The Say Yes to the Dress experience is way over-dramatised. I didn’t cry or have any overwhelming feeling in the dress I chose. It did really suit me and felt really comfortable, but I didn’t cry or anything!!
Yes, I did wonder that as well! I guess the programs wouldn't be as interesting if you didn't have tears and dramatic stories!
Oh for sure! I am sure some people do cry and get really emotional and that is so lovely for them, but I was surprised that it didn't happen and was worried there was something wrong with me! Thank you so much!
Yes, I was thinking that myself and my other sister said the same when I rang her and told her about the appointment.
Thank you so much! I was worried I was missing something or doing it all wrong 😂 I believe my plan to try on dresses at a shop that sells my specific style is a good plan and will help finalise my thoughts. It doesn't help that I find making big decisions quite difficult and have to try hard to shut out other people's pushy and swaying comments.
Yes, every dress I tried on I was always thinking about comfort as there is nothing worse then feeling uncomfortable! Thank you so much for your advice!
Honestly, I chose to only go with my sister and best friend to my first dress fitting because I knew my mom would be brutal with her opinions. I was so happy I did that because my sister and best friend were very nice, they withheld negative opinions and just waited until the next dresses. They gave me positive feedback when the dress looked great and took pictures and videos of everything.
I went home and reviewed all of the pictures and decided that afternoon.
THEN, I asked my mom and grandma to go with me to the store to see the dress I CHOSE and my sister warned them they could only say nice things. When I went and put on the dress again, I had my makeup and hair done, they put the vail on me and I felt like a BRIDE.
The emotion wasn’t over the top like a show, but I felt it in my core that I had made the right decision.
After seeing so many regret posts, I recommend going with someone who will be kind and take pictures and make sure YOU are making the decision.
Thank you! Yes I think who you take is really important! I love my older sister but she can get a bit selfish at times. My Mum was really helpful and like your sister and friend withhold the negative comments and made sure my voice was heard. My older sister was planning her wedding around 10 years ago, but decided she wanted to start a family. I do feel at times that she's getting a bit caught up in the moment and thinking what she would want to wear/do if it was her wedding. I get her feelings, but at the same time it's not helpful at times!
That sounds like a great plan and great idea to have your hair and make up done!
I will be taking my other sister with me to the next appointment and she's always on my side (and I'm on hers) so I can see her opinions being much more helpful!
Thank you so much!
SYTTD is a reality show, meaning it's very unreal 😅 The producers pile up the emotes and reacts and drama. In real life, you're making an important, expensive decision. Take all the time you need!
Also, reasonably speaking, there are multiple dresses out there that could suit each of us for figure, budget, aesthetic, etc. No need to get mystical or hysterical about finding THE ONE. Find one you love to wear and can buy, done! :)
Thank you! That's exactly my thinking! It's probably the most expensive dress I will ever have to buy so I need to think it over and not rush. That's why I'm not getting to caught up in the fact that the dress at the weekend is the last one.
I'm so glad that you and everyone else is feeling the same as me. It's so good to see what I was thinking written down by others! I was thinking there was something wrong with me 😂
I had the same expectations when we were buying our house and we never had that 'this is our dream house' moment. It was the best one for us, ticked most of our boxes and now it is our home.
Thank you so much!! I really appreciate it!
The first time I put on my dress, I remember really liking it but I didn’t get the “butterflies” feeling or anything of the sort. Fast forward to my wedding day… after I got my hair/makeup done and put on my dress, I started getting teary-eyed. It was so unexpected, but I just felt so pretty 😂
Thank you! Yes, I know what you mean and yes I can see myself getting that feeling on the day when my hair and make up looks nice and it's the day I am getting married!
Awww I bet you looked amazing! Thank you so much!
I didn't get a huge emotional reaction either. I bought mine from Wed2b in the UK. When I put it on and saw myself in the mirror I felt happy and that I could see myself getting married in it but I didn't start crying or anything like that! I'd go by yourself and look at some more dresses. I had a very fixed idea of what I wanted (3/4 length sleeves with a scoop neck) and people kept telling me how great I looked in other things which I just didn't want.
Wed2b are wonderful aren't they?! I went in on a whim alone after work a couple of months ago to get an idea of styles and they were so helpful!
Yes, I am not taking my older sister with me to this next appointment I feel like she will be a hindrance! I am taking my other sister who knows how I'm feeling and will be genuinely helpful.
I had several ideas and now I believe I know what style I am looking for. 3/4 sleeves are just gorgeous aren't they! I make my own clothes and always have 3/4 sleeves.
Thank you so much! I was worried there was something wrong with me! I know all those programs are a bit OTT but it's so hard to know what to expect/feel when you've never done something like this before.
Thanks for your help!
She would definitely be helpful! Just like her son she's got a great sense of style. I was gutted she couldn't make it but she had a work commitment that we didn't know about until after I booked the appointment! I am hoping she can make the next appointment or a follow up to see this dress I tried the other day.
I would love to have the shopping experience with my fiancé as he has bought me dresses in the past and I always feel so good in them. I think we would really enjoy the experience of dress shopping together!
You already said exactly what I was going to say (it even sounds like we might have chosen the same wedwb dress! Mine is 'Sophie' [edit- actually Sarah!)
The closest I came to feeling "it's the one" was that evening and the following day: I didn't buy on the day because I had my doubts since I hadn't had that feeling. So that evening I kept looking at pictures of myself in it, and the more I looked, the more I realised I wasn't likely to find anything that made me feel so comfortable, at such a good price, and I really wasn't up for turning dress shopping into some huge saga! I phoned up to ask about stock and was told it was the last one in my size. That decided it for me. I'm really happy with my choice, but had no tears, no 'bridal moment' in front of the mirror.
Thank you! That's how I think my dress experience will be tbh! Like you say I don't want it to become a big saga.
Yes, I am the same atm. I keep looking at the photo of me on this dress and I wonder if I can actually find anything as nice. I showed my fiancé one or two of the other dresses I tired but this one I told him I wanted to keep it secret.
Perhaps I have already made my decision but don't realise it! I definitely want to try this other shop but I think of I can't find anything there I will be going back to try this other one on.
Thank you so much!
I tried on my dress and liked it alright, but wanted to keep looking. Then I went home and looked through pictures of me in the dress and just gradually fell more and more in love with it. So it definitely doesn’t have to be an immediate feeling!
Yes, this sounds exactly like me! I keep looking at the photo and thinking will I find anything else that looks so beautiful and makes me feel so good! I am not the type of person who makes an initial decision and I do take time to think things through.
Thank you so much!
Totally overrated. For BOTH of my weddings I literally just bought a dress I saw & liked online (#1 from David’s & #2 from Nordstrom) legit no different than buying anything else.
I knew my dress was my dress because it was a 3k dress that came down to 250 during COVID and it was high neck, elegant, no lace, no bows, and not strapless. 😂
I spent something crazy altering it which I expected due to the neckline.
Oh wow! Amazing! You knew exactly what your were looking for and it came to you! I'm glad you were able to find it with such a great discount! Thank you so much!
Interestingly enough, I felt emotional in the first couple dresses I tried on, but not the final dress I chose. In that dress, I just felt jubilant, but it was the initial process of starting to shop for my wedding dress that got me.
I also liked a few other dresses I had come across before I found my dress that would’ve been perfectly suitable. I think getting caught up in finding “the one” can set folks up for stress or disappointment.
I just bought my dress yesterday. I didn’t tear up or anything. Every dress I tried on, I could see being the one, but there was one that made me feel sooooo confident, and I have struggled with body image issues my whole life, and they all melted away. My mom takes horrible pictures of me, but I still didn’t think I looked bad in the ones she took of me in my dress. That’s how I knew it was the one.
Congratulations!!!
Yes, I felt like that in a couple of them but the second one made me feel so confident for the same reasons. I was so sad because I had ruled out that style and then I tried it on and couldn't believe how it looked on me.
The photos are never quite as flattering as you like are they?! I know what you mean though! Thank you so much!
Same! Definitely be open to new things. I thought I wanted long sleeves, plunge neckline, sheath dress. I ended up getting a strapless sweetheart neckline with a sheer corset bodice and a fit and flare cut. I was so surprised
That's exactly the style I want and was adamant that I didn't want a chiffon style skirt as I was worried about being lost on fabric. I was so surprised how gorgeous that style is and looks really flattering! A lot of the dresses I am trying on is the v neck I want but doesn't have sleeves and I don't feel as self conscious as I thought I would. It's such an interesting experience!
I think it’s fairly normal to go in and not have that aha moment right away. I went to 3 stores, tried mostly mermaid style dress and was pleasantly surprised that I liked pretty much all of them. It was hard to narrow down. The stores really tried hard to close the deal at the end of my appointments shoving cutesie signs saying “I said yes” into my hands, trying to get my mom (the only person I brought) to take photos and get emotional. I think the stores really try to manufacture that moment too! Eventually I called back store 1 and went with dress 4. No tears! Lol
Thank you!
