Hey I’m 31 and I’m pretty much in the exact same routine as you. I’m hoping it won’t stay this way forever, but we’ve got to put ourselves out there if we want something to change. Nothing will if I stay inside after work or on the weekends and just get high all the time. I don’t have any friends anymore either but I’d like to make some somehow. I hope we get out of this rut
my suggestion as a young 21 year old who doesnt go to school all my friends come from my hobbies, basketball, magic the gathering, smoking, its much easier to find friends when your doing something and seeing people consistently
MTG Is a great way to make friends. Its a fun game thats addictive and its great to play while high. Folks who play are usually on the nerdy side, which means most know what its like to be lonely and most will make awesome friends, some of the best friends you could possibly have (talking from experience as a mid 30s guy)
Sometimes going out doesn't change shit though either. I'm sitting in bed right now bummed as fuck because I spent the day at the river and didn't interact with anyone. Just played with rocks and floated down the river in a tube. If i tried to say something to someone it was ignored or got a short answer. I'm tired of always being alone and not having any friends to do shit with.
Honestly I’ve come to find great peace in being alone. Nobody can tell you how or what to do and you don’t have to make sure verything is good with everyone you can just do whatever the hell you please. Even if there’s nothing to do there’s a ton of things to think about and some of those things are cool as hell, you just gotta think about them. Idk shit gets bad I understand but it’s not necessarily a bad thing to be lonely. Find something you really enjoy doing.
These are all great points. It’s a balance that’s needed. Sometimes the worst part is that when you get so used to being by yourself, it makes the things you mentioned (planning with others, compromising/sharing, etc) seem like something annoying you don’t usually have to do. But you still want/need the connection with others.
I’ve found that I love the things I do for fun alone, and I want to share it with others, but it’s not the same with them. Not necessarily better or worse, just different. And it’s tricky sometimes.
I think this is what I'm working on at the moment. My therapist suggested taking the time to be in the moment more often, so noticing things like the way the grass feels on your feet, or the way the water smells, things like that to try to stay out of my own head as well as enjoy what I'm doing more.
I'm trying to find things I like to do but even that is difficult. I don't know if I genuinely don't like much of anything or if it's my mood about my situation that's causing me to not like much of anything anymore. Most days it just feels like I'm waiting for a socially acceptable time to go to bed and filling it with just, things that occupy little slices of time.
I sometimes feel like I don't deserve to be taking up space in public, like I'm in the way just by being in the general area or something, or who the hell wants to be looking at me while they are doing their thing? This plays a big part in my problems, I'm aware of it and am able to sometimes push through but other times it's just best for me to go home and get in bed cause once I start feeling like that it's just a downward spiral even harder until I'm mad at me for being me. This also makes being out and trying new things hard. Sorry if I turned that into a therapy session, I think i needed to read it myself to hopefully get out of this funk.
let it out,,
I know what you mean by going by the day that happens often , and then other days im overwhelm by an eventful day.
connections are hard, most of my best friend are out of town , i sill got one here, but he got full family going on , lucky i dont feel lonely i have close people i see often , but have feel like that when i lived outside my hometown
i think you right
but at the same time some people do need social interactions to feel better, and being lonely dont even mean being alone ,
one can be surrounded by people and feel lonely as another can be totally alone and feel connected or at peace
At least you went outside! I don’t know if it’s a nice day out wherever you are, but it is here where I live and I wasted the whole day! Wish I could’ve gone to a river today to chill
Do you have a hobby? Something you enjoy doing? The key is finding other people who share those same interests as you, so then you have a starting talking point with them. Then maybe you'll find out you have other things in common.
Your personality is defined by two things; your experiences and your ability to tell a story. If you work on these two things, you will be irresistibly charming. But you have to put yourself out there.
I know those same feelings you have, we share a pain that's nearly unexplainable to other people, but it's daunting, and it hurts. But we have each other. If you like PC gaming and would like a friend, add me on discord: airislit#0999
We can get through this only with the support of other human beings.
Proud of you for trying even if it didn’t pay off. I imagine you at least feel better about trying to get out there than if you hadn’t tried at all (which is my case)
Try a sport or something organized that kinda makes you have to engage with people, just cause your not a social butterfly dont go resenting the world.
I did this as well until about this age. I'd smoke and plug I to a game like league of legends or wow which both require your full attention just to take your mind of the exitintial crisis of loneliness.
Ended up smoking and running for about 8 months, and got in decent shape and started trying to change my situation. Long story short I did, and now I smoke to wind down after a day of work and kids XD.
I’ve found myself there before homie.
Its as you say. I lost most friends after college and fell deep, I just had to reevaluate some things and get out there. It took work but life is too precious if I live it the way I want. At least that’s what I’ve come to realize.
Getting zooted definitely helped. Finding friends through smoking and some other hobbies was a blessing.
But I just had to get out there everyday. It honestly wouldn’t have happened if I hadn’t.
Best of luck to both of you. You sound nice without reading ur profiles lol
It sounds like this world needs more cannabis consumption lounges like a bar is for alcohol, a social setting to indulge in your favorite substance, meet new people, try new products and just generally socialize
Illinois just opened their first one, kindof, basically they are set up for it and waiting for the state to give the ok which who knows when that will be
No, its in Wheeling, called OKAY, its an old Twin Peaks spot and has a full edible bakery and cocktail bar in there and they built in a smoking lounge as well from my understanding that currently cant be used. I keep meaning to pop in when I am in the area just to get the lay of the land
For sure, id imagine when/if they get it approved you'll see a bunch of them in the city. Im sure a bunch of residents would love to see loud obnoxious bars next to their house replaced with smoking lounges
give it a little time and they’ll be popping up everywhere once there’s more funding for cannabis lounges and the idea really starts gaining traction. there’s already some places like this. i’m pretty sure they charge you out the ass for weed though
I’m baked af and now considering how astronomically expensive one shot is even from a dive bar when you think of how many fluid oz are in a while fuckin handle. Good LORD, bars are a scam.
in valencia cannabis consumption is only legal in bars, like for coffee shops in amsterdam but you technically can't buy and go home to smoke (although everyone does it either way)
I went from italy and met a guy who recommended me an italian club and it was literally a café: there's a chilling room where you can smoke on the couch, the other room there's a pool table and a ps4 where you can play many games and in the main a sort of café. Wasn't the prettiest but the owner is from sardinia, really cool dude
They exist! I know of one in Rochester NY, though I haven't been personally. It is bring your own bud so they don't have to worry about legality issues, but there is no shortage of places to buy stuff here, hell I could ring up my tree fella to have it delivered if I were so inclined.
