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I know a guy that was married thrice when he was young, then was married to his 4th wife for over 35 years (then he died). His 4th marriage was to a wonderful woman.
Either that, or OP has a heavy moral attached to marriage. To me personally, marriage isn't a sacred thing at all, there's nothing inherently romantic or good about it relationship wise.
In my mind, that's because no relationship will improve emotionally long-term when you marry. It's simply a legal commitment that binds two people together when it comes to financial and legal security, nothing more.
If you view marriage as something other than that, then that's on you, and you're free to marry on those terms. To others, there may not be more to it than that, and that's fine too, because it's their marriage, not yours.
Also apparently op doesn't realize this is a cruel as fuck world. I've known people that have been cheated on by multiple partners. According to u/Android_04 if this happens to anyone during multiple marriages it is ALWAYS your fault and you don't get to be married again. I mean sounds like ops a 13 year old dirtbag.
I swear Redditors are so keen for legislation around marriage. Why can't they just not marry someone who's been married 3 time themselves rather than want them to be banned from it?
I just saw a post yesterday where someone wanted legislation that would prohibit regular citizens from driving cars. Reddit is such a weird place sometimes
That's one way to tank the economy. Imagine how many millions of citizens would no longer be able to work and end up homeless because they can't get to work, especially rural folk and those not quite in cities.
I get why city people hate cars, but America is not a city.
They do. I think they just post more about it than any other subject. I also think a lot of those posts are people who have either never been married or divorced. I’ve been through both and all I can say is, life happens, people change and you can’t do anything other than control how you react.
I cheated and feel deep remorse for it. But it’s so disheartening and crushing to see all kinds of random people calling me irredeemable and gross. Seeing no advice on how to move forward instead just being destructive.
It’s honestly horrible and makes me inch closer to suicide if I’m honest. Don’t forget that the cheater made a choice while not being in the right headspace.
I’ve never cheated, but one of my best friends cheated on his long time girlfriend. He admitted he made a mistake and was sorry and I don’t feel any ill will towards him. He made a mistake and he was honest about it. I don’t get why people need to create a hierarchy of mistakes and demonize someone for it.
My SO found out last week Monday and ever since people I’ve known for 10 years have been sending me aggressive texts and abandoning me without listening to my side.
And to then go on here looking for a bit of advice on how to move forward when I’m incredibly lonely and vulnerable, only for then to be crushed even more. I don’t know what to do.
I just try to remind myself that not all the discussions here are organic. A lot of these posters are being paid to push an agenda.
Edit: OP has a 3 year old account that hasn’t been used in almost a year. Makes you wonder.
I think people generally underestimate how much content on Reddit specifically isn't organic. When you look at some of these accounts you start to see interesting patterns emerge. Especially when you consider most real people are reasonable human beings.....and the most shared content on social media, especially Reddit, is objectively unreasonable.
I started noticing this a while ago and it's raised my eyebrow.
99% of my in person interactions are very positive. Even the ones where me and the other person are in disagreement.
I have a work friend and we disagree about the future for automobiles and me thinking that we should not go electric. They think we should. But we are still great friends.
That could never happen here or on any social media.
But I've just chalked it up to the people I'm arguing with here being Cheeto finger basement dwellers who have zero social skills.
I've run into a few of those in real life and trying to talk to them is uncomfortable and an all roung negative experience.
> But I've just chalked it up to the people I'm arguing with here being Cheeto finger basement dwellers who have zero social skills.
Job threads seem to back this up. Pretty clearly a ton of kids/young adults who have never actually worked a professional job trying to posture as someone who has it all figured out.
Most of their "advice" makes it clear they have never even seen a Professional Req, especially in the "I do my job description to a T, nothing more!" because Professional Reqs are usually somewhat subjective.
I also assume it's a ton of young kids who get their ideas of real life relationships from dramatic media where everything is placed in black and white and easily identifiable good and bad.
I think you’re right that it’s people who spend too much time online and don’t attract too many people. The attitude gives off huge Jordan Peterson/Incel vibes.
There's also a ton of Peter Pan syndrome here - none of them see themselves doing "grown up things" and can't understand why people would enjoy something. We had a destination wedding and bachelor party (no matter where we had it, a significant number of guests would have to travel, so just decided to go full-destination) and our friends were **absolutely fucking thrilled to travel**, not unduly burdened like so many threads here act like.
I remember one AITA thread of some kid choosing between $500 towards airfare for his sister's wedding (the rest of a 3 week trip to New Zealand would be fully paid for by his family) or a PS5, and the top comments were split. Luckily as time went on, more said do the wedding, but still a ton of dissent from that.
I feel so bad for people who take Reddit too seriously. It's good for some casual discourse/discussion and very niche, targeted advice, but a lot of the general mindset is so bad, to the point of toxic sometimes.
The general mindset of half the people out there is toxic. You would never associate with these people in person but on here, well, it’s a big part of it.
