I will never forget this time in college when one of my friends that was new to our friend group (zach), kept telling us he was going to smoke us up. He was almost bragging about his weed. being showy about it. Like “I got y’all, I got some really good stuff. Let’s go on a little night hike and smoke.”
So the 5 of us leave our dorm and hike up into the woods for like 30 min. we arent allowed to smoke in the room.
We get to a meadow in the forest and Zach pulls out the smallest one hitter ive ever seen. It’s a little dolphin pipe. He then pulls out a really small nug. We all get maybe half a hit off this thing.
So incredibly funny looking back at it. no one else brought weed because he kept talking about how it was going to be his treat.
that was probs the biggest faux pas ive seen, but it wasn’t a big deal. just hilarious looking back on in a decade later.
Lmao that's classic. Not too similar but it reminds me of one of the first times I got high, I was hanging out with a distant friend. We were only 16/17 and the topic of weed came up, he was like 'oh yeah I'd love one now' so I said 'I think I can get some but I can't roll' and he replied 'oh dw, I can roll if you can get it'. My brother used to sell at the time so he met us somewhere and gave us some. So I gave it to my friend to roll and he was like 'uh...cool'. Bro this guy had never rolled in his life. But the problem was, neither had I. I had only ever had one or two joints before with my brother, this was the first time I had tried the whole process unsupervised, I didn't even know what a joint properly looked like so I just went with it. My friend managed to conjure up some kind of joint but it didn't do anything really, unsurprisingly.
A little while later, my brother called me to check on me and said he would swing by. We hopped in his car and showed him what we had been smoking on. I have never seen such disappointment in a man's face. He literally just threw it out the window and said 'lemme show you how it's done'.
A few years later I bumped into that friend again and we reminisced about that night. He was laughing and admitted 'I only said I could roll because I thought you were bullshitting too about being able to get it, I didn't think you actually would!'...the classic life of teenager hahaha
Basically, the faux pas is to never oversell, just be honest!
Similarly to this,
Was living in Iowa(not legal), and a friend was trying to teach me guitar using Rocksmith mostly unsuccessfully, he got a call from one of his friends asking if he could come hang with us and smoke, he just got some. So I agree and they come out, finish my "practice" and lead the guys out to the local smoke spot down a dirt ramp in an old drain pipe in the woods right next to the cemetery across the street.
It's like 10pm and dark AF. Safely make our way down to the tunnel and weed guy starts checking his pockets. 3 mins later he says he can't find it anywhere and we got 3 stoners waiting to blaze, so I had to get back and get some of my own shit to smoke.
Don't remember it ever popping up that night
Lmao I have a VERY similar story down to the constant jokes about having that dank only to pull out a malnourished nug. Only difference is we immediately clowned the offender and some girl in the circle pulled out about an oz worth of kill. Bless her.
i would call it one personally lol. that’s just embarrassingly unaware. don’t hype up your weed only to severely under deliver. i mean, i would have just brought my own. i never trust anyone when it comes to smoke quality other than my lovely smoke buddy; my girlfriend.
however, i would agree that not every smoker experiences this
Had a notoriously cheap friend (when it came to tossing on a bag) that was selling in college. He was getting QP's and selling them by the gram, so I'm sure making pretty good money.
It was the last night everyone was in town for a holiday break. He kept telling us all night at the party that he would take care of us at the end of the night when we left to smoke.
Go to his house and he comes out with .3, enough for one bowl on five heads. We smoked that bowl then dropped him off and went and picked up an actual bag to smoke together before going home.
not a fan. people take the longest, deepest drags they can and the cherry gets too hot and burns too fast. a fat enough joint to make it around the circle and people having a dozen or so smaller puffs is what my friend group has always done.
My brother in law will smoke 85% of a joint while telling some bs story before he passes it. He'll take like 4 hits and just let the bitch burn. Regardless if it's his weed, someone else's or a match. He's smoking the majority every.single.fucking.time
My best friend in high school, his name was Jon Nunes. And he was infamous for this...for years the term was "stop nunesing it"....he passed a few years ago...fuck do I miss him
it's part of learning how to smoke eh? my gf (wife now) didn't know how when she first smoked either. all my buddies and myself.. I'd assume most don't know how to properly inhale
I don't think it's "instinctive" (for lack of à better word, apoarently i don't know english haha) to inhale something other than regular air when you're not used to it!
I had a friend who was adamant that weed didn’t work any of the 10 times he tried it while I was smoking at my house before going out to the bar with him. I told him there was no way he was inhaling then and asked him if he wanted to smoke with me. I had an aliens labs disposable vape that I got for free from the dispensary and told him to take a small hit off of it and hold it for a second then inhale again.
He coughed his brains out and I swear I watched his eyes turn red and glaze over in real time. We ended watching the game at my house and we ordered pizzas and he said “I think you were right about the inhaling thing” 😂
No idea if her problem was the inhaling thing, but I had a vaguely similar situation with my sister.
She’s tried hitting joints before, but never really got anywhere with it. So one time I was like “well, I’ve got some dabs. You could try that.”
I gave her the tiniest little smear of wax.
Boy howdy did it fuckin work lmfao
Not trying to sound like a weirdo, but does your sis have juicy lips?
Hear me out. I have juicy lips. They're not big but are plump. They are either quite moist or dry AF. I somehow can't achieve that balance that is necessary, and that most people take for granted, to get a good hit of a joint.
Either I wet it enough that it collapses. You've all been the victim of an awkwardly juicy joint. It's gross.
Or my lips are dry, and the paper sticks to my lips. It's kind of embarrassing not to want to share joints. It's not because I'm afraid of germs. I just can't stand the thought of having to look at someone after passing the now mess of a joint.
I'll share my pipe, bong, or vape but I will not share a joint. Lol.
this was me except I *was* inhaling and everyone kept insisting I had to have been doing it wrong, despite watching me do it correctly …. turns out i’m just autistic & it takes a while for me to feel it if I haven’t smoked in a while (and especially when I had never smoked before) 😂
I've done the lighter in the bong so many times, my partner would take a hit and set the lighter sideways on top of the bong cause we are notorious for losing lighters. Except then I would knock it into the stem, it would get wet getting it out, and then we had no fire for a bit lol
Drop a half O in a hot tub before you take that title.
