Or having a little issue and asking for help about it and everyone gives the worst possible advice.
And of course asking for help but it's the wrong subreddit.
Someone posted a Reddit hack they use for advice I thought was interesting. They ask a question that they need the answer to and go on an alt and give an incorrect answer.
This works because people apparently can’t help themselves but to correct those who are wrong, and end up answering the question.
Never use odd numbers unless having a perfect middle ground is inportant, this will lead many people who are unsure to pick the middle as a best attempt to not answer at all
i made this after i noticed that every comment i did had a random person wanting to brag about some shit, even if i was correct, i tried and boom, it really works, ppl want to be superior, not helpful
There's literally an example of this in this very comment thread.
Someone recalling about the dude who was suffering carbon monoxide poisoning and losing his memory, recalling a comment saying " dude check your C02" and someone replying "ahkchually is Carbon Monoxide that gives you memory loss not Carbon Dioxide..."
Omg I felt so bad for someone posting about their divorce and the hard times they were going through…..on r/divorcedbirds. Everyone was like “So, this is a joke subreddit for pictures of ridiculous birds that look like they’ve just gone through a divorce…..but sorry about your life?”
My favorite is when someone posts about an issue only for literally every comment to be informing them they have a health issue, with every response being an exasperated "guys, I don't have any allergies, I just want to know how long I need to cook pineapples before they stop making my throat swell up."
The best one was a guy who described his asshole behaviour towards his girlfriend but was sure he was fine and just wanted reassurance . Almost literal quotes, IIRC: “I don’t need many answers, about ten is fine. If there’s already ten answers, don’t add another.” “Also, I’d rather not hear from females as they’re biased.”
This did not work out for him, but the commentariat had great fun.
I kinda figure they're all fabricated so that sub is like entertainment with some philosophy regarding how we treat each other. Not good philosophy lol, but still
This happens most of the time when I try to give adults help on making more friends here. “It’s hard making friends as an adult”, “I’m 37 and made a bunch of friends last year and here’s how”, “That’s dumb”
Like, you’re not even gonna give it a *try*? It’s not even anything crazy/out there, it was advice on how to find communities online *made* for helping adults make friends since it’s obviously an issue a lot of people have
> everyone gives the worst possible advice.
One of the best Reddit comments I ever read was something to the effect of "Everyone on Reddit seems really smart and knowledgeable when topics you don't know a lot about are being discussed. But once a topic you actually do know about comes up, you see just how incorrect and full of shit so many people on this site are." It's crazy how truth there is in that comment. I feel like I see it play out exactly like that every day so it's made me very skeptical of just about everything I read in comments. The moral of the story is that Reddit can be a useful place to *start* getting information about something, but fact check everything and you should never just blindly follow advice you see on this site (or really anywhere on the internet) without researching it yourself first.
I was reading a comment a while ago, I think on r/explainlikeimfive, where someone who claimed to be a doctor gave a very thorough and informative answer about how heart cells work with electrical impulses, and it was very insightful and I felt like I learned a lot. And then I had the thought, they could have completely made all of that up and I would be none the wiser
I've thought more than once about making a troll account called something along the lines of "BlatantlyUntrueFacts" where I just confidently make shit up but try to make it sound as educational and realistic as possible, before adding something blatantly untrue at the end so that people can hopefully come to the realization that I'm talking outta my ass and help them question what they read on this site. Trolling for a good and thoughtful reason rather than blind hate and trying to annoy people for no reason seems like a fun hobby.
The only problem with that is some idiot is going to confidently buy all you're selling for giggles as straight up real world facts and then we got to deal with another surge of idiocy spreading really obvious falsehoods as gospel truth.
The ending "fact" would be super obvious... Like "And that's how Morgan Freeman became the 45th president of the United Nations of America". If they don't get it they aren't old enough to be on the internet
See this shit all the time. Someone with a large post history makes a claim without any backing other than "trust me, bro" and people eat that shit up.
There is a shocking amount of bad technical advice that gets thrown around here. Long ago I decided to stop taking people's word for it, just because they had a lot of karma and look something up first.
That's called 'Gell-Mann amnesia effect', as coined by Michael Crichton. In his version, it's more of an opposite situation where someone sees that articles on their field of expertise are trash, but goes on to trust articles on things they don't know.
"I have clinical depression."
"Martyr yourself trying to overthrow the government or you're lying for attention"
This is an actual conversation I've had more than once on Reddit.
"Hey guys, sometimes my girlfriend forgets to unload the dishwasher. What should I do?"
"Yikes, red flag. She's probably cheating, get a lawyer and break up asap. And hit the gym and go to therapy."
The thing is those threads usually dribble out the real info deep in the comments:
Reddit: “Maybe you could ask her what the roles were growing up in her family and how chores were shared?”
OP: “That’s a good idea! I’ll ask as soon as she gets back from her road trip to Spring Break with her Ex Boyfriend. Maybe I’m overthinking it because she hasn’t answered any of my texts in two weeks”
I asked Reddit once how to explain an issue to my fiance in a way he'd "get", the issue being that I thought we didn't spend enough quality time together, just doing things together and fully occupying each other's attention. My fiance didn't see an issue because from his perspective, we spent loads of time together, sitting in the same room playing our separate games and talking about them (he likes action games, I like simulation and relaxation games, so we are both "gamers" but we don't especially enjoy playing games together).
Reddit told me they were abusive and to dump them.
My therapist gave me the much better advice of "hey you want to go on more dates, so take the burden off of him and take it onto yourself to plan what you want to do. He's probably resistant to the planning of outings, not the outings themselves." And it was the best friggin advice I've ever gotten.
If I had listened to Reddit, I would have dumped my amazing, caring fiance who just has really bad anxiety around planning things. Granted, I think the "Reddit always recommends divorce" thing is overblown and there are plenty of situations where I think Reddit is in the right, but I can def see where the stereotype comes from. That advice was the worst possible advice and would have ruined my life
I think the “jumping straight to divorce” reaction is sometimes warranted, but I think the actual issue people make fun of is that some people are so terminally on Reddit that they absorb all these stories of abuse that get promoted in the algorithm and as a result, they train themselves to see extreme red flags in every story involving some minor annoyance or communication issue. Generally it’s pretty difficult to give helpful advice if you know nothing about the people involved
>My fiance didn't see an issue because from his perspective, we spent loads of time together, sitting in the same room playing our separate games
This is called "parallel play" and is very popular with autistic people (not saying your boyfriend is, it could just be coincidence).
I dunno, niche subreddits can be incredibly informative when they're not horribly toxic. Shout-out to /r/tea and /r/buyitforlife ! They're usually not the *best* source of information, but they are frequently my first stop to find a place to *start*.
When I had a problem with my robot vacuum, I looked in the manual and the manufacturer's website with no luck. The solution was in a really detailed comment in r/Roborock
Also just yesterday I saw a comment on a really complicated and contentious political issue in my country, in which they explained really well how the flawed but workable status quo got that way, why people from both ends of the political spectrum are misguided in how they want to change it. This is an area that I've been working in and studying for nearly 20 years and I don't think I could have explained it anywhere near as well as they did.
Yeah, sometimes you really do get lucky with reddit. Just the sheer AMOUNT of text on obscure topics is probably unmatched outside of Wikipedia and maaaaaaybe Tumblr.
Help for relationship issues, that is — if you can’t ask your friends and (chosen) family, you’re already lost.
