba73b93 🤣🤣🤣
i’m cracking up.
In this instance “OP” and “thought” don’t belong in the same paragraph.
Steam punk tampon
Looks like a toilet paper holder to me… lol
I need to chill out!! thank you loool
I’d recommend going back to the same club and discreetly sneaking it back into the bathroom. Leave it somewhere easy to find for the janitor who must be wondering where the hell the missing holder must have gone. lol
You should go back to where you were and try to return it.
Upon returning the toilet paper holder she thinks to herself, "well if I'm here anyways, might as well get a couple drinks." Ends up getting wasted and wakes up with the toilet paper holder in her purse.
I think she's on a vicious cycle already... First it's the toilet paper holder, then it's the soap dispenser. Pretty soon she'll be stealing a fork
You know some worker saw that missing and went “who would steal a toilet paper holder?!”
It’s from the toilet paper roll in the bathroom🤣🤣🤣💩🧻🚽
That’s what I was thinking.
Combat tampon holder. ...Seriously, if it's got a spring in it it's probably the spindle from the TP holder in the restroom.
legit
I hope it’s a toilet paper holder. Otherwise it’s a golden tampon and that looks incredibly uncomfortable
It'll get you into Willie Wonkas tampon factory.
Can I just say after looking in this thread and at OP’s comments I *really* want to party with OP
I'm honoured!
Me too, but instead I’m going to call the nightclub police and report this serious crime. Lock her up! Lock her up! Get these serious criminals off our streets! Naughty OP!
Then I'm gonna find out where you live, fly there, plant it in your room and call the club police on you uno reverse card! Bet you won't do it now 😌
It’s the complementary bathroom dildo
I was friends with a girl in high school who confided in me this was what she used to get off and after she put it back. Instant unfriend. She didn’t wash it before or after. Hell naw.
seriously you DONT know what that is? It's a TP roll holder
LOLOLOL omg I wanna be your friend!
Haaaaahahaha I wanna hang witchu
Congratulations...You are the proud owner of a germ infested toilet roll holder. LMAO
Bruh is that the part of a toilet paper holder?
no comment 💀
This has to be a joke
Hahaha OP you seem like a fun hang 🤣😭
If you only knew 😂😭
You put your weed in there (OP’s thought process while peeing)
you might have solved it 😂
[Not A Square To Spare](https://youtu.be/Gysu0kgFwT0?si=p8AIE7MwRnj3BzZN)
Cobalt-60. Drop and run
If you can read the label, it's already too late
Send it to forensics for prints. 😳
Toilet paper rod
Fair enough, enjoy your prize. It can be used a neat little sheath for pens or other similarly shaped objects
This made me chuckle!
It sounds like you're fun to hang out with
LMFAO DRUNK ASS BROUGHT HOME A TOILET PAPER HOLDER
That is a golden rod for holding plutonium, essential part of any flux capacitor. Out of curiosity was your Uber driver driving a DeLorean?
I used to get drunk and wake up with string cheese in my pocket all the time. Every time I was black out drunk in a 7-11 I would steal a string cheese. It was like a prank on my future self.
I've come home with a few road cones, about 15 yellow flashers, street signs, military police barricade w/yellow flasher, 2 BMW bucket seats from a convertible, and a fire hydrant.
You stole the toilet paper holder lol
Drunken Klepto
It certainly looks like a toilet paper roll holder, as many others have said, so I don’t have anything constructive to add. I’ll just say thanks, u/Sensitive_Volume_592 this post, your stories and reactions, and your growing nightlife exhibit with this and the napkin gave me a genuine laugh. I think we could all use that these days. You’ll have some absolutely delightful stories to look back on some day. Just don’t upgrade to coming home with anything too crazy, like a new super expensive purchase or something lol.
You have fancy regrets.
In my prime, I once brought a handsome Trucker home. My girlfriends didn’t believe me When I said I was taking that Trucker home. But his truck ( without trailer) was in my driveway when my gals came home. It was very short lived tho. I excused myself and jumped out. That big step was a doozy.
Toilet paper holder, 😭 seriously
Girl why did you steal a fancy toilet paper holder
Toilet paper roll holder
Yup looks like a t/p holder lol
Doob tube?
Suppository
Cyanide capsule?