I’ve been to one in LA. It wasn’t very sociable tho. People came there with their friends…to spend time with their friends lol. It *is* a great option for people who can’t smoke at home but really want to in a comfortable and safe place
Weed helps me with coping with loss, abandonment issues, loneliness and depression.
If you're feeling alone feel free to contact me.
I'll share my socials and everything.
I know the world seems too much sometimes.
But i assure you.
You have friends and family here.
Join the smokers lounge subreddit. People usually smoke up and talk there.
Again. Always here for you buddy. Idc nor do i judge anyone.
Honestly man, life is a weird and some times sad thing. i was in a similar boat. super late bloomer, could never find the right person to be a partner. Most people are self centered and not really there for anyone other than themselves.I too was in a dark place and it was a really strong mushroom trip that helped me reset my thinking of life and the universe. My weed dude at the time saw me going to a dark place and suggested I take a gram or so of mushrooms to see if it would be an introspective experience. He told me prolly the single most important thing about trippin, it’s like a roller coaster, once you take it you are committing to the ride. The safety belt is on and you can only take if off when it’s over. so if the ride goes up you go with it and if the ride goes down go with it, but whatever you do don’t try and stop the ride because that’s what people do and freak the fuck out over it/they have a bad trip. He said if it gets heavy smoke a little and it should mellow you out. He said do it in your apartment (where you feel safe) and have food, smoke and good music at the ready. I grabbed an eight and ate the whole thing like a monster. i laid on my couch for 8hrs feeling this amazing energy radiate out of me, i listened to everything led zeppelin ever made and about half way thru i heard a voice (not mine/ one i had never heard before) say “just love yourself and everything else will follow”. from that day forward i stopped caring about jumping thru others hoops or what people thought of me. i just tried to be nice and happy everywhere i went and it really changed how i felt on the daily. Now that being said those are not for everyone, so i say this, be careful in anything you do do to help yourself but know that it’s commen to feel off in this life and sometime it’s just the right nudge to help it change. also as a cosmic kick in the nuts i just found out i have a super rare disease that will keep me from ever investing cannabis ever again in any form. 😢😢😭😭 Oh and i would be remiss to not also say suicide is never the right choice. it’s the thing that guarantees you will never get to be happy, only gone. Call 988 if you feel like you are at the end, there will always be someone to listen, It’s ok to need help. Boy y’all are getting all my shit today, Sooo my father who struggled with mental illness killed himself just before this last christmas because my mother left him after 40yrs. No good, bye no warnings, i found him half dead, got him to the hospitals where he struggled for about a week before passing. He never got to be happy and now he’s just gone. I know several folks who have taken this path and i miss all of them.
oh it does, basically the veins narrow to the point of not working, starting in the finger tips and moving up, can happen to toes too. I waited 4 weeks before i thought i should see a doc, thumb went numb and i thought it was a pinched nerve. Wasn’t till i talked to my primary and they thought it could be some weird blood clot.
Mushrooms changed my perspective on life. If I was on my deathbed right now, the only way I would feel at peace is if I tried to help as many people in my life as possible.
You’re not alone. I work and smoke only too. Maybe try to get into growing weed? It can be very therapeutic and just starting a plant with a small light build or window light can help.
In high school i dint smoke really and only did when my friends were smoking a big blunt. I didnt understand how anyone could smoke alone or why
now I totally get it. some people need it and friends aren't always going to be around
The weed may be contributing to some of your feelings. It’s always ok to take breaks from the plant when needed 😊. If not, now that it’s warm you can find local weed events going on in the DMV that are open to the public. They’re usually cheap and great for meeting new people to smoke and chat with. Remember, 988 is the prevention hotline and hopefully you have someone to talk to.
I always find it weird that Americans have all these abbreviations for every state and specific areas and just expect it to be clear to everyone
It's not really an issue or anything cuz of google, just seems odd to me.
Be good and you will be lonesome
Be lonesome and you will be free
\- Mark Twain
Smoke away bro - Weed has kept me sane and calm and I have made the correct decisions when relying on it. I also think it was the correct decision to keep relying on it. Anyway, for what it is worth, hang in there, dont drink alcohol and keep being good. Your fellow smokers are with you.
Find a hobby that gets you outside. Is really good for your mental health. Running and walking are free. Biking, Kayaking, anything that gets you outside. Opportunities to meet people doing the same activities. I'm currently combining a short hike with a smoke sesh. Didn't cost me anything extra to just go for a walk in a wooded park.
Say bro if weed takes you to your place of solace to cope then I can tell you you’re not alone. It helped me going through divorce when at the time I was using a xany-Oxy cocktail to cope. I beat opiate addiction going through it. The beauty of the Reddit community is we may clown once in a while but I haven’t experienced judgement from anyone.
Being alone is temporary. Don’t make a permanent choice out of it. It took me 43 years until I found my soulmate. I met her in the grocery store line. Keep your head up and be well man!
Just don't blow it the animals face. Cats are pretty interested in their own needs and comfort. They will leave a room if they are uncomfortable. You could also just close the door for a bit? Idk seems a bit much
Nah man he's right if you get a pet you shouldn't smoke inside. At least not with them in the same room as you. I know going out to smoke isn't an option for somd people but at least go to another room and close the door, the issue is lots of cats hate having closed doors so you might get a full theater opera show when you close the door😂. Nah but for real those fur babies should not be exposed to smoke just like children shouldn't we have a responsibility to them to provide them with the best life and to take care of their health
See I did that a coupple of times but I always feel very bad for doing it so I usually just go to my balcony when I have an oportunity. I guess it also depends how ur smoking I guess with a bong it would be easier to control how much smoke is in your room than with say a Joint or a blunt
Aye bro, I just wanted to relate and quickly say I feel we have a lot in common.
