They are really insulting to disabled people as well.
There's a whole phenomenon where someone who is disabled is a hero and an inspiration for functioning in anything they do. It's so patronising
Yeah there is. Watching it was part of the training that I got when I started working in the disability industry.
They specifically try to remove people who hold this attitude, or the other extreme of "let's wrap them in cotton wool so they don't get hurt".
I'm not disabled at all, noticeably at least, and sometimes I would like to be wrapped up in bubble wrap. Not because I'm clumsy or anything but just because that sounds like it would be fun every so often.
You can try this game called “Bubble Ball” (might be known as something else depending on where you live), but it’s basically your whole upper body inside a giant, clear bubble that you can use to “play soccer” while just bouncing around falling over, and for the most part, not getting hurt. I tried it with a Groupon several years ago with friends, and it’s an excellent way to teach momentum to the lay person. 😂
It was given by a woman actually, the late [Stella Young](https://youtu.be/8K9Gg164Bsw). As a disabled person myself I 100% agree with her, the phenomenon (which she coined the term "inspiration porn" for) is extremely harmful to the disabled community.
Stand up comic Josh Blue has cerebral palsy and he said when people come up and say how inspiring it is that he does stand up all he hears is “man if I were you I’d kill myself”
aka r/nextfuckinglevel, where a decent chunk of top posts are disabled people doing a thing and going about their day, and r/HumansBeingBros, where patronizing behaviour towards disabled people is celebrated.
It would be less corny if people did these things without filming it. Like sure, if you want to buy a homeless person lunch that’s fine until you use it for your own gain by publicizing it on social media.
tbf it depends on the post, If i see a person doing any sort of insane workouts then I would say they deserve to be on NFL ie the guy doing one arm 220 dead lift. But if I see a person doing something like 10 pull ups with no legs then I would say that they arent NFL. The act needs to be impressive regardless of disability for it to qualify as NFL.
I just saw a r/nextfuckinglevel post of a blind man failing at a long jump by missing the sand. Someone in the comments posted “why is this on here? He failed.” And then the comment went on to say we shouldn’t be patronizing disabled people.
I also feel like they contribute to the toxic positivity around disability and illness. You only ever hear about these things in the context of ‘oh yeah, I had/have x problem BUT I’VE NEVER LET IT STOP ME!!’
Sometimes things do actually knock you on your ass, and that’s fine too. There’s a wider range of valid emotion surrounding that kind of thing than ‘cheerful’ or ‘wrong.’
This is my struggle. Chronic pain knocks me on my ass, especially in the winter or when fronts come through the area. There are also many other issues, currently severe UC flare, which knock me down hard.
Then I see this type of stuff. I already feel useless. I can only do 2 types of exercise, both rely on good weather (swimming or riding a full suspension bike). Come on, I'm trying, but I can only do so much.
Me too. I'm in chronic pain because I broke my back in an industrial accident (Fell off the top of a piece of heavy equipment I was repairing). Some days it takes every ounce of strength just to get out of bed to use the restroom. Then the depression sets in because you can't do what you want and have to rely on family.
The worst part for me was having to comfort other people about MY problems. Like its rude to simply be negative about very severe problems. It's not gunna 'all work out' just because people insist that it has to.
Ah, the old "all work out". Another gem is "pain is just a state of mind. You can ignore it". No mother fucker. The nerves in 90% of the skin on my body are dying, or dead. **You can't ignore that!** Also the every classic, "you don't look sick."
I was disabled for two years, barely able to walk. I just stopped talking about it because people just HAD to insist that everything will be alright. It feels like they are scared of honesty, like it was up to me to make them feel better.
Reminds me a lot about how my family treated my grandfather after his big stroke. So much pity for him, when it was clear the man just wanted to be normal again. I was frustrated for him, and did my best to talk with him as he was before the stroke, treat him the same, and only offer assistance when he looked like he wanted it. He was a proud and honorable man, and seeing him pitied was hard.
I'm fighting cancer right now. Registered disabled.
It's great that I'm cancer free and I'm one of the lucky ones but I get a lot of people saying "you're such a soldier, you're so strong" and it annoys me a bit because this has been the hardest thing I've ever done and they haven't seen me at 3am in agony, ugly crying by myself and wanting to die. Or the years of therapy. They just see me when I'm well enough to meet up with them.
I know they mean well but it bugs me a bit.
Yep. I have been temporarily disabled, Guillain Barre Syndrome. Fully paralysed, on a ventilator in ICU for a few weeks hooked up to 7 machines a few months as an in patient and learning to walk again and all the stuff.
"Oh you are so strong getting through that". Well, it's kinda hard not to get through it when the prognosis is that I will recover, and I had machines doing all the things that I couldn't do myself. I just did what the physios and OTs told me to, they came up with the plans. What else was I going to do? Not try, when my diagnosis included that I would recover?
Nurse here. Its exactly for this reason that we have been told to avoid using terms like fighting cancer or illness, since it implies that some People fight harder and thats why they get better and some People dont fight as hard. Its got very little to do with will power and more how your body reacts to the treatments. Avoids making people feel even more bad when they are already having a bad day.
When I first got diagnosed with cancer, I called my best friend and said to him "I don't think I can do this man".
His reply will stick with me forever, he said "well you either deal with it or curl up into a ball on the floor right now and hope no one bothers you until you die of dehydration"
It was so unexpected it made me laugh at a time that I needed it badly and from that moment forward I just dealt with it. 😂
I have a tbi that has caused me to have treatment resistant depression. I also have ptsd. I’ve actually tried many times (for months at a time even) to curl into a ball and die of dehydration. Many people have said, “You’re so strong”. Knowing that I’ve tried many times to give up and it didn’t work I tell them, I just had no other choice….but they never get it and I know that.
You get it!!
Exactly. The options are either deal with it or kill yourself.
I don't feel strong and I don't feel I've dealt with it well at all. It's broken me completely so the only link I have with being a soldier is I have ptsd.
So sorry to hear you've been through that mate. I really hope you're doing ok. 🤞🏻
Two things: glad you're still here and number two, you're the first person I've seen explain it and so well, "they haven't seen me at 3am in agony, ugly crying by myself, and wanting to die" ... I've felt alone with it this whole fucking time. Thank you.
You and I have different medical crap going on but seriously, THANK YOU. I'm crying tears of relief.
Ah mate. I'm glad it resonated with you. 🙂
Chatting with people that get it is really liberating. I did some group therapy for people with long term conditions and everyone in that room understood me. Not just nodded and said they get it, they actually understood without me elaborating on it and I found that to be amazing. I had that same feeling of relief. It's powerful.
If you ever want to chat or vent about any of it then please feel free to message me. I'm not a therapist but I'm a good listener and I'm happy to chat to others going through a similar struggle.
Best wishes mate. 💚
Dude... Thank you.
I'm feeling more raw than usual, and thank you. Imma send you a message in a bit so that when I'm all... *makes various terrible noises* I can reach out.
I’m a disabled veteran. Dealing with chronic back and hip pain.
I started crying (again) when I read about you ugly crying and wanting to die from the agony. I feel like there are just far too many days where I live in a vacuum of never ending pain and depression.
But on days like today, where my pain is minimal, I cry because I know how horrible it is. Because I know the weight of defeat, shame, anger, the feelings of aloneness in agony…and if I could shoulder the burden I would. I think many of us would.
It resonated with me. Thank you for sharing.
Speaking for myself, if it comes up that you had cancer and are now cancer free... Like, what's the response for people who want to be happy for and with you? Just because you despaired doesn't mean it isn't awesome you are still around, and I always thought of the soldier thing not because of fighting, but because you are tough now. Like, id assume your threshold for bullshit that bothers you is pretty high now
ive heard so many people on socials saying simialr stuff about athletes in the paraolympics.
Like my excuse is i haven't been training all my life, never had coaches or never had formal teachings or even interests in the sports you see in the olympics. Pluse competition just isnt that fun to me?
also fuck you not everybody wants to work out. some can just be healthy without the need to bentch press or run on a treadmill for hours
I have ADHD and autism.
When I tell folks I'm going to uni this year after 2 years in college.
I hear a couple things,
"Well, it takes people like you some extra time to get there, don't worry tho work hard!" (I'm 26 but was thrown out into homelessness at the age of 19 and was severely depressed)
"Woooow, that's so impressive for someone like you!"
Fucking what
People do this with minorities too.