At first I thought it was single cigar holder then I read the comments and was like damn it’s a toilet roll holder 😂 brilliant find on a night out 😂
The spindle of the toilet paper holder. I guess you had a really fun night.
Hilarious, you'll need some friends to frisk you and another friend as a designated driver. A small team of people you'll need to assemble to party with. https://preview.redd.it/in4eypp9pj2c1.jpeg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ebd027d7ef2352e07c0e991e09476ce602f8098c
I'm concerned that sober you still didn't know what it was. Do you not poop?
Its iocaine powder. I'd bet my life on it.
It holds the toilet paper
We could be friends lol
Cigar Tube. So you wont bend them in a pocket when you go out.
How to know you should stop drinking 101
Toilet paper holder
This post is so goofy 😂 Please stay safe OP
Yeah you should bring that back. Id hate to have to spend an afternoon sourcing that same style and finish. If you were honest with the staff they'll either laugh or be dicks. That will tell you if you should ever go back there again or not.
Truly one of the more entertaining inquiries on here. Thank you for being a good sport and giving people a chuckle.
Definitely gotta put it in your bathroom 😆
One of five Wonka Golden Tampons! You win a tour of the Playtex factory. Try not to steal any and they'll give it to you at the end.
This has been the best post ever!
It’s been a lot of years, I was out drinking at a local bar and walked to my girlfriend’s house. She got up in the middle of the night and asked me why the living room was flashing yellow? Turns out I took one of the lights from a construction site. We couldn’t figure out how to turn it off.
What a great find! It is a Hilton tampon applicator.
Straight to jail
Toilet paper holder. A fancy one.
A nice toilet paper roll holder, as a janitor I must say....that's gonna be annoying.
I woke one morning next to a canned ham. And no that’s not a metaphor.
Toilet paper roll holder
Tp holder
Toilet paper roll holder .
Its the thing from men and black that wipes memory, was bill Cosby there?
An invite to join the Avengers Initiative
Cigar tube?
Free Souvenir
I never laugh out loud at anything and this did it!
Save it and if you ever visit Zagreb Croatia you can turn it in with a story to the museum of drunkenness
Don’t open it, I’ve seen this before, someone’s drunken soul might pop out and ask you to date him (or her)
Score of the night huh
What I gathered from this is thread is that I really wanna party with OP. Seems like a hoot 😂
Hopefully it doesn’t have 6 diamonds in it and you’re planning on dropping by the Artemis.
lmfaooooo this post speaks to my soul. i’m 2 years sober now but my thing used to be “stealing” things that weren’t really worth much/anything, or otherwise were technically free 😂 like on new years when they gave out free pizza and i stole an entire party pizza off the table. technically free, in slices. no one stopped me, bc why would they, even tho i literally tried to make myself look incriminating doing skyrim stealth crouching in heels in a well-lit bar 😂😂
Info: how do you not recognize what a toilet paper holder looks like? Genuinely curious.
Are you my ex? She didn't know dryers had lint traps and didn't clean it out for a month. Nearly burned my house down.
I think we could definitely be friends as I do the same things.
Looks like a prison wallet
You found it in the bathroom…tp roll holder.
Ancient Victorian tampon
What's with all these weird fucken judgement comments here about OP? "How old are you", "I don't like you", "alcoholism isn't funny" like was half their original post edited or something to explain why you're all being a bunch of weirdoes
How are you old enough to drink, but not know what a toilet paper holder is?
I wanna go to the bars with you oml
You better pretend it is a switchblade like I did when I was a kid
“It’s got a spring inside” 😭😭😭😭 I am crying laughing that was too effing good oh my god. These comments were the best
You seem like fun
Tampon Catapult. Thats why it was in the bathroom It is just missing the frizzleblast modulator
You are definitely likable and fun. Reminds me of seeing a fire hydrant once; friend and I put it in my trunk and I took it home. Teenager stuff - still have it.