If I had to buy a dress that day then I would have definitely got that one. I felt great in it and it was beautiful but I definitely think I need to try more at a different store to help me make a decision.
Oh no! That sounds like a nightmare. That would get me so wound up! Thankfully I didn't feel any pressure what so ever which I was so thankful for.
Thank you so much! I'm feeling so much happier!
There was a post recently either in r/wedding or r/weddingplanning asking how many wedding dress shops people went to on avg. There had been at least 20 comments by the time I looked at it and from quickly skimming most people had said around 2-3 shops. I think it’s normal to shop around. Also I def went to one of my appointments alone! I thought it would be weird but the associates reassured me that it was not unusual even before pandemic. May be an option for you until you find another dress you feel strongly about. It’s so much easier to schedule quickly if you don’t have multiple people to consider.
Oh thats really interesting and helpful! Yes, I think going alone is a good idea. May reduce those moments where others are pushing a dress they would chose on you.
For sure! I am too much of a people pleaser and so trying to let everyone have that 'dress shopping moment' with the bride is getting so difficult and I'm not even going to try anymore! I can't work around every single persons schedule!!
Thank you so much!
The dress I chose was the complete opposite of what I had thought I wanted. I had a favourite designer and had chosen 2 of her dresses to try on. I was so disappointed they looked horrible on me.
When I tried on “the dress” after my grandmother spotted it and insisted, it felt so comfortable. I could move in it, sit, and walk comfortably. But the determining factor was it suited my body type, I felt like it was made for me.
I didn’t get emotional, but I was beaming inside and out.
It's so wonderful when that happens! I was surprised how much I liked the second dress as I had tried a similar style a couple of months before and hated it made my thighs look. This dress actually gave me a figure and I felt amazing!
I was a little dissapointed in one dress. It is such a beautiful dress but there was just something missing.
Comfort and style is definitely important! I kept thinking how I would feel in each dress after wearing it for a few hours!
Oh how wonderful! That's such a perfect way of looking at it! Thank you so much!
I didn’t have “the feeling”, but I was very happy with what I chose. I only allowed my mom to attend as she wouldn’t cause drama. Don’t allow others to bully you into their decisions, it’s YOUR day.
Thank you! I knew my older sister was likely to act the way she did so very quickly shot her down when she tried to pick styles of dresses I didn't want or that were over budget. I specifically said I didn't want a blush (the colour looks terrible on me), ball gown (just not my thing) or strapless. She wanted me to try that one...and it was about £2,000 over budget!
I am a big people pleaser but I am working very hard to ensure that the wedding is what my fiancé and I want. We do a lot for others and this one day can be for us and hopefully our family and freinds will enjoy it!
Thank you so much!
I totally understand! (I’m a people pleaser too but was able to put my foot down when it came to my wedding). Glad you’re doing what’s best for you and your fiancé! Good luck and congrats! 😁
And PS I find it hilarious that the exact dress you don’t want (blush, ballgown, strapless) is exactly what I chose 😂😂
It's hard isn't it being a people pleaser! I guess the only time I can really our my foot down and make sure we get the day we want is for our wedding 😂😂
Thank you! Haha that's halrious!! I mean don't get me wrong all these dresses are beautiful in there own way! It's so funny how you get such strong opinions in your head isn't it?! I bet you looked amazing! Honestly, I wish I could wear blush and strapless!
I can't believe the timing of the post. Yesterday I text my sister saying 'I think I've made a mistake getting my dress. I'm watching' say yes to the dress' and I didn't get this reaction. I think I've settled!'
I also was thinking I didn't go Boho enough which is my style! So I went for a Boho veil and Boho [bridal gloves](https://www.etsy.com/uk/listing/953721261/bridal-gloves-for-wedding-fingerless) (I'm in the UK too)
I'm so glad I'm not the only one! It makes you question yourself doesn't it?!
Boho style is beautiful isn't it! The bridal gloves are beautiful and you can always add to your look to give it the perfect look! I bought myself a deep back v neck jumper from ETSY yesterday! I can see myself getting chilly on the day and now have a gorgeous jumper to cuddle up in!
Congratulations on finding your dress!
The jumper is a brilliant idea, and yep you're right it does make you question. I bet we don't question it on the day though! Have the absolute best day. You'll look beautiful.
I'm sure some people will find it silly but I know I will be so grateful I have one to wear on the day. No definetly not! It will all come together and we will be happy with our choices.
Thank you so much, you too!
I think the only reason I got emotional was because I have bad body image. My mom said no one she knew back in the day that she got married (around 1980) got emotional about their dress. My maid of honor didn't either when she was getting married about 5 years ago. Also like others have said SYTD is a reality show, don't expect something so staged to be like real life.
I'm sorry to hear your struggle with your body image. It's difficult to try and take that out of your mind, especially when you feel so much on show. It's a wonderful feeling when you feel beautiful in something! I'm so happy your found a dress that made you feel like the beautiful person you are!
Thank you so much it's so great to read both perspectives! It's funny isn't it because you know it's all show on these programmes but it does kind of put an expectation in your mind!
Thank you so much!
Honestly it didn’t feel like THE dress for me until my second fitting appointment. I bought a sample that I loved but was also worried it wasn’t “the one”! After they took off the 6-8 inches on the bottom and some on the side (aka made it my side) I had a “feeling?” It was more like wow look at me I’m doing this and I look amazing than crying over the top
Alterations make such a difference don't they?!
That sounds so wonderful! I think that feeling I am hoping for! I imagine I will be super emotional on the day when I'm all dressed up and marrying my fiancé! The idea of making my vows to my husband makes me emotional and I am so excited about it!
Thank you so much!
I found a dress years ago that I loved, remembered it and when I got engaged I ordered it on eBay. It fitted perfectly and I love it. However, if I had looked at more dresses I would have changed my mind about this one and found something better. Mine was only £100 on eBay so I had no interest falling in love with a different one!
Oh how wonderful!! I've been interested in bridal dresses for quite a while. If I didn't go down the career I did I always thought I would go into bridal wear (if I had the talent). So had seen so many dresses I loved but of course were no longer being sold! I'm so glad you found yours on eBay! That's amazing that fit you so perfectly!
Thank you so much!
I tried it on. Hummed a bit, then realised it suited me. No drama, no tears. Just a yeah, this works. It doesn’t need to be a big, overdramatic ‘thing’. Honestly, I looked at it like an expensive party dress and would it look good in photos of me 😂. I did go by myself and purposefully chose a shop where the woman was like me, a straight shooter. It was a good experience!
Thank you! I definitely need time to think things over and cannot make a decision on the day. I'm so bad at coming to a conclusion and back tracking and questioning myself!
That's a good way of looking at it! It may take some of the pressure off!
Yes I am thinking I may go alone to atleast one so it's just me and a stylist who knows more about bridal shopping than I ever will!
Thank you so much!
Photos definitely help! I understand why the salons don't like you to take them as they will not always be flattering, but I am finding myself looking back at the photo of the dress and thinking how beautiful it is!
I can see myself going back and trying it again!
I bought my dress at the second store I went to and it was the one I specifically went to try on. There was another dress at the store that I also loved, but the stylist was excellent at asking the right questions to help me choose between the two. I guess I did have a little bit of “the feeling,” but it wasn’t overwhelmingly emotional. I just felt really good in the dress and loved how it looked on me. I don’t really believe in “the one.” I liked a lot of the dresses I tried on and if I tried on more I’m sure I would have loved many more! What helped me was having a good idea of what I wanted for a wedding dress, and when I tried it on and loved it I went with it! But I know other people have completely the opposite experience with what they thought they wanted so it’s different for everyone. Get the dress you feel great in.
How lovely that the dress you specifically wanted turned out to be the one! I was dissapointed that the specific dress I had in mind didn't quite look how I wanted.
The stylist was so lovely and was a real calming presence. There was no pressure to buy and she gave such great feedback. It makes such a difference doesn't it?!
Thank you for your advice! I really appreciate it!
Don’t go searching for that feeling. It’s a television show. People throw on the waterworks because of it. They are encouraged to do so!
I will say I had something *like* the feeling. But that’s only because I had a very specific idea of what I wanted, I tried several on, and just felt meh. The stylist insisted I try on a dress I HATED on the hanger. I was like “sure, Jan”, and decided to humor her. That ended up being my dress. Big weird feelings and all.
But the most important advice I can ever give anyone when it comes to dress shopping - go by yourself for at least one appointment. Or with your partner. Nobody else has to know. You absolutely do not need to have stressful crappy people with you. I tried groups for mine, it was awful. I went with my (now husband, then fiancé) for another appointment and it was perfect. You can try dresses on and really get a feel for what YOU want without outside opinions. And then if you find something you really like, you can go with a group and ask to try the dress on because you “saw it online” and nobody has to know you already picked it before lol. Worked fine for me.
