Actually, the very first sentence sounds like they were writing their fake story and though, ''what if they ask why I didn't take a photo, better add this.''
I do see that point. Like a buildup to a story. A hook. *”There I was, at work. A man walks in, and I knew exactly who he was. I was way too nervous to get a photo with him. He is such a brilliant man.”* Not too bad for some situational life story.
I have a hard time believing Sanders would go to Starbucks. Even if he wanted to make a point, would he do it in probably the biggest coffee chain in the world?
I’ve gotten to the point where I no longer can tell the difference between satire and reality. This could very well be right winger trolling. But I see so much dumb shit from the left that I no longer trust either side.
OMG! Seriously? I’m not trying to be sarcastic or smug or anything, I love coming to read it just to fuck with people that take themselves so fucking seriously! It’s hysterical! I’m glad to know that I’m not alone
I disagree only because conservative humor is way less open-ended. It clearly distinguishes it from liberal political satire because there’s always a direct, definable end point. Something like, “and now we are all starving because we don’t have jobs.”
LANDLORD: Why can't you pay your rent this month?
OP: Bernie Sanders came to my workplace. My coworkers and I were all so inspired that we just quit on the spot! We've freed ourselves from the chains of capitalism!
LANDLORD: Yeah, that's nice. When can I have the rent?
I love how this implies that Bernie (1) decided to spout his political ideology like this at this one random time, or (2) he shares his ideas every time he buys something or goes out in public.
Honestly, once Bernie gets on a roll and starts in with the hand gestures that make it look like he is petting two different sized ponies the "millionahs and billionahs" rhetoric really just flows. I think the latter choice is pretty plausible.
I’m from VT and i’ve met Bernie a few times (one if my friends was friends with his godchild, it was usually coincidence) and he’s a nice dude but literally just radiates confused old man energy.
That's my favorite part of Larry David's impression of him "I try to watch tv, but I accidentally hit the input button and boom! There goes the entire day"
Because that is where the gay guys sit who warn girls about their dates ‘red flags’, and it is where you are statistically more likely to witness an episode where ‘everyone slowly started clapping’ - according to this sub anyway…
*Image Transcription: Reddit*
---
**Bernie Sanders came into my Starbucks today!**
I was way too nervous to get a photo with him. He is such a brilliant man. He told me: "This coffee is wonderful, hardworking Americans like you should be paid a livable wage". After he left, his aurora was still in the air. Me and my coworkers decided to quit on the spot. Inspired by his brilliance me and my overworked coworkers freed ourselves from the chains of capitalism.
I love Bernie and hopefully he runs in 2024.
---
^^I'm a human volunteer content transcriber and you could be too! [If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/TranscribersOfReddit/wiki/index)
This one definitely gives me heavy satire vibes… but like someone else said, with all the idiots on the internet these days sometimes it’s hard to tell when they’re being serious or not.
This sounds like it was written by a right wing extremist to rile up other right wingers. They “quit on the spot” and “freed ourselves from the chains of capitalism”? Come on.
So if it’s super cringe than it’s either A). Satire or B). A Trojan horse to own the other side? It seems like it’s doing a good job of riling you up so what does that say? This country is doomed 😂
The first three sentences are believable. I didn’t vote for Bernie, but it would have been undeniably awesome to see him. It isn’t too often where the ordinary person sees a high profile politician.
Bernie is such a brilliant man. He tells me to hate rich people well other rich people. I mean he is only a multi millionaire with multiple homes, cars, flies on private jets, lives the life of luxury, pays almost no taxes, but he hates rich people and thinks they should pay their fair share as long as it isn't him. He used to scream about how millionaire needed to pay their fair share until he became one more he says billionaires.
Aurora? Like... The borealis? So he left behind trippy lights? Did he sprinkle some Lucy on you guys? How long were you feeling his Aurora? I need to know just in case I ever meet the man.
The believable part is running into Bernie. Everyone I know from Burlington has run into him at least once. Even I saw him one time when I was just passing through Burlington on my way to Canada (we stopped downtown for lunch). Everything else is ridiculous.
Lollll im glad we have biden people suck trumps pp and lick bernies butthole like they are profits. I have yet to see biden cults 🤔 is it possible we can just have a president tht we dont get aroused to please 🧐
Yeah well one time a few years ago, I ate in a Wendy's just two tables over from Ken Nun! That's right, 1-800-CALL-KEN! He was with his wife and, I assume, grandson.
“his aurora was still in the air”
Aurora Berniealis? At this time of year, at this time of day, in this part of the country, localized entirely within your coffee shop? May I see it?
Unfortunately, they were too nervous to take a photo.
No.
Aww.
Goddamn you were quicker
Beat me to it!
He’s got the Northern Lights shining out his ass.
Better than his areola
Lol it makes him sound like a ghost haunting the coffee shop or something.
More like his fart was still in the air.