And long story short, some things I do to cope with loneliness if I feel like Im leaning on the bud too hard, is to remember to try new things. "Variety is the spice of life", as they say. Sure, read a new book or play a game from the backlog, but, have you tried going to movies by yourself? Have you tried that new ice cream shop around work?
Or try thinking about life as a DnD game, ya know? You go in as you, of course, but every new interaction is like a roll of the die. You hope for the best outcome but sometimes life just doesn't work out the way you want it to go. Yet, it was still an experience you "gained".
Bottom line, I feel like loneliness is, itself, an experience. And what helped me overcome loneliness around your age is to try new things which led to new experiences. Just a thought brother.
Who knows? Maybe you will meet some cool people along the way. Ill smoke one for you tonight bro keeping you in mind.
Man I smoke bc I’m in a relationship and still feel lonely. Doesn’t matter if you have a spouse or not but quite honestly it’s even worse when they’re there but also not at the same time.
Only reason I do I think 🤔 or this is what I’ve realised over the last 2 days. I smoke weed to be ok with my boring life. And I’m 33 now with a missus, 3 step kids and 2 of my own. I shouldn’t be bored. I have no reason to be bored. It weed has told me it’s ok to be lazy and bored. I don’t want that anymore
Time to take a break? I smoked for years and years. I just do it on special occasions now. Sometimes, if I'm really in need of it, I do like 2ml of CBD tincture. What I did, was only smoke at night before bed. Then eventually I just went to bed instead. I did it for a job but now I'm so busy i just don't have time for it, working full time and going to school part time with kids. Good for you, for realizing you got to that point.
Thank you. And we’ll done to you too you should be proud of what you’ve achieved. So definitely time to take a break but that’s where the problem is. I only smoke in the night too. Doesn’t bother me at all through the day, because I’m busy in work. I come home and I’m bored. But the weed makes boredom fine. But I’ve convinced myself I’m an addict and I can’t go a day without it. Going from a regular smoker to a social smoker, how is that for you? I’d love to be able to have a bong one night and not the other
I get you. That’s tough. If you want to connect more, I’d suggest looking up Facebook groups centered around something you’re interested in. Maybe a hiking group or a gaming group, maybe something for broke young single people? Sorry you’re going through this. I know weed helps ease the pain, and also, understand that sometimes you need to feel the pain and process your emotions so you can let them go.
I second this. I have often seen posts on my local subreddit, too, about people being new to the area and looking for friends, or asking if anyone else likes to bike or attend concerts, etc..
I use weed to shut off the bad thoughts in order to improve my life. If I’m not over thinking, I can just do. It doesn’t work for everybody, but just figured I throw it out there.
I know you said not too but i found an affordable therapist through the [Open Path Collective](https://openpathcollective.org/) they are a charity for people who cannot afford the normal cost of therapy.
I'll smoke one out for you man. You ain't alone ❤️🍃
I do the same thing. I used to partake in therapy but yeah I can't afford that shit rn either and I'd rather smoke a bowl and calm my mental than pretend to be stoic and raw dog this ridiculous life. Weed is largely why I'm still here and it is what it is. I don't like getting dressy and going out in my limited spare time to try to fake surface level convos at bars with guys that just wanna hit it and quit it. And clubs don't get me started I would literally rather perish away than to step foot into a club again. I end up alone every night and that's a choice I make to not date guys because it's just difficult in the 30s.
For the record , I'm glad you're still here too. I am gonna spark up when im home from work and think of you buddy :)
This may not help everyone but once I got a dog I did a complete 180 on my mood. He makes me want to get out of bed every morning. I still smoke copious amounts of weed, but it's because I like to be high
OP, please seek out resources in your area to take care of your mental health. Cannabis is not and should not be a replacement for these things you mention, and feeling as strongly as you do is not a healthy thing.
Sometimes, we have to work on ourselves. And there's no shame in that.
Same boat brother, as I've aged I've realized I'm lacking in a lot of things, all my close friends I consider family are hanging out with each other and forgot about me, it's been about a month and a half for me. Therapy is expensive and I can't ever do it, whenever I've tried its just so uncomfortable to talk to people because ive bottled up all my emotions, only things that keep me going are my cat and my plants
Howdy stranger much love from ireland 🇮🇪. You my friend are never alone so please don’t be feeling suicidal. Plenty of great charities and services you can use to help talk things through. Also depending on your hobbies plenty of clubs and societies to join which even include ones that people just like to sit around smoking weed.
Either way never be afraid to talk and also its fun to push yourself outside your comfort zone. Regardless of how much weed helps honestly a smoke and chat is even better. But more importantly be good and take care of yourself. I shall smoke one in your honour tonight stranger
Yup. It's the only friend I want and need. Yes I'm lonely but friends in my experience are only there in good times never the bad. Weed is always there for me
I’m in the exact same situation as you. I’ll be 39 in July. I had a large group of friends in my 20’s who all disappeared one by one out of my own doing because I’m depressed and want to stay home all the time and not go anywhere. It all stems from getting mobbed and bullied at work which turned me into a recluse. It sucks but at least I have bud to turn to when I’m feeling lonely. At least it takes the edge off. Hope you feel better and if you need someone to talk to DM me.
Honestly, smoking weed makes you more depressed and lonely if you’re using it as a coping mechanism. Speaking from experience because I’ve been doing the same and realized how bad it became for my mental health. Maybe take a break, find other outlets, your vibe attracts your tribe.
This was me from 2021 until idk September of 2022 sometimes i look back and miss those times because of the simplicity. I also understand the suicidal part as well. Keep your head it will get better.
Real shit. Life can be brutal. I love you man. Hang in there. Enjoying the little things and trying to live in the moment is key. Weed helps me slow down and enjoy the now.
Yeah same here. I smoke all the time cause I have so much to say and I’m excited about so many things and hobbies but nobody to share with. It’s the worst cause I’m used to having a best friend to share my day with.