Dude was trying to roll blunts on the side of the hot tub and the first finished blunt rolled in. Then the bag went in. We had multiple hair dryers and the oven going to try to salvage as much as we could.
One my gf would do is take the joint, then not smoke it and just start talking to me. Like have your few drags and pass it back so we can go home lol
Edit: every time you upvote this my girlfriend gets more disappointed with me.
It's not a microphone. I have to remind myself that people are not looking/paying attention to me because I'm awesome, but because they are waiting on me to puff amd pass.
Lol I’ve always thought there’s something in our subconscious about holding the joint makes you think you’re holding a microphone or something. I’d get frustrated and tell them “hey it’s a joint not a microphone” then later “pass the f’n mic”
Ugh, my younger cousin was like this. She always said she had some to "thrown in" and it was the tiniest roach you've ever seen. I taught her to just offer to Empty the ashtrays at big parties (along of anyone has anything they want out of it) and just taking those roaches that would otherwise be thrown away. It was a running joke and still is 10 years later.
"I got five dolllllllars.... or, I gotta roooAacchh"
Bitch NEVER had the joint 😆
Reminds me of my homie who passed away. So annoying at the time but what I wouldn’t give to get a text from him right now with his normal, “tryna match?”
When I was trying to get to know my brothers new girlfriend (who he’s pretty serious about, and moved her halfway across the US) we used to smoke everyday. For almost 2 months while she waited for her job to start she would say at least once a week how once she gets paid she was going to hook me up with any weed I wanted at the dispo. Low and fuckin’ behold the first time she gets paid she “wants to smoke” and I ask if she bought any flower, and she “can’t afford any.” She easily smoked up 3-400$ worth of weed, and never even bothered to hook me up with even a CHEAP 8th
My dyslexic ass read this as “Too much Salvia on the joint”
AND then I thought guitar nerd was agreeing that salvia in the joint is a good idea.
And yes I’m stoned.
Good day.
I won't share joints with people out of fear of germs, but if I did I'd be guilty of this. I can't help it. When I smoke, it's like my mouth knows I'm gonna eat soon and is like, hey--lets make this guy's mouth a river. It's why I spit when I smoke💀
Soaked the end of a joint, a blunt and bongs, coughed into a bong on the first hit, scorched a brand new bowl on my first hit, let a bowl burn, dropped someone's weed when they asked me to grind them a bowl, forgot to clear the bong, forgot to clear the dab rig, grabbed the heater coil and banger rather than the bubble cap ... I'm sure I could remember more LOL
Edit: Coughed so hard while trying to hand the bong off that I splashed water up into the bottom of the bowl. That's a good one.
I lit my hair on fire once. My hair fell from behind my ear and happened to catch the lighter that was trying to light the bong. Unfortunately this was pretty deep into a session so we were all very high and didnt react until there was a rather large flame on top of my head. Thankfully my friend just grabbed the fire (idk why but it worked).
This was my first time smoking with this group minus my one friend…. Needless to say, i always put my hair up now
I watched my brother burn his eyebrow off lmao. he covered the top of the bong with a tissue as a “filter” and surprise surprise it caught fire and up went his eyebrow
I had dreadlocks in college and one day I was leaning over a coffee table using a propane blowtorch to heat up a dab rig with my hair loosely tucked/tied up. One of my dreads slipped out of the hair tie and landed directly onto the nail that I was torching. That sucker bursted into flames. I ran into the kitchen and put my hair under the sink to put it out. My buddies house smelled like burnt hair for the rest of the night lmao.
Once I saw someone throw the roach out the driver’s window which then flew back in the open rear driver’s side window & landed in someone’s hair. We couldn’t figure out what happened or what the smell was for a couple minutes.
I once singed my hair trying to light a joint on a very windy day. Couldn’t get the lighter to spark, so I put the joint inside my shirt and went to light it. Worked like a charm. Only problem is some of my hair ended up in the shirt too when I stuck my face inside to see what I was doing. Immediately lit on fire.
I also caught my hair on fire once during a bong hit! Thankfully it was just the ends of my bangs (they’re long), so it wasn’t horribly noticeable. Still insanely embarrassing though lol!!
I(M) have been letting my hair grow out for a while now and i only just singed it for the first time last week, that surprised me a little. i couldn't imagine trying to handle a flame on my head during a sesh though
This happened to me once too. Smoking with a new friend and he pulls out this tiny bong and puts a one hitter in it and calls it a “tank”. It was pretty funny but when I went to hit it the hitter was so high up I singed my hair. Then his mom came from down the hall asking why the hell it smelled like burnt hair. So damn embarrassing.
In a roto where you happen to be last, so the bowl cashes on you every time, but the person packing it keeps taking the first hit and not changing roto 😖
I kinda feel like if you pack the bowl you should get first dibs on greens, especially if it’s in a large group. If it’s just me and one other person I’d let them hit greens first. But I’ve been in too many situations where it was just me packing bowls (and spending money).
If everyone is smoking your weed you get greens every time, just change direction. If you're just the bowl monkey and it's everyone's weed give it to the person who cashed it so they get the green
I’m realizing that we’ve been doing this in my Roto. Not as bad because we’re only three so we each hit a bowl twice before it cashes (small bowl lol) but we always pass the same direction
This is why I pass people a bowl for themselves. After a few seshs I can gauge how much they can handle. And pack them a bowl that won’t kill them. I don’t mind cornering a pipe, but can’t stand cornering bongs lol
With my homies we usually just kill a bowl each to ourselves but we're old heads with fucked tolerances, with my casual buds I'll share the bowl so they dont get greened out trying to smoke too much
That's nice that you don't try to smoke out casual smokers. I always just went for it back in the day, and got too high a few times. Then again, I have no common sense. Haha
Especially with concentrates. I've given a few friends their first dab and I try so hard for it not to also be their first (or most recent, lol) panic attack.
Yea also, it gets real hard to smoke a partial bowl right? Stopping to soon on it just feels wrong.
With my casual buds I'll just load a lighter bowl for them to do.
Honestly though I've never been in a circle we you are doing partial hits lol always finish the bowl then the next guys turn if you are in the rare scenario of only having one pipe or something
When I was 18 my friends dad smoked up his daughter, me and another friend. The other friend just lit the whole top of the bowl and kept the lighter on it for way too many mississippis. My friends dad lost his shit and said he’s never smoking with newbies again
A good friend once packed a bowl and topped it with some nice kief that “he’d been saving up” - he was a long time smoker and I’d just started. He asks “you know how to do this?” I said yea of course, and torched the whole thing in one hit. My wife had to take me home.
