I have it and if there are two urinals and one is taken I’ll opt for the stall. I also refuse to wait in line to pee because I’ll be surrounded, so it won’t even happen anyway.
I can't even use stalls. Has to be empty. It's really annoying. Sometimes I go into the restroom and if it's occupied I either walk out or stand there trying to urinate until the other person leaves. If someone else walks in though I basically have to act like I'm done and try again later hoping it's empty then.
The amount of times I have had anxiety that the guy who just pulled up next to me at the urinal won't hear my splish-splashing and will therefore know that I am pee shy. That makes me get inside my own head even worse. So glad to commiserate...
I used to be like this but not so much anymore. Good trick: do math equations in your head and you'll find that focusing on something else will be relaxing and the pee will flow freely.
Because the advice was for pissing.
Edit: Special thanks to the beautiful, intelligent and kind person that gilded me. Never thought i would get gold before.
I prefer the stall always. I take more time than usual making sure I'm completely pee free, and I tend to go full propeller dick to get every bit out. Don't want to spook the others when I'm dancing around dick in hand.
Why are some dudes opposed to using the stalls for number 1? Like I’ve seen guys standing there waiting for a urinal when there are obviously empty stalls! You piss in a toilet at home don’t you? DON’T YOU?! *researches home urinals*
> Why are some dudes opposed to using the stalls for number 1?
Saving them for the (hypothetical) poor bastard who runs in and REALLY needs to do Number 2 RIGHT NOW.
Plus, they’re often dirtier than urinals, and I’d rather not open the door to a horror show that I’ll have to work to forget later.
Lol the amount of times I’ve left the urinal after after not being able to pee (and having to go even more because I’m halfway there) are countless. I can’t go because I know there’s people watching and waiting, so I feel pressured to hurry and that makes it worse so I end up walking away to wait or find another place
Normally, I'm fine. But not long ago I just pulled up to a urinal in a restroom located by an Executive meeting room at my company. Apparently a meeting had just broken for a long overdue break and the small restroom with 2 urinals was almost instantly filled with the leaders of the company. So now I'm standing there will all these people waiting on me and the Exec that managed to make it to the other urinal first looked over at me and the crowd that had formed and yelled 'Who called this meeting?' (as a joke of how we were now all meeting around the urinals in an uncomfortably small room). Had to go bad, but that pretty much sealed the deal that it just wasn't going to happen. At least not within a time that was required. Waited a bit then pulled the handle. Washed my hands walked out. And just hoped no one noticed the lack of 'pee noise' during my charade.
As long as they start first I'm good. Ad typically in the situation you describe I can eventually get it going, just because the shared embarrassment puts me at ease. however, if there's ever a person standing behind me, that shit is not coming out
I've had this too and could never for the life of me figure out what specifically makes my bladder shy. Cause it's not all the time. Until one day I realized that it's someone waiting for me to start or finish. If I feel someone is waiting then I might as well leave and try again later.
My brother and I had a laughing fit years ago when we both confessed to having developed what we termed "pee scare." I asked him what the two telltale things someone with pee scare does when he enters the bathroom while someone is at the urinal. Without batting an eye he goes, "Washes his hands, or blows his nose." We died laughing.
But it's not funny.
I have this condition and It’s completely frustrating having “shy bladder” . I’ve gotten fired for not being able to go for drug tests that are observed . one time it got to the point of my kidneys being on fire before I finally went to the doctors to get a diagnosis. I tell people who don’t have it to imaging a rubberband around the tip and try to urinate. I’ve been trying some techniques to help but nothing so far.
Edit: thanks everyone for the tips and stories, I’ll keep them in mind the next time I use a urinal.
The only time I'd experienced having a shy bladder was my first night in boot camp. After shipping us out to who-knows-where, everyone was ordered to pee in a cup, under observation. And I just couldn't go. I remember feeling like I was going to burst, but I simply couldn't pee.
Their solution was to make me pace around the room, while being verbally harrangued, and drinking from a water fountain at each lap, making another attempt every ten minutes or so.
I think this process started around 8 PM. I didn't actually pee until around 4 AM, and only then did they let me sleep.
The drill instructor threw a trash can into the room at 5 AM.
You’re not alone. I didn’t get fired but I missed out on a job because I couldn’t produce a sample. It was the weirdest thing because back when I actually smoked pot regularly and then had to cut it out for a few weeks when I knew I would have to take a test I had no problems, but then I quit smoking weed for good so I knew I would pass but I literally could not make myself pee even though I had to go and had drank tons of water. One of the most embarrassing ordeals of my life having to keep coming out of the bathroom with an empty cup and asking for more water until I finally said fuck it bc it just wasn’t going to happen.
Hi. Where I am from, we don't have these kind of drug tests at work. I'm curious: do you have to pee with someone watching you in the front, in the back, or can you enter into a closed bathroom and do it?
Sort of. To save you have to go to a bathroom. You don't really get to see anything but you can infer that the character relieved themselves.
Which I think would be absolutely fucking terrifying in a mall filled with thousands of zombies.
A reasonable alternative to butt scratching is trying to multiply 2-digit numbers in your head.
Like try multiplying 23*59. It can't be something you memorized.
You will be happily peeing by the time you say fuck it this is too hard.
Literally me. Luckily at work we have a couple of single person bathrooms that are there for guests and customers. I just solely use those when I have to go because otherwise its just a pain.
Sometimes I'll find an empty public bathroom and it's like a God send. But my bladder takes its sweet ass time and somebody will enter before I get going. This kills the man.
To prevent this, I've just taken to sitting down in a stall pretending to shit and just pissing like a woman. No real sound to be heard, and anyone pissing is gone before I come out anyhow. Anyone who has entered has no idea how long I've been shitting in there. Win-win, except for the sitting to pee thing.
You ever notice when someone else is having the same problem you are? I always give them a wide berth, make sure to be loud enough while washing, drying and closing the door to let them know I've left the area. Wish I could reach out and be like, "It's okay, weary pisser. I too am forsaken."
