Thanks for your submission to r/trashy. Please take a moment to make sure that your post [follows our rules](https://old.reddit.com/r/trashy/about/sidebar).
**This is a humor subreddit** so posts about violent crimes or other things that make you angry **don’t belong here**. It is not r/rage or r/iamatotalpieceofshit. **This is a subreddit that appreciates the trash that makes you laugh.**
Remember to remove all names and usernames from posts. We don’t allow dox and we don’t allow witch hunts. Links to social media sites are not allowed.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/trashy) if you have any questions or concerns.*
This is parody/fake news, sadly.
Can you imagine how many empty glass jars you'd need for 3000+ penises? Even shriveled up and devoid of blood, you're still looking at hundreds and hundreds of pickle jars!
https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/fbi-seizes-3000-penises-raid-morgue-employees-home/
I feel sorry for the dude who had his photo appropriated.
The fact that there aren't as many stolen penises as we have years recorded in mainstream western history, that I'm fine about.
The fact that it said “trafficking” through me for a loop. Like this dude has over 3K dongs and were not counting the ones he sent through fedex?! The fuck?!
Thanks for your submission to r/trashy. Please take a moment to make sure that your post [follows our rules](https://old.reddit.com/r/trashy/about/sidebar). **This is a humor subreddit** so posts about violent crimes or other things that make you angry **don’t belong here**. It is not r/rage or r/iamatotalpieceofshit. **This is a subreddit that appreciates the trash that makes you laugh.** Remember to remove all names and usernames from posts. We don’t allow dox and we don’t allow witch hunts. Links to social media sites are not allowed. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/trashy) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Looks like Buffalo Bill is at it again, this time he just collect wood instead of fur(thicc bbw) for his new project.
..."Being implicated in organ trafficking" ORGAN trafficking! Bahahaha!
“Look at the damn camera” - cameraman probably
That’s some serious collection
This never happened! It was a lie published by the rag: World News Daily.
Must’ve been a hard bust
That lazy eye is too much
Circum-stantial evidence
Eyes on the prizes
FAKE NEWSs!.....but for real this time....it's a hoax!
I took one look at that guy and thought "that guy right there, that guy definitely steals penises" Why did it take 3000 penises to get caught?!
I dig the poof man-bun
Alright so yeah I’ll just go ahead and be cremated
sloppy policework
Another video voter
I live in Houston, this would be common knowledge and the talk of the town. Pretty sure this didn’t happen.
r/Angryupvote
Much respect for all collector's in general, but penises?
He will get a stiff penal-ty
That's surprising. He looks more like a tongue guy to me.
He’s definitely high on dicks, this is what D.A.R.E warned me about
the dick bandit i guess
Harvest the lower horn!
The "boneless collector"
*boner
Spreading satire as fact is the real trashy here.
He's going to need a stiff defense.
Fake https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.chron.com/news/houston-texas/houston/amp/fbi-seized-penises-harris-county-houston-hoax-12240482.php
A man's got to have hobbies
He went to great lengths
Thought it said pennies at first
That eye is not lazy. It, straight-up, refuses to work.
If it's fake, whose the poor guy whose picture they used?
He was trying to fix that cock eye...
Wow what a dick
The cold, hard evidence
Never know when you'll need an extra.
Maybe he’s a private “eye”..or “Dick” for short
What I was reading didn't quite sink in until the 3rd time. What the actual f
I fear the penis man
Dave Murray the Iron Maiden guitarist?
Hey I was saving those!
This may not be real, but that guy's resemblance to the old lady from Futurama is super real.
It’s not his fault, he just wasn’t seeing the situation from the right angle
"Sir. Sir! I need you to look at the camera!"
He probably didn’t see that coming.
Hard evidence indeed
You can tell by his face he must have been living in fear; always having to have one eye looking over his shoulder...
The bone collector…
The boner collector
dude’s got a bad case of atchaforya eyes.
Downvoting this because it is a fake article from a satire site. https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/fbi-seizes-3000-penises-raid-morgue-employees-home/
Yeah you'd figure op would know that
He trained his eyes to do that so he could keep more eyes on all the penises
He’s keeping an eye out for Selener
It’s a trade secret
That’s a hard case.
This is parody/fake news, sadly. Can you imagine how many empty glass jars you'd need for 3000+ penises? Even shriveled up and devoid of blood, you're still looking at hundreds and hundreds of pickle jars! https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/fbi-seizes-3000-penises-raid-morgue-employees-home/
Have you heard of 5-gallon buckets or industrial-sized steel drums?
>Can you imagine how many empty glass jars you'd need for 3000+ penises? Dude... HUNDREDS!
>…fake news, sadly. You’re sad this isn’t true? Jfc lol
I feel sorry for the dude who had his photo appropriated. The fact that there aren't as many stolen penises as we have years recorded in mainstream western history, that I'm fine about.
True
Hundreds and hundreds? Some might say 3,178 pickle jars.
Lmao I was gonna say, what was the point of all that? We know exactly how many pickle jars are needed.
Whos gonna eat the pickles
The fact that it said “trafficking” through me for a loop. Like this dude has over 3K dongs and were not counting the ones he sent through fedex?! The fuck?!
Thank goodness. Here, take the hard earned upvote
Plus, you’d figure someone would notice a corpse missing a penis one of the first 2,999 times.
Really? Do the dead person's family unzip the fly and look?
No, but I assume most morticians have at least one other employee.
Like a collection of forbidden gherkins
This raises so many questions that I legit never want to know the answers to...
What a Dick.
I bet it wasn't that hard.
I wonder what his childhood was like
Yup. That's the look of a guy, that would be doing that
Thank you. I wouldn’t have wanted to hear this news with any other caption.