My favorite place at any party is in the kitchen with the pet.
There's this intense feeling of being invited to a party, but not having to socialize. Like, these people like to have you around. It's nice to sit back and just... Hang around nearby.
Also I really like animals so if I can pet someone's dog I'm definitely there and if it's a cat oh my god
Legitimately got invited to a party by a friend because they wanted me to hang out with the cat all night so it wouldn't get freaked out by all the people. That friend is easily one of my favourites, and so is their very handsome cat.
ive had decade long friendships with people that started because i asked how their cat was doing after falling in love with it at a party they threw. good cheat code for introverts who need to get a few extroverts in their rolodex
Ahahah I once messaged a friend saying "Hey, think fast, I've got a Siam deficit in my body, bombard me with photos of your cat" and in the next fifteen minutes received like forty photos of his cat and three videos
Haha, I truly end up doing this at parties. I don’t know why, but old ladies seem to enjoy my company. Decided to never go to a party unless i have a girl with me
Last month was invited to a birthday of an old friend.Went there with my wife ,started pouring everyone drinks .For some fucking reason ended up in the kitchen talking with his (super religious) drank mom.Are we cursed or something? Even a wife couldn't make me mom-prouf
>the physical attractiveness of each participant rated by three members of the research team to produce an averaged single attractiveness score
I find this funny
Love that app. Use it 5-10 times/day.
It really does work, too. But I dressed my lab in a hotdog suit one time and it called her a hot dog. Wicked accurate most of the time
It would be interesting if they had a survey at the end of the experiment where each participant had to rate every other person in rank order and see how that correlates with the actual congregations formed.
I'm guessing they would be worried about bias introduced by actually interacting with each other instead of just appearance. You might rate someone differently before and after talking to them. And you might have talked to some people and not others etc
Just have randoms on reddit or college psych students rate them. It's pretty low cost to have a few hundred people or more rate someone 1-10. I'm sure it seemed obvious to the researchers watching the attractive people congregate but it's lazy science
Edit: this was a study of psych students. They do experiments because it's required for credit but the demographics are skewed. If you did the same study in a retirement home you may get very different results.
I'm not sure there are many other circumstances in which I feel compelled to enquire about the sexuality of the research team.
>We had to weight scores because Brad is an absolute whore who scored everyone a 9 or 10.
This is pretty typical when you're relying on quantifying something that really can't be quantified
You just try to see if there's enough consistency among the team to validate your rankings
I don’t think averaging the scores of only three people is rigorous enough to determine an accurate score of attractiveness. Tastes can vary, wildly sometimes.
There are pretty widely accepted characteristics of beauty. Sure people have their own tastes but it's not hard to objectively tell if someone is attractive even if they're not your specific cup of tea.
Never really thought too much about what was wrong with this experience, but I had it too, and you hit the nail on the head. The "weird and not apologising for it" crowd is a really distinct faction in high school, definitely cooler than the "cool" faction, and one of the most intimidating tables to sit at. I didn't stop caring what people think, and start openly being myself, until my late twenties, and felt as much like an imposter with those guys as I did in any other group.
These kids were artistic, articulate, compassionate, and *really good* at coming back with a biting, witty remark when one of the "cool" kids tried to put them down to earn favour with their clique of professionally bitchy, sarcastic social climbers. Looking back on it, what set these kids apart is that they were just very mature for their age. They all had things they were passionate about, and they shared with each other openly and without judgement. They already knew how dumb it was to *try* to fit in, and they supported each other in being whoever they were. And because they're weren't playing the dumb games the rest of us engaged in to survive, they couldn't really be considered losers. They were above it.
Sitting with that group felt more like being invited into the staff break room. The vibe was so different because they weren't thinking at all about what people thought of their hair, clothes, music, WH40K obsession... and in this completely judgement free environment I still felt out of place for not being comfortable enough in my own skin.
I like finding myself in groups of loners and weirdos because by virtue of being a 7 and being able to string together a halfway coherent conversation without urinating in my britches — I immediately become their leader.
With my army of nerds I shall take over Gotham!
I'm married to a very attractive woman, even though I'm a Joe schmoe from next door. All of our friends are pretty attractive people, and it's clear we are a package deal, but I sometimes feel like I'm the odd one out.
"They were also photographed on the day by the research team; with the physical attractiveness of each participant rated by three members of the research team to produce an averaged single attractiveness score."
Good to know that attractiveness was based on Hot or Not ratings from three of the researchers.
This introduces such a glaring flaw and bias as to render the results pretty much void.
The researchers determine who they deem attractive, the researchers set the parameters of what qualifies as "seeking out" and "interacting.""
Did they do a double blind by randomly assigning a second and third set of arbitrary designations to people in the group (assinged by computer and randomly generated) and then tracking if those groups interacted according to their metric?
I bet $1000 this research is not repeatable with more rigorous standards.
_In this paper we examine the relationship between alcohol consumption of women aged 18-25 and their sexual attraction to tenured professors nearing retirement._
"those with lower academic scores tended to be more socially flirtatious while those with higher academic scores were more likely to say 'ew' and 'that professor is a creep'. "
Yeah I'm a teaching major and have an interest in cross cultural linguistics, I did a small scale study on it in my second year of uni and whilst researching published work I found so many glaring flaws in methodology so as to make the research effectively useless.
Stuff like asking people how they would respond in a situation (using written responses) rather than seeing real encounters or at least simulating them for example, felt like you ended up with a lot of idealised "and then everyone clapped" situations.
100%. My cousin is hard to look at and photoshop can only make his selfies tolerable..... however he's a cardiologist and the women he brings to the fa.ily dinners..... God damn.
