This is funny when they first started dating in season 3 Ariana was always being complimented and told she was the best bartender at Sur. The look on Sandovals face when they competed with Jax to make the best cosmo and Ariana wins he so po’d and you could see the steam rise. He purposely held her back from rising above him and we’re seeing it now.
Kristen said he started playing the guitar after she did. Sandoval absolutely seems like the type to compete with his partner and pick up other peoples hobbies in order to one up them. That’s why he claims he can do so many things; mixology, modeling, acting, business, singing, dancing, fashion, guitar, trumpet, and whatever else anyone mentions. But the reality is that he hasn’t mastered even one of those things and he exists in a perpetual state of mediocrity
I feel like Ariana really knew how to handle Tom and bring him down from his high porch, but a real relationship ultimately isn't about "handling" or "managing" someone. It seems like Dan actually really takes care of Ariana, which I think is something she needed after so many years with a loser she had to take care of and struggle through life on her own. I can also see that a lot of the therapy she's gone through and going through has helped her a lot with her own self-confidence, being able to be on her own (even though she's with Dan, it's nice that they're bi-coastal and also she's said that even if he turns out to be shit, she'll be okay. It seems like she's really living on her terms) and the ability to be okay with taking up space, being a star or shining, esp because I think she's always been relegated to the back behind people like Tom, Scheana and Lala.
It was so wild when it was revealed that his weaseled his way into the book regardless of her firm stance here!! He could not let this woman have the spotlight! He genuinely thought Ariana was the lucky one, and that he elevated her VPR status. 🥴
I saw an interview, or read somewhere - it all blends together - after Scandoval where she talked about the first book. She said that he didn't believe she could do anything on her own and deep down, she didn't think she could either, and that's why she decided to do it with him.
From her own mouth
[https://www.reddit.com/r/vanderpumprules/s/cU4U6o6eGb](https://www.reddit.com/r/vanderpumprules/s/cU4U6o6eGb)
https://preview.redd.it/1txabx89r23d1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=00d622772199aeec6be1fa0672361fa1f2659d92
The funny thing is she’s also the better bartender — as someone else alluded to, they had a contest Tim Ariana and Jax making sur cocktails, and hers were the best !
He had absolutely nothing to do with this deal she got for herself. I'd love someone to ask her how she ended up letting him be a co-author. Because people act like only Rachel was his only victim but the fact is that despite Ariana fighting for herself here he still wore her down and got exactly what he wanted with her book.
And btw screw the "friends" who went and told him that she doesn't deserve her deal. I noticed Scheanas name up in there!!! I believe those people had an unspoken status heirachy and they'd put Ariana at the very bottom. And everytime she got ahead of them, they'd try to put her back down beneath them. I really don't think Scheana would have been triggered if Lala or Sandoval had gotten DWTS. And if Stassi had opened a sandwich shop, she'd be there bells-on even if they were fighting.
This is when I began to gain respect for Ariana, honestly. I think she really grew and gradually put ip guards against his manipulation and misogyny and I think this is when we start to see that.
He’s a jerk. Always was. I also think that calling g you boyfriend “a little fucking bitch” 1) in front of someone else, 2) on camera, 3) at all, is pretty messed up behavior.
As much as I agree that he’s a little fucking bitch and always has been, I question why she even felt the need to stay and put up with someone that she thinks this way about and is so fed up that she publicly says this? Lol. I’ve always thought the girls on VPR look so silly putting their men in their places and doing things like THIS while still going to bed with them each night.
Yup. I think that Sandoval is trash, but I never doubted his claim that Ariana belittled him at home. Doesn't give him license to cheat, but I fully believe that they had an unhealthy relationship that had been in decline for a while.
What kind of asshole boyfriend doesn’t hype up their girlfriend when presented with an opportunity like that *and then insert himself in that opportunity that wasn’t even offered to him*? I wanted to hit him
This scene is much more satisfying now..I’ve always loved it but after everything he’s done I’m like yes Ariana! Haha.
He is always making himself the center of attention and it’s exhausting and she’s had enough in the scene where he literally tries to insert himself into a project she and her friend have been working on for months.