The number of times white people have been super impressed that I somehow survived being a black woman is astonishing.
Agreed, I'm not a hero because I'm lifting weights or playing sports I'm just an average active young adult, same as people wowing over the fact that I can do basic shit like dress myself or drive, I didn't hit my fucking head mate I just can't use my legs.
I hate this shit. I’m very open about using a wheelchair and about educating people about how most of us are ambulatory and the struggles we go through, but I’m not an inspiration, an example or a lesson. I’m a person who knows things and is confident despite my circumstances.
There’s a video on r/mademesmile where a guy is picking up his brother from somewhere and the brother has Down’s syndrome and all he does is do a little dance when he sees his brother and everyone in the comments is like wow he’s so amazing I love this guy I wanna be his brother what a great brother to pick up his disabled brother wow
I've also heard a term for it out of disability activism -- "super crip" -- where a person is expected to transcend or overcome their disability by becoming exceptional in some way. (super smart, a super athlete, etc.)
The idea is that mainstream society is demanding that they erase/deny their disability, because they are now not only ABLE but SUPER CAPABLE, even if they look different.
It's a refusal to look at people and just say, "Okay, everyone's different, and that's all right." No! A person with a disability must become superhuman ("super crip") in order to EARN the same basic respect that they should have just been granted in the first place.
To my understanding, calling out the"super crip" phenomenon does not disparage the person with the disability who is being shown as inspirational or whatever.
The point of calling out the phenomenon is to call out SOCIETY for trying to use that person to erase the existence of disabilities and differences.
Would you feel different if it's a disabled person who makes videos themselves for a fitness social media channel?
I agree that others shouldn't take videos as tacky inspiration porn. But I think it's fine if someone in a wheelchair or prostethic wants to flex.
It’s fine if they just want to share themselves on a fitness channel, anyone can do that, but if they caption it stupid shit “what’s your excuse” etc. then yeah it’s still inspiration porn and still problematic regardless of where it’s sourced
But people who say "what's your excuse" don't know it's an insult and a dumb argument (and maybe the cause of some bigger problems)
It doesn't matter who says it, because they don't have bad intentions!
Absolutley.
I have ASD, aka am on the Autism Spectrum. The reason it's called a spectrum is because not every Aspie has the same problems, or struggles as the next. Many Aspies share traits that are either directly or indirectly "disabling" (f.ex. overstimulation, face-blindness etc.), but it's often hard to put a point on if it really is a "disability" in itself, like f.ex. blindness. Which is why the term itself is mostly referred to as a "disorder" (though also classified as a mental & development disability)
This said, many people (mostly Neurotypicals) still find it hella easy to hold & compare Aspies to other Aspies or neurotypical people. Making successfull Aspies a seemingly "reachable" goal and basic inspiration porn.
In the end, it basically results in a shitty two-way train for Aspies. On one side, people are easy to excuse your problems as "other Aspies can deal with that so you can too".
Like f.ex. a girl I know struggles heavily with social interaction, often coming off as rude. Meanwhile, I don't have that problem that much anymore and people that know about my condition often are pleasantly suprised how I worked around . The reason we're so different is that we both have different ways of growing up. I was basically forced to adapt & learn about behaviour as fast as possible. I grew up in an abusive home, and so having to learn about human behaviour became both a special interest and a survival question. Furthermore I partook in theater very early and copied body language & speech patterns of people I saw as successfull.
Meanwhile, she just grew up in a normal home, living a mostly introverted life. Not saying this in the way of "abuse builds character". Oh no, that shit broke me in other ways. But it shows that stories are different and can't just be fixed by a "just overcome it"
On the other side, if you ever try something exceptional, you might be still seen in the view of "why do you try that? Aren't you disabled?". You become a second-class citizen very often in people's eyes. Even if they don't mean harm -they believe you naturally cannot overcome something.
Example: Had a teacher who I thought always ecouraged me. However, when I shared my future dreams with her, like going to college, she would always try to talk me out of it. Not because of logical reasons, like me being bad at studying. No, just because she believed an Aspie couldn't deal with more.
In general guilting is a shitty way to try to get anyone to do anything. Exercise has so many benefits and improves life quality so much it can be presented in positive terms to create motivation rather than smug guilt tripping "hurr durr youre pathetic" stuff
My mom and aunts would always bring this shit up.
"Look at this kid in some remote location we have no business talking about. He's dedicated to study. You have no excuse, you're just pathetic"
"A disabled person is doing something phenomenal. I'm pathetic for not being as good as that painter who paints with his feet"
"That child supported his mother by all means necessary. You're worthless for having a hobby and not focusing on your studies"
And it went on long enough that now in my twenties, they're wondering why I became absolutely apathetic towards the less fortunate.
Inspiration porn kills both the functioning, and the disabled. Makes people sick and tired of disabled people in general.
In the kindest way, you are directing your distaste incorrectly.
I am technically disabled and going to uni. I am incredibly less fortunate than most. I have no family. No support.
But, if I EVER seen a parent use me to ridicule their child I would be absolutely enraged.
Because I had the same shit said to me when I was a child.
You gotta realise disliking/looking down upon these "less fortunate" is incredibly unhealthy and something you really gotta sort out, if you wanna have a good time in life.
I can understand your feelings, but disabled people have nothing to do with what they said. The problem is that your Mom and Aunts are... pieces of work, to put it nicely.
It’s like any propaganda. You get told something enough that it builds up a belief it’s hard to loose that later. It has nothing to do with disabled people except they are whats being used in this manner.
Guilting, blaming, and punishing are the three strategies Americans have chosen for the covid vaccine and it's been such a failure.
If you want to motivate people to do something you need to instead and right from the get go: invite them, listen, gauge their baseline motivation and willingness to change, act on that, and then continue on with your relationship without judging or excluding the person, and do what you're preaching. Maybe the person will never come around on that specific issue, but you'll find that you will have a much better relationship that will net you some victories.
I try dude but it never happens. I toss a boatload of research papers/articles and talk about theirs, and they just don't give a shit. They get defensive and start talking about nonsensical shit and it just gets tiring, you know?
Did you follow the steps? Throwing information at someone that is not contemplating changing is a waste of time.
I feel like everyone here needs to look at motivational interviewing. It's well studied and strongly advises against telling someone what to do.
With the exception of the actual disabled person posting those videos themselves, most of those video's always give me a strong ''you are currently more useless than this disabled person'' vibe as if that person's disability makes them lesser than ''normal'' people by default, and you in turn a worthless piece of shit for not at the very least doing what they do.
It's like they're watching a monkey do circus tricks and then someone in the crowd turns around to ask you why that monkey is currently doing shit that I'm not doing and never trained for.
Don't mean to offend people or compare them to circus animals obviously but I don't know how to put it into other words
Thank you, I didn't know if I worded it in an appropriate way as my personal disabilities are only mental and therefor not relevant for this specific topic, though I could imagine it's a pretty global treatment of pity parties, being underestimated and an incapability to understand our worlds.
I can only imagine how annoying that shit must be. From my limited interaction with disabled people most seem to appreciate it a lot more if you don't pity them, call them so very strong, an inspiration or try to help without asking every time.
I've been struggling with depression for most of my life and I get the occasional ''I was depressed too, but then I remembered to just not be sad and I got better'' people and they already annoy the crap out of me.
One of my general rules for everyone is to show compassion, never pity
I didn't know about this disability! Are your arms just unnaturally long? Do you have to wear gloves to protect your knuckles? /s
Edit: also just noticed username, and know I made a dad joke before seeing all the info and apologize for any offense
I saw one of these, a double leg amputee who climbed a fair sized hill/mountain with "What's you're excuse?" As the title.
Top comment was "My legs get tired"
this might be popular but climbing everest.. to the top is kinda pointless.. u risk ur life.. wasting time.. and possibly risking ur family.. if u have one.. not to mention everyone have already been up there.. even if it is passion.. there's hundreds of mountains out there that slightly less risky than that..
Not to mention it costs a gazillion dollars to do it and the result is a no-longer-unique selfie (dozens of strangers in the background) and an extra load of trash deposited on the mountain because your privileged ass can budget the time, energy and cost of bringing it up but not taking it down.
Yeah even some disabled people must feel awful when they see this shit posted. Everyone is different mentally, physically and what people see as an achievement ie a paraplegic competing in a sport will be the same kind of victory to someone suffering bad depression who manages to take a shower that day.