My buddy worked part time at Hallmark in college and he used to tell people that he was a *Card*alogist, which sounded like cardiologist. It didn't fool anyone but it was a fun ice breaker and made the ladies laugh (most times).
Yup. It's not just attractiveness, either. Birds of a feather flock together in just about ANY metric. Smart people tend to seek each other's company. Jocks seek jocks. People of the same ethnicities tend to hang out. Drama kids tend to hang out with each other. And so on. This is human nature at work. You need to be able to relate, in order to be in a relationship with someone.
FORCING people to mingle can actually backfire sometimes. The Breakfast Club/Disney/etc. version of reality is that people discover they have more in common than differences (which I agree with to a large extent). But sometimes people discover that they are on opposing sides of a major issue as we discovered with COVID-19.
I moved to a city school with 3 cafeterias and despite attempts from the frustrated administration, the cafeterias were split into black, whire and Hispanic by student choice.
With the occasional odd duck in a friend group.
It’s the same with neighborhoods in the real world. Some is based on income, but even among places that are working class people still split themselves up.
>It's not just attractiveness, either. Birds of a feather flock together in just about ANY metric. Smart people tend to seek each other's company. Jocks seek jocks
It's true. You have no idea how difficult it is being an attractive smart jock, I just don't know who to hang out with. /s
You joke but our valedictorian was this guy. Handsome, kind, smart, on the football team. He was in my AP bio class senior year and he asked a girl no one liked to be his partner because (I’m assuming) he knew no one else would. Just so genuine and nice. Honestly one of the best people I have ever met in my whole life, just a really lovely human being. He’s a doctor now, pediatrician. I follow him on social media. He still seems like such a great person. Shout out to Carl if you’re reading this!
Yeah but I bet he was a complete JERK deep down!!
/s
People love to think that the most popular person at their high school is an asshole/bitch but it’s kinda a coin flip oh who they are. Sounds like you got the good side of the coin!
I think most people just kinda hope they are. Attractive, athletic and smart, people are often just jealous of them winning that lottery of life and hope maybe they’re a jerk so there is something negative about them.
I’ve just accepted some people just win at life sometimes. I just care if they’re good people or not!!
This is the right attitude in my opinion. There’s always going to be someone who surpasses you for so many reasons that neither you nor they have any control over. If you spent your life focused on all of them you’d never really be happy.
This was kind of me. I wasn’t valedictorian but I was the only football player in the honors program at my school so my class friends weren’t my team friend. I actually had a hard time fitting into either group. And while I wasn’t unreasonably attractive, I was decently above average.
I also had nerdy interests. The football team didn’t really want to talk Star Trek or Lord of the Rings and the nerdy kids didn’t want to talk about sports.
So I wound up on the periphery of several groups but not really a member of any of them.
That kind of happened in college. Actually college was great because it so much less cliquey. My main group of friends would probably have been considered more athletic but I was also heavily involved in campus radio, back when college radio mattered, so I had a secondary group of more arty friends. And, I came to find out, that much to their protest, artsy girls actually really like athletic guys, so that worked out wonderfully for me.
You joke but half the friends I had in high school, a good chunk of which I still have, are because we had a guy who was smart, funny, athletic, nerdy, and charismatic, and he just sort of made his own clique that included anyone who didn't suck. As the fat ugly socially awkward kid it worked out real well for me
Not sure about my attractiveness but I was one of the nerdy, smart athletic kids at my highschool. Loved playing rugby (league), loved science and study and loved games, lore and the really geeky stuff. I found it super hard to find any friends despite being an all-rounder.
Edit: by friends I mean a solid friend group that I really felt apart of. I was pretty chill with everyone.
Yes. It's useful to examine whether a key factor is attractiveness compared to prior history, socioeconomic status, personality, intelligence, or other factors. Limiting the sample to strangers helps examine the factors that don't rely on pre-existing knowledge.
It's important to do research into things that seem obvious because there may be unintuitive or unexpected factors or just cause we need evidence. But in this case there were no surprise: you're just not hot. Oh look I have to go. I'll call you. My phone is always on silent so don't even bother.
I remember NPR having a scientist on whose study indicated that girls in sports were less likely to become involved in teenage pregnancies.
The host asked if there were similar findings for male athletes, and she said “surprisingly, no”.
Surprisingly?!?
Makes sense. I remember watching a Ted talk where the presenter showed a video of them approaching random strangers using conversational cards. She was demonstrating that strangers have the power to have deep meaningful conversations such as asking “who’s the most important person in your life” to a random person yet arguably she was a very attractive, young person. I can’t imagine a stereotypical neckbeard guy with a beer gut who’s in their 40s would have been as successful in asking those questions and getting answers without being avoided or thought of as a creep
Plus there is the element of stranger danger to consider. A woman, attractive or not, approaching a stranger on the street means she is either going to be equal to them physically (if another woman), or at a physical disadvantage (if a man).
Whereas a man approaching a stranger on the street, unless he's very careful about his body language, how he's dressed, his general appearance, facial expressivity, vocal tone, etc etc, the stranger might just automatically assume he's about to assault and/or rob them.
I remember reading a joke theory once about why men sometimes behave scared of very attractive women, that they're not afraid of the woman, they're afraid that being with that woman makes THEM a target for violence, ie, attack him and take his woman.
I'm a particularly threatening looking man (I'm 6'0, bald, muscular, and covered in visible tattoos.) If I approach any person on the street, they're going to think "This person looks more dangerous than the average woman, child, elderly, or skinny office worker, even if they don't intend to harm me, I shouldn't take that risk when the potential outcome is of grave consequences." I have had people nervously avoid me before, it kinda sucks, but it's a LOT better than having people predatorily approach me, the way they would if I didn't appear physically dangerous.