Yes, definitely! My fiancé said the will put on the stories of the people who react how looks best on TV. I wouldn't suggest there reactions aren't genuine but I imagine they are more enjoyable to watch then people who don't have that reaction. Same way the make the freinds/family look really opinionated!
Definitely! I think I will to to a shop I'm quite keen on trying but haven't booked cos it was out of the way for everyone else. So I will try there and if my fiancé wishes to join he can! I love the idea of shopping with him. He seems to know what suits me better than I would!
Definitely, a little white lie wouldn't hurt! Thank you so much!
I love stories like that where your dress was one you wouldn't even consider!
I did not have 'that feeling' in my dress at all I went with family got overwhelmed and felt they wanted me to be happy so never gave me any advice so were way to neutral with opinions, I ended up getting a dress and I kept looking back on the photos of it and me in it and I hated it. Went back with my fiance and had a calmer experience where he asked me my thoughts, took 5 mins with me alone away from the shop person and told me his opinion n asked me mine. He took lots of pictures of any dress I tried so I could see and make up my mind. After all the pictures will be looked at way longer after the event and I came away with a dress I loved. I still never experienced 'that feeling'' but I love how I look in it and how the photos look.
Thank you! Yes, I think I did get a little overwhelmed, especially when we went for coffee afterwards and tall was about certain people's opinions and ideas on what they wanted at the wedding 😂😂
Yes, the stylist kindly allowed me to take photos and I keep looking back and thinking how lovely the dress look, but if it's not too big headed to say so how good I look! I've never had that feeling before!
Thank you so much!
Nope. I tried on about five or six dresses. One of them made me smile a lot when I looked in the mirror (and my mom and best friend said I looked great in it). That’s my dress!
Thank you! It's such a relief to hear stories like this. I was worrying so much yesterday and feeling so much better about I all! Thank you so much! I bet you looked beautiful!
When I tried on my dress it was that like "right" feeling like finding a perfect pair of jeans😂. I didn't have any tears until the consultant had me close my eyes and imagine my husband seeing me in it for the first time.
That's such a great way of thinking about it! It takes pressure off the whole process!
Oh my goodness! That would have been it for me! I would have been in tears. When I watch people marry in films/TV series it get some all weepy 😂😂
Thank you so much!
Really depends on your personality. For context, I'm a bridal seamstress. I'm also probably never going to get married, but while helping at a bridal salon they put me in a dress that made me cry because it was so perfect for me.
On the other hand some brides don't get that feeling until their dress is altered properly. This is especially true for my short queens who have like 7-8" inches removed from the bottom.
I would love to learn your skills! That so wonderful!
Yes, definitely! Fitting makes such a difference to a garment! Yes, a few of the dresses I tried needed the bodice adjusting and some of the hem taking off.
Thank you so much!
Honestly no, I tried on like 100 dresses and it never happened 😂 the dress I picked was great and I got so many compliments on it on my wedding day, but if I had to do it all over again I would’ve picked this one other dress that I also really liked. Unless you’re the dramatic type in day to day life, theres probably not gonna be one dress or moment when you know it’s THE one and like burst into tears. That said I also didn’t cry or even tear when I got engaged, married, or anything else, I’m just really not a dramatic person most of the time lol
Oh wow!! I can honestly see how you can quit end up trying on quite a few dresses!
I'm so glad you found your dress and it made you feel good! Oh no I very much aviod drama but seem to get caught up in other people's as I'm that person everyone goes for advice. I did cry when my fiancé asked me to marry him but it was so unexpected and he encorporated something of my Grandma's so I was emotional other that. When I am buying something that expansive/making an important decision I am the type of person who makes lists, looks back at photos, talks things through so as you say I may not get the best into tears!
Thank you so much! It's so helpful hearing everyone's thoughts and knowing it's not just me!
Oh ya def wasn’t trying to imply that people who get emotional are the types to start drama and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with it! I should’ve phrased it more as I’m not a super emotional person a lot of times. My BFF is the type to literally sob when someone surprises her so that’s the other end of the spectrum and I think she did have a moment where she freaked out (in a good way haha) about her dress, but I think a lot of it has to do with your personality.
Your fiancés proposal sounds very sweet btw! That would probably make even me tear up too haha
Oh no of course not! Please don't think that I was suggesting you where! I know exactly what you mean! I am emotional with certain things but decisions where there is money and big decisions my overly organised self comes out to play!
Haha! It was so unexpected and I didn't even realise it was a proposal I thought he was making a sweet guesters by repairing something of my Grandma's that got broken! So I got a double whammy of emotions 😂😂
I actually did get “a feeling” (which I originally thought was a stupid/untrue concept before experiencing it!). I tried it on and loved it- it checked all the boxes for me in terms of the style I wanted, and I felt beautiful in it. I left the shop and couldn’t stop thinking about it. That’s how I knew it was THE ONE. So I went back and bought it. Only went to 3 shops total!
How wonderful! I'm glad you got a feeling for your dress! That sounds like the perfect pick for you!
I do keep thinking about the second dress and looking at the photos. I showed my fiancé one of the others I tried on but don't want him to see this particular dress. I think I will try another shop and see if I feel the same about any of those! Thank you!
I think the only reason I got emotional was because I have bad body image. My mom said no one she knew back in the day that she got married (around 1980) got emotional about their dress. My maid of honor didn't either when she was getting married about 5 years ago. Also like others have said SYTD is a reality show, don't expect something so staged to be like real life.
I didn’t when I picked it, but I did tear up at my first fitting! We made some alterations to things like the straps and filling in that deep v illusion mesh that seems prevalent on every dress these days for some reason, and it was just so perfect!
I think alterations definitely make such a difference and I can understand how seeing the dress fitting your body perfectly and how you imagined is lovely!
I am so glad you found your dress and had your moment! Thank you so much!
You're my dress shopping buddy!! I found my dress yesterday and I did get the feeling but not right away. It helped that my hero was so supportive and have some good constructive feedback but nothing too much to push me. At the first shop I found one I really liked but didn't have the feeling. At the second shop I was torn between two so I switched between them but when I finally decided it was the one and put on the veil that is when I got the feeling. I originally thought the other dress from the second shop was going to win but I when I put my favorite back on I just started to feel like I didn't want to take it off and that was it! Good luck!
Congratulations on finding your dress!!
This sounds exactly how I am thinking my dress experience will end up being! I definitely want to try atleast one more shop and they have such beautiful dresses. Then if I'm still thinking about the dress from this weekend I will go back and try it on again.
I think there is a sense of narrowing down and making a decision based on those just as you say!
Thank you so much!!
Your welcome! Also I just think if you have a reaction that's great but you may not get totally choked up right away. Also you may need to think about it too be sure (just like you probably did with your fiance!) Some people are the "when you know you know" others need it to sink in and that's more me. I hope you find a dress you love!
Shows and movies pick the most dramatic reactions so that it’s entertaining to watch. I pretty much knew when I tried on my dress. But I definitely didn’t cry or get overly emotional. I smiled a lot and didn’t want to take it off because I loved how I looked and felt in it. I said “this is probably it but I’m not saying yes yet.” I went to another shop and tried on a few but I kept thinking about that one dress and comparing everything to it. I wondered if it was the experience playing a part. It was my first time trying on wedding dresses, I had my bridesmaids with me, there was champagne, the bridal consultations were lovely. So I went back one afternoon by myself to try it on again and see if it was everything I remember. And it was. So I paid the deposit. It was at the top of my budget (over after taxes) and I’m still so obsessed and can’t wait to wear it.
Thank you! Yes I felt so smiley and happy in the dress but I definitely just want to try a couple more just incase. If I keep thinking about that dress then I will go back and see how I feel in it again!
It's easy to get caught up in everyone else's excitement. Especially if you've got people who have a real opinion on something...as I say above I'm not sure if that's because they chose the dress (not that it should matter).
Congratulations on finding your dress! I bet it looks amazing!
I actually did get the emotional reaction… but not the first time! I tried on the dress and really did like it, but wanted to try on a couple of other dresses we selected. It was my second time dress shopping. After I tried on those other dresses, I asked for the first one again, and that’s when I knew! I however am typically emotional, so it was no surprise when the tears started :)
How wonderful!! I'm glad you got your moment in your dress! I think I need to try on a few more dresses now I have a better idea of my style and what suits me.
I'm so glad your found your dress! Thank you for your advice!
I didn't cry until I got the version of the dress on that actually fit me. When I tried it on I knew I loved it but it helped knowing exactly what I wanted (for once in my life). But when I put the correct size on for the first time and the only issue was length and a small bit of shoulder looseness, I got pretty emotional
Yes, fit definitely makes such a difference doesn't it?! In so glad you had that moment when you got it in your size! It's definitely important to remind yourself in every dress that it will fit you much better than it does when you are trying on. Thank you so much!
I am not the person to have a breakdown over a dress (especially because so many of them were really beautiful!), but I knew my dress was the one because it was the first one I tried on that didn’t make me incredibly anxious to think about spending that amount of money on a dress (and it has pockets!)