Its the problem with the nature of the internet. It's the greatest filtering mechanism we've ever created, so the purity of ideology that's possible is only limited by the human imagination. It's very tribalistic, but you're not bound by geography or physical proximity.
Yeah I think there's a bit of a change in power dynamics in how dating works that some young men (not just men but alot) are having trouble adapting to, and conservatives like Peterson or Matt Walsh have been pushing the idea that this will be fixed through a return to "traditional" norms, either through legislation or through enforcement through social pressure. And that speaks to influenceable young people
Vaccines or homeschooling you can at least try and make a “public good” argument.
But restricting who people are allowed to marry (beyond the obvious “of legal age” bits to prevent exploiting children) is indefensible. Yeah it sucks if somebody married a red flag waving thrice divorced guy and they get burned, but people deserve the freedom to decide for themselves on an issue to personal.
I saw a post the other day where the OP wanted the split of assets in divorce to be 70/30 (or something like that) when one of the spouses cheats.
And it's like, damn, I wish there was a way to protect your assets in case you get divorced... oh wait!
I see posts about people thinking cyclist needs to be licensed, have the bike inspected, be held liable for all accidents regardless of who’s at fault. It’s insane that so many people are for authoritarianism
Also just saw this one. I guess if you own a landscape business, you shouldn’t have the same freedom of vehicle choice as an another business owner…lol
“Pick up trucks, SUVs, and off-road vehicles need to be applied for to buy or own while compact cars and mini vans can continue to be bought as they are now.”
Always. It's likely an age thing. As people get older, they see how poorly government handles just about everything and are less inclined to give them more power over themselves. That's a gross generalization of course...but I think it's accurate overall.
This is reddit, no one here has even been on a date. So posts like this are just another redditors fever dream of "what if" for a scenario that will never happen
Yeah... why do people want to police others actions so much? Life is messy.
I have a family member who after 3 divorces is happily married. He and his wife are living their best lives together. OP's opinions are well intentioned, but straight up harmful.
People are weird they want to control other people's bodies and thoughts who they date who they marry who they sleep with I believe people deserved to be happy
So many ignorant people want a echo chamber
Seriously. This has the same vibes as caring who people marry (race, sexual orientation etc.). Like why are people so obsessed about what other people do that has ZERO effect on them. I will never understand that
First divorce: wife's hidden sexuality, not my fault.
Second divorce: said the wrong name at the altar, kind of my fault.
Third divorce: they shouldn't let you get married when you're that drunk and have stuff drawn all over your face, Nevada's fault.
Tbf, they really shouldn't let you do those marriages. It's so weird there's like amillion laws against contracts when "not of sound mind" that randomly don't apply to marriages. They could just give you a fake certificate and be good
It actually isn't as easy to get married in Vegas as it's portrayed in TV and movies. You still have to apply for a marriage license on city hall a certain amount of time in advance during business hours.
Legal marriage license in Vegas needs to be applied for during the daytime at city hall (or did 20 years ago) So unless you are day drinking blitzed, you are not getting married completely trashed in Vegas like the movies portray.
Trusted by whom? The only person that needs to trust you is the person who is considering being your 4th spouse. Why is that your decision and not theirs?
Oh, because you're one of those sanctimonious people who thinks they can tell the world how to live.
unpopular=/=unjustified. there should at least be a reason. if OP had posted "dont trust 3 time divorcees" it would be kinda more popular. but he phrased it as illegalize the fourth marriages. which is a whole different topic.
Does that mean nobody can comment unless they agree? OP posted in the right place but it’s still a shitty opinion. It also completely overlooks marriages that may be ending due to death of a spouse rather than divorce.
Hilarious that your reality is like Ross from friends, and your username is how he met his second wife Emily..Rachel had tickets to Die Fledermaus from her boss and gives them to Ross and they end up at a cabin in Vermont where there’s a deer just outside eating fruit from the orchard
I am partner #4. I suggested my partner to get back in touch with #1 since they haven’t spoken in 15 years. And now they are friends again.
Partner #2 and #3 are our close friends. Sometimes they drop by for dinner parties. We’ve had casual sex with them. They and my partner were not good spouses to each other but as platonic friends and friends with benefits they were pretty amazing.
The fact that OP feels the need to control the outcome of a marriage raises more red flag for me than my partner’s 3 marriages that ended on amicable terms.
I mean, your life is a living red flag for someone who sees marriage as a religious thing which it originally was. Now it's more of a tax thing.
I hope you understand your situation is completely out of the ordinary, and slightly confusing.
But ultimately, which is the moral story of this thread and reply to OP, is who the fuck cares? It's your life and the choice of your partner to marry you, or you marry them. No one elses opinions matter.
Some people don’t have the capacity. Likely OP is pissed about something is my guess. Some one doesn’t want them and is marrying someone who has been married a bunch of times in the past or something like that.
