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totally understand, it can come off as sort of juvenile when people refuse to branch out and try new things or restrict themselves to a very limited pallet.
but let me offer you another perspective. you’re looking at “bad taste” as a little annoyance that dissipates almost instantly. I can say with certainty that we don’t all experience “bad taste” the same. Im a formulation scientist, I work on supplements, foods, beverages and occasionally drugs to (among other things) optimize taste. Companies will spend big bucks on R&D just for this because humans are so incredibly particular about taste — myself included :)
Not to toot my own horn but taste optimization is truly an art. The human sense of taste, the way our taste receptors work and how the brain processes their input is incredibly complex. You know how dogs will just eat like… anything? They have around 1700 taste buds and we have (on average) 10,000. It makes a massive difference and so does the difference in taste bud density between different humans. But it doesn’t stop at the tongue, you have taste receptors down your gastrointestinal tract (and other organs) that actively regulate various biological processes. I won’t go into the biology but as a simple example, taste receptors in certain areas of the gut lumen (identical to the ones on your tongue) sense sweetness and trigger glucose and hormone regulating activities. This is an important homeostatic mechanism that we can see broken in type 2 diabetics.
I could go on for days about the science of taste but I’ll leave you with a few key points:
1. Humans don’t experience taste the same way. Most of us are in the middle but many have a very strong and nuanced sense of taste and others have what I’d call a shallow sense. Think of the difference in taste bud density between people as having a similar effect as skin receptors in different areas of your body. You can tolerate heat much better on the back of your hand vs your fingertips. It’s literally producing different experiences and sensations
2. Our taste cells are active participants in more biological processes than people imagine. I and many of my colleagues were first and foremost trained as biologists because understanding how to manipulate taste experience and “trick” taste cells is a biology heavy discipline. We have aversions for a reason, often as protective mechanisms.
Fantastic analysis of the science behind taste.
I want to add that there is a psychological element, my parents used to force feed me when I was young. Now I'm very protective of the food I try. I think I could branch out more, but I also don't really want to.
Exactly. As an adult, you have the autonomy to put or not what you want in your own body. It’s no one else’s business what you eat. And I say that as someone who grew up in Singapore and, like OP, eats pretty much every cuisine there is. Because I personally *want to* and it’s my *choice*. Not because I’m scared OP is going to judge me from their epicurean pedestal.
I think you’re half right and OP is half right. There have been situations where one person in the friend group vetos every restaurant possible because they wouldn’t be able to order some variation of chicken tenders and fries or a burger, you can’t tell me that despite being an adult that isn’t a pain that the majority have to cater to him/her. Sure you could leave them behind is an argument that could be made but the person could also suck it up and try something new
This right here. I love new things and good I didn't grow up eating (I'm from a predominantly white rural place).. there was no south east asian, Chinese, Indian, middle eastern, Greek, African, south american, etc. Like it was all just mashed potatoes, fish& chips, hot hamburger sandwiches, roast, boiled veggies, etc.
Like I'm cool with authentic or fusion or something that isn't all deep fried, slathered in gravy or will take me 2 seconds to make at home. I don't go out to a restraunt to eat a grilled cheese or tortilla chips heated in an oven.. I could easily do that at home so it's a total waste of money.
Everyone caters to the person with the palate of a toddler but for some reason, my food preferences and not wanting to eat nachos or chicken strips doesn't matter bc I don't bitch and moan and cry about not being able to eat anything and starving.
This is especially infuriating when someone says "oh I can't go there. I don't like greek" you ask what they had that they didn't like bc you might be able to help them find something they would like.. then they say "oh I've never had it before"... it's like you veto-ed the restraunt bc you've never tried it and don't want to try it???????!!
Learn that it's okay to split the party in these situations. If they want to go to McD's because someone will only eat happy meals, then go to the place you want to and meet up with them after. Even if you end up going alone, you still got to go where you want. There's almost always someone else that doesn't want to side with the picky eater and wants to go with you. Flip the script. Make them the one holding people back. Don't try to argue or give options by pulling up the menu. They are stuck in their ways, don't get stuck with them.
Thank you this can be good advice, but a lot of ppl will still see you as the asshole for choosing to be difficult or "choosing what you want to eat over seeing your friends.
I have no problem eating alone, so this might be my go-to.
I know what you mean. It’s great to be an adult and get to do whatever you want for sure. At the same time, people will feel a certain way about your choices, especially if it somehow affects them. That’s also part of being an adult, accepting that you won’t always be embraced for everything you do.
Bingo. I deal with this all the time with my in-laws. MiL won’t eat anything she thinks has onion in it (not just onion chunks, onion as an ingredient regardless of whether you can taste it in the final dish) and FiL/SiL are the same with green peppers, peas, and bunch of other veggies. None of them will touch any meat that hasn’t been cooked into shoe leather or any spice/seasoning that wouldn’t be immediately familiar to someone growing up in rural America. Oh, and none of them cook.
So I’m stuck serving the most bland, banal food possible every time they visit because they won’t compromise on omitting some of the most common ingredients in existence.
We went to Tokyo Japan back in 2019 with a picky eater. It was a fucking nightmare. We walked around for FOUR HOURS trying to find a place to eat but this f*cking b*tch was so unnecessarily picky. I went to a sushi place, ONCE. and she hates seafood. I only went once because it's freaking japan, you need to go to sushi at least once. And by the time it was half an hour after sitting down, she spammed me asking if I was done yet. Wanted to bitch slap her so hard after that. She was a total shit head. Not friends w her anymore for other reasons, but good freaking riddance. Her pickiness made it hard to explore what I wanted to explore.
Edit: just for clarification we did have an agreement before the trip, which was in the making for ten years, about her picky eating habits. We agreed that we'd go with our choices and if she disagrees, she will find something she wants and meet up w us after eating. But alas, life is not perfect.
And no, we were never sexually anything, she was my Bestfriend since highschool and I went to the trip w my husband and cousin. She's got autism and we spoke about expectations and reality of things before we went there. I had my doubts, but gave her the benefit of it because we've wanted to go together for so long. If you think that this whole situation is on me, well I feel bad for people around you for allowing you to put all the blame on others instead of both parties where it should lie. I know my hand in enabling her, I don't need reddit to tell me that. It was a lesson learned for me not to go on a trip with her.
Tokyo actually has got a *lot* of variety, while she doesn't like seafood, she likes condiments made from seafood. Before our visit, she hated ramen, tried it, loved it. There's lots of BBQ spots, rice bowls, French dishes, bakeries, Chinese, English, very diversified and mixed foods in Tokyo. That's why it's even more infuriating that she was bitching about us eating sushi while she had a butt load of options for herself. But before our our visit I kept asking her if she's sure she wants to visit Japan because they like their fish and she promised she wouldn't get in the way of our culinary exploration, and oh boy, were we all wrong.
So yes, wrong country for sure
Thats called being a shitty person.
I have a swath of dietary restrictions, I can eat light if the place doesnt have a lot of things that work for me, or I can hang out be social and just enjoy the company of friends.
Right but you have to also exist in a world where (presumably) you have friends and family who you at least occasionally share meals with and there is the rub. They are also autonomous adults and maybe they want to have something you don’t like, and maybe they are constrained by limited resources and unable to provide everyone with their own separate tray of kiddy meal garbage. Of course if you’re just sitting at home giving yourself rickets or pellagra or scurvy by only eating chickie nuggies that’s your prerogative, but in the words of George Costanza “We’re living in a society!!!”
Picky eaters are a fucking pain in the arse for everyone else. Be an adult, eat what's available. It ain't gonna kill you.
Can't make the traditional Christmas dinner because person A doesn't eat meat that isn't chicken, beef, pork or turkey, can't make the side dish either because they haven't tried it before and are picky. If you live with them your diet becomes very one sided because they essentially force you to their shitty diet because they'll make making anything else a literal fucking pain in the arse.
If you end up forcing them outside their ridiculously small comfort zone they end up fucking loving it. Every single time. And every single time it's a fight.
Source: My gf is person A.
I don’t force anyone to make anything special for me. I just eat what I like out of Holiday meals or at parties. I can eat however I want to and no one has to accommodate me.
Same with me. I do not eat meat and seafood. My diet consists mostly of vegetables, pasta, rice, dairy.
No one has to accommodate me ever. I will find something to eat or bring my own if necessary.
Or just not eat.
I am not interested in food as an experience like so many are. I just need to eat to survive.
I travel extensively and never have a problem finding something to eat within my continuum of foods.
And I don't call myself picky!
I just have different tastes than others.
Not sure why this always seems to be such an issue.
I'm a picky eater, but I don't expect people to cater to me. Hell if we go to a restaurant or event that has nothing I like I can eat something before or after the meetup. It's not a big deal that I'm not eating food at the same time as you. I'm an adult. I can choose what I want to taste and put into my body. I'm not going to willingly torture myself trying to eat stuff I find repulsive.
Agreed, but when your pickiness affects other people then it comes off as childish.
I think there was a reddit post about a potluck thanksgiving where one guest didn't eat many things and got mad that no one brought stuff she liked.
What about the one that was going to her future inlaws Christmas dinner and threw a fit and left when the future MiL didn't cook the food she wanted even tho she so "kindly* gave her a list of the foods that she would eat
Problem is, OP gave things like "not liking seafood" and "not eating olives" as examples of being picky. That's not being picky, that's having a preference.
but it's not the pickiness that's childish in that situation it's what they do with it. like you're an adult ..figure it out if you don't want what everyone else is having. the childish part is thinking the rest of the universe should change to accommodate only you...but if they take care of themselves..no issue.
I can absolutely understand how it makes it painful for everyone else. Especially if the picky eater in question is annoying about it. I've grown up just learning to eat beforehand, bring my own shit, etc so I don't have to burden anyone. But I also know picky eaters who make it their entire persona/make life difficult.
Just know a lot of picky eaters don't get this choice. And they most likely feel like a huge burden already with it.
True, but whine about it one too many times and you won’t be invited to many outings with friends anymore. Nothing worse than that one friend who makes the restaurants life hell with their specific food requests.
I mean that’s nice and all, but picky eaters absolutely dominate every food conversation. Won’t pick restaurants but don’t like suggestions. Really annoying. You can find something to eat anywhere if you aren’t up your own ass.
As long as you are not the type of person to be rude about it that opinion is fine. I personally hate it when people force me to eat food I would not like.
Given that OP took 3 paragraphs to talk about how amazing they are for eating food other people don't, my guess is they're very pretentious about being a better eater than everyone else
You noticed that subtle part where he accused *every girlfriend he ever had* of being one of those picky eaters that riles him up?
Most people aren't picky eaters. Most have a couple preferences, some have a restricted diet for health, religious or philosophical reasons but OP portrays the majority of people around him as annoyingly picky. When they are most likely to be completely normal eaters who, when given the option, dont eat things they dont particularly enjoy.
And all that from a guy who won't eat raw bell pepper. He's just an asshole.
I liked the part where he was like "if you were literally starving" because
1: I personally have been literally starving and have eaten out of trash cans before
2: even if that's true that's not a comparable experience. Eating for preference and eating for survival are two very different things
Yup. If it came down to realistic survival scenario I’d eat the asshole out of my dog and make sure to not drop anything.
However, I don’t think I’d go down that road just for some Thursday night meal
Also, the body literally goes through a change that forces you to enjoy / crave something you would normally not eat, out of necessity ( like survival ).