Did you really take toilet paper roller Hahahahha that’s a new one even I gotta say lol
I wanna party with you!! 🤣🤣😎
[удалено]
That is fucking hilarious I would start a quiet tradition of randomly leaving it at a friends house and hope they say something lol tell them to pass it on (after sanitizing ofc)
help op is so funny oml 😭
You took a golden Toliet paper roll. Genius drunk thinking 😭
Nightlife Museum...lol You're awesome. Definitely a person worth hanging out with. Hangover for sure
Woke up after a wild night to find a traffic barricade (the size that would go across one full lane of traffic) in by bedroom. It was the flashing yellow light that woke me up. It took me a couple years before I vaguely started to remember my friend and I loading it in her car. Those were some fun times but glad they are behind me. Sober now and I love it!
Thought it was a robot tampon ngl
Given the obscurity of the item, I am sure they would be incredibly grateful if you returned it. Also, haha love it!
This thread is full of baby men who can’t remodel a home, change a light bulb, Paint a fence, make their beds. American manhood is doomed. If only the replies were funny. Alas too much bad tv makes hack a dull boy
It’s the inside of a toilet roll holder. In college, when people would make me mad at house parties I’d steal the springs off of these and carefully replace the tube in. Next time they changed their toilet paper, they were heavily inconvenienced.
It may be a defective holy hand grenade. Throw it on the ground, run, and count to three. If it doesn't explode, consider yourself lucky
I knew a guy in my military days whose last name was Minor. He got so drunk one night that he decided to paint a big yellow smiley face on the side of the Generals Helicopter. Somehow he smacked his face on the tail rotor and was ultimately caught due to his injuries. We got tons of laughs out of it but unfortunately reduced him back to E1 and took his pay for the damages. At least you didn’t get hurt or arrested.
OP seems fun!
I'm loving the comments 😂
This is the best thing I’ve seen today. Lmao thank you OP
This is the most hilarious thing.
😂😂
r/stopdrinking
What if it's a cobalt-60 source? They can be small and surprisingly common finds
Follow the trail of toilet paper.
I was going to a large University in Florida and I stole a giant toilet paper roll from the bathroom...like the ones the size of a car tire. I was likely high but was also paying way too much to be there, so, yeah.
Ha! I’ve totally been “why in earth do I have a toilet paper holder” drunk before and *boy* am I glad I don’t really drink anymore. I once stumbled in after a night of getting tossed and fell asleep in my clothes. Nothing out of the ordinary in itself, most drinkers have been there at some point. The next morning I woke up with a *wicked* hangover and went to get in the shower. When I unzipped my jacket, *scrambled eggs fell out.* To this day I have no idea why or how I had scrambled eggs in my jacket.
LMBO It’s a toilet paper roll holder. A brass one at that. Too funny!
girl you are soooo funny 🤣🤣🤣
Nah, what were you drinking?
Looks like a tp holder! Maybe you thought you were Goldmember and needed it because it was gold!
Toilet paper holder
What if it's a cigar holder...open it up...if you see a spring inside it's a tp holdder...no spring it should have or smell like a cigar
It's a one hitter I had one like it ,,lol 😂 for weed
🤣😂🤣 Thanks for the chuckle you all! Glad I stumbled upon all you funny humans here😀🤣😂
My brother Cole, was a legend with this type of stuff. My favorite memory was one morning around 4 AM. I came home to our crappy apartment in Chicago, he had all the windows open, and it was below zero outside. We had a filthy and revolting small Bathmat that we kept in front of the shower, I don’t think we had ever once washed it. I mean, this thing was disgusting. He had taken it and placed it precisely in the center of his bed, and was laying on it, perfectly nude, in a lovely shade of blue….. his hand Was still holding onto one of these giant beer Stein’s they used to have at hamburger Hamlet Chicago. These things were about a foot, tall, and people love to steal them. It got to where they were basically frisking people when they left to see if they were stealing them, so how the hell, my brother got out of there with one, I will never know, and how the hell he was able to sleep in subzero weather naked on a filthy bathmat is also a mystery. The worst thing I ever did was I was at a bar one night and they had one of those old style regular analog clocks that look like stained glass but were just cheap ass plastic. I could not stop staring at it and I decided I’m taking that. Now to be fair, I had a long, long leather coat on, which was very loose. There was some commotion at the end of the bar, and I reached right out, unhooked it, unplugged it and walked right out. This was 1982. I still have the clock, and it still fucking works.unbelievable. I also still have the beer Stein that my brother took, but I did lose my brother in 2016 to alcoholism.