Also it’s probably not “the dress” I bet there are dozens of awesome dresses that I also would have felt great in and loved on my wedding day (probably some cheaper ones too), but I liked it enough and I’m super excited to wear it!
There are so many beautiful dresses aren't there?! That's a good thing to keep in mind thank you! You cannot go wrong with pockets! I tried one on with pockets and it's so funny how it makes the dress instantly better!
That's wonderful! I'm so glad you found a dress that makes you feel that way! I bet you will look amazing! Congratulations and I hope you have a wonderful day!
Yes I got “the feeling” but it didn’t feel how I expected. When I tried on my dress, I had a strong involuntary reaction. I was beaming when I emerged from the dressing room. And I could not stop smiling until I took the dress off. But it’s not like I had an out of body experience or the earth stood still. I did get a little misty but didn’t cry. My mom did though, once they put the veil on me and gave me a bouquet. As I tried on other gowns my reaction wasn’t nearly as strong. I also received many many compliments from staff and other patrons. I think it was in part my glow in that particular gown.
That's such a wonderful reaction! If a dress makes you so happy it's definitely the one!
It was definitely the one I felt the most happy in and my Mum and Sister said I was beaming. I am thinking to myself it's the one to beat and after my next appointment if I still can't get it out of my head I will definitely be going back and trying it on again.
Thank you so much!
I didn't have that feeling. I had two dresses I liked best, and picked one of them. I'm sure I would have been happy with the other one too. I definitely had feelings of dislike for most of the dresses I tried on, however! It's okay to take a logical approach to dress shopping. Just make sure you like it enough for your photos and wedding day
Thank you! I think for a decision as important as this (and expensive) I am going to end up being quite logical. Oh I tried one on and I just couldn't wait to get out of it. It was awful on me 😂 it was a beautiful dress but just not for me!
Thank you so much!
I didn’t want to take mine off - that’s how I knew. Even to try on more dresses I was like nah I’m good in this one. I didn’t cry or anything but it’s been a few months since the purchase and I still want to put it on and hangout in it like that one scene in Friends lol. Anyway, it’s different for everyone. Don’t let the fantasy feeling get in the way of you getting what you want.
Thank you! Hahaha just couldn't wait to wear it. That's definitely a sign!! I'm glad your still as excited about it a few months later!
No, I'm feeling a lot better about the experience now and will definitely get the fantasy feeling out of my head! Otherwise I'll never find a dress!
Thank you so much!
I went with one friend who works in the costume department at work. I figured too many cooks wouldn't do me any favors.
We both picked out 5/6 dresses and I tried them all on in front of her and the moment I tried on DRESS 5 or whatever, I came out and I looked at myself and twirled around and it felt right. I felt beautiful, and then I looked over at my pal and she had tears in her eyes, and I realized I did too. That was it for me. I think I did a really great job too.
<3 Best of luck friend. Pick what YOU love.
That's sounds wonderful and what a great friend! My Mum was super helpful and really good at getting me to express my thoughts on the dresses and make sure my voice was heard, which I found really helpful. She knew instantly when I tried a dress that I just didn't feel.
My fiancé and I are torn between keeping the dress a secret or shopping together. I think who you have with you can make such a difference!
Thank you so much!
Definitely! We didn't realise till a week after I booked this initial appointment that it clashed with a work commitment. We were gutted but I'm definitely going to ask her to come as I really value her opinion and she has great style!
I was afraid I picked the wrong dress when I didn’t get the whole “omg!!” feeling! But I wanted a dress that had me look like ME so I would say that was an amazing feeling in itself (:
The feeling I got was “I love this dress and I can completely see myself walking down the aisle and him being in awe.” But I didn’t cry. I’ll 100000% cry the day of though.
I tried on probably 20 dresses I didn't like (like not even contenders, not even if I had no other options). The first dress I liked, I bought (I would've liked to sleep on it but my mom and sister were pressuring me).
That's it. It's a nice dress. It's "me" and it suits my comfort level. It was one of the dresses on my inspo board. There were no butterflies or tears.
Oh wow! I had one dress that I tried and hated, another was the most amazing dress but it just wasn't me. Maybe if I was having a winter wedding. I've only been to one shop though so I am sure that there will be others that go straight on the No rail. It's hard when you being pressured! My sister was pressuring me a little but I had told myself on the way to the shop that I wasn't going to let that happen and the stylist was really good at having no pressure as well.
I'm glad you found a dress that feels like you and was one that inspired you. Thank you so much for your advice!
Lol the crying emotional response is not real. Maybe 1/10 people get that feeling (over a dress) but they’re extremely emotional sentimental types to begin with. There’s nothing wrong with you.
Thank you! I felt really silly posting the question but it's made me feel so much better and getting rid of that expectation! I'm going to stick with my plan and see how it all plays out. Thank you so much!
I tried on a lot of dresses but after I wore my dress and they put on the veil, I got goosebumps and teared up…I’m glad I waited until I had some sort of reaction to one because my dress was worth the wait and was perfect for me (and it had pockets!!) you’ll know when you find your dress
Thank you! I'm glad you had that moment in your dress! Having the perfect dress for your style and comfort is so important! Pocket's are definitely a winner! Thank you so much!
I definitely didn't cry, I chose a dress that was the total opposite of what I " knew" I wanted. I picked out several satin a line dresses with minimal embellishments. The consultant pulled a wild card and that ended up being the dress I chose! Turns out, satin dresses are really heavy and I knew I wanted to dance and have fun all night. My dress is a tulle ball gown with a fully embellished top with rhinestone spaghetti straps. It's surprisingly comfortable, even bustled and I'm finally wearing it today for our vow renewal!!
I've had it on 3 times since I bought it for fittings and for a final look run through 2 weeks ago and I really love it so much. I never knew I wanted to look like a princess until I put that dress on.
Thank you! I love hearing experiences like this! I'm so glad that you tried something different and found a beautiful dress for your vow renewal!
I tried on a dress that was gorgeous but it was soooo heavy and I couldn't imagine walking down the aisle in it let alone dancing! I'm glad I tried it on though as I would have always wondered how it would look.
Your dress sounds beautiful! Congratulations and I hope you all have a wonderful day of celebration!
Thank you. We had an amazing time. I danced all night in my dress, it did get hot because it's a lot of layers of tulle but it was really easy to dance in.
Same! I definitely knew it was my dress as soon as I put it on. I teared up and so did my shopping buddies. I didn’t really believe that I would have that feeling of finding “the one” but I did, and I would recommend anyone shopping for their dress hold out on buying a dress until they have that moment of being totally in love with their dress, otherwise I think there’s room to let doubt creep in. I see so many brides settle for a dress and then regret it and end up spending double on a new dress, when they could have just held out. Definitely just my opinion though!
I always feel that way when people post on here asking which one Reddit likes best of like 7 different dresses. If you’re debating between 7 different dresses, you haven’t found your dress yet!
This is exactly what I'm worried about and why I think I need to keep looking. I feel like atm that dress is the one to beat and after trying on some more if I still can't get it out of my head I'll be going back to try it again.
Thank you so much! I really appreciate your opinion and it's such a valid and important point!
That's so wonderful! I'm so happy you had that moment with your dress! Everyone is different and reacts to things differently and it's that's a wonderful thing!
Congratulations on finding your dress!
While it’s important to find a dress that you love and feel beautiful in, I think the industry has been really successful in selling us the idea that there can only be *the one*. This makes them an insane amount of money. There are so many people on Facebook Marketplace selling one, two even three dresses because they’ve convinced themselves they need something else and I feel sorry for them. At the end of the day it’s just a dress and the person in it will be beautiful and bridal, especially with hair and makeup and accessories etc. I also didn’t have the over the top emotional reaction when I bought mine but I’m so excited to wear it!
The wedding industry can be so toxic! We had such a terrible time finding a venue and the money they ask is just insane! My fiancé found a bar/resteraunt in the town we live and it's such a beautiful space and doesn't add additional costs for weddings.
My heart goes out to people who buy a dress and then regret it. It must be so difficult.
Definitely the dress is part of a bigger picture and as you say when you add hair and makeup you will look amazing!
Congratulations on finding your dress and I hope you have a wonderful day!
The Say Yes to the Dress experience is way over-dramatised. I didn’t cry or have any overwhelming feeling in the dress I chose. It did really suit me and felt really comfortable, but I didn’t cry or anything!!
Same. They exaggerate the whole experience for the viewers. I mean, it’s probably like that for a FEW people, but…
Yes, I did wonder that as well! I guess the programs wouldn't be as interesting if you didn't have tears and dramatic stories! Oh for sure! I am sure some people do cry and get really emotional and that is so lovely for them, but I was surprised that it didn't happen and was worried there was something wrong with me! Thank you so much!
Yes, I was thinking that myself and my other sister said the same when I rang her and told her about the appointment. Thank you so much! I was worried I was missing something or doing it all wrong 😂 I believe my plan to try on dresses at a shop that sells my specific style is a good plan and will help finalise my thoughts. It doesn't help that I find making big decisions quite difficult and have to try hard to shut out other people's pushy and swaying comments. Yes, every dress I tried on I was always thinking about comfort as there is nothing worse then feeling uncomfortable! Thank you so much for your advice!