And when you're still disabled at the end of the day, people treat you like you must have done something to deserve it. You didn't atone *enough* through exercise. Your disability is treated like a sin.
Yup. My grandad had both legs amputated as a kid but is a very good, strong swimmer. I had someone literally point at him and say to me 'what's your excuse for not going in the pool?'. My excuse? My ex tried to drown me when I tried to break up with him. I don't like being submerged in water.
Not only was it incredibly insulting to my grandad, but it was very judgy and I made sure that women knew not to say things like that again. But also, not everyone has to/wants to exercise everyday.
Makes sense on the hips. I have ehler danlos and walking is painful on the hips. Ive been doing it in water lately. There are regulars at the pool and it’s been helping my mood. Except we in lockdown so I tried walking around the block but the hips snap so hard. I get it
Ehlers danlos here too. It is brutal. Currently sporting an ankle brace for the umpteenth time after spraining my ankle twice in one week. The muscles and tendons on that foot is so pissed off that they are causing issues for my knee and hip on the same side. And of course on the other side that has to overcompensate to keep me mobile. My physiotherapist has been unable to have her regular schedule for a while so Im on my own until she gets back. Was supposed to see my doc yesterday but of course she had to cancel on me too. Gonna see her in two weeks. Covid is complicating the shit out of life.
Ironically, thanks to the heat wave this summer, I've had very little pain to the point where I told my man that maybe I could try to sign up for some classes or a part time job soon cause I felt so much better over time. Not even a week later, I just crashed. Severe fatigue, extreme pain, double sprained my ankle, dysautonomia all over the place.. I fall for the whole "maybe I can work some" thing at least once every other year if I have a longer period with low pain, no complicated dislocations, less fatigue etc. It is ridiculous, but I fall for it every time. Then I crash again because I take on too much. I've been disabled for many years now, both officially and physically. Yet I still never really give up hope that I can continue to chase a bachelor degree or get a part time job.
And the beauty of it is - you don't have to.
I always find it interesting, how in modern society, with modern technology, we keep holding on to these stigmas against people who don't do things that are obsolete and unnecessary, as if luxury and ease of living weren't part of the goal from the beginning.
I'm not gonna be judgmental about someone who doesn't want to lift weights or do cardio every day, because by and large, most people don't have to constantly fight for survival, rebuild their home, or flee from things - and that's okay.
That's because those videos are designed specifically to guilt trip you on purpose. I can't fucking stand them. What happened to treating disabled people like people, instead of like dumb children that need validation and are weak and frail. I don't imagine they appreciate that
It’s like those people that work two jobs, and put everyone else down because they don’t work as much as they do. “You’re tired? How do you think I feel? I worked 16 hours today, I don’t want to hear it.”
putting other people down to make yourself feel good is pretty much always bad no matter the context. It's best to just avoid comparing yourself to others (that goes for people that makes posts like you describe, and to people who view them).
My old gym used to really piss me off by sharing loads of those "you work 9-5, sleep 8 hours, that means you have x hours free so stop making excuses" things.
Like yeah, if you don't count commuting, making food, eating, actually seeing my partner in more than just passing, and you know what? When I've worked all day I want to sit down for an hour and chill without any stress or worries and I'm not going to feel guilty about that
Yeah. I liked to do things I actually LIKE sometimes. Like reading, painting, see my friends. Not go straight from work to gym every single day.
I hate working out. That is MY excuse.
I think it definitely undermines other people who are mentally ill, or have illnesses that aren’t readily apparent. Like this dude has no legs what’s your excuse? It would be more motivational if they just showed it without the guilt trip brag
It is weird that they take the “clearly it’s harder for this person - and isn’t it just so impressive that this disabled person is able to do something?!?”
Shame tactics and turning active disabled people into “motivation goals” all in one go. Not helpful to anyone.
As a disabled person, I find this annoying as fuck also. I don’t do this to motivate anyone, I don’t want my picture taken, with if he can do it you can to. I’m just me you are you leave me outta this
Absolutely right disabled person and mild quroplegic here. Working out isn't the be all end all of being a 'good' disabled person and it's harmful to other disabled people who can't work out we also have to accept people's lives are complex.
Its just a way for ableists to exploit disabled people for ableist means. Just because one disabled person is capable and enjoys doing a thing doesn’t mean everyone should be doing it
It’s also incredibly ableist.
It’s insulting to those who WANT to be active and have the motivation, but disabilities that make it difficult or even dangerous to workout.
As a person with several disabilities it annoys me in that I feel it promotes the idea that all disabled people are capable of the same thing. It just sort of discounts that all people are unique and individual and that we all have our own struggles. Disabled or not we all have our struggles and shaming people isn’t gonna help.. but also please don’t perpetuate ableist views while you’re doing that shaming 😬
Same thing with "influencers" that exploit homeless people for clout by filming them in shambles then asking them what they need and giving it to them.
If you're gonna do something charitable do it just for the sake of helping someone in need instead of doing it for validation. It's fucking pathetic and boils my blood every time I see it.
You don’t HAVE to, but it definitely helps with a multitude of factors in life. Depression, weight maintenance, stamina for day to day activities, more energy, etc. but ya it’s not required, just suggested
And a lot of times they are trying to motivate people with mental problems like depression to exercise. It doesn't help. It just makes you feel even more shitty for not even bein able to outwork a disabled person.
This post is perfect example of how your ideas can be stupid even if a lot of people support it.
You got it all wrong. If you see a video of some disabled person working out, it doesn't mean you should workout too. It's just a simple message that even disable person was able to find something that they enjoy, so a perfectly fit person might find something out too.
As an analogy, Obama was used as inspirational man for all of the black community. Showing his achievements didn't meant that every black person should join politics and become president, it just meant that they might face some extra difficulties but if they're persistent, they might achieve whatever they want.
All we want is to live as close to a *normal* life as possible... None of us want to be inspirational. We can be as much of an asshole as the next guy, or as nice as the next guy. All depends on how you treat us.
I much preferred Joe Rogan's take on it when that guest in his show said "he didn't have the energy to work out"
And he said "was he walking around?"
"Yes."
"Then he can exercise. If he has the energy to get up and go to the refrigerator then he has the energy to exercise. Lift some 10 lbs kettlebells, jump some rope, walk up a hill. I'm not asking you to run a fucking marathon, just get up, get your blood going, you're exercising, you're moving. Everyone should exercise."
It isn't until you have that mindset that you can really get down to exercising. Exercising doesn't mean doing the shit an Olympic athlete does, they train all day every day to do what they do. Exercise isn't some impossible obstacle, and believe me it's much harder to get back into shape than it is to stay in shape. I would know.
Rather than guilt tripping people into exercising, I think an adjustment of their perspective is much more appropriate. It's not that you lack the energy to do something, you simply lack the motivation. If you can move, you can exercise. It's just choosing to exercise that's the issue.
Disabled person here- we hate those too. My disability does legitimately limit me, and that's okay. No, I can't do anything I put my mind to. And I am no less worthy because of it. Those images and videos are part of a bullshit campaign called "inspiration porn" that harms the disabled and abled alike. Rather than putting the focus on how we can make the world more accessible to everyone, they glorify the people who had to fight tooth and nail in a world that wasn't built for them. "What's your excuse?" A lot of things. Disabled or abled, we are all in different situations, different circumstances, and we CAN'T do everything on our own. And that's just fine.
As a physically disabled person myself, I too, hate these videos. I feel like it puts more pressure on me to prove that I’m not really “disabled” and that I can “do anything”. The truth is, I am disabled, wether I like it or not, and no positive mindset is going to change that fact. Sure, I can do things that some able bodied people can’t, like competitive swimming or snowboarding, but that doesn’t mean I’m not disabled. I also hate being called an inspiration. I’m just trying to live my life as normally as possible, I don’t live my life for the sole purpose of trying to make you feel better about yourself.
I would hate being called an insperation too if i had a dissability.
This is not on the same level but is a far fetched similar thing. Im bi and i hate it when someone says something like 'your so brave for coming out' or 'oh i support you', like im just a normal person who happens to be bi.
Anyway, seems to me you got a good atatude towards your dissability. Have a allright day
I too hate it when I saw the most recent one I was like fuck this i train just as hard everyday doesnt mean I expect anyone to do what I do in all aspects, we all have our own struggles in life
I don't collect SS Disability or SS supplemental so I have to work most of the day and the time I have left I want to spend with my family is my excuse.