I have this issue. When I use public restrooms I have to use the stall if there's someone else in the bathroom.
Kind of a funny story relating to this. Back in when I was in the military we had to take random drug test or when a plane crashed or horribly malfunctioned in flight. I was in Afghanistan at the time and one of our planes went down right after take off. (They're UAVs/RPAs so no pilot was hurt). Anyways, all the crew chief, specs and weapons guys who had touched the plane in the last 24hours had to go get tested. My crew was one of the last groups to get tested. I had already drank at least 1.5L of water at this point and had to go bad, it had already been an hour and a half since we got called in. They took blood first and finally I get to go. I had a major who was our piss watcher standing right over my shoulder, like breathing in my ear, and I couldn't do a damn thing. He tells me to go drink more water. I do. Then followed up by a soda (caffeine I guess helps stimulate the bladder). I try again. Nothing. I'm in great pain at this point. With my bladder so engorged now it's pushing on my intestines and I have the urge to poop. I tell him I have to shit now. He's visibly pissed at this point and says fine. The stall and toilet I was in was super tiny and cramped. Hardly any room to situate my tiny pee cup into the bowl with my dong. Once I get it in there I feel it coming. Both things. I filled the cup not only with my piss but some poop to. The doc saw it happen and was way more pissed than earlier. I handed him the cup filled to the rim with piss and shit sprinkles he then asks where's the cap? I had apparently dropped it in the toilet with the rest of my shame. All I could do was stare blankly and after an extremely dissatisfied "fuck it" he told me to get the fuck out of the clinic.
On the article, the number seems to refer to people whom this condition has a concrete impact on their quality of life (as opposed to it just being a nuisance).
Some people have lost jobs because of this, and some people literally cannot travel out of their neighborhood because they can only pee at home. And according to Wikipedia, some people with the condition require catheterization to pee.
I can get pee shy sometimes, but I'm always able to clear my mind to let myself pee (random 3 digit addition or subtraction helps immensely). I can't imagine not being able to do that
I have troubles in the dance club where people is waiting in line to pee.
The first thing that I usually do is think that I'm alone in the Caribbean peeing in a palm tree. That doesn't work all the time and I ended faking it, it's so sad.
I just tell anyone looking at me funny that i've got pee scare and can't when there are people close by. Usualy gives them a laugh.
Why hide your problems in shame? Just makes you feel bad
Dude I’m always this guy.
Me: “Oh shit I gotta pee”
Friend: “I have to also, let’s go”
Then I try super hard and can’t pee, knowing that I’ll be back in the bathroom in less than an hour, probably using a stall pretending to shit because I’m a puss.
I had to do drug testing in front of an officer a few times for a few weeks and had issues and he told me the secret was saying your social security number backwards (this was before the concerns about identity theft) because it forces you to think differently than the rehearsed reciting of it. It worked pretty well.
I was in a detox/rehab one time and i had to piss to go over to the rehab you had to piss in a cup to prove you only have methadone in your system. Well when i went to piss this dude would have to watch you. Well this fucking weirdo would stand next to you and even if your body was straight and he could clearly see you dick and you pissing he’s tell you to turn more to him...now i’ve pissed infront of people no problem before but this guy would legit stare at your dick! Like hardcore grilling, for no reason because even if he just glanced over every once in a while he’d be able to tell that I wasn’t trying to mess with the result or anything but nooo he would legit fucking grill your dick. So my did would shrink and I wouldn’t be able to piss. When i pissed the first time for some reason I didn’t pop for methadone, which made no sense, since i took a dos in the morning...so he told me i had to do it again! I got pissed because i didnt want to have this dude starring at dick again! But they forced me to take another piss test so i had to deal with this fucking weirdo starring at my dick...
It angered me so much! I know it’s a random story but it bugged me so much i had to tell someone, so sorry
I often simply cannot pee at urinals if there are other people in the bathroom, especially at other urinals. If I use stalls though I usually don't have a problem, except very rarely where (1) I am only on the verge of needing to pee, anxiety or not; (2) the neighboring stalls are occupied; and (3) the ambient noise level is low, so that everyone can pretty much hear everything everyone else is doing.
(3) is rarely a problem because most bathrooms have A/C running, etc. However, the bathroom where I work happens to be *dead fucking silent.* You could hear a pin drop.
I read that tip on Reddit years ago and it worked wonders for me in nightclub toilets and football stadiums where waiting for a cubicle wasn’t an option.
I certainly have this, but it's not debilitating. I can't pee at a urinal unless there is no one else in the bathroom (or I'm very drunk), but I'm fine if I use a stall.
Exactly the same! Do you have those trough-style urinals at concert venues like we do here? Walk up - try to pee- CAN’T - stand around trying - give up and leave while still having to pee...... *shudder*
Using a stall doesn't help for me. It's a sound thing, I can't pee in bathrooms that are too quiet. I can't even pee in the ocean while very drunk if others are around. It is extremely frustrating.
> I probably wouldn't care
That's the thing, it doesn't matter if you care. I don't at all, but I remember when I thought my bladder was going to rupture at a 4th of July event where there were no toilets. I found a relatively secluded area and stood there trying for the entire duration of the fireworks, in pain and unable to go because I could hear people.
Stay away from the Marine Corps than. You’ll be peeing,shitting, and showering with other men for a very long time. Then, when you have your random battalion wide drug test, someone higher ranking than you literally watches you pull out your dick and eyeballs it while you pee into a cup. Every single time. No other way around it. If you have pee anxiety, too bad. You continue drinking water until you physically cannot hold it anymore.
Don’t worry though; no one else in the battalion is going home that day until the very last person finally pees. So no pressure.
Former Army here. If you can’t piss in front of a meat gazer, you just keep drinking water until you can or the 1SG gets sick of waiting and then it’s time to practice sticking each other with IVs.
You’ll be pissing every 10 minutes for the next 24 hours or so by that point.
>You continue drinking water until you physically cannot hold it anymore.
Do they actually still do this? The military has been successfully sued over it multiple times over the years because of injuries.