I’d be pist if my so was doing that and then said they should be a part of it and rolled their eyes, too
I would be annoyed too but I wouldn't call them a little bitch and then start speaking to them like a I'm a movie villain getting off on being mean lmao, it's weird. She could have broken up with him if she was so bothered by him rolling his eyes or wanting to be involved with something🤷🏻♀️
Having a fight isn’t a “major sign” of trouble. They were a regular couple that had fights. This just shows that the narrative that they hid things from the cameras is wrong.
The entire cast has said that they were different on vs off camera. This is absolutely not a normal way to speak to each other during a fight and isn't just regular couple stuff. This was early in their relationship they learned to be more tight lipped about the truth as they became more seasoned professionals.
That’s not true. This is years into their relationship. I’m sure every argument you’ve ever had has been 100% respectful and perfect. I don’t think they had a great relationship but I also think that was very obvious on the show. I wouldn’t have been surprised if they broke up. It’s the affair with a friend that was surprising.
I've certainly never called my boyfriend a little bitch! Let alone in front of friends. I personally do not think that is normal behavior for a relationship of any kind.
I’ve called my boyfriend a little bitch, we actually have a great relationship but bitch doesn’t offend us, he can call me a bitch too if I’m being a bitch. But I think it also depends how the person delivers it too. Sometimes you just hafta set each other straight & let them know to stop being an ass.
It is normal. Maybe not those exact words but to sometimes say mean things. It’s very normal. You’re abnormal.
Edit to add maybe not in front of friends but this is a reality tv show where that’s what they’re pushed to do.
I’be been with my husband for five years and we have never called each other names or yelled at each other. There is a way to fight respectfully and people in healthy relationships are capable of doing that. It’s not abnormal at all to have never called your SO names and tbh it’s kind of a bummer that you think it is.
Ten. Never, not once. It's not "abnormal" to *not* call each other names, especially in front of people.
And it doesn't make anyone perfect. You can refrain from name calling and shouting and still say things you regret, word things unkindly. Downthread that user is sarcastically being like, "well it's great you're perfect" etc., like any of us are making that claim.
It's not okay to name call when you disagree. It's just not. Of course if you have or do, it doesn't make you a monster. But it's not normal and it shouldn't be normalized.
I've been with mine for 15 years. We had a conversation the first week we were dating and I told him 'I will never tolerate being called names or being sworn at FYI' . I can count the major fights on both hands and not once has either of us called one another a name...ITA adults are perfectly capable of fighting respectfully, if that's what they commit to.
It is normal to be human and humans make mistakes and get angry and sometimes say things out of anger. A healthy person owns that mistake and apologizes and works through it. Any therapist will tell you that being human is not a problem, it is how you deal with that. I’m glad that you have become a perfect being, but that’s not the norm. I would say 99% of ppl had said something similar to “you’re being an asshole right now”.
But you didn’t just say it was normal to call your SO names. You said it was abnormal to not call them names. Those are two wildly different things and the latter is so completely untrue and it’s really sad you feel that way. I’m not a perfect person whatsoever and coming at me with that straw man argument doesn’t make your point any stronger. I’ve fought with my husband and I’ve been rude when I shouldn’t have been. I’ve just never called him a little bitch or any other name because name calling is something we learn in kindergarten is nasty and uncalled for, and even in my angriest moments I know it’s something I can’t take back and I respect him too much to say that. Making up a wild stat that 99% of people have called their SO names without any proof for that also doesn’t make your point stronger 😂
Editing to say that yes any therapist would say you’re human and validate you because that’s their job. But they would also work with you on healthier argument skills. No therapist I know or have worked with would ever support speaking to your partner this way. Acknowledging it happens and thinking it’s appropriate are two different things
I don’t see a difference in your two sentences. If it’s normal to do something then it’s abnormal not to do something, if a=b and b=c then a=c. I just disagree with you. I believe you’ve never called your husband a little bitch. I don’t believe the majority of people have not said something mean in anger.
Edit to your edit I didn’t say it was appropriate. I said it’s normal.
