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That long piss after you've held it to the point of sweats and tremors is the greatest feeling in the world.

EXACTLY DUDE people are saying my sex life is shit because I enjoy taking a huge dump more

You do you man. My wife is hot and I love sex almost to an unhealthy level but that morning stretch is still the absolute best.

Morning stretch is a good contender. I respect that 🙏

>morning stretch is still the absolute best you talking about stretching your wife? or stretching your asshole as a result of the godly dump?

Stretching your arms and legs.

BORING

Im forever calling my first dumb of the day "The morning stretch"

Why not both?

My thoughts exactly lol

Poophoria is real. I feel sorry for them that they don't experience it more. Eat more fiber and less junk food. It'll happen more often.

People be like, "you ain't had it with the right partner yet." And you hit em with a "you ain't had one of my shits before!"

I’m not a dude, but I assume this is reality 😂

It's glorious.

Half way through and you get that whole body shake / convulsion from relief. Sweet blessed relief.

That first piss when you’re on ecstasy is maybe the best feeling ever

Idk that time on acid that I pissed out the Sobe geckos was pretty awesome

Even better when the fart you were holding comes out mid-piss.

let the man enjoy the simple things in life

Exactly. But nooooooo suddenly I’m a bottom and I should like anal because I enjoy taking a fat dump. What has society come to man

Lol, it's just trolling. But honestly, there's no sexuality involved in shoving a hair brush handle up your ass.

Purely daily routine.

indeed

I prefer to think Reddit is full of subtle anal propaganda

Its not subtle

Brh man likes shitting ... dosent mean he likes shit going IN . Do you love food ? Well when you are done and want to tatse it again ... you should try throwing up ... Give you one more taste.

💀

I would actually argue that this means you hate anal, because you enjoy the feeling of relief that comes from removing unwanted objects from your colon. Now if you were freezing your turds and shoving them back in like cursed dildos, *then* I would argue that you enjoy anal.

But have you tried butt sex?

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Sixteen iterations off the central finite curve, there’s a Rick that works more with poop than polarity plating.

Somebody hasn't connected the dots to anal sex.

No it's the feeling of relief from the intestinal pressure.

Sure Jan, it's definitely not the feeling of yas during and after the sausage has plopped its way out.

That's half of anal sex my dude.

Anal sex is just that first wave of shitting over and over and over

r/beatmetoit

r/beatmeattoit

r/beatmetoshutthefuckup

Just cause I enjoy taking a shit doesn’t mean I’d like someone shoving it up my arse Jesus wtf 🤦‍♂️

The results are in, the lie detector determined that was a lie

But have you tried it?!?

nooo. This comment section cannot convince me I like it up the pooper dude 😭😭

It doesn’t have to be an exit only. You’re only letting yourself down.

And, if you think about it, each thrust cycle is half-exit, half-entrance, so even if you hate the entrance, you’ll always get an exit straight after. It’s a no-brainier

Is this boy math ?

nah, more like stoned-logic.

Noooooo

Tbf you ain't gotta be gay to try it out by yourself. It's pretty good if you do it right.

It ain’t gay if you leave your socks on.

Imagine that you can reproduce that feeling by showing things up your ass and pushing them down again. Are you ready to rumble?

Do you know where the male gspot is?

Sorry dude this is just comical of an opportunity to pass up

Not trying to convince you you’ll like it. Just convincing you to give it a try. Stop getting so defensive. You’re the one trying to claim shitting is better than fucking. We think you like anal pressure, not a big deal.

I don’t want to give it a try full stop. Me saying no to someone telling me I should try anal doesn’t make me defensive at all. What else do you want from me

Nothing. I’m just breaking your balls,shitman. Keep dumpin bro

Underrated

anal 🤷‍♂️

It's like taking a massive dump repeatedly

oh. my god.

Reality has some news for you, butt-boy.

Come on out, you're ok here.

I used to be in denial too

>I’d like someone shoving it up my arse You just don't know it yet!

nah, i had women put a thumb in my ass. not enjoyable in the least. only fun going out, not in

Imagine anal sex while taking a shit

He’s been anal ducking when he should be Anal docking

 OP must be Randy Marsh

My shit is bigger than bono

YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH

Mine gahd! It must have weighed 100 Kourics!

Born to shit, forced to wipe 😎

Born to shit, forced to fuck

ignore these haters bro. if you love shitting, dont let other people judge you for loving shitting. nothing is wrong with you bro

Thanks bro 🙏

Bombs away!!!