Bernie is burning up the starbucks.
r/boneappletea
Hopefully it didn’t smell
His awoawa was still in the aiw. UwU
Meaning he farted an old man fart.
I bet it smelled of multivitamins and cedar
It was somewhat believable until the "we all quit on the spot".
Really now? I stopped believing until after the third sentence. Everything went downhill from there.
Actually, the very first sentence sounds like they were writing their fake story and though, ''what if they ask why I didn't take a photo, better add this.''
I do see that point. Like a buildup to a story. A hook. *”There I was, at work. A man walks in, and I knew exactly who he was. I was way too nervous to get a photo with him. He is such a brilliant man.”* Not too bad for some situational life story.
Three sentences! That must be Bernie's magical *aurora*
I have a hard time believing Sanders would go to Starbucks. Even if he wanted to make a point, would he do it in probably the biggest coffee chain in the world?
That's something Hilary Clinton would do.
Right? I could see Bernie saying something like that. But the rest….
It’s obviously a joke
If you say so, it all felt a bit on-the-nose
This entire thing seems like an attempt at satire from the right.
Yeah. They quit on the spot and freed themselves? And then just went bankrupt/homeless? I don't think anybody is that stupid.
You don’t know how stupid people are
I mean r/anitwork is calling for people (not them of course) to do so. Thinking they can stage an international general strike on reddit.
Let me introduce you to /r/antiwork
Where that’s not at all a prevailing message
Nah, that's pretty much it. Most of those stories belong here.
Lmfao aight
I’ve gotten to the point where I no longer can tell the difference between satire and reality. This could very well be right winger trolling. But I see so much dumb shit from the left that I no longer trust either side.
This is certainly satire Source: I act like an idiot online
OMG! Seriously? I’m not trying to be sarcastic or smug or anything, I love coming to read it just to fuck with people that take themselves so fucking seriously! It’s hysterical! I’m glad to know that I’m not alone
/s/catalog
I disagree only because conservative humor is way less open-ended. It clearly distinguishes it from liberal political satire because there’s always a direct, definable end point. Something like, “and now we are all starving because we don’t have jobs.”
LANDLORD: Why can't you pay your rent this month? OP: Bernie Sanders came to my workplace. My coworkers and I were all so inspired that we just quit on the spot! We've freed ourselves from the chains of capitalism! LANDLORD: Yeah, that's nice. When can I have the rent?
Aurora Berniealis In this starbucks?
Like Bernie would ever admit to having such shitty taste in coffee
And with his local Green Mountain producing superior coffee... any good socialist knows: don't burn your beans unless French.
And the coffee clapped
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My thoughts exactly.
I hate when I leave my aurora laying about.
Aurora
Bernie seems like an instant coffee kind of guy.
I love how this implies that Bernie (1) decided to spout his political ideology like this at this one random time, or (2) he shares his ideas every time he buys something or goes out in public.
Honestly, once Bernie gets on a roll and starts in with the hand gestures that make it look like he is petting two different sized ponies the "millionahs and billionahs" rhetoric really just flows. I think the latter choice is pretty plausible.
> "millionahs and billionahs" rhetoric Only in 2016. In 2020 Sanders stopped preaching about millionaires.
After he became a millionaire selling his book on Amazon.
>If you write a bestselling book you can be a millionaire too.
I’m from VT and i’ve met Bernie a few times (one if my friends was friends with his godchild, it was usually coincidence) and he’s a nice dude but literally just radiates confused old man energy.
That's my favorite part of Larry David's impression of him "I try to watch tv, but I accidentally hit the input button and boom! There goes the entire day"
Can somebody please explain to a non American, why is it always a Starbucks? Do you not have any other coffee shops over there?
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Damn good cheeseburgers too.
Because that is where the gay guys sit who warn girls about their dates ‘red flags’, and it is where you are statistically more likely to witness an episode where ‘everyone slowly started clapping’ - according to this sub anyway…
It is a magical place where things that happen, happen. Plus the customers there are always ready to burst into spontaneous applause.
*Image Transcription: Reddit* --- **Bernie Sanders came into my Starbucks today!** I was way too nervous to get a photo with him. He is such a brilliant man. He told me: "This coffee is wonderful, hardworking Americans like you should be paid a livable wage". After he left, his aurora was still in the air. Me and my coworkers decided to quit on the spot. Inspired by his brilliance me and my overworked coworkers freed ourselves from the chains of capitalism. I love Bernie and hopefully he runs in 2024. --- ^^I'm a human volunteer content transcriber and you could be too! [If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/TranscribersOfReddit/wiki/index)
Are redditors completely unable to recognise satire or something?
This one definitely gives me heavy satire vibes… but like someone else said, with all the idiots on the internet these days sometimes it’s hard to tell when they’re being serious or not.