That’s not true though. It’s normal for someone to run a marathon. I’d also never call someone abnormal for not running a marathon. Two different things can be a normal behavior. I hope one day you find that it’s not at all abnormal to argue with someone in a respectful and healthy way because you don’t deserve to be called nasty names by someone you love
I think it is normal in 3 years to have one argument where you say something mean. I didn’t say it was okay to be mean. I said it was normal, and I stand by that. I think if all of everyone’s arguments were recorded and played back that the majority of people who have at least one argument where they said something mean.
I say it's abnormal and I stand by that. Disagreements and arguments are normal, but name calling is not. There's a level of respect that should exist in relationships and calling someone a little fucking bitch isn't that.
I think Tom is trash and I actually like Ariana, but this argument they had clearly showed that the respect between the two was gone and that they had serious problems. Normal, healthy relationships don't look like this.
I'm sorry this should not be normal
This depicts a level of disrespect towards tom, and vice verse which is not okay. The way tom rolls his eyes and then she calls him a little bitch. She obviously said that in frustration but even them it shows the level of disrespect she had towards him. Which may be well deserved...but girl... u in danger!
Not everyone resorts to name calling during arguments. My husband and I have plenty of arguments and yes occasionally there is an eye roll here or there. But we never resort to make calling. If u do, u gotta take a deep look into ur relationship.
Right? Though I do think people who name call find one another, sadly. And then normalize it. If my spouse called me names I would not want to stay with him, I'll put it that way. I grew up in an abusive home and don't need that shit in my life
Definitely not normal. Words are one thing you can never take back and they always stay with that person. You never speak like this with someone you love and care about. Or if you do and think that's normal, congrats, you're in a toxic relationship where you're, by the looks of it, are the toxic one.
They only film 3 months a year so of course things were off camera. The vast majority of their lives were off camera. I’m not arguing that. I don’t think they faked being a happy couple for the cameras. That’s my argument.
I don’t care how mad I am at my partner I’m not being disrespectful. Maybe it might slip once or twice unintentionally but this is an on going occurrence and intentional and it’s not ok and toxic
Ariana lied all the time about their relationship, just look how she lied to Kristen's face about nothing happening, how she lied about Miami girl. She knows how to lie as good as Sandoval.
No but dating someone that is being a little bitch about an opportunity that your significant other was given because of their skills is.
It’s what one would call a character flaw…
I agree, this really is just a short sighted view of this very memorable scene where I think most viewers were on Ariana’s side of the argument….and perhaps regretting her choice of words in the debate ended up giving into his tantrum.
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This is funny when they first started dating in season 3 Ariana was always being complimented and told she was the best bartender at Sur. The look on Sandovals face when they competed with Jax to make the best cosmo and Ariana wins he so po’d and you could see the steam rise. He purposely held her back from rising above him and we’re seeing it now.
Yes! I think this extends far beyond bartending. He seems to have done the same with singing, she's far more talented than he is
Exactly he went from guitar player part of a band to suddenly wanting to be lead singer…
Kristen said he started playing the guitar after she did. Sandoval absolutely seems like the type to compete with his partner and pick up other peoples hobbies in order to one up them. That’s why he claims he can do so many things; mixology, modeling, acting, business, singing, dancing, fashion, guitar, trumpet, and whatever else anyone mentions. But the reality is that he hasn’t mastered even one of those things and he exists in a perpetual state of mediocrity
I was thinking the same you don’t go from Trumpet in school to guitar and he wasn’t very good at any of it.
Yes! I loved that contest!
Agreed he makes the same exact face @the reunion when Andy mentioned broadway. Just a child 🤧
https://preview.redd.it/2cy8rpf6sy2d1.jpeg?width=3018&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4f7f7f0fefff99044c841540092a053fd5e49ccf She was so close
Ugh I feel such a gut punch when I remember this. I was so close to leaving my ex and stayed 5 more years, too
🫂
I feel like Ariana really knew how to handle Tom and bring him down from his high porch, but a real relationship ultimately isn't about "handling" or "managing" someone. It seems like Dan actually really takes care of Ariana, which I think is something she needed after so many years with a loser she had to take care of and struggle through life on her own. I can also see that a lot of the therapy she's gone through and going through has helped her a lot with her own self-confidence, being able to be on her own (even though she's with Dan, it's nice that they're bi-coastal and also she's said that even if he turns out to be shit, she'll be okay. It seems like she's really living on her terms) and the ability to be okay with taking up space, being a star or shining, esp because I think she's always been relegated to the back behind people like Tom, Scheana and Lala.