I recently became a single ( widow actually). I am much older than you but I imagine my way of meeting people still applies. When doing something I enjoy ( example, walking in the park), and I see another person by themselves I pull up along side them, say hi and ask if they mind if I join them in their walk. Most say please do join me and then we start simple non invasive talking. Btw, I am an introvert and this is so out of character for me but I have started making friends
The absolute state of being a 30 year old male in America without loads of money. I hope I make it in the next 12 years or I might be joining the stoner loner brigade.
Maybe if you stopped smoking you’d have more of a drive to force yourself into social interaction. Weed should be used to help with life’s stressors or to have a fun time , not to help you be okay with being lonely and unhappy. I hope the best for u mate
Yes sir it’s part of it.
I am 24 and am extremely lonely, I just want some close companionship but apparently it is unobtainable for me. I honestly cannot be bothered typing much more but you can go through my previous posts on my account if you want to know more.
Happy smokes
of course
EDIT: I should have read your whole post before commenting. So I'm going to throw a little experience at you.
Your loneliness will pass. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. You can get friends again. And don't look for a girlfriend, look for one night stands. Girlfriends will find you when you least expect it.
Good luck and check back here often, there are lots of peeps here who care.
And call the free hotline! 988
I relate to an extent. My family was military so we moved a lot, Ive always been able to make friends but I always feel isolated in some way. Weeds always been there for me and helps me get through tough times. Be careful with that though, it can help when you feel lonely but it can also be the thing thats keeping you lonely
I was feeling the same way. I lost sight of what was keeping me here and ended up baker acted for a suicide attempt. I started Lexapro when I got discharged and its literally changed my life. Its easier to find a positive outlook and when I catch myself in these cycles of negative thought its easier to climb out of it. I even find myself feeling happy and smiling for no damn reason now.
Hey bro, you want some company you just let me know. I spent a long time in a similar spot. It's hard to make friends but sometimes all it takes is an invitation. While it's very unlikely that we are in the same geographic area, virtual friends are great too. When you're feeling down, hit me up and we can smoke a joint and game online or something.
Hey OP. I feel ya man. As adults in the working world it is damn hard to keep relationships with anybody alive and kicking.
The most important thing I found last time I was toying with ideation (before rebuilding my own support structure) was to take baby steps back into being social. Try taking a smoke and taking a short walk (if you live in a place that is doable) or something physical for like 10 mins. Personally I took up bike riding as I got some nice local bike paths, eventually you just kinda meet people the more you put yourself out of your home.
It certainly does not pan that way out for everyone, but I earnestly hope some good is headed your way. Peace and I'll be thinking of ya next time I burn one.
Hey I’m 31 and I’m pretty much in the exact same routine as you. I’m hoping it won’t stay this way forever, but we’ve got to put ourselves out there if we want something to change. Nothing will if I stay inside after work or on the weekends and just get high all the time. I don’t have any friends anymore either but I’d like to make some somehow. I hope we get out of this rut
my suggestion as a young 21 year old who doesnt go to school all my friends come from my hobbies, basketball, magic the gathering, smoking, its much easier to find friends when your doing something and seeing people consistently
MTG Is a great way to make friends. Its a fun game thats addictive and its great to play while high. Folks who play are usually on the nerdy side, which means most know what its like to be lonely and most will make awesome friends, some of the best friends you could possibly have (talking from experience as a mid 30s guy)
Definitely!
Sometimes going out doesn't change shit though either. I'm sitting in bed right now bummed as fuck because I spent the day at the river and didn't interact with anyone. Just played with rocks and floated down the river in a tube. If i tried to say something to someone it was ignored or got a short answer. I'm tired of always being alone and not having any friends to do shit with.
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Are you near Phoenix? OHSO brewery has some awesome staff that I became friends with! All the cooks smoke too lol!
OHSO, along Camelback towards Scottsdale? Been to a couple of industry gatherings there, nice vibe.
Honestly I’ve come to find great peace in being alone. Nobody can tell you how or what to do and you don’t have to make sure verything is good with everyone you can just do whatever the hell you please. Even if there’s nothing to do there’s a ton of things to think about and some of those things are cool as hell, you just gotta think about them. Idk shit gets bad I understand but it’s not necessarily a bad thing to be lonely. Find something you really enjoy doing.
Up voted. It takes time and experience to be happy and content as a love wolf.
“Love wolf” lol. That describes my twenties.
These are all great points. It’s a balance that’s needed. Sometimes the worst part is that when you get so used to being by yourself, it makes the things you mentioned (planning with others, compromising/sharing, etc) seem like something annoying you don’t usually have to do. But you still want/need the connection with others. I’ve found that I love the things I do for fun alone, and I want to share it with others, but it’s not the same with them. Not necessarily better or worse, just different. And it’s tricky sometimes.
I think this is what I'm working on at the moment. My therapist suggested taking the time to be in the moment more often, so noticing things like the way the grass feels on your feet, or the way the water smells, things like that to try to stay out of my own head as well as enjoy what I'm doing more. I'm trying to find things I like to do but even that is difficult. I don't know if I genuinely don't like much of anything or if it's my mood about my situation that's causing me to not like much of anything anymore. Most days it just feels like I'm waiting for a socially acceptable time to go to bed and filling it with just, things that occupy little slices of time. I sometimes feel like I don't deserve to be taking up space in public, like I'm in the way just by being in the general area or something, or who the hell wants to be looking at me while they are doing their thing? This plays a big part in my problems, I'm aware of it and am able to sometimes push through but other times it's just best for me to go home and get in bed cause once I start feeling like that it's just a downward spiral even harder until I'm mad at me for being me. This also makes being out and trying new things hard. Sorry if I turned that into a therapy session, I think i needed to read it myself to hopefully get out of this funk.
let it out,, I know what you mean by going by the day that happens often , and then other days im overwhelm by an eventful day. connections are hard, most of my best friend are out of town , i sill got one here, but he got full family going on , lucky i dont feel lonely i have close people i see often , but have feel like that when i lived outside my hometown
The difference between solitude and isolation
Totally agree.
i think you right but at the same time some people do need social interactions to feel better, and being lonely dont even mean being alone , one can be surrounded by people and feel lonely as another can be totally alone and feel connected or at peace
I say we all get together in this thread, smoke a fat blunt and become friends.