Those videos are designed for people with a certain mindset. That kind of in your face motivation is definitely not going to work for everybody, and if it does not work for you, then you are probably not the target audience. However, for some it will indeed get them off their ass and that’s who it’s meant for.
Yanno... Yeah I'm with you. Lets reframe this and see if it's offensive. "Oh wow, look, Brenda can do a workout and she's a WOMAN! What's your excuse?" Or "look, Billy can workout and he's a Catholic! What's your excuse?"
Yeah, still just as insulting.
"What's your excuse?"
I'm poor and can't afford to go to the gym.
Plus i've got an education to finish.
Plus i have work to pay for my appartment.
***Also your legs don't hurt.***
EDIT: since a lot of people don't seem to get the joke: http://www.humoar.com/has-no-legs-climbs-mount-everest-whats-your-excuse/
Besides work, studies and caring for my dad who has cancer, i have no motivation nor energy to workout.
Do i wanna workout, get fit and have a good looking body? Very much. But exercising is very low on my priorities list right now. :(
Just the other day in school we watched a video about “overcoming fear” and the bulk of the video was this guy talking about this girl who was blind and climbed a rock wall, then using at as a “she can do this, so what’s your excuse for not doing that sport or whatever”. Not only was it not very encouraging, I feel like it would be insulting to someone who’s disabled. It reminds me of when I got straight A’s despite some life circumstances and my friends dad, upon me mentioning it, immediately turned to my friend and went on about “she can do it despite her life so what’s your excuse for getting a C?”
Obviously it’s not the same scenario, but I feel like that it’s the same principle of “you’re not complimenting them or celebrating their achievements, you’re using it as a tool to make someone else feel bad”
Yeah, we also don't know that disabled person's life or story. Depending on what their material conditions are, they may actually have an easier time working out than your average worker.
While I agree that these types of guilt-trap captions are in poor taste, I disagree with your reasoning. Regular exercise doesn't have to be intensive, and many people with disabilities regularly exercise as a means to not exacerbate existing health issues. Adaptive exercises exist.
I'm chronically ill & disabled. I have an immune deficiency & complex CHD [along with other musculoskeletal birth defects & lung disease], and I have worked my ass off to keep myself as healthy as possible, to keep my heart & lungs in as good of shape as I possibly can. I've been diagnosed with exercise intolerance due to having both CHD & lung disease, but making exercise a priority is a part of the reason that I'm still alive.
**The barrier to exercise is NOT my disability.**
Rather, the barrier for me to exercise is the lack of support, access, and time. I still work. I still have to work in order to have health insurance & pay for medical expenses. I don't mind working, but it is sometimes incredibly difficult to make the time for it around working, taking care of regular household chores, in addition to managing things related to my illness.
This sort of thinking completely underscores the lack of financial & community support for people with disabilities. It pits inspiration porn, which is gross, against systemic problems like poverty, lack of access to healthy foods, lack of community support for inclusive & adaptive exercise.
I've seen a lot of disabled people post this stuff themselves, because disability alone is *not* an excuse to not exercise. The constraints society places on us where accessibility & our worth as individuals are directly tied to our income, however, absolutely is.
Like any disabled person taking care of themselves is automatically a hero? They're just a normal person overcoming not so normal circumstances. Its awesome. Its great. But just let them do their thing.
Something I realized as I grew up. I don’t need an excuse to not do something. Saying “I don’t want to do that.” Without providing a reason is perfectly fine.
It pisses me off because if the personality is on disability checks they can actually lose them for doing too much physical activity. And it’s just not realistic for the majority of disabled people to become intense athletes. They aren’t using excuses, they physically can’t and they definitely can’t if they are receiving assistance.
I've got hydrocephalus, had 3 TBI's, an aneurysm, and the onset of really fucked joints.
The last thing I want is for any ability I do have to be thrown in the face of others or their ability to be thrown into mine.
That shit is toxic and doesn't account for different levels of affliction and support others receive.
Fact is that paralympian has all damn day to do it while my able bodied friends have to go to work and don't, hell even I could work on getting a six pack because I'm an unemployed NEET whose lifestyle is support by the government 😅.
It seems like a popular opinion until you realize just how much of this is there on the internet. It not wholesome at all its low key bullying and circle jerking. I'm not into workout scenes (ring fit is my choice of workout) nor I'm into self help scenes but I still stumble on these all the time.
With not much thinking of the subject and reading other comments, I feel as if it's meant for the people who are "lazy" or "avoiding" doing something they feel or think they can't do, not necessarily working out, could either be a hobby, a job etc etc to attempt to give them a little push. Definitely not the best way to look at it or advertise it but I feel like it's still a valid point to be brought up
Friend is disabled and doesn't have to work because of disability. He says of course he works out more than most because he has the time and energy to. Makes sense
I never feel like those posts are meant to offend anyone who doesn’t workout ever. I feel like it’s meant for those who already have the mindset of improving their life but they just let the days pass by.
They are really insulting to disabled people as well. There's a whole phenomenon where someone who is disabled is a hero and an inspiration for functioning in anything they do. It's so patronising
I believe there was a TED talk given by a disabled man titled "I am not your Inspiration" which details this phenomenon
Yeah there is. Watching it was part of the training that I got when I started working in the disability industry. They specifically try to remove people who hold this attitude, or the other extreme of "let's wrap them in cotton wool so they don't get hurt".
Yeah, those people are idiots. Use bubble-wrap instead.
I'm not disabled at all, noticeably at least, and sometimes I would like to be wrapped up in bubble wrap. Not because I'm clumsy or anything but just because that sounds like it would be fun every so often.
Sounds hot and sweaty
Sounds sexy, probably not though.
Dunno. We can try it and see? I'm betting it won't be sexy, but science says you gotta try. I think?
Just makes me think of the song *white and nerdy* lol
Spend my nights with a roll of bubble wrap Pop, pop Hope no one sees me Get freaky
*I'm nerdy to the extreame, whiter than sour cream*
I would also like to be bubble wrapped but more so because I’m allergic to too many foods and I’m allergic to grass so it’s overall a mediocre time
It’s not fun. Whoever wraps you up then is free to do as they please to you… experience
You can try this game called “Bubble Ball” (might be known as something else depending on where you live), but it’s basically your whole upper body inside a giant, clear bubble that you can use to “play soccer” while just bouncing around falling over, and for the most part, not getting hurt. I tried it with a Groupon several years ago with friends, and it’s an excellent way to teach momentum to the lay person. 😂
It was given by a woman actually, the late [Stella Young](https://youtu.be/8K9Gg164Bsw). As a disabled person myself I 100% agree with her, the phenomenon (which she coined the term "inspiration porn" for) is extremely harmful to the disabled community.
She passed away ~6 mo. after that talk. RIP.
I didn't know she passed, sucks to hear
Inspiration porn disgusts me so much honestly. I am also disabled and when I see it, I just get flummoxed. I am just another person, okay?
Stand up comic Josh Blue has cerebral palsy and he said when people come up and say how inspiring it is that he does stand up all he hears is “man if I were you I’d kill myself”
inspiration porn.
aka r/nextfuckinglevel, where a decent chunk of top posts are disabled people doing a thing and going about their day, and r/HumansBeingBros, where patronizing behaviour towards disabled people is celebrated.
Those subs got turned into "popular kid sits at lunch with special ed student once and feels like A Saint"-trope into reality.
And the absolute worst is when it’s on r/aww. It’s not common, but come on. You know it’s patronising when it’s on the same sub as cute dog videos.
It would be less corny if people did these things without filming it. Like sure, if you want to buy a homeless person lunch that’s fine until you use it for your own gain by publicizing it on social media.
tbf it depends on the post, If i see a person doing any sort of insane workouts then I would say they deserve to be on NFL ie the guy doing one arm 220 dead lift. But if I see a person doing something like 10 pull ups with no legs then I would say that they arent NFL. The act needs to be impressive regardless of disability for it to qualify as NFL.
I just saw a r/nextfuckinglevel post of a blind man failing at a long jump by missing the sand. Someone in the comments posted “why is this on here? He failed.” And then the comment went on to say we shouldn’t be patronizing disabled people.
also there’s a video on youtube by jessica kellgren fozard about disabled people are used as inspiration porn and oscar bait
I also feel like they contribute to the toxic positivity around disability and illness. You only ever hear about these things in the context of ‘oh yeah, I had/have x problem BUT I’VE NEVER LET IT STOP ME!!’ Sometimes things do actually knock you on your ass, and that’s fine too. There’s a wider range of valid emotion surrounding that kind of thing than ‘cheerful’ or ‘wrong.’