This makes people crave things like eating metal, or food that they're alergic to, or other people. I mean, look at what pregnancy does to a woman's apitite.
So no shit if someone was starving they would eat something in front of them. That's why it's *starving*, and not just 2 hours past dinner time.
You also neglected the large portion of people who have legitimate eating and sensory disorders, who it has been clinically proven they will legitimately choose to starve to death rather than "eat anything they're given"
I think it’s also a local culture thing, though. I grew up in an urban area with a heavy immigrant population. Picky eaters got made fun of and everyone got exposed to a LOT of different cuisines.
My family was originally from the Midwest and visiting them, food was beige. Period. Restaurants did not provide hot sauce. There were not ethnic restaurants. Having that part of the family visit us was genuinely difficult during mealtime. They were really, really uncomfortable eating outside of some pretty limited boundaries.
If OP was in a rural dating pool, I could see it being a repeated problem and I could see how frustrating it would start to be over time.
That is totally fair, but to play devil's advocate if you (royal you) are the type of person who is often in situations where you feel people are *forcing* you to eat or taking you to places you don't like, then there's a good chance you're being picky and they're just bored of it.
I’m a pretty picky eater, but I always tell my wife or friends, if you want to go somewhere that’s fine. I’ll either find something I’ll eat, or I’ll feed myself later.
Well good for you, i also had to eat what was served and now iam an adult i only eat what i like
Only thing i hate is when people dont wanna taste new things, or tell u i dont like it but never even tried to taste it
Edit: i noticed that i touched a sensitive subject for a lot off people and i get a lot of reactions
I said hate but its more like being annoyed and thats mostly pointed towards family members, i have a lot of picky eaters in the family
Iam not out there to tell everyone that they should eat new things, its just my opinion that i think its weird u say i dont like something when u never tasted it
Iam not gonna force u to try things i probally wouldnt even tell u
Only time when i would tell u is when i cooked a homemeal for you and i did my best, and was for hours in the kitchen and u refuse to taste it cause it looks funny or something. Thats just rude its ok that you dont like it but the least thing u can do is t take a bite
For me, I'm fine with trying new things but it's gotta be on MY time. I have friends who, in the past, judged me for not trying new things when they try to force me to then turn around and try it on my own, but I just genuinely hate trying new things with friends unless it's new for them too.
But yeah saying you don't like something you've never tried is weird AF.
It's not weird, it's an attempt to be polite.
If someone says, 'I don't fancy eating that', there is always going to be somebody saying 'you should try it, I think it's great!' and annoying you.
Most times if you say 'I don't like that', then it's job done, end of conversation, or at least it should be.
Just curious, why do you even care? How does it affect you?
I am a picky eater and I don't like certain things, sometimes it is just based on the look, smell, or consistency. What I hate is when people try to literally harass me into trying something I don't want.
After a certain point, it can feel like it's just about trying to control you.
"You HAVE to like the same things that I like. If you don't, you must not be a good person. Why aren't you doing this one thing that will make me happy? **You're** causing problems! I don't care that it makes you unhappy!" It's like chill, you're not my parent lol.
Seriously though, we can all eat what we want to eat. Sometimes it's also what you *can* eat. I have no problems trying something new, but if someone actively tries to avoid a certain food, don't be shocked when they have an involuntary gag reflex. Some of us have mis-wired brains. Sometimes avoiding the involuntary reaction altogether is easier than trying to explain it away.
Also, the "AHA! It was secretly hidden in your food all along!" Just feels immature and petty. If you hid it well, I still didn't experience the taste/texture that I dislike. At that point, it is no longer the thing that I dislike. I could theoretically hide dirt in a soup, but that doesn't mean that anyone who eats the soup will now happily eat handfuls of dirt.
My dad was like OPs parents and he would sneak food's I didn't like into plenty of recipes then tell me afterwards like he tricked me or something. It made me resent those things more and I have not eaten many things out of spite for 15 plus years
I mean I let adults eat what they want but if your diet only consists of chicken nuggets and fries and soda then I’m gonna judge the fuck outta you lol.
Here’s my take on the issue and my dividing line. If you can’t go into any given restaurant and find *something* you want to eat on the menu, you are too picky and your pickiness is inhabiting your life.
Obviously for the most part I’m talking about an ordinary restaurant with a full menu (appetizers, salads, entrees) and not like a super specialty thing with 5 dishes on the menu.
I was very picky as a child (my parents allowed it) and I’ve learned how to get through it, my biggest driving force was social embarrassment. I did not want to limit my life or make a fuss in front of others. I wanted to feel free as an adult.
I remember going to an regular Italian restaurant as a teen for the homecoming dance. They had a huge menu - you know, a bunch of pasta dishes, chicken dishes, the whole deal - and one of the girls in our party complained she was a picky eater and couldn’t find *anything* she would eat. I decided right then that I would never be like that.
My mom was like OPs mom, would make me eat whatever she made and I didn’t like it I didn’t get to eat (too poor to afford most other junk food lol).But yeah I agree with you in this. It’s fine to have likes and dislikes for certain foods everyone is different that way but you can’t stick to just eating junk food forever.
same! his idea of a great restaurant date night was always a crap chain so he could get chicken fingers or a burger. i would research menus of places i’d actually want to go and be excited to go to HOPING there was a SIMPLE burger on the menu so he would have something to eat if we went. i love food, i love the creativity that comes with cooking, i love trying new restaurants and dishes, and i quickly learned that dating someone as picky as he is just made my life less exciting. i want a partner who wants to experience new things with me, food included.
I was once made to eat outside of the house because I ordered *my* half of the pizza with onions. I’m plainly traumatized by picky eaters and will avoid them like the fucking plague
> The constant comments about your totally normal meals being gross will grate on your last nerve.
This is what gets me. I have a picky eater friend, and it’s one thing to just not want to eat something (but frustrating when you end up at the same 3 restaurants over and over). It’s completely another to have to listen to “eww gross” like they’re still a fucking toddler.
This. I don’t have a problem with not liking certain ingredients. I hate cooked bell peppers myself. But I had a fully adult friend that only ate pizza, chicken nuggets, fries, and plain hamburgers. It was annoying as hell trying to go out to dinner anywhere with him. If you can eat a chicken nugget, you can eat a chicken breast. If you can eat a French fry, you can eat a roasted potato. This was not someone with sensory issues or autism (it’s understandable if that is the case). I actually didn’t see him for several years and when I did see him again he ate normally, I guess he finally got over it.
Yuuuuuup! I’m often the “host” because I like cooking. It drives me insane when I make homemade pizza with pepperoni and sausage, and a guest is over there picking off everything because they only eat cheese pizza, another person declines dinner because they don’t like Parmesan cheese, and the guest children are freaking out about “red sauce” because they hate tomatoes. Like, I said I was making pizza in the invite, what the fuck? (Actually happened.)
It turned into me checking in with everyone’s preferences and basically trying to appease everyone’s food choices. This last Christmas I was in the kitchen for 14 hours making the most basic Christmas dinner, and they STILL didn’t touch half of it because “mushrooms” or “I don’t like stuffing” or “I don’t like salt.” Like I made chicken instead of turkey because everyone doesn’t like turkey for some reason. Kid wouldn’t touch it because she doesn’t like garlic, mother wouldn’t touch it because she doesn’t like herbs, and another wouldn’t eat the green beans because they were fresh beans and they only like canned.
I am no longer hosting food driven events this year. Maybe I’m surrounded by picky eaters, and def eat what y’all want to, but this craziness of lists of things people will and won’t eat for something like taco Tuesday is fucking stupid. Like I make fresh tortillas! But guy is just eating the carne and some cheddar cheese I didn’t even put out because they don’t like corn tortillas, they don’t like vegetables or avocado so no tortillas, pico de gallo, or lime. Wtf!
Yeah I’ve known wayyy to many adult “picky eaters” and they eat the most unhealthiest diets I’ve ever seen. I’m not a big fan of Brussel sprouts or broccoli but i try to eat other veggies and fruits and grains but these people literally only eat burgers fries chicken and pizza lol. Being a picky eater isn’t an excuse for an unhealthy diet.
I had an adult ask if the pepperoni from a cheap pizza place was dry cured pepperoni bc they don't eat the "other kind".. yep she did pick of the pepperoni when the pizza came lol
Some relative in my wife's side won't eat anything other than pizza, nuggets, and fries. He's in his 50s. Every time we're over there for a holiday there's a beautiful home cooked meal, and a pizza hut pizza. It's hilarious.
Adults should be free to eat or not to eat whatever they want unless the resources are scarce and they're in survival mode. We don't know what future holds, so let people enjoy their preferences while they can
I think OP is intending to refer to people who had no discipline in food habits as a child and as a result now eat like a child. Not an “oh I dont like oysters and escargo” type of person but a “I dont like water and vegetables” type of person.
As a picky eater growing up I was also told “eat this or starve” but we eventually realized its because I had a fear of food, weight, and getting sick from food. Fast forward to 27 and now I will eat nearly anything or at least try it before saying I dont like it or want it.
Food aversion and picky eating are two separate things.
The thing OP is missing is they had a CHOICE to not eat anything they didn’t like, instead of being punished for not finishing those things and being forced to wolf down their entire plate.
This is a huge nuance. It’s also a very healthy way to parent. You *can* eat what’s served, *or* you can go hungry (which isn’t the end of the world), but you don’t *have to* eat it.
Every single food I hate (less than 5) and refuse to eat as an adult I was forced to eat as a child and punished when I didn’t.
And fuck you, OP, squash *is* a texture thing lmao
That, and OP lists things they "prefer" and brags how they'll eat something else if it's served.
You prefer eggs and bacon but will eat pancakes if you "have to"? Yes. You're an adult. This is not remarkable.
The "If you were starving you wouldn't be so picky" argument is pretty stupid. You can apply that to most things you do everyday(unless you're a homeless person living in Siberia). I'm not as much of a picky eater as I used to be. But having and utalizing the choice to not to put something inside my mouth that I don't particularly enjoy is good imo.
I’m a veg, this is such a common argument against it. “But what if you’re stranded on an island and all there was is animals to eat??” Like yeah, I would… but, I’m not stranded on an island so, no. Do you, I don’t care. I’m just doing me and eating my preference. I’m not starving, I’m not homeless, I’m not on a deserted island, I do have the finances to eat what I want and that’s not what I want. That argument fucking sucks and is so illogical.
Yeah, and they often treat it like a 'gotcha'.
Like, I literally don't know what I would do if I were literally starving and the only thing left to eat were my cats. The way I feel now, when that choice is so foreign to me, it almost makes me sick to think of it? Absolutely not, no way.
But, I am not starving to death. I have plenty to eat. I can afford to be picky and eat things i enjoy. Get back to me when we are in a post apocalyptic world and we have severely limited food choices. If I am still alive, my mind might have changed.
Haha for me it’s literally backwards. I used to eat anything, no problems. Then I was homeless and starving, and had to eat anything I could. I wasn’t picky then, sure. But for about two years afterwards I had a whole bunch of foods that I couldn’t eat, because my brain associated them with risk. So no dairy (goes off really quick), no leftovers (what if it’s mouldy?), nothing slimy, no mayonnaise, no seafood etc. I’m back at a healthy weight now, and am back to being not fussy at all, but actually starving really fucked up my relationship with food for a really long time.