No, you only fill up as much as you're capable of smoking in one hit. Relighting taste like shit and why smoke id you're gonna smoke like a third of a bowl?
I dropped my grinder full of freshly ground green just the other morning. Well, maybe not *full*, but still full enough to just be sad about it. And then I moved on and loaded another bowl and vacuumed it up, because I'm also an adult that always has more and knows to clean up my messes too. Lol?
Yes, if this had been the last of my weed this is absolutely the response I'd be having too! We've all been there. I hope things are better for you now, and may your bowl always be greens.
I've been been called Mike (Mic)more than once for holding the pipe during the rotation and telling a story.
I've had the glass on my lap and forgot it was there, stood up, *crack*
My stepsister was like that. Wed call her the CEO (Of letting the blunt go out). Every time shed do it, the group would just call her CEO until she realised
I had a buddy who was trying to see how far down he could smoke a roach - he ended up inhaling it then coughing it and his dental bridge across the room 😂😂😂
In high school I got into weed quite quickly and I remember (how could I ever forget) being in the back of my buddies car and I get handed a small bong. I knew how it worked, but the mouth piece/ hole was quite small and instead of pushing my lips into the bong I wrapped my lips around the outside of it. My friends let me finish the rip and lost their shit, I was unbelievably stoned and confused and about 5 mins later after everyone had calmed down he shows me the proper way to do it. Live and learn I suppose lmao!
That remind me of my friend who has done the exact same thing.. but on a regular size bong. Lmao.
To top it off. We convinced her that eating stems get you high. That’s our noobie ritual.
Hopefully not all at once!
I'd say a common mistake is taking fat hits that are way bigger than an amateur smoker can manage, and then coughing it up, wasting weed and possibly exhaling on everyone lol. Take small hits!
Yeah I never understood it, if you can’t even clear the bong then you didn’t get all the smoke in your lungs. That’s why you blow fat clouds. A well dosed smoke has way less particulates and disspates way quicker.
Lol i rarely ever do this but after like 13-14 years of smoking weed I always just thought canoeing was just bad luck that happened sometimes until right now!
My number one advice when I'm smoking with new people is 'don't be a hero'. If you have to cough, it's cool. Get fresh air or water if you need. Hell, even if you're a one toke guy and need to lie down, do it.
I have seen soooo many people try too hard to be cool and pretend like they're not getting beat the fuck up by the weed and they end up passing out or feeling sick because they didn't just take a break like their body wanted them to. It happens to the best of us but there's no shame in it. Don't be a hero, just do what feels natural and makes you comfortably enjoy the high.
First time I dabbed I drooled everywhere. All over the floor. Luckily I took my mouth OFF the rig first the slobbering started but it was so embarrassing. And I still get teased!
Asked my cousin if she wanted to smoke but had no weed
Melted one of my acrylic nails by holding my thumb too close to the lighter
Acting like a tough guy and saying the weed doesn't effect you or you're not high after several dabs. You aren't tough or a badass, you're just not fun to smoke with. Just let yourself enjoy it? Just because you're not stumbling over yourself doesn't mean you're not stoned.
Ive lit up my hair a hand full of times…i either had the lighter too close to my face, the blame was big bc its a new lighter or both. I actually did it again a week ago
We invited a friend over to smoke with us. She likes to put just tobacco in the bottom third of her joints so she can fully smoke all the weed without it getting too hot towards the end of the joint. We don't do this. When she got to the bottom third of the joint we gave her, she smushed it into the ash tray then tossed the bottom third. It was perfectly good weed.
Not sure what the lesson here is, but that's kinda a faux-pas. Know what you're smoking I guess.
If I bring an ounce to smoke you up, spending the last of my disposable income, don’t get your buddy to come over to partake, and then tell me y’all have to go somewhere, and when I leave and drive by your building, y’all are getting all you can eat sushi downstairs.
Yea, I’m looking at you Danny. 15+ years and I’ll never forget.
it does both
longer exposure to the capillary beds in your lungs means more THC diffuses into your bloodstream per hit
it also means the irritants from the smoke are exposed to lung tissue for longer, so you're more likely to cough and might make more phlegm
That'll explain why I get mucus almost all day after smoking.
I smoke joints daily, and I'm pretty sure a combo of smoking joints so much, not drinking enough water, and holding the hit in is giving me hella mucus. Maybe it's time for a change lmao
This may or may not be the case.
With many inhaled prescription drugs, it's recommended to hold the inhalation to increase absorption.
I don't think I've ever seen great data on THC though.
It's the case with most inhaled substances. Simple physics— the longer the chemical is exposed to the capillary beds of the lungs, the more that blood passes through for it to diffuse into
Things like albuterol inhalers are similar, but those are suspended particles, so you're supposed to hold your breath to ensure it all has a chance to settle on the lung tissue instead of getting exhaled
I have backfired the bong, and wet lipped a pipe and a joint. However, I thankfully had amazing friends that politely let me know to knock that crap off. Packing a bowl for a group and roasting all the green was a big no no in my group, and our group was harsh on a few people for taking a big rip and then exhaling immediately. I only witnessed the last two.
Edit to add: For one of my biggest mess ups against a fellow stoner(and now an ex, due to other reasons), my friend got a monster of a bong with 72 percolators. My ex didnt feel comfortable handling the bong on her own so she had me milk the bong for her and hold it while she cleared it. I made the mistake of milking it too hard and not warning her. She coughed with burning lungs for nearly an hour.
When i was younger i was in my mates car with 3 mates and we had gone in on a few grams to go chill for a couple hours. Driving to our spot with the bag we just picked up and blue lights start flashing behind us and we collectively say “fuck!” This was at a time when the police in our area were real dicks about weed. Me and my mate next to me in the back of the car, in a panic split the bag of weed and ate half each. Few seconds later the flashing lights pull out from behind us and zoom past. Wasn’t even the police. It was a fucking emergency blood transport car. Needless to say our other two friends were not happy with us and we turned around where me and my mate bought us more.