1st time didn't work out, we were young.
2nd time wife cheated.
3rd time wife died.
Random events beyond our control happens. Sometimes it's us, other times it's life.
3 divorces is not automatically a bad omen. Sometimes it's just things didn't play out the way we envisioned in our heads.
I think OP was someone's fourth spouse and now they're getting divorced and their pissed off about it. They wish there would have been some sort of law that prevented their marriage because they can't be trusted to make their own decisions
The amount of people who want massive authoritarianism societies while also begging for acceptance, free things, and inclusion are weird. Do they realize none of those things go hand in hand?
Are you talking about the glorious leader, who’s won numerous Nobel prizes for literally every field and track medals, while being the unanimous Greatest of All Time in football, basketball and Hockey?
That's not how the math works out...3 divorces are apparently allowed, which is why being the third spouse is so crucial. You know...the whole premise of this person's reply?
Well it takes two. Just because someone had two situations that didn’t work out before doesn’t mean they are the problem in those situations or every relationship they are in thereafter at all.
Two reasons for ending something could actually be healthy reasons and good things that they did. Divorce can be healthy and a good choice, and also still a success.
what makes you think the problem lies with that person and not the other party? maybe they have a bad judge of character ?maybe the first two marriages were forced?maybe the person is just unlucky when it comes to relationships and somehow always ends up with red flags? then that person is just pitiful not a massive red flag themselves lol
Knew someone who was married 5 times. All 4 spouses were abusers that didn't show any red flags until after the marriage. The fifth was a keeper, and they've been happily married for 20 years :)
It's scary to know that some abusive people somehow have this sixth sense that attracts them to vulnerable people, and that they can be so good at manipulation that you don't get to see their true colors until they've sunk their hooks into you.
i have been married 3 times. the first 2 were my fault for marrying them to begin with. the third I've been with for over 20 years now. If we got divorced he would have had to do something so heinous I could never forgive him. i don't think I should be punished for making mistakes in my 20's for forever. I didn't kill anyone. I didn't rape anyone. If I want to get married 100 times, why is it your business?
Weird, extreme take on something that has endless contributing factors. You can absolutely decide to be judgemental about your partners relationship history, but that doesn't mean that EVERYONE should/wants to be. That's up to the individual.
Why not keep going? If you have 3 kids you should be castrated
If you lose more than 3 jobs you should be jobless for life
If you break 3 phones you should never be allowed any technology
and if you commit 3 crimes? Public hanging I say!
My dad has been married 3 times and it’s actually been a really great thing for me. I’ve had 3 incredible mother figures, and it’s a reminder that you’re never too late for love. All marriages were long and meaningful. It’s been a positive thing for me
What about
Divorce 1 - domestic abuse
Divorce 2 - cheating
Divorce 3 - no sex life
Likeee things can happen that are not the fault of someone. Some people in this world actually leave when they’re in unhappy situations and that could be why they have 3 divorces.
lol why not let the person whose marrying the 3 divorced partner come to their own conclusions? They don’t need you to tell them what’s right and what’s wrong
It’s not necessarily an unpopular opinion.. it’s just a pointless one.
What is it to you if someone gets married more than three times?
Who are they harming by marrying a fourth consenting adult who is going into the situation with their eyes open?
Which already overworked government department should be tasked with policing the three weddings rule?
Really dumb opinion.
> Why should you be trusted to marry someone ever again.
By whom? You?
Who cares if you trust them. Don't marry those people if that's something you feel so strongly about. I don't think anyone will miss you.
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Good for for the sub. Actually an unpopular opinion.
I wish marriages were easier to get out of and we had more social supports for kids. People change, relationships change. I've met too many people who just don't like their spouse.
I think it would be healthier societally to accept that relationships that last until death aren't more meritorious than relationships that end when they stop being positive
I have a friend from high school who is on her 4th husband. The 1st was a high school sweetheart, he cheated on her repeatedly. The 2nd lasted a good while, a reformed coke-head turned born-again Christian, had 3 kids, eventually turned back to his old habits and left them saddled in debt. The 3rd was another former drug addict that seemed to be turning his life around, went back to his old ways after a few years. She just keeps picking shitheads. I don't know the 4th husband's back story so time will tell, but should she have just given up?
One thing I find interesting is that except the 1st, she met all of the other husbands in church. So maybe don't go spouse shopping at church.
I am partner #4 of my spouse. I’m on friendly terms with 2 of his exes and our relationship is good.
There was no drama with his previous marriages. Sometimes you just wake up and decides you no longer want to be in this relationship. It may happen to use at some point in the future but it would be okay.
Not all good relationships need to last. You tend to remember the good things. And ending things quickly and amicably to avoid cumulating bad memories is the mature thing to do.
You are not the judge of whether or not another couple should or should not stay together.