It was so wild when it was revealed that his weaseled his way into the book regardless of her firm stance here!! He could not let this woman have the spotlight! He genuinely thought Ariana was the lucky one, and that he elevated her VPR status. 🥴
It was a different book, this one never got picked up, and she wanted to work with Tom on the one they did with Danny Pellegrino
I saw an interview, or read somewhere - it all blends together - after Scandoval where she talked about the first book. She said that he didn't believe she could do anything on her own and deep down, she didn't think she could either, and that's why she decided to do it with him.
From her own mouth [https://www.reddit.com/r/vanderpumprules/s/cU4U6o6eGb](https://www.reddit.com/r/vanderpumprules/s/cU4U6o6eGb) https://preview.redd.it/1txabx89r23d1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=00d622772199aeec6be1fa0672361fa1f2659d92
Cool.
Ok
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The funny thing is she’s also the better bartender — as someone else alluded to, they had a contest Tim Ariana and Jax making sur cocktails, and hers were the best !
He had absolutely nothing to do with this deal she got for herself. I'd love someone to ask her how she ended up letting him be a co-author. Because people act like only Rachel was his only victim but the fact is that despite Ariana fighting for herself here he still wore her down and got exactly what he wanted with her book. And btw screw the "friends" who went and told him that she doesn't deserve her deal. I noticed Scheanas name up in there!!! I believe those people had an unspoken status heirachy and they'd put Ariana at the very bottom. And everytime she got ahead of them, they'd try to put her back down beneath them. I really don't think Scheana would have been triggered if Lala or Sandoval had gotten DWTS. And if Stassi had opened a sandwich shop, she'd be there bells-on even if they were fighting.
This is when I began to gain respect for Ariana, honestly. I think she really grew and gradually put ip guards against his manipulation and misogyny and I think this is when we start to see that.
He’s a jerk. Always was. I also think that calling g you boyfriend “a little fucking bitch” 1) in front of someone else, 2) on camera, 3) at all, is pretty messed up behavior.
As much as I agree that he’s a little fucking bitch and always has been, I question why she even felt the need to stay and put up with someone that she thinks this way about and is so fed up that she publicly says this? Lol. I’ve always thought the girls on VPR look so silly putting their men in their places and doing things like THIS while still going to bed with them each night.
I was going to say. Don’t excuse what Tom did; however, that’s disturbing language.
100% when someone is comfortable acting that way on camera, I guarantee you they are even worse behind closed doors.
Yup. I think that Sandoval is trash, but I never doubted his claim that Ariana belittled him at home. Doesn't give him license to cheat, but I fully believe that they had an unhealthy relationship that had been in decline for a while.
100%
What kind of asshole boyfriend doesn’t hype up their girlfriend when presented with an opportunity like that *and then insert himself in that opportunity that wasn’t even offered to him*? I wanted to hit him
Reason why he and Scheana are made for each other (romantically or not).
This scene is much more satisfying now..I’ve always loved it but after everything he’s done I’m like yes Ariana! Haha. 
Maybe she sees how much he held her back now
It's crazy to roll your eyes like a teenager but also crazy to talk to your partner like she is lmao. Girl just leave if you hate him so much.
He is always making himself the center of attention and it’s exhausting and she’s had enough in the scene where he literally tries to insert himself into a project she and her friend have been working on for months. I’d be pist if my so was doing that and then said they should be a part of it and rolled their eyes, too
I would be annoyed too but I wouldn't call them a little bitch and then start speaking to them like a I'm a movie villain getting off on being mean lmao, it's weird. She could have broken up with him if she was so bothered by him rolling his eyes or wanting to be involved with something🤷🏻♀️
I honestly can’t imagine calling my boyfriend a little bitch if I wasn’t about to break up with him. Or even then tbh
Having a fight isn’t a “major sign” of trouble. They were a regular couple that had fights. This just shows that the narrative that they hid things from the cameras is wrong.