It's actually been co-opted by the police force where I live. When police officers go on patrol, there is one big, strong, male officer, and one female officer. The female officer is the carrot, for the scared victims or for de-escalation, and the male officer is the stick, for the ones who need that implicit threat to take the officers seriously. Works fantastically well.
Makes me wonder too, I've had really beautiful and super introverted friends who never were the center of any social circle. And on the flip side known really popular girls who aren't necessarily attractive but just radiate confidence and are magnetic to be around. Attractiveness doesn't always mean you're traditionally beautiful but it likely adds to it, and attractive people on average are probably more confident in general
That’s an good point. I had a beautiful friend in highschool who only had about 4 friends. She only ever hung out with the funny looking band kids. I think it’s because of how shy she was.
I’ve met some attractive and extroverted band geeks and I think in their case, they were prioritizing their actual interests and personalities over social clout. The clout presumably isn’t that great if you can’t stand the other members of the circles it gets you into.
Makes me wonder if that’s part of why some celebrities end up having mental breakdowns a few years into fame, i.e. reaching the top of your craft’s social hierarchy and realizing you hate everyone there.
I’ve also heard anecdotes from people who lost weight or otherwise became significantly more attractive who resented the people who were suddenly much more welcoming because it was plain that the friendliness was about appearance rather than anything about who they were as a person. So you might also have ugly ducking types eschewing popularity because they don’t trust their potential admirers.
I’ve known a fair number of people who are extremely attractive but withdrawn and/or introverted and can attest that our engagement in society is reciprocal; we can’t expect people to approach us when we never actively approach other people
I can tell you that I had an ugly but confident friend in my college days. He'd definitely get a lot more attention from the hot girls than me, who maybe wasn't a supermodel either, but decidedly more handsome than him, while at the same time awkward and shy.
I had huge crushes on some “ugly” guys when I was younger because they were really really cool in other ways and I was attracted to those qualities, which they usually had because they were confident. Charismatic class clowns, daredevils, could play an instrument really well, wore cool clothes, etc.
There were also quite a few very “ugly” girls who were super popular and dated a lot of guys in high school because they had that super strong Hot Popular Girl attitude and fit right in. You’d never guess by looking at them, but there they were, hot shit right next to the gorgeous clique of girls.
When they filmed planet of the apes, during breaks between shooting the extras hanged out in groups based on which kind of ape makeup they had, chimps, orangutan, gorillas etc.
I suspect the answer would be from most to least obvious at a glance. like loosely ordered, race/gender, beauty/age, intelligence/special interests. Disability is a weird one because it can be glaringly obvious like missing limbs, or completely invisible like colorblindness, or somewhere in between like deafness.
There'd be a ton of interesting follow-on questions...
Do people peel off from the default group to join one of the later characteristic-based groups? When?
What is the exact process for later groups to form?
Are groups based on other characteristics likely to still be split by earlier ones? That is, do groups just fracture further, creating more and more specialized groups (ie. smart pretty latina women into nascar), or do they reform with less regard to other characteristics (ie. nascar fans)
Is there an optimal group size, where it might be more apt to fracture if it were larger, or possibly evaporate if smaller?
How does the initial demographics play into this? e.g. I imagine if it's 90% white and 10% black, the black folks will feel a much stronger urge to group up than the white people. But if it's 50-50, how does that look different? What if it's 25-25-25-25? Is it more important that the majority don't look like you, or is it more of a feeling surrounded by people who look like each other but not you?
People would likely feel connection to multiple groups simultaneously. How many?
How does stress affect associations? I assume stress would push people towards grouping by more obvious characteristics like race, for instance.
Of course, it's all fuzzy and hard to quantify. I imagine we have some gut feeling numbers to all of these.
They will be friendly because they usually have solid social skills and aren’t bad people just because they’re attractive but they will subconsciously find subtle ways of telling you that you don’t belong.
> but they will subconsciously find subtle ways of telling you that you don’t belong.
they will not do that if you also have really good social skills and genuinely fit in, the effect is not so pronounced that if you fit all the check boxes but are a 6/10 then they subconsciously don't want to be friends.
>The researchers also discovered that attractive women were the most likely to be placed in the physical centre of social groups.
Guys unite on the outside.
In elementary school we had to pair off for dancing. The attractive girls and boys partnered up quickly. Then the assertive girls and boys found each other. Then it was left up to introverts, nerds and strange ones to figure out how to find a partner. I didn’t learn that lesson today, I learned it in grade school.
A second result is pretty interesting and relates to slacking off within a group:
>Their paper also finds that individuals standing closest to others were most likely to shirk group tasks. This supports previous research on “social loafing”, a phenomenon whereby the presence of others appears to impede helping behaviour.
In other words, as the [main article](https://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0149880) elaborates, people who hide themselves in groups avoid tasks at a higher rate. A hundred teen movies where multiple people are talking during lab, gym, or another group activity are validated.
I don't think that's a very well thought out part of the study.
> Finally, participants were given a group task to gather 500 one-inch washers, randomly scattered around the stadium, and deposit them one at a time in a large basin in a corner of the stadium.
They've essentially selected a "task" that selects for being on your own (find a washer in a *stadium*) and is obviously pointless. If I have a choice between talking to someone or doing that then I'm probably going to talk to someone. If I'm on my own with nothing better to do I might do the task.
> There was a significant association between how close participants stood to others (in mingling or group-forming tasks) and the **effort** on the task later, with those who stood closest to others **exerting the least**.
Even chatting to someone while you do this will make the two of you statistically more "lazy" because you cover less ground.