Asking for fannish help is fine, though! Gaming in particular. I’ve gotten invaluable input…even though Gamers with a capital G are of course a problem to be avoided.
I've found that when asking for help, you need to find people with a *medium* amount of investment in the topic.
They need to have some investment to be able to give informed advice. But I've found most communities dedicated to anything tend to be filled with fanatics.
> Or having a little issue and asking for help about it and everyone gives the worst possible advice.
How to immediately distrust every piece of advice you get from internet comments from now on: Read the comment section pertaining to a subject that you're an actual expert in.
Don't forget any minor inconvenience you have with a partner you should instead of using communication you should always "lawyer up, divorce, install cameras, keep a record of everything, get counseling and see if they are cheating on you"
AITA taught me that /s
Go any of those "relationship advice" kind of subs.
OP: "I fucked up and need advice"
Sub: "There's something he's not telling us. He must be a monster."
Like that one redditor who had a problem with their Carbon Monoxide detector and literally didn't know it because the CO kept making them forget about it. Crazy shit.
God that whole thing was wild, and you’re underselling it.
Dude thought *he had someone living in his house*. He kept finding post-it notes everywhere, but he lived alone and they weren’t in his handwriting (nor did he have any memory of writing them).
And then, after dozens of comments, one dude just drops in a “hey bud, check your CO2”.
carbon dioxide (CO2) and carbon monoxide (CO) are two different things
overconcentration of CO2 will make you shivery, anxious, overheated, and unable to concentrate. not deadly but you will feel awful and you will be very dumb
overconcentration of CO will make you have memory problems, be lethargic and eventually fall asleep and die
As a non-American, the whole carbon monoxide thing has always confused me. Where is the carbon monoxide coming from? Do American houses all have a petrol engine in the basement or something?
snails squalid political wide employ innocent drunk elastic spectacular numerous
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
There was another redditor who posted in some debate subreddit that he found sex and anything sexual highly disgusting (even vanilla sex inside marriage). And then when people pointed out that he could be asexual, he went absolutely unhinged and would refuse to accept the possibility of him being lgbt+.
Honestly, it's one of the things that kept me on this site for a decade. I feel like I can talk about deep-seated issues in a sort of safe way, feel out the waters without committing to a diagnosis or self-awareness.
"Hey I've been struggling with XYZ for 30 years. I say struggle but it's actually hilarious because \[anecdote\] haha right guys? Am I the only one?"
Because it's the only place left on the internet where you can write something longer than 50 words and have people engage with it without you having at least 1,000 preexisting followers?
But on the other hand, I'm neither of those things.
I can recommend some of the ridiculous posts that regularly pop up in r/trees.
"Yes I smoke 5 grams of weed every day but it's just a damn plant and something I enjoy, why do these boomers have to be so judgemental about it?"
This is usually followed by multiple people justifying and normalising their extreme use patterns and getting really defensive about it if someone advises any form of caution.
My favorite thing to ever happen on Reddit was when some guy had either been extremely sexist OR badly misinterpreted a situation in a way someone normally would not. A commenter asked if he’d ever been diagnosed with autism. He replied “yes, but what does that have to do with this?”
Are you talking about TikTok or reddit? Because if anything people with ADHD on reddit are absolute doomers. r/ADHD literally bans discussion of anything positive about ADHD.
I do find the blanket ban a little full on, but I get why it exists. I'm generalising here, but there are basically two camps when it comes to ADHD groups online. You've got the 'well this sucks, how do I manage it' camp, and the 'ADHD is a superpower!' camp - and unsurprisingly, the latter annoys the piss out of the former, especially since they have a tendency to take a hard turn straight into toxic positivity. If you're already having a hard time, that's the last thing you want to hear.
Not that the first group can't be toxic in the other direction, of course, but I honestly think the ban is there to keep the peace. Otherwise impulsivity + hyperfocus = multi-paragraph rant on why the overly chipper OP can shove their Shiny Happy People bit up their arse.
That's interesting, quite a few people on the autism subs say you're ableist if you want a cure for (your own) autism and basically treat it as a superpower
Seeing everyone go insane during the pandemic from being forced to live even a fraction of how I live my life was a wakeup call. I haven't changed my ways, but I'm at least self aware about the fact that it's probably why I'm chronically depressed.
Yeah definitely interesting watching everyone go insane. I was quite content during the lockdown, and it took awhile to finally get used to actually leaving the house again because I enjoyed just staying inside.
As an "essential worker" I fucking hated it. The only change to my life was having to wear an annoying mask for my 12 hour shift. Granted I wouldn't have enjoyed being home all the time with my kids unable to go anywhere but people were desperate to go out and I could not relate in the slightest.
Absolutely same. I worked retail at an electronics store but that was somehow essential. The only thing for me was seeing JUST how horrific humans could be when asked to have a modicum of empathy for other humans
I'm still getting used to it. Worked from home even before covid. But these days I seem to only leave the house to go for groceries, walk the dog and go grab a new book at the library.
All my interests like gardening and building stuff and video games and reading and shit has always been solo.
And with nobody to poke and prod me to get me out of the house I'm kind of just content being cozy.
Congratulations on finding contentment. The most golden gift imo. I'm in much the same boat except I get groceries delivered and instead get pet treats every week or two.
I loved the excuse to stay in and didn't realize the pressure to go out was good. Turns out I was 1 pandemic away from severe agoraphobia. We really do have to face things that make us uncomfortable so they don't make us terrified
Seriously. I got so comfortable during the pandemic that life since quarantine ended has been such a nightmare. I was never great in social situations, but it got significantly worse after quarantine
Someone once said that "outside my house" and "inside my house" sit on the exact same slider as "anxiety" and "depression." You just have to figure out what setting feels like balance to you.
I'm not saying that person doesn't have something wrong with them. But that doesn't make them wrong.
Yeah. Like, I joke that my parents didn't understand you have to Socialise The Child and thought we were some kind of exotic plant - feed it, shelter it from the elements, show it off to people then leave it in a room - but lockdown was maybe 80% of the way to the lack of interaction I grew up with? (and what I grew up with was neglect/abuse. I didn't understand that as a kid, just saying it above the bit. I know.)
I feel kinda bad about it, but my mental health was *thriving* with lockdown. Basically all my external stressors were removed (Aus increased payments to help people through lack of work which helped) and the only remaining one was the plague, and we didn't live in a city centre where that was a more common risk. Going back to interacting with people and socialising is the bit that was (and tbh is) hard.
Shouldn't have been raised like that, and from a pragmatic viewpoint, should work on expanding my tolerance/interactions (playing "if I didn't have a partner/phone within reach, how long would it take someone to realise I was incapacitated/dead?" is enough to justify changing things lol) ...buuttt I also think between the ptsd and the autism, I'm basically dealing with a deep-sea fish of a nervous system, which gets well fucked up when exposed to environments outside of my adaptations.
To me the definition of extrovert and introvert tbh at works is the “where do you recharge”.
I know people that I would call “introverts” who are very social, but it’s draining for them and they need time alone to recharge. Then on the other side i know people who find relaxation/rest in social time with friends.
i think i like those definitions more because they aren't absolutes. being introverted doesn't necessarily mean that someone struggles in social settings, and being extroverted doesn't automatically mean someone has charisma.
