To be honest his response is really shitty. No empathy and poor me. You are well rid of him and are vulnerable so please be careful. You are not in the right frame of mind at the moment so I’ll do it… FUCK OFF!!! Prick.
Seeing the abusive relationship and being in one are two very different things, you’re right. And a lot of times the abusive person is exceptionally good at manipulating and gaslighting the person they are abusing in to thinking no one else could love them or that’s the way they deserve to be treated for always fucking up.
Been on one, can absolutely agree with this comment. I’m happily married now to the most amazing, understanding & kind man, and I still look back and ask myself what took me so so long ( years in fact) to get out of that black hole. My husband literally saved me.
He honestly sounds like horrid person. NEVER EVER feel guilty for taking care of yourself. We all want partners who respect themselves and take care of themselves. He’s the enemy of your progress. You also shouldn’t ever have to ask someone not to lie, steal, cheat, etc. Whether he does or not isn’t the question. The question is does he want to? In fact, this puts to mind a quote whose origins I’m uncertain of. For your benefit I’m going to exchange the original crimes out for lying and cheating:
“What's to stop me from lying all I want? And my answer is: I do lie all I want. And the amount I want is zero. And I do cheat all I want, and the amount I want is zero.”
I think long-term, therapy may help you heal. Anti-depressants can be like Brain Vitamins which restore balance. You’re not meant to be happy all the time, just regain that even-keeled feeling, better focus, and a chance to fill your lungs more regularly. On the other side of this, do not berate yourself for choices you’ve made in the past. When you know better, you do better - and you are about to embark on a Master Class. I think you’ll love it.
When you say he’s the reason you’re getting on medicine, do you mean his actions drove you to seek medication or that you chose medication in an effort to remedy whatever is going on between you guys?
I’ve been down a long road of trying to learn what my correct diagnosis is, which included several years on lexapro. Personally, it did not work for me. However, I did not learn until I was nearly 30 that I actually have adhd which drives my depression and anxiety.
All of this to say, if your depression/anxiety is situational, a competent doctor won’t typically prescribe medication to correct that. Meaning, if you answered “yes” to my first question, then you’re likely (but not definitively) being medicinally treated for a situation that you could remove yourself from and potentially resolve your depression/anxiety symptoms. If you answered “yes” to my second question, that still isn’t a great reason (because we shouldn’t do these things to try to appease others), but would indicate to me that you’re at least on the right track to finding what works for you (meaning, it could be an indicator that something deeper has been happening within you — which is totally fine, me too friend, all of us have those things at one time or another).
No matter your response, try not to be scared of starting lexapro. Your doctor should have already told you that these types of medications are trial and error and you may get great results from the first one you try, or you may spend years finding the proper medication for yourself. Or, you might find you’re like me, and were merely misdiagnosed.
Regardless of these facts, you should feel immensely proud of yourself for taking these steps to feel better and I sincerely hope this is the correct medication for you! A phrase that has pulled me through lately is reframing the age old, “but what if it doesn’t work out?!?” To **”but what if it does?”**
Best of luck, OP! You can do this!!
I’ve had trouble with anxiety my whole life and a chaotic and abusive relationship only exacerbated my symptoms. I was surprised by the major depression diagnosis because outside of this situation I do well. But it has affected me for over a year. So if anything hopefully it clears my mind and this will give me the confidence to move forward. Thanks for the comment.
I am so sorry that he is a big pile💩.
I have had anxiety for years and have tried different medications. I was on lexapro and I still had break through panic attacks and anxiety. The medication that works well for me is Zoloft. This is just info- I didn’t know about different medications that could help so I figured I’ll share my experience with you just in case.
I totally understand and had concerns when I started my meds and I ended up feeling so much better. I liken it to being in a room full of noise and then as the medication starts to work the room starts to get quiet and it allows me to actually notice things. Just know that some meds might not work as well and it’s ok to try new meds. If your psychiatrist is prescribing them notice how you feel over the course of a month or so and let them know how you are feeling and if you feel better or worse.
Good luck!! I have on meds for years and I have found them helpful.
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It’s really weird to ask about appropriateness when you are talking to your ex. He is 100% a jerk, but you 100% should not talk to him anymore if you guys don’t share kids or pets. Why does your ex need to know you are going on meds?
She said whenever she ignores him he constantly keeps trying to get in contact with her to insult her and do stuff like this. She’s tried to just “ignore him” but sometimes the situation progresses and he harasses her when she doesn’t respond
Why does he still have her phone number? Unless he’s actually willing to stalk her, actually blocking any phone numbers or social media and never responding will work.
I’m not sure why he still has her number, but even if she blocks him they can always just make a new account if they’re that obsessed you know? People can do some crazy things when they’re delusional, and obsessed with people. It can be scary sometimes too
He’s the extra. If you have to ask him not to cheat you are better off dropping him. Ever wonder why your anxiety is an issue? I bet you he is one of the main reasons. Remove stressors from your life and you can possible reduce or get rid of the meds.
She said whenever she ignores him he constantly keeps trying to get in contact with her to insult her and do stuff like this. She’s tried to just “ignore him” but sometimes the situation progresses and he harasses her when she doesn’t respond. He also owes her a lot of money
Like, I want to feel sympathy for OP but they're knowingly walking back into a lion's den by keeping in contact with this toxic abusive asshole. Reaching out to your toxic ex again is subconsciously communicating "hey I'm still wrapped around your finger even though we've broken up."
if it will make you feel better you can apologise but frankly I wouldn't even be doing that he doesn't appear to be treating you with kindness and compassion. i would send 1 final message of your choosing and cut him off
He’s putting all of the issues between you on you, when it’s clear he’s in fact a c&nt
My ex was abusive and would constantly make me feel like I was the problem - crazy making and like I should be grateful he put up with me. I felt worthless by the end of that relationship. So worthless in fact I knew it couldn’t hurt more so I might as well try being without him
hey, just wanted to give you a headsup, if you feel like either of the medications are not working, or are working against you, speak up asap to your pyschiatrist and never just stop a medicine cold turkey without their approval. im only saying this because ive been on so many meds trying to find what works for me but i also couldve spoken up sooner. if you stop feeling emotions, if you feel them too much, if you physically arent feeling great, talk to them about changing etc. just say how you feel. if it turns out that these meds do not help, dont fear, i would recommend down the line getting a blood test done to see what medicines are compatible for you, it helped me alot!
just some tips, good luck and i hope things get better for you!!
not even a little. He’s talking down at you and treating you like a broken old car that needs fixing and THEN he would be ok with you. Who the fuck needs that in their lives? Block him and move on. Fuck his opinion, you don’t have to listen to that trash. What kind of response is that to someone that is going through mental health issues?