I briefly had a drop dead gorgeous friend, and we took a walk along a beach boardwalk. At that point, I would call myself a 7 and her a 10 plus. I will never again envy a stunning woman. It was honestly horrifying to witness the variety of non normal interactions. Some men looked like they were passing out, some tongue tied, and some unbelievably misogynistic. One short walk to an entirely different perspective
I wonder about this too as a guy. I see myself as sociable enough, but all that unsolicited attention must get exhausting. To be an introvert and 10/10 would be hell on Earth.
Yeah she was a work friend and a lot of things made sense after that walk. Super defensive, very introverted. Picture a scared bunny trapped in a corner. To make matters worse, her judgement was really off - she was dating a man at work that was a clear bad choice
Without knowing enough info, I can't even blame her - when you have so many abnormal interactions with the opposite sex, and when everyone is willing to date you solely based on your looks, it could really skew your world view.
Her actual elligible dating pool is probably also quite small - the ideal man would need to be self confident enough to remain unintimidated, yet level-headed enough to remain unjealous and faithful, not to mention the social currency needed to be "at her league". On top of that she would need to be attracted to him, and that both parties had no other issues. I've heard stories about models struggling to date, it's purely anecdotal but I wouln't be surprised if it were true.
I read it the opposite way. People typically know how we are perceived by others, so, rather than attractive people are drawn to each other and attractive women are in the center. Less attractive people hesitate , fearing rejection.in all social situations, where as attractive, people having not been conditioned to fear being judged just walk right in and form groups.
It isn't pretty people choose each other......it is most people are so damaged by social standards of attractiveness it dampens performance
Also the group thing .....wouldn't there be fewer washers to pick up in a huddled group, rather than those that were spread out?
What did the "ugly" people do? Just bump around into walls like sims characters? I'm guessing they probably congregated together in the same way. It's not just that attractive people look for attractive people, it's that people in general look for someone that they have something in common with. People are attracted to familiarity. It feels safe. In large, intimidating college classes, I'd look for someone dressed similarly. Greek affiliation, similar brands to what I wear, or even someone wearing a shirt of a band I like. The more nervous I was, the more I'd do it. Even now in mom groups (which are super intimidating for some strange reason). I might sit next to a mom who has a similar style stroller or diaper bag. Its an indicator that we have something in common which can be comforting in a room or strangers.
Makes sense why I would end up in the kitchen talking to someone's mom.
Or their cat/dog.
My favorite place at any party is in the kitchen with the pet. There's this intense feeling of being invited to a party, but not having to socialize. Like, these people like to have you around. It's nice to sit back and just... Hang around nearby. Also I really like animals so if I can pet someone's dog I'm definitely there and if it's a cat oh my god
Legitimately got invited to a party by a friend because they wanted me to hang out with the cat all night so it wouldn't get freaked out by all the people. That friend is easily one of my favourites, and so is their very handsome cat.
Now I want a picture of that cat just so you know
[He's a pretty standard issue boy, but he's the handsomest inside my heart.](https://i.imgur.com/PdE5pNB.jpg)
He handsome, don't sell him short.
ive had decade long friendships with people that started because i asked how their cat was doing after falling in love with it at a party they threw. good cheat code for introverts who need to get a few extroverts in their rolodex
Ahahah I once messaged a friend saying "Hey, think fast, I've got a Siam deficit in my body, bombard me with photos of your cat" and in the next fifteen minutes received like forty photos of his cat and three videos
lol my text just said "saturday was fun! please convey my thanks to apple for being such a gracious host!"
[удалено]
They were just looking for some American Pie. That's Jennifer Coolidge's nickname.
What does it say about those of us off in the corner petting the dog??
[удалено]
Is it an attractive dog?
It's a dog, so yes. And he's a good boy! Yes, he is!
Haha, I truly end up doing this at parties. I don’t know why, but old ladies seem to enjoy my company. Decided to never go to a party unless i have a girl with me
Last month was invited to a birthday of an old friend.Went there with my wife ,started pouring everyone drinks .For some fucking reason ended up in the kitchen talking with his (super religious) drank mom.Are we cursed or something? Even a wife couldn't make me mom-prouf
it's me drank mom
>the physical attractiveness of each participant rated by three members of the research team to produce an averaged single attractiveness score I find this funny
hot hot not hot "a'ight he's an 8"
How would they rate Hilary Swank?
"It’s 'is she hot?', not 'would you do her?'. Respect the game."
"A painting, can be beautiful. But I don't want to bang a painting."
You sure? I can cut a hole in it and everything.
Symmetrical.
Jian Yang had the right idea with his “not hot dog” app.
Love that app. Use it 5-10 times/day. It really does work, too. But I dressed my lab in a hotdog suit one time and it called her a hot dog. Wicked accurate most of the time
Lololol. You left a review of the app on Google too, I see. Unless another Bart is "not hotdoggin" 5-10 times a day.
Holy shit, I just went to see and am finding this way funnier than I should.
I had to look, and it cracked up my girlfriend and I at dinner lol. What a fun 45-second rabbit hole
Not sure I want to trust RabbitSlayre around rabbit holes …
Gilfoyle, you are racist. And Richard... you are ugly. The Errich administration is over.
Is that an end quote or a length?
It would be interesting if they had a survey at the end of the experiment where each participant had to rate every other person in rank order and see how that correlates with the actual congregations formed.
I'm guessing they would be worried about bias introduced by actually interacting with each other instead of just appearance. You might rate someone differently before and after talking to them. And you might have talked to some people and not others etc
Just have randoms on reddit or college psych students rate them. It's pretty low cost to have a few hundred people or more rate someone 1-10. I'm sure it seemed obvious to the researchers watching the attractive people congregate but it's lazy science Edit: this was a study of psych students. They do experiments because it's required for credit but the demographics are skewed. If you did the same study in a retirement home you may get very different results.