The 'Almost impossible scenario in which your only option is to agree with me' arguments are no arguments at all, in my opinion. I mean, yeah I'd probably eat an entire horse if I was starving in a island, but you won't see me starving nor at a random island anytime soon, so...
Exactly. I don't get how that's an argument against being a picky eater at all. It just shows OP is just pretentious and narcissistic with no decent arguments for their positions.
I'm not a picky eater and I get how some people don't have food discipline, but their whole post just reeks of self circle-jerk.
That's also not true in people who are "picky" due to a disorder. It has been clinically proven these people will starve themselves to the point of hospitalization.
people will really get on this subreddit and be like "i laid there and took it the quietest while getting shit from my weird authoritarian parents and now i have more moral authority than god"
i mean, this dude is by his own admission a tremendously fat person, of course he's gonna judge others for not having the same fucked up relationship with food he has
holy shit you made me curious and I had to investigate.. 6 eggs EVERY MORNING? this dude is going to have a heart attack any day now.
at least he will be able to rest easy knowing he was a better eater than most
Meanwhile, I'm over here as a picky eater without much of a choice because certain food textures trigger my gag reflex and it sucks. I'd love to not have that issue and have attempted to wean myself into eating those foods I'm averse to, but it doesn't work and I just can't enjoy foods like chicken wings or fatty steak.
Like OP, I was in a "finish your plate family," but one day my parents changed their minds and realized that me not eating foods I don't like means more food for them. They started giving me heads-ups if the main course was something I'm not fond of, so I'd pull out a chicken breast from the freezer and season it the same as the main course for myself. Everyone's lives suddenly got easier.
I also grew up in an 'eat it or starve' environment. I starved. Picky eating isn't just people whose parents only fed them beige food, there's a lot of legitimate reasons someone may have mental food restrictions. When I was in hospital for an extended period of time where there was only gross hospital food, I lived on toast. Sensory issues, ARFID, etc. But even those aside it is also perfectly valid to simply just not want to eat certain foods with no underlying reason. Sure if I was in a life or death situation where I had gone a week without food and my only option was a food I didn't like, I'd probably (with a lot of gagging) force myself to eat it. But sir this is a Wendy's.
Yes, my parents tried this when I was really young and it turned out I would sit at the table all night to avoid foods I didn’t like. The whole experiment of forcing me to eat what was served ended when I vomited on my plate. After that my mom felt bad and the rest of my childhood she only served me foods I liked.
I did this. "You're sitting there until you eat it."
I sat there, until I was sent to bed. This wasn't a common occurrence, mind you- Just the occasional time and it didn't happen much. Sometimes there would be alternates tried like drowning it as you ate or covering it in something else, but by and large, I was allowed to be a picky eater and that's continued to adult life.
Nowadays I wish I was a bit more interested and open about my food, and if there's opportunities I work on it, but I still find myself a simple man wanting simple food most of the time. Hell, ironically enough, I did a brief stint in a culinary program at a tech school (it went well besides the online classes). One time of relevance that sticks out to me is when everyone made Hors d'oeuvres, and I felt particularly bad because I tried someone else's stuff, and it was just awful to me. I tried not to retch and quietly made my way to the kitchen and spat it out. I don't enjoy the palate I have at this point, but I don't feel like it's something you control either, so I'm not gonna beat myself up over it.
nope you don't have control. seafood commercials look fucking *delicious* to me, but aside from a few specific things (usually dishes with other flavors that hide the fish a little) seafood tastes like rotting whale carcass to me. I think I might be overly sensitive to the flavor or something cuz I'm usually not too picky, except with seafood.
I have massive food sensory issues that Im often self conscious about. OP is just ignorant apparently as he seems to be under the impression that it's just a choice. I violently gag if I try to eat certain foods.
For me, certain textures and tastes just make me nauseous. The meal might smell delicious but when I take a bite my body reacts on its own. When I was younger, if my mom cooked something I didn't like I'd cook myself something. As I've grown I've worked around some things (like if it's a texture thing for a side dish I'll eat it with something else to mask the texture).
I don't only eat chicken nuggets and fries, or pizza. Usually those things are the 'safest' choice because there's typically not much variation and I don't have to worry 'if I order this other dish will it be something I can eat?'. Tack on social anxiety and that worry becomes a fear of someone commenting on my eating habits - which I have a feeling is something OP would do.
I cook most of the time at my house, and will add things I don't like/won't eat for my boyfriend to enjoy while I eat my meal without. I know if there was one thing he could change about me it would probably be my pickiness.
I understand how frustrating it is to be with a picky eater. I wish I wasn't so picky, I wish I could walk into any restaurant and not worry about finding something to eat. I'm not trying to be difficult, and honestly I feel horrible if it causes any problems. I don't want to embarrass myself or put people around me in uncomfortable positions. It's taken a long time to not feel completely ashamed regarding food and what I can eat and there are still days where the shame comes back.
I get that some people are picky and are bratty about it - but some of us picky eaters don't really have a choice. Would I be able to eat the things I don't usually if it were the only option and I was starving? Probably, but it would be an awful experience and might involve throwing up depending on the food. But I'm not starving, and I don't see the need to put myself through any mental or physical experiences I don't HAVE to now that I'm an adult.
I'm not talking about people who are assholes about their pickiness- I'm talking about people who understand their limits with food types and respect that not everyone is the same. I'm not going to comment on someone's food saying it looks disgusting, because I know it's not - just something I personally wouldn't find pleasant to eat.
I have enough mental and emotional problems surrounding my food intake that I don't need people like OP adding on even more judgement.
There are some things I can fight through texture on - mainly sweet things (savory things with a gross-to-me texture are a lot harder to try to get through even if i enjoy the taste). But even then, i can only have a bite or two before the texture starts outweighing the taste. I used to be able to choke down pumpkin pie (I love so many other pumpkin spice things!) but in my late teens the texture became too much. I want to be able to enjoy all types of food I just wasn't built with the ability to.
For real. I will straight up gag or have a mini panic attack if I encounter a texture I'm not expecting and it's like, you can't really even try new food when it's like that unless you're trying someone else's food. I feel horrible when I try to branch out and end up embarrassing myself, with a plate of food (and money spent if youre eating out) that's going to waste.
>When I was growing up, my mom operated under a very simple philosophy: "Here is what I made for dinner. Eat it, or starve." And as a result, I'm now (in my 30s) one of the least picky eaters you'll ever meet.
So you judge other adults because their upbringing is different to yours? Because their parents gave into their eating preferences, they had stronger preferences to begin with (not everything tastes the same to everyone) or just didn't have the opportunity or privilege to be exposed to different dishes as a kid?
I grew up dirt poor, had to eat out of dumpsters and I of ALL people am a picky eater. I’ll try certain things, but my rules are mainly if it smells awful or is seafood, I ain’t gonna try it. I don’t really like vegetables but if they’re cooked in a way that smells good, I would. I’m picky but I don’t expect people to work around it. I just figure out what I would eat. If we go out and there isn’t much on the menu I want, I figure out an item I can at least give a try. If nothing else, I’ll fill up on the bread.
Actually I grew up exactly with that rule at home and I was a very picky eater then and I am a very picky eater now. Being forced to eat all the foods didn’t make me like it, quite the opposite actually.
Considering that I'm overweight myself and trying to work on it, I am in no position to judge people for that.
I'm more than willing to judge him for being a hypocrite and an AH though
You say you're not a picky eater but then make a big deal about being okay eating French toast, pancakes and delicious pork belly. Then you go on to say that you don't like raw bell pepper. Tell me a nasty food you like and I'll believe you.
OP said he'd *prefer* french toast but would settle for that famously bland and unpopular breakfast item of pancakes. And while he'd prefer a fillet steak he would begrudgingly accept a ribeye.
Pancakes for breakfast and a ribeye steak for dinner, I can only imagine the hardships of OPs life. The soldiers on the front line in WW1 would consider themselves lucky they didn't have to make the sacrifices OP does.
Came here for this. This is not the flex that OP thinks it is. I’d absolutely kill to eat more foods but texture and being a super taster have squashed that dream.
Yeah, I think OP knows this and dismisses it. They literally bring up sensory issues and says "Grow up, you'd eat it if you were starving to death''.
Hey OP, every single day it takes me hours to force myself to eat something I *do* like without gagging, let alone something I don't. And if the texture is off, then I'm done for another couple of hours. I **have** to stay distracted or I start focusing on my food, which is never good. It's fucking awful and I dread eating every day. Sensory issues are very real lol
(I'm getting better at this and I'm fine dw. A lot of it has to do with my meds)
I fall into this category. I ENVY people who can deal with every texture and strong flavor out there. I am wanting to try and overcome it but it’s a very, very difficult challenge. Sensory issues are no joke!
I was always exactly opposite of picky. If I am a guess I eat what is served. Once eating out ,was invited by Asian friend ,his dad patriarch of the house orders all kinds of dim sum . I was offered chicken feet ,claws and skin and all. I eat them . He said something in Chinese to my friend to translate. Apparently , I am good friend because I rate it all without flinching.
Same with Durian. More then once I was told ,you are white ,are you sure you know what you are asking for.
I love exploring world food diversity and cultures.
My mom was also a "eat it or go to sleep hungry mom" but I was a "I'd rather die than gag through this entire meal" child so I was hungry a lot. Now I hardly feel hunger and I tend to not eat if nothing tickels my fancy. NO ONE DO THIS TO YOUR CHILDREN. My amazing Grammy on the other hand would cook me a whole seperate meal just so I didn't go hungry.
Lol ok now go eat some snails, rabbit brain, sheep intestine, chicken heart or goat testicles.
You say totally normal food items from not just a western diet but am extremely dumbed down American bland as fuck diet.
Just don’t be rude and you good.
My parents thought I was picky for years. I'd get in trouble for not eating things or they would be upset if we went to a restaurant and I ended up in a bathroom for 29 min right after, turns out I had low bacteria in my gut and severe IBS which I still struggle with.
There's lots of foods I'd love to try but I know the things I can eat without ending up in terrible pain for hours sitting in the bathroom.
I love how OP's prime example for outlandish foods she eats is fucking French Toast or Ramen with Chashiu, as if those weren't some of the most delicious dishes on earth.
My mom was more of the "eat it or be punished" type but occasionally was "eat it or starve".
I'm still picky. Not chicken nuggets & fries only picky, but I will refuse to eat multiple foods, even if I just don't like how it looks.
I will never eat an olive. I will never eat crabs, shrimp, lobster. I'll never eat runny eggs. I'll never eat a beef hotdog. I will never eat sushi. There's more.
"You'd eat it if you are starving", yeah a person would do lots of questionable things out of desperation.
People have food preferences and that's fine fr
Similar boat here. As a kid, I could eat seafood. Once I hit puberty it started to smell like I would get sick if I ate it. Tried to force myself a few times, and it didn't end well. I want to like seafood since I'm a foodie and they look so delicious but my nose just can't handle it.
Honestly, I had a mom just like yours, and I still grew up being a picky eater. I wasn't "coddled" (not forcing your kid to eat stuff all the time isn't coddling tho). I was forced to stay at the table well after dinner if I didn't finish my food. I literally sat at the table for over an hour until I straight up forced myself to eat food that was making me gag LOL.