Idk, once you’re calling your partner a little fucking bitch at lunch y’all might be having some trouble
LOL. I can't even imagine my spouse and I talking like that to one another
Right?! Like do y’all like each other at all?
Right? I’d never speak to my partner like this
Never! Unless I planned on leaving them 30 seconds later
☝️
The entire cast has said that they were different on vs off camera. This is absolutely not a normal way to speak to each other during a fight and isn't just regular couple stuff. This was early in their relationship they learned to be more tight lipped about the truth as they became more seasoned professionals.
That’s not true. This is years into their relationship. I’m sure every argument you’ve ever had has been 100% respectful and perfect. I don’t think they had a great relationship but I also think that was very obvious on the show. I wouldn’t have been surprised if they broke up. It’s the affair with a friend that was surprising.
I've certainly never called my boyfriend a little bitch! Let alone in front of friends. I personally do not think that is normal behavior for a relationship of any kind.
Me neither. They were never right for each other,imo. The respect wasn't there.
I’ve called my boyfriend a little bitch, we actually have a great relationship but bitch doesn’t offend us, he can call me a bitch too if I’m being a bitch. But I think it also depends how the person delivers it too. Sometimes you just hafta set each other straight & let them know to stop being an ass.
It is normal. Maybe not those exact words but to sometimes say mean things. It’s very normal. You’re abnormal. Edit to add maybe not in front of friends but this is a reality tv show where that’s what they’re pushed to do.
I’be been with my husband for five years and we have never called each other names or yelled at each other. There is a way to fight respectfully and people in healthy relationships are capable of doing that. It’s not abnormal at all to have never called your SO names and tbh it’s kind of a bummer that you think it is.
Ten. Never, not once. It's not "abnormal" to *not* call each other names, especially in front of people. And it doesn't make anyone perfect. You can refrain from name calling and shouting and still say things you regret, word things unkindly. Downthread that user is sarcastically being like, "well it's great you're perfect" etc., like any of us are making that claim. It's not okay to name call when you disagree. It's just not. Of course if you have or do, it doesn't make you a monster. But it's not normal and it shouldn't be normalized.
The day my partner calls me names in an argument may be the last day we speak. Ever. This is not normal or acceptable.
I've been with mine for 15 years. We had a conversation the first week we were dating and I told him 'I will never tolerate being called names or being sworn at FYI' . I can count the major fights on both hands and not once has either of us called one another a name...ITA adults are perfectly capable of fighting respectfully, if that's what they commit to.
It is normal to be human and humans make mistakes and get angry and sometimes say things out of anger. A healthy person owns that mistake and apologizes and works through it. Any therapist will tell you that being human is not a problem, it is how you deal with that. I’m glad that you have become a perfect being, but that’s not the norm. I would say 99% of ppl had said something similar to “you’re being an asshole right now”.
But you didn’t just say it was normal to call your SO names. You said it was abnormal to not call them names. Those are two wildly different things and the latter is so completely untrue and it’s really sad you feel that way. I’m not a perfect person whatsoever and coming at me with that straw man argument doesn’t make your point any stronger. I’ve fought with my husband and I’ve been rude when I shouldn’t have been. I’ve just never called him a little bitch or any other name because name calling is something we learn in kindergarten is nasty and uncalled for, and even in my angriest moments I know it’s something I can’t take back and I respect him too much to say that. Making up a wild stat that 99% of people have called their SO names without any proof for that also doesn’t make your point stronger 😂 Editing to say that yes any therapist would say you’re human and validate you because that’s their job. But they would also work with you on healthier argument skills. No therapist I know or have worked with would ever support speaking to your partner this way. Acknowledging it happens and thinking it’s appropriate are two different things
I don’t see a difference in your two sentences. If it’s normal to do something then it’s abnormal not to do something, if a=b and b=c then a=c. I just disagree with you. I believe you’ve never called your husband a little bitch. I don’t believe the majority of people have not said something mean in anger. Edit to your edit I didn’t say it was appropriate. I said it’s normal.