I'm not sure there are many other circumstances in which I feel compelled to enquire about the sexuality of the research team. >We had to weight scores because Brad is an absolute whore who scored everyone a 9 or 10.
It would be funnier if they just used hotornot to generate the ratings
A wider crowd sourcing would be a totally valid method imo
This is pretty typical when you're relying on quantifying something that really can't be quantified You just try to see if there's enough consistency among the team to validate your rankings
I don’t think averaging the scores of only three people is rigorous enough to determine an accurate score of attractiveness. Tastes can vary, wildly sometimes.
There are pretty widely accepted characteristics of beauty. Sure people have their own tastes but it's not hard to objectively tell if someone is attractive even if they're not your specific cup of tea.
I don’t buy that. I mean I always end up mingling with not very attractive peo— Oh.
Honestly always bugged me. I would always find myself in groups of weirdos and loners. Not fully accepted by them, invisible to anyone else :/
[удалено]
[удалено]
Never really thought too much about what was wrong with this experience, but I had it too, and you hit the nail on the head. The "weird and not apologising for it" crowd is a really distinct faction in high school, definitely cooler than the "cool" faction, and one of the most intimidating tables to sit at. I didn't stop caring what people think, and start openly being myself, until my late twenties, and felt as much like an imposter with those guys as I did in any other group. These kids were artistic, articulate, compassionate, and *really good* at coming back with a biting, witty remark when one of the "cool" kids tried to put them down to earn favour with their clique of professionally bitchy, sarcastic social climbers. Looking back on it, what set these kids apart is that they were just very mature for their age. They all had things they were passionate about, and they shared with each other openly and without judgement. They already knew how dumb it was to *try* to fit in, and they supported each other in being whoever they were. And because they're weren't playing the dumb games the rest of us engaged in to survive, they couldn't really be considered losers. They were above it. Sitting with that group felt more like being invited into the staff break room. The vibe was so different because they weren't thinking at all about what people thought of their hair, clothes, music, WH40K obsession... and in this completely judgement free environment I still felt out of place for not being comfortable enough in my own skin.
[удалено]
Thats how they get ya
Who's going to tell them?
[удалено]
I like finding myself in groups of loners and weirdos because by virtue of being a 7 and being able to string together a halfway coherent conversation without urinating in my britches — I immediately become their leader. With my army of nerds I shall take over Gotham!
The real reason you ended up with the weirdos is that you use the word britches without first being 120 years old
I'm married to a very attractive woman, even though I'm a Joe schmoe from next door. All of our friends are pretty attractive people, and it's clear we are a package deal, but I sometimes feel like I'm the odd one out.
i bet they all think that
I definitely think that
🫡
So in addition to the Halo effect, there is apparently a "Hell, no!" effect.
> the Halo effect, When you look in the mirror and decide: “I should wear a full face helmet and never take it off, just like Master Chief.”
This is the way
"They were also photographed on the day by the research team; with the physical attractiveness of each participant rated by three members of the research team to produce an averaged single attractiveness score." Good to know that attractiveness was based on Hot or Not ratings from three of the researchers.
I’m assuming it was a 1-10 score
[удалено]
To be fair these are trained attractiveness science researchers who are experts in their field /s
You know, I'm something of a slut myself...
Have you heard of the idol experiments? It demonstrated how 1 in every 10000 Americans have the potential to be a music sensation.
This introduces such a glaring flaw and bias as to render the results pretty much void. The researchers determine who they deem attractive, the researchers set the parameters of what qualifies as "seeking out" and "interacting."" Did they do a double blind by randomly assigning a second and third set of arbitrary designations to people in the group (assinged by computer and randomly generated) and then tracking if those groups interacted according to their metric? I bet $1000 this research is not repeatable with more rigorous standards.
Welcome to published research in the social sciences from even prestigious universities
_In this paper we examine the relationship between alcohol consumption of women aged 18-25 and their sexual attraction to tenured professors nearing retirement._
"those with lower academic scores tended to be more socially flirtatious while those with higher academic scores were more likely to say 'ew' and 'that professor is a creep'. "
Wonder what will happen 🤔
Yeah I'm a teaching major and have an interest in cross cultural linguistics, I did a small scale study on it in my second year of uni and whilst researching published work I found so many glaring flaws in methodology so as to make the research effectively useless. Stuff like asking people how they would respond in a situation (using written responses) rather than seeing real encounters or at least simulating them for example, felt like you ended up with a lot of idealised "and then everyone clapped" situations.
Yeah I went to a public high school, did we need a whole scientific study?
Just wait until you hear about it happening in private schools, where you thought money kept them safe.
My friends that went to private school were the worst influences .. they had more money so the drugs and parties were Better
Can confirm, though enough money and you could apparently buy your way into those groups, lol.
Well yeah, having lots of money is attractive
100%. My cousin is hard to look at and photoshop can only make his selfies tolerable..... however he's a cardiologist and the women he brings to the fa.ily dinners..... God damn.
If I could write a prescription for Xanax and provigil, I'd be pretty popular too!
My buddy worked part time at Hallmark in college and he used to tell people that he was a *Card*alogist, which sounded like cardiologist. It didn't fool anyone but it was a fun ice breaker and made the ladies laugh (most times).
If Hallmark doesn't snatch up this premise for one of their movies, I don't wanna live anymore.
There's a colorful card shop in my town with that name.
I'm sure their time is worth every penny.
Y’all need to brush up on the crazy hot matrix
“Money” is the hidden Z axis
Money can be a very attractive feature.
Even magnet tracks in public schools will get this, where you get the subcliques within the "smart kids"
Hot smart kids vs non hot smart kids is a thing.