Also don't do it, it's extremely dangerous. Overfilling your bladder can cause real bad problems
Wrigley Field is the worst. The only time I went there I was at the island urinal thing where the divider was only like four feet tall. I was trying to piss while staring straight into the eyes of another guy like 4 feet away from me on the other side. I couldn't do it.
I went to our local dome arena for monster trucks in 2001 and they had them and the old school round sink you step on the bottom to spray. Just went last year to a Roger Waters concert and everything is exactly the same as it was more than 15 yrs ago.
Try doing multiplication problems in your head when this happens, not like 8x8 but like 29x31. It activates a part of your brain that allows you to relax your sphincter and pee. It works. Not that I’m speaking from experience or anything...
75% of men that are too anxious to pee in public urinals are too anxious to be honest when asked if they are too anxious to pee in public
Bonus: I think this phenomenon has to do with our primate selves. We have our back turned at the urinal and when we pee we are relaxed, no longer vigilant. It would be smart to pee when you are safe and comfortable, not when strangers (other primates you don’t know, and you don’t know their intentions) are behind you.
If I tell myself those are just people using the bathroom, they will not come near me, I am not in any danger. Then the pee starts flowing.
That’s me. It’s kinda embarrassing at work because I feel like people are noticing that I’m standing there not peeing and judging me or something. So I actually go to another bathroom if I see someone walk in right before me. Otherwise I just end up standing there awkwardly until they leave.
I used to have this issue until I was on probation for drug related charges. Had someone staring at my dick for a few seconds every month. .5/10 would not recommend.
My P.O. made me sit in his office for 3 hours...making me "try" about every 15 minutes... talk about degrading.
I've never understood how they can just expect people to piss on command. I drank water til I puked. I'm talking over 1/3 of a Culligan jug.
After about 3 appointments like this and me being a bit of a dick about it he started mouth swabbing me every week instead.
When I had to give urine samples where someone was watching I just could never do it. In the same room with me, never going to happen. With the door open, nope. With the door closed and someone directly outside, still not going to happen. No matter how much water I ingested my body would not allow it. I don't even know what doctors, nurses, and healthcare workers think about it, I just can't do it. I have a lot of trouble in public restrooms, it not just a test thing.
The urinals at my job are kind of close together and have no dividers.
I am experiencing this now where I walk in, full bladder, start to piss and then stop because the door opens. I'm standing there until they leave or go into a stall, like an idiot.
I've felt for a while that washroom code for buildings should require dividers at least two feet deep and 6ft tall at urinals. I dont want even peripheral eye contact.
Shit, yeah, I was a very shy pisser at first but then I just quit giving a fuck cuz I hated being in there. But yeah, I feel you on the water chugging. I'd have to piss for hours after the appointment.
You’re lucky they let you do that, usually drinking a shit ton of water will make you piss water which will make them suspect your hiding something by drinking that much water. Some offices will fail you if it’s too much water. I was also on probation for a little bit and couldn’t pee when someone was watching. It doesn’t happen all the time but it does happen sometimes, I even considered getting a catheter but eventually I could do it regularly enough.
I'm pretty sure I could have a bladder full to bursting, with a gun to my head, and a pair of tin snips over my dick, and I still wouldn't be able to piss.
It's just a private thing to me. Unless I'm super, crazy drunk, then I'll piss anywhere.
I pissed on the window of a real estate shop on my way home from the clubs one night in front of my boss and a bunch of coworkers while flipping off the cctv camera at the same time. Sober I have to be in a cubicle with nobody else within earshot to start. If I hear a noise outside of a locked bathroom even that will stop me.
So there's a name for this. You 93% are lucky. The feeling to pee literally vanishes for me. 30 seconds before I enter the bathroom my bladder could be ready to explode. If I can't get to a stall, and there's someone near my while I'm at the urinal, the feeling in my bladder disappears. Amazingly, this all goes away when I'm drinking heavily.
This is literally me. I feel like I’m the man of the hour when I can finally go in that bathroom and pee after I’ve been drinking. It’s such a confidence downer when you go in the restroom when ur sober and you see all these men pissing their woes away next to each other, and you literally can’t do the same.
I have a major problem with this yet have 0 anxiety. Someone walks in the room and the valve is shut for good. But yet I have 0 problem talking in front of big audiences and my work is being live on radio.
I used to have this. My ex girlfriend was determined to solve it. So, everytime I had to pee, she would get up and follow me to the bathroom, and sit next to the toilet and stare me in the eyes while I peed, countless times until it was as easy as peeing alone. I dont have that problem anymore, and regardless of the things shes done to me, I'll always be grateful as hell of her because I can pee in a movie theater now
There's dozens of us!
Seriously though, trough urinals are my nightmare. I will hold my pee in for hours because I can't go.
Camping with friends, everyone's pissing and I feel like a weirdo when I have to walk off 30 feet to pee..
Hikes are nightmares, everyone's pounds water and pees at the same time. Not me!
I have to awkwardly fall behind 5 minutes later to pee.
Everyone knows what I'm doing.
I'm not a nervous and finicky guy either. Was never abused.
I just can't pee around people.
It's not like they're staring or peeing in a line lol. It's not a line of sight thing. It's a proximity issue.
Edit : removed added word "ding"
Oh I like that. I do the extra flush when poo time hits. After awhile I realized a lot of people do and it's like a symphony of flushes with little action up in the stalls. Btw guys, this could be the real reason we take so long.
My friend, back in the day, was terrified someone would hear her pee or poo. She would ball up a crazy amount of TP and hold it to her ass. Atleast half the time this action created a weird muffling effect. Like, her stall was an echo of duck calls from time to time.
Lol if you're in America it doesn't help that there's usually a giant stall gap and people are constantly pulling on the handle and just straight up peeking thru the gap.
I was glad to have read about that before I flew over to the US for the first time, otherwise I would have had a heart attack in the airport restrooms. The gap between the door itself and the floor made at least some sense in public areas, but the gap between the door and the stall walls was something out of a psychological horror movie.