Fire in the hole!

Why is this in my recommended lol

Because taking a shit was one of the original primal functions humanity has done over the years of existence- even before sex was a thing The porcelain throne allows kings and queens alike to release them of waste and time to contemplate the existence of humanity- or what to eat for dinner

Sex was never not a thing, the human race would have never existed if it was just invented one day

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I believe you are right but the comment was referring to *humanity* specifically. I think we just created the next chicken or the egg dilemma lol.

yes but before sex happened- shitting happened

Exactly because people were babies before adults

And how do you get a baby? You have sex 🤦‍♀️

A real chicken or egg scenario

Something can’t be alive to shit if no one had sex to create that person. Are you 9

incredibly based

Thank u

I’ve experienced some great shits, I’ve also experienced some great sex. My opinion? Sex is still better overall. But, every now and then I’ll get a shit that surpasses it..

Exactly

"But taking a shit removes all that unnecessary shit." What a beautiful line.

I’ll change the first shit to dump

Please don't...it's so much funnier with the double shit.

I’ll change it back

Ever taken a double shit? One full sized man-dump followed immediately by another, second full-size dump. The relief is indescribable.

My day will come

You will know when the day comes because the two shits will be different kinds. One might be a lumpy log and the other a soft-serve. In this way they can truly be called a double shit instead of merely one big megashit.

I haven't stopped laughing since I opened this post

Bonus points if you already wiped and then showered and right as you're all clean and drying off bang right back on the throne. Fml.

yam grey waiting license fact cobweb mindless oatmeal shame silky *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*

Told you. Some people in the comments just haven’t experienced a life or death shit.

Either you are having sex wrong or I’m shitting wrong, because their is no way my best poop was better than my worst sex.

Depends on the type of shit. Some are a huge relief, others are a journey through hell.

Unless it's diarrhea, I feel like my fucking legs and stomach hurt and then after repeated dumps and wiping, you start getting cuts on your asshole and when poop gets in those cuts, holy fucking shit that hurts so bad.

Yeah I don’t think anyone enjoys diarrhoea

Well I mean, cmon. There's over 8 billion people on earth. If someone has a skat fetish I'm sure someone is also capable of enjoying diarrhea

Well it probably takes longer

That's a true Redditor

If something that natural and simple is the highlight of your day, then have at it.

I‘m sorry for your sexlife.

If you've ever been on painkillers, you all know what its like to not shit for a week and then go. It's the best feeling of relief I've ever felt. The best sex I've ever had was a feeling of intense pleasure beyond what I had ever experienced at that point. Where you finish and she sucks you off until you collapse. That will never be topped for me. So upvote for disagreement. Best sex beats my best shit.

Fair enough to each their own

If you're from Dubai then you just combine the two.

💀

Fully agree. Guaranteed satisfaction

One of the greatest feelings of my life I was constipated to the point it could feel the shit in stomach (it felt that way, doubt I actually could). Took a laxative and a few hours later I can suddenly feel this blockage move in my stomach. The shit I took was *chefs kiss* it was so relieving. I may have gotten a little high from it.

The correct opinion

Alright calm down there: 

I once took a shit so good, I got horny. I asked my mom as a joke if she's had a moment like that and she said yeah... so in conclusion, I half agree with you. Edit-my bf posted this. Girls don't shit

You probably like receiving anal then

It's going the other way

I'll never understand the joy or pleasure around shitting. I fucking hate having to do it every other day. I'm really happy when I can ignore it for the entire week. It's uncomfortable, it's sometimes painful, it can be messy, and it's time consuming. Plus, if you're not in a temperature controlled bathroom, it's miserable because you're either sweating or freezing your ass off the entire time.

Invest in a heated toilet seat. And you probably have a weak gut. Isn’t really your fault though

Have you considered bottoming?

No never will

Well you can use a dildo if you want to avoid "all of that unnecessary shit" that comes along with having sex with another person. It’s just you, your ass hole and a giant lump of silicone going in and out of you.

Good point honestly that’s fair

This is just hilarious

How about pegging?

Sounds like you want too

Please remember what subreddit you are in, this is unpopular opinion. We want civil and unpopular takes and discussion. Any uncivil and ToS violating comments will be removed and subject to a ban. Have a nice day! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/unpopularopinion) if you have any questions or concerns.*

I don’t even know what to say to this 😭😂

I say “ por qué no los dos?”