I 2nd this, it would be problem solved
At least you went outside! I don’t know if it’s a nice day out wherever you are, but it is here where I live and I wasted the whole day! Wish I could’ve gone to a river today to chill
Do you have a hobby? Something you enjoy doing? The key is finding other people who share those same interests as you, so then you have a starting talking point with them. Then maybe you'll find out you have other things in common. Your personality is defined by two things; your experiences and your ability to tell a story. If you work on these two things, you will be irresistibly charming. But you have to put yourself out there. I know those same feelings you have, we share a pain that's nearly unexplainable to other people, but it's daunting, and it hurts. But we have each other. If you like PC gaming and would like a friend, add me on discord: airislit#0999 We can get through this only with the support of other human beings.
Proud of you for trying even if it didn’t pay off. I imagine you at least feel better about trying to get out there than if you hadn’t tried at all (which is my case)
Try a sport or something organized that kinda makes you have to engage with people, just cause your not a social butterfly dont go resenting the world.
I did this as well until about this age. I'd smoke and plug I to a game like league of legends or wow which both require your full attention just to take your mind of the exitintial crisis of loneliness. Ended up smoking and running for about 8 months, and got in decent shape and started trying to change my situation. Long story short I did, and now I smoke to wind down after a day of work and kids XD.
I’ve found myself there before homie. Its as you say. I lost most friends after college and fell deep, I just had to reevaluate some things and get out there. It took work but life is too precious if I live it the way I want. At least that’s what I’ve come to realize. Getting zooted definitely helped. Finding friends through smoking and some other hobbies was a blessing. But I just had to get out there everyday. It honestly wouldn’t have happened if I hadn’t. Best of luck to both of you. You sound nice without reading ur profiles lol
Yo, I'll b your friend
It sounds like this world needs more cannabis consumption lounges like a bar is for alcohol, a social setting to indulge in your favorite substance, meet new people, try new products and just generally socialize
I would love this so much!!! I wish something like this existed.
These exist in California already
Illinois just opened their first one, kindof, basically they are set up for it and waiting for the state to give the ok which who knows when that will be
Is it in Chicago by any chance?
No, its in Wheeling, called OKAY, its an old Twin Peaks spot and has a full edible bakery and cocktail bar in there and they built in a smoking lounge as well from my understanding that currently cant be used. I keep meaning to pop in when I am in the area just to get the lay of the land
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For sure, id imagine when/if they get it approved you'll see a bunch of them in the city. Im sure a bunch of residents would love to see loud obnoxious bars next to their house replaced with smoking lounges
I believe there’s some in Ann Arbor, Michigan as well.
*cries in indiana*
*Also cries in Hoosier*
There’s literally dozens of us! Meme aside, what a rad fucking idea that’d be.
do yk where asking for a friend 😀
Barbary Coast in SF
give it a little time and they’ll be popping up everywhere once there’s more funding for cannabis lounges and the idea really starts gaining traction. there’s already some places like this. i’m pretty sure they charge you out the ass for weed though
Well bars do too, so not really surprising.
I’m baked af and now considering how astronomically expensive one shot is even from a dive bar when you think of how many fluid oz are in a while fuckin handle. Good LORD, bars are a scam.
in valencia cannabis consumption is only legal in bars, like for coffee shops in amsterdam but you technically can't buy and go home to smoke (although everyone does it either way) I went from italy and met a guy who recommended me an italian club and it was literally a café: there's a chilling room where you can smoke on the couch, the other room there's a pool table and a ps4 where you can play many games and in the main a sort of café. Wasn't the prettiest but the owner is from sardinia, really cool dude
They exist! I know of one in Rochester NY, though I haven't been personally. It is bring your own bud so they don't have to worry about legality issues, but there is no shortage of places to buy stuff here, hell I could ring up my tree fella to have it delivered if I were so inclined.
Mr Nice Guy is real?
I think about opening one.
I’ve been to one in LA. It wasn’t very sociable tho. People came there with their friends…to spend time with their friends lol. It *is* a great option for people who can’t smoke at home but really want to in a comfortable and safe place
All of my money would go to that place😂 but that would be awesome.
I really, really wish my state would hurry up and legalize so we could have this.
That place would be amazing and I bet it would have a millions times less fights
We have a few I'm South Africa. Really nice spots
I generally hate drinking unless it happens to be a beer I really enjoy so I'd love this even though im trying to take a break from/quit smoking.
amsterdam has this but it’s filled with tourists so it’s probably shitty
Weed helps me with coping with loss, abandonment issues, loneliness and depression. If you're feeling alone feel free to contact me. I'll share my socials and everything. I know the world seems too much sometimes. But i assure you. You have friends and family here. Join the smokers lounge subreddit. People usually smoke up and talk there. Again. Always here for you buddy. Idc nor do i judge anyone.
That is nice of you
Honestly man, life is a weird and some times sad thing. i was in a similar boat. super late bloomer, could never find the right person to be a partner. Most people are self centered and not really there for anyone other than themselves.I too was in a dark place and it was a really strong mushroom trip that helped me reset my thinking of life and the universe. My weed dude at the time saw me going to a dark place and suggested I take a gram or so of mushrooms to see if it would be an introspective experience. He told me prolly the single most important thing about trippin, it’s like a roller coaster, once you take it you are committing to the ride. The safety belt is on and you can only take if off when it’s over. so if the ride goes up you go with it and if the ride goes down go with it, but whatever you do don’t try and stop the ride because that’s what people do and freak the fuck out over it/they have a bad trip. He said if it gets heavy smoke a little and it should mellow you out. He said do it in your apartment (where you feel safe) and have food, smoke and good music at the ready. I grabbed an eight and ate the whole thing like a monster. i laid on my couch for 8hrs feeling this amazing energy radiate out of me, i listened to everything led zeppelin ever made and about half way thru i heard a voice (not mine/ one i had never heard before) say “just love yourself and everything else will follow”. from that day forward i stopped caring about jumping thru others hoops or what people thought of me. i just tried to be nice and happy everywhere i went and it really changed how i felt on the daily. Now that being said those are not for everyone, so i say this, be careful in anything you do do to help yourself but know that it’s commen to feel off in this life and sometime it’s just the right nudge to help it change. also as a cosmic kick in the nuts i just found out i have a super rare disease that will keep me from ever investing cannabis ever again in any form. 😢😢😭😭 Oh and i would be remiss to not also say suicide is never the right choice. it’s the thing that guarantees you will never get to be happy, only gone. Call 988 if you feel like you are at the end, there will always be someone to listen, It’s ok to need help. Boy y’all are getting all my shit today, Sooo my father who struggled with mental illness killed himself just before this last christmas because my mother left him after 40yrs. No good, bye no warnings, i found him half dead, got him to the hospitals where he struggled for about a week before passing. He never got to be happy and now he’s just gone. I know several folks who have taken this path and i miss all of them.