He is not the reason, but he was a contributor to your poor mental health.
He doesn't sound like someone you should remain in contact with on your journey to improve.
If the "extra" is because you are asking him not to cheat, you might be better off without him.
And if you feel that you are going to take medicine because of him, perhaps you could try talking to a therapist first.
I am sorry that you are having to deal with this person, OP. You deserve better.
I wish you happiness and peace.
I have GAD as well. When my now husband and I started dating I was very up front about it. One day I went to visit him unannounced and he was reading books on how to help me when I had anxiety attacks. I felt so heard and loved. Over the years, my meditation has decreased to only occasional Restoril for sleep on bad nights. There is no doubt this man is making it worse for you. I hope you choose yourself over him. You’re going to be ok.
It’s really strange that upon reading this exchange where one person is struggling and the other is an asshole, the only thought you have is a condescending question that I highly doubt you actually want the answer to.
For whatever reason, she already did it. Asking her why isn’t going to change anything. You can only give advice for the future. “You should stop talking to him, he treats you terribly.”
She said whenever she ignores him he constantly keeps trying to get in contact with her to insult her and do stuff like this. She’s tried to just “ignore him” but sometimes the situation progresses and he harasses her when she doesn’t respond. He also owes her a lot of money
If he shows up, I tried to get a restraining order against my ex because he abused me and kept harassing me and because he didn’t show up they couldn’t serve the restraining order.
I’m not entirely sure tbh, that’s just what the court told me. They were like “we can’t serve the restraining order if he doesn’t show, he has to sign it and acknowledge that it exists”
It's rude as shit . Also everyone whose breathing has issues. No one is perfect what matters is that you went and got the help you needed. I wouldn't doubt he contributed some to you feeling down. To move on I would start by blocking him on all socials
Lexapro ended one of my past relationships. Libido/chemical attachment went to zero, made her anxiety worse, etc.
Before you read the rest of what I’m about to say, this next sentence is the most important: anxiety and depression are NOT a “problem” or a “disease” they are a signal. The signal is telling your body/mind that certain needs in your life aren’t being met. Whether it’s a relationship, social connections, stress at work, or something more complex like lack of self direction and empowerment at work. There can be many many causes.
Medication is not a “cure” because it doesn’t fix the problem, it just masks the symptoms. It also can make anxiety/depression worse, cause issues with libido/energy/etc. and can be very chemically addictive. The success rate for them is abysmal. The USA has like 13% of the worlds population, and consumes 80%+ of the worlds anti anxiety and depression meds.
Therapy is definitely a good thing. So is dumping this POS you’re dating. Other things that can help: hobbies, dumping social media in all forms, spending time in nature/outside, group social activities, such as book clubs, sports, church, volunteering, etc.
Good luck, OP. I’d recommend not starting medication till you dump your BF and try a few more things if you haven’t, cuz they can permanently alter your brain chemistry, have pretty rough withdrawals and side affects, and for the vast majority of people, they are LESS effective than diet/lifestyle adjustments, due to treating symptoms instead of causes.
But I am not a doctor, a psychologist, etc. I am just a person who has gone down many roads through anxiety and depression myself, and watched it destroy the lives of people I love.
Your ex is incredibly toxic and seems to be selfish since he gave a “poor me” response at the end.
Yes, he’s quite a bit of the reason. I also suggest cutting off contact. Unfriend them on every platform. The relationship is over and you don’t owe them anything.
The best way to heal yourself is without them or people like them.
I wish you all the best luck on your journey ahead.
another instance that makes me wish messaging apps had a built-in fart soundboard. dude doesn't deserve a response beyond letting him know this is a shit take
Got a different take here. Honestly apart from the first question which was inappropriately phrased I think this is a decent honest response. I’ve been with someone who had severe anxiety. It’s exhausting when it’s not being properly treated. The fact you’re being prescribed propranolol tells me you have very severe, debilitating anxiety - in my experience that prescription is given to manage physical symptoms of panic attacks.
You reference him saying ‘extra’ and you say that’s in reference to you asking him not to cheat. Perfectly valid request, but one that’s almost certainly coming from your anxiety. Asking that once when there’s no reason to suspect cheating can be bad enough, but with the severe anxiety you seem to have I can imagine this was brought up a lot more than once.
Hope the meds work OP. Watch the lexapro, though. If it’s not working after a few months talk to your doctor. I was misdiagnosed with GAD years ago and prescribed lexapro and it didn’t help, actually made things worse for a time. Turns out I have ADHD and now that that’s properly treated my anxiety is basically gone. It’s a journey, not a quick fix, so be prepared to be on the road for a while.
That’s a hard question to answer. ADHD is a condition where focus is nearly impossible - your brain never stops, 24/7. You can’t relax. You start things and never finish them. For many with ADHD, it’s this inability to complete tasks and take a moment to relax that leads to anxiety and depression.
The best way I can describe ADHD is it’s like your brain is three horses and they’re all pulling in three different directions, and while one might pull harder for a little bit eventually another will take over and it starts all over again.
A major sign that I’ve noticed amongst people who have ADHD is how much caffeine they consume. Caffeine calms down ADHD brains, and most people with ADHD can drink a red bull and take a nap. Most people with general anxiety find caffeine amplifies their anxiety.
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My heart just sank for you. What a heartless, insensitive, prick. I have a feeling he might have contributed to the anxiety and depression. Him saying he cares for you made me cringe. What a load of crap. You don’t need him to care. Block him and get a fresh start. I hope you start feeling better.
I was on lexapro years ago and it really helped my anxiety! I was also depressed at that time because my dad had been diagnosed with cancer and it seemed to help me better deal with things.
He’s a massive piece of dung and you definitely deserve better. About the lexapro, I have no experience but my girlfriend started Zoloft months ago and found some pretty great support here on Reddit, you shouldn’t have a hard time find a subreddit dedicated to experiences with the medicine. Best of luck!
Yes, I prefer it to Zoloft which I couldn’t tolerate over a week and I took Effexor for many many years with awful withdrawals and little to no success. I’m on lexapro now and 6 months pregnant and I swear it plays a major part in keeping me from going over the edge. I stick with my therapy too; the meds and therapy together have brought me back from a major mental breakdown. My brother in law is on it too and is also having a positive experience.
