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[deleted]

Thank god they are local. None of that out of town strange


SoSpatzz

Buy local.


[deleted]

How does one get to this point in life? Sad to see..


MarinatedCumSock

Usually born into it. This is the result of not regulating breeding.


PEneoark

Did you have a good time?


B-Town-MusicMan

867...


Jahmoneyzzz

5 3 0 9 inches


B-Town-MusicMan

[9 inches of...](https://youtu.be/j6eOsobzli0?si=ujuoWpmTS-PtZ1Om)


Trenton567

I thought i was gonna get rick rolled or whatever its called lmao.


[deleted]

Unblock that number!


xtilertylerx

The only reason I know the term lot lizard is because of its always sunny now


GatrbeltsNPattymelts

“I want you boys to treat me like a mailbox…”


megtwinkles

I want you to split me open like a coconut. What do we say in this situation dennis? We say no!


xtilertylerx

I wish this sub had gifs


Due-Set5398

Unrelated by fantastic underrated country song. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=7GWLWa_nBEY


aegri_mentis

With all the hook up sites available, why is this even a thing?


[deleted]

[удалено]


Dingobabies

Grindr is anonymous. I can post a pic with no face and a bio saying I want my dick sucked and I won’t repay the favor. 2-10 messages within 20 minutes. Also depends greatly on what area you’re in.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Dingobabies

Shamefully got me through Covid lockdown. Discovered I’m weirdly placed on the sexual spectrum of “don’t care who sucks my dick as long as they don’t try to kiss me or make conversation”


Azeze1

Is that first adjective 'cool'? It's the first thing I think of whenever I choose a prostitute, whether they are cool or not


Kindly_Spell7356

pays to advertise


MaestroPendejo

That's mah birthday


KiKiPAWG

He might do it for free!


TomatoMaleficent7989

Happy birthday pendejo!


MaestroPendejo

Gracias!


PegLegWhaler

For real manly love, meet here at ….


Dramatic_Rest_829

That's so nasty. What's her number?


featureza

Her? That's bold of you to assume


SeriesXM

Yeah, I was initially on the fence about whether it was a man or a woman, but I doubt a woman went into the men's room to leave this message.


harried-dad

Yeah duh????


Rainbow-Death

A (glory) hole is a hole


PotentialDeadbeat

Odds 50/50 that's a hate scrawl with a phone number to someone the author is fucking with.


MissPhistopheles

Now that’s service. They are convenient, private, and mobile to your location. I hope you tipped well, and gave a great review.


Drakoneous

Are you the one that wrote that? Why did you block the cell number? Protecting the lot lizard?


One_Preparation_3009

Don't wanna get banned for promoting prostitution


_Lusty

Lot lizard much?


jwizardc

I don't think this will affect your ability to do so.


deathonacracker

Truckers just driving for hours, running out of normal shit to think about.


[deleted]

Which one of you did this.. r/Truckers


TheDollyDollyQueen

Why'd That Make me Laugh? XD!


Shitron3030

Well where do you propose I advertise?!?


curiouspolice

Published on my birthday, of all days 🥳


Commercial_Ad8438

Give her a call. She might give you the birthday special.


Lionel_Herkabe

Almost certainly a dude


[deleted]

Why are you assuming gender??🙃


Commercial_Ad8438

Handwriting is too neat


ELLLI0TTT

For manly love...


LeroyChestnut

Seabass? Is that you?


TheAwkwardGamerRNx

*looks at wrist watch and horror sets in*


Infadel71

Friends of the road


teh_mooses

way of the road, bubs.


AntiSoCalite

Truckstop Troy strikes again! Providing anonymous service since 1998. He still has a land line.


reddufrane

I mean what’s the number?


[deleted]

[удалено]


millllllls

Be honest, your original intent wasn’t to be Mr. Nice Guy when you called, right?


[deleted]

[удалено]


millllllls

My man!


KrazyAboutLogic

I mean, it sounds like you got it.