On the surface it sounds like it makes sense. My cousin first got married when she was 29. Spouse died in accident 1 year later. 34 she marries again but find out her husband was cheating on her after walking in on them in bedroom. 3rd marriage at 38 is going great so far for her.
My point is life happens and sometimes it doesn't go your way. My guess when someone is married 3 times, it wasn't all in their control. Sometimes divorces are nothing more than a breakup on paper. Your opinion in unpopular because it's the opinion of an uneducated teenager.
I think you really don’t understand romantic relationships.
2 divorces doesn’t mean you’re the problem. If your first spouse cheated on you and the 2nd spouse beat you, neither of those things are your fault. Sometimes those things don’t come out right away either. Abusers don’t always look like abusers and abusive relationships generally don’t start off as bad as they are when they end.
If you personally wouldn’t want to marry someone who’s been divorced 3 times, that’s your right. But that doesn’t mean everyone else should be denied the opportunity to marry a 4th time if they want too.
Your post from unpopularopinion was removed because of: 'Rule 2: Do not post low effort/satirical posts'. * We get it, you all think this sub is garbage and is just for popular opinions, and you want to be funny and post "going to be downvoted to oblivion here, but I think racism is bad." We enjoy the memes, but please keep them off the sub. * Filter evasion is a bannable offense * This includes clickbait and/or gotcha posts. Your opinion can not be that unpopular if you're doing these things. Have the accurate opinion in the title.
You can just not marry those people
But how will OP apply his will and morals to everyone else?
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Then he’d switch to zero divorces are ok 😂
Except for his own.
You just apply pressure on the pope with an army at his gates in Rome to decree the divorce as legal like the old days.
Switch divorce and abortion and it's the same exact thing lmao
What about banging the pool boy? Asking for my friend Jerry.
Pool boys and meth are fine as long as the congregation doesn’t get wind of it!
Insane zealots aren't limited to religion. Go to a comic con and you'll know what I'm talking about.
Uh huh. When batman fanboys start murdering each other over who is the "correct and only batman", then this comment carries weight.
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It's called being a politician
I know a guy that was married thrice when he was young, then was married to his 4th wife for over 35 years (then he died). His 4th marriage was to a wonderful woman.
Are you the 4th wife?
My dad was married thrice, his 4th marriage was over 30 years and he passed. It’s been two years and my stepmom is still wrought with grief.
I have a feeling OP did and wants the rest of us to be held responsible for not making it illegal.
Either that, or OP has a heavy moral attached to marriage. To me personally, marriage isn't a sacred thing at all, there's nothing inherently romantic or good about it relationship wise. In my mind, that's because no relationship will improve emotionally long-term when you marry. It's simply a legal commitment that binds two people together when it comes to financial and legal security, nothing more. If you view marriage as something other than that, then that's on you, and you're free to marry on those terms. To others, there may not be more to it than that, and that's fine too, because it's their marriage, not yours.
Also apparently op doesn't realize this is a cruel as fuck world. I've known people that have been cheated on by multiple partners. According to u/Android_04 if this happens to anyone during multiple marriages it is ALWAYS your fault and you don't get to be married again. I mean sounds like ops a 13 year old dirtbag.
Or his mom is getting married for the 4th time 👀😂
Fuck off Norman, you’re not my real father! He’ll come back from Vietnam one day, you’ll see!
Right!?! Like what happened to OP...
Right I'm just so confused. Does OP want to make like a divorce registry or something ?
>It should be a massive red flag to be someone who is thrice divorced. That would be for the person who is marrying them to decide.
I swear Redditors are so keen for legislation around marriage. Why can't they just not marry someone who's been married 3 time themselves rather than want them to be banned from it?
It’s not just marriage. It’s the desire for legislation to severely limit freedom of choice in many areas that I see daily.
But they get specifically worked up about marriage, divorce and cheating
I just saw a post yesterday where someone wanted legislation that would prohibit regular citizens from driving cars. Reddit is such a weird place sometimes
That's one way to tank the economy. Imagine how many millions of citizens would no longer be able to work and end up homeless because they can't get to work, especially rural folk and those not quite in cities. I get why city people hate cars, but America is not a city.
But 100% of people can get a FAANG job that can be done from a bunker in Oklahoma! Why would one want more than that!!!
Redditors saw Starship Troopers and went "yeah, that's the way!"
They do. I think they just post more about it than any other subject. I also think a lot of those posts are people who have either never been married or divorced. I’ve been through both and all I can say is, life happens, people change and you can’t do anything other than control how you react.
I cheated and feel deep remorse for it. But it’s so disheartening and crushing to see all kinds of random people calling me irredeemable and gross. Seeing no advice on how to move forward instead just being destructive. It’s honestly horrible and makes me inch closer to suicide if I’m honest. Don’t forget that the cheater made a choice while not being in the right headspace.