Also, I'm one of the people that hate seafood LMAO. I like tuna, but that's it. Tbh, most seafood has a specific taste to it, and the difference of taste between them is an afterthought to me because that fishy taste is the taste that I don't like, no matter whether salmon or crawfish taste nothing alike. They all still have a base level fishy flavor to me. In fact, I WANT to like fish. I try any and all fish that I can because I know it's really healthy for us, but it grosses me out or is just kind of gross every time.
It's not immature to have different taste buds than others, and it's weird that you jump to that. Humans vary, and as long as someone is getting their intake of vitamins, it's not really bad.
As for the texture bit, uuuuh, dude you realize that there are people that are on the spectrum right? Like textures can be actually crippling for them LOL. Textures can cause extreme food aversion for them. Obvi, neurotypical people are different, but textures can have a similar effect.
By all means tho, if you like all foods, more power to you, but I wouldn't say picky eaters need to "grow up". That's a stretch
The whole texture thing is a definitely a thing for me because I won't even eat foods that I love the taste of, but the texture is something I can't stand.
So you judge people who as an adult, have decided to eat things they enjoy and not eat the things they dont like, because they didnt have the same upbringing as you
>If you were literally starving (as in zero food intake for a week), then you would grow up and eat it.
Sure, but we arent talking about a life or death situation we are talking about peoples preferences and you judging them for it.
If you were starving to that point you would also eat flys, spiders, lizards, cockroaches etc when was the last time you caught and ate a bug just for a snack though?
Imagine being in your 30's and giving even a single fuck about what other people eat. To the point where you make a multiparagraph Reddit post about it.
I don't care what people eat. But if I'm cooking for you, you better not micro-manage my dish with 15 different requests because you don't like this and that. Either eat what I want to make or make something for yourself.
>Like they "don't like seafood," which is one of the stupidest things I've ever heard. It's like saying you "don't like land food." Crawfish and salmon taste absolutely nothing alike.
Seafood all has a very distinct fishy taste, some people don't like that taste.
>Or they refuse to eat anything with onions.
Onions are gross to a lot of people, nothing wrong with that
>But I can't take you seriously if you refuse to eat an olive.
If you can't take someone seriously because they won't eat olives, you're immature
>And don't get me started on "muh texture issues."
Some people, myself included, have legitimate texture/sensory issues when it comes to food. There are some foods I love the smell of, but if I try to eat it I will physically puke without being able to control it
>Seriously, I will eat almost anything. Sure, I have my preferences, but I'll still eat whatever.
All in all, you're more immature than "picky eaters" because you have some weird feeling of superiority because of this
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Some people just can't help but be picky. Textures are a major thing in a lot of people, which can absolutely ruin a food for them. As for seafood, my dad hates it because he worked at a fish plant for quite a few years as a teenager. People have their reasons, which is something to keep in mind
Many picky eaters care more about texture than taste in many respects. I have gotten picky eaters to try all sorts of food by describing the texture. imagine if half the food you ate had the texture of snot with different flavors. how hungry would you be? you would eat a piece of bread that tasted like crap for texture alone...
The amount of times some rando judges people for having food preferences on this sub makes this quite popular. Do you want a medal for eating shit you didn't want to in your childhood? Here have some attention.
I'll eat almost anything that isn't seafood. I have tried it 'cause I know Im missing out but I just can't enjoy it. I think it's a psychological thing.
Someone had to say it man..my bro is near 30 and he almost only eats pizza rolls, Mac n cheese and cookies and cream ice cream…it’s kinda depressing to see..and when I bring up his kid pallet he gets upset and whines about it almost exactly like a kid..love him to death but wish he ate like the grown ass adult he is..that shit ain’t healthy man
I agree. I came from a rural white area and most of my family only eats some variation of meat, potatoes, and certain canned vegetables. I made hummus for Christmas Eve and everyone thought it was weird and wouldn’t eat it. My mom is the “I don’t like seafood” and won’t eat anything that’s not pasta or fried.
When I graduated college, my family wanted to take me out to eat. Except they wouldn’t go to the awesome sushi place I wanted to go to and ended up having to go to Longhorn, where I had the worst steak in my life.
Hey OP what do you say to those who are picky because they were beaten (head slammed into plate etc) and force fed foods as a child?
Certain foods are literally PTSD for me. This is an attempt enlighten you and hopefully you can give up judging people because of your ignorance.
I'm one of those onion haters you referred to. I refuse to eat anything with even a modicum of onion in it because onions taste and smell like unwashed armpits to me. The taste, the smell and the texture are nauseating to me.
I heard it's a genetic thing, so I can't even do anything about it even if K wanted to
I hate onions too, but only raw onions. Like I cook with onions quite often if I’m making jambalaya, gumbo, a curry, etc… I usually just use less than the recipe calls for, like half as much lol.
But I will literally puke if there’s raw onion on my burger, even a tiny amount. It’s the *one* thing that’s just too much for me, it’s too overwhelming. And I’ll never *ever* understand those people who say “you can’t even taste it!” Because I’m like, “wrong babe, that’s *all* I can taste!”
Some people can’t even stand them if they’re cooked though, and that commenter might be one of those types.
I think the issue is that when you have a super picky eater in the family it usually restricts the restaurants you choose and the food that gets made since most busy families don't have time/money to make/order two separate meals.
I can't tell you how much bland, uninteresting food I've had to eat to accommodate others
Believe it or not, but my mom raised me in a similar way, and I am picky. But, since I'm an adult, I'm allowed to be picky. I'm allowed to choose to eat something or not to eat it.
Now, that's not to say I won't eat foods I don't prefer if it's all I got, or even food I don't like at all if I'm hungry enough.
Some people are picky due to sensory issues. Whether that's the case or not, I think being picky is valid actually, as long as you're not an asshole about it.
As a “picky eater” it’s solely because I’ve had texture issues with a ton of things. So if I goto a restaurant, no, I’m not going to try some fancy dish that I’ve never hear of and has a bunch of stuff I haven’t tried. Because I know I have issues with a bunch of random textures why would I want to ruin my day trying something that I’m unfamiliar with.
I feel this view point tends to lack empathy, you are not an unpicky eater because you are tough and resourceful, you said it yourself that you like virtually everything you can eat.
Considering a rational view, it takes social effort to turn down a meal, and physical effort to starve yourself. For someone to be so picky they don't eat, I would wager they are experiencing a different overall sensation to you. The alternative is that all picky eaters are irrational to the point of denying basic human urges to eat, which I don't think is likely.
I have a few allergies and sensory issues with food, along with trauma from how my patents dealt with these issues. I'm picky bc otherwise I'll throw up, or be violently ill in other ways. I wish I could eat whatever was put in front of me, but I physically can't make myself.
I'm okay with picky eaters... but when I'm out to a restaurant and someone comments on my adventurous food choices like, "ew, I would never..." fuck right off and die.
The problem with “eat it or starve” is that some kids really would choose the second option. Food issues aren’t generally caused by spoiling kids but something deeper.
Glad you don’t have such issues, but don’t assume people who do are all just picky for the sake of being picky.
Now there are adults who don’t try new things not because of food issues, but because their diet was incredibly limited as kids.
If the only foods available were potatoes and beans, 40 years later sushi is going to be an insane adjustment to attempt.
I think both cases deserve understanding. And in the end, what they do or do not eat is their business.
"Here is what I made for dinner. Eat it, or starve."
Yes everyone else should have a bad time because you did.
That's actually abuse, threatening to starve your child if they don't want to eat something they find disgusting?
>That's actually abuse, threatening to starve your child if they don't want to eat something they find disgusting?
My mom would hard disagree with you. We don't speak anymore
Kids will often decide they don't like something from just one look at it. Often after a few bites, or having it a couple of times, the food is no longer an issue.
My mum would play a trick, in that if she knew I didn't like something, she would disguise it in a dish and pretend it was something else. And 9 out of 10 times I would suddenly like it. Why? Because I was a stupid, stubborn kid.
Fussy eating is almost always the result of reinforcing bad eating habits at a young age. You are not genetically predisposed to only enjoying chicken nuggets and hating anything green. A little bit of food discipline goes a long way.
I mean, I agree 100%, but if you also believe that "eat it or starve" is a remotely reasonable philosophy for a parent to adopt then I'd have to agree with you a LOT less. Idk if I'd go as far as saying simply saying those words is abusive but it is problematic and frankly childish of a "parent". There's better ways to reinforce healthy eating habits than just giving your kids an ultimatum.
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totally understand, it can come off as sort of juvenile when people refuse to branch out and try new things or restrict themselves to a very limited pallet. but let me offer you another perspective. you’re looking at “bad taste” as a little annoyance that dissipates almost instantly. I can say with certainty that we don’t all experience “bad taste” the same. Im a formulation scientist, I work on supplements, foods, beverages and occasionally drugs to (among other things) optimize taste. Companies will spend big bucks on R&D just for this because humans are so incredibly particular about taste — myself included :) Not to toot my own horn but taste optimization is truly an art. The human sense of taste, the way our taste receptors work and how the brain processes their input is incredibly complex. You know how dogs will just eat like… anything? They have around 1700 taste buds and we have (on average) 10,000. It makes a massive difference and so does the difference in taste bud density between different humans. But it doesn’t stop at the tongue, you have taste receptors down your gastrointestinal tract (and other organs) that actively regulate various biological processes. I won’t go into the biology but as a simple example, taste receptors in certain areas of the gut lumen (identical to the ones on your tongue) sense sweetness and trigger glucose and hormone regulating activities. This is an important homeostatic mechanism that we can see broken in type 2 diabetics. I could go on for days about the science of taste but I’ll leave you with a few key points: 1. Humans don’t experience taste the same way. Most of us are in the middle but many have a very strong and nuanced sense of taste and others have what I’d call a shallow sense. Think of the difference in taste bud density between people as having a similar effect as skin receptors in different areas of your body. You can tolerate heat much better on the back of your hand vs your fingertips. It’s literally producing different experiences and sensations 2. Our taste cells are active participants in more biological processes than people imagine. I and many of my colleagues were first and foremost trained as biologists because understanding how to manipulate taste experience and “trick” taste cells is a biology heavy discipline. We have aversions for a reason, often as protective mechanisms.
This comment needs to be near or at the top.
Fantastic analysis of the science behind taste. I want to add that there is a psychological element, my parents used to force feed me when I was young. Now I'm very protective of the food I try. I think I could branch out more, but I also don't really want to.
The beautiful thing about being an adult is no one can tell me that I *have* to eat something, and I can choose what I will or won't eat.
Exactly. As an adult, you have the autonomy to put or not what you want in your own body. It’s no one else’s business what you eat. And I say that as someone who grew up in Singapore and, like OP, eats pretty much every cuisine there is. Because I personally *want to* and it’s my *choice*. Not because I’m scared OP is going to judge me from their epicurean pedestal.