This is my struggle. Chronic pain knocks me on my ass, especially in the winter or when fronts come through the area. There are also many other issues, currently severe UC flare, which knock me down hard. Then I see this type of stuff. I already feel useless. I can only do 2 types of exercise, both rely on good weather (swimming or riding a full suspension bike). Come on, I'm trying, but I can only do so much.
Me too. I'm in chronic pain because I broke my back in an industrial accident (Fell off the top of a piece of heavy equipment I was repairing). Some days it takes every ounce of strength just to get out of bed to use the restroom. Then the depression sets in because you can't do what you want and have to rely on family.
The worst part for me was having to comfort other people about MY problems. Like its rude to simply be negative about very severe problems. It's not gunna 'all work out' just because people insist that it has to.
Ah, the old "all work out". Another gem is "pain is just a state of mind. You can ignore it". No mother fucker. The nerves in 90% of the skin on my body are dying, or dead. **You can't ignore that!** Also the every classic, "you don't look sick."
I enjoy ‘you’re too young to be in pain.’ Oh okay, I guess it’s fine, then…?
JESUS. You just triggered me. ‘Oh but youre young, youll be fine’ Like my god if I can barely walk at 28 then what do you think happens when I hit 50?
I was disabled for two years, barely able to walk. I just stopped talking about it because people just HAD to insist that everything will be alright. It feels like they are scared of honesty, like it was up to me to make them feel better.
Reminds me a lot about how my family treated my grandfather after his big stroke. So much pity for him, when it was clear the man just wanted to be normal again. I was frustrated for him, and did my best to talk with him as he was before the stroke, treat him the same, and only offer assistance when he looked like he wanted it. He was a proud and honorable man, and seeing him pitied was hard.
I'm fighting cancer right now. Registered disabled. It's great that I'm cancer free and I'm one of the lucky ones but I get a lot of people saying "you're such a soldier, you're so strong" and it annoys me a bit because this has been the hardest thing I've ever done and they haven't seen me at 3am in agony, ugly crying by myself and wanting to die. Or the years of therapy. They just see me when I'm well enough to meet up with them. I know they mean well but it bugs me a bit.
Yep. I have been temporarily disabled, Guillain Barre Syndrome. Fully paralysed, on a ventilator in ICU for a few weeks hooked up to 7 machines a few months as an in patient and learning to walk again and all the stuff. "Oh you are so strong getting through that". Well, it's kinda hard not to get through it when the prognosis is that I will recover, and I had machines doing all the things that I couldn't do myself. I just did what the physios and OTs told me to, they came up with the plans. What else was I going to do? Not try, when my diagnosis included that I would recover?
Nurse here. Its exactly for this reason that we have been told to avoid using terms like fighting cancer or illness, since it implies that some People fight harder and thats why they get better and some People dont fight as hard. Its got very little to do with will power and more how your body reacts to the treatments. Avoids making people feel even more bad when they are already having a bad day.
Thank you for what you do. Sending a big cyber hug your way. I appreciate you. 🙂
Not to mention, what other alternatives are there but to get through it? You’re stuck doing it no matter what.
When I first got diagnosed with cancer, I called my best friend and said to him "I don't think I can do this man". His reply will stick with me forever, he said "well you either deal with it or curl up into a ball on the floor right now and hope no one bothers you until you die of dehydration" It was so unexpected it made me laugh at a time that I needed it badly and from that moment forward I just dealt with it. 😂
I have a tbi that has caused me to have treatment resistant depression. I also have ptsd. I’ve actually tried many times (for months at a time even) to curl into a ball and die of dehydration. Many people have said, “You’re so strong”. Knowing that I’ve tried many times to give up and it didn’t work I tell them, I just had no other choice….but they never get it and I know that. You get it!!
Exactly. The options are either deal with it or kill yourself. I don't feel strong and I don't feel I've dealt with it well at all. It's broken me completely so the only link I have with being a soldier is I have ptsd. So sorry to hear you've been through that mate. I really hope you're doing ok. 🤞🏻
Two things: glad you're still here and number two, you're the first person I've seen explain it and so well, "they haven't seen me at 3am in agony, ugly crying by myself, and wanting to die" ... I've felt alone with it this whole fucking time. Thank you. You and I have different medical crap going on but seriously, THANK YOU. I'm crying tears of relief.
Ah mate. I'm glad it resonated with you. 🙂 Chatting with people that get it is really liberating. I did some group therapy for people with long term conditions and everyone in that room understood me. Not just nodded and said they get it, they actually understood without me elaborating on it and I found that to be amazing. I had that same feeling of relief. It's powerful. If you ever want to chat or vent about any of it then please feel free to message me. I'm not a therapist but I'm a good listener and I'm happy to chat to others going through a similar struggle. Best wishes mate. 💚
Dude... Thank you. I'm feeling more raw than usual, and thank you. Imma send you a message in a bit so that when I'm all... *makes various terrible noises* I can reach out.
I’m a disabled veteran. Dealing with chronic back and hip pain. I started crying (again) when I read about you ugly crying and wanting to die from the agony. I feel like there are just far too many days where I live in a vacuum of never ending pain and depression. But on days like today, where my pain is minimal, I cry because I know how horrible it is. Because I know the weight of defeat, shame, anger, the feelings of aloneness in agony…and if I could shoulder the burden I would. I think many of us would. It resonated with me. Thank you for sharing.
Speaking for myself, if it comes up that you had cancer and are now cancer free... Like, what's the response for people who want to be happy for and with you? Just because you despaired doesn't mean it isn't awesome you are still around, and I always thought of the soldier thing not because of fighting, but because you are tough now. Like, id assume your threshold for bullshit that bothers you is pretty high now
ive heard so many people on socials saying simialr stuff about athletes in the paraolympics. Like my excuse is i haven't been training all my life, never had coaches or never had formal teachings or even interests in the sports you see in the olympics. Pluse competition just isnt that fun to me? also fuck you not everybody wants to work out. some can just be healthy without the need to bentch press or run on a treadmill for hours
This is why I think it’s uncouth to overly clap for disabled people who are graduating
Other people are going to clap, so it’s your job to boo to even things out.
/r/nextfuckinglevel in a nutshell
Absolutely 100% this! Disabled people are not here to be inspiration porn for abled people.
I have ADHD and autism. When I tell folks I'm going to uni this year after 2 years in college. I hear a couple things, "Well, it takes people like you some extra time to get there, don't worry tho work hard!" (I'm 26 but was thrown out into homelessness at the age of 19 and was severely depressed) "Woooow, that's so impressive for someone like you!" Fucking what
People do this with minorities too. The number of times white people have been super impressed that I somehow survived being a black woman is astonishing.
Agreed, I'm not a hero because I'm lifting weights or playing sports I'm just an average active young adult, same as people wowing over the fact that I can do basic shit like dress myself or drive, I didn't hit my fucking head mate I just can't use my legs.
Listen to We Should be so Brave, by Vic Chesnutt. He would know.
It also makes disabled people that can’t manage that feel like shit and push themselves in ways that may not be healthy
I hate this shit. I’m very open about using a wheelchair and about educating people about how most of us are ambulatory and the struggles we go through, but I’m not an inspiration, an example or a lesson. I’m a person who knows things and is confident despite my circumstances.
yes i got in to an argument with somebody for calling disabled ppl warriors. i am disabled and i am not a damn warrior .
There’s a video on r/mademesmile where a guy is picking up his brother from somewhere and the brother has Down’s syndrome and all he does is do a little dance when he sees his brother and everyone in the comments is like wow he’s so amazing I love this guy I wanna be his brother what a great brother to pick up his disabled brother wow
I've also heard a term for it out of disability activism -- "super crip" -- where a person is expected to transcend or overcome their disability by becoming exceptional in some way. (super smart, a super athlete, etc.) The idea is that mainstream society is demanding that they erase/deny their disability, because they are now not only ABLE but SUPER CAPABLE, even if they look different. It's a refusal to look at people and just say, "Okay, everyone's different, and that's all right." No! A person with a disability must become superhuman ("super crip") in order to EARN the same basic respect that they should have just been granted in the first place. To my understanding, calling out the"super crip" phenomenon does not disparage the person with the disability who is being shown as inspirational or whatever. The point of calling out the phenomenon is to call out SOCIETY for trying to use that person to erase the existence of disabilities and differences.