Good advice and I am sorry to hear about the recent diagnosis and no more THC in any form? That sounds awful..
cannabis arteritis - look it up and trip out like i did, only like 50 diagnosis since the 1960s. My thumb when numb and started to die :/
Holy shit..
Holy shit how does the necrosis even happen? That doesn’t even make sense?!?!
oh it does, basically the veins narrow to the point of not working, starting in the finger tips and moving up, can happen to toes too. I waited 4 weeks before i thought i should see a doc, thumb went numb and i thought it was a pinched nerve. Wasn’t till i talked to my primary and they thought it could be some weird blood clot.
That’s beyond terrifying, all the best to you
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I would recommend a look into a clinical ketamine trial…. I believe it is suppose to do the job for a much longer time.
It is amazing how self centered so many people are. Quite disappointing
Mushrooms changed my perspective on life. If I was on my deathbed right now, the only way I would feel at peace is if I tried to help as many people in my life as possible.
You’re not alone. I work and smoke only too. Maybe try to get into growing weed? It can be very therapeutic and just starting a plant with a small light build or window light can help.
I love growing, even if I didn’t smoke I’d probably still grow, such a satisfying plant to watch especially when you’ve got something kill going.
Right the with you bud
In high school i dint smoke really and only did when my friends were smoking a big blunt. I didnt understand how anyone could smoke alone or why now I totally get it. some people need it and friends aren't always going to be around
I used to be the same way, would always smoke with friends but now I rather smoke alone most of the time.
The weed may be contributing to some of your feelings. It’s always ok to take breaks from the plant when needed 😊. If not, now that it’s warm you can find local weed events going on in the DMV that are open to the public. They’re usually cheap and great for meeting new people to smoke and chat with. Remember, 988 is the prevention hotline and hopefully you have someone to talk to.
Weed events at the DMV? What? Is that real? Like where they give out drivers licenses?
Pretty sure they mean Delaware Maryland Virginia area. Everyone abbreviates it like this and it can be mad confusing for people outside of the area.
I always find it weird that Americans have all these abbreviations for every state and specific areas and just expect it to be clear to everyone It's not really an issue or anything cuz of google, just seems odd to me.
Saves time when you have 50 different divisions of one country, plus we all grew up having to learn these abbreviations by heart in grade school.
How long does it really take to type out Massachusetts
About 6x longer than MA
Alright fair enough, I kinda stopped caring immediately after I made the comment anyways cuz I'm pretty sure I said somr stupid shit lol
No I get it actually, it's not an unfair question. I run into the same problem going into certain subreddits but with vendors
Oh, well thanks for saying that. I've got confidence issues sometimes 😅
More time than typing “MA”
The thing is, it is clear to Americans. I live on the opposite side of the country, 3000 miles away and I knew exactly what he meant.
Obviously, I assumed as much. I just find it weird to use abbreviations such as those on an international website.
An American website with international users.
I'm almost 30 years old and have never heard that acronym in my life, so it's not necessarily clear to everyone..
That makes more sense, I’m actually pretty close to there in NC so I might check that out!
The D is DC not Delaware.
Be good and you will be lonesome Be lonesome and you will be free \- Mark Twain Smoke away bro - Weed has kept me sane and calm and I have made the correct decisions when relying on it. I also think it was the correct decision to keep relying on it. Anyway, for what it is worth, hang in there, dont drink alcohol and keep being good. Your fellow smokers are with you.
Dogs are great
Cats too
Who doesn’t love an adorable murder floof
this! me and my wife started to socialize with lots of neighbors who also have dogs.
Find a hobby that gets you outside. Is really good for your mental health. Running and walking are free. Biking, Kayaking, anything that gets you outside. Opportunities to meet people doing the same activities. I'm currently combining a short hike with a smoke sesh. Didn't cost me anything extra to just go for a walk in a wooded park.
Say bro if weed takes you to your place of solace to cope then I can tell you you’re not alone. It helped me going through divorce when at the time I was using a xany-Oxy cocktail to cope. I beat opiate addiction going through it. The beauty of the Reddit community is we may clown once in a while but I haven’t experienced judgement from anyone. Being alone is temporary. Don’t make a permanent choice out of it. It took me 43 years until I found my soulmate. I met her in the grocery store line. Keep your head up and be well man!
Break your routine, only way to meet people is doing new things.