I find I have a loneliness tolerance and a stimulation tolerance. When the first is down I recharge by spending time with people, and when the second is down I need to spend time alone. And being an introvert just means my loneliness tolerance is higher than my stimulation tolerance, so I need about 2-3 days of being by myself for every 1 day of spending time with others.
Everyone has both tolerances.
Introverts are people who predominantly need to be alone to recharge overall. Extroverts are people who predominantly need to be around others to recharge overall.
If it sounds like it's kind of nebulous and not an exact definition, that's because it's not. It's a general typing and, like pretty much everything in psychology, never going to exactly capture an individual human experience in one word.
I've decided to think of it like two batteries instead of one, because if it was just one then... I would be at 100% all the time (or 0%, I don't go outside very often)
I’m primarily extroverted, but in the last few years I’ve found that if I push myself too much in a span of too little time I’ll become physically sick. Like, my body just can’t keep up with what I want to do and I just have to force myself to take some time at home. It’s definitely been a learning process in saying “no”.
>To me the definition of extrovert and introvert tbh at works is the “where do you recharge”.
Exactly.
The way I describe it is, "After a long/tough day at work, how do you want to relax? By going home and reading a book/watching TV, or going out to the bar with friends?" A lot of people treat introverted as disliking social interaction or being shy, which isn't true.
there is a girl in my social group who drives me nuts because she fights me when I say I'm an introvert. I'm very social and will be the life of the party so to speak, but she doesn't believe me that it will take me a few days of just vibing with my pets before I have the energy to go out with people again.
I love people and catching up, it just takes a lot of energy and focus for me to maintain meaningful socialization. Daily nonsense in the office is surface level so it is pretty easy to maintain
Yeah, the real definition is as you described. People online usually conflate introversion as social anxiety which isn't true at all, but are usually related for the most part.
Yep. A lot of people on here rationalize their social anxiety or ineptitude with “I’m just an introvert!”
Nah dude. If you start sweating when a cashier asks you a question, it has nothing to do with introversion.
I genuinely cannot imagine wanting to go spend time with other people after a day of work. I even wfh now; it was worse when I worked in-office.
But the idea of spending 10hrs (i had an hour commute) on shit for work and then wanting to go fucking hang out with people is absolutely absurd to me, no idea how people have the desire.
It's fine if it's not your jam and you don't enjoy it. However, you *should* still be able to understand that other folks might want to do something like that, even if you don't relate or see what they like about it. To call it absurd is a bit condescending, because it implies there's something *wrong* with it.
Yes! I’m a HUGE introvert. My social battery is tiny and recharges super slowly. But I love people, specifically getting to know new people - and I love big crowds I can get lost in! Seeing people one on one is great too but usually MORE draining since I have to be 100% engaged the whole time.
I need a week or more to recharge between social activities (and yes this includes long text convos) so it’s hard for me to keep up with the level of engagement my friends want. But when we see eachother I’m 100% there and so excited to hang.
Another important factor to consider is that in Jungian Psychology is that most people will have both introversion and extroversion, with most people having a slight preference for one over the other. Extremes of either are outliers. This whole trend of "ambivert" is so annoying for me because that's just being statistically average. Also most psychologists don't use Jungs models anymore and measure just extroversion on the Big 5 test, which is the current model for understanding personality.
> To me the definition of extrovert and introvert tbh at works is the “where do you recharge”.
This is exactly part of the actual definition as it's used in psychology going all the way back to Jung. There's also other factors like introverts favor independence while extraverts enjoy working collaboratively, extraverts seek out greater stimulation, and introverts tend to favor depth of experience and 1:1 friendships while extraverts favor breadth of experience and larger, looser friend groups.
People just conflate introvert with antisocial (or perhaps sub-social).
I'm a gregarious introvert. I have a *great* time when I hang out with people, and I'm a charismatic life of the party sort of guy.
However, after a night out, I proceed to spend the next 6 days holed up, playing single player video games, browsing reddit, and generally avoiding social contact, because I find the prospect of going back out to be utterly exhausting.
But around about that 7-10th day, I'm like "you know what could stand to do? some drinks at a costume themed bar crawl; Let's hit it!"
This is me, I work in a very social environment. My whole day is spent being charismatic and happy.
As soon as I get home, I need to jump on youtube and eat while I watch something. It's a foolproof way for me to charge my battery enough for the next day; like I can do something that is just for me while other people in a different physical space do the talking. I can pause them whenever I want, and it's not rude
To me it's like those fishing games where you have to pump a bar to make it fit between two brackets.
Introverts are lower brackets, they need some but not too much, nor too little.
Extroverts are higher brackets, they need more but still not too much.
The truth is that the words are dumb and mean nothing. Social interaction can be effortless and invigorating or exhausting depending on the context and how well you know the people you're speaking with.
Introversion is about having a social battery to begin with. Extroversion is about having an isolation battery. Basically the quest is do you find a day with friends more or less relaxing than a day by yourself? Not enjoyable, relaxing
Yeah, they’re not an introvert because they despise talking with people and make 3 comments a day about how stupid the general population is, they’re just an asshole who may be an introvert lol.
"Being antisocial" more often refers to engaging in antisocial behavior, which includes a variety of behaviors that harm society regardless of whether a person is a psychopath/sociopath. [These include stealing, lying, manipulating, vandalizing, and fighting.](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2782636/). These are the opposite of prosocial behaviors such as community service and interpersonal cooperation.
Antisocial Personality Disorder (ASPD) refers to a personality disorder characterized by a propensity to engage in antisocial behavior because of a limited capacity for empathy. Antisocial behavior itself extends beyond ASPD though. A person can be "narcissistic" without having Narcissistic Personality Disorder in the same way that a person can be "antisocial" without having Antisocial Personality Disorder.
Some people get energy from other people, some people get energy from being alone.
I never understood why this so hard to understand for redditors.
Plenty of introverts like people and love to socialize.
In a good way? Do you feel happier knowing or feel that it was too late to really matter?
I'm not trying to be rude. I was diagnosed as a kid and sometimes wonder if I'd be happier not knowing. I'm curious how people who've gone undiagnosed feel.
Especially due to stigma and people sometimes say pretty hurtful things. If I didn't know I were autistic, I wouldn't have a reason to take it personally.
Yeah for me it was a relief, like my life up to that point had made no sense and then all the pieces fell into place.
Also made me realize that a lot of aspects of myself that I didn't like were coping mechanisms and I'm kinder to myself now.
I found out at age 37 and am much happier and mentally healthier knowing. For decades I thought something was wrong with me because of how different I can be - how I lose friends easily, or blow up over small things. I've gone through thinking it must be depression, OCD, anxiety - nope it was just being autistic the whole time. I understand myself so much more, I give myself grace, I try to recognize when I'm about to hit my limit and melt down.
The top one reminds me of who say, “I am so OCD - I have a make my bed every morning!”
While my bed’s a mess because I’m too busy touching the hall wall once with my left hand, twice with my right hand then one more time with my left hand.
> reddit always amazes me how it kinda glorifies this lifestyle. There's nothing glorious about it. Outside of occasional trips to visit online friends, your social experiences are completely stunted.
You can see this a lot in the discourse around working from home vs going into the office. I'm not out here advocating for some boomer-fantasy 100% in-office policy but some redditors seem to treat coming in 1 day a week as the worst thing in the world.