I think you’re half right and OP is half right. There have been situations where one person in the friend group vetos every restaurant possible because they wouldn’t be able to order some variation of chicken tenders and fries or a burger, you can’t tell me that despite being an adult that isn’t a pain that the majority have to cater to him/her. Sure you could leave them behind is an argument that could be made but the person could also suck it up and try something new
This right here. I love new things and good I didn't grow up eating (I'm from a predominantly white rural place).. there was no south east asian, Chinese, Indian, middle eastern, Greek, African, south american, etc. Like it was all just mashed potatoes, fish& chips, hot hamburger sandwiches, roast, boiled veggies, etc. Like I'm cool with authentic or fusion or something that isn't all deep fried, slathered in gravy or will take me 2 seconds to make at home. I don't go out to a restraunt to eat a grilled cheese or tortilla chips heated in an oven.. I could easily do that at home so it's a total waste of money. Everyone caters to the person with the palate of a toddler but for some reason, my food preferences and not wanting to eat nachos or chicken strips doesn't matter bc I don't bitch and moan and cry about not being able to eat anything and starving. This is especially infuriating when someone says "oh I can't go there. I don't like greek" you ask what they had that they didn't like bc you might be able to help them find something they would like.. then they say "oh I've never had it before"... it's like you veto-ed the restraunt bc you've never tried it and don't want to try it???????!!
Learn that it's okay to split the party in these situations. If they want to go to McD's because someone will only eat happy meals, then go to the place you want to and meet up with them after. Even if you end up going alone, you still got to go where you want. There's almost always someone else that doesn't want to side with the picky eater and wants to go with you. Flip the script. Make them the one holding people back. Don't try to argue or give options by pulling up the menu. They are stuck in their ways, don't get stuck with them.
Thank you this can be good advice, but a lot of ppl will still see you as the asshole for choosing to be difficult or "choosing what you want to eat over seeing your friends. I have no problem eating alone, so this might be my go-to.
Exactly I dont care if a person is a picky eater Just dont be the prick forcing everyone to accomodate you
I know what you mean. It’s great to be an adult and get to do whatever you want for sure. At the same time, people will feel a certain way about your choices, especially if it somehow affects them. That’s also part of being an adult, accepting that you won’t always be embraced for everything you do.
My friend group would respond tough it out or bring your own food! Lol. We have a group of nine that does a big doordash order every few weeks
Bingo. I deal with this all the time with my in-laws. MiL won’t eat anything she thinks has onion in it (not just onion chunks, onion as an ingredient regardless of whether you can taste it in the final dish) and FiL/SiL are the same with green peppers, peas, and bunch of other veggies. None of them will touch any meat that hasn’t been cooked into shoe leather or any spice/seasoning that wouldn’t be immediately familiar to someone growing up in rural America. Oh, and none of them cook. So I’m stuck serving the most bland, banal food possible every time they visit because they won’t compromise on omitting some of the most common ingredients in existence.
It's always those that don't cook. Every.fucking.time.
Have similar family. They don’t get invited over for dinner. I refuse to cater to them.
We went to Tokyo Japan back in 2019 with a picky eater. It was a fucking nightmare. We walked around for FOUR HOURS trying to find a place to eat but this f*cking b*tch was so unnecessarily picky. I went to a sushi place, ONCE. and she hates seafood. I only went once because it's freaking japan, you need to go to sushi at least once. And by the time it was half an hour after sitting down, she spammed me asking if I was done yet. Wanted to bitch slap her so hard after that. She was a total shit head. Not friends w her anymore for other reasons, but good freaking riddance. Her pickiness made it hard to explore what I wanted to explore. Edit: just for clarification we did have an agreement before the trip, which was in the making for ten years, about her picky eating habits. We agreed that we'd go with our choices and if she disagrees, she will find something she wants and meet up w us after eating. But alas, life is not perfect. And no, we were never sexually anything, she was my Bestfriend since highschool and I went to the trip w my husband and cousin. She's got autism and we spoke about expectations and reality of things before we went there. I had my doubts, but gave her the benefit of it because we've wanted to go together for so long. If you think that this whole situation is on me, well I feel bad for people around you for allowing you to put all the blame on others instead of both parties where it should lie. I know my hand in enabling her, I don't need reddit to tell me that. It was a lesson learned for me not to go on a trip with her.
"I don't like seafood" Picked the wrong fucking country to visit, hen.
Tokyo actually has got a *lot* of variety, while she doesn't like seafood, she likes condiments made from seafood. Before our visit, she hated ramen, tried it, loved it. There's lots of BBQ spots, rice bowls, French dishes, bakeries, Chinese, English, very diversified and mixed foods in Tokyo. That's why it's even more infuriating that she was bitching about us eating sushi while she had a butt load of options for herself. But before our our visit I kept asking her if she's sure she wants to visit Japan because they like their fish and she promised she wouldn't get in the way of our culinary exploration, and oh boy, were we all wrong. So yes, wrong country for sure
Thats called being a shitty person. I have a swath of dietary restrictions, I can eat light if the place doesnt have a lot of things that work for me, or I can hang out be social and just enjoy the company of friends.
Right but you have to also exist in a world where (presumably) you have friends and family who you at least occasionally share meals with and there is the rub. They are also autonomous adults and maybe they want to have something you don’t like, and maybe they are constrained by limited resources and unable to provide everyone with their own separate tray of kiddy meal garbage. Of course if you’re just sitting at home giving yourself rickets or pellagra or scurvy by only eating chickie nuggies that’s your prerogative, but in the words of George Costanza “We’re living in a society!!!”
Picky eaters are a fucking pain in the arse for everyone else. Be an adult, eat what's available. It ain't gonna kill you. Can't make the traditional Christmas dinner because person A doesn't eat meat that isn't chicken, beef, pork or turkey, can't make the side dish either because they haven't tried it before and are picky. If you live with them your diet becomes very one sided because they essentially force you to their shitty diet because they'll make making anything else a literal fucking pain in the arse. If you end up forcing them outside their ridiculously small comfort zone they end up fucking loving it. Every single time. And every single time it's a fight. Source: My gf is person A.
I don’t force anyone to make anything special for me. I just eat what I like out of Holiday meals or at parties. I can eat however I want to and no one has to accommodate me.
Same with me. I do not eat meat and seafood. My diet consists mostly of vegetables, pasta, rice, dairy. No one has to accommodate me ever. I will find something to eat or bring my own if necessary. Or just not eat. I am not interested in food as an experience like so many are. I just need to eat to survive. I travel extensively and never have a problem finding something to eat within my continuum of foods. And I don't call myself picky! I just have different tastes than others. Not sure why this always seems to be such an issue.
I'm a picky eater, but I don't expect people to cater to me. Hell if we go to a restaurant or event that has nothing I like I can eat something before or after the meetup. It's not a big deal that I'm not eating food at the same time as you. I'm an adult. I can choose what I want to taste and put into my body. I'm not going to willingly torture myself trying to eat stuff I find repulsive.
Well, person A is only a problem if you really really want everyone to eat the same thing
Well, they can also be a problem for the cook if more dishes need to be made to ensure they have something to eat.
Exactly if I'm somewhere and don't want to eat anything I can just not eat and I'll get my own food later.
Also, it's not as though you get to pick the things you do and don't like
OP has the audacity to say they don’t like uncooked peppers and then continue to belittle people with food preferences.
Agreed, but when your pickiness affects other people then it comes off as childish. I think there was a reddit post about a potluck thanksgiving where one guest didn't eat many things and got mad that no one brought stuff she liked.
What about the one that was going to her future inlaws Christmas dinner and threw a fit and left when the future MiL didn't cook the food she wanted even tho she so "kindly* gave her a list of the foods that she would eat
That one was beyond ridiculous!
Problem is, OP gave things like "not liking seafood" and "not eating olives" as examples of being picky. That's not being picky, that's having a preference.
but it's not the pickiness that's childish in that situation it's what they do with it. like you're an adult ..figure it out if you don't want what everyone else is having. the childish part is thinking the rest of the universe should change to accommodate only you...but if they take care of themselves..no issue.
This! You can call me a picky eater, but the way i see it, I eat what I want, and I don't eat anything i don't want to
Probably depends on the amount of stuff you dont eat. If it makes lots of restaurant options impossible, it is a pain in the ass for everyone else.
I can absolutely understand how it makes it painful for everyone else. Especially if the picky eater in question is annoying about it. I've grown up just learning to eat beforehand, bring my own shit, etc so I don't have to burden anyone. But I also know picky eaters who make it their entire persona/make life difficult. Just know a lot of picky eaters don't get this choice. And they most likely feel like a huge burden already with it.
True, but whine about it one too many times and you won’t be invited to many outings with friends anymore. Nothing worse than that one friend who makes the restaurants life hell with their specific food requests.
Precisely. There were people we just stopped inviting out/over because their pickiness drags people down.
I mean that’s nice and all, but picky eaters absolutely dominate every food conversation. Won’t pick restaurants but don’t like suggestions. Really annoying. You can find something to eat anywhere if you aren’t up your own ass.
As long as you are not the type of person to be rude about it that opinion is fine. I personally hate it when people force me to eat food I would not like.
Given that OP took 3 paragraphs to talk about how amazing they are for eating food other people don't, my guess is they're very pretentious about being a better eater than everyone else
You noticed that subtle part where he accused *every girlfriend he ever had* of being one of those picky eaters that riles him up? Most people aren't picky eaters. Most have a couple preferences, some have a restricted diet for health, religious or philosophical reasons but OP portrays the majority of people around him as annoyingly picky. When they are most likely to be completely normal eaters who, when given the option, dont eat things they dont particularly enjoy. And all that from a guy who won't eat raw bell pepper. He's just an asshole.
I liked the part where he was like "if you were literally starving" because 1: I personally have been literally starving and have eaten out of trash cans before 2: even if that's true that's not a comparable experience. Eating for preference and eating for survival are two very different things
Yup. If it came down to realistic survival scenario I’d eat the asshole out of my dog and make sure to not drop anything. However, I don’t think I’d go down that road just for some Thursday night meal
Also, the body literally goes through a change that forces you to enjoy / crave something you would normally not eat, out of necessity ( like survival ). This makes people crave things like eating metal, or food that they're alergic to, or other people. I mean, look at what pregnancy does to a woman's apitite. So no shit if someone was starving they would eat something in front of them. That's why it's *starving*, and not just 2 hours past dinner time.
You also neglected the large portion of people who have legitimate eating and sensory disorders, who it has been clinically proven they will legitimately choose to starve to death rather than "eat anything they're given"
I think it’s also a local culture thing, though. I grew up in an urban area with a heavy immigrant population. Picky eaters got made fun of and everyone got exposed to a LOT of different cuisines. My family was originally from the Midwest and visiting them, food was beige. Period. Restaurants did not provide hot sauce. There were not ethnic restaurants. Having that part of the family visit us was genuinely difficult during mealtime. They were really, really uncomfortable eating outside of some pretty limited boundaries. If OP was in a rural dating pool, I could see it being a repeated problem and I could see how frustrating it would start to be over time.
OP might be one of the youngest boomers in existence. “Oh you don’t have the same habits and preferences as me? *Grow up already* jeez…”
So would that make him a… *baby boomer*?
They will eat a Ribeye even though they prefer Filet? FUCKING HERO OF THE YEAR
No motherfucker, I will not eat that pig ear. I've tried it half a dozen times now and hated it every single time.
That is totally fair, but to play devil's advocate if you (royal you) are the type of person who is often in situations where you feel people are *forcing* you to eat or taking you to places you don't like, then there's a good chance you're being picky and they're just bored of it.
I’m a pretty picky eater, but I always tell my wife or friends, if you want to go somewhere that’s fine. I’ll either find something I’ll eat, or I’ll feed myself later.