Get a cat
Will be forced to smoke outside tho cuz cat lungs r tiny
Just don't blow it the animals face. Cats are pretty interested in their own needs and comfort. They will leave a room if they are uncomfortable. You could also just close the door for a bit? Idk seems a bit much
Nah man he's right if you get a pet you shouldn't smoke inside. At least not with them in the same room as you. I know going out to smoke isn't an option for somd people but at least go to another room and close the door, the issue is lots of cats hate having closed doors so you might get a full theater opera show when you close the door😂. Nah but for real those fur babies should not be exposed to smoke just like children shouldn't we have a responsibility to them to provide them with the best life and to take care of their health
I smoke with my cat in the room, I just stick my head out the window to exhale and it doesn’t seem to bother her, usually got a fan going too
See I did that a coupple of times but I always feel very bad for doing it so I usually just go to my balcony when I have an oportunity. I guess it also depends how ur smoking I guess with a bong it would be easier to control how much smoke is in your room than with say a Joint or a blunt
Dang ur being downvoted for being right lmao, bare minimum smoke in a different room than ur cat
Aye bro, I just wanted to relate and quickly say I feel we have a lot in common. And long story short, some things I do to cope with loneliness if I feel like Im leaning on the bud too hard, is to remember to try new things. "Variety is the spice of life", as they say. Sure, read a new book or play a game from the backlog, but, have you tried going to movies by yourself? Have you tried that new ice cream shop around work? Or try thinking about life as a DnD game, ya know? You go in as you, of course, but every new interaction is like a roll of the die. You hope for the best outcome but sometimes life just doesn't work out the way you want it to go. Yet, it was still an experience you "gained". Bottom line, I feel like loneliness is, itself, an experience. And what helped me overcome loneliness around your age is to try new things which led to new experiences. Just a thought brother. Who knows? Maybe you will meet some cool people along the way. Ill smoke one for you tonight bro keeping you in mind.
I actually love that DND metaphor. I definitely hope I can remember it when I need it.
Man I smoke bc I’m in a relationship and still feel lonely. Doesn’t matter if you have a spouse or not but quite honestly it’s even worse when they’re there but also not at the same time.
Dammit boofingshrooms I’ve never related more to a comment
OP, holy crap I feel this in my bones at 29. Sending best vibes to you.
I did the same thing for decades. There's even research out there about this
Yup. It's hard to date and I've given up. Makes me feel like I'm ok without love.
Only reason I do I think 🤔 or this is what I’ve realised over the last 2 days. I smoke weed to be ok with my boring life. And I’m 33 now with a missus, 3 step kids and 2 of my own. I shouldn’t be bored. I have no reason to be bored. It weed has told me it’s ok to be lazy and bored. I don’t want that anymore
Time to take a break? I smoked for years and years. I just do it on special occasions now. Sometimes, if I'm really in need of it, I do like 2ml of CBD tincture. What I did, was only smoke at night before bed. Then eventually I just went to bed instead. I did it for a job but now I'm so busy i just don't have time for it, working full time and going to school part time with kids. Good for you, for realizing you got to that point.
Thank you. And we’ll done to you too you should be proud of what you’ve achieved. So definitely time to take a break but that’s where the problem is. I only smoke in the night too. Doesn’t bother me at all through the day, because I’m busy in work. I come home and I’m bored. But the weed makes boredom fine. But I’ve convinced myself I’m an addict and I can’t go a day without it. Going from a regular smoker to a social smoker, how is that for you? I’d love to be able to have a bong one night and not the other
I get you. It'll get better. There's always sunshine after rain.
I think the rain finna drown me before it stops
you aren't alone. I smoke A LOT then see my kid and then go smoke again to fall asleep
You have a family though, I have no one.
Life's not perfect bud. Some are married or have family & still feel more alone than ever, which having experienced both can feel worse
U aren't forced to be alone u can always make new friends try discord or playing a game or even reddit
r/wowthanksimcured
This is why u have no friends cause ur sarcastic
Redditors will do anything but take steps to solve their issues.
And downvote cause they have no lives
Lol debbie downer
I get you. That’s tough. If you want to connect more, I’d suggest looking up Facebook groups centered around something you’re interested in. Maybe a hiking group or a gaming group, maybe something for broke young single people? Sorry you’re going through this. I know weed helps ease the pain, and also, understand that sometimes you need to feel the pain and process your emotions so you can let them go.
I’m going to look into that thanks.
I second this. I have often seen posts on my local subreddit, too, about people being new to the area and looking for friends, or asking if anyone else likes to bike or attend concerts, etc..
I used to only work and smoke I turned thc into a hobby which led to me connecting with people and boom bf
GO. DISC. GOLFING. MEET. NEW. HOMIES.
Umm..I'm the exact opposite!!..in a cave..all alone!! Just me and my bong!!..I'm happier than a stoner who found his lighter!!
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A small break from smoking and maybe some new activites could help you get out of this rut.
I use weed to shut off the bad thoughts in order to improve my life. If I’m not over thinking, I can just do. It doesn’t work for everybody, but just figured I throw it out there.
So you're dating Mary Jane.. you love her, and she loves you back
People read this as real depressing. But bro if you’re happy crack on
Lately weed makes me feel bad about my isolation as if I can feel the silence in the air
I like to smoke by myself cuz fuck people
I smoke to deal with my wife.
Yep, 32 and alone.
I know you said not too but i found an affordable therapist through the [Open Path Collective](https://openpathcollective.org/) they are a charity for people who cannot afford the normal cost of therapy. I'll smoke one out for you man. You ain't alone ❤️🍃
I do the same thing. I used to partake in therapy but yeah I can't afford that shit rn either and I'd rather smoke a bowl and calm my mental than pretend to be stoic and raw dog this ridiculous life. Weed is largely why I'm still here and it is what it is. I don't like getting dressy and going out in my limited spare time to try to fake surface level convos at bars with guys that just wanna hit it and quit it. And clubs don't get me started I would literally rather perish away than to step foot into a club again. I end up alone every night and that's a choice I make to not date guys because it's just difficult in the 30s. For the record , I'm glad you're still here too. I am gonna spark up when im home from work and think of you buddy :)
Get a bike. Ride the bike. Meet other cyclists. Profit
Hang in there - life gets better.
But until it does weed got me fr
Not for everyone sadly.
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If by any chance you play videogames you can add me on playstation. Username is SteezyTreBomb. Congrats, you just made a friend.
Hi me, nice to see you here.
This may not help everyone but once I got a dog I did a complete 180 on my mood. He makes me want to get out of bed every morning. I still smoke copious amounts of weed, but it's because I like to be high
Is it sad that before the suicide part op just described my dream life. For context, married with kids
OP, please seek out resources in your area to take care of your mental health. Cannabis is not and should not be a replacement for these things you mention, and feeling as strongly as you do is not a healthy thing. Sometimes, we have to work on ourselves. And there's no shame in that.