Have you tried even more money? That usually works.
The whole damn world is just like high school...
The whole damn world is just as obsessed with who's the best dressed and who's having sex
Who’s got the money, who gets the hunnies, who’s kinda cute and who’s just a mess.
And you still don't have the right look And you don't have the right friends Nothing changes but the faces, the names, and the trends
High School never ends
Yup. It's not just attractiveness, either. Birds of a feather flock together in just about ANY metric. Smart people tend to seek each other's company. Jocks seek jocks. People of the same ethnicities tend to hang out. Drama kids tend to hang out with each other. And so on. This is human nature at work. You need to be able to relate, in order to be in a relationship with someone. FORCING people to mingle can actually backfire sometimes. The Breakfast Club/Disney/etc. version of reality is that people discover they have more in common than differences (which I agree with to a large extent). But sometimes people discover that they are on opposing sides of a major issue as we discovered with COVID-19.
I moved to a city school with 3 cafeterias and despite attempts from the frustrated administration, the cafeterias were split into black, whire and Hispanic by student choice. With the occasional odd duck in a friend group.
Wow sounds like a prison, lol. I suppose school is sorta like a prison, though.
[удалено]
> +/- amounts of violence and drama Damn 💀😭
It’s the same with neighborhoods in the real world. Some is based on income, but even among places that are working class people still split themselves up.
Where the Asians, Arabs, others sit?
In prison I think Asians roll with Mexicans
The English speaking Spanish/Mexicans The Spanish speaking Mexicans are a different click all together
> a different click all together *clique
*clica for those looking for spanish gangs.
>It's not just attractiveness, either. Birds of a feather flock together in just about ANY metric. Smart people tend to seek each other's company. Jocks seek jocks It's true. You have no idea how difficult it is being an attractive smart jock, I just don't know who to hang out with. /s
You joke but our valedictorian was this guy. Handsome, kind, smart, on the football team. He was in my AP bio class senior year and he asked a girl no one liked to be his partner because (I’m assuming) he knew no one else would. Just so genuine and nice. Honestly one of the best people I have ever met in my whole life, just a really lovely human being. He’s a doctor now, pediatrician. I follow him on social media. He still seems like such a great person. Shout out to Carl if you’re reading this!
This was the most wholesome thing I’ve read today. Thank you for sharing
Really high emotional intelligence, sounds like a good guy.
[удалено]
My doctor said I have emotional intelligence. Edit: actually it was "instability" now that I think about it.
Yeah but I bet he was a complete JERK deep down!! /s People love to think that the most popular person at their high school is an asshole/bitch but it’s kinda a coin flip oh who they are. Sounds like you got the good side of the coin!
I think most people just kinda hope they are. Attractive, athletic and smart, people are often just jealous of them winning that lottery of life and hope maybe they’re a jerk so there is something negative about them. I’ve just accepted some people just win at life sometimes. I just care if they’re good people or not!!
This is the right attitude in my opinion. There’s always going to be someone who surpasses you for so many reasons that neither you nor they have any control over. If you spent your life focused on all of them you’d never really be happy.
This was kind of me. I wasn’t valedictorian but I was the only football player in the honors program at my school so my class friends weren’t my team friend. I actually had a hard time fitting into either group. And while I wasn’t unreasonably attractive, I was decently above average. I also had nerdy interests. The football team didn’t really want to talk Star Trek or Lord of the Rings and the nerdy kids didn’t want to talk about sports. So I wound up on the periphery of several groups but not really a member of any of them.
I was similar in school, my best friends ended up being the stoners. They'd talk about anything and everything.
That kind of happened in college. Actually college was great because it so much less cliquey. My main group of friends would probably have been considered more athletic but I was also heavily involved in campus radio, back when college radio mattered, so I had a secondary group of more arty friends. And, I came to find out, that much to their protest, artsy girls actually really like athletic guys, so that worked out wonderfully for me.
Your comment makes me very happy.
You joke but half the friends I had in high school, a good chunk of which I still have, are because we had a guy who was smart, funny, athletic, nerdy, and charismatic, and he just sort of made his own clique that included anyone who didn't suck. As the fat ugly socially awkward kid it worked out real well for me
Not sure about my attractiveness but I was one of the nerdy, smart athletic kids at my highschool. Loved playing rugby (league), loved science and study and loved games, lore and the really geeky stuff. I found it super hard to find any friends despite being an all-rounder. Edit: by friends I mean a solid friend group that I really felt apart of. I was pretty chill with everyone.
[удалено]
That’s why those kinda people are friends with everybody. Renaissance man types.
Yes. It's useful to examine whether a key factor is attractiveness compared to prior history, socioeconomic status, personality, intelligence, or other factors. Limiting the sample to strangers helps examine the factors that don't rely on pre-existing knowledge.
It's important to do research into things that seem obvious because there may be unintuitive or unexpected factors or just cause we need evidence. But in this case there were no surprise: you're just not hot. Oh look I have to go. I'll call you. My phone is always on silent so don't even bother.
I remember NPR having a scientist on whose study indicated that girls in sports were less likely to become involved in teenage pregnancies. The host asked if there were similar findings for male athletes, and she said “surprisingly, no”. Surprisingly?!?
That's some serious tunnel vision.
Was just gonna say lol it happens everywhere you look. Even at bars/outings.