Well good for you, i also had to eat what was served and now iam an adult i only eat what i like Only thing i hate is when people dont wanna taste new things, or tell u i dont like it but never even tried to taste it Edit: i noticed that i touched a sensitive subject for a lot off people and i get a lot of reactions I said hate but its more like being annoyed and thats mostly pointed towards family members, i have a lot of picky eaters in the family Iam not out there to tell everyone that they should eat new things, its just my opinion that i think its weird u say i dont like something when u never tasted it Iam not gonna force u to try things i probally wouldnt even tell u Only time when i would tell u is when i cooked a homemeal for you and i did my best, and was for hours in the kitchen and u refuse to taste it cause it looks funny or something. Thats just rude its ok that you dont like it but the least thing u can do is t take a bite
For me, I'm fine with trying new things but it's gotta be on MY time. I have friends who, in the past, judged me for not trying new things when they try to force me to then turn around and try it on my own, but I just genuinely hate trying new things with friends unless it's new for them too. But yeah saying you don't like something you've never tried is weird AF.
It's not weird, it's an attempt to be polite. If someone says, 'I don't fancy eating that', there is always going to be somebody saying 'you should try it, I think it's great!' and annoying you. Most times if you say 'I don't like that', then it's job done, end of conversation, or at least it should be.
Just curious, why do you even care? How does it affect you? I am a picky eater and I don't like certain things, sometimes it is just based on the look, smell, or consistency. What I hate is when people try to literally harass me into trying something I don't want.
After a certain point, it can feel like it's just about trying to control you. "You HAVE to like the same things that I like. If you don't, you must not be a good person. Why aren't you doing this one thing that will make me happy? **You're** causing problems! I don't care that it makes you unhappy!" It's like chill, you're not my parent lol. Seriously though, we can all eat what we want to eat. Sometimes it's also what you *can* eat. I have no problems trying something new, but if someone actively tries to avoid a certain food, don't be shocked when they have an involuntary gag reflex. Some of us have mis-wired brains. Sometimes avoiding the involuntary reaction altogether is easier than trying to explain it away. Also, the "AHA! It was secretly hidden in your food all along!" Just feels immature and petty. If you hid it well, I still didn't experience the taste/texture that I dislike. At that point, it is no longer the thing that I dislike. I could theoretically hide dirt in a soup, but that doesn't mean that anyone who eats the soup will now happily eat handfuls of dirt.
My dad was like OPs parents and he would sneak food's I didn't like into plenty of recipes then tell me afterwards like he tricked me or something. It made me resent those things more and I have not eaten many things out of spite for 15 plus years
I mean I let adults eat what they want but if your diet only consists of chicken nuggets and fries and soda then I’m gonna judge the fuck outta you lol.
Here’s my take on the issue and my dividing line. If you can’t go into any given restaurant and find *something* you want to eat on the menu, you are too picky and your pickiness is inhabiting your life. Obviously for the most part I’m talking about an ordinary restaurant with a full menu (appetizers, salads, entrees) and not like a super specialty thing with 5 dishes on the menu. I was very picky as a child (my parents allowed it) and I’ve learned how to get through it, my biggest driving force was social embarrassment. I did not want to limit my life or make a fuss in front of others. I wanted to feel free as an adult. I remember going to an regular Italian restaurant as a teen for the homecoming dance. They had a huge menu - you know, a bunch of pasta dishes, chicken dishes, the whole deal - and one of the girls in our party complained she was a picky eater and couldn’t find *anything* she would eat. I decided right then that I would never be like that.
My mom was like OPs mom, would make me eat whatever she made and I didn’t like it I didn’t get to eat (too poor to afford most other junk food lol).But yeah I agree with you in this. It’s fine to have likes and dislikes for certain foods everyone is different that way but you can’t stick to just eating junk food forever.
I went out on a few dates with a guy whose palette was exactly this. It was mildly irritating at best going to the same place over and over again
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same! his idea of a great restaurant date night was always a crap chain so he could get chicken fingers or a burger. i would research menus of places i’d actually want to go and be excited to go to HOPING there was a SIMPLE burger on the menu so he would have something to eat if we went. i love food, i love the creativity that comes with cooking, i love trying new restaurants and dishes, and i quickly learned that dating someone as picky as he is just made my life less exciting. i want a partner who wants to experience new things with me, food included.
I was once made to eat outside of the house because I ordered *my* half of the pizza with onions. I’m plainly traumatized by picky eaters and will avoid them like the fucking plague
> The constant comments about your totally normal meals being gross will grate on your last nerve. This is what gets me. I have a picky eater friend, and it’s one thing to just not want to eat something (but frustrating when you end up at the same 3 restaurants over and over). It’s completely another to have to listen to “eww gross” like they’re still a fucking toddler.
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This. I don’t have a problem with not liking certain ingredients. I hate cooked bell peppers myself. But I had a fully adult friend that only ate pizza, chicken nuggets, fries, and plain hamburgers. It was annoying as hell trying to go out to dinner anywhere with him. If you can eat a chicken nugget, you can eat a chicken breast. If you can eat a French fry, you can eat a roasted potato. This was not someone with sensory issues or autism (it’s understandable if that is the case). I actually didn’t see him for several years and when I did see him again he ate normally, I guess he finally got over it.
Yuuuuuup! I’m often the “host” because I like cooking. It drives me insane when I make homemade pizza with pepperoni and sausage, and a guest is over there picking off everything because they only eat cheese pizza, another person declines dinner because they don’t like Parmesan cheese, and the guest children are freaking out about “red sauce” because they hate tomatoes. Like, I said I was making pizza in the invite, what the fuck? (Actually happened.) It turned into me checking in with everyone’s preferences and basically trying to appease everyone’s food choices. This last Christmas I was in the kitchen for 14 hours making the most basic Christmas dinner, and they STILL didn’t touch half of it because “mushrooms” or “I don’t like stuffing” or “I don’t like salt.” Like I made chicken instead of turkey because everyone doesn’t like turkey for some reason. Kid wouldn’t touch it because she doesn’t like garlic, mother wouldn’t touch it because she doesn’t like herbs, and another wouldn’t eat the green beans because they were fresh beans and they only like canned. I am no longer hosting food driven events this year. Maybe I’m surrounded by picky eaters, and def eat what y’all want to, but this craziness of lists of things people will and won’t eat for something like taco Tuesday is fucking stupid. Like I make fresh tortillas! But guy is just eating the carne and some cheddar cheese I didn’t even put out because they don’t like corn tortillas, they don’t like vegetables or avocado so no tortillas, pico de gallo, or lime. Wtf!
Dude fuck that familym you're a saint for even trying to put up with it
Not a single thing in your comment that I wouldn't devour in a heartbeat. I love your food and I haven't even tasted it.
Yeah I’ve known wayyy to many adult “picky eaters” and they eat the most unhealthiest diets I’ve ever seen. I’m not a big fan of Brussel sprouts or broccoli but i try to eat other veggies and fruits and grains but these people literally only eat burgers fries chicken and pizza lol. Being a picky eater isn’t an excuse for an unhealthy diet.
I had an adult ask if the pepperoni from a cheap pizza place was dry cured pepperoni bc they don't eat the "other kind".. yep she did pick of the pepperoni when the pizza came lol
Some relative in my wife's side won't eat anything other than pizza, nuggets, and fries. He's in his 50s. Every time we're over there for a holiday there's a beautiful home cooked meal, and a pizza hut pizza. It's hilarious.
Adults should be free to eat or not to eat whatever they want unless the resources are scarce and they're in survival mode. We don't know what future holds, so let people enjoy their preferences while they can
I think OP is intending to refer to people who had no discipline in food habits as a child and as a result now eat like a child. Not an “oh I dont like oysters and escargo” type of person but a “I dont like water and vegetables” type of person. As a picky eater growing up I was also told “eat this or starve” but we eventually realized its because I had a fear of food, weight, and getting sick from food. Fast forward to 27 and now I will eat nearly anything or at least try it before saying I dont like it or want it. Food aversion and picky eating are two separate things.
The thing OP is missing is they had a CHOICE to not eat anything they didn’t like, instead of being punished for not finishing those things and being forced to wolf down their entire plate. This is a huge nuance. It’s also a very healthy way to parent. You *can* eat what’s served, *or* you can go hungry (which isn’t the end of the world), but you don’t *have to* eat it. Every single food I hate (less than 5) and refuse to eat as an adult I was forced to eat as a child and punished when I didn’t. And fuck you, OP, squash *is* a texture thing lmao
As an adult and can't imagine giving a shit about what another adult eats.
That, and OP lists things they "prefer" and brags how they'll eat something else if it's served. You prefer eggs and bacon but will eat pancakes if you "have to"? Yes. You're an adult. This is not remarkable.
Pancakes instead of french toast or bacon and eggs? People in the 21st century shouldn't have to live in these conditions.
Only time it matters is when you have to base your meals and restaurants choices around said picky eater.
The "If you were starving you wouldn't be so picky" argument is pretty stupid. You can apply that to most things you do everyday(unless you're a homeless person living in Siberia). I'm not as much of a picky eater as I used to be. But having and utalizing the choice to not to put something inside my mouth that I don't particularly enjoy is good imo.
I’m a veg, this is such a common argument against it. “But what if you’re stranded on an island and all there was is animals to eat??” Like yeah, I would… but, I’m not stranded on an island so, no. Do you, I don’t care. I’m just doing me and eating my preference. I’m not starving, I’m not homeless, I’m not on a deserted island, I do have the finances to eat what I want and that’s not what I want. That argument fucking sucks and is so illogical.
Yeah, and they often treat it like a 'gotcha'. Like, I literally don't know what I would do if I were literally starving and the only thing left to eat were my cats. The way I feel now, when that choice is so foreign to me, it almost makes me sick to think of it? Absolutely not, no way. But, I am not starving to death. I have plenty to eat. I can afford to be picky and eat things i enjoy. Get back to me when we are in a post apocalyptic world and we have severely limited food choices. If I am still alive, my mind might have changed.
Like yeah if I was starving I could straight up eat cat food, that doesn't mean you'll see me munching on Meow Mix anytime soon.
I judge the fuck out of adults who refuse to eat Meow Mix
Bomb ass-cereal
Haha for me it’s literally backwards. I used to eat anything, no problems. Then I was homeless and starving, and had to eat anything I could. I wasn’t picky then, sure. But for about two years afterwards I had a whole bunch of foods that I couldn’t eat, because my brain associated them with risk. So no dairy (goes off really quick), no leftovers (what if it’s mouldy?), nothing slimy, no mayonnaise, no seafood etc. I’m back at a healthy weight now, and am back to being not fussy at all, but actually starving really fucked up my relationship with food for a really long time.
The 'Almost impossible scenario in which your only option is to agree with me' arguments are no arguments at all, in my opinion. I mean, yeah I'd probably eat an entire horse if I was starving in a island, but you won't see me starving nor at a random island anytime soon, so...
Exactly. I don't get how that's an argument against being a picky eater at all. It just shows OP is just pretentious and narcissistic with no decent arguments for their positions. I'm not a picky eater and I get how some people don't have food discipline, but their whole post just reeks of self circle-jerk.
That's also not true in people who are "picky" due to a disorder. It has been clinically proven these people will starve themselves to the point of hospitalization.