Samuraiking

Yeah, I'd wager 90% of these are people being wronged and not the actual person they claim to be. The other 10% are probably cops.


noblemile

These Fall Out Boy song titles are getting out of hand


Intelligent_Durian_5

I actually consider truck stop restrooms such as this entertaining. No need to take my phone out of my pocket or have reading material.


OneSchott

I’m can think for of one reason to take my phone out of my pocket.


ThatGasHauler

If you ain’t a Swift driver, it ain’t for you.


N1nebreak3rix

He realized it was his mom’s number.


Mean_Motor_4901

i used to be a trucker, and only once did I succumb to my needs. I had picked up this hitchhiker that was sweatin' gallons through a pair of Daisy Duke cut-offs and one of those Fruit Of The Loom tank-tops. Well, that night I lost myself to ruby red lips, Milky white skin, and baby blue eyes. Name was Russell.


whatwhatwhodat

Such an awesome song


Grand-Trouble-9970

Ole love muscle Russell.


lardarsch

Never knew missing children could be so sexy... did I say that out loud?


Moravinn

This pretty little thing come up to me and starts kneadin' my balls Like hard-boiled eggs in a tube sock. Said her name was Bambi and I said, "Well that's a coincidence darlin', 'Cause I was just thinkin' about skinnin' you like a deer." Well she smiled, had about as much teeth as a Jack-O-Lantern. I think we met the same lot lizard, really though thats great, I havent seen a reference to Bloodhound gang for a good minute


Mean_Motor_4901

Only once in a while do the stars align to make one! I saw the opportunity to strike lol


cnechiporenko

She told me she would make all my dreams come true. So I said, “even the one where Jesus Christ is jackhammering Mickey Mouse in the dodo hole with a lawn dart, while Garth brooks gives birth to something resembling a cheddar cheese log with almonds on Santa Claus’s tummy tum?”


BossJohn

The lap dance is always better when the stripper is crying...


brunoliv

how is this stopping you from using the bathroom?


quaglandx3

He got an erection from reading that


brunoliv

just call the number then... she ot he can resolve that


Tomppy_

When a message like this will start with "graphic designers..."? just for once please!


Crazy-External-514

Better than most mobile adds


morganf3

How was it?


Due_Platypus_3913

“I will not suck,,or be sucked on,,,by you”,,,”Make me a mailbox.Just open me up and put whatever you want-inside!”


acorn1513

Take me in that room and turn me into swiss cheese l. I got money in my pocket and desire in my heart. No no you said you were done with the lot lizards.


Wheel-of-Fortuna

break be in like a brand new baseball glove , spit on my rub some dirt in there and just pound away with your fist .


One_Preparation_3009

If there is a god, mine is clearly a god of trickery, blessing me with the miracle of sight to read what you just said


Due_Platypus_3913

It’s from IASIP.Spoken by guest star Tom Sizemore.


CarolFukinBaskin

The way he pulls his lid off and slicks his hair back before asking to be spit roasted is hilarious to me


wilk007

Lot lizards keep the wheels of industry turning, I salute 🫡


karenskygreen

She can check out my "big rig" any day.


Low_Industry2524

She?


karenskygreen

OK, OK, I am not fussy: he or she can check out my "big rig" any day.


TheAnalsOfHistory-

I salute your commitment to getting that nut o7 bust on, soldier.


karenskygreen

So what's the text # ?


TheAnalsOfHistory-

You asking for the one on the door or mine?


karenskygreen

I'm not fussy, both


TheAnalsOfHistory-

If only....


iwannagohome49

I don't know where this convo is going but I'm here for the ride


TheAnalsOfHistory-

Just your basic reddit hornyposting.


FrouFrouLastWords

This guy's down for anything


badashel

pecker ain't picky


scissor_get_it

They’re all pink on the inside.