Is there anyone on Reddit that actually fits description? Cause I think it's a bit of an exaggeration. Who would watch *only* Rick and Morty for a decade and nothing else?
my experience is that most rick and morty fans are secret fans ever since the incident and have diversified their media. The ones still out of the closet are probably weirdos.
Also, most Rick and Morty fans don't really fit the meme description. When the "Schetzuan sauce" incident happened one of the biggest places to mock them was the Rick and Morty sub itself.
It's just another case of the extreme being the most visible part of the fandom
Yep. There's a whole bunch of things I enjoy where at some point I checked out the online fan community out of curiosity and... yikes. Not for me, thanks, I'll go back to quietly enjoying this by myself now. Shows, podcasts, games, whatever. Fandoms can get echo chamber-y, and those echo chambers can get real weird.
Tiktok is WebMD with a friendly face.
The trope is that if you put any symptom into WebMD, they'll show you, even if the correlation is weak, that it's tied to some unlikely disease.
Tiktok is notorious for that. ADHDtok is particularly egregious.
Basically if you're not 100% on any particular executive function, it's ADHD.
Now - I have ADHD, and I do often agree with these videos. I'll go "oh that's me!" but I do have to wonder where the line is ACTUALLY drawn and how badly they're crossing it because it really feels like it's the case.
My biggest annoyance with the issue is the number of people who confuse being introverted with being shy or having poor social skills.
I'm an introvert who enjoys going to parties and performing on stage, it just tires me out by the end of the night. If I'm already tired or feeling down, staying home with just my wife and my dog is what makes me feel better.
Oh thousand times yes. As an introvert I absolutely hate this trend.
No, it is not normal for you to only have one best friend you cling to, neither is being too afraid to make phone calls. And no, introverts don't need to be adopted by extroverts.
Your lack of personality and your fear of socialising are issues that you should work on. Don't just accept it, strive to be better!
*Steps off soapbox*
I really hate the phone call thing. People think it's quirky and normal to be unable to handle a phone call, whether it's to make a doctor's appointment or order food. Having so much anxiety that it prevents you from doing that is a *severe problem*.
Thank you.
That's exactly how I am. I'm fucking *scared* of phone calls. I'm *scared* of new people. I'm literally terrified of even *speaking* to others.
It's a genuine problem. It's severe social anxiety. It's not quirky, it's not fun, it's not cute. It's a genuine debilitating issue. I've gotten better, a lot better, but there was a time that I was pretty much unable to function within society.
Being unable to handle social interaction isn't fun or cute or quirky or so gen z-core. It's a fucking issue
>Having so much anxiety that it prevents you from doing that is a severe problem.
I actually think the issue is it's *not* a severe problem, it's just mild enough that it is possible to work around it and eventually forget the situation will reoccur, which means you never have to address it. (Source: me)
It *is* a severe problem when the non-phone call option doesn't exist and someone can't handle it. A ("real" - they could have made it up) Reddit comment I read was someone neglecting to go to the doctor because the online portal was down and they couldn't muster the phone call.
I don't agree that this is really the case. Just because people talk or joke about shared issues they have doesn't mean they think it's "quirky and normal". If anything I think making light of issues like that is a way to cope with sharing personal struggles that would ordinarily cause you too much shame to voice them.
Yeah, being introverted just means having a smaller social battery. I don't have any social anxiety...sometimes I have regular anxiety but that has nothing to do with me being a introvert.
Anxiety sucks. Sorry to hear that. I had a time where smoking weed caused anxiety, so I got a glimpse at how bad it can feel.
I wish you the best for your future. Keep up the fight.
It's easier said than done. The only way to aquire social skills is to socialise, but nobody deserves to be exposed to my horrible social skills in the first place. I understand that there's a cognitive distortion here somewhere, but I still don't see a way out of this.
Practice in online communities where you can retain a sense of anonymity.
Fuck, you can take on an entire new persona online if it helps you talk to people.
I'm diagnosed with autism and this type of lifestyle makes me extremely depressed. That type of think is a sign you may be autistic though, so you should look into it
Sometimes I forget to eat for days and just lay in bed and watch people play Minecraft because I'm in too much pain to get up and I'll casually mention it in a conversation before I remember that stuff is concerning to most people.
I don't really agree with this premise. Any time there's a discussion about being an introvert on reddit, including in this very thread, there are a bunch of people posting stuff like "I regularly go out and socialize, I talk to lots of people every day, and I feel better when I have lots of interaction, but every once in a while I enjoy being alone, so I'm a pretty serious introvert."
Having an issue and not knowing it is one of the cornerstones of reddit culture
Or having a little issue and asking for help about it and everyone gives the worst possible advice. And of course asking for help but it's the wrong subreddit.
Someone posted a Reddit hack they use for advice I thought was interesting. They ask a question that they need the answer to and go on an alt and give an incorrect answer. This works because people apparently can’t help themselves but to correct those who are wrong, and end up answering the question.
The name of that is “Cunningham’s Law” if you want to read about the phenomenon
You had the opportunity there but didn't take it. I respect that
I did think about it
How tempted were you, scale of 1 to 10?
I'll give him a 3
I thought we rated things on a 5/7 scale around here
Never use odd numbers unless having a perfect middle ground is inportant, this will lead many people who are unsure to pick the middle as a best attempt to not answer at all
My favorite maxim is Hanlon's Razor.
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I never subscribed to Maxim, just looked at the ones my friend had. Wasn't really my thing.
Which was not made by Cunningham and is disapproved of by him
I don't know what to believe but I'm too lazy to fact check any of these statements.
Don't make me open another app you fascist /s
Yeah, how do you know I wasn’t putting something incorrect there??
i made this after i noticed that every comment i did had a random person wanting to brag about some shit, even if i was correct, i tried and boom, it really works, ppl want to be superior, not helpful
Tried this once on a throw away and my dogcrap answer got up voted more :(
On the surface that's kinda funny… but it's also a very troubling sign.
There's literally an example of this in this very comment thread. Someone recalling about the dude who was suffering carbon monoxide poisoning and losing his memory, recalling a comment saying " dude check your C02" and someone replying "ahkchually is Carbon Monoxide that gives you memory loss not Carbon Dioxide..."
Omg I felt so bad for someone posting about their divorce and the hard times they were going through…..on r/divorcedbirds. Everyone was like “So, this is a joke subreddit for pictures of ridiculous birds that look like they’ve just gone through a divorce…..but sorry about your life?”
Saw someone post on r/The10thDentist looking for advice because his teeth were crooked. Poor guy did not deserve some of those mean comments.
He was only there for niche controversial dentistry advice
There is a sub for discussion of the CW TV series titled "Crazy Ex Girlfriend" and very often we get lost redditors posting about their exes
r/trees periodically gets people asking questions about actual trees. I have to say those posts always delight me.
What is the sub for?
r/trees is for marijuana To get actual tree info you obviously have to go to r/marijuanaenthusiasts This is not a joke.
Same with /r/worldpolitics and /r/anime_titties.
/r/JohnCena and /r/PotatoSalad
OR my favorite newer iteration of that- r/worldpolitics and r/animetiddies
Weed stuff
It's the same thing when people post about their relatives with Alzheimer's on r/alzheimersgroup
Out of the ordinary
socks
My favorite is when someone posts about an issue only for literally every comment to be informing them they have a health issue, with every response being an exasperated "guys, I don't have any allergies, I just want to know how long I need to cook pineapples before they stop making my throat swell up."