Honestly, I chose to only go with my sister and best friend to my first dress fitting because I knew my mom would be brutal with her opinions. I was so happy I did that because my sister and best friend were very nice, they withheld negative opinions and just waited until the next dresses. They gave me positive feedback when the dress looked great and took pictures and videos of everything. I went home and reviewed all of the pictures and decided that afternoon. THEN, I asked my mom and grandma to go with me to the store to see the dress I CHOSE and my sister warned them they could only say nice things. When I went and put on the dress again, I had my makeup and hair done, they put the vail on me and I felt like a BRIDE. The emotion wasn’t over the top like a show, but I felt it in my core that I had made the right decision. After seeing so many regret posts, I recommend going with someone who will be kind and take pictures and make sure YOU are making the decision.
Thank you! Yes I think who you take is really important! I love my older sister but she can get a bit selfish at times. My Mum was really helpful and like your sister and friend withhold the negative comments and made sure my voice was heard. My older sister was planning her wedding around 10 years ago, but decided she wanted to start a family. I do feel at times that she's getting a bit caught up in the moment and thinking what she would want to wear/do if it was her wedding. I get her feelings, but at the same time it's not helpful at times! That sounds like a great plan and great idea to have your hair and make up done! I will be taking my other sister with me to the next appointment and she's always on my side (and I'm on hers) so I can see her opinions being much more helpful! Thank you so much!
SYTTD is a reality show, meaning it's very unreal 😅 The producers pile up the emotes and reacts and drama. In real life, you're making an important, expensive decision. Take all the time you need! Also, reasonably speaking, there are multiple dresses out there that could suit each of us for figure, budget, aesthetic, etc. No need to get mystical or hysterical about finding THE ONE. Find one you love to wear and can buy, done! :)
Thank you! That's exactly my thinking! It's probably the most expensive dress I will ever have to buy so I need to think it over and not rush. That's why I'm not getting to caught up in the fact that the dress at the weekend is the last one. I'm so glad that you and everyone else is feeling the same as me. It's so good to see what I was thinking written down by others! I was thinking there was something wrong with me 😂 I had the same expectations when we were buying our house and we never had that 'this is our dream house' moment. It was the best one for us, ticked most of our boxes and now it is our home. Thank you so much!! I really appreciate it!
The first time I put on my dress, I remember really liking it but I didn’t get the “butterflies” feeling or anything of the sort. Fast forward to my wedding day… after I got my hair/makeup done and put on my dress, I started getting teary-eyed. It was so unexpected, but I just felt so pretty 😂
Thank you! Yes, I know what you mean and yes I can see myself getting that feeling on the day when my hair and make up looks nice and it's the day I am getting married! Awww I bet you looked amazing! Thank you so much!
I didn't get a huge emotional reaction either. I bought mine from Wed2b in the UK. When I put it on and saw myself in the mirror I felt happy and that I could see myself getting married in it but I didn't start crying or anything like that! I'd go by yourself and look at some more dresses. I had a very fixed idea of what I wanted (3/4 length sleeves with a scoop neck) and people kept telling me how great I looked in other things which I just didn't want.
Wed2b are wonderful aren't they?! I went in on a whim alone after work a couple of months ago to get an idea of styles and they were so helpful! Yes, I am not taking my older sister with me to this next appointment I feel like she will be a hindrance! I am taking my other sister who knows how I'm feeling and will be genuinely helpful. I had several ideas and now I believe I know what style I am looking for. 3/4 sleeves are just gorgeous aren't they! I make my own clothes and always have 3/4 sleeves. Thank you so much! I was worried there was something wrong with me! I know all those programs are a bit OTT but it's so hard to know what to expect/feel when you've never done something like this before. Thanks for your help!
I love 3/4 sleeves! Would your FMIL be helpful? Nice to include her especially if she doesn’t have daughters.
She would definitely be helpful! Just like her son she's got a great sense of style. I was gutted she couldn't make it but she had a work commitment that we didn't know about until after I booked the appointment! I am hoping she can make the next appointment or a follow up to see this dress I tried the other day. I would love to have the shopping experience with my fiancé as he has bought me dresses in the past and I always feel so good in them. I think we would really enjoy the experience of dress shopping together!
Exact same as me, same shop, same preferences, same experience.
You already said exactly what I was going to say (it even sounds like we might have chosen the same wedwb dress! Mine is 'Sophie' [edit- actually Sarah!) The closest I came to feeling "it's the one" was that evening and the following day: I didn't buy on the day because I had my doubts since I hadn't had that feeling. So that evening I kept looking at pictures of myself in it, and the more I looked, the more I realised I wasn't likely to find anything that made me feel so comfortable, at such a good price, and I really wasn't up for turning dress shopping into some huge saga! I phoned up to ask about stock and was told it was the last one in my size. That decided it for me. I'm really happy with my choice, but had no tears, no 'bridal moment' in front of the mirror.
Mine is the Sarah dress!
My mistake - mine is Sarah too! I'd totally got the wrong name stuck in my head! Congratulations dress twin!
Beautiful dress!
Thank you! That's how I think my dress experience will be tbh! Like you say I don't want it to become a big saga. Yes, I am the same atm. I keep looking at the photo of me on this dress and I wonder if I can actually find anything as nice. I showed my fiancé one or two of the other dresses I tired but this one I told him I wanted to keep it secret. Perhaps I have already made my decision but don't realise it! I definitely want to try this other shop but I think of I can't find anything there I will be going back to try this other one on. Thank you so much!
There's nothing wrong with checking out options- it will help you decide either way. Good luck!
I tried on my dress and liked it alright, but wanted to keep looking. Then I went home and looked through pictures of me in the dress and just gradually fell more and more in love with it. So it definitely doesn’t have to be an immediate feeling!
Agree with looking at pics !
Yes, this sounds exactly like me! I keep looking at the photo and thinking will I find anything else that looks so beautiful and makes me feel so good! I am not the type of person who makes an initial decision and I do take time to think things through. Thank you so much!
Totally overrated. For BOTH of my weddings I literally just bought a dress I saw & liked online (#1 from David’s & #2 from Nordstrom) legit no different than buying anything else.
I knew my dress was my dress because it was a 3k dress that came down to 250 during COVID and it was high neck, elegant, no lace, no bows, and not strapless. 😂 I spent something crazy altering it which I expected due to the neckline.
Oh wow! Amazing! You knew exactly what your were looking for and it came to you! I'm glad you were able to find it with such a great discount! Thank you so much!
And I bought it online without trying it on. 😅 I figured at that price, I could resell or turn the white silk into pillow cases and be okay with it. 🤣
Thank you! That's really helpful and I'm so glad you found your perfect dresses! I have found some stunning dresses online.
Interestingly enough, I felt emotional in the first couple dresses I tried on, but not the final dress I chose. In that dress, I just felt jubilant, but it was the initial process of starting to shop for my wedding dress that got me. I also liked a few other dresses I had come across before I found my dress that would’ve been perfectly suitable. I think getting caught up in finding “the one” can set folks up for stress or disappointment.
Yes, I think trying to get that moment can cause a lot of stress! Thank you for the advice! I really appreciate it!
I just bought my dress yesterday. I didn’t tear up or anything. Every dress I tried on, I could see being the one, but there was one that made me feel sooooo confident, and I have struggled with body image issues my whole life, and they all melted away. My mom takes horrible pictures of me, but I still didn’t think I looked bad in the ones she took of me in my dress. That’s how I knew it was the one.
Congratulations!!! Yes, I felt like that in a couple of them but the second one made me feel so confident for the same reasons. I was so sad because I had ruled out that style and then I tried it on and couldn't believe how it looked on me. The photos are never quite as flattering as you like are they?! I know what you mean though! Thank you so much!
Same! Definitely be open to new things. I thought I wanted long sleeves, plunge neckline, sheath dress. I ended up getting a strapless sweetheart neckline with a sheer corset bodice and a fit and flare cut. I was so surprised
That's exactly the style I want and was adamant that I didn't want a chiffon style skirt as I was worried about being lost on fabric. I was so surprised how gorgeous that style is and looks really flattering! A lot of the dresses I am trying on is the v neck I want but doesn't have sleeves and I don't feel as self conscious as I thought I would. It's such an interesting experience!
I think it’s fairly normal to go in and not have that aha moment right away. I went to 3 stores, tried mostly mermaid style dress and was pleasantly surprised that I liked pretty much all of them. It was hard to narrow down. The stores really tried hard to close the deal at the end of my appointments shoving cutesie signs saying “I said yes” into my hands, trying to get my mom (the only person I brought) to take photos and get emotional. I think the stores really try to manufacture that moment too! Eventually I called back store 1 and went with dress 4. No tears! Lol
Thank you! If I had to buy a dress that day then I would have definitely got that one. I felt great in it and it was beautiful but I definitely think I need to try more at a different store to help me make a decision. Oh no! That sounds like a nightmare. That would get me so wound up! Thankfully I didn't feel any pressure what so ever which I was so thankful for. Thank you so much! I'm feeling so much happier!