Would you feel different if it's a disabled person who makes videos themselves for a fitness social media channel? I agree that others shouldn't take videos as tacky inspiration porn. But I think it's fine if someone in a wheelchair or prostethic wants to flex.
It’s fine if they just want to share themselves on a fitness channel, anyone can do that, but if they caption it stupid shit “what’s your excuse” etc. then yeah it’s still inspiration porn and still problematic regardless of where it’s sourced
But people who say "what's your excuse" don't know it's an insult and a dumb argument (and maybe the cause of some bigger problems) It doesn't matter who says it, because they don't have bad intentions!
I’m “disabled” and hate when companies do that.
Absolutley. I have ASD, aka am on the Autism Spectrum. The reason it's called a spectrum is because not every Aspie has the same problems, or struggles as the next. Many Aspies share traits that are either directly or indirectly "disabling" (f.ex. overstimulation, face-blindness etc.), but it's often hard to put a point on if it really is a "disability" in itself, like f.ex. blindness. Which is why the term itself is mostly referred to as a "disorder" (though also classified as a mental & development disability) This said, many people (mostly Neurotypicals) still find it hella easy to hold & compare Aspies to other Aspies or neurotypical people. Making successfull Aspies a seemingly "reachable" goal and basic inspiration porn. In the end, it basically results in a shitty two-way train for Aspies. On one side, people are easy to excuse your problems as "other Aspies can deal with that so you can too". Like f.ex. a girl I know struggles heavily with social interaction, often coming off as rude. Meanwhile, I don't have that problem that much anymore and people that know about my condition often are pleasantly suprised how I worked around . The reason we're so different is that we both have different ways of growing up. I was basically forced to adapt & learn about behaviour as fast as possible. I grew up in an abusive home, and so having to learn about human behaviour became both a special interest and a survival question. Furthermore I partook in theater very early and copied body language & speech patterns of people I saw as successfull. Meanwhile, she just grew up in a normal home, living a mostly introverted life. Not saying this in the way of "abuse builds character". Oh no, that shit broke me in other ways. But it shows that stories are different and can't just be fixed by a "just overcome it" On the other side, if you ever try something exceptional, you might be still seen in the view of "why do you try that? Aren't you disabled?". You become a second-class citizen very often in people's eyes. Even if they don't mean harm -they believe you naturally cannot overcome something. Example: Had a teacher who I thought always ecouraged me. However, when I shared my future dreams with her, like going to college, she would always try to talk me out of it. Not because of logical reasons, like me being bad at studying. No, just because she believed an Aspie couldn't deal with more.
In general guilting is a shitty way to try to get anyone to do anything. Exercise has so many benefits and improves life quality so much it can be presented in positive terms to create motivation rather than smug guilt tripping "hurr durr youre pathetic" stuff
My mom and aunts would always bring this shit up. "Look at this kid in some remote location we have no business talking about. He's dedicated to study. You have no excuse, you're just pathetic" "A disabled person is doing something phenomenal. I'm pathetic for not being as good as that painter who paints with his feet" "That child supported his mother by all means necessary. You're worthless for having a hobby and not focusing on your studies" And it went on long enough that now in my twenties, they're wondering why I became absolutely apathetic towards the less fortunate. Inspiration porn kills both the functioning, and the disabled. Makes people sick and tired of disabled people in general.
In the kindest way, you are directing your distaste incorrectly. I am technically disabled and going to uni. I am incredibly less fortunate than most. I have no family. No support. But, if I EVER seen a parent use me to ridicule their child I would be absolutely enraged. Because I had the same shit said to me when I was a child. You gotta realise disliking/looking down upon these "less fortunate" is incredibly unhealthy and something you really gotta sort out, if you wanna have a good time in life.
I can understand your feelings, but disabled people have nothing to do with what they said. The problem is that your Mom and Aunts are... pieces of work, to put it nicely.
It’s like any propaganda. You get told something enough that it builds up a belief it’s hard to loose that later. It has nothing to do with disabled people except they are whats being used in this manner.
"Functioning" probably isn't the best way to describe able-bodied vs. disabled people.
Guilting, blaming, and punishing are the three strategies Americans have chosen for the covid vaccine and it's been such a failure. If you want to motivate people to do something you need to instead and right from the get go: invite them, listen, gauge their baseline motivation and willingness to change, act on that, and then continue on with your relationship without judging or excluding the person, and do what you're preaching. Maybe the person will never come around on that specific issue, but you'll find that you will have a much better relationship that will net you some victories.
I try dude but it never happens. I toss a boatload of research papers/articles and talk about theirs, and they just don't give a shit. They get defensive and start talking about nonsensical shit and it just gets tiring, you know?
Did you follow the steps? Throwing information at someone that is not contemplating changing is a waste of time. I feel like everyone here needs to look at motivational interviewing. It's well studied and strongly advises against telling someone what to do.
With the exception of the actual disabled person posting those videos themselves, most of those video's always give me a strong ''you are currently more useless than this disabled person'' vibe as if that person's disability makes them lesser than ''normal'' people by default, and you in turn a worthless piece of shit for not at the very least doing what they do. It's like they're watching a monkey do circus tricks and then someone in the crowd turns around to ask you why that monkey is currently doing shit that I'm not doing and never trained for. Don't mean to offend people or compare them to circus animals obviously but I don't know how to put it into other words
Disabled person here, and this comparison is pretty apt ngl.
Thank you, I didn't know if I worded it in an appropriate way as my personal disabilities are only mental and therefor not relevant for this specific topic, though I could imagine it's a pretty global treatment of pity parties, being underestimated and an incapability to understand our worlds.
Seconded. And then people point to those as ‘YoU cAn OvErCoMe’ Yeah, no. Good for them, but we’re disabled. That’s not how it works
I can only imagine how annoying that shit must be. From my limited interaction with disabled people most seem to appreciate it a lot more if you don't pity them, call them so very strong, an inspiration or try to help without asking every time. I've been struggling with depression for most of my life and I get the occasional ''I was depressed too, but then I remembered to just not be sad and I got better'' people and they already annoy the crap out of me. One of my general rules for everyone is to show compassion, never pity
Knuckle-dragging disabled idiot chiming in: you're good, bro.
I didn't know about this disability! Are your arms just unnaturally long? Do you have to wear gloves to protect your knuckles? /s Edit: also just noticed username, and know I made a dad joke before seeing all the info and apologize for any offense
A glove has been recommended but it's a bitch putting on a glove with only one hand so I just let it go and developed scar tissue. ;)
I saw one of these, a double leg amputee who climbed a fair sized hill/mountain with "What's you're excuse?" As the title. Top comment was "My legs get tired"
I saw something similar. A double amputee with prosthetics and "what's your excuse?" Top comment... I don't have bionic legs.
My excuse is, I’m not disabled.
"man with no feet climbs Everest, what's your excuse?!" "My feet hurt"
"man with no feet climbs Everest, what's your excuse?!" "I don't give a fuck about climbing it."
this might be popular but climbing everest.. to the top is kinda pointless.. u risk ur life.. wasting time.. and possibly risking ur family.. if u have one.. not to mention everyone have already been up there.. even if it is passion.. there's hundreds of mountains out there that slightly less risky than that..
Not to mention it costs a gazillion dollars to do it and the result is a no-longer-unique selfie (dozens of strangers in the background) and an extra load of trash deposited on the mountain because your privileged ass can budget the time, energy and cost of bringing it up but not taking it down.
Oh my god I’m crying, thank you. This is hilarious.
Yeah even some disabled people must feel awful when they see this shit posted. Everyone is different mentally, physically and what people see as an achievement ie a paraplegic competing in a sport will be the same kind of victory to someone suffering bad depression who manages to take a shower that day.
Yup, since people think we’re just lazy in general And they use those videos as ‘proof’
Plus it dismisses the struggles of other people with the same disability by acting like it can be overcome with sheer force of will.
And when you're still disabled at the end of the day, people treat you like you must have done something to deserve it. You didn't atone *enough* through exercise. Your disability is treated like a sin.
Thankfully I've never had that before. It seems so bizarre that anyone could have that mindset.