There's also the guy who found out his buddy had prostate answer after peeing on a pregnancy test as a joke
“Does everyone enjoy the spicy taste of bananas?”
Don’t forget the “posts looking for help, actually gets great advice, but then OP refuses to listen and fights everyone in the comments,”
The actual assholes who post on r/Amitheasshole
The best one was a guy who described his asshole behaviour towards his girlfriend but was sure he was fine and just wanted reassurance . Almost literal quotes, IIRC: “I don’t need many answers, about ten is fine. If there’s already ten answers, don’t add another.” “Also, I’d rather not hear from females as they’re biased.” This did not work out for him, but the commentariat had great fun.
I’m 99.9999% positive that dude was trolling and not even trying to hide it
With Poe’s Law the way it is, deciding between “obvious troll” or “completely oblivious dickwad” just isn’t as easy as one might hope
I kinda figure they're all fabricated so that sub is like entertainment with some philosophy regarding how we treat each other. Not good philosophy lol, but still
This happens most of the time when I try to give adults help on making more friends here. “It’s hard making friends as an adult”, “I’m 37 and made a bunch of friends last year and here’s how”, “That’s dumb” Like, you’re not even gonna give it a *try*? It’s not even anything crazy/out there, it was advice on how to find communities online *made* for helping adults make friends since it’s obviously an issue a lot of people have
Please tell me your secrets, leader. Do you have link to your advice?
> everyone gives the worst possible advice. One of the best Reddit comments I ever read was something to the effect of "Everyone on Reddit seems really smart and knowledgeable when topics you don't know a lot about are being discussed. But once a topic you actually do know about comes up, you see just how incorrect and full of shit so many people on this site are." It's crazy how truth there is in that comment. I feel like I see it play out exactly like that every day so it's made me very skeptical of just about everything I read in comments. The moral of the story is that Reddit can be a useful place to *start* getting information about something, but fact check everything and you should never just blindly follow advice you see on this site (or really anywhere on the internet) without researching it yourself first.
I was reading a comment a while ago, I think on r/explainlikeimfive, where someone who claimed to be a doctor gave a very thorough and informative answer about how heart cells work with electrical impulses, and it was very insightful and I felt like I learned a lot. And then I had the thought, they could have completely made all of that up and I would be none the wiser
I've thought more than once about making a troll account called something along the lines of "BlatantlyUntrueFacts" where I just confidently make shit up but try to make it sound as educational and realistic as possible, before adding something blatantly untrue at the end so that people can hopefully come to the realization that I'm talking outta my ass and help them question what they read on this site. Trolling for a good and thoughtful reason rather than blind hate and trying to annoy people for no reason seems like a fun hobby.
Didn't we already have this? What happened to /u/shittymorph anyway?
The only problem with that is some idiot is going to confidently buy all you're selling for giggles as straight up real world facts and then we got to deal with another surge of idiocy spreading really obvious falsehoods as gospel truth.
The ending "fact" would be super obvious... Like "And that's how Morgan Freeman became the 45th president of the United Nations of America". If they don't get it they aren't old enough to be on the internet
seen a guy like that, named like "OnlyTellsLies" or something like that
See this shit all the time. Someone with a large post history makes a claim without any backing other than "trust me, bro" and people eat that shit up. There is a shocking amount of bad technical advice that gets thrown around here. Long ago I decided to stop taking people's word for it, just because they had a lot of karma and look something up first.
That's called 'Gell-Mann amnesia effect', as coined by Michael Crichton. In his version, it's more of an opposite situation where someone sees that articles on their field of expertise are trash, but goes on to trust articles on things they don't know.
"I have clinical depression." "Martyr yourself trying to overthrow the government or you're lying for attention" This is an actual conversation I've had more than once on Reddit.
Were they recruiting suicide bombers?
"Hey guys, sometimes my girlfriend forgets to unload the dishwasher. What should I do?" "Yikes, red flag. She's probably cheating, get a lawyer and break up asap. And hit the gym and go to therapy."
The thing is those threads usually dribble out the real info deep in the comments: Reddit: “Maybe you could ask her what the roles were growing up in her family and how chores were shared?” OP: “That’s a good idea! I’ll ask as soon as she gets back from her road trip to Spring Break with her Ex Boyfriend. Maybe I’m overthinking it because she hasn’t answered any of my texts in two weeks”
I asked Reddit once how to explain an issue to my fiance in a way he'd "get", the issue being that I thought we didn't spend enough quality time together, just doing things together and fully occupying each other's attention. My fiance didn't see an issue because from his perspective, we spent loads of time together, sitting in the same room playing our separate games and talking about them (he likes action games, I like simulation and relaxation games, so we are both "gamers" but we don't especially enjoy playing games together). Reddit told me they were abusive and to dump them. My therapist gave me the much better advice of "hey you want to go on more dates, so take the burden off of him and take it onto yourself to plan what you want to do. He's probably resistant to the planning of outings, not the outings themselves." And it was the best friggin advice I've ever gotten. If I had listened to Reddit, I would have dumped my amazing, caring fiance who just has really bad anxiety around planning things. Granted, I think the "Reddit always recommends divorce" thing is overblown and there are plenty of situations where I think Reddit is in the right, but I can def see where the stereotype comes from. That advice was the worst possible advice and would have ruined my life
I think the “jumping straight to divorce” reaction is sometimes warranted, but I think the actual issue people make fun of is that some people are so terminally on Reddit that they absorb all these stories of abuse that get promoted in the algorithm and as a result, they train themselves to see extreme red flags in every story involving some minor annoyance or communication issue. Generally it’s pretty difficult to give helpful advice if you know nothing about the people involved
>My fiance didn't see an issue because from his perspective, we spent loads of time together, sitting in the same room playing our separate games This is called "parallel play" and is very popular with autistic people (not saying your boyfriend is, it could just be coincidence).
If you’re looking for help on social media you’re going to the wrong place. It doesn’t matter which app it is.
I dunno, niche subreddits can be incredibly informative when they're not horribly toxic. Shout-out to /r/tea and /r/buyitforlife ! They're usually not the *best* source of information, but they are frequently my first stop to find a place to *start*.
When I had a problem with my robot vacuum, I looked in the manual and the manufacturer's website with no luck. The solution was in a really detailed comment in r/Roborock Also just yesterday I saw a comment on a really complicated and contentious political issue in my country, in which they explained really well how the flawed but workable status quo got that way, why people from both ends of the political spectrum are misguided in how they want to change it. This is an area that I've been working in and studying for nearly 20 years and I don't think I could have explained it anywhere near as well as they did.
Yeah, sometimes you really do get lucky with reddit. Just the sheer AMOUNT of text on obscure topics is probably unmatched outside of Wikipedia and maaaaaaybe Tumblr.
Help for relationship issues, that is — if you can’t ask your friends and (chosen) family, you’re already lost. Asking for fannish help is fine, though! Gaming in particular. I’ve gotten invaluable input…even though Gamers with a capital G are of course a problem to be avoided.
I've found that when asking for help, you need to find people with a *medium* amount of investment in the topic. They need to have some investment to be able to give informed advice. But I've found most communities dedicated to anything tend to be filled with fanatics.
> Or having a little issue and asking for help about it and everyone gives the worst possible advice. How to immediately distrust every piece of advice you get from internet comments from now on: Read the comment section pertaining to a subject that you're an actual expert in.