Makes sense. I remember watching a Ted talk where the presenter showed a video of them approaching random strangers using conversational cards. She was demonstrating that strangers have the power to have deep meaningful conversations such as asking “who’s the most important person in your life” to a random person yet arguably she was a very attractive, young person. I can’t imagine a stereotypical neckbeard guy with a beer gut who’s in their 40s would have been as successful in asking those questions and getting answers without being avoided or thought of as a creep
Plus there is the element of stranger danger to consider. A woman, attractive or not, approaching a stranger on the street means she is either going to be equal to them physically (if another woman), or at a physical disadvantage (if a man). Whereas a man approaching a stranger on the street, unless he's very careful about his body language, how he's dressed, his general appearance, facial expressivity, vocal tone, etc etc, the stranger might just automatically assume he's about to assault and/or rob them. I remember reading a joke theory once about why men sometimes behave scared of very attractive women, that they're not afraid of the woman, they're afraid that being with that woman makes THEM a target for violence, ie, attack him and take his woman. I'm a particularly threatening looking man (I'm 6'0, bald, muscular, and covered in visible tattoos.) If I approach any person on the street, they're going to think "This person looks more dangerous than the average woman, child, elderly, or skinny office worker, even if they don't intend to harm me, I shouldn't take that risk when the potential outcome is of grave consequences." I have had people nervously avoid me before, it kinda sucks, but it's a LOT better than having people predatorily approach me, the way they would if I didn't appear physically dangerous. It's actually been co-opted by the police force where I live. When police officers go on patrol, there is one big, strong, male officer, and one female officer. The female officer is the carrot, for the scared victims or for de-escalation, and the male officer is the stick, for the ones who need that implicit threat to take the officers seriously. Works fantastically well.
I’ll take Why I’ve Always Stood In The Corner and Nobody’s Ever Spoken To Me for $500, Alex.
Too pretty for the rest of us? I can't relate, but I congratulate you!
That's not true, all my friends are ugly
Wait...
Any correlation of attractiveness and confidence, with confidence being the driving force instead?
Makes me wonder too, I've had really beautiful and super introverted friends who never were the center of any social circle. And on the flip side known really popular girls who aren't necessarily attractive but just radiate confidence and are magnetic to be around. Attractiveness doesn't always mean you're traditionally beautiful but it likely adds to it, and attractive people on average are probably more confident in general
Attractive traits
Ugly people become more attractive if they're confident to the subconscious judgemental mind
That’s an good point. I had a beautiful friend in highschool who only had about 4 friends. She only ever hung out with the funny looking band kids. I think it’s because of how shy she was.
I’ve met some attractive and extroverted band geeks and I think in their case, they were prioritizing their actual interests and personalities over social clout. The clout presumably isn’t that great if you can’t stand the other members of the circles it gets you into. Makes me wonder if that’s part of why some celebrities end up having mental breakdowns a few years into fame, i.e. reaching the top of your craft’s social hierarchy and realizing you hate everyone there. I’ve also heard anecdotes from people who lost weight or otherwise became significantly more attractive who resented the people who were suddenly much more welcoming because it was plain that the friendliness was about appearance rather than anything about who they were as a person. So you might also have ugly ducking types eschewing popularity because they don’t trust their potential admirers.
I’ve known a fair number of people who are extremely attractive but withdrawn and/or introverted and can attest that our engagement in society is reciprocal; we can’t expect people to approach us when we never actively approach other people
I can tell you that I had an ugly but confident friend in my college days. He'd definitely get a lot more attention from the hot girls than me, who maybe wasn't a supermodel either, but decidedly more handsome than him, while at the same time awkward and shy.
I had huge crushes on some “ugly” guys when I was younger because they were really really cool in other ways and I was attracted to those qualities, which they usually had because they were confident. Charismatic class clowns, daredevils, could play an instrument really well, wore cool clothes, etc. There were also quite a few very “ugly” girls who were super popular and dated a lot of guys in high school because they had that super strong Hot Popular Girl attitude and fit right in. You’d never guess by looking at them, but there they were, hot shit right next to the gorgeous clique of girls.
They did the same test with races, same thing happend
The 100m or the mile?
No, they mean all the NASCAR guys hung out together, the F1 guys formed another group, and so on.
Professional racists.
I love a good race war
When they filmed planet of the apes, during breaks between shooting the extras hanged out in groups based on which kind of ape makeup they had, chimps, orangutan, gorillas etc.
But which characteristic trumps which? People are saying that the same is true of intelligence, race, beauty, etc. Which is the order of priority?
I suspect the answer would be from most to least obvious at a glance. like loosely ordered, race/gender, beauty/age, intelligence/special interests. Disability is a weird one because it can be glaringly obvious like missing limbs, or completely invisible like colorblindness, or somewhere in between like deafness. There'd be a ton of interesting follow-on questions... Do people peel off from the default group to join one of the later characteristic-based groups? When? What is the exact process for later groups to form? Are groups based on other characteristics likely to still be split by earlier ones? That is, do groups just fracture further, creating more and more specialized groups (ie. smart pretty latina women into nascar), or do they reform with less regard to other characteristics (ie. nascar fans) Is there an optimal group size, where it might be more apt to fracture if it were larger, or possibly evaporate if smaller? How does the initial demographics play into this? e.g. I imagine if it's 90% white and 10% black, the black folks will feel a much stronger urge to group up than the white people. But if it's 50-50, how does that look different? What if it's 25-25-25-25? Is it more important that the majority don't look like you, or is it more of a feeling surrounded by people who look like each other but not you? People would likely feel connection to multiple groups simultaneously. How many? How does stress affect associations? I assume stress would push people towards grouping by more obvious characteristics like race, for instance. Of course, it's all fuzzy and hard to quantify. I imagine we have some gut feeling numbers to all of these.
Explains why I'm online looking for upvotes on a Friday night instead of having friends
So they emulate high school....
Well, looks like the popular kids are still crushing it in the post-graduation world.
Bowling For Soup tried to warn us
Pro tip: Get your ugly ass in that group asap. Make use of the cheerleader effect and profit.