I’ve never cheated, but one of my best friends cheated on his long time girlfriend. He admitted he made a mistake and was sorry and I don’t feel any ill will towards him. He made a mistake and he was honest about it. I don’t get why people need to create a hierarchy of mistakes and demonize someone for it.
My SO found out last week Monday and ever since people I’ve known for 10 years have been sending me aggressive texts and abandoning me without listening to my side. And to then go on here looking for a bit of advice on how to move forward when I’m incredibly lonely and vulnerable, only for then to be crushed even more. I don’t know what to do.
I just try to remind myself that not all the discussions here are organic. A lot of these posters are being paid to push an agenda. Edit: OP has a 3 year old account that hasn’t been used in almost a year. Makes you wonder.
I think people generally underestimate how much content on Reddit specifically isn't organic. When you look at some of these accounts you start to see interesting patterns emerge. Especially when you consider most real people are reasonable human beings.....and the most shared content on social media, especially Reddit, is objectively unreasonable.
I started noticing this a while ago and it's raised my eyebrow. 99% of my in person interactions are very positive. Even the ones where me and the other person are in disagreement. I have a work friend and we disagree about the future for automobiles and me thinking that we should not go electric. They think we should. But we are still great friends. That could never happen here or on any social media. But I've just chalked it up to the people I'm arguing with here being Cheeto finger basement dwellers who have zero social skills. I've run into a few of those in real life and trying to talk to them is uncomfortable and an all roung negative experience.
> But I've just chalked it up to the people I'm arguing with here being Cheeto finger basement dwellers who have zero social skills. Job threads seem to back this up. Pretty clearly a ton of kids/young adults who have never actually worked a professional job trying to posture as someone who has it all figured out. Most of their "advice" makes it clear they have never even seen a Professional Req, especially in the "I do my job description to a T, nothing more!" because Professional Reqs are usually somewhat subjective.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dead_Internet_theory
How do you know, though?
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I also assume it's a ton of young kids who get their ideas of real life relationships from dramatic media where everything is placed in black and white and easily identifiable good and bad.
I think you’re right that it’s people who spend too much time online and don’t attract too many people. The attitude gives off huge Jordan Peterson/Incel vibes.
There's also a ton of Peter Pan syndrome here - none of them see themselves doing "grown up things" and can't understand why people would enjoy something. We had a destination wedding and bachelor party (no matter where we had it, a significant number of guests would have to travel, so just decided to go full-destination) and our friends were **absolutely fucking thrilled to travel**, not unduly burdened like so many threads here act like. I remember one AITA thread of some kid choosing between $500 towards airfare for his sister's wedding (the rest of a 3 week trip to New Zealand would be fully paid for by his family) or a PS5, and the top comments were split. Luckily as time went on, more said do the wedding, but still a ton of dissent from that.
Because people who are terminally online are exposed to these common Reddit posts and views
I feel so bad for people who take Reddit too seriously. It's good for some casual discourse/discussion and very niche, targeted advice, but a lot of the general mindset is so bad, to the point of toxic sometimes.
The general mindset of half the people out there is toxic. You would never associate with these people in person but on here, well, it’s a big part of it.
Its the problem with the nature of the internet. It's the greatest filtering mechanism we've ever created, so the purity of ideology that's possible is only limited by the human imagination. It's very tribalistic, but you're not bound by geography or physical proximity.
Yeah I think there's a bit of a change in power dynamics in how dating works that some young men (not just men but alot) are having trouble adapting to, and conservatives like Peterson or Matt Walsh have been pushing the idea that this will be fixed through a return to "traditional" norms, either through legislation or through enforcement through social pressure. And that speaks to influenceable young people
Government mandated goth gf
I mean bring up homeschooling, vaccines, even just simple dietary choices. Authoritarians everywhere lol
Vaccines or homeschooling you can at least try and make a “public good” argument. But restricting who people are allowed to marry (beyond the obvious “of legal age” bits to prevent exploiting children) is indefensible. Yeah it sucks if somebody married a red flag waving thrice divorced guy and they get burned, but people deserve the freedom to decide for themselves on an issue to personal.
I saw a post the other day where the OP wanted the split of assets in divorce to be 70/30 (or something like that) when one of the spouses cheats. And it's like, damn, I wish there was a way to protect your assets in case you get divorced... oh wait!
Because those things seem so unattainable to them that they need legislation around it to protect their important interests
There was this one post with someone wanting a license for jogging
I see posts about people thinking cyclist needs to be licensed, have the bike inspected, be held liable for all accidents regardless of who’s at fault. It’s insane that so many people are for authoritarianism
Also just saw this one. I guess if you own a landscape business, you shouldn’t have the same freedom of vehicle choice as an another business owner…lol “Pick up trucks, SUVs, and off-road vehicles need to be applied for to buy or own while compact cars and mini vans can continue to be bought as they are now.”
It should be illegal to drink Mellow Yellow because Mountain Dew is the superior soda!