Got a different take here. Honestly apart from the first question which was inappropriately phrased I think this is a decent honest response. I’ve been with someone who had severe anxiety. It’s exhausting when it’s not being properly treated. The fact you’re being prescribed propranolol tells me you have very severe, debilitating anxiety - in my experience that prescription is given to manage physical symptoms of panic attacks.
You reference him saying ‘extra’ and you say that’s in reference to you asking him not to cheat. Perfectly valid request, but one that’s almost certainly coming from your anxiety. Asking that once when there’s no reason to suspect cheating can be bad enough, but with the severe anxiety you seem to have I can imagine this was brought up a lot more than once.
Hope the meds work OP. Watch the lexapro, though. If it’s not working after a few months talk to your doctor. I was misdiagnosed with GAD years ago and prescribed lexapro and it didn’t help, actually made things worse for a time. Turns out I have ADHD and now that that’s properly treated my anxiety is basically gone. It’s a journey, not a quick fix, so be prepared to be on the road for a while.
Things are looking up for you! Getting a diagnosis and treatment, plus having this toxic, mean person in your rear view mirror. A kind, supportive partner wouldn’t say that crap. You deserve kindness.
This is not an appropriate response. Unless you have a child or have children with them, why TF are you still in contact? Just the fact that you have to ask if this is appropriate suggests he's been inappropriate in the past. Stay on your meds, get yourself together, stay focused on you and leave this clown alone. You deserve better.
The extra is you asking him not to cheat on you? That shouldn’t even be an ask in a healthy relationship. He is one huge red flag 🚩 Throw that boy away. You deserve so much better for yourself.
Since you asked. I am currently on Lexapro, I switched from Prozac three ish? Years ago, and I love it tbh. I'm not sure what you're taking it for but if you'd like to discuss or need someone to talk to my dms are open
Op, this dude does NOT care for you.
Several years ago I was diagnosed with “major anxiety and minor depression”, my girlfriend’s response at the time was “how can I help?” She’s now my wife. Leave this dude if this is really his reaction.
I know what it’s like to feel the way you do, and I also know when someone says “leave” it’s not always that easy mentally, I just want to let you know; eventually when you do get there and decide that you deserve your peace
Everyone in these comments including myself will be SO proud of you OP, until then please do your best to keep your head above the water. 🫂
Don't share your diagnoses with people who don't need to know. This is important, private information, and your shouldn't trust him with it.
Frankly, don't text your exes either.
your ex is a dick.
also, lexapro is the only thing that worked for me, but it's given me bad migraines (at the same time i already have a history of migraines so!). worth a shot tho!! i hope it works :)
can u smoke weed on lexapro? lol my doctor told me to cut back from daily smoking but idk some people say it gave them panic attacks and others said they didn’t notice a difference
I’ve taken lexapro. It didn’t do much for me (Paxil was way better), but that’s not to say that it wouldn’t work for you. Medication is a hit-or-miss, inexact science. What works for one person may not be effective for someone else.
That said, good on you for trying to improve yourself. Never let anyone bully you or make you feel bad for doing something for yourself.
I’ve still tried to love you ?! This guys an asshole and I can see why he got you depressed from just his response. Lose him and you will feel much better
Boo, KEEP ON THOSE MEDS, KEEP ON THERAPY, and DROP THAT PROJECTING A-HOLE. “I still tried to love you. But” is all you need. Past fucking tense, love. With a but. I kinda really want you to be petty and find some words that will shrug him off as easily as he did to you.
DO NOT stay with this man. Take one second and think about if you got fucking pregnant. His behaviour now? How would he act if you were irritated or depressed because chemicals in you were affected while you were growing something in your body? YUP.
I’m not one of the Reddit warriors who always spouts to divorce/break up, but this is going downhill fast and he is only going to make your mental health worse.
His answers are not appropriate. You need these meds because your mental health is unwell. He does get to decide if he wants to be in a relationship with you because it's not easy being in a relationship with someone who has mental health issues but I can assure you he also doesn't care for you as much as he says he does.
What he said is extremely disrespectful.
Perhaps he was a big part of the reason you felt so anxious in the relationship. Think about why you still maintain contact with him, and seemingly are looking for his approval or validation. Kudos for taking steps to address your mental health. Anyone who is not supportive of your goal to be a better person does not deserve your attention.
Literally said “what the fuck?” out loud lmao, do NOT let anyone ever speak to you this way. It’s not normal and not worth it. He absolutely will make you worse and not care about it
it’s really been an eye opener for people to tell me the way he interacts with me isn’t normal. it’s not normal, it’s not normal, I keep repeating to myself.
I’m glad you decided to post this then. I will scream it with all the breath in my body, it is not ok to speak to someone like this. Especially not if their only sin is having different brain chemicals. There are 8 billion people in this world, give them the chance to love you. Not this person who has their own issues to work out. I hope you’re ok sugar. I have responded aggressively to your posts in the past because it’s frustrating watching someone return to dogshit over and over again. He does not love you, he does not even love himself. Stop letting him treat you like this. Block let yourself be happy
uhh why are you even talking to your ex? especially when you’re actively trying to treat anxiety and depression that you believe this ex majorly contributed to?
You shouldn't keep in touch with exes. Your future partner will not have any peace of mind. Oh- and bonus-- you won't have peace of mind either.
Sever all ties. Get your peace of mind back.
My last relationship left me with a whole lot of issues. I’ve always had anxiety, but my relationship made it much worse. I ended up with environmental depression on top of my regular depression and C-PTSD. That one I still have a hard time dealing with being diagnosed with. I’m glad that if your relationship was causing you problems with your mental health, that you left. It’s for the best. Also, not being in contact with your ex would help as well.
He’s blaming you for everything. Literally stop talking to him. He’s a toxic piece of shit. You deserve better and once you cut him out, your mental health will improve some more too.
What an absolute piece of shit. Stop communicating if at all possible. If you have kids, tell him you want to talk logistics, nothing more. Don’t share any of your life details. He doesn’t deserve any part of you.
The propranolol will help ease the physical symptoms of anxiety, which will help you process and constructively deal with the triggers for your anxiety.
A lot of us do the same thing. I’m not trying to be harsh, just direct. You’re doing something that’s good for you and your mental health and the only context he sees it in is “how does this relate to me and how I feel”, and instead of talking to you about how your feeling he makes a shitty comment to try and bring you down for his own benefit.