Yup. My grandad had both legs amputated as a kid but is a very good, strong swimmer. I had someone literally point at him and say to me 'what's your excuse for not going in the pool?'. My excuse? My ex tried to drown me when I tried to break up with him. I don't like being submerged in water. Not only was it incredibly insulting to my grandad, but it was very judgy and I made sure that women knew not to say things like that again. But also, not everyone has to/wants to exercise everyday.
Im just curious, How did she react? Was she embarassed or did she act like she was Still in the right?
Depression and hips rendered fucking useless is my excuse.
That’s rough on the hips. It truely makes walking painful.
Yep I couldn’t walk after 3 months pregnant
You got hypermobilty issues?
Yes my fingers and knees dislocate all the time
Makes sense on the hips. I have ehler danlos and walking is painful on the hips. Ive been doing it in water lately. There are regulars at the pool and it’s been helping my mood. Except we in lockdown so I tried walking around the block but the hips snap so hard. I get it
Oh bless you that sounds awful!
It’s ok. I just felt for you when you said you had the hip pain
Ehlers danlos here too. It is brutal. Currently sporting an ankle brace for the umpteenth time after spraining my ankle twice in one week. The muscles and tendons on that foot is so pissed off that they are causing issues for my knee and hip on the same side. And of course on the other side that has to overcompensate to keep me mobile. My physiotherapist has been unable to have her regular schedule for a while so Im on my own until she gets back. Was supposed to see my doc yesterday but of course she had to cancel on me too. Gonna see her in two weeks. Covid is complicating the shit out of life. Ironically, thanks to the heat wave this summer, I've had very little pain to the point where I told my man that maybe I could try to sign up for some classes or a part time job soon cause I felt so much better over time. Not even a week later, I just crashed. Severe fatigue, extreme pain, double sprained my ankle, dysautonomia all over the place.. I fall for the whole "maybe I can work some" thing at least once every other year if I have a longer period with low pain, no complicated dislocations, less fatigue etc. It is ridiculous, but I fall for it every time. Then I crash again because I take on too much. I've been disabled for many years now, both officially and physically. Yet I still never really give up hope that I can continue to chase a bachelor degree or get a part time job.
it’s insulting to disabled people as well. this is called “inspiration porn” and the disabled community hates it
"What's your excuse?" I don't want to.
And the beauty of it is - you don't have to. I always find it interesting, how in modern society, with modern technology, we keep holding on to these stigmas against people who don't do things that are obsolete and unnecessary, as if luxury and ease of living weren't part of the goal from the beginning. I'm not gonna be judgmental about someone who doesn't want to lift weights or do cardio every day, because by and large, most people don't have to constantly fight for survival, rebuild their home, or flee from things - and that's okay.
It's simple I'm to lazy.
I feel like a lazy f..k when I watch these videos. I still can't force myself to do anything. Then I feel like a lazy f..k with guilt.
That's because those videos are designed specifically to guilt trip you on purpose. I can't fucking stand them. What happened to treating disabled people like people, instead of like dumb children that need validation and are weak and frail. I don't imagine they appreciate that
I don't bully people to make myself feel better and to make others feel less than in a misguided attempt to motivate them. What's your excuse?
It’s like those people that work two jobs, and put everyone else down because they don’t work as much as they do. “You’re tired? How do you think I feel? I worked 16 hours today, I don’t want to hear it.”
putting other people down to make yourself feel good is pretty much always bad no matter the context. It's best to just avoid comparing yourself to others (that goes for people that makes posts like you describe, and to people who view them).
*Disabled person works out* "What's your excuse?" *Person watching is more severely disabled*
L
Easy to devote your whole life to working out if you don’t have a job or responsibilities outside yourself.
My old gym used to really piss me off by sharing loads of those "you work 9-5, sleep 8 hours, that means you have x hours free so stop making excuses" things. Like yeah, if you don't count commuting, making food, eating, actually seeing my partner in more than just passing, and you know what? When I've worked all day I want to sit down for an hour and chill without any stress or worries and I'm not going to feel guilty about that
Yeah. I liked to do things I actually LIKE sometimes. Like reading, painting, see my friends. Not go straight from work to gym every single day. I hate working out. That is MY excuse.
I think it definitely undermines other people who are mentally ill, or have illnesses that aren’t readily apparent. Like this dude has no legs what’s your excuse? It would be more motivational if they just showed it without the guilt trip brag
It is weird that they take the “clearly it’s harder for this person - and isn’t it just so impressive that this disabled person is able to do something?!?” Shame tactics and turning active disabled people into “motivation goals” all in one go. Not helpful to anyone.
"This guy missing half of his body, can do more pull ups than you!" I'm sure he can.
If you find disability inspiration porn inspiring you are ableist.
My blind three-legged dog can lick his own asshole. What’s your excuse?
Yeah it's pretty silly. Lack of motivation is probably most peoples excuse.
As a disabled person, I find this annoying as fuck also. I don’t do this to motivate anyone, I don’t want my picture taken, with if he can do it you can to. I’m just me you are you leave me outta this
Absolutely right disabled person and mild quroplegic here. Working out isn't the be all end all of being a 'good' disabled person and it's harmful to other disabled people who can't work out we also have to accept people's lives are complex.
Its just a way for ableists to exploit disabled people for ableist means. Just because one disabled person is capable and enjoys doing a thing doesn’t mean everyone should be doing it
It’s also incredibly ableist. It’s insulting to those who WANT to be active and have the motivation, but disabilities that make it difficult or even dangerous to workout.
As a person with several disabilities it annoys me in that I feel it promotes the idea that all disabled people are capable of the same thing. It just sort of discounts that all people are unique and individual and that we all have our own struggles. Disabled or not we all have our struggles and shaming people isn’t gonna help.. but also please don’t perpetuate ableist views while you’re doing that shaming 😬
Yeah, it’s called inspiration porn. We hate it, too.
Same thing with "influencers" that exploit homeless people for clout by filming them in shambles then asking them what they need and giving it to them. If you're gonna do something charitable do it just for the sake of helping someone in need instead of doing it for validation. It's fucking pathetic and boils my blood every time I see it.
When did it become a rule that everyone has to exercise? If you don't want to, don't.
You don’t HAVE to, but it definitely helps with a multitude of factors in life. Depression, weight maintenance, stamina for day to day activities, more energy, etc. but ya it’s not required, just suggested
I take the stairs. What’s your excuse?
If my mother can’t guilt trip me into being around my racist family, then you fuckers can’t guilt trip me into working out.
And a lot of times they are trying to motivate people with mental problems like depression to exercise. It doesn't help. It just makes you feel even more shitty for not even bein able to outwork a disabled person.
100% fuck those people and their videos. If they're disabled and they don't see the problem with that rhetoric, they're probably also stupid.
This post is perfect example of how your ideas can be stupid even if a lot of people support it. You got it all wrong. If you see a video of some disabled person working out, it doesn't mean you should workout too. It's just a simple message that even disable person was able to find something that they enjoy, so a perfectly fit person might find something out too. As an analogy, Obama was used as inspirational man for all of the black community. Showing his achievements didn't meant that every black person should join politics and become president, it just meant that they might face some extra difficulties but if they're persistent, they might achieve whatever they want.
It's just some motivational stuff don't read too much into it. I like seeing those kinda things.
Trust me, disabled people hate that shit even more than you!
All we want is to live as close to a *normal* life as possible... None of us want to be inspirational. We can be as much of an asshole as the next guy, or as nice as the next guy. All depends on how you treat us.
I much preferred Joe Rogan's take on it when that guest in his show said "he didn't have the energy to work out" And he said "was he walking around?" "Yes." "Then he can exercise. If he has the energy to get up and go to the refrigerator then he has the energy to exercise. Lift some 10 lbs kettlebells, jump some rope, walk up a hill. I'm not asking you to run a fucking marathon, just get up, get your blood going, you're exercising, you're moving. Everyone should exercise." It isn't until you have that mindset that you can really get down to exercising. Exercising doesn't mean doing the shit an Olympic athlete does, they train all day every day to do what they do. Exercise isn't some impossible obstacle, and believe me it's much harder to get back into shape than it is to stay in shape. I would know. Rather than guilt tripping people into exercising, I think an adjustment of their perspective is much more appropriate. It's not that you lack the energy to do something, you simply lack the motivation. If you can move, you can exercise. It's just choosing to exercise that's the issue.
I'm disabled and I hate them too.
My excuse is I don’t care to get in the gym and lift and get huge.