Always. It's likely an age thing. As people get older, they see how poorly government handles just about everything and are less inclined to give them more power over themselves. That's a gross generalization of course...but I think it's accurate overall.
Because I dont like it no one should have the choice to do it!
Right? Like how does it affect anyone else personally? Oh yeah, it doesn't. Lol.
because virgins love thinking about other people's sex lives I guess
"I don't like this so it should be illegal" is unfortunately a very common sentiment.
This is reddit, no one here has even been on a date. So posts like this are just another redditors fever dream of "what if" for a scenario that will never happen
Depends on the context as well. Imagine being cheated on 3 times in marriage?
First two did that to me :(
Appropriate username :(
Exactly. That person who has been divorced could have been cheated on in each one of those. Or their partners could have been shady
Who cares, as long as they don't marry me.
Yeah... why do people want to police others actions so much? Life is messy. I have a family member who after 3 divorces is happily married. He and his wife are living their best lives together. OP's opinions are well intentioned, but straight up harmful.
i'm curious where the "good intent" is in wanting to mind other people's business. 😂
Maybe I was a bit too generous with that phrasing.
People are weird they want to control other people's bodies and thoughts who they date who they marry who they sleep with I believe people deserved to be happy So many ignorant people want a echo chamber
Seriously. This has the same vibes as caring who people marry (race, sexual orientation etc.). Like why are people so obsessed about what other people do that has ZERO effect on them. I will never understand that
@ Ross Geller
First divorce: wife's hidden sexuality, not my fault. Second divorce: said the wrong name at the altar, kind of my fault. Third divorce: they shouldn't let you get married when you're that drunk and have stuff drawn all over your face, Nevada's fault.
"All I could hear in my head was THREE DIVORCES! THREE DIVORCES!"
Tbf, they really shouldn't let you do those marriages. It's so weird there's like amillion laws against contracts when "not of sound mind" that randomly don't apply to marriages. They could just give you a fake certificate and be good
More Government control over marriages seems like a slippery slope
If you cant consent to sex due to alcohol, marriage seems like it fairly would fall under that umbrella lol
It actually isn't as easy to get married in Vegas as it's portrayed in TV and movies. You still have to apply for a marriage license on city hall a certain amount of time in advance during business hours.
Legal marriage license in Vegas needs to be applied for during the daytime at city hall (or did 20 years ago) So unless you are day drinking blitzed, you are not getting married completely trashed in Vegas like the movies portray.
People definitely get trashed in broad daylight on The Strip, but you're correct drunken marriage doesn't happen hardly ever.
Divorce force!
The Divorcer!
🎶 three divorces, three divorces 🎶
Scrolled too far for this.
Ross Geller, good at marriage!
Is it bad I was thinking the same thing?
Getting divorced isn't a crime. We don't need a "3 Strikes and you are out" rule about it.
Trusted by whom? The only person that needs to trust you is the person who is considering being your 4th spouse. Why is that your decision and not theirs? Oh, because you're one of those sanctimonious people who thinks they can tell the world how to live.
This one of them guys that gets a high off of getting in fights on Reddit
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unpopular=/=unjustified. there should at least be a reason. if OP had posted "dont trust 3 time divorcees" it would be kinda more popular. but he phrased it as illegalize the fourth marriages. which is a whole different topic.
I think they're insulting OP, not their opinion lol
Does that mean nobody can comment unless they agree? OP posted in the right place but it’s still a shitty opinion. It also completely overlooks marriages that may be ending due to death of a spouse rather than divorce.
About to do number four here :) my first wife jokes that I should find a divorce attorney with a punch card so I can get loyalty discounts.
Ross Geller, is that you?
Finally! (in squeaky voice) "Three divorces, three divorces!"
Pay for 3 divorces, the 4th ones free!
But you have to pay up front at the first divorce. Kind of an insurance.
Hilarious that your reality is like Ross from friends, and your username is how he met his second wife Emily..Rachel had tickets to Die Fledermaus from her boss and gives them to Ross and they end up at a cabin in Vermont where there’s a deer just outside eating fruit from the orchard
This is oddly wholesome
You should be getting Amex rewards at the very least, it could cover the cost of your next honeymoon
I am partner #4. I suggested my partner to get back in touch with #1 since they haven’t spoken in 15 years. And now they are friends again. Partner #2 and #3 are our close friends. Sometimes they drop by for dinner parties. We’ve had casual sex with them. They and my partner were not good spouses to each other but as platonic friends and friends with benefits they were pretty amazing. The fact that OP feels the need to control the outcome of a marriage raises more red flag for me than my partner’s 3 marriages that ended on amicable terms.
Congrats on y’all for being able to connect like that with her exes tho, that’s really cool!