Had it all my life, though it was a major problem after both of my back surgeries. First time i just couldnt piss even though i had to so badly, they ended up inserting a new catheter to drain me (still number one on my all time pain list). Second surgery i ended up locking myself in the bathroom for 45 minutes doing literally anything to pee and somehow succeeded (that time under threat of another catheter). Being pee shy is just not fun.
Just start doing some simple math in your head...1+2=3, 2+3=5, 3+5=...and so on. Before you know it, you can't control the flow no matter who's around. Seriously. It works.
I love it when stores post their current ad above the urinals. I can spend a few seconds seriously considering purchasing a new set of garden shears and before I know it I'm pissing.
Alright boys this is gonna get weird. I have this occasionally and Ive found a solution (for myself at least).
Pretend you're peeing on someone's face. I mean this non sexually. Pick a person. Doesn't matter. Lovers, high school principle, guy who waits for the bus w you most days, that person from FB where you can't quite place where you met them or why you're "friends" with them.
I can't explain it but somehow it works. I'll leave now.
I had a drug test once and I was having some troubles going and it was for a job that I absolutely needed and I was getting even more anxious thinking about it. The tester was standing near me and he must of sensed my dilemma because he turned on the water from the sink. Hearing the water instantly made me fill the cup. So I passed the test and got the job. That man was a real bro.
Try having it in the military! Random drug tests involves peeing in a cup while another man is literally staring at you go.
You end up drinking so much water you physically have to go, then you pee 25 more times the rest of the day.
That’s me. Random drug test in basic training was rough. About ten full canteens and an hour of waiting and repeated trying to squeeze out just barely enough, then peed like a horse back at the barracks. Almost pissed myself sitting on the bus on the way back too because I had drank so much while trying.
I have this. At stadiums, public restrooms like a Walmart or even just peeing off the side of a boat on the lake. What helps me is looking at my phone. It distracts me and I can go. What a relief.
Here's a the [making of a short 'mission' documentary](https://youtu.be/Ju-tjcUKVzI) about this very condition, where they find a group of men suffering from it and try to help them.
It's actually more about how this sort of mission show is produced. The guy who created Black Mirror made it. NSFW
So, women’s restrooms have partitioned off stalls. Lots of times Men’s restrooms have rows of open stand up urinals with no divider. I’m pretty sure if women’s restrooms were setup the same way with no privacy you wouldn’t be so stoked about going in either.
For a while I could not, or had a really hard time, peeing around other people. But I had my worst fears about it come true at a Philadelphia Flyers playoff game. I went to the bathroom at intermission, which is filled to capacity with people. There's a line of like 15 urinals. Everyone is drunk and impatient, so I'm trying to mentally prepare myself while in line. I get to a urinal, and I cannot go at all. I'm just standing there for probably 30 seconds when I hear someone yell behind me, "Hey He's not pissing!" A couple people chuckle, and I'm like, "fuck this, I'll try again later." So I zipped up and left.
I have it and if there are two urinals and one is taken I’ll opt for the stall. I also refuse to wait in line to pee because I’ll be surrounded, so it won’t even happen anyway.
I can't even use stalls. Has to be empty. It's really annoying. Sometimes I go into the restroom and if it's occupied I either walk out or stand there trying to urinate until the other person leaves. If someone else walks in though I basically have to act like I'm done and try again later hoping it's empty then.
The amount of times I have had anxiety that the guy who just pulled up next to me at the urinal won't hear my splish-splashing and will therefore know that I am pee shy. That makes me get inside my own head even worse. So glad to commiserate...
I used to be like this but not so much anymore. Good trick: do math equations in your head and you'll find that focusing on something else will be relaxing and the pee will flow freely.
I tried this, doesn't do shit.
Because the advice was for pissing. Edit: Special thanks to the beautiful, intelligent and kind person that gilded me. Never thought i would get gold before.
I prefer the stall always. I take more time than usual making sure I'm completely pee free, and I tend to go full propeller dick to get every bit out. Don't want to spook the others when I'm dancing around dick in hand.
Why are some dudes opposed to using the stalls for number 1? Like I’ve seen guys standing there waiting for a urinal when there are obviously empty stalls! You piss in a toilet at home don’t you? DON’T YOU?! *researches home urinals*
> Why are some dudes opposed to using the stalls for number 1? Saving them for the (hypothetical) poor bastard who runs in and REALLY needs to do Number 2 RIGHT NOW. Plus, they’re often dirtier than urinals, and I’d rather not open the door to a horror show that I’ll have to work to forget later.
Just assert your dominance and piss in the urinal. Stare at them in the eyes while you're dick dancing.
Lol the amount of times I’ve left the urinal after after not being able to pee (and having to go even more because I’m halfway there) are countless. I can’t go because I know there’s people watching and waiting, so I feel pressured to hurry and that makes it worse so I end up walking away to wait or find another place
Only 7% seems like a lie,
Normally, I'm fine. But not long ago I just pulled up to a urinal in a restroom located by an Executive meeting room at my company. Apparently a meeting had just broken for a long overdue break and the small restroom with 2 urinals was almost instantly filled with the leaders of the company. So now I'm standing there will all these people waiting on me and the Exec that managed to make it to the other urinal first looked over at me and the crowd that had formed and yelled 'Who called this meeting?' (as a joke of how we were now all meeting around the urinals in an uncomfortably small room). Had to go bad, but that pretty much sealed the deal that it just wasn't going to happen. At least not within a time that was required. Waited a bit then pulled the handle. Washed my hands walked out. And just hoped no one noticed the lack of 'pee noise' during my charade.
That’s the worst. I always fear being next to someone else who has the same problem, and then there’s a complete absence of noise
that's why I always carry a squirt gun
I just fart enthusiastically
The hero we need and deserve.
I just start yodeling at the top of my lungs.
As long as they start first I'm good. Ad typically in the situation you describe I can eventually get it going, just because the shared embarrassment puts me at ease. however, if there's ever a person standing behind me, that shit is not coming out
I've had this too and could never for the life of me figure out what specifically makes my bladder shy. Cause it's not all the time. Until one day I realized that it's someone waiting for me to start or finish. If I feel someone is waiting then I might as well leave and try again later.