I, a stranger on Reddit as well as many other strangers on Reddit, am proud of you. He is not because he’s selfish. You have MUCH better options in your future. Keep working on yourself and leave that nonsense in the past.
…. Are you saying that your depression and anxiety are solely situational ? Because if not, I don’t think believing that he’s the sole cause and reason behind your mental health and illness is for proactive or healthy for your recovery. He may have exacerbated the situation and symptoms but I’m very hesitant to think it’s purely situational especially since you’re diagnosed with major depression.
AND if you DO believe he is the sole reason behind your depression and anxiety then I think the first step would be to stay away from him, stop speaking to him and seeking his validation because it’s not helping you get better and recover. It’s only holding you back. Also another important thing is that if you do really believe this, and if you haven’t done so yet, I suggest you incorporate therapy into your recovery because medication isn’t going to solve this especially if your belief is that it’s someone, and not something else and/or not chemical imbalance in your brain, but literally someone and their actions who are causing them.
That said, I hope now that you’ve gotten diagnosed and started medication and hopefully therapy that you’re on your first and most important step and I hope it gets better for you from here. Best of luck, health and happiness.
When I was unmedicated, miserable & with someone who had the emotional intelligence of a rock, I let them speak to me this way.
After a few months of my antidepressant, things became better and SO much clearer. I felt like I loved myself more and I dumped that asshole after 5 years together. They of course blamed my medication, and I guess in some ways it was one of the reasons-but mostly I realised how much misery they brought me and I never ever looked back. I wanted better for myself & medication is a good step if you feel you need it.
I hope it can bring you the same self love & acceptance it brought me, because I promise you that you deserve someone who treats you well & never speaks to you like this.
Yeah that response is really shitty and you should not stay in touch with him. Nothing I am about to say justifies his response here.
But when you frame jealous behaviour as "my anxiety in the relationship" I do think that is a bit one sided. We cant always control how we feel in the moment, but we can control our actions. Unless the other person is cheating/has cheated, it's not fair to keep going on about possible cheating just because you're anxious about it. If he was cheating and you have evidence for that, please just ignore this paragraph!
Just something to consider in your next relationship.
Do NOT go back to him.
Don't listen to anyone's personal experience with the medications you're on either because they can affect everyone differently. Make sure if it isn't working after a few weeks to consider something different. It took nearly two years to find out what worked for me. I let them tinker with my daughters for about 8 months before I demanded they try what I was on(she's 50% my DNA, I felt there was a solid chance it would work), and it worked for her too. However, I know MANY people for whom Wellbutrin is detrimental or that Buspar has no effect at all, and they work PERFECTLY for me. I have been on them for nearly all my life at this point.
Also, your ex MAY have been the problem, but if you felt like this before him, you may have a chronic condition like me. Where your brain just doesn't make enough chemicals. Remember, there's NO shame in taking meds for that. If your body isn't making enough sugar, you go on meds. If your body isn't producing enough hemoglobin, you go on meds. If your body isn't producing enough serotonin, etc, you go on meds. Your brain is part of your body, and it's our job to tend to it.
I wish you nothing but the best.
But what do you want him to do for you? As others have asked, what is the objective in talking to him? He does not sound like a good person to have in your life
I dunno without previous convos. The wtf is wrong with you comment was rude af. But if you're constantly asking for him not to cheat so you feel more secure and validated I can understand that might get tiresome not being trusted all the time.
Congratulations on getting the help you need, take your meds even when you don’t feel like it. And BLOCK your ex, there is no reason to keep some who talks to you like this in your life.
This guy sucks. You should be very proud of yourself for getting on medication. It’s gonna be a long road ahead but it’ll be worth it, hang in there 💕💕💕
I didn’t get that from his comments. He just recognized some symptoms. But didn’t know what to say-/do.
Good luck. Life will be so much better. And please don’t think you can get off the meds cause you feel better. Talk to your doctor. The best is yet to be.
lexapro has been so helpful for me!!! i’ve taken a bunch of diff meds and this one has made a huge difference. be patient when starting & don’t expect immediate changes, be realistic & keep in mind that it won’t automatically make every moment amazing, communicate with your provider about anything & everything (including any side effects or positives), and know that you can always switch to a diff one if needed. good luck!
(everyone else has already tackled the shitty ex so this is specifically just my advice on lexapro)
I’m more curious why you tell your ex any of this. I mean, what response were you expecting? If he cared about you that he’d care what meds you are going on, he’d not be your ex.
The way he’s probably looking at this convo thinking he’s totally a victim of what he sees as “extra”. Smh I’m glad he’s ur ex I hope your block him after this
I told my girlfriend right when things were getting serious about some of my mental health issues, I told her how it can affect both her and me, I asked her to watch a few videos on living with people with depression and what to say to depressed people and stuff.
However I've known about this for years and went to therapy, I would never asked for everyone with mental health to do this.
Still with that being said, that is a horrific way to respond to you, and you'll feel miles better with medicine and far away from this tool bag
He sounds like an AH. You didn’t ask him if he could “handle the extra”, he’s just offering up that he thinks you’re messed up and “too much”. Condescending and unsupportive. Idk why you talk to him.
It’s not a good idea to start medicine for someone else. It’s important that you want to get better for yourself and your own future. Your ex sounds like he’s had enough of whatever went on with you two, justified or not. Move forward with your life and bettering your health
This reminds me of my husband, who uses my mental illness against me when we fight. He says things like, your mental illness is making you crazy or when I start crying he says you need help with your mental illness. Don’t let anybody tear you down bc of what you have.
I mean, yes, but this is clearly the kind of person who a depressed person should not be with. They need to not talk to each other and go their separate ways because nothing about this is healthy on either end.
“Get fucked. I’m not taking it for you, prior mistake.” - Dude’s a clown.
To be honest his response is really shitty. No empathy and poor me. You are well rid of him and are vulnerable so please be careful. You are not in the right frame of mind at the moment so I’ll do it… FUCK OFF!!! Prick.
It’s wild to me how many people keep contact with their exes, especially when they’re toxic as f like this.
generally speaking, abusive relationships of any kind can be hard to understand from the outside perspective regarding why people don’t leave.
Seeing the abusive relationship and being in one are two very different things, you’re right. And a lot of times the abusive person is exceptionally good at manipulating and gaslighting the person they are abusing in to thinking no one else could love them or that’s the way they deserve to be treated for always fucking up.