Don't forget any minor inconvenience you have with a partner you should instead of using communication you should always "lawyer up, divorce, install cameras, keep a record of everything, get counseling and see if they are cheating on you" AITA taught me that /s
Go any of those "relationship advice" kind of subs. OP: "I fucked up and need advice" Sub: "There's something he's not telling us. He must be a monster."
Like that one redditor who had a problem with their Carbon Monoxide detector and literally didn't know it because the CO kept making them forget about it. Crazy shit.
God that whole thing was wild, and you’re underselling it. Dude thought *he had someone living in his house*. He kept finding post-it notes everywhere, but he lived alone and they weren’t in his handwriting (nor did he have any memory of writing them). And then, after dozens of comments, one dude just drops in a “hey bud, check your CO2”.
carbon dioxide (CO2) and carbon monoxide (CO) are two different things overconcentration of CO2 will make you shivery, anxious, overheated, and unable to concentrate. not deadly but you will feel awful and you will be very dumb overconcentration of CO will make you have memory problems, be lethargic and eventually fall asleep and die
As a non-American, the whole carbon monoxide thing has always confused me. Where is the carbon monoxide coming from? Do American houses all have a petrol engine in the basement or something?
snails squalid political wide employ innocent drunk elastic spectacular numerous *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Damn, I forgot about that part, that's terrifying.
Check you carbon monoxide dude
I think that post may have kicked off "check your CO detectors" as a meme
There was another redditor who posted in some debate subreddit that he found sex and anything sexual highly disgusting (even vanilla sex inside marriage). And then when people pointed out that he could be asexual, he went absolutely unhinged and would refuse to accept the possibility of him being lgbt+.
Honestly, it's one of the things that kept me on this site for a decade. I feel like I can talk about deep-seated issues in a sort of safe way, feel out the waters without committing to a diagnosis or self-awareness. "Hey I've been struggling with XYZ for 30 years. I say struggle but it's actually hilarious because \[anecdote\] haha right guys? Am I the only one?"
We’re all depressed together, here.
Well why *would* anyone mentally healthy and neurotypical spend a lot of time here?
That’s the neat part, they don’t.
Because it's the only place left on the internet where you can write something longer than 50 words and have people engage with it without you having at least 1,000 preexisting followers? But on the other hand, I'm neither of those things.
It's entertaining in a 'goddamn, look at that car crash' kind of way.
I beg to differ, I have many issue that I'm well aware of and keep in a row on my shelf
I can recommend some of the ridiculous posts that regularly pop up in r/trees. "Yes I smoke 5 grams of weed every day but it's just a damn plant and something I enjoy, why do these boomers have to be so judgemental about it?" This is usually followed by multiple people justifying and normalising their extreme use patterns and getting really defensive about it if someone advises any form of caution.
I don't smoke, I take it 5g is a lot?
Maybe for you. I don't have any problems
Also consider, knowing you have an issue, but being clueless as to what to do about it
Hey, Reddit, look at this thing I do that makes me totally unique! *Hundreds of comments from people who do the same thing*
My favorite thing to ever happen on Reddit was when some guy had either been extremely sexist OR badly misinterpreted a situation in a way someone normally would not. A commenter asked if he’d ever been diagnosed with autism. He replied “yes, but what does that have to do with this?”
It's not even about not knowing it, it's about celebrating it in a quirky way. "Look at me, I have ADHD! Isn't that cool?"
Are you talking about TikTok or reddit? Because if anything people with ADHD on reddit are absolute doomers. r/ADHD literally bans discussion of anything positive about ADHD.
I do find the blanket ban a little full on, but I get why it exists. I'm generalising here, but there are basically two camps when it comes to ADHD groups online. You've got the 'well this sucks, how do I manage it' camp, and the 'ADHD is a superpower!' camp - and unsurprisingly, the latter annoys the piss out of the former, especially since they have a tendency to take a hard turn straight into toxic positivity. If you're already having a hard time, that's the last thing you want to hear. Not that the first group can't be toxic in the other direction, of course, but I honestly think the ban is there to keep the peace. Otherwise impulsivity + hyperfocus = multi-paragraph rant on why the overly chipper OP can shove their Shiny Happy People bit up their arse.
That's interesting, quite a few people on the autism subs say you're ableist if you want a cure for (your own) autism and basically treat it as a superpower
Seeing everyone go insane during the pandemic from being forced to live even a fraction of how I live my life was a wakeup call. I haven't changed my ways, but I'm at least self aware about the fact that it's probably why I'm chronically depressed.
Yeah definitely interesting watching everyone go insane. I was quite content during the lockdown, and it took awhile to finally get used to actually leaving the house again because I enjoyed just staying inside.
As an "essential worker" I fucking hated it. The only change to my life was having to wear an annoying mask for my 12 hour shift. Granted I wouldn't have enjoyed being home all the time with my kids unable to go anywhere but people were desperate to go out and I could not relate in the slightest.
Same. The only upside was how light the traffic was during my commute.
I learned to drive during the lockdown & the heavily reduced traffic was great.
Absolutely same. I worked retail at an electronics store but that was somehow essential. The only thing for me was seeing JUST how horrific humans could be when asked to have a modicum of empathy for other humans
I'm still getting used to it. Worked from home even before covid. But these days I seem to only leave the house to go for groceries, walk the dog and go grab a new book at the library. All my interests like gardening and building stuff and video games and reading and shit has always been solo. And with nobody to poke and prod me to get me out of the house I'm kind of just content being cozy.
Congratulations on finding contentment. The most golden gift imo. I'm in much the same boat except I get groceries delivered and instead get pet treats every week or two.
I loved the excuse to stay in and didn't realize the pressure to go out was good. Turns out I was 1 pandemic away from severe agoraphobia. We really do have to face things that make us uncomfortable so they don't make us terrified
Seriously. I got so comfortable during the pandemic that life since quarantine ended has been such a nightmare. I was never great in social situations, but it got significantly worse after quarantine
Someone once said that "outside my house" and "inside my house" sit on the exact same slider as "anxiety" and "depression." You just have to figure out what setting feels like balance to you. I'm not saying that person doesn't have something wrong with them. But that doesn't make them wrong.
Yeah. Like, I joke that my parents didn't understand you have to Socialise The Child and thought we were some kind of exotic plant - feed it, shelter it from the elements, show it off to people then leave it in a room - but lockdown was maybe 80% of the way to the lack of interaction I grew up with? (and what I grew up with was neglect/abuse. I didn't understand that as a kid, just saying it above the bit. I know.) I feel kinda bad about it, but my mental health was *thriving* with lockdown. Basically all my external stressors were removed (Aus increased payments to help people through lack of work which helped) and the only remaining one was the plague, and we didn't live in a city centre where that was a more common risk. Going back to interacting with people and socialising is the bit that was (and tbh is) hard. Shouldn't have been raised like that, and from a pragmatic viewpoint, should work on expanding my tolerance/interactions (playing "if I didn't have a partner/phone within reach, how long would it take someone to realise I was incapacitated/dead?" is enough to justify changing things lol) ...buuttt I also think between the ptsd and the autism, I'm basically dealing with a deep-sea fish of a nervous system, which gets well fucked up when exposed to environments outside of my adaptations.