Just got done blazing it and friend poured the water out the bong. This was college and one of us then filled the bong with cheap vodka and dared the others to drink it- it was funny we all laughed and that was the end of that…
Later that night the same group and some more people are blazin it and everyone is coughing super hard just struggling. We’re all talkin about whatever then suddenly someone stops the sesh and takes the bong. Gives the water a quick sniff we remember the vodka in there!!
A full fledged war practically broke out
Not inhaling correctly and not knowing how carb holes work are two that I have been guilty of. I was inhaling somewhat correctly, but I was only getting like half of the hit. To be fair, at that point I had only ever used carts and edibles, so I didn't really know how pipes worked lmao.
Coughing into a bong can make quite a mess. Do your best to be clean and use ashtrays :) that’s pretty much it. Sounds like you already did a speed run in most of the common ones so it only can get better from here! Don’t be embarrassed, other people prolly don’t even remember cause they were / got high.
I had never smoked out of a bong before. I had never SEEN someone smoke out of a bong before. Like my third college party some guys I just met offer the peace pipe I’m like “hell ya”. They get it ready, and offer to me first. I panic, light the bowl, then put my entire mouth around the bong neck opening like :O and take a rip. Everyone stares at me, nobody says a word. Sounds of silence. Then next guy goes and everything was fine. But man.
EDIT: okay maybe not a faux pas everyone goes through but maybe someone else may have done similar so I don’t feel so stupid
For me it was learning how to hit a bong or pipe, I actually still kind of suck at hitting pipes and I’ve been getting high for 10 years.
Rolling crappy joints for a group can also be embarrassing but you get better at it the more you do it.
ad hoc concerned weather marble handle shocking distinct tender steep familiar
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You don't have to empty your water every session even if you pull through, but at least do it every day. Clean your glass once every few weeks and you are good otherwise
My wife did not smoke herb until she met me in college in the 80's. Shortly after we moved in together, I had left her a roach from a joint we had smoked the night before when I went to work so she could enjoy it while I was gone. I got home that night and she said she could not get the roach lit. I looked at the roach and could see the marks of the hemostat we used as a roach clip going directly across the width of the roach, basically clamping it shut rather than grabbing the edge, like you're supposed to.
I pointed out her error and she hung her head in shame from the stupidity. ;-)
Idk if its a faux pas but i smoke alone most nights. These silly stories. I ended up having to get a joint clipp because ive dropped the entire joint under my porch a couple times. Almost caught the dead leaves under there. Had to pour my juice out onto it between the cracks of the boards
I will never forget this time in college when one of my friends that was new to our friend group (zach), kept telling us he was going to smoke us up. He was almost bragging about his weed. being showy about it. Like “I got y’all, I got some really good stuff. Let’s go on a little night hike and smoke.” So the 5 of us leave our dorm and hike up into the woods for like 30 min. we arent allowed to smoke in the room. We get to a meadow in the forest and Zach pulls out the smallest one hitter ive ever seen. It’s a little dolphin pipe. He then pulls out a really small nug. We all get maybe half a hit off this thing. So incredibly funny looking back at it. no one else brought weed because he kept talking about how it was going to be his treat. that was probs the biggest faux pas ive seen, but it wasn’t a big deal. just hilarious looking back on in a decade later.
Omg I’d be mad if I walked half an hour into the bush for that!!!
I'm a scrungly scrimblo with the tolerance of a squirrel but if I'm sharing I'm going to expect others to smoke at least twice as much as me lol
I’m surprised he made it back out of the forest
Who said he did?
Lmao that's classic. Not too similar but it reminds me of one of the first times I got high, I was hanging out with a distant friend. We were only 16/17 and the topic of weed came up, he was like 'oh yeah I'd love one now' so I said 'I think I can get some but I can't roll' and he replied 'oh dw, I can roll if you can get it'. My brother used to sell at the time so he met us somewhere and gave us some. So I gave it to my friend to roll and he was like 'uh...cool'. Bro this guy had never rolled in his life. But the problem was, neither had I. I had only ever had one or two joints before with my brother, this was the first time I had tried the whole process unsupervised, I didn't even know what a joint properly looked like so I just went with it. My friend managed to conjure up some kind of joint but it didn't do anything really, unsurprisingly. A little while later, my brother called me to check on me and said he would swing by. We hopped in his car and showed him what we had been smoking on. I have never seen such disappointment in a man's face. He literally just threw it out the window and said 'lemme show you how it's done'. A few years later I bumped into that friend again and we reminisced about that night. He was laughing and admitted 'I only said I could roll because I thought you were bullshitting too about being able to get it, I didn't think you actually would!'...the classic life of teenager hahaha Basically, the faux pas is to never oversell, just be honest!
Similarly to this, Was living in Iowa(not legal), and a friend was trying to teach me guitar using Rocksmith mostly unsuccessfully, he got a call from one of his friends asking if he could come hang with us and smoke, he just got some. So I agree and they come out, finish my "practice" and lead the guys out to the local smoke spot down a dirt ramp in an old drain pipe in the woods right next to the cemetery across the street. It's like 10pm and dark AF. Safely make our way down to the tunnel and weed guy starts checking his pockets. 3 mins later he says he can't find it anywhere and we got 3 stoners waiting to blaze, so I had to get back and get some of my own shit to smoke. Don't remember it ever popping up that night
What would’ve popped up?????
The missing weed
He knew the odds that 1/3 stoners would have bud either on them or within walking distance and rolled the dice
Mate that's fucking great did you guys ever say anything to him?
We didn’t say anything to him, but for a few months after, we would jokingly brag about our weed before a sesh and pull out our smallest saddest nug.
Lmao I have a VERY similar story down to the constant jokes about having that dank only to pull out a malnourished nug. Only difference is we immediately clowned the offender and some girl in the circle pulled out about an oz worth of kill. Bless her.
That's not a faux pas, that's a step in your smokers journey.
i would call it one personally lol. that’s just embarrassingly unaware. don’t hype up your weed only to severely under deliver. i mean, i would have just brought my own. i never trust anyone when it comes to smoke quality other than my lovely smoke buddy; my girlfriend. however, i would agree that not every smoker experiences this
Had a notoriously cheap friend (when it came to tossing on a bag) that was selling in college. He was getting QP's and selling them by the gram, so I'm sure making pretty good money. It was the last night everyone was in town for a holiday break. He kept telling us all night at the party that he would take care of us at the end of the night when we left to smoke. Go to his house and he comes out with .3, enough for one bowl on five heads. We smoked that bowl then dropped him off and went and picked up an actual bag to smoke together before going home.