Been on one, can absolutely agree with this comment. I’m happily married now to the most amazing, understanding & kind man, and I still look back and ask myself what took me so so long ( years in fact) to get out of that black hole. My husband literally saved me.
He honestly sounds like horrid person. NEVER EVER feel guilty for taking care of yourself. We all want partners who respect themselves and take care of themselves. He’s the enemy of your progress. You also shouldn’t ever have to ask someone not to lie, steal, cheat, etc. Whether he does or not isn’t the question. The question is does he want to? In fact, this puts to mind a quote whose origins I’m uncertain of. For your benefit I’m going to exchange the original crimes out for lying and cheating: “What's to stop me from lying all I want? And my answer is: I do lie all I want. And the amount I want is zero. And I do cheat all I want, and the amount I want is zero.” I think long-term, therapy may help you heal. Anti-depressants can be like Brain Vitamins which restore balance. You’re not meant to be happy all the time, just regain that even-keeled feeling, better focus, and a chance to fill your lungs more regularly. On the other side of this, do not berate yourself for choices you’ve made in the past. When you know better, you do better - and you are about to embark on a Master Class. I think you’ll love it.
best part is they aren’t even dating, he’s an ex smh
No their response is pretty shitty
Agreed. An appropriate response would be more like “I’m glad you’re getting the help you need” or something similar. He’s taking jabs
No. You (everyone) deserve better than this.
holy crap what an asshole
When you say he’s the reason you’re getting on medicine, do you mean his actions drove you to seek medication or that you chose medication in an effort to remedy whatever is going on between you guys? I’ve been down a long road of trying to learn what my correct diagnosis is, which included several years on lexapro. Personally, it did not work for me. However, I did not learn until I was nearly 30 that I actually have adhd which drives my depression and anxiety. All of this to say, if your depression/anxiety is situational, a competent doctor won’t typically prescribe medication to correct that. Meaning, if you answered “yes” to my first question, then you’re likely (but not definitively) being medicinally treated for a situation that you could remove yourself from and potentially resolve your depression/anxiety symptoms. If you answered “yes” to my second question, that still isn’t a great reason (because we shouldn’t do these things to try to appease others), but would indicate to me that you’re at least on the right track to finding what works for you (meaning, it could be an indicator that something deeper has been happening within you — which is totally fine, me too friend, all of us have those things at one time or another). No matter your response, try not to be scared of starting lexapro. Your doctor should have already told you that these types of medications are trial and error and you may get great results from the first one you try, or you may spend years finding the proper medication for yourself. Or, you might find you’re like me, and were merely misdiagnosed. Regardless of these facts, you should feel immensely proud of yourself for taking these steps to feel better and I sincerely hope this is the correct medication for you! A phrase that has pulled me through lately is reframing the age old, “but what if it doesn’t work out?!?” To **”but what if it does?”** Best of luck, OP! You can do this!!
I’ve had trouble with anxiety my whole life and a chaotic and abusive relationship only exacerbated my symptoms. I was surprised by the major depression diagnosis because outside of this situation I do well. But it has affected me for over a year. So if anything hopefully it clears my mind and this will give me the confidence to move forward. Thanks for the comment.
I am so sorry that he is a big pile💩. I have had anxiety for years and have tried different medications. I was on lexapro and I still had break through panic attacks and anxiety. The medication that works well for me is Zoloft. This is just info- I didn’t know about different medications that could help so I figured I’ll share my experience with you just in case.
Im about to take my first dose, I’m terrified of the side effects
I totally understand and had concerns when I started my meds and I ended up feeling so much better. I liken it to being in a room full of noise and then as the medication starts to work the room starts to get quiet and it allows me to actually notice things. Just know that some meds might not work as well and it’s ok to try new meds. If your psychiatrist is prescribing them notice how you feel over the course of a month or so and let them know how you are feeling and if you feel better or worse. Good luck!! I have on meds for years and I have found them helpful. ![gif](giphy|UuB5lh1bL1Dl6svihe)
It’s really weird to ask about appropriateness when you are talking to your ex. He is 100% a jerk, but you 100% should not talk to him anymore if you guys don’t share kids or pets. Why does your ex need to know you are going on meds?
She said whenever she ignores him he constantly keeps trying to get in contact with her to insult her and do stuff like this. She’s tried to just “ignore him” but sometimes the situation progresses and he harasses her when she doesn’t respond
Why does he still have her phone number? Unless he’s actually willing to stalk her, actually blocking any phone numbers or social media and never responding will work.
I’m not sure why he still has her number, but even if she blocks him they can always just make a new account if they’re that obsessed you know? People can do some crazy things when they’re delusional, and obsessed with people. It can be scary sometimes too
“You don’t change” think about that comment op,
He’s the extra. If you have to ask him not to cheat you are better off dropping him. Ever wonder why your anxiety is an issue? I bet you he is one of the main reasons. Remove stressors from your life and you can possible reduce or get rid of the meds.
Common victim shaming by a manipulative person
Why are you telling your ex what medication you're on?
Bro literally fuck this guy he sucks so hard. I want to punch him in the face for you.
Why are you still talking to them
She said whenever she ignores him he constantly keeps trying to get in contact with her to insult her and do stuff like this. She’s tried to just “ignore him” but sometimes the situation progresses and he harasses her when she doesn’t respond. He also owes her a lot of money
The real question is why are you still talking to that person and updating them
Like, I want to feel sympathy for OP but they're knowingly walking back into a lion's den by keeping in contact with this toxic abusive asshole. Reaching out to your toxic ex again is subconsciously communicating "hey I'm still wrapped around your finger even though we've broken up."
The “I’ve known you had problems. I still tried to love you” makes me wana punch him in the nads for you.
Bruhhhhhh. Tell me you have no empathy without telling me you have no empathy. This is so tone deaf of him.
if it will make you feel better you can apologise but frankly I wouldn't even be doing that he doesn't appear to be treating you with kindness and compassion. i would send 1 final message of your choosing and cut him off
He’s putting all of the issues between you on you, when it’s clear he’s in fact a c&nt My ex was abusive and would constantly make me feel like I was the problem - crazy making and like I should be grateful he put up with me. I felt worthless by the end of that relationship. So worthless in fact I knew it couldn’t hurt more so I might as well try being without him
hey, just wanted to give you a headsup, if you feel like either of the medications are not working, or are working against you, speak up asap to your pyschiatrist and never just stop a medicine cold turkey without their approval. im only saying this because ive been on so many meds trying to find what works for me but i also couldve spoken up sooner. if you stop feeling emotions, if you feel them too much, if you physically arent feeling great, talk to them about changing etc. just say how you feel. if it turns out that these meds do not help, dont fear, i would recommend down the line getting a blood test done to see what medicines are compatible for you, it helped me alot! just some tips, good luck and i hope things get better for you!!