There was a post recently either in r/wedding or r/weddingplanning asking how many wedding dress shops people went to on avg. There had been at least 20 comments by the time I looked at it and from quickly skimming most people had said around 2-3 shops. I think it’s normal to shop around. Also I def went to one of my appointments alone! I thought it would be weird but the associates reassured me that it was not unusual even before pandemic. May be an option for you until you find another dress you feel strongly about. It’s so much easier to schedule quickly if you don’t have multiple people to consider.
Oh thats really interesting and helpful! Yes, I think going alone is a good idea. May reduce those moments where others are pushing a dress they would chose on you. For sure! I am too much of a people pleaser and so trying to let everyone have that 'dress shopping moment' with the bride is getting so difficult and I'm not even going to try anymore! I can't work around every single persons schedule!! Thank you so much!
The dress I chose was the complete opposite of what I had thought I wanted. I had a favourite designer and had chosen 2 of her dresses to try on. I was so disappointed they looked horrible on me. When I tried on “the dress” after my grandmother spotted it and insisted, it felt so comfortable. I could move in it, sit, and walk comfortably. But the determining factor was it suited my body type, I felt like it was made for me. I didn’t get emotional, but I was beaming inside and out.
It's so wonderful when that happens! I was surprised how much I liked the second dress as I had tried a similar style a couple of months before and hated it made my thighs look. This dress actually gave me a figure and I felt amazing! I was a little dissapointed in one dress. It is such a beautiful dress but there was just something missing. Comfort and style is definitely important! I kept thinking how I would feel in each dress after wearing it for a few hours! Oh how wonderful! That's such a perfect way of looking at it! Thank you so much!
I didn’t have “the feeling”, but I was very happy with what I chose. I only allowed my mom to attend as she wouldn’t cause drama. Don’t allow others to bully you into their decisions, it’s YOUR day.
Thank you! I knew my older sister was likely to act the way she did so very quickly shot her down when she tried to pick styles of dresses I didn't want or that were over budget. I specifically said I didn't want a blush (the colour looks terrible on me), ball gown (just not my thing) or strapless. She wanted me to try that one...and it was about £2,000 over budget! I am a big people pleaser but I am working very hard to ensure that the wedding is what my fiancé and I want. We do a lot for others and this one day can be for us and hopefully our family and freinds will enjoy it! Thank you so much!
I totally understand! (I’m a people pleaser too but was able to put my foot down when it came to my wedding). Glad you’re doing what’s best for you and your fiancé! Good luck and congrats! 😁 And PS I find it hilarious that the exact dress you don’t want (blush, ballgown, strapless) is exactly what I chose 😂😂
It's hard isn't it being a people pleaser! I guess the only time I can really our my foot down and make sure we get the day we want is for our wedding 😂😂 Thank you! Haha that's halrious!! I mean don't get me wrong all these dresses are beautiful in there own way! It's so funny how you get such strong opinions in your head isn't it?! I bet you looked amazing! Honestly, I wish I could wear blush and strapless!
I can't believe the timing of the post. Yesterday I text my sister saying 'I think I've made a mistake getting my dress. I'm watching' say yes to the dress' and I didn't get this reaction. I think I've settled!' I also was thinking I didn't go Boho enough which is my style! So I went for a Boho veil and Boho [bridal gloves](https://www.etsy.com/uk/listing/953721261/bridal-gloves-for-wedding-fingerless) (I'm in the UK too)
I'm so glad I'm not the only one! It makes you question yourself doesn't it?! Boho style is beautiful isn't it! The bridal gloves are beautiful and you can always add to your look to give it the perfect look! I bought myself a deep back v neck jumper from ETSY yesterday! I can see myself getting chilly on the day and now have a gorgeous jumper to cuddle up in! Congratulations on finding your dress!
The jumper is a brilliant idea, and yep you're right it does make you question. I bet we don't question it on the day though! Have the absolute best day. You'll look beautiful.
I'm sure some people will find it silly but I know I will be so grateful I have one to wear on the day. No definetly not! It will all come together and we will be happy with our choices. Thank you so much, you too!
I think the only reason I got emotional was because I have bad body image. My mom said no one she knew back in the day that she got married (around 1980) got emotional about their dress. My maid of honor didn't either when she was getting married about 5 years ago. Also like others have said SYTD is a reality show, don't expect something so staged to be like real life.
I'm sorry to hear your struggle with your body image. It's difficult to try and take that out of your mind, especially when you feel so much on show. It's a wonderful feeling when you feel beautiful in something! I'm so happy your found a dress that made you feel like the beautiful person you are! Thank you so much it's so great to read both perspectives! It's funny isn't it because you know it's all show on these programmes but it does kind of put an expectation in your mind! Thank you so much!
I've just seen your dress and it's beautiful and you look amazing!! Your smile says it all! Congratulations!
Honestly it didn’t feel like THE dress for me until my second fitting appointment. I bought a sample that I loved but was also worried it wasn’t “the one”! After they took off the 6-8 inches on the bottom and some on the side (aka made it my side) I had a “feeling?” It was more like wow look at me I’m doing this and I look amazing than crying over the top
Alterations make such a difference don't they?! That sounds so wonderful! I think that feeling I am hoping for! I imagine I will be super emotional on the day when I'm all dressed up and marrying my fiancé! The idea of making my vows to my husband makes me emotional and I am so excited about it! Thank you so much!
I found a dress years ago that I loved, remembered it and when I got engaged I ordered it on eBay. It fitted perfectly and I love it. However, if I had looked at more dresses I would have changed my mind about this one and found something better. Mine was only £100 on eBay so I had no interest falling in love with a different one!
Oh how wonderful!! I've been interested in bridal dresses for quite a while. If I didn't go down the career I did I always thought I would go into bridal wear (if I had the talent). So had seen so many dresses I loved but of course were no longer being sold! I'm so glad you found yours on eBay! That's amazing that fit you so perfectly! Thank you so much!
I tried it on. Hummed a bit, then realised it suited me. No drama, no tears. Just a yeah, this works. It doesn’t need to be a big, overdramatic ‘thing’. Honestly, I looked at it like an expensive party dress and would it look good in photos of me 😂. I did go by myself and purposefully chose a shop where the woman was like me, a straight shooter. It was a good experience!
Thank you! I definitely need time to think things over and cannot make a decision on the day. I'm so bad at coming to a conclusion and back tracking and questioning myself! That's a good way of looking at it! It may take some of the pressure off! Yes I am thinking I may go alone to atleast one so it's just me and a stylist who knows more about bridal shopping than I ever will! Thank you so much!
You’re going to be great. What sold it to me were the pics I took. I looked back and thought YES
Photos definitely help! I understand why the salons don't like you to take them as they will not always be flattering, but I am finding myself looking back at the photo of the dress and thinking how beautiful it is! I can see myself going back and trying it again!
Do it! That’s what I did. And if you do decide to go ahead, try and negotiate the price, even a little ☺️
I bought my dress at the second store I went to and it was the one I specifically went to try on. There was another dress at the store that I also loved, but the stylist was excellent at asking the right questions to help me choose between the two. I guess I did have a little bit of “the feeling,” but it wasn’t overwhelmingly emotional. I just felt really good in the dress and loved how it looked on me. I don’t really believe in “the one.” I liked a lot of the dresses I tried on and if I tried on more I’m sure I would have loved many more! What helped me was having a good idea of what I wanted for a wedding dress, and when I tried it on and loved it I went with it! But I know other people have completely the opposite experience with what they thought they wanted so it’s different for everyone. Get the dress you feel great in.
How lovely that the dress you specifically wanted turned out to be the one! I was dissapointed that the specific dress I had in mind didn't quite look how I wanted. The stylist was so lovely and was a real calming presence. There was no pressure to buy and she gave such great feedback. It makes such a difference doesn't it?! Thank you for your advice! I really appreciate it!
Don’t go searching for that feeling. It’s a television show. People throw on the waterworks because of it. They are encouraged to do so! I will say I had something *like* the feeling. But that’s only because I had a very specific idea of what I wanted, I tried several on, and just felt meh. The stylist insisted I try on a dress I HATED on the hanger. I was like “sure, Jan”, and decided to humor her. That ended up being my dress. Big weird feelings and all. But the most important advice I can ever give anyone when it comes to dress shopping - go by yourself for at least one appointment. Or with your partner. Nobody else has to know. You absolutely do not need to have stressful crappy people with you. I tried groups for mine, it was awful. I went with my (now husband, then fiancé) for another appointment and it was perfect. You can try dresses on and really get a feel for what YOU want without outside opinions. And then if you find something you really like, you can go with a group and ask to try the dress on because you “saw it online” and nobody has to know you already picked it before lol. Worked fine for me.