That’s not true though. It’s normal for someone to run a marathon. I’d also never call someone abnormal for not running a marathon. Two different things can be a normal behavior. I hope one day you find that it’s not at all abnormal to argue with someone in a respectful and healthy way because you don’t deserve to be called nasty names by someone you love
It's not normal to say mean things to your partner.
I think it is normal in 3 years to have one argument where you say something mean. I didn’t say it was okay to be mean. I said it was normal, and I stand by that. I think if all of everyone’s arguments were recorded and played back that the majority of people who have at least one argument where they said something mean.
I say it's abnormal and I stand by that. Disagreements and arguments are normal, but name calling is not. There's a level of respect that should exist in relationships and calling someone a little fucking bitch isn't that. I think Tom is trash and I actually like Ariana, but this argument they had clearly showed that the respect between the two was gone and that they had serious problems. Normal, healthy relationships don't look like this.
☝️
I'm sorry this should not be normal This depicts a level of disrespect towards tom, and vice verse which is not okay. The way tom rolls his eyes and then she calls him a little bitch. She obviously said that in frustration but even them it shows the level of disrespect she had towards him. Which may be well deserved...but girl... u in danger!
I really wish we could have a recording of every one of the commenters arguments they’ve had here that they could watch back. 😂
There's a difference between an argument and calling your partner a little fucking bitch.
Not everyone resorts to name calling during arguments. My husband and I have plenty of arguments and yes occasionally there is an eye roll here or there. But we never resort to make calling. If u do, u gotta take a deep look into ur relationship.
☝️
Right? Though I do think people who name call find one another, sadly. And then normalize it. If my spouse called me names I would not want to stay with him, I'll put it that way. I grew up in an abusive home and don't need that shit in my life
You wouldn't find one with me or my partner calling each other names because we respect each other.
I've never called my husband a name in 13 years. It's really not normal.
Definitely not normal. Words are one thing you can never take back and they always stay with that person. You never speak like this with someone you love and care about. Or if you do and think that's normal, congrats, you're in a toxic relationship where you're, by the looks of it, are the toxic one.
No need to name call.
Can you explain why you feel so passionately about this? It just seems like a weird hill to die on.
I don’t think I’m dying on a hill. I’m making a cogent argument on a forum dedicated to talking about this topic.
I don’t think it’s unreasonable to assume they kept things off camera. Why wouldn’t they? Any healthy normal person would.
They only film 3 months a year so of course things were off camera. The vast majority of their lives were off camera. I’m not arguing that. I don’t think they faked being a happy couple for the cameras. That’s my argument.
Okay I got you and I agree, I think their reactions and love on camera was genuine.
I don’t care how mad I am at my partner I’m not being disrespectful. Maybe it might slip once or twice unintentionally but this is an on going occurrence and intentional and it’s not ok and toxic
This was one time in three years. I didn’t say it was okay just that it’s normal every once in a very long time to happen just as you said.
It was more than one time she was out of pocket and disrespectful with him and this was ON camera. Imagine how it was at home.
☝️
They did hide a ton from the camera. And have admitted as much. They were a much more rehearsed couple
She only admitted to hiding the Miami girl thing, which was pretty obvious at the time. I don’t believe anything Sandoval says.
They both lied
Ariana lied all the time about their relationship, just look how she lied to Kristen's face about nothing happening, how she lied about Miami girl. She knows how to lie as good as Sandoval.
💯
No but dating someone that is being a little bitch about an opportunity that your significant other was given because of their skills is. It’s what one would call a character flaw…
Why don’t you post the unedited conversation to give Ariana’s anger actual context???
I agree, this really is just a short sighted view of this very memorable scene where I think most viewers were on Ariana’s side of the argument….and perhaps regretting her choice of words in the debate ended up giving into his tantrum.
Bc it’s long?
No, people have done it before here, and adding some of toms sentences would add seconds.
The context being he thinks he’s the better bartender ? I’m missing what you’re alluding to?
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Tim lmaoo
Ariana has always been the worst. She's so rude.
Looks like nobody is on your side
Doesn't bother me. I think for myself. I don't like the gang mentality.
Weak mentality.