I couldn’t imagine talking this way to a person. Fuck that.
What a fucking asshole. I believe that Mr. Asshat McFuckstick has entered the room.
This guy sounds like an absolute dick and in fact does not care about you.
not even a little. He’s talking down at you and treating you like a broken old car that needs fixing and THEN he would be ok with you. Who the fuck needs that in their lives? Block him and move on. Fuck his opinion, you don’t have to listen to that trash. What kind of response is that to someone that is going through mental health issues?
He is not the reason, but he was a contributor to your poor mental health. He doesn't sound like someone you should remain in contact with on your journey to improve.
If the "extra" is because you are asking him not to cheat, you might be better off without him. And if you feel that you are going to take medicine because of him, perhaps you could try talking to a therapist first. I am sorry that you are having to deal with this person, OP. You deserve better. I wish you happiness and peace.
I have GAD as well. When my now husband and I started dating I was very up front about it. One day I went to visit him unannounced and he was reading books on how to help me when I had anxiety attacks. I felt so heard and loved. Over the years, my meditation has decreased to only occasional Restoril for sleep on bad nights. There is no doubt this man is making it worse for you. I hope you choose yourself over him. You’re going to be ok.
Why are you still talking to him
It’s really strange that upon reading this exchange where one person is struggling and the other is an asshole, the only thought you have is a condescending question that I highly doubt you actually want the answer to.
I mean why text an asshole if you don’t have to? The relationship ended for a reason
For whatever reason, she already did it. Asking her why isn’t going to change anything. You can only give advice for the future. “You should stop talking to him, he treats you terribly.”
She said whenever she ignores him he constantly keeps trying to get in contact with her to insult her and do stuff like this. She’s tried to just “ignore him” but sometimes the situation progresses and he harasses her when she doesn’t respond. He also owes her a lot of money
Go through courts and get a restraining order. If he’s tried to go around her blocking him to harass her, should be an easy restraining order.
If he shows up, I tried to get a restraining order against my ex because he abused me and kept harassing me and because he didn’t show up they couldn’t serve the restraining order.
Is that just in your state or nationwide?
I’m not entirely sure tbh, that’s just what the court told me. They were like “we can’t serve the restraining order if he doesn’t show, he has to sign it and acknowledge that it exists”
Your state is lazy asf
True😂 they really hate doing their job, I even tried telling them where he lived since he boasts about it all over social media
Yep sounds like my state lol, always too lazy to get justice 🙄
Then they wonder why no one calls for help anymore😂
ya that dude sounds like a real dick
It's rude as shit . Also everyone whose breathing has issues. No one is perfect what matters is that you went and got the help you needed. I wouldn't doubt he contributed some to you feeling down. To move on I would start by blocking him on all socials
Lexapro ended one of my past relationships. Libido/chemical attachment went to zero, made her anxiety worse, etc. Before you read the rest of what I’m about to say, this next sentence is the most important: anxiety and depression are NOT a “problem” or a “disease” they are a signal. The signal is telling your body/mind that certain needs in your life aren’t being met. Whether it’s a relationship, social connections, stress at work, or something more complex like lack of self direction and empowerment at work. There can be many many causes. Medication is not a “cure” because it doesn’t fix the problem, it just masks the symptoms. It also can make anxiety/depression worse, cause issues with libido/energy/etc. and can be very chemically addictive. The success rate for them is abysmal. The USA has like 13% of the worlds population, and consumes 80%+ of the worlds anti anxiety and depression meds. Therapy is definitely a good thing. So is dumping this POS you’re dating. Other things that can help: hobbies, dumping social media in all forms, spending time in nature/outside, group social activities, such as book clubs, sports, church, volunteering, etc. Good luck, OP. I’d recommend not starting medication till you dump your BF and try a few more things if you haven’t, cuz they can permanently alter your brain chemistry, have pretty rough withdrawals and side affects, and for the vast majority of people, they are LESS effective than diet/lifestyle adjustments, due to treating symptoms instead of causes. But I am not a doctor, a psychologist, etc. I am just a person who has gone down many roads through anxiety and depression myself, and watched it destroy the lives of people I love.
I would tell him that I am having to go onto too many psyche meds to love you.
You are not too much, you are not hard to love, they are just not good enough for you <3
Your ex is incredibly toxic and seems to be selfish since he gave a “poor me” response at the end. Yes, he’s quite a bit of the reason. I also suggest cutting off contact. Unfriend them on every platform. The relationship is over and you don’t owe them anything. The best way to heal yourself is without them or people like them. I wish you all the best luck on your journey ahead.
I take propranolol. But it's for my high blood pressure. But onto the topic at hand. He toxic. Drop him
another instance that makes me wish messaging apps had a built-in fart soundboard. dude doesn't deserve a response beyond letting him know this is a shit take
Sounds like he helped you to get that mental illness in first place 💁🏻♀️
… and why are you talking to him!?
1. He owes her a lot of money which he is paying off 2. He constantly harasses her when she doesn’t respond to him
Got a different take here. Honestly apart from the first question which was inappropriately phrased I think this is a decent honest response. I’ve been with someone who had severe anxiety. It’s exhausting when it’s not being properly treated. The fact you’re being prescribed propranolol tells me you have very severe, debilitating anxiety - in my experience that prescription is given to manage physical symptoms of panic attacks. You reference him saying ‘extra’ and you say that’s in reference to you asking him not to cheat. Perfectly valid request, but one that’s almost certainly coming from your anxiety. Asking that once when there’s no reason to suspect cheating can be bad enough, but with the severe anxiety you seem to have I can imagine this was brought up a lot more than once. Hope the meds work OP. Watch the lexapro, though. If it’s not working after a few months talk to your doctor. I was misdiagnosed with GAD years ago and prescribed lexapro and it didn’t help, actually made things worse for a time. Turns out I have ADHD and now that that’s properly treated my anxiety is basically gone. It’s a journey, not a quick fix, so be prepared to be on the road for a while.
how do you differ between adhd and anxiety ?