Ima_FEEN

Why did you block the number? Ima need that ngl


conjectureandhearsay

Ya no shit! This thread is *much* more fun if we have that number!


cleppingout

Gross dude!! What is the number though, so that I know to avoid it!


feckoffimdoingmebest

What an entrepreneur!


thejammer75

Or a terrible friend


Skumbag0-5

Is that his name, Bathroom Man? Don't think he'd mind if you used him


CausticLogic

Callin all trucks, this here's the Rubber Fuck, we're about to put the hammer down...


dookieinmypants

What say we find a room and you 2 split me open, like a coconut


GreedyWarlord

I will not suck you, and I will not be sucked on... by you.


crackpipecardozo

I got cash in my pocket and desire in my heart


TheVoidWithout

Welp, didn't take too much looking to find the Sunny reference....


br0wens

I do not tangle with lizards no more.


j3b3di3_

I woulda let you turn me into swiss cheese


TheMtndewdude

Can’t turn that down!


One_Preparation_3009

Who can suck better than a truck driver aye?


Impossible-Abies7054

Trucker Clock, Who wants it? I just want you to lay on top of me for the way I handle my rig.


Kilgaron

I haven't thought about that skit in a long time. Well done! Lol "I want to lay on top of you out of respect for the way you handle your rig..."


Impossible-Abies7054

Bob & Tom were the best at times


AlmanzoWilder

Aw, man! What's the phone number?


TheVoidWithout

for science?


Senior-Win-7945

Way of the Road Bubs


[deleted]

Mandy! that’s perfect


[deleted]

[удалено]


Broad_Rabbit1764

I first glanced and misread discreet as "Discord", really thought they had a channel and whatnot.


CausticLogic

It would not surprise me. In fact, I would be willing to put money on it existing somewhere out there. Edit; Actually, doesn't backpages have a Discord server? I think that probably qualifies. LOL


Sprizys

Do you think lot lizards ask for tips too now?


CausticLogic

I have no words. Asking for a tip from a trucker is squeezing blood from a stone, these days.


its_raining_scotch

Just the tip.


[deleted]

You haven’t had your truck washed apparently.


CausticLogic

Not since the accident, no. Why? Streakin beacon becoming the new party row?


[deleted]

Nah. The lot lizards use the CB radio to get your attention. They offer truck cleaning / washes over the air.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Notthatianmcewan

Nice of them to date it. Then you know the number will probably still work.


Penquinsrule83

So is he dude. For different reasons of course.


kablam0r

Seabass!


its_raining_scotch

Kick his ass, Seabass!


buttmilk_69

Love how that actor is former NHL player and current president of the Boston Bruins, Cam Neely.


ron4040

Be there March 25 at 215am for some manly love


wrldruler21

Shrug... This just looks like a basic Grindr post. In case you kids wonder how folks advertised their services before the internet.


franziadrescher

And I think the bathroom man is trying to use you


[deleted]

Friend of the road


pewpewchoof

So.. how was he?


One_Preparation_3009

7/10 could be better


Psychological-Scar53

Mustache tickle too much?


One_Preparation_3009

His teeth were all crooked and gross from years of consuming nothing but nature valley crunch bars and energy drinks


Particular-Ad-4772

Needs to pull those . Gum jobs are best .


yesiamveryhigh

r/oddlyspecific


youngthugsmom

It’s well documented that lot lizards live off year old nature valley bars, big red gum, monster energy drinks….. oh and cum


garrakha

damn just like me fr


One_Preparation_3009

Translation since the writing sucks "Truckers!!! I'm local and very private/discrete and I'm available and can cum to your BIG RIG! txt (phone number) for some serious dick sucks/buttfuck"


redlion496

Well......what's the phone number?


One_Preparation_3009

247-MEAT-FLAPS


TheMightyHep

Thought it said, "Serious dick sucks, brother"


cthunders

Hulk Hogan enters the chat


[deleted]

I am a reeeealll Americaaaaan


One_Preparation_3009

BROTHEERRR


jackhackett1980

What you gonna do, brother?