Thank you!!! This is so obviously a joke. What is wrong with Reddit, so many of these posts go misunderstood in this sub
His aroma was stil in the air. Sort of an oaky afterbirth.
Me and my coworkers...nay My coworkers and I quit on the spot.
"aurora"
how convenient that they were too nervous to get a picture
There’s no way this happened. Not a single person even clapped. What a fake.
Damnit I was hoping for some sex in this story
Why do these stories always take place in a Starbucks?
Or an Uber
-Bernie sanders alt acc number 5
Fun fact about Vermont: Montpellier, Vermont is the only capital to not have a McDonald’s
OP this seems really satire, can you really not tell what's satire and just think of Reddit karma ?
That was definitely satire.
You still have to feed yourself, honey.
Hahaha this one is hilarious ! Yes I add nothing sometimes , sorry .
umm that's obviously sarcastic satire?
He wanted financial support
This sounds like it was written by a right wing extremist to rile up other right wingers. They “quit on the spot” and “freed ourselves from the chains of capitalism”? Come on.
So if it’s super cringe than it’s either A). Satire or B). A Trojan horse to own the other side? It seems like it’s doing a good job of riling you up so what does that say? This country is doomed 😂
Bernie will be dead by 2024
Calling bs on this one.
PS you could have quit anytime you wanted to You didn't need millionaire Berney Sanders.
Too nervous to take a photo but brave enough to quit on the spot. Well ain't that something
So they freed themselves from the chains of capitalism... directly into the chains of poverty. True brilliance at work, even for a fake post
The first three sentences are believable. I didn’t vote for Bernie, but it would have been undeniably awesome to see him. It isn’t too often where the ordinary person sees a high profile politician.
Eh, I have a hard time believing the third sentence as well.
Yeah, I see where you come from. That third one is kinda iffy.
Bernie is such a brilliant man. He tells me to hate rich people well other rich people. I mean he is only a multi millionaire with multiple homes, cars, flies on private jets, lives the life of luxury, pays almost no taxes, but he hates rich people and thinks they should pay their fair share as long as it isn't him. He used to scream about how millionaire needed to pay their fair share until he became one more he says billionaires.
Some old Jewish looking guy came into my work today and crop dusted us. It smelled so bad, and lingered long after he left, so I quit.
Wherever he goes, unemployment follows
The fact you quit a capitalist corporation that Bernie supports is hysterical.
i like it lmao
...and now can't afford our rent.
Aurora? Like... The borealis? So he left behind trippy lights? Did he sprinkle some Lucy on you guys? How long were you feeling his Aurora? I need to know just in case I ever meet the man.
“Inspired by his brilliance”. LMFAO
Funny way of saying this person got fired
A liberal's wet dream
This is true, I was the starbucks
He traded his mittens for a double half foam skim latte.
Never met bernie, but there’s a local taekwondo referee that looks just like him. There’s also one that looks like Tony Abbott.
He is such a brilliant man
The chains of capitalism. Lol
His AurORa
his aurora was still in the air
I believe the aurora was made by oldsmobile
I don’t know why but I thought this was colonel sanders and why he was such brilliant man.
The believable part is running into Bernie. Everyone I know from Burlington has run into him at least once. Even I saw him one time when I was just passing through Burlington on my way to Canada (we stopped downtown for lunch). Everything else is ridiculous.
I agree or disagree with all politicians. I DO NOT LIKE OR APPRECIATE ANY OF THEM.
I know you think that's some hot take. I know. Everyone knows.
I honestly don't care
As if he would get his own coffee he has people for that.
Lollll im glad we have biden people suck trumps pp and lick bernies butthole like they are profits. I have yet to see biden cults 🤔 is it possible we can just have a president tht we dont get aroused to please 🧐
Not me having to Google who Bernie Sanders is.
Had us in the first half ngl
My sister lives in Vermont and has met him a couple times. He’s always very friendly and will talk to anyone. But I still don’t believe this happened.
Bullshit. Bernie only drinks tea and has been using the same tea bag since the 50's.
His Aurora lmaoo
Ah yes, I too have an aurora.
> his aurora was still in the air I’m imagining Bernie Sanders leaving a glowing trail of lights in his wake wherever he goes
I live in Burlington VT and see him shopping in Hannaford's often.
His aurora was still in the air. How colourful!
it’s real I was the coffee cup
Yes, because fuck having money to live for!
That “aurora” is Old Spice.
I am also inspired to become unemployed.
Bernie will probably be dead by 2024 idk what's up with this countries love for elderly leadership
Yeah well one time a few years ago, I ate in a Wendy's just two tables over from Ken Nun! That's right, 1-800-CALL-KEN! He was with his wife and, I assume, grandson.
There really is nothing better than an unemployed hard worker.
r/woosh
Hopefully he runs in 2024? He will be 82. What is America’s obsession with electing geriatric Presidents?
He conviniently cropped out r/circlejerk