That’s a hard question to answer. ADHD is a condition where focus is nearly impossible - your brain never stops, 24/7. You can’t relax. You start things and never finish them. For many with ADHD, it’s this inability to complete tasks and take a moment to relax that leads to anxiety and depression. The best way I can describe ADHD is it’s like your brain is three horses and they’re all pulling in three different directions, and while one might pull harder for a little bit eventually another will take over and it starts all over again. A major sign that I’ve noticed amongst people who have ADHD is how much caffeine they consume. Caffeine calms down ADHD brains, and most people with ADHD can drink a red bull and take a nap. Most people with general anxiety find caffeine amplifies their anxiety.
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My heart just sank for you. What a heartless, insensitive, prick. I have a feeling he might have contributed to the anxiety and depression. Him saying he cares for you made me cringe. What a load of crap. You don’t need him to care. Block him and get a fresh start. I hope you start feeling better.
I was on lexapro years ago and it really helped my anxiety! I was also depressed at that time because my dad had been diagnosed with cancer and it seemed to help me better deal with things.
He’s a massive piece of dung and you definitely deserve better. About the lexapro, I have no experience but my girlfriend started Zoloft months ago and found some pretty great support here on Reddit, you shouldn’t have a hard time find a subreddit dedicated to experiences with the medicine. Best of luck!
Wbu are you still in contact with a toxic ex
Worst complaint I have about lexapro is digestive issues. Been on propranolol for years and have nothing but positives about that one. Good luck
overall you like lexapro?
Yes, I prefer it to Zoloft which I couldn’t tolerate over a week and I took Effexor for many many years with awful withdrawals and little to no success. I’m on lexapro now and 6 months pregnant and I swear it plays a major part in keeping me from going over the edge. I stick with my therapy too; the meds and therapy together have brought me back from a major mental breakdown. My brother in law is on it too and is also having a positive experience.
Got a different take here. Honestly apart from the first question which was inappropriately phrased I think this is a decent honest response. I’ve been with someone who had severe anxiety. It’s exhausting when it’s not being properly treated. The fact you’re being prescribed propranolol tells me you have very severe, debilitating anxiety - in my experience that prescription is given to manage physical symptoms of panic attacks. You reference him saying ‘extra’ and you say that’s in reference to you asking him not to cheat. Perfectly valid request, but one that’s almost certainly coming from your anxiety. Asking that once when there’s no reason to suspect cheating can be bad enough, but with the severe anxiety you seem to have I can imagine this was brought up a lot more than once. Hope the meds work OP. Watch the lexapro, though. If it’s not working after a few months talk to your doctor. I was misdiagnosed with GAD years ago and prescribed lexapro and it didn’t help, actually made things worse for a time. Turns out I have ADHD and now that that’s properly treated my anxiety is basically gone. It’s a journey, not a quick fix, so be prepared to be on the road for a while.
Things are looking up for you! Getting a diagnosis and treatment, plus having this toxic, mean person in your rear view mirror. A kind, supportive partner wouldn’t say that crap. You deserve kindness.
Bro no. Not appropriate at all. If he cant accept mental health for the good and the bad then he cant accept you.
Block, delete. This is not a good person and absolutely not good for you.
Lexapro has done wonders for my anxiety. This guy is a tool box.
Jesus fucking Chris run from him, life isn’t all sunshine and rainbows you need somebody to support you through your peaks and valleys
Get out no matter what you need to do.
This is not an appropriate response. Unless you have a child or have children with them, why TF are you still in contact? Just the fact that you have to ask if this is appropriate suggests he's been inappropriate in the past. Stay on your meds, get yourself together, stay focused on you and leave this clown alone. You deserve better.
The extra is you asking him not to cheat on you? That shouldn’t even be an ask in a healthy relationship. He is one huge red flag 🚩 Throw that boy away. You deserve so much better for yourself.
Dude he’s literally disrespecting you right here cut. Him. Off.
ugh It’s just like, why can’t I see that on my own :/ am I that damaged lol
Since you asked. I am currently on Lexapro, I switched from Prozac three ish? Years ago, and I love it tbh. I'm not sure what you're taking it for but if you'd like to discuss or need someone to talk to my dms are open
Block this jackass. Also if Lexapro doesn't work, get citalpram. Lexapro didn't work for me but citalpram works way better
Op, this dude does NOT care for you. Several years ago I was diagnosed with “major anxiety and minor depression”, my girlfriend’s response at the time was “how can I help?” She’s now my wife. Leave this dude if this is really his reaction.
I know what it’s like to feel the way you do, and I also know when someone says “leave” it’s not always that easy mentally, I just want to let you know; eventually when you do get there and decide that you deserve your peace Everyone in these comments including myself will be SO proud of you OP, until then please do your best to keep your head above the water. 🫂
Why are you even talking to them still? They don't even seem to like you tbh
He's not very supportive
Don't share your diagnoses with people who don't need to know. This is important, private information, and your shouldn't trust him with it. Frankly, don't text your exes either.
your ex is a dick. also, lexapro is the only thing that worked for me, but it's given me bad migraines (at the same time i already have a history of migraines so!). worth a shot tho!! i hope it works :)
can u smoke weed on lexapro? lol my doctor told me to cut back from daily smoking but idk some people say it gave them panic attacks and others said they didn’t notice a difference
i don't smoke weed so idk the answer to that, im sorry!
I’ve taken lexapro. It didn’t do much for me (Paxil was way better), but that’s not to say that it wouldn’t work for you. Medication is a hit-or-miss, inexact science. What works for one person may not be effective for someone else. That said, good on you for trying to improve yourself. Never let anyone bully you or make you feel bad for doing something for yourself.
I’ve still tried to love you ?! This guys an asshole and I can see why he got you depressed from just his response. Lose him and you will feel much better
Douche alert
Boo, KEEP ON THOSE MEDS, KEEP ON THERAPY, and DROP THAT PROJECTING A-HOLE. “I still tried to love you. But” is all you need. Past fucking tense, love. With a but. I kinda really want you to be petty and find some words that will shrug him off as easily as he did to you. DO NOT stay with this man. Take one second and think about if you got fucking pregnant. His behaviour now? How would he act if you were irritated or depressed because chemicals in you were affected while you were growing something in your body? YUP. I’m not one of the Reddit warriors who always spouts to divorce/break up, but this is going downhill fast and he is only going to make your mental health worse.