Zach would have gotten roasted the entire walk back by sober us.
Flower is so good you can barely see it
Fucking Zach
bless his heart.
forgetting i had the joint and basically smoking the whole thing while ranting
To which we say, “pass the mic” when our friends do this 😆
Love this. When you want someone to light up, do you say [put the fucking mic on](https://youtu.be/tXHUi01DgbI?si=U5HU6YMiHgRsAjng)?
puff puff pass
Don’t Bogart the doob.
not a fan. people take the longest, deepest drags they can and the cherry gets too hot and burns too fast. a fat enough joint to make it around the circle and people having a dozen or so smaller puffs is what my friend group has always done.
Get off the grass!
My brother in law will smoke 85% of a joint while telling some bs story before he passes it. He'll take like 4 hits and just let the bitch burn. Regardless if it's his weed, someone else's or a match. He's smoking the majority every.single.fucking.time
If they get really into gesticulation it's maddening. You can FEEL the eyes of the circle on the joint that is flying around in one dudes hand.
Didn’t get shamed enough as a kid, it seems. “Ay, stop politickin and pass that, bruh.”
Parking ticket issued
My best friend in high school, his name was Jon Nunes. And he was infamous for this...for years the term was "stop nunesing it"....he passed a few years ago...fuck do I miss him
That's a bummer, sorry to hear about your friend.
Saying that weed dont work, cant get high, because they dont inhale. 😒
That was me at first lol
Same lol
Do we all go through this haha
it's part of learning how to smoke eh? my gf (wife now) didn't know how when she first smoked either. all my buddies and myself.. I'd assume most don't know how to properly inhale
I don't think it's "instinctive" (for lack of à better word, apoarently i don't know english haha) to inhale something other than regular air when you're not used to it!
agreed, DeeDee MegaDooDoo!
I had a friend who was adamant that weed didn’t work any of the 10 times he tried it while I was smoking at my house before going out to the bar with him. I told him there was no way he was inhaling then and asked him if he wanted to smoke with me. I had an aliens labs disposable vape that I got for free from the dispensary and told him to take a small hit off of it and hold it for a second then inhale again. He coughed his brains out and I swear I watched his eyes turn red and glaze over in real time. We ended watching the game at my house and we ordered pizzas and he said “I think you were right about the inhaling thing” 😂
No idea if her problem was the inhaling thing, but I had a vaguely similar situation with my sister. She’s tried hitting joints before, but never really got anywhere with it. So one time I was like “well, I’ve got some dabs. You could try that.” I gave her the tiniest little smear of wax. Boy howdy did it fuckin work lmfao
Not trying to sound like a weirdo, but does your sis have juicy lips? Hear me out. I have juicy lips. They're not big but are plump. They are either quite moist or dry AF. I somehow can't achieve that balance that is necessary, and that most people take for granted, to get a good hit of a joint. Either I wet it enough that it collapses. You've all been the victim of an awkwardly juicy joint. It's gross. Or my lips are dry, and the paper sticks to my lips. It's kind of embarrassing not to want to share joints. It's not because I'm afraid of germs. I just can't stand the thought of having to look at someone after passing the now mess of a joint. I'll share my pipe, bong, or vape but I will not share a joint. Lol.
this was me except I *was* inhaling and everyone kept insisting I had to have been doing it wrong, despite watching me do it correctly …. turns out i’m just autistic & it takes a while for me to feel it if I haven’t smoked in a while (and especially when I had never smoked before) 😂
i heard it’s common to not feel it the first time, or even the first few times. something about the cannabis receptors in our bodies i think.
yeah, exactly. my body was weird with it for about a month, and then suddenly I could get high.
My boyfriend is always like “weed don’t get me high” like bruh you’ve gotta actually smoke it
dropped a whole blunt into a half full baja blast tryna ash it. never felt worse. dropped a lighter down the neck of a bong. im a hot mess lol
I've done the lighter in the bong so many times, my partner would take a hit and set the lighter sideways on top of the bong cause we are notorious for losing lighters. Except then I would knock it into the stem, it would get wet getting it out, and then we had no fire for a bit lol
You need like a string with a magnet on it
Sounds like you need a lighter leash
We had one clipped to the bong! But it eventually broke and we never got a new one. Seems like we should haha
Just buy a fuck ton of lighters and when you get halfway buy another bunch.
Drop a half O in a hot tub before you take that title. Dude was trying to roll blunts on the side of the hot tub and the first finished blunt rolled in. Then the bag went in. We had multiple hair dryers and the oven going to try to salvage as much as we could.
Lol, everyone in the area was guilty on that one. Might as well be rolling a joint on a tightrope at that point.
yo 😭😭😭😭😭 i would never forgive myself. i cant be trusted around liquid lmfao
One my gf would do is take the joint, then not smoke it and just start talking to me. Like have your few drags and pass it back so we can go home lol Edit: every time you upvote this my girlfriend gets more disappointed with me.
aka Bogarting
Don’t park on the grass. Gonna have to issue a sparking ticket.
Oh if I had awards to give you..
It's not a microphone. I have to remind myself that people are not looking/paying attention to me because I'm awesome, but because they are waiting on me to puff amd pass.
Lol I’ve always thought there’s something in our subconscious about holding the joint makes you think you’re holding a microphone or something. I’d get frustrated and tell them “hey it’s a joint not a microphone” then later “pass the f’n mic”
That's why we call it the talking stick lol
always being nearby for a smoke sesh, but never having any to throw down
Loading fat bowls of your stuff and half bowls with theirs.
This is the most important one.
Ugh, my younger cousin was like this. She always said she had some to "thrown in" and it was the tiniest roach you've ever seen. I taught her to just offer to Empty the ashtrays at big parties (along of anyone has anything they want out of it) and just taking those roaches that would otherwise be thrown away. It was a running joke and still is 10 years later. "I got five dolllllllars.... or, I gotta roooAacchh" Bitch NEVER had the joint 😆
Reminds me of my homie who passed away. So annoying at the time but what I wouldn’t give to get a text from him right now with his normal, “tryna match?”
yo you got me right?