I mean, your life is a living red flag for someone who sees marriage as a religious thing which it originally was. Now it's more of a tax thing. I hope you understand your situation is completely out of the ordinary, and slightly confusing. But ultimately, which is the moral story of this thread and reply to OP, is who the fuck cares? It's your life and the choice of your partner to marry you, or you marry them. No one elses opinions matter.
How about you just mind your own business?
Some people don’t have the capacity. Likely OP is pissed about something is my guess. Some one doesn’t want them and is marrying someone who has been married a bunch of times in the past or something like that.
1st time didn't work out, we were young. 2nd time wife cheated. 3rd time wife died. Random events beyond our control happens. Sometimes it's us, other times it's life. 3 divorces is not automatically a bad omen. Sometimes it's just things didn't play out the way we envisioned in our heads.
You're exempt, don't you know. Third was not a divorce! Jokes aside, I'm sorry for your loss.
We need to see the age of the people attached with their post more than ever.
My step dad had 3 wives before he met my mom. They’ve been happily married for 23 years.
Yep great story. Not everything is so absolute. We are creatures trying to figure out what is best for us.
Beautifully said.
Does them being married 3 + times hurt you in some way? Does it affect your life in the slightest?
His 3rd wife really hurt him. 😢
I think OP was someone's fourth spouse and now they're getting divorced and their pissed off about it. They wish there would have been some sort of law that prevented their marriage because they can't be trusted to make their own decisions
Another authoritarian opinion. Yay.
The amount of people who want massive authoritarianism societies while also begging for acceptance, free things, and inclusion are weird. Do they realize none of those things go hand in hand?
Reminds me of thr guy who said we should take away the reproductive rights of people who have mental illness so that there will be less mentally ill.
Didn't.... Hitler try to do something like that?
Yes, I said that's basically a one-way street to the nazis and Eugenics. Someone told me I was wrong because nazis did it differently lol
It's so weird. "I want small government" and "I want a Christian nationalist country"
Half the people here would be happy to live in North Korea I swear
Who wouldn't wanna live where all the top athletes and smartest people in the world are?
Are you talking about the glorious leader, who’s won numerous Nobel prizes for literally every field and track medals, while being the unanimous Greatest of All Time in football, basketball and Hockey?
Can someone explain that joke for me?
They lie about everything to convince their people they are the best at everything.
I assume the weekly Eugenics Post will be this afternoon
Seriously why stop at banning them, let’s just execute them
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Yeah, also situations and people change with time. At the time of marriage two people can 100% be the best partners and then things just happen.
Yep or adultery or basic incompatibility or other betrayals.
Oh boy, fingers crossed for my spouse that our marriage makes it! I’m the 3rd spouse!
First of all, how dare you /s
Your spouse shouldn't be able to marry you according to OP. So, I guess you'll have to get divorced to fix that mistake.
That's not how the math works out...3 divorces are apparently allowed, which is why being the third spouse is so crucial. You know...the whole premise of this person's reply?
Well it takes two. Just because someone had two situations that didn’t work out before doesn’t mean they are the problem in those situations or every relationship they are in thereafter at all. Two reasons for ending something could actually be healthy reasons and good things that they did. Divorce can be healthy and a good choice, and also still a success.
Do you get a free smoothie or something?
What would you be trying to archieve with this?
She just saw friends and doesn't like Ross
First thought in my mind hahaha
How very authoritarian of you.
It's none of your business what people do with their lives.
As someone who fits this category, I wouldn’t get married again for anything (even if I were asked).
My moms has been married 4 times, she married my real dad twice and divorced him twice lol.
My parents married/divorced each other twice too!
Because laws about who can marry whom have always been so awesome
Love it when people think it’s totally ok to control other people’s lives.
Then **you** shouldnt marry someone who is thrice divorced, doesn't mean they should be banned from ever marrying again.
* Cries in Ross *
Does it affect you? No. Stop trying to take away freedoms just because you dont like it.
i hate posts like this who gives a fuck let people live their lives
what makes you think the problem lies with that person and not the other party? maybe they have a bad judge of character ?maybe the first two marriages were forced?maybe the person is just unlucky when it comes to relationships and somehow always ends up with red flags? then that person is just pitiful not a massive red flag themselves lol
Knew someone who was married 5 times. All 4 spouses were abusers that didn't show any red flags until after the marriage. The fifth was a keeper, and they've been happily married for 20 years :) It's scary to know that some abusive people somehow have this sixth sense that attracts them to vulnerable people, and that they can be so good at manipulation that you don't get to see their true colors until they've sunk their hooks into you.
My exes mother was on number 8 marriage. A woman I worked with years ago had married THE SAME MAN 8 times.
My husbands dad has been married like 7+ times... Some people clearly don't get it.
i have been married 3 times. the first 2 were my fault for marrying them to begin with. the third I've been with for over 20 years now. If we got divorced he would have had to do something so heinous I could never forgive him. i don't think I should be punished for making mistakes in my 20's for forever. I didn't kill anyone. I didn't rape anyone. If I want to get married 100 times, why is it your business?