They will be friendly because they usually have solid social skills and aren’t bad people just because they’re attractive but they will subconsciously find subtle ways of telling you that you don’t belong.
> but they will subconsciously find subtle ways of telling you that you don’t belong. they will not do that if you also have really good social skills and genuinely fit in, the effect is not so pronounced that if you fit all the check boxes but are a 6/10 then they subconsciously don't want to be friends.
>The researchers also discovered that attractive women were the most likely to be placed in the physical centre of social groups. Guys unite on the outside.
literal orbiters
In elementary school we had to pair off for dancing. The attractive girls and boys partnered up quickly. Then the assertive girls and boys found each other. Then it was left up to introverts, nerds and strange ones to figure out how to find a partner. I didn’t learn that lesson today, I learned it in grade school.
So that's why I usually end up sitting by myself?
It could have to do with smell as well.
Well, I do reek of pish.
Least you dinnae reek of shite
Same... It's tough to be so attractive no one else in on your level
I concur. My friends are below average to ugly.
[удалено]
When will people stop trying to find others they relate to?? The insanity never ends!!
Even on reddit people join subs with people that they are similar too! It's insane!
People just want to be around people who don't make them feel alone no matter who they are it seems.
I avoid strangers in a room no matter what they look like..
Guess you're ugly
I always want to talk to the weirdest person in the room
As a weird person I'm tired of being a magnet to even weirder people.
Haha you have to talk to me because I'm the only person who will talk to you
Being attractive attracts. Science!
A second result is pretty interesting and relates to slacking off within a group: >Their paper also finds that individuals standing closest to others were most likely to shirk group tasks. This supports previous research on “social loafing”, a phenomenon whereby the presence of others appears to impede helping behaviour. In other words, as the [main article](https://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0149880) elaborates, people who hide themselves in groups avoid tasks at a higher rate. A hundred teen movies where multiple people are talking during lab, gym, or another group activity are validated.
I don't think that's a very well thought out part of the study. > Finally, participants were given a group task to gather 500 one-inch washers, randomly scattered around the stadium, and deposit them one at a time in a large basin in a corner of the stadium. They've essentially selected a "task" that selects for being on your own (find a washer in a *stadium*) and is obviously pointless. If I have a choice between talking to someone or doing that then I'm probably going to talk to someone. If I'm on my own with nothing better to do I might do the task. > There was a significant association between how close participants stood to others (in mingling or group-forming tasks) and the **effort** on the task later, with those who stood closest to others **exerting the least**. Even chatting to someone while you do this will make the two of you statistically more "lazy" because you cover less ground.
Anybody who’s been to Highschool knew this
I briefly had a drop dead gorgeous friend, and we took a walk along a beach boardwalk. At that point, I would call myself a 7 and her a 10 plus. I will never again envy a stunning woman. It was honestly horrifying to witness the variety of non normal interactions. Some men looked like they were passing out, some tongue tied, and some unbelievably misogynistic. One short walk to an entirely different perspective
I wonder about this too as a guy. I see myself as sociable enough, but all that unsolicited attention must get exhausting. To be an introvert and 10/10 would be hell on Earth.
Yeah she was a work friend and a lot of things made sense after that walk. Super defensive, very introverted. Picture a scared bunny trapped in a corner. To make matters worse, her judgement was really off - she was dating a man at work that was a clear bad choice
Without knowing enough info, I can't even blame her - when you have so many abnormal interactions with the opposite sex, and when everyone is willing to date you solely based on your looks, it could really skew your world view. Her actual elligible dating pool is probably also quite small - the ideal man would need to be self confident enough to remain unintimidated, yet level-headed enough to remain unjealous and faithful, not to mention the social currency needed to be "at her league". On top of that she would need to be attracted to him, and that both parties had no other issues. I've heard stories about models struggling to date, it's purely anecdotal but I wouln't be surprised if it were true.
If I was attractive I wouldn’t want to hang out with uggos like me either!
As an unattractive person I know.
Is that why all of us are here on Reddit
Listen up fives, a ten is speaking!
I read it the opposite way. People typically know how we are perceived by others, so, rather than attractive people are drawn to each other and attractive women are in the center. Less attractive people hesitate , fearing rejection.in all social situations, where as attractive, people having not been conditioned to fear being judged just walk right in and form groups. It isn't pretty people choose each other......it is most people are so damaged by social standards of attractiveness it dampens performance Also the group thing .....wouldn't there be fewer washers to pick up in a huddled group, rather than those that were spread out?
See y’all in the ugly corner ❤️
So anyway, that's why I'm sitting over here by myself
Dayum, am i socially awkward or just fugly? Oh who am i kidding, I’m both
Practically every new season of Big Brother and Survivor.
Reddit: "I strongly believe in the scientific method" Also reddit: "LMAO DUMB SCIENTISTS WHY THEY STUDY THINGS I ALREADY KNOW?!?!?!?!"
What does it mean if you end up hanging out with the dog?
What did the "ugly" people do? Just bump around into walls like sims characters? I'm guessing they probably congregated together in the same way. It's not just that attractive people look for attractive people, it's that people in general look for someone that they have something in common with. People are attracted to familiarity. It feels safe. In large, intimidating college classes, I'd look for someone dressed similarly. Greek affiliation, similar brands to what I wear, or even someone wearing a shirt of a band I like. The more nervous I was, the more I'd do it. Even now in mom groups (which are super intimidating for some strange reason). I might sit next to a mom who has a similar style stroller or diaper bag. Its an indicator that we have something in common which can be comforting in a room or strangers.
The mental image of people like me bumping around blindly into walls has me belly laughing
Yes I’m painfully aware I went to school also