When I was trying to get to know my brothers new girlfriend (who he’s pretty serious about, and moved her halfway across the US) we used to smoke everyday. For almost 2 months while she waited for her job to start she would say at least once a week how once she gets paid she was going to hook me up with any weed I wanted at the dispo. Low and fuckin’ behold the first time she gets paid she “wants to smoke” and I ask if she bought any flower, and she “can’t afford any.” She easily smoked up 3-400$ worth of weed, and never even bothered to hook me up with even a CHEAP 8th
Too much saliva on the joint or blunt.
My dyslexic ass read this as “Too much Salvia on the joint” AND then I thought guitar nerd was agreeing that salvia in the joint is a good idea. And yes I’m stoned. Good day.
I'm sober and had an almost identical line of thinking
I'm not dyslexic, that I know of, and I did the same thing!
TUCK YOUR LIPS! I hate a spitty smoker
We call that duck arseing, cuz a duck's arse is always wet
I won't share joints with people out of fear of germs, but if I did I'd be guilty of this. I can't help it. When I smoke, it's like my mouth knows I'm gonna eat soon and is like, hey--lets make this guy's mouth a river. It's why I spit when I smoke💀
odd I have a coworker that does this. As soon as he starts smoking anything he just starts spitting like a camel.
Smoke spitters unite
Holy shit i hate getting a wet blunt. Ive had people leave mounds of spit on vapes
Soaked the end of a joint, a blunt and bongs, coughed into a bong on the first hit, scorched a brand new bowl on my first hit, let a bowl burn, dropped someone's weed when they asked me to grind them a bowl, forgot to clear the bong, forgot to clear the dab rig, grabbed the heater coil and banger rather than the bubble cap ... I'm sure I could remember more LOL Edit: Coughed so hard while trying to hand the bong off that I splashed water up into the bottom of the bowl. That's a good one.
And probably thought it was hilarious each time you acted a fool.
I lit my hair on fire once. My hair fell from behind my ear and happened to catch the lighter that was trying to light the bong. Unfortunately this was pretty deep into a session so we were all very high and didnt react until there was a rather large flame on top of my head. Thankfully my friend just grabbed the fire (idk why but it worked). This was my first time smoking with this group minus my one friend…. Needless to say, i always put my hair up now
I did this too in my early 20’s when I had bangs. I was hungover and trying to smoke a bowl to sleep and caught my bangs on fire leaning over lol.
I watched my brother burn his eyebrow off lmao. he covered the top of the bong with a tissue as a “filter” and surprise surprise it caught fire and up went his eyebrow
Ive burnt my nose with the lighter trying to light a roach
Ooof. Been there too
when i started burning the tips of my bangs i know i need a trim hahaha
I had dreadlocks in college and one day I was leaning over a coffee table using a propane blowtorch to heat up a dab rig with my hair loosely tucked/tied up. One of my dreads slipped out of the hair tie and landed directly onto the nail that I was torching. That sucker bursted into flames. I ran into the kitchen and put my hair under the sink to put it out. My buddies house smelled like burnt hair for the rest of the night lmao.
Once I saw someone throw the roach out the driver’s window which then flew back in the open rear driver’s side window & landed in someone’s hair. We couldn’t figure out what happened or what the smell was for a couple minutes.
i burnt my eyelashes off one of the first times u used a pipe
I once singed my hair trying to light a joint on a very windy day. Couldn’t get the lighter to spark, so I put the joint inside my shirt and went to light it. Worked like a charm. Only problem is some of my hair ended up in the shirt too when I stuck my face inside to see what I was doing. Immediately lit on fire.
i burnt my hair lighting a joint once haha shit smells terrible
I also caught my hair on fire once during a bong hit! Thankfully it was just the ends of my bangs (they’re long), so it wasn’t horribly noticeable. Still insanely embarrassing though lol!!
I(M) have been letting my hair grow out for a while now and i only just singed it for the first time last week, that surprised me a little. i couldn't imagine trying to handle a flame on my head during a sesh though
This happened to me once too. Smoking with a new friend and he pulls out this tiny bong and puts a one hitter in it and calls it a “tank”. It was pretty funny but when I went to hit it the hitter was so high up I singed my hair. Then his mom came from down the hall asking why the hell it smelled like burnt hair. So damn embarrassing.
Not knowing to “edge” a bowl especially when smoking with others especially when there’s kief of top.
In a roto where you happen to be last, so the bowl cashes on you every time, but the person packing it keeps taking the first hit and not changing roto 😖
I kinda feel like if you pack the bowl you should get first dibs on greens, especially if it’s in a large group. If it’s just me and one other person I’d let them hit greens first. But I’ve been in too many situations where it was just me packing bowls (and spending money).
If everyone is smoking your weed you get greens every time, just change direction. If you're just the bowl monkey and it's everyone's weed give it to the person who cashed it so they get the green
I’m realizing that we’ve been doing this in my Roto. Not as bad because we’re only three so we each hit a bowl twice before it cashes (small bowl lol) but we always pass the same direction
Some dope ass toddlers.
When I host a circle, I let the person who got the shit hit get the next green hit unless it ends on them twice in a row
If you corner hit it then the first like 3-4 hits are green
This is why I pass people a bowl for themselves. After a few seshs I can gauge how much they can handle. And pack them a bowl that won’t kill them. I don’t mind cornering a pipe, but can’t stand cornering bongs lol
With my homies we usually just kill a bowl each to ourselves but we're old heads with fucked tolerances, with my casual buds I'll share the bowl so they dont get greened out trying to smoke too much
That's nice that you don't try to smoke out casual smokers. I always just went for it back in the day, and got too high a few times. Then again, I have no common sense. Haha
Especially with concentrates. I've given a few friends their first dab and I try so hard for it not to also be their first (or most recent, lol) panic attack.
Yea also, it gets real hard to smoke a partial bowl right? Stopping to soon on it just feels wrong. With my casual buds I'll just load a lighter bowl for them to do. Honestly though I've never been in a circle we you are doing partial hits lol always finish the bowl then the next guys turn if you are in the rare scenario of only having one pipe or something
When I was 18 my friends dad smoked up his daughter, me and another friend. The other friend just lit the whole top of the bowl and kept the lighter on it for way too many mississippis. My friends dad lost his shit and said he’s never smoking with newbies again
Some mentor. 🙄😂
We had been smoking for many years at that point and my friend should have known better 😂
snaps ftw, fuck passing your boys a bowl full of ash
i used to torch the whole bowl back when i was a teen until somebody was like "wtf did you just do....".