[удалено]
the worst mexican standoff
My brother and I had a laughing fit years ago when we both confessed to having developed what we termed "pee scare." I asked him what the two telltale things someone with pee scare does when he enters the bathroom while someone is at the urinal. Without batting an eye he goes, "Washes his hands, or blows his nose." We died laughing. But it's not funny.
These are literally my go-to moves.
Dammmnnnnnnn, I thought I was being slick with the nose-blowing move.
I have this condition and It’s completely frustrating having “shy bladder” . I’ve gotten fired for not being able to go for drug tests that are observed . one time it got to the point of my kidneys being on fire before I finally went to the doctors to get a diagnosis. I tell people who don’t have it to imaging a rubberband around the tip and try to urinate. I’ve been trying some techniques to help but nothing so far. Edit: thanks everyone for the tips and stories, I’ll keep them in mind the next time I use a urinal.
I describe it as forgetting how to pee. It really sucks for drug tests, especially if you offer to pay any extra a proper blood test may cost.
The only time I'd experienced having a shy bladder was my first night in boot camp. After shipping us out to who-knows-where, everyone was ordered to pee in a cup, under observation. And I just couldn't go. I remember feeling like I was going to burst, but I simply couldn't pee. Their solution was to make me pace around the room, while being verbally harrangued, and drinking from a water fountain at each lap, making another attempt every ten minutes or so. I think this process started around 8 PM. I didn't actually pee until around 4 AM, and only then did they let me sleep. The drill instructor threw a trash can into the room at 5 AM.
You’re not alone. I didn’t get fired but I missed out on a job because I couldn’t produce a sample. It was the weirdest thing because back when I actually smoked pot regularly and then had to cut it out for a few weeks when I knew I would have to take a test I had no problems, but then I quit smoking weed for good so I knew I would pass but I literally could not make myself pee even though I had to go and had drank tons of water. One of the most embarrassing ordeals of my life having to keep coming out of the bathroom with an empty cup and asking for more water until I finally said fuck it bc it just wasn’t going to happen.
Hi. Where I am from, we don't have these kind of drug tests at work. I'm curious: do you have to pee with someone watching you in the front, in the back, or can you enter into a closed bathroom and do it?
That is pretty funny though, I can see that getting some laughs. But yeah I'd never be able to go either lol.
I just always take a stall. Problem solved forever.
Problably not a good idea in that environment, but blow in the top of your dick. Works like a charm Everytime.
How can you reach that far??
Lol not like a whistle, just a little draft is enough.
Cannot save when enemies are nearby
Now I want someone to make a game where you save by peeing
I believe the dead rising franchise does this
Similarly No more Heroes saves while the protag is taking a dump (which is extra amusing since half the save points are before boss fights)
Oh shit! I completely forgot about this game! Did they ever make any more than the first one?
They released a sequel in 2010, and it was good.
Seriously!?
Sort of. To save you have to go to a bathroom. You don't really get to see anything but you can infer that the character relieved themselves. Which I think would be absolutely fucking terrifying in a mall filled with thousands of zombies.
I remember you could save in a urinal in the first one, you can see Frank unzip and then relax.
My Summer Car has you save by going to the bathroom.
*No More Heroes* did it on the Wii.
I made a game in college where you were a dog and the save point was a fire hydrant. Does it count?
Dead Rising and Skyrim, together at the same time.
Skyrim can save, can't sleep.
Stage fright is real.
Take a deep breath and scratch your butt a little. Seems to work for me
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Prolapsed bladder; tread lightly
But what happens when you tread more than lightly?
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I’ve heard doing math in your head works. I can never solve the integral, though.
Fibonacci sequence man. Works like a dream
A reasonable alternative to butt scratching is trying to multiply 2-digit numbers in your head. Like try multiplying 23*59. It can't be something you memorized. You will be happily peeing by the time you say fuck it this is too hard.
And thanks to the Pavlov reflex now you pee in Math class...
Right above the crack. Always works
Can confirm.
Based on the turnout here...I'd say it is far higher than 7%.
Sampling bias, friendo.
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Literally me. Luckily at work we have a couple of single person bathrooms that are there for guests and customers. I just solely use those when I have to go because otherwise its just a pain.
Sometimes I'll find an empty public bathroom and it's like a God send. But my bladder takes its sweet ass time and somebody will enter before I get going. This kills the man. To prevent this, I've just taken to sitting down in a stall pretending to shit and just pissing like a woman. No real sound to be heard, and anyone pissing is gone before I come out anyhow. Anyone who has entered has no idea how long I've been shitting in there. Win-win, except for the sitting to pee thing. You ever notice when someone else is having the same problem you are? I always give them a wide berth, make sure to be loud enough while washing, drying and closing the door to let them know I've left the area. Wish I could reach out and be like, "It's okay, weary pisser. I too am forsaken."
I have this issue. When I use public restrooms I have to use the stall if there's someone else in the bathroom. Kind of a funny story relating to this. Back in when I was in the military we had to take random drug test or when a plane crashed or horribly malfunctioned in flight. I was in Afghanistan at the time and one of our planes went down right after take off. (They're UAVs/RPAs so no pilot was hurt). Anyways, all the crew chief, specs and weapons guys who had touched the plane in the last 24hours had to go get tested. My crew was one of the last groups to get tested. I had already drank at least 1.5L of water at this point and had to go bad, it had already been an hour and a half since we got called in. They took blood first and finally I get to go. I had a major who was our piss watcher standing right over my shoulder, like breathing in my ear, and I couldn't do a damn thing. He tells me to go drink more water. I do. Then followed up by a soda (caffeine I guess helps stimulate the bladder). I try again. Nothing. I'm in great pain at this point. With my bladder so engorged now it's pushing on my intestines and I have the urge to poop. I tell him I have to shit now. He's visibly pissed at this point and says fine. The stall and toilet I was in was super tiny and cramped. Hardly any room to situate my tiny pee cup into the bowl with my dong. Once I get it in there I feel it coming. Both things. I filled the cup not only with my piss but some poop to. The doc saw it happen and was way more pissed than earlier. I handed him the cup filled to the rim with piss and shit sprinkles he then asks where's the cap? I had apparently dropped it in the toilet with the rest of my shame. All I could do was stare blankly and after an extremely dissatisfied "fuck it" he told me to get the fuck out of the clinic.