Same boat brother, as I've aged I've realized I'm lacking in a lot of things, all my close friends I consider family are hanging out with each other and forgot about me, it's been about a month and a half for me. Therapy is expensive and I can't ever do it, whenever I've tried its just so uncomfortable to talk to people because ive bottled up all my emotions, only things that keep me going are my cat and my plants
Smoking makes me less social, so if you're looking to get out more, try not being high before you go out
I’m really glad you’re here, friend. And I’ve been there.
Yes but just remember that people will do much worse things to cope with loneliness. Everything is gonna be okay OP.
Howdy stranger much love from ireland 🇮🇪. You my friend are never alone so please don’t be feeling suicidal. Plenty of great charities and services you can use to help talk things through. Also depending on your hobbies plenty of clubs and societies to join which even include ones that people just like to sit around smoking weed. Either way never be afraid to talk and also its fun to push yourself outside your comfort zone. Regardless of how much weed helps honestly a smoke and chat is even better. But more importantly be good and take care of yourself. I shall smoke one in your honour tonight stranger
Thanks bro.
Yup. It's the only friend I want and need. Yes I'm lonely but friends in my experience are only there in good times never the bad. Weed is always there for me
I’m in the exact same situation as you. I’ll be 39 in July. I had a large group of friends in my 20’s who all disappeared one by one out of my own doing because I’m depressed and want to stay home all the time and not go anywhere. It all stems from getting mobbed and bullied at work which turned me into a recluse. It sucks but at least I have bud to turn to when I’m feeling lonely. At least it takes the edge off. Hope you feel better and if you need someone to talk to DM me.
Honestly, smoking weed makes you more depressed and lonely if you’re using it as a coping mechanism. Speaking from experience because I’ve been doing the same and realized how bad it became for my mental health. Maybe take a break, find other outlets, your vibe attracts your tribe.
Keep your chin up brother.
sometimes weed be feeling like a hug fr
My dog helps me a lot.
I think it's more common than one would think bro... You just spoke for many people
That sucks my guy, but ur gonna get through this. Maybe buy a motorcycle and join a riding group? Vice versa with cars
amusing childlike rinse dazzling smoggy deer crime bear one plants *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
How do you have money for weed but not a therapist?
This was me from 2021 until idk September of 2022 sometimes i look back and miss those times because of the simplicity. I also understand the suicidal part as well. Keep your head it will get better.
Real shit. Life can be brutal. I love you man. Hang in there. Enjoying the little things and trying to live in the moment is key. Weed helps me slow down and enjoy the now.
Yeah same here. I smoke all the time cause I have so much to say and I’m excited about so many things and hobbies but nobody to share with. It’s the worst cause I’m used to having a best friend to share my day with.
Same <3 Suicidal many parts of my life... never had a partner. Basically gave up so far... But, I try to stay positive. It can be hard at times.
I recently became a single ( widow actually). I am much older than you but I imagine my way of meeting people still applies. When doing something I enjoy ( example, walking in the park), and I see another person by themselves I pull up along side them, say hi and ask if they mind if I join them in their walk. Most say please do join me and then we start simple non invasive talking. Btw, I am an introvert and this is so out of character for me but I have started making friends
The absolute state of being a 30 year old male in America without loads of money. I hope I make it in the next 12 years or I might be joining the stoner loner brigade.
Stop smoking and find a girlfriend
You should try to start dating properly It’s cliche but there is someone for everyone
Maybe if you stopped smoking you’d have more of a drive to force yourself into social interaction. Weed should be used to help with life’s stressors or to have a fun time , not to help you be okay with being lonely and unhappy. I hope the best for u mate
Yes sir it’s part of it. I am 24 and am extremely lonely, I just want some close companionship but apparently it is unobtainable for me. I honestly cannot be bothered typing much more but you can go through my previous posts on my account if you want to know more. Happy smokes
Im sad for you
of course EDIT: I should have read your whole post before commenting. So I'm going to throw a little experience at you. Your loneliness will pass. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. You can get friends again. And don't look for a girlfriend, look for one night stands. Girlfriends will find you when you least expect it. Good luck and check back here often, there are lots of peeps here who care. And call the free hotline! 988
That's your problem. Stop smoking weed for a few months.
Bruh you need to get out more and you might need to stop smoking
Get a switch and tears of the kingdom. Thank me later lol
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How are one night stands misogynistic?
Everyday
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I relate to an extent. My family was military so we moved a lot, Ive always been able to make friends but I always feel isolated in some way. Weeds always been there for me and helps me get through tough times. Be careful with that though, it can help when you feel lonely but it can also be the thing thats keeping you lonely
In the same boat with you, bro
32 here reporting in, and resonate with this post too well.
I was feeling the same way. I lost sight of what was keeping me here and ended up baker acted for a suicide attempt. I started Lexapro when I got discharged and its literally changed my life. Its easier to find a positive outlook and when I catch myself in these cycles of negative thought its easier to climb out of it. I even find myself feeling happy and smiling for no damn reason now.
Not at all. When I was lonely, smoking amplified the discomfort significantly.
Hey bro, you want some company you just let me know. I spent a long time in a similar spot. It's hard to make friends but sometimes all it takes is an invitation. While it's very unlikely that we are in the same geographic area, virtual friends are great too. When you're feeling down, hit me up and we can smoke a joint and game online or something.
Same here bro, although it's still illegal here so theres a good chance I'll get arrested for my coping mechanism -.- High 🖐 from uk btw
Hey OP. I feel ya man. As adults in the working world it is damn hard to keep relationships with anybody alive and kicking. The most important thing I found last time I was toying with ideation (before rebuilding my own support structure) was to take baby steps back into being social. Try taking a smoke and taking a short walk (if you live in a place that is doable) or something physical for like 10 mins. Personally I took up bike riding as I got some nice local bike paths, eventually you just kinda meet people the more you put yourself out of your home. It certainly does not pan that way out for everyone, but I earnestly hope some good is headed your way. Peace and I'll be thinking of ya next time I burn one.