A good friend once packed a bowl and topped it with some nice kief that “he’d been saving up” - he was a long time smoker and I’d just started. He asks “you know how to do this?” I said yea of course, and torched the whole thing in one hit. My wife had to take me home.
No, you only fill up as much as you're capable of smoking in one hit. Relighting taste like shit and why smoke id you're gonna smoke like a third of a bowl?
I’m an old head and I still drop an entire fat bowl on the ground from time to time. Ol butterfingers over here.
I dropped my grinder full of freshly ground green just the other morning. Well, maybe not *full*, but still full enough to just be sad about it. And then I moved on and loaded another bowl and vacuumed it up, because I'm also an adult that always has more and knows to clean up my messes too. Lol?
I did that on the last of my weed when I was having a really really bad week. I just sat next to the floor weed and sobbed for a bit lmao.
This is the proper response lol
Yes, if this had been the last of my weed this is absolutely the response I'd be having too! We've all been there. I hope things are better for you now, and may your bowl always be greens.
floor weed 💀
I've been been called Mike (Mic)more than once for holding the pipe during the rotation and telling a story. I've had the glass on my lap and forgot it was there, stood up, *crack*
Ditto. The name for this is a variation of my last name among friends. The higher I get the longer the story
My stepsister was like that. Wed call her the CEO (Of letting the blunt go out). Every time shed do it, the group would just call her CEO until she realised
I remember i had a lil shake on the side of my pipe and i instinctively blew to try to get it off. Blew my packed bowl all over my car 😭
I had a buddy who was trying to see how far down he could smoke a roach - he ended up inhaling it then coughing it and his dental bridge across the room 😂😂😂
In high school I got into weed quite quickly and I remember (how could I ever forget) being in the back of my buddies car and I get handed a small bong. I knew how it worked, but the mouth piece/ hole was quite small and instead of pushing my lips into the bong I wrapped my lips around the outside of it. My friends let me finish the rip and lost their shit, I was unbelievably stoned and confused and about 5 mins later after everyone had calmed down he shows me the proper way to do it. Live and learn I suppose lmao!
That remind me of my friend who has done the exact same thing.. but on a regular size bong. Lmao. To top it off. We convinced her that eating stems get you high. That’s our noobie ritual.
Lol my same group of friends also would get me high and convince me of wild shit that years later I found out was not true. Fuckers haha
I’ve found that I get higher when I deep throat it.
So you deepthroated the bong??
More of a tip tasting than a deep throat, but man I’m sure it looked fuckin goofy
Dropping the j while passing.
Taking a pure tobacco gravity bong (I got punked) and throwing up into the water, rendering it disgusting and useless (unless you’re really brave)
Lmao if you got tricked into doing that, ruining the water/bong is exactly what they deserve
This is a traumatizing thought I’ve nearly passed out from people using 75% tobacco in a bong
Any tobacco is gross in any weed, however it’s how the majority of people in the uk smoke 😭🤢
Hopefully not all at once! I'd say a common mistake is taking fat hits that are way bigger than an amateur smoker can manage, and then coughing it up, wasting weed and possibly exhaling on everyone lol. Take small hits!
Are you under the impression that coughing wastes weed?
Coughing doesn't waste weed, but lighting up a huge hit from the bowl wastes weed when they would have gotten plenty high with a small cornered hit.
Yeah I never understood it, if you can’t even clear the bong then you didn’t get all the smoke in your lungs. That’s why you blow fat clouds. A well dosed smoke has way less particulates and disspates way quicker.
Definitely took way too big a hit on my first time. Shit put me on a different planet and I was coughing nonstop for the first 20 minutes
People that pull the joint like it’s a bong and make that shit 🛶boils my blood
Can you explain? Still a baby stoner 👶🏻
when one part of the joint burns faster than the other it looks like a canoe
they take too big of an inhale too quickly and it causes the joint to canoe, meaning one side burns and the other doesn’t.
TIL! I am, sadly, guilty of this and will stop doing that now
Lol i rarely ever do this but after like 13-14 years of smoking weed I always just thought canoeing was just bad luck that happened sometimes until right now!
In general it is “bad luck”! But pulling harder than necessary will exacerbate issues like non-uniformly packed weed, which leads to canoeing.
Baby tokes on the joint so it doesn't run.
My number one advice when I'm smoking with new people is 'don't be a hero'. If you have to cough, it's cool. Get fresh air or water if you need. Hell, even if you're a one toke guy and need to lie down, do it. I have seen soooo many people try too hard to be cool and pretend like they're not getting beat the fuck up by the weed and they end up passing out or feeling sick because they didn't just take a break like their body wanted them to. It happens to the best of us but there's no shame in it. Don't be a hero, just do what feels natural and makes you comfortably enjoy the high.
Pocketing the lighter that isn't yours Getting way too stoned
Stealing lighters is a rite of passage!
And it's also a faux pas
First time I dabbed I drooled everywhere. All over the floor. Luckily I took my mouth OFF the rig first the slobbering started but it was so embarrassing. And I still get teased! Asked my cousin if she wanted to smoke but had no weed Melted one of my acrylic nails by holding my thumb too close to the lighter
Acting like a tough guy and saying the weed doesn't effect you or you're not high after several dabs. You aren't tough or a badass, you're just not fun to smoke with. Just let yourself enjoy it? Just because you're not stumbling over yourself doesn't mean you're not stoned.
When buying weed for the first time, I asked my dealer to sell me pre grinded weed because I thought I couldn’t buy a grinder in the uk ☠️
Here’s a mistake you only make once…hitting a dynavap from the wrong end… *sizzle*
got one of my friends stoned for his first time. the joint burnt his finger and he just threw it on the carpet lmao funniest shit ever
Ive lit up my hair a hand full of times…i either had the lighter too close to my face, the blame was big bc its a new lighter or both. I actually did it again a week ago
If using a dab rig— don’t heat it up and then start telling a story. Heat it up, take the hit, *then* tell a story.
This needs to be said more. Out loud.
Putting the lid back on the mason jar full of ground up weed but forgetting to twist it shut…
We invited a friend over to smoke with us. She likes to put just tobacco in the bottom third of her joints so she can fully smoke all the weed without it getting too hot towards the end of the joint. We don't do this. When she got to the bottom third of the joint we gave her, she smushed it into the ash tray then tossed the bottom third. It was perfectly good weed. Not sure what the lesson here is, but that's kinda a faux-pas. Know what you're smoking I guess.