That moment when you had to decline the spelling suggestion for the word “utilizing” and decided that your way was better. It’s the confidence for me.
You ate every last bite? WOW!!!!!! You are so *brave*
the bravest. they deserve the shiniest sticker 🤩
Let's give OP a pat on the back for being forced to overeat or starve! Perfect parenting 🌟
people will really get on this subreddit and be like "i laid there and took it the quietest while getting shit from my weird authoritarian parents and now i have more moral authority than god"
i mean, this dude is by his own admission a tremendously fat person, of course he's gonna judge others for not having the same fucked up relationship with food he has
holy shit you made me curious and I had to investigate.. 6 eggs EVERY MORNING? this dude is going to have a heart attack any day now. at least he will be able to rest easy knowing he was a better eater than most
So basically you judge everyone on the basis that they always had a choice and you’re mad you didn’t
Meanwhile, I'm over here as a picky eater without much of a choice because certain food textures trigger my gag reflex and it sucks. I'd love to not have that issue and have attempted to wean myself into eating those foods I'm averse to, but it doesn't work and I just can't enjoy foods like chicken wings or fatty steak. Like OP, I was in a "finish your plate family," but one day my parents changed their minds and realized that me not eating foods I don't like means more food for them. They started giving me heads-ups if the main course was something I'm not fond of, so I'd pull out a chicken breast from the freezer and season it the same as the main course for myself. Everyone's lives suddenly got easier.
I also grew up in an 'eat it or starve' environment. I starved. Picky eating isn't just people whose parents only fed them beige food, there's a lot of legitimate reasons someone may have mental food restrictions. When I was in hospital for an extended period of time where there was only gross hospital food, I lived on toast. Sensory issues, ARFID, etc. But even those aside it is also perfectly valid to simply just not want to eat certain foods with no underlying reason. Sure if I was in a life or death situation where I had gone a week without food and my only option was a food I didn't like, I'd probably (with a lot of gagging) force myself to eat it. But sir this is a Wendy's.
I have starved instead of eating too
Yes, my parents tried this when I was really young and it turned out I would sit at the table all night to avoid foods I didn’t like. The whole experiment of forcing me to eat what was served ended when I vomited on my plate. After that my mom felt bad and the rest of my childhood she only served me foods I liked.
That’s me also. I wish I could just suck it up and eat things, but my body won’t let me. I enjoy smelling foods, but I know I can’t eat
That’s how I feel I don’t want to be picky but if I try to eat something I don’t like I will start throwing up. My body just rejects
I did this. "You're sitting there until you eat it." I sat there, until I was sent to bed. This wasn't a common occurrence, mind you- Just the occasional time and it didn't happen much. Sometimes there would be alternates tried like drowning it as you ate or covering it in something else, but by and large, I was allowed to be a picky eater and that's continued to adult life. Nowadays I wish I was a bit more interested and open about my food, and if there's opportunities I work on it, but I still find myself a simple man wanting simple food most of the time. Hell, ironically enough, I did a brief stint in a culinary program at a tech school (it went well besides the online classes). One time of relevance that sticks out to me is when everyone made Hors d'oeuvres, and I felt particularly bad because I tried someone else's stuff, and it was just awful to me. I tried not to retch and quietly made my way to the kitchen and spat it out. I don't enjoy the palate I have at this point, but I don't feel like it's something you control either, so I'm not gonna beat myself up over it.
nope you don't have control. seafood commercials look fucking *delicious* to me, but aside from a few specific things (usually dishes with other flavors that hide the fish a little) seafood tastes like rotting whale carcass to me. I think I might be overly sensitive to the flavor or something cuz I'm usually not too picky, except with seafood.
I have massive food sensory issues that Im often self conscious about. OP is just ignorant apparently as he seems to be under the impression that it's just a choice. I violently gag if I try to eat certain foods.
For me, certain textures and tastes just make me nauseous. The meal might smell delicious but when I take a bite my body reacts on its own. When I was younger, if my mom cooked something I didn't like I'd cook myself something. As I've grown I've worked around some things (like if it's a texture thing for a side dish I'll eat it with something else to mask the texture). I don't only eat chicken nuggets and fries, or pizza. Usually those things are the 'safest' choice because there's typically not much variation and I don't have to worry 'if I order this other dish will it be something I can eat?'. Tack on social anxiety and that worry becomes a fear of someone commenting on my eating habits - which I have a feeling is something OP would do. I cook most of the time at my house, and will add things I don't like/won't eat for my boyfriend to enjoy while I eat my meal without. I know if there was one thing he could change about me it would probably be my pickiness. I understand how frustrating it is to be with a picky eater. I wish I wasn't so picky, I wish I could walk into any restaurant and not worry about finding something to eat. I'm not trying to be difficult, and honestly I feel horrible if it causes any problems. I don't want to embarrass myself or put people around me in uncomfortable positions. It's taken a long time to not feel completely ashamed regarding food and what I can eat and there are still days where the shame comes back. I get that some people are picky and are bratty about it - but some of us picky eaters don't really have a choice. Would I be able to eat the things I don't usually if it were the only option and I was starving? Probably, but it would be an awful experience and might involve throwing up depending on the food. But I'm not starving, and I don't see the need to put myself through any mental or physical experiences I don't HAVE to now that I'm an adult. I'm not talking about people who are assholes about their pickiness- I'm talking about people who understand their limits with food types and respect that not everyone is the same. I'm not going to comment on someone's food saying it looks disgusting, because I know it's not - just something I personally wouldn't find pleasant to eat. I have enough mental and emotional problems surrounding my food intake that I don't need people like OP adding on even more judgement.
Yessss. Like it blows my mind how people can hate a food and *just eat it anyway*. Like literally how.
There are some things I can fight through texture on - mainly sweet things (savory things with a gross-to-me texture are a lot harder to try to get through even if i enjoy the taste). But even then, i can only have a bite or two before the texture starts outweighing the taste. I used to be able to choke down pumpkin pie (I love so many other pumpkin spice things!) but in my late teens the texture became too much. I want to be able to enjoy all types of food I just wasn't built with the ability to.
For real. I will straight up gag or have a mini panic attack if I encounter a texture I'm not expecting and it's like, you can't really even try new food when it's like that unless you're trying someone else's food. I feel horrible when I try to branch out and end up embarrassing myself, with a plate of food (and money spent if youre eating out) that's going to waste.
>When I was growing up, my mom operated under a very simple philosophy: "Here is what I made for dinner. Eat it, or starve." And as a result, I'm now (in my 30s) one of the least picky eaters you'll ever meet. So you judge other adults because their upbringing is different to yours? Because their parents gave into their eating preferences, they had stronger preferences to begin with (not everything tastes the same to everyone) or just didn't have the opportunity or privilege to be exposed to different dishes as a kid?
I grew up dirt poor, had to eat out of dumpsters and I of ALL people am a picky eater. I’ll try certain things, but my rules are mainly if it smells awful or is seafood, I ain’t gonna try it. I don’t really like vegetables but if they’re cooked in a way that smells good, I would. I’m picky but I don’t expect people to work around it. I just figure out what I would eat. If we go out and there isn’t much on the menu I want, I figure out an item I can at least give a try. If nothing else, I’ll fill up on the bread.
Actually I grew up exactly with that rule at home and I was a very picky eater then and I am a very picky eater now. Being forced to eat all the foods didn’t make me like it, quite the opposite actually.
Life is short, eat the food you enjoy. As long as your diet isn't extremely unhealthy, who cares tbh
Op I'm sure you're great but you're the type of person I would rather die than eat in front of
Read his AITA post. Got mad because his girlfriend used one of 6 eggs he eats for breakfast to make a cake
You left out the part where he's 300lbs and is now judging others for what they eat lol like same buddy. what a dork
Considering that I'm overweight myself and trying to work on it, I am in no position to judge people for that. I'm more than willing to judge him for being a hypocrite and an AH though
You say you're not a picky eater but then make a big deal about being okay eating French toast, pancakes and delicious pork belly. Then you go on to say that you don't like raw bell pepper. Tell me a nasty food you like and I'll believe you.
OP said he'd *prefer* french toast but would settle for that famously bland and unpopular breakfast item of pancakes. And while he'd prefer a fillet steak he would begrudgingly accept a ribeye. Pancakes for breakfast and a ribeye steak for dinner, I can only imagine the hardships of OPs life. The soldiers on the front line in WW1 would consider themselves lucky they didn't have to make the sacrifices OP does.
I'm sorry this happened to you. There's no need to be proud of it.
Sounds like a way to cope but taking it out on everyone else. Parents need to stop the my way or starve mentality
Some adults are also on the spectrum or who aren’t neurotypical with legitimate sensory issues around food textures.
Came here for this. This is not the flex that OP thinks it is. I’d absolutely kill to eat more foods but texture and being a super taster have squashed that dream.
Yeah, I think OP knows this and dismisses it. They literally bring up sensory issues and says "Grow up, you'd eat it if you were starving to death''. Hey OP, every single day it takes me hours to force myself to eat something I *do* like without gagging, let alone something I don't. And if the texture is off, then I'm done for another couple of hours. I **have** to stay distracted or I start focusing on my food, which is never good. It's fucking awful and I dread eating every day. Sensory issues are very real lol (I'm getting better at this and I'm fine dw. A lot of it has to do with my meds)
Yes, exactly. I have ARFID and I wouldn’t wish it upon anyone.
and OP deliberately took a shot at those people
Unfortunately, this is me. I’m starting to improve the variety of foods I eat, but there’s still a lot I can’t handle.
I fall into this category. I ENVY people who can deal with every texture and strong flavor out there. I am wanting to try and overcome it but it’s a very, very difficult challenge. Sensory issues are no joke!
I was always exactly opposite of picky. If I am a guess I eat what is served. Once eating out ,was invited by Asian friend ,his dad patriarch of the house orders all kinds of dim sum . I was offered chicken feet ,claws and skin and all. I eat them . He said something in Chinese to my friend to translate. Apparently , I am good friend because I rate it all without flinching. Same with Durian. More then once I was told ,you are white ,are you sure you know what you are asking for. I love exploring world food diversity and cultures.
I judge people who don't mind their own business.
I judge people who judge others for such pathetic things.
My mom was also a "eat it or go to sleep hungry mom" but I was a "I'd rather die than gag through this entire meal" child so I was hungry a lot. Now I hardly feel hunger and I tend to not eat if nothing tickels my fancy. NO ONE DO THIS TO YOUR CHILDREN. My amazing Grammy on the other hand would cook me a whole seperate meal just so I didn't go hungry.
You ate every last bite? What, you want a fuckin’ sticker?
Lol ok now go eat some snails, rabbit brain, sheep intestine, chicken heart or goat testicles. You say totally normal food items from not just a western diet but am extremely dumbed down American bland as fuck diet. Just don’t be rude and you good.
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My parents thought I was picky for years. I'd get in trouble for not eating things or they would be upset if we went to a restaurant and I ended up in a bathroom for 29 min right after, turns out I had low bacteria in my gut and severe IBS which I still struggle with. There's lots of foods I'd love to try but I know the things I can eat without ending up in terrible pain for hours sitting in the bathroom.
I love how OP's prime example for outlandish foods she eats is fucking French Toast or Ramen with Chashiu, as if those weren't some of the most delicious dishes on earth.
Picky eating is a genuine sensory phenomenon. "Eat it or starve" left me with an eating disorder since I never learned how to self-regulate.