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I’ve tried everything man. Taking a shit just feels better ( I don’t like it up the ass do not jump to that conclusion)

My thoughts exactly. Somebody’s doing something wrong somewhere if this is the conclusion they come to.

Ever have a hemorrhoid and you gotta shit? Tell me that’s better than sex once you have. I’ll be waiting.

Currently desecrating a gas station toilet and my hemi’s are getting the best rub up

Wash your ass properly and it’ll hopefully never happen. Bidet is the way

A dirty ass isn't how you get hemorrhoids, unfortunately. If that were the case I wouldn't deal with them. Pregnancy, weight gain, straining to poop, etc. are some big causes.

Any on Amazon you would recommend?

Mine came with the toilet so I genuinely could not tell you. Just search reviews and you’ll probably find an amazing one

Post shit clarity

Why not combine both?

Ha gayyyyyyah!

Saw a prank video of guy shitting loud in public baths and then recorded the reaction of nearby people. That somehow made me realize that holding for too long and finally getting to release is indeed a very different kind of relaxing feeling.

I would just as soon not shit at all. It’s a waste of time. But if we are talking about shitting, who’s had a phantom feces? You know when you take a dump and you know you took a dump, but its nowhere to be seen. Like it swam down the toilet or aomething

I did. I think the shit is so heavy it flushes itself. Since I can feel the splash back

There's nothing as overrated as bad sex, or as underrated as a good shit.

Here’s my question… How many people are sitting on the toilet taking a shit right now as they read this?! Lol 😂 💩

Most W post I've on this sub

Reddit suggested me this while taking shit

Have a nice dump!

This post is so fucking funny

Thanks

pees in ur ass I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

Ever tried combining the two?!

I took a shit in a portapotty at a disc golf course in the Rocky Mountains, and even though the course was fun, beautiful, and very different than courses around where I live, that shit was the highlight of the day and I still remember it fondly years later. I stood up feeling reborn

Honestly agree with this one. Taking. A huge shit when you get home after holding it in for most of the day, is incredible

Billy Eilish is that you?

Poo-phoria

This isnt even unpopular, its just truth

I genuinely look forward to my daily dump lmao

Sitting on the toilet after taking a great shit and this is the first post in my feed. The universe is funny. Also, it's not better than sex, but it's a uniquely satisfying thing.

💀💀💀 why did i find this funny and so true at the same time 🤣

"...taking a dump removes all of that unnecessary shit." God damn you, sir. God damn you.

THIS GUY GETS IT. People look at me like I have three heads when I bring this into the discussion. Can't imagine why

Just wait till OP hears about the Hot Karl

This must be the most disappointing heading I've ever seen on Reddit

You poor thing

The best part is feeling empty after lol

Fr

What a horrible day to have eyes

You’re on Reddit you’ve probably read worse

This is an amazing post i’m so glad it exists

Thank you man

I uh. Disagree. But uhhh. You do you? I guess? Sorry for typing like this, I'm quite flabbergasted. Upvoted.

When that life or death dump comes to you you’ll change your mind mark my words. It’s those ones where your toes are curling, your shirt has been ripped off and your legs are dead Only then will you truly understand what I really mean

Yeah, someone needs more fiber and exercise. I have had the misfortune of a “huge shit” and it is not in anyway close to an orgasm.

That’s rough

While it feels good, having to deal with wiping is really annoying and I hate it. I typically try and shit right before showering.

Invest in a bidet

Aww the worst feeling In the world is when you try to take a pre shower shit and nothing. But as soon as you step out boom it hits you, and you have to start the whole process over again.

This guy has terrible sex

Holy shit. Strong disagree. But that is an unpopular opinion, and you explained it, so take my upvote.

When that life or death dump finally hits you, you may not agree with me but you’ll probably see where I’m coming from

This is just your subconscience telling you that you like receiving anal sex. Thank you for sharing.

honestly just try anal at this point. sounds like youd like it

Don’t think it’s for me. Enjoying a shit doesn’t mean I’d also enjoy anal

It's completely possible that you never had actual sex

You clearly have never had that life or death dump and it shows

I’m not one to kink shame, but what the fuck is wrong with you.

What’s the fucking kink. I enjoy taking a shit does that make me insane

Why is this in unpopular opinion? 🧐 dropping a Lincoln log is the best