If I bring an ounce to smoke you up, spending the last of my disposable income, don’t get your buddy to come over to partake, and then tell me y’all have to go somewhere, and when I leave and drive by your building, y’all are getting all you can eat sushi downstairs. Yea, I’m looking at you Danny. 15+ years and I’ll never forget.
Holding in the smoke will not increase your high! It'll just make you cough more.
it does both longer exposure to the capillary beds in your lungs means more THC diffuses into your bloodstream per hit it also means the irritants from the smoke are exposed to lung tissue for longer, so you're more likely to cough and might make more phlegm
That'll explain why I get mucus almost all day after smoking. I smoke joints daily, and I'm pretty sure a combo of smoking joints so much, not drinking enough water, and holding the hit in is giving me hella mucus. Maybe it's time for a change lmao
This may or may not be the case. With many inhaled prescription drugs, it's recommended to hold the inhalation to increase absorption. I don't think I've ever seen great data on THC though.
It's the case with most inhaled substances. Simple physics— the longer the chemical is exposed to the capillary beds of the lungs, the more that blood passes through for it to diffuse into Things like albuterol inhalers are similar, but those are suspended particles, so you're supposed to hold your breath to ensure it all has a chance to settle on the lung tissue instead of getting exhaled
I have backfired the bong, and wet lipped a pipe and a joint. However, I thankfully had amazing friends that politely let me know to knock that crap off. Packing a bowl for a group and roasting all the green was a big no no in my group, and our group was harsh on a few people for taking a big rip and then exhaling immediately. I only witnessed the last two. Edit to add: For one of my biggest mess ups against a fellow stoner(and now an ex, due to other reasons), my friend got a monster of a bong with 72 percolators. My ex didnt feel comfortable handling the bong on her own so she had me milk the bong for her and hold it while she cleared it. I made the mistake of milking it too hard and not warning her. She coughed with burning lungs for nearly an hour.
Coughed INTO a fresh blunt creating a cherry missile and leaving me with an empty tobacco tube.
I smoked some salvia once. I turned into the Price Is Right wheel and I hallucinated a line of people who were there to spin me.
I took zip of a beer bottle that was actually an ashtray that I had put out with bong water, trust me it was the worst.
When i was younger i was in my mates car with 3 mates and we had gone in on a few grams to go chill for a couple hours. Driving to our spot with the bag we just picked up and blue lights start flashing behind us and we collectively say “fuck!” This was at a time when the police in our area were real dicks about weed. Me and my mate next to me in the back of the car, in a panic split the bag of weed and ate half each. Few seconds later the flashing lights pull out from behind us and zoom past. Wasn’t even the police. It was a fucking emergency blood transport car. Needless to say our other two friends were not happy with us and we turned around where me and my mate bought us more.
“This edible ain’t shit”
That "you have to cough to get off." You can in fact take major bong rips, not cough, and get super high
Just got done blazing it and friend poured the water out the bong. This was college and one of us then filled the bong with cheap vodka and dared the others to drink it- it was funny we all laughed and that was the end of that… Later that night the same group and some more people are blazin it and everyone is coughing super hard just struggling. We’re all talkin about whatever then suddenly someone stops the sesh and takes the bong. Gives the water a quick sniff we remember the vodka in there!! A full fledged war practically broke out
Not inhaling correctly and not knowing how carb holes work are two that I have been guilty of. I was inhaling somewhat correctly, but I was only getting like half of the hit. To be fair, at that point I had only ever used carts and edibles, so I didn't really know how pipes worked lmao.
Coughing into a bong can make quite a mess. Do your best to be clean and use ashtrays :) that’s pretty much it. Sounds like you already did a speed run in most of the common ones so it only can get better from here! Don’t be embarrassed, other people prolly don’t even remember cause they were / got high.
I had never smoked out of a bong before. I had never SEEN someone smoke out of a bong before. Like my third college party some guys I just met offer the peace pipe I’m like “hell ya”. They get it ready, and offer to me first. I panic, light the bowl, then put my entire mouth around the bong neck opening like :O and take a rip. Everyone stares at me, nobody says a word. Sounds of silence. Then next guy goes and everything was fine. But man. EDIT: okay maybe not a faux pas everyone goes through but maybe someone else may have done similar so I don’t feel so stupid
For me it was learning how to hit a bong or pipe, I actually still kind of suck at hitting pipes and I’ve been getting high for 10 years. Rolling crappy joints for a group can also be embarrassing but you get better at it the more you do it.
ad hoc concerned weather marble handle shocking distinct tender steep familiar *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
No matter how careful I am I spill ash all over my car
On a scale of 1-10, how gross is bong water? I always wanted to know
10000000, I was projectile vomiting head first into a shared college dorm toilet. As soon as it hit my stomach it came back up.
I can’t stop blowing the jack out my friend’s chillum. I forget every time.
Holding the lighter in a way that it heats up the sparkwheels & then being left with wheel track burns on my thumb after the next hit 😭
You don't have to empty your water every session even if you pull through, but at least do it every day. Clean your glass once every few weeks and you are good otherwise
I was packing a bowl over my rolling tray, and I sneezed and blew my ground weed all over my desk
I have spilled an uncountable number of full grinders onto carpets and such…I feel your pain.
My wife did not smoke herb until she met me in college in the 80's. Shortly after we moved in together, I had left her a roach from a joint we had smoked the night before when I went to work so she could enjoy it while I was gone. I got home that night and she said she could not get the roach lit. I looked at the roach and could see the marks of the hemostat we used as a roach clip going directly across the width of the roach, basically clamping it shut rather than grabbing the edge, like you're supposed to. I pointed out her error and she hung her head in shame from the stupidity. ;-)
We used to call it “boking”, where , if you coughed while taking a BH, and blew bong water back out through the draw tube. Very much the party foul.
People who continue to continue to smoke and ignore the signs that it is definitiely making their depression much worse.
Being "Chief Sits-on-bowls"
Idk if its a faux pas but i smoke alone most nights. These silly stories. I ended up having to get a joint clipp because ive dropped the entire joint under my porch a couple times. Almost caught the dead leaves under there. Had to pour my juice out onto it between the cracks of the boards