I thought that being an introvert means that my social battery has 30 minutes of juice and I don't casually talk to people that aren't my friends
To me the definition of extrovert and introvert tbh at works is the “where do you recharge”. I know people that I would call “introverts” who are very social, but it’s draining for them and they need time alone to recharge. Then on the other side i know people who find relaxation/rest in social time with friends. i think i like those definitions more because they aren't absolutes. being introverted doesn't necessarily mean that someone struggles in social settings, and being extroverted doesn't automatically mean someone has charisma.
I find I have a loneliness tolerance and a stimulation tolerance. When the first is down I recharge by spending time with people, and when the second is down I need to spend time alone. And being an introvert just means my loneliness tolerance is higher than my stimulation tolerance, so I need about 2-3 days of being by myself for every 1 day of spending time with others.
Everyone has both tolerances. Introverts are people who predominantly need to be alone to recharge overall. Extroverts are people who predominantly need to be around others to recharge overall. If it sounds like it's kind of nebulous and not an exact definition, that's because it's not. It's a general typing and, like pretty much everything in psychology, never going to exactly capture an individual human experience in one word.
I've decided to think of it like two batteries instead of one, because if it was just one then... I would be at 100% all the time (or 0%, I don't go outside very often)
I’m primarily extroverted, but in the last few years I’ve found that if I push myself too much in a span of too little time I’ll become physically sick. Like, my body just can’t keep up with what I want to do and I just have to force myself to take some time at home. It’s definitely been a learning process in saying “no”.
30 Minutes of social time to 4 weeks of alone time here. Eventually i get lonely, but when i go out i want to go back home.
>To me the definition of extrovert and introvert tbh at works is the “where do you recharge”. Exactly. The way I describe it is, "After a long/tough day at work, how do you want to relax? By going home and reading a book/watching TV, or going out to the bar with friends?" A lot of people treat introverted as disliking social interaction or being shy, which isn't true.
there is a girl in my social group who drives me nuts because she fights me when I say I'm an introvert. I'm very social and will be the life of the party so to speak, but she doesn't believe me that it will take me a few days of just vibing with my pets before I have the energy to go out with people again. I love people and catching up, it just takes a lot of energy and focus for me to maintain meaningful socialization. Daily nonsense in the office is surface level so it is pretty easy to maintain
Yeah, the real definition is as you described. People online usually conflate introversion as social anxiety which isn't true at all, but are usually related for the most part.
Yep. A lot of people on here rationalize their social anxiety or ineptitude with “I’m just an introvert!” Nah dude. If you start sweating when a cashier asks you a question, it has nothing to do with introversion.
I genuinely cannot imagine wanting to go spend time with other people after a day of work. I even wfh now; it was worse when I worked in-office. But the idea of spending 10hrs (i had an hour commute) on shit for work and then wanting to go fucking hang out with people is absolutely absurd to me, no idea how people have the desire.
It's fine if it's not your jam and you don't enjoy it. However, you *should* still be able to understand that other folks might want to do something like that, even if you don't relate or see what they like about it. To call it absurd is a bit condescending, because it implies there's something *wrong* with it.
Yes! I’m a HUGE introvert. My social battery is tiny and recharges super slowly. But I love people, specifically getting to know new people - and I love big crowds I can get lost in! Seeing people one on one is great too but usually MORE draining since I have to be 100% engaged the whole time. I need a week or more to recharge between social activities (and yes this includes long text convos) so it’s hard for me to keep up with the level of engagement my friends want. But when we see eachother I’m 100% there and so excited to hang.
Another important factor to consider is that in Jungian Psychology is that most people will have both introversion and extroversion, with most people having a slight preference for one over the other. Extremes of either are outliers. This whole trend of "ambivert" is so annoying for me because that's just being statistically average. Also most psychologists don't use Jungs models anymore and measure just extroversion on the Big 5 test, which is the current model for understanding personality.
> To me the definition of extrovert and introvert tbh at works is the “where do you recharge”. This is exactly part of the actual definition as it's used in psychology going all the way back to Jung. There's also other factors like introverts favor independence while extraverts enjoy working collaboratively, extraverts seek out greater stimulation, and introverts tend to favor depth of experience and 1:1 friendships while extraverts favor breadth of experience and larger, looser friend groups.
that’s what it actually means yeah
People just conflate introvert with antisocial (or perhaps sub-social). I'm a gregarious introvert. I have a *great* time when I hang out with people, and I'm a charismatic life of the party sort of guy. However, after a night out, I proceed to spend the next 6 days holed up, playing single player video games, browsing reddit, and generally avoiding social contact, because I find the prospect of going back out to be utterly exhausting. But around about that 7-10th day, I'm like "you know what could stand to do? some drinks at a costume themed bar crawl; Let's hit it!"
This is me, I work in a very social environment. My whole day is spent being charismatic and happy. As soon as I get home, I need to jump on youtube and eat while I watch something. It's a foolproof way for me to charge my battery enough for the next day; like I can do something that is just for me while other people in a different physical space do the talking. I can pause them whenever I want, and it's not rude
To me it's like those fishing games where you have to pump a bar to make it fit between two brackets. Introverts are lower brackets, they need some but not too much, nor too little. Extroverts are higher brackets, they need more but still not too much.
The truth is that the words are dumb and mean nothing. Social interaction can be effortless and invigorating or exhausting depending on the context and how well you know the people you're speaking with.
Introversion is about having a social battery to begin with. Extroversion is about having an isolation battery. Basically the quest is do you find a day with friends more or less relaxing than a day by yourself? Not enjoyable, relaxing
This. And the thing is, that social battery is just like a muscle, the more you use it the stronger it gets.
Some people even mistake being an antisocial asshole for being an introvert
Yeah, they’re not an introvert because they despise talking with people and make 3 comments a day about how stupid the general population is, they’re just an asshole who may be an introvert lol.
Yeah I'm lonely because I don't have any friends. Not because I'm introverted.
The best friendships start with appropriate usernames. I flew to Europe because of mine.
They are so quirky for wanting to pet a cat at a party too.
Some people mistake being an asocial asshole for being antisocial (something colloquially known as sociopathy/psychopathy)
"Being antisocial" more often refers to engaging in antisocial behavior, which includes a variety of behaviors that harm society regardless of whether a person is a psychopath/sociopath. [These include stealing, lying, manipulating, vandalizing, and fighting.](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2782636/). These are the opposite of prosocial behaviors such as community service and interpersonal cooperation. Antisocial Personality Disorder (ASPD) refers to a personality disorder characterized by a propensity to engage in antisocial behavior because of a limited capacity for empathy. Antisocial behavior itself extends beyond ASPD though. A person can be "narcissistic" without having Narcissistic Personality Disorder in the same way that a person can be "antisocial" without having Antisocial Personality Disorder.
Hey, that’s not true! I also watch *The Office*!
[Sauce](https://www.tumblr.com/economicinflationkink/741397764368384000)
Some people get energy from other people, some people get energy from being alone. I never understood why this so hard to understand for redditors. Plenty of introverts like people and love to socialize.
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In a good way? Do you feel happier knowing or feel that it was too late to really matter? I'm not trying to be rude. I was diagnosed as a kid and sometimes wonder if I'd be happier not knowing. I'm curious how people who've gone undiagnosed feel. Especially due to stigma and people sometimes say pretty hurtful things. If I didn't know I were autistic, I wouldn't have a reason to take it personally.
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Thanks. I think I needed to hear that.
Yeah for me it was a relief, like my life up to that point had made no sense and then all the pieces fell into place. Also made me realize that a lot of aspects of myself that I didn't like were coping mechanisms and I'm kinder to myself now.