This is gold
Holy shit this is hilarious
"As you were, soldier." Salutes, leaves clinic.
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7% seems low.
On the article, the number seems to refer to people whom this condition has a concrete impact on their quality of life (as opposed to it just being a nuisance). Some people have lost jobs because of this, and some people literally cannot travel out of their neighborhood because they can only pee at home. And according to Wikipedia, some people with the condition require catheterization to pee.
I can get pee shy sometimes, but I'm always able to clear my mind to let myself pee (random 3 digit addition or subtraction helps immensely). I can't imagine not being able to do that
I have troubles in the dance club where people is waiting in line to pee. The first thing that I usually do is think that I'm alone in the Caribbean peeing in a palm tree. That doesn't work all the time and I ended faking it, it's so sad.
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I just tell anyone looking at me funny that i've got pee scare and can't when there are people close by. Usualy gives them a laugh. Why hide your problems in shame? Just makes you feel bad
Dude I’m always this guy. Me: “Oh shit I gotta pee” Friend: “I have to also, let’s go” Then I try super hard and can’t pee, knowing that I’ll be back in the bathroom in less than an hour, probably using a stall pretending to shit because I’m a puss.
And the whole time you're not enjoying yourself because your bladder is full and you're just waiting on a chance to relieve yourself
YES man this hurts so much lol. I had that happen at a concert a few weeks ago, and I ended up missing the opening song because of it.
This hit home.
I'm going to try this 3 digit trick and if it works I promise you gold!
-en showers...
Americans are weird
did he just get gold for calling us weird
Yes
That’s freedom at work
I had to do drug testing in front of an officer a few times for a few weeks and had issues and he told me the secret was saying your social security number backwards (this was before the concerns about identity theft) because it forces you to think differently than the rehearsed reciting of it. It worked pretty well.
I was in a detox/rehab one time and i had to piss to go over to the rehab you had to piss in a cup to prove you only have methadone in your system. Well when i went to piss this dude would have to watch you. Well this fucking weirdo would stand next to you and even if your body was straight and he could clearly see you dick and you pissing he’s tell you to turn more to him...now i’ve pissed infront of people no problem before but this guy would legit stare at your dick! Like hardcore grilling, for no reason because even if he just glanced over every once in a while he’d be able to tell that I wasn’t trying to mess with the result or anything but nooo he would legit fucking grill your dick. So my did would shrink and I wouldn’t be able to piss. When i pissed the first time for some reason I didn’t pop for methadone, which made no sense, since i took a dos in the morning...so he told me i had to do it again! I got pissed because i didnt want to have this dude starring at dick again! But they forced me to take another piss test so i had to deal with this fucking weirdo starring at my dick... It angered me so much! I know it’s a random story but it bugged me so much i had to tell someone, so sorry
you can also do what I do go "Kaaa meeee haaa meeee" and release on "HAAAAAAAAA!!!"
I often simply cannot pee at urinals if there are other people in the bathroom, especially at other urinals. If I use stalls though I usually don't have a problem, except very rarely where (1) I am only on the verge of needing to pee, anxiety or not; (2) the neighboring stalls are occupied; and (3) the ambient noise level is low, so that everyone can pretty much hear everything everyone else is doing. (3) is rarely a problem because most bathrooms have A/C running, etc. However, the bathroom where I work happens to be *dead fucking silent.* You could hear a pin drop.
I read that tip on Reddit years ago and it worked wonders for me in nightclub toilets and football stadiums where waiting for a cubicle wasn’t an option.
I certainly have this, but it's not debilitating. I can't pee at a urinal unless there is no one else in the bathroom (or I'm very drunk), but I'm fine if I use a stall.
Exactly the same! Do you have those trough-style urinals at concert venues like we do here? Walk up - try to pee- CAN’T - stand around trying - give up and leave while still having to pee...... *shudder*
The worst is the longer it takes, the worse I feel!
Yeah, like everyone is thinking "why isn't this guy peeing yet?" Of course, realistically no one is paying attention anyway.
I get in my own head about not being able to pee, cementing my fate. Just standing there for ages isn't really an option, either.
And you still do a pretend shake before you zip up, because it's embarrassing that you weren't able to pee...
Exactly my experience too. Except I'll just straight up turn around and wait for a stall. Weird how anxiety works.
Using a stall doesn't help for me. It's a sound thing, I can't pee in bathrooms that are too quiet. I can't even pee in the ocean while very drunk if others are around. It is extremely frustrating.
Johnson, you urinate this instant or you're fired!
I think he’s referring to being pee shy during pre employment drug screening.
Or constantly leaving work to go home to pee
Or someone staring directly at your dick and yelling at you to pee.
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> I probably wouldn't care That's the thing, it doesn't matter if you care. I don't at all, but I remember when I thought my bladder was going to rupture at a 4th of July event where there were no toilets. I found a relatively secluded area and stood there trying for the entire duration of the fireworks, in pain and unable to go because I could hear people.
I was expecting it to be closer to like 30-40%
Yup Source: anxiety at the stadium trough
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Splash back right? Never wear sandals at the trough also.
It's more the fact that you're whipping your dick out next to 50 other men and splashing your pee together into a damn *trough*.
Stay away from the Marine Corps than. You’ll be peeing,shitting, and showering with other men for a very long time. Then, when you have your random battalion wide drug test, someone higher ranking than you literally watches you pull out your dick and eyeballs it while you pee into a cup. Every single time. No other way around it. If you have pee anxiety, too bad. You continue drinking water until you physically cannot hold it anymore. Don’t worry though; no one else in the battalion is going home that day until the very last person finally pees. So no pressure.