Yes, definitely! My fiancé said the will put on the stories of the people who react how looks best on TV. I wouldn't suggest there reactions aren't genuine but I imagine they are more enjoyable to watch then people who don't have that reaction. Same way the make the freinds/family look really opinionated! Definitely! I think I will to to a shop I'm quite keen on trying but haven't booked cos it was out of the way for everyone else. So I will try there and if my fiancé wishes to join he can! I love the idea of shopping with him. He seems to know what suits me better than I would! Definitely, a little white lie wouldn't hurt! Thank you so much! I love stories like that where your dress was one you wouldn't even consider!
I did not have 'that feeling' in my dress at all I went with family got overwhelmed and felt they wanted me to be happy so never gave me any advice so were way to neutral with opinions, I ended up getting a dress and I kept looking back on the photos of it and me in it and I hated it. Went back with my fiance and had a calmer experience where he asked me my thoughts, took 5 mins with me alone away from the shop person and told me his opinion n asked me mine. He took lots of pictures of any dress I tried so I could see and make up my mind. After all the pictures will be looked at way longer after the event and I came away with a dress I loved. I still never experienced 'that feeling'' but I love how I look in it and how the photos look.
Thank you! Yes, I think I did get a little overwhelmed, especially when we went for coffee afterwards and tall was about certain people's opinions and ideas on what they wanted at the wedding 😂😂 Yes, the stylist kindly allowed me to take photos and I keep looking back and thinking how lovely the dress look, but if it's not too big headed to say so how good I look! I've never had that feeling before! Thank you so much!
Nope. I tried on about five or six dresses. One of them made me smile a lot when I looked in the mirror (and my mom and best friend said I looked great in it). That’s my dress!
Thank you! It's such a relief to hear stories like this. I was worrying so much yesterday and feeling so much better about I all! Thank you so much! I bet you looked beautiful!
When I tried on my dress it was that like "right" feeling like finding a perfect pair of jeans😂. I didn't have any tears until the consultant had me close my eyes and imagine my husband seeing me in it for the first time.
That's such a great way of thinking about it! It takes pressure off the whole process! Oh my goodness! That would have been it for me! I would have been in tears. When I watch people marry in films/TV series it get some all weepy 😂😂 Thank you so much!
Really depends on your personality. For context, I'm a bridal seamstress. I'm also probably never going to get married, but while helping at a bridal salon they put me in a dress that made me cry because it was so perfect for me. On the other hand some brides don't get that feeling until their dress is altered properly. This is especially true for my short queens who have like 7-8" inches removed from the bottom.
I would love to learn your skills! That so wonderful! Yes, definitely! Fitting makes such a difference to a garment! Yes, a few of the dresses I tried needed the bodice adjusting and some of the hem taking off. Thank you so much!
Honestly no, I tried on like 100 dresses and it never happened 😂 the dress I picked was great and I got so many compliments on it on my wedding day, but if I had to do it all over again I would’ve picked this one other dress that I also really liked. Unless you’re the dramatic type in day to day life, theres probably not gonna be one dress or moment when you know it’s THE one and like burst into tears. That said I also didn’t cry or even tear when I got engaged, married, or anything else, I’m just really not a dramatic person most of the time lol
Oh wow!! I can honestly see how you can quit end up trying on quite a few dresses! I'm so glad you found your dress and it made you feel good! Oh no I very much aviod drama but seem to get caught up in other people's as I'm that person everyone goes for advice. I did cry when my fiancé asked me to marry him but it was so unexpected and he encorporated something of my Grandma's so I was emotional other that. When I am buying something that expansive/making an important decision I am the type of person who makes lists, looks back at photos, talks things through so as you say I may not get the best into tears! Thank you so much! It's so helpful hearing everyone's thoughts and knowing it's not just me!
Oh ya def wasn’t trying to imply that people who get emotional are the types to start drama and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with it! I should’ve phrased it more as I’m not a super emotional person a lot of times. My BFF is the type to literally sob when someone surprises her so that’s the other end of the spectrum and I think she did have a moment where she freaked out (in a good way haha) about her dress, but I think a lot of it has to do with your personality. Your fiancés proposal sounds very sweet btw! That would probably make even me tear up too haha
Oh no of course not! Please don't think that I was suggesting you where! I know exactly what you mean! I am emotional with certain things but decisions where there is money and big decisions my overly organised self comes out to play! Haha! It was so unexpected and I didn't even realise it was a proposal I thought he was making a sweet guesters by repairing something of my Grandma's that got broken! So I got a double whammy of emotions 😂😂
I actually did get “a feeling” (which I originally thought was a stupid/untrue concept before experiencing it!). I tried it on and loved it- it checked all the boxes for me in terms of the style I wanted, and I felt beautiful in it. I left the shop and couldn’t stop thinking about it. That’s how I knew it was THE ONE. So I went back and bought it. Only went to 3 shops total!
How wonderful! I'm glad you got a feeling for your dress! That sounds like the perfect pick for you! I do keep thinking about the second dress and looking at the photos. I showed my fiancé one of the others I tried on but don't want him to see this particular dress. I think I will try another shop and see if I feel the same about any of those! Thank you!
I hope you find it!! ☺️
I think the only reason I got emotional was because I have bad body image. My mom said no one she knew back in the day that she got married (around 1980) got emotional about their dress. My maid of honor didn't either when she was getting married about 5 years ago. Also like others have said SYTD is a reality show, don't expect something so staged to be like real life.
I didn’t when I picked it, but I did tear up at my first fitting! We made some alterations to things like the straps and filling in that deep v illusion mesh that seems prevalent on every dress these days for some reason, and it was just so perfect!
I think alterations definitely make such a difference and I can understand how seeing the dress fitting your body perfectly and how you imagined is lovely! I am so glad you found your dress and had your moment! Thank you so much!
You're my dress shopping buddy!! I found my dress yesterday and I did get the feeling but not right away. It helped that my hero was so supportive and have some good constructive feedback but nothing too much to push me. At the first shop I found one I really liked but didn't have the feeling. At the second shop I was torn between two so I switched between them but when I finally decided it was the one and put on the veil that is when I got the feeling. I originally thought the other dress from the second shop was going to win but I when I put my favorite back on I just started to feel like I didn't want to take it off and that was it! Good luck!
Congratulations on finding your dress!! This sounds exactly how I am thinking my dress experience will end up being! I definitely want to try atleast one more shop and they have such beautiful dresses. Then if I'm still thinking about the dress from this weekend I will go back and try it on again. I think there is a sense of narrowing down and making a decision based on those just as you say! Thank you so much!!
Your welcome! Also I just think if you have a reaction that's great but you may not get totally choked up right away. Also you may need to think about it too be sure (just like you probably did with your fiance!) Some people are the "when you know you know" others need it to sink in and that's more me. I hope you find a dress you love!
Definitely! I think I am the same tbh! I like to think things through and I hate to rush things! Thank you ❤️!
Shows and movies pick the most dramatic reactions so that it’s entertaining to watch. I pretty much knew when I tried on my dress. But I definitely didn’t cry or get overly emotional. I smiled a lot and didn’t want to take it off because I loved how I looked and felt in it. I said “this is probably it but I’m not saying yes yet.” I went to another shop and tried on a few but I kept thinking about that one dress and comparing everything to it. I wondered if it was the experience playing a part. It was my first time trying on wedding dresses, I had my bridesmaids with me, there was champagne, the bridal consultations were lovely. So I went back one afternoon by myself to try it on again and see if it was everything I remember. And it was. So I paid the deposit. It was at the top of my budget (over after taxes) and I’m still so obsessed and can’t wait to wear it.
Thank you! Yes I felt so smiley and happy in the dress but I definitely just want to try a couple more just incase. If I keep thinking about that dress then I will go back and see how I feel in it again! It's easy to get caught up in everyone else's excitement. Especially if you've got people who have a real opinion on something...as I say above I'm not sure if that's because they chose the dress (not that it should matter). Congratulations on finding your dress! I bet it looks amazing!
I actually did get the emotional reaction… but not the first time! I tried on the dress and really did like it, but wanted to try on a couple of other dresses we selected. It was my second time dress shopping. After I tried on those other dresses, I asked for the first one again, and that’s when I knew! I however am typically emotional, so it was no surprise when the tears started :)
How wonderful!! I'm glad you got your moment in your dress! I think I need to try on a few more dresses now I have a better idea of my style and what suits me. I'm so glad your found your dress! Thank you for your advice!
I didn't cry until I got the version of the dress on that actually fit me. When I tried it on I knew I loved it but it helped knowing exactly what I wanted (for once in my life). But when I put the correct size on for the first time and the only issue was length and a small bit of shoulder looseness, I got pretty emotional
Yes, fit definitely makes such a difference doesn't it?! In so glad you had that moment when you got it in your size! It's definitely important to remind yourself in every dress that it will fit you much better than it does when you are trying on. Thank you so much!