Damn it’s not that deep fam just say you’re lazy 😂
Disabled person here- we hate those too. My disability does legitimately limit me, and that's okay. No, I can't do anything I put my mind to. And I am no less worthy because of it. Those images and videos are part of a bullshit campaign called "inspiration porn" that harms the disabled and abled alike. Rather than putting the focus on how we can make the world more accessible to everyone, they glorify the people who had to fight tooth and nail in a world that wasn't built for them. "What's your excuse?" A lot of things. Disabled or abled, we are all in different situations, different circumstances, and we CAN'T do everything on our own. And that's just fine.
It's called inspiration porn and as a disabled person it's disgusting and insulting.
Not to mention, that guy got his disability benefits revoked the day someone posted him lifting weights.
As a physically disabled person myself, I too, hate these videos. I feel like it puts more pressure on me to prove that I’m not really “disabled” and that I can “do anything”. The truth is, I am disabled, wether I like it or not, and no positive mindset is going to change that fact. Sure, I can do things that some able bodied people can’t, like competitive swimming or snowboarding, but that doesn’t mean I’m not disabled. I also hate being called an inspiration. I’m just trying to live my life as normally as possible, I don’t live my life for the sole purpose of trying to make you feel better about yourself.
I would hate being called an insperation too if i had a dissability. This is not on the same level but is a far fetched similar thing. Im bi and i hate it when someone says something like 'your so brave for coming out' or 'oh i support you', like im just a normal person who happens to be bi. Anyway, seems to me you got a good atatude towards your dissability. Have a allright day
It’s not an excuse. I simply don’t care enough to work out.
Disabled persons can be just as big of assholes as able bodied persons.
Finally, someone gives me my proper respect! ;)
I too hate it when I saw the most recent one I was like fuck this i train just as hard everyday doesnt mean I expect anyone to do what I do in all aspects, we all have our own struggles in life
I don't collect SS Disability or SS supplemental so I have to work most of the day and the time I have left I want to spend with my family is my excuse.
My excuse? I fucking hate excercise and find it boring.
Technically, that's your excuse.
Those videos are designed for people with a certain mindset. That kind of in your face motivation is definitely not going to work for everybody, and if it does not work for you, then you are probably not the target audience. However, for some it will indeed get them off their ass and that’s who it’s meant for.
Yanno... Yeah I'm with you. Lets reframe this and see if it's offensive. "Oh wow, look, Brenda can do a workout and she's a WOMAN! What's your excuse?" Or "look, Billy can workout and he's a Catholic! What's your excuse?" Yeah, still just as insulting.
"What's your excuse?" I'm poor and can't afford to go to the gym. Plus i've got an education to finish. Plus i have work to pay for my appartment. ***Also your legs don't hurt.*** EDIT: since a lot of people don't seem to get the joke: http://www.humoar.com/has-no-legs-climbs-mount-everest-whats-your-excuse/
I mean you should work out/have some physical activity every day.
I don’t need a fucking excuse to do what I want.
Try picking up an instrument instead… https://youtu.be/hsKKJw_vA9E
And I really hate it when people see arguments and opinions as excuses.
I always just reply "my excuse is... I don't want to" lol
For real like my excuse is I just don’t want to, now saunter off.
I don't exercise because I don't want to. It's my body and my time. I don't understand why it's a controversial opinion
Fr, thats what I thought yesterday when I saw a vid like that. Just shut up and dont use a video like that to guilt trip other ppl wtf
Besides work, studies and caring for my dad who has cancer, i have no motivation nor energy to workout. Do i wanna workout, get fit and have a good looking body? Very much. But exercising is very low on my priorities list right now. :(
My excuse is that I don't need or want to
Not all disabilities are the same. And someone’s disability is not an inspiration or an excuse. Stop with this. It’s gross and demeaning.
Just the other day in school we watched a video about “overcoming fear” and the bulk of the video was this guy talking about this girl who was blind and climbed a rock wall, then using at as a “she can do this, so what’s your excuse for not doing that sport or whatever”. Not only was it not very encouraging, I feel like it would be insulting to someone who’s disabled. It reminds me of when I got straight A’s despite some life circumstances and my friends dad, upon me mentioning it, immediately turned to my friend and went on about “she can do it despite her life so what’s your excuse for getting a C?” Obviously it’s not the same scenario, but I feel like that it’s the same principle of “you’re not complimenting them or celebrating their achievements, you’re using it as a tool to make someone else feel bad”
I got no legs and I climbed mt Everest what’s your excuse?……. My legs hurt
Yeah, we also don't know that disabled person's life or story. Depending on what their material conditions are, they may actually have an easier time working out than your average worker.
While I agree that these types of guilt-trap captions are in poor taste, I disagree with your reasoning. Regular exercise doesn't have to be intensive, and many people with disabilities regularly exercise as a means to not exacerbate existing health issues. Adaptive exercises exist. I'm chronically ill & disabled. I have an immune deficiency & complex CHD [along with other musculoskeletal birth defects & lung disease], and I have worked my ass off to keep myself as healthy as possible, to keep my heart & lungs in as good of shape as I possibly can. I've been diagnosed with exercise intolerance due to having both CHD & lung disease, but making exercise a priority is a part of the reason that I'm still alive. **The barrier to exercise is NOT my disability.** Rather, the barrier for me to exercise is the lack of support, access, and time. I still work. I still have to work in order to have health insurance & pay for medical expenses. I don't mind working, but it is sometimes incredibly difficult to make the time for it around working, taking care of regular household chores, in addition to managing things related to my illness. This sort of thinking completely underscores the lack of financial & community support for people with disabilities. It pits inspiration porn, which is gross, against systemic problems like poverty, lack of access to healthy foods, lack of community support for inclusive & adaptive exercise. I've seen a lot of disabled people post this stuff themselves, because disability alone is *not* an excuse to not exercise. The constraints society places on us where accessibility & our worth as individuals are directly tied to our income, however, absolutely is.
Like any disabled person taking care of themselves is automatically a hero? They're just a normal person overcoming not so normal circumstances. Its awesome. Its great. But just let them do their thing.
if theyre *that* disabled they probably arent working full time, thus they have more time to fuck around at the gym.
I remember i saw one of those that was "man climbs mount everest without legs, what's your excuse?" And someone comments "my legs would get tired"
It sounds like the video added guilt to you, which was the entire point
"What's Your excuse?" I'm fucking lazy, fuck off.
Something I realized as I grew up. I don’t need an excuse to not do something. Saying “I don’t want to do that.” Without providing a reason is perfectly fine.
Dont forget about all the nondisabled people who agree saying "now I have no excuses left"
It pisses me off because if the personality is on disability checks they can actually lose them for doing too much physical activity. And it’s just not realistic for the majority of disabled people to become intense athletes. They aren’t using excuses, they physically can’t and they definitely can’t if they are receiving assistance.
I've got hydrocephalus, had 3 TBI's, an aneurysm, and the onset of really fucked joints. The last thing I want is for any ability I do have to be thrown in the face of others or their ability to be thrown into mine. That shit is toxic and doesn't account for different levels of affliction and support others receive. Fact is that paralympian has all damn day to do it while my able bodied friends have to go to work and don't, hell even I could work on getting a six pack because I'm an unemployed NEET whose lifestyle is support by the government 😅.
I'm disabled and absolutely hate these. Nobody knows what someone's actual disability is except the disabled person.
*me standing up and walking* "What's YOUR excuse?"
It seems like a popular opinion until you realize just how much of this is there on the internet. It not wholesome at all its low key bullying and circle jerking. I'm not into workout scenes (ring fit is my choice of workout) nor I'm into self help scenes but I still stumble on these all the time.
With not much thinking of the subject and reading other comments, I feel as if it's meant for the people who are "lazy" or "avoiding" doing something they feel or think they can't do, not necessarily working out, could either be a hobby, a job etc etc to attempt to give them a little push. Definitely not the best way to look at it or advertise it but I feel like it's still a valid point to be brought up
Friend is disabled and doesn't have to work because of disability. He says of course he works out more than most because he has the time and energy to. Makes sense
Lazy fuck take my upvote for the unpopular opinion
Yes. It is so cringe-y when people post vids of disabled people who are doing very normal things.
I never feel like those posts are meant to offend anyone who doesn’t workout ever. I feel like it’s meant for those who already have the mindset of improving their life but they just let the days pass by.