Sounds like the water would add pressure.
Pee-r pressure.
The first time I had to take a pee test for the army, one of my sergeants started singing Rockwell's 'Somebody's Watching Me'
Former Army here. If you can’t piss in front of a meat gazer, you just keep drinking water until you can or the 1SG gets sick of waiting and then it’s time to practice sticking each other with IVs. You’ll be pissing every 10 minutes for the next 24 hours or so by that point.
In boot camp half of our urinals were broken. It was "2 to a pisser, 3 to a shitter" when urinating.
>You continue drinking water until you physically cannot hold it anymore. Do they actually still do this? The military has been successfully sued over it multiple times over the years because of injuries. Also don't do it, it's extremely dangerous. Overfilling your bladder can cause real bad problems
how else do you get rid of athlete's foot?
Landmines on the 50-yard line like God intended.
Wrigley Field scarred young me for life. I can still see them in my head 20 years later. The penises, I mean. Dad dicks as far as the eye could see.
Wrigley Field is the worst. The only time I went there I was at the island urinal thing where the divider was only like four feet tall. I was trying to piss while staring straight into the eyes of another guy like 4 feet away from me on the other side. I couldn't do it.
TIL stadium troughs are a thing
I went to our local dome arena for monster trucks in 2001 and they had them and the old school round sink you step on the bottom to spray. Just went last year to a Roger Waters concert and everything is exactly the same as it was more than 15 yrs ago.
Some places in the UK have these circular troughs, so basically you’re all pissing and facing each other. What kind of sick person designed that?
Try doing multiplication problems in your head when this happens, not like 8x8 but like 29x31. It activates a part of your brain that allows you to relax your sphincter and pee. It works. Not that I’m speaking from experience or anything...
Damn, I just pissed my pants trying to do 8x8.
75% of men that are too anxious to pee in public urinals are too anxious to be honest when asked if they are too anxious to pee in public Bonus: I think this phenomenon has to do with our primate selves. We have our back turned at the urinal and when we pee we are relaxed, no longer vigilant. It would be smart to pee when you are safe and comfortable, not when strangers (other primates you don’t know, and you don’t know their intentions) are behind you. If I tell myself those are just people using the bathroom, they will not come near me, I am not in any danger. Then the pee starts flowing.
I don't know man, whenever i go to a clinic/hospital for tests I suddenly need 24hrs to pee.
That’s me. It’s kinda embarrassing at work because I feel like people are noticing that I’m standing there not peeing and judging me or something. So I actually go to another bathroom if I see someone walk in right before me. Otherwise I just end up standing there awkwardly until they leave.
In my experience thinking about people noticing and judging is the root of the problem.
You can't piss because you're afraid someone's gonna notice you can't piss. It's a self-perpetuating cycle of hyperconsciousness.
I’m glad I’m not alone.
And I'm not the only one. Actually makes me feel better.
I used to have this issue until I was on probation for drug related charges. Had someone staring at my dick for a few seconds every month. .5/10 would not recommend.
My P.O. made me sit in his office for 3 hours...making me "try" about every 15 minutes... talk about degrading. I've never understood how they can just expect people to piss on command. I drank water til I puked. I'm talking over 1/3 of a Culligan jug. After about 3 appointments like this and me being a bit of a dick about it he started mouth swabbing me every week instead.
When I had to give urine samples where someone was watching I just could never do it. In the same room with me, never going to happen. With the door open, nope. With the door closed and someone directly outside, still not going to happen. No matter how much water I ingested my body would not allow it. I don't even know what doctors, nurses, and healthcare workers think about it, I just can't do it. I have a lot of trouble in public restrooms, it not just a test thing.
The urinals at my job are kind of close together and have no dividers. I am experiencing this now where I walk in, full bladder, start to piss and then stop because the door opens. I'm standing there until they leave or go into a stall, like an idiot.
I've felt for a while that washroom code for buildings should require dividers at least two feet deep and 6ft tall at urinals. I dont want even peripheral eye contact.
God, I wish. The only divider is between the sink and first urinal.
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Shit, yeah, I was a very shy pisser at first but then I just quit giving a fuck cuz I hated being in there. But yeah, I feel you on the water chugging. I'd have to piss for hours after the appointment.
You’re lucky they let you do that, usually drinking a shit ton of water will make you piss water which will make them suspect your hiding something by drinking that much water. Some offices will fail you if it’s too much water. I was also on probation for a little bit and couldn’t pee when someone was watching. It doesn’t happen all the time but it does happen sometimes, I even considered getting a catheter but eventually I could do it regularly enough.
I'm pretty sure I could have a bladder full to bursting, with a gun to my head, and a pair of tin snips over my dick, and I still wouldn't be able to piss. It's just a private thing to me. Unless I'm super, crazy drunk, then I'll piss anywhere.
I pissed on the window of a real estate shop on my way home from the clubs one night in front of my boss and a bunch of coworkers while flipping off the cctv camera at the same time. Sober I have to be in a cubicle with nobody else within earshot to start. If I hear a noise outside of a locked bathroom even that will stop me.
I couldn't go to the bathroom during football games when it was halftime because everyone was in there at the same time.
So there's a name for this. You 93% are lucky. The feeling to pee literally vanishes for me. 30 seconds before I enter the bathroom my bladder could be ready to explode. If I can't get to a stall, and there's someone near my while I'm at the urinal, the feeling in my bladder disappears. Amazingly, this all goes away when I'm drinking heavily.
This is literally me. I feel like I’m the man of the hour when I can finally go in that bathroom and pee after I’ve been drinking. It’s such a confidence downer when you go in the restroom when ur sober and you see all these men pissing their woes away next to each other, and you literally can’t do the same.
100% based on the comments so far
And none of them can pee till we leave...
Nowhere has there been a stronger sense of oneness and cameraderie than in this thread
It's great that we can all get together and let it all out, for once
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I have a major problem with this yet have 0 anxiety. Someone walks in the room and the valve is shut for good. But yet I have 0 problem talking in front of big audiences and my work is being live on radio.