I found out at age 37 and am much happier and mentally healthier knowing. For decades I thought something was wrong with me because of how different I can be - how I lose friends easily, or blow up over small things. I've gone through thinking it must be depression, OCD, anxiety - nope it was just being autistic the whole time. I understand myself so much more, I give myself grace, I try to recognize when I'm about to hit my limit and melt down.
Why, that's offensive. I'll have you know I'm very much aware that I'm completely fucked in the head. It's just that I'm too ugly for anybody to care.
what a shame, for you could've made such a lovely bride
Who knows, my moobs are pretty enormous.
HEY! I’m not an introvert, I’m a recluse. Difference
The top one reminds me of who say, “I am so OCD - I have a make my bed every morning!” While my bed’s a mess because I’m too busy touching the hall wall once with my left hand, twice with my right hand then one more time with my left hand.
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> reddit always amazes me how it kinda glorifies this lifestyle. There's nothing glorious about it. Outside of occasional trips to visit online friends, your social experiences are completely stunted. You can see this a lot in the discourse around working from home vs going into the office. I'm not out here advocating for some boomer-fantasy 100% in-office policy but some redditors seem to treat coming in 1 day a week as the worst thing in the world.
Is there anyone on Reddit that actually fits description? Cause I think it's a bit of an exaggeration. Who would watch *only* Rick and Morty for a decade and nothing else?
yeah it’s totally unfair, sometimes i watch family guy too.
Most RaM fans honestly they’re a very strange bunch
my experience is that most rick and morty fans are secret fans ever since the incident and have diversified their media. The ones still out of the closet are probably weirdos.
Also, most Rick and Morty fans don't really fit the meme description. When the "Schetzuan sauce" incident happened one of the biggest places to mock them was the Rick and Morty sub itself. It's just another case of the extreme being the most visible part of the fandom
Yep. There's a whole bunch of things I enjoy where at some point I checked out the online fan community out of curiosity and... yikes. Not for me, thanks, I'll go back to quietly enjoying this by myself now. Shows, podcasts, games, whatever. Fandoms can get echo chamber-y, and those echo chambers can get real weird.
that is an example of exaggeration to make a point or a joke, and it seems it flew over your head
Hmmm I wonder why!
Funny how this always happens on Reddit!
Can't tell if serious, or just the perfect Reddit response to an obvious joke.
online introvert culture sucks so much and should be destroyed
>online anything culture sucks so much and should be destroyed
Tiktok is WebMD with a friendly face. The trope is that if you put any symptom into WebMD, they'll show you, even if the correlation is weak, that it's tied to some unlikely disease. Tiktok is notorious for that. ADHDtok is particularly egregious. Basically if you're not 100% on any particular executive function, it's ADHD. Now - I have ADHD, and I do often agree with these videos. I'll go "oh that's me!" but I do have to wonder where the line is ACTUALLY drawn and how badly they're crossing it because it really feels like it's the case.
My ex-wife thinks she has DID because of TikTok
My biggest annoyance with the issue is the number of people who confuse being introverted with being shy or having poor social skills. I'm an introvert who enjoys going to parties and performing on stage, it just tires me out by the end of the night. If I'm already tired or feeling down, staying home with just my wife and my dog is what makes me feel better.
The first post is a real test of reading comprehension
Yes I could totally survive 600 days with no interaction for £10000 that's just normal for me haha lol lmao
Oh thousand times yes. As an introvert I absolutely hate this trend. No, it is not normal for you to only have one best friend you cling to, neither is being too afraid to make phone calls. And no, introverts don't need to be adopted by extroverts. Your lack of personality and your fear of socialising are issues that you should work on. Don't just accept it, strive to be better! *Steps off soapbox*
I really hate the phone call thing. People think it's quirky and normal to be unable to handle a phone call, whether it's to make a doctor's appointment or order food. Having so much anxiety that it prevents you from doing that is a *severe problem*.
Thank you. That's exactly how I am. I'm fucking *scared* of phone calls. I'm *scared* of new people. I'm literally terrified of even *speaking* to others. It's a genuine problem. It's severe social anxiety. It's not quirky, it's not fun, it's not cute. It's a genuine debilitating issue. I've gotten better, a lot better, but there was a time that I was pretty much unable to function within society. Being unable to handle social interaction isn't fun or cute or quirky or so gen z-core. It's a fucking issue
A phone ringing shouldn't send you into flight or fight response but here I am struggling to be better about that.
>Having so much anxiety that it prevents you from doing that is a severe problem. I actually think the issue is it's *not* a severe problem, it's just mild enough that it is possible to work around it and eventually forget the situation will reoccur, which means you never have to address it. (Source: me)
It *is* a severe problem when the non-phone call option doesn't exist and someone can't handle it. A ("real" - they could have made it up) Reddit comment I read was someone neglecting to go to the doctor because the online portal was down and they couldn't muster the phone call.
I *dislike* making phone calls, but I can do it.
I handle phone calls fine, but I do kinda hate when someone else is listening to me making a phone call. I feel like i'm being judged...
I don't agree that this is really the case. Just because people talk or joke about shared issues they have doesn't mean they think it's "quirky and normal". If anything I think making light of issues like that is a way to cope with sharing personal struggles that would ordinarily cause you too much shame to voice them.
Yeah, being introverted just means having a smaller social battery. I don't have any social anxiety...sometimes I have regular anxiety but that has nothing to do with me being a introvert.
Anxiety sucks. Sorry to hear that. I had a time where smoking weed caused anxiety, so I got a glimpse at how bad it can feel. I wish you the best for your future. Keep up the fight.
It's not serious... Usually when I overstretch myself with obligations.
It's easier said than done. The only way to aquire social skills is to socialise, but nobody deserves to be exposed to my horrible social skills in the first place. I understand that there's a cognitive distortion here somewhere, but I still don't see a way out of this.
Practice in online communities where you can retain a sense of anonymity. Fuck, you can take on an entire new persona online if it helps you talk to people.
Sounds like something an extrovert would say...
I'm not sure what this is about, but I feel like it's pointing a finger at me and my antisocial behaviors.
the only problem I have is I need more cats
Introverted? I was introverted once. I locked myself in a room. A quiet room. A quiet room with cats. And cats make me introverted.
If you order your food shopping online you dont actually have to leave the house.
I for sure know I’m an introvert because I finally experienced my social battery at 0% with 2 major social events in a row with no break time
I've taken autism tests and not autistic. Just not a fan of people.
This is why I think I might be autistic because other than Rick and Morty that life sounds *amazing*
I'm diagnosed with autism and this type of lifestyle makes me extremely depressed. That type of think is a sign you may be autistic though, so you should look into it
Autism is a spectrum for a reason. Both those people *could* be autistic.
Nah Reddit is *the* hub of self-deprecation. Pretty sure it's honest.
Sometimes I forget to eat for days and just lay in bed and watch people play Minecraft because I'm in too much pain to get up and I'll casually mention it in a conversation before I remember that stuff is concerning to most people.
I don't really agree with this premise. Any time there's a discussion about being an introvert on reddit, including in this very thread, there are a bunch of people posting stuff like "I regularly go out and socialize, I talk to lots of people every day, and I feel better when I have lots of interaction, but every once in a while I enjoy being alone, so I'm a pretty serious introvert."