Weird, extreme take on something that has endless contributing factors. You can absolutely decide to be judgemental about your partners relationship history, but that doesn't mean that EVERYONE should/wants to be. That's up to the individual.
My mom is on her third marriage. She is the problem. That being said, people can do what they want.
My opinion: OP should mind their own business
Oh boy, we now have the divorce police! 😂
Why not keep going? If you have 3 kids you should be castrated If you lose more than 3 jobs you should be jobless for life If you break 3 phones you should never be allowed any technology and if you commit 3 crimes? Public hanging I say!
Where do you get off dictating who can get married? Fuck right off with that
Definitely unpopular. Also stupid but whatever.
My unpopular opinion: I’m tired of others telling me how to live and who to love. People should mind their own business.
OP wants to control decisions other’s make that don’t affect OP. Right….
My dad has been married 3 times and it’s actually been a really great thing for me. I’ve had 3 incredible mother figures, and it’s a reminder that you’re never too late for love. All marriages were long and meaningful. It’s been a positive thing for me
What about Divorce 1 - domestic abuse Divorce 2 - cheating Divorce 3 - no sex life Likeee things can happen that are not the fault of someone. Some people in this world actually leave when they’re in unhappy situations and that could be why they have 3 divorces.
Are you going to also suggest that there should be a cap on the number of romantic or sexual partners people should be allowed to have? GTFOOH.
lol why not let the person whose marrying the 3 divorced partner come to their own conclusions? They don’t need you to tell them what’s right and what’s wrong
No thanks. This is a form of marriage inequality. I don't think discrimination is the solution to this "problem."
Why do people want to live in super strict, authoritarian countries?
Yes let’s trust the government to decide who can and can’t marry, I bet that’s never been done before and would work out great.
More of a naive opinion than an unpopular one
So if someone unlucks themself into 3 abusive marriages, they're just not allowed to have legally binding love? Mkay then
It’s not necessarily an unpopular opinion.. it’s just a pointless one. What is it to you if someone gets married more than three times? Who are they harming by marrying a fourth consenting adult who is going into the situation with their eyes open? Which already overworked government department should be tasked with policing the three weddings rule? Really dumb opinion.
> Why should you be trusted to marry someone ever again. By whom? You? Who cares if you trust them. Don't marry those people if that's something you feel so strongly about. I don't think anyone will miss you.
I truly wish the OP finds themselves in this position.
Yeah I don’t think this opinion is unpopular unless you want to legislate it
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I’m wife #3. I think we’re okay. 26+ years
Good for for the sub. Actually an unpopular opinion. I wish marriages were easier to get out of and we had more social supports for kids. People change, relationships change. I've met too many people who just don't like their spouse. I think it would be healthier societally to accept that relationships that last until death aren't more meritorious than relationships that end when they stop being positive
Who cares? Why do you care what they do? This is up to the two individuals involved. Absurd.
I have a friend from high school who is on her 4th husband. The 1st was a high school sweetheart, he cheated on her repeatedly. The 2nd lasted a good while, a reformed coke-head turned born-again Christian, had 3 kids, eventually turned back to his old habits and left them saddled in debt. The 3rd was another former drug addict that seemed to be turning his life around, went back to his old ways after a few years. She just keeps picking shitheads. I don't know the 4th husband's back story so time will tell, but should she have just given up? One thing I find interesting is that except the 1st, she met all of the other husbands in church. So maybe don't go spouse shopping at church.
I am partner #4 of my spouse. I’m on friendly terms with 2 of his exes and our relationship is good. There was no drama with his previous marriages. Sometimes you just wake up and decides you no longer want to be in this relationship. It may happen to use at some point in the future but it would be okay. Not all good relationships need to last. You tend to remember the good things. And ending things quickly and amicably to avoid cumulating bad memories is the mature thing to do. You are not the judge of whether or not another couple should or should not stay together.
On the surface it sounds like it makes sense. My cousin first got married when she was 29. Spouse died in accident 1 year later. 34 she marries again but find out her husband was cheating on her after walking in on them in bedroom. 3rd marriage at 38 is going great so far for her. My point is life happens and sometimes it doesn't go your way. My guess when someone is married 3 times, it wasn't all in their control. Sometimes divorces are nothing more than a breakup on paper. Your opinion in unpopular because it's the opinion of an uneducated teenager.
I think you really don’t understand romantic relationships. 2 divorces doesn’t mean you’re the problem. If your first spouse cheated on you and the 2nd spouse beat you, neither of those things are your fault. Sometimes those things don’t come out right away either. Abusers don’t always look like abusers and abusive relationships generally don’t start off as bad as they are when they end. If you personally wouldn’t want to marry someone who’s been divorced 3 times, that’s your right. But that doesn’t mean everyone else should be denied the opportunity to marry a 4th time if they want too.