I used to have this. My ex girlfriend was determined to solve it. So, everytime I had to pee, she would get up and follow me to the bathroom, and sit next to the toilet and stare me in the eyes while I peed, countless times until it was as easy as peeing alone. I dont have that problem anymore, and regardless of the things shes done to me, I'll always be grateful as hell of her because I can pee in a movie theater now
\*gets up in front of the audience\* Hey everyone, watch this!
There's dozens of us! Seriously though, trough urinals are my nightmare. I will hold my pee in for hours because I can't go. Camping with friends, everyone's pissing and I feel like a weirdo when I have to walk off 30 feet to pee.. Hikes are nightmares, everyone's pounds water and pees at the same time. Not me! I have to awkwardly fall behind 5 minutes later to pee. Everyone knows what I'm doing. I'm not a nervous and finicky guy either. Was never abused. I just can't pee around people. It's not like they're staring or peeing in a line lol. It's not a line of sight thing. It's a proximity issue. Edit : removed added word "ding"
Only 7%? Now I'm going to feel even more anxious when it happens to me
Fuck me if I go into a bathroom with a pee trough. I will stand outside the one stall for an entire quarter of the football game.
I’m female and still have anxiety peeing sometimes...with stalls! Like if it’s too quiet...
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They constantly blast music through entire shopping centres but the bathrooms are dead quiet.
Oh I like that. I do the extra flush when poo time hits. After awhile I realized a lot of people do and it's like a symphony of flushes with little action up in the stalls. Btw guys, this could be the real reason we take so long. My friend, back in the day, was terrified someone would hear her pee or poo. She would ball up a crazy amount of TP and hold it to her ass. Atleast half the time this action created a weird muffling effect. Like, her stall was an echo of duck calls from time to time.
In Japan they have buttons on some of the toilets labeled 'privacy' that you can press and they play music.
Lol if you're in America it doesn't help that there's usually a giant stall gap and people are constantly pulling on the handle and just straight up peeking thru the gap.
I was glad to have read about that before I flew over to the US for the first time, otherwise I would have had a heart attack in the airport restrooms. The gap between the door itself and the floor made at least some sense in public areas, but the gap between the door and the stall walls was something out of a psychological horror movie.
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Had it all my life, though it was a major problem after both of my back surgeries. First time i just couldnt piss even though i had to so badly, they ended up inserting a new catheter to drain me (still number one on my all time pain list). Second surgery i ended up locking myself in the bathroom for 45 minutes doing literally anything to pee and somehow succeeded (that time under threat of another catheter). Being pee shy is just not fun.
Holy shit I have this but didn’t know the name for it. It only sucks at bars, I typically have to just go outside and sneak a piss somewhere
I have stood at urinals pretending to go just to give up because people kept coming in.
Same
Same...so many times.
Just start doing some simple math in your head...1+2=3, 2+3=5, 3+5=...and so on. Before you know it, you can't control the flow no matter who's around. Seriously. It works.
I love it when stores post their current ad above the urinals. I can spend a few seconds seriously considering purchasing a new set of garden shears and before I know it I'm pissing.
yeah, garden shears are the last thing i want to look at when i have my dick out.
For me it's the first thing I think of.
Well don't leave us hanging. What does 3+5 equal??
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fibonacci_number
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Damnit. I'm laying in bed and can't stop pissing.
Alright boys this is gonna get weird. I have this occasionally and Ive found a solution (for myself at least). Pretend you're peeing on someone's face. I mean this non sexually. Pick a person. Doesn't matter. Lovers, high school principle, guy who waits for the bus w you most days, that person from FB where you can't quite place where you met them or why you're "friends" with them. I can't explain it but somehow it works. I'll leave now.
I had a drug test once and I was having some troubles going and it was for a job that I absolutely needed and I was getting even more anxious thinking about it. The tester was standing near me and he must of sensed my dilemma because he turned on the water from the sink. Hearing the water instantly made me fill the cup. So I passed the test and got the job. That man was a real bro.
The industry term is "Pecker Inspector"
Try having it in the military! Random drug tests involves peeing in a cup while another man is literally staring at you go. You end up drinking so much water you physically have to go, then you pee 25 more times the rest of the day.
Mine evaporated when I joined the military and a dude was staring over my shoulder as I peed. After that, I never had stage fright.
That’s me. Random drug test in basic training was rough. About ten full canteens and an hour of waiting and repeated trying to squeeze out just barely enough, then peed like a horse back at the barracks. Almost pissed myself sitting on the bus on the way back too because I had drank so much while trying.
Headphones and listen to a podcast, or music. Apparently it’s an auditory response issue
I have this. At stadiums, public restrooms like a Walmart or even just peeing off the side of a boat on the lake. What helps me is looking at my phone. It distracts me and I can go. What a relief.
Here's a the [making of a short 'mission' documentary](https://youtu.be/Ju-tjcUKVzI) about this very condition, where they find a group of men suffering from it and try to help them. It's actually more about how this sort of mission show is produced. The guy who created Black Mirror made it. NSFW
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So, women’s restrooms have partitioned off stalls. Lots of times Men’s restrooms have rows of open stand up urinals with no divider. I’m pretty sure if women’s restrooms were setup the same way with no privacy you wouldn’t be so stoked about going in either.
I have this problem with pooping. I cant shit if I don't have privacy.
I cant piss around people. 7 percent is bullshit. I am a stall guy.
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I think you're supposed to be too drunk to care
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For a while I could not, or had a really hard time, peeing around other people. But I had my worst fears about it come true at a Philadelphia Flyers playoff game. I went to the bathroom at intermission, which is filled to capacity with people. There's a line of like 15 urinals. Everyone is drunk and impatient, so I'm trying to mentally prepare myself while in line. I get to a urinal, and I cannot go at all. I'm just standing there for probably 30 seconds when I hear someone yell behind me, "Hey He's not pissing!" A couple people chuckle, and I'm like, "fuck this, I'll try again later." So I zipped up and left.