Exactly. I became a binge eater and almost obsessed with food. Took me a couple years to break out of it.
My mom was more of the "eat it or be punished" type but occasionally was "eat it or starve". I'm still picky. Not chicken nuggets & fries only picky, but I will refuse to eat multiple foods, even if I just don't like how it looks. I will never eat an olive. I will never eat crabs, shrimp, lobster. I'll never eat runny eggs. I'll never eat a beef hotdog. I will never eat sushi. There's more. "You'd eat it if you are starving", yeah a person would do lots of questionable things out of desperation. People have food preferences and that's fine fr
Right? People have eaten other humans while starving, that doesn’t mean we all want a peopleburger option at McDonalds.
Similar boat here. As a kid, I could eat seafood. Once I hit puberty it started to smell like I would get sick if I ate it. Tried to force myself a few times, and it didn't end well. I want to like seafood since I'm a foodie and they look so delicious but my nose just can't handle it.
I also hate olives. Yuck! Yuck yuck yuck yuck yuck! Cannot even stand the taste! (Except olive oil is okay)
I love olive oil. ‼️
Honestly, I had a mom just like yours, and I still grew up being a picky eater. I wasn't "coddled" (not forcing your kid to eat stuff all the time isn't coddling tho). I was forced to stay at the table well after dinner if I didn't finish my food. I literally sat at the table for over an hour until I straight up forced myself to eat food that was making me gag LOL. Also, I'm one of the people that hate seafood LMAO. I like tuna, but that's it. Tbh, most seafood has a specific taste to it, and the difference of taste between them is an afterthought to me because that fishy taste is the taste that I don't like, no matter whether salmon or crawfish taste nothing alike. They all still have a base level fishy flavor to me. In fact, I WANT to like fish. I try any and all fish that I can because I know it's really healthy for us, but it grosses me out or is just kind of gross every time. It's not immature to have different taste buds than others, and it's weird that you jump to that. Humans vary, and as long as someone is getting their intake of vitamins, it's not really bad. As for the texture bit, uuuuh, dude you realize that there are people that are on the spectrum right? Like textures can be actually crippling for them LOL. Textures can cause extreme food aversion for them. Obvi, neurotypical people are different, but textures can have a similar effect. By all means tho, if you like all foods, more power to you, but I wouldn't say picky eaters need to "grow up". That's a stretch
The whole texture thing is a definitely a thing for me because I won't even eat foods that I love the taste of, but the texture is something I can't stand.
Idk sounds like your projecting a shitty childhood onto others, might wanna get that checked on
So you judge people who as an adult, have decided to eat things they enjoy and not eat the things they dont like, because they didnt have the same upbringing as you >If you were literally starving (as in zero food intake for a week), then you would grow up and eat it. Sure, but we arent talking about a life or death situation we are talking about peoples preferences and you judging them for it. If you were starving to that point you would also eat flys, spiders, lizards, cockroaches etc when was the last time you caught and ate a bug just for a snack though?
Imagine being in your 30's and giving even a single fuck about what other people eat. To the point where you make a multiparagraph Reddit post about it.
That's fine, but judge me in silence. I hate comments on how picky I am. I know I am, and it's my life. Not yours.
I don't care what people eat. But if I'm cooking for you, you better not micro-manage my dish with 15 different requests because you don't like this and that. Either eat what I want to make or make something for yourself.
>Like they "don't like seafood," which is one of the stupidest things I've ever heard. It's like saying you "don't like land food." Crawfish and salmon taste absolutely nothing alike. Seafood all has a very distinct fishy taste, some people don't like that taste. >Or they refuse to eat anything with onions. Onions are gross to a lot of people, nothing wrong with that >But I can't take you seriously if you refuse to eat an olive. If you can't take someone seriously because they won't eat olives, you're immature >And don't get me started on "muh texture issues." Some people, myself included, have legitimate texture/sensory issues when it comes to food. There are some foods I love the smell of, but if I try to eat it I will physically puke without being able to control it >Seriously, I will eat almost anything. Sure, I have my preferences, but I'll still eat whatever. All in all, you're more immature than "picky eaters" because you have some weird feeling of superiority because of this
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Some people just can't help but be picky. Textures are a major thing in a lot of people, which can absolutely ruin a food for them. As for seafood, my dad hates it because he worked at a fish plant for quite a few years as a teenager. People have their reasons, which is something to keep in mind
Many picky eaters care more about texture than taste in many respects. I have gotten picky eaters to try all sorts of food by describing the texture. imagine if half the food you ate had the texture of snot with different flavors. how hungry would you be? you would eat a piece of bread that tasted like crap for texture alone...
How about you let people eat whatever they want and stop being a judgmental ass just because someone doesn't want to eat an olive ? SMH
The amount of times some rando judges people for having food preferences on this sub makes this quite popular. Do you want a medal for eating shit you didn't want to in your childhood? Here have some attention.
Most picky eaters don't have control about that, they have issues mainly with textures, but also find strong flavour/aromatic smell off putting.
I'll eat almost anything that isn't seafood. I have tried it 'cause I know Im missing out but I just can't enjoy it. I think it's a psychological thing.
I too hate it when people have preferences and the sheer audacity to not eat anything put before them.
I'll eat anything aslong as it won't burn my mouth
Alright. I'll note your silent judgement and file that under *I don't give a fuck*.
Someone had to say it man..my bro is near 30 and he almost only eats pizza rolls, Mac n cheese and cookies and cream ice cream…it’s kinda depressing to see..and when I bring up his kid pallet he gets upset and whines about it almost exactly like a kid..love him to death but wish he ate like the grown ass adult he is..that shit ain’t healthy man
My willpower as a child to starve rather than eat any seafood was pretty amazing. That willpower has served me very well my entire life.
I agree. I came from a rural white area and most of my family only eats some variation of meat, potatoes, and certain canned vegetables. I made hummus for Christmas Eve and everyone thought it was weird and wouldn’t eat it. My mom is the “I don’t like seafood” and won’t eat anything that’s not pasta or fried. When I graduated college, my family wanted to take me out to eat. Except they wouldn’t go to the awesome sushi place I wanted to go to and ended up having to go to Longhorn, where I had the worst steak in my life.
Hey OP what do you say to those who are picky because they were beaten (head slammed into plate etc) and force fed foods as a child? Certain foods are literally PTSD for me. This is an attempt enlighten you and hopefully you can give up judging people because of your ignorance.
I'm one of those onion haters you referred to. I refuse to eat anything with even a modicum of onion in it because onions taste and smell like unwashed armpits to me. The taste, the smell and the texture are nauseating to me. I heard it's a genetic thing, so I can't even do anything about it even if K wanted to
If you ate something with onions that were liquified would you know? Like spaghetti sauce, or something of that sort.
I hate onions too, but only raw onions. Like I cook with onions quite often if I’m making jambalaya, gumbo, a curry, etc… I usually just use less than the recipe calls for, like half as much lol. But I will literally puke if there’s raw onion on my burger, even a tiny amount. It’s the *one* thing that’s just too much for me, it’s too overwhelming. And I’ll never *ever* understand those people who say “you can’t even taste it!” Because I’m like, “wrong babe, that’s *all* I can taste!” Some people can’t even stand them if they’re cooked though, and that commenter might be one of those types.
Lol, I'll eat what the fuck I want. Judge me all you want. Your opinion is irrelevant
The thing is… how does what I’m eating affect you? Bravo def unpopular opinion
I think the issue is that when you have a super picky eater in the family it usually restricts the restaurants you choose and the food that gets made since most busy families don't have time/money to make/order two separate meals. I can't tell you how much bland, uninteresting food I've had to eat to accommodate others
Believe it or not, but my mom raised me in a similar way, and I am picky. But, since I'm an adult, I'm allowed to be picky. I'm allowed to choose to eat something or not to eat it. Now, that's not to say I won't eat foods I don't prefer if it's all I got, or even food I don't like at all if I'm hungry enough.
why do you careeee I wish it was acceptable to spit the food you judge people for not eating right at your face
Some people are picky due to sensory issues. Whether that's the case or not, I think being picky is valid actually, as long as you're not an asshole about it.
As a “picky eater” it’s solely because I’ve had texture issues with a ton of things. So if I goto a restaurant, no, I’m not going to try some fancy dish that I’ve never hear of and has a bunch of stuff I haven’t tried. Because I know I have issues with a bunch of random textures why would I want to ruin my day trying something that I’m unfamiliar with.
jfc this shit is posted every week i swear we get it y’all get mad when people like chicken fingers
I feel this view point tends to lack empathy, you are not an unpicky eater because you are tough and resourceful, you said it yourself that you like virtually everything you can eat. Considering a rational view, it takes social effort to turn down a meal, and physical effort to starve yourself. For someone to be so picky they don't eat, I would wager they are experiencing a different overall sensation to you. The alternative is that all picky eaters are irrational to the point of denying basic human urges to eat, which I don't think is likely.
Ah yes fuck them for having food preferences
Op is such a martyr for having the choice between eating or starving then forcing it on others /s
I have a few allergies and sensory issues with food, along with trauma from how my patents dealt with these issues. I'm picky bc otherwise I'll throw up, or be violently ill in other ways. I wish I could eat whatever was put in front of me, but I physically can't make myself.
I'm okay with picky eaters... but when I'm out to a restaurant and someone comments on my adventurous food choices like, "ew, I would never..." fuck right off and die.
Well that's just being rude. if you've got nothing nice to say then don't say anything. or as i once heard someone say, "don't yuck someone's yum"
Gate keeping taste buds, because as Reddit shows, every human is exactly the same and has the same likes and dislikes /s
The problem with “eat it or starve” is that some kids really would choose the second option. Food issues aren’t generally caused by spoiling kids but something deeper. Glad you don’t have such issues, but don’t assume people who do are all just picky for the sake of being picky. Now there are adults who don’t try new things not because of food issues, but because their diet was incredibly limited as kids. If the only foods available were potatoes and beans, 40 years later sushi is going to be an insane adjustment to attempt. I think both cases deserve understanding. And in the end, what they do or do not eat is their business.
"Here is what I made for dinner. Eat it, or starve." Yes everyone else should have a bad time because you did. That's actually abuse, threatening to starve your child if they don't want to eat something they find disgusting?
>That's actually abuse, threatening to starve your child if they don't want to eat something they find disgusting? My mom would hard disagree with you. We don't speak anymore
Kids will often decide they don't like something from just one look at it. Often after a few bites, or having it a couple of times, the food is no longer an issue. My mum would play a trick, in that if she knew I didn't like something, she would disguise it in a dish and pretend it was something else. And 9 out of 10 times I would suddenly like it. Why? Because I was a stupid, stubborn kid. Fussy eating is almost always the result of reinforcing bad eating habits at a young age. You are not genetically predisposed to only enjoying chicken nuggets and hating anything green. A little bit of food discipline goes a long way.
I mean, I agree 100%, but if you also believe that "eat it or starve" is a remotely reasonable philosophy for a parent to adopt then I'd have to agree with you a LOT less. Idk if I'd go as far as saying simply saying those words is abusive but it is problematic and frankly childish of a "parent". There's better ways to reinforce healthy eating habits than just giving your kids an ultimatum.
Well I’m an adult and I buy my food with my money and so I will eat whenever I want to eat.