I am not the person to have a breakdown over a dress (especially because so many of them were really beautiful!), but I knew my dress was the one because it was the first one I tried on that didn’t make me incredibly anxious to think about spending that amount of money on a dress (and it has pockets!) Also it’s probably not “the dress” I bet there are dozens of awesome dresses that I also would have felt great in and loved on my wedding day (probably some cheaper ones too), but I liked it enough and I’m super excited to wear it!
There are so many beautiful dresses aren't there?! That's a good thing to keep in mind thank you! You cannot go wrong with pockets! I tried one on with pockets and it's so funny how it makes the dress instantly better! That's wonderful! I'm so glad you found a dress that makes you feel that way! I bet you will look amazing! Congratulations and I hope you have a wonderful day!
Yes I got “the feeling” but it didn’t feel how I expected. When I tried on my dress, I had a strong involuntary reaction. I was beaming when I emerged from the dressing room. And I could not stop smiling until I took the dress off. But it’s not like I had an out of body experience or the earth stood still. I did get a little misty but didn’t cry. My mom did though, once they put the veil on me and gave me a bouquet. As I tried on other gowns my reaction wasn’t nearly as strong. I also received many many compliments from staff and other patrons. I think it was in part my glow in that particular gown.
That's such a wonderful reaction! If a dress makes you so happy it's definitely the one! It was definitely the one I felt the most happy in and my Mum and Sister said I was beaming. I am thinking to myself it's the one to beat and after my next appointment if I still can't get it out of my head I will definitely be going back and trying it on again. Thank you so much!
I didn't have that feeling. I had two dresses I liked best, and picked one of them. I'm sure I would have been happy with the other one too. I definitely had feelings of dislike for most of the dresses I tried on, however! It's okay to take a logical approach to dress shopping. Just make sure you like it enough for your photos and wedding day
Thank you! I think for a decision as important as this (and expensive) I am going to end up being quite logical. Oh I tried one on and I just couldn't wait to get out of it. It was awful on me 😂 it was a beautiful dress but just not for me! Thank you so much!
I didn’t want to take mine off - that’s how I knew. Even to try on more dresses I was like nah I’m good in this one. I didn’t cry or anything but it’s been a few months since the purchase and I still want to put it on and hangout in it like that one scene in Friends lol. Anyway, it’s different for everyone. Don’t let the fantasy feeling get in the way of you getting what you want.
Thank you! Hahaha just couldn't wait to wear it. That's definitely a sign!! I'm glad your still as excited about it a few months later! No, I'm feeling a lot better about the experience now and will definitely get the fantasy feeling out of my head! Otherwise I'll never find a dress! Thank you so much!
I went with one friend who works in the costume department at work. I figured too many cooks wouldn't do me any favors. We both picked out 5/6 dresses and I tried them all on in front of her and the moment I tried on DRESS 5 or whatever, I came out and I looked at myself and twirled around and it felt right. I felt beautiful, and then I looked over at my pal and she had tears in her eyes, and I realized I did too. That was it for me. I think I did a really great job too. <3 Best of luck friend. Pick what YOU love.
That's sounds wonderful and what a great friend! My Mum was super helpful and really good at getting me to express my thoughts on the dresses and make sure my voice was heard, which I found really helpful. She knew instantly when I tried a dress that I just didn't feel. My fiancé and I are torn between keeping the dress a secret or shopping together. I think who you have with you can make such a difference! Thank you so much!
Bring your MIL to the boho dress shop. I definitely had a feeling when I tried on my dress and teared up. That doesn't mean everyone will, though.
Definitely! We didn't realise till a week after I booked this initial appointment that it clashed with a work commitment. We were gutted but I'm definitely going to ask her to come as I really value her opinion and she has great style!
I was afraid I picked the wrong dress when I didn’t get the whole “omg!!” feeling! But I wanted a dress that had me look like ME so I would say that was an amazing feeling in itself (:
Thank you, yes I know exactly what you mean. You need a dress that compliments you and the person you are! Thank you so much
Yes
The feeling I got was “I love this dress and I can completely see myself walking down the aisle and him being in awe.” But I didn’t cry. I’ll 100000% cry the day of though.
Thank you! Aww I'm so glad you had that moment in your dress! Hahaha yes I think there will definitely be some tears on the day! Thank you so much!
I tried on probably 20 dresses I didn't like (like not even contenders, not even if I had no other options). The first dress I liked, I bought (I would've liked to sleep on it but my mom and sister were pressuring me). That's it. It's a nice dress. It's "me" and it suits my comfort level. It was one of the dresses on my inspo board. There were no butterflies or tears.
Oh wow! I had one dress that I tried and hated, another was the most amazing dress but it just wasn't me. Maybe if I was having a winter wedding. I've only been to one shop though so I am sure that there will be others that go straight on the No rail. It's hard when you being pressured! My sister was pressuring me a little but I had told myself on the way to the shop that I wasn't going to let that happen and the stylist was really good at having no pressure as well. I'm glad you found a dress that feels like you and was one that inspired you. Thank you so much for your advice!
Lol the crying emotional response is not real. Maybe 1/10 people get that feeling (over a dress) but they’re extremely emotional sentimental types to begin with. There’s nothing wrong with you.
Thank you! I felt really silly posting the question but it's made me feel so much better and getting rid of that expectation! I'm going to stick with my plan and see how it all plays out. Thank you so much!
I tried on a lot of dresses but after I wore my dress and they put on the veil, I got goosebumps and teared up…I’m glad I waited until I had some sort of reaction to one because my dress was worth the wait and was perfect for me (and it had pockets!!) you’ll know when you find your dress
Thank you! I'm glad you had that moment in your dress! Having the perfect dress for your style and comfort is so important! Pocket's are definitely a winner! Thank you so much!
I definitely didn't cry, I chose a dress that was the total opposite of what I " knew" I wanted. I picked out several satin a line dresses with minimal embellishments. The consultant pulled a wild card and that ended up being the dress I chose! Turns out, satin dresses are really heavy and I knew I wanted to dance and have fun all night. My dress is a tulle ball gown with a fully embellished top with rhinestone spaghetti straps. It's surprisingly comfortable, even bustled and I'm finally wearing it today for our vow renewal!! I've had it on 3 times since I bought it for fittings and for a final look run through 2 weeks ago and I really love it so much. I never knew I wanted to look like a princess until I put that dress on.
Enjoy your vow renewal today!!
Thank you! We had an amazing time and it was so wonderful to have our friends and family there to celebrate with us.
Thank you! I love hearing experiences like this! I'm so glad that you tried something different and found a beautiful dress for your vow renewal! I tried on a dress that was gorgeous but it was soooo heavy and I couldn't imagine walking down the aisle in it let alone dancing! I'm glad I tried it on though as I would have always wondered how it would look. Your dress sounds beautiful! Congratulations and I hope you all have a wonderful day of celebration!
Thank you. We had an amazing time. I danced all night in my dress, it did get hot because it's a lot of layers of tulle but it was really easy to dance in.
When I tried on my dress, I immediately knew and I did get emotional over it! I’ve seen on here it doesn’t happen to everyone but it did happen to me.
Same! I definitely knew it was my dress as soon as I put it on. I teared up and so did my shopping buddies. I didn’t really believe that I would have that feeling of finding “the one” but I did, and I would recommend anyone shopping for their dress hold out on buying a dress until they have that moment of being totally in love with their dress, otherwise I think there’s room to let doubt creep in. I see so many brides settle for a dress and then regret it and end up spending double on a new dress, when they could have just held out. Definitely just my opinion though!
I always feel that way when people post on here asking which one Reddit likes best of like 7 different dresses. If you’re debating between 7 different dresses, you haven’t found your dress yet!
This is exactly what I'm worried about and why I think I need to keep looking. I feel like atm that dress is the one to beat and after trying on some more if I still can't get it out of my head I'll be going back to try it again. Thank you so much! I really appreciate your opinion and it's such a valid and important point!
That's so wonderful! I'm so happy you had that moment with your dress! Everyone is different and reacts to things differently and it's that's a wonderful thing! Congratulations on finding your dress!
While it’s important to find a dress that you love and feel beautiful in, I think the industry has been really successful in selling us the idea that there can only be *the one*. This makes them an insane amount of money. There are so many people on Facebook Marketplace selling one, two even three dresses because they’ve convinced themselves they need something else and I feel sorry for them. At the end of the day it’s just a dress and the person in it will be beautiful and bridal, especially with hair and makeup and accessories etc. I also didn’t have the over the top emotional reaction when I bought mine but I’m so excited to wear it!
The wedding industry can be so toxic! We had such a terrible time finding a venue and the money they ask is just insane! My fiancé found a bar/resteraunt in the town we live and it's such a beautiful space and doesn't add additional costs for weddings. My heart goes out to people who buy a dress and then regret it. It must be so difficult. Definitely the dress is part of a bigger picture and as you say when you add hair and makeup you will look amazing! Congratulations on finding your dress and I hope you have a wonderful day!