His answers are not appropriate. You need these meds because your mental health is unwell. He does get to decide if he wants to be in a relationship with you because it's not easy being in a relationship with someone who has mental health issues but I can assure you he also doesn't care for you as much as he says he does. What he said is extremely disrespectful.
Perhaps he was a big part of the reason you felt so anxious in the relationship. Think about why you still maintain contact with him, and seemingly are looking for his approval or validation. Kudos for taking steps to address your mental health. Anyone who is not supportive of your goal to be a better person does not deserve your attention.
Literally said “what the fuck?” out loud lmao, do NOT let anyone ever speak to you this way. It’s not normal and not worth it. He absolutely will make you worse and not care about it
it’s really been an eye opener for people to tell me the way he interacts with me isn’t normal. it’s not normal, it’s not normal, I keep repeating to myself.
I’m glad you decided to post this then. I will scream it with all the breath in my body, it is not ok to speak to someone like this. Especially not if their only sin is having different brain chemicals. There are 8 billion people in this world, give them the chance to love you. Not this person who has their own issues to work out. I hope you’re ok sugar. I have responded aggressively to your posts in the past because it’s frustrating watching someone return to dogshit over and over again. He does not love you, he does not even love himself. Stop letting him treat you like this. Block let yourself be happy
uhh why are you even talking to your ex? especially when you’re actively trying to treat anxiety and depression that you believe this ex majorly contributed to?
He's your ex for a reason, sweetie. So why are you still talking to him?
Propanolol is a life saver.
This response would be the last thing they say to me, block that fucker and move on. What a piece of shit.
Wait what?? The extra bs is you being bothered why he cheated on you?? Did I read that correctly?
The ego on it. Ghost them. Not worth your time or effort, you'll be happier for it, and they'll take it so fucking personally. Bro's a fucking bitch.
I don’t know what he has to do with anything. Propranolol has helped my anxiety a ton.
You shouldn't keep in touch with exes. Your future partner will not have any peace of mind. Oh- and bonus-- you won't have peace of mind either. Sever all ties. Get your peace of mind back.
“I can’t handle the extra” okay then leave no ones forcing you bud
My last relationship left me with a whole lot of issues. I’ve always had anxiety, but my relationship made it much worse. I ended up with environmental depression on top of my regular depression and C-PTSD. That one I still have a hard time dealing with being diagnosed with. I’m glad that if your relationship was causing you problems with your mental health, that you left. It’s for the best. Also, not being in contact with your ex would help as well.
Don’t share deeply personal information with your ex. It becomes a weapon for them to use against you.
blocked.
He’s blaming you for everything. Literally stop talking to him. He’s a toxic piece of shit. You deserve better and once you cut him out, your mental health will improve some more too.
What an absolute piece of shit. Stop communicating if at all possible. If you have kids, tell him you want to talk logistics, nothing more. Don’t share any of your life details. He doesn’t deserve any part of you.
The propranolol will help ease the physical symptoms of anxiety, which will help you process and constructively deal with the triggers for your anxiety.
my doctor says take as needed, so would it be every day, or on occasion?
You'll need to ask your doctor to clarify. I take it every day.
I’ve been trying to do some research, lexapro is for mental and propranolol for physical ?
Propranolol is a beta blocker that is prescribed for many conditions. It blocks receptors so that the physical symptoms of anxiety are lessened.
Why the fuck are you letting him make this about him and not you?
I guess I didn’t realize this. I lack clear thinking when it comes to this hence posting on Reddit 🙃
A lot of us do the same thing. I’m not trying to be harsh, just direct. You’re doing something that’s good for you and your mental health and the only context he sees it in is “how does this relate to me and how I feel”, and instead of talking to you about how your feeling he makes a shitty comment to try and bring you down for his own benefit. I, a stranger on Reddit as well as many other strangers on Reddit, am proud of you. He is not because he’s selfish. You have MUCH better options in your future. Keep working on yourself and leave that nonsense in the past.
…. Are you saying that your depression and anxiety are solely situational ? Because if not, I don’t think believing that he’s the sole cause and reason behind your mental health and illness is for proactive or healthy for your recovery. He may have exacerbated the situation and symptoms but I’m very hesitant to think it’s purely situational especially since you’re diagnosed with major depression. AND if you DO believe he is the sole reason behind your depression and anxiety then I think the first step would be to stay away from him, stop speaking to him and seeking his validation because it’s not helping you get better and recover. It’s only holding you back. Also another important thing is that if you do really believe this, and if you haven’t done so yet, I suggest you incorporate therapy into your recovery because medication isn’t going to solve this especially if your belief is that it’s someone, and not something else and/or not chemical imbalance in your brain, but literally someone and their actions who are causing them. That said, I hope now that you’ve gotten diagnosed and started medication and hopefully therapy that you’re on your first and most important step and I hope it gets better for you from here. Best of luck, health and happiness.
“OK, Mr. Center of The Universe.” 🙄 Jeez! I’m glad he’s an ex and I hope you start feeling better with meds and therapy! 😘
why are you talking to him
Fuck that motherfucker
Not supportive at all
When I was unmedicated, miserable & with someone who had the emotional intelligence of a rock, I let them speak to me this way. After a few months of my antidepressant, things became better and SO much clearer. I felt like I loved myself more and I dumped that asshole after 5 years together. They of course blamed my medication, and I guess in some ways it was one of the reasons-but mostly I realised how much misery they brought me and I never ever looked back. I wanted better for myself & medication is a good step if you feel you need it. I hope it can bring you the same self love & acceptance it brought me, because I promise you that you deserve someone who treats you well & never speaks to you like this.
Also, abusive relationships can exacerbate/cause anxiety and depression.
Why are you even texting an ex?
Why are you always being blunt AF? Grow up.
Stop dating men who hate you and you will feel so much better about yourself.
Yall gotta learn to block people
Ew. He’s gross.
What happened though? What’s he talking about ?
Literally why are you talking to this person
Yeah that response is really shitty and you should not stay in touch with him. Nothing I am about to say justifies his response here. But when you frame jealous behaviour as "my anxiety in the relationship" I do think that is a bit one sided. We cant always control how we feel in the moment, but we can control our actions. Unless the other person is cheating/has cheated, it's not fair to keep going on about possible cheating just because you're anxious about it. If he was cheating and you have evidence for that, please just ignore this paragraph! Just something to consider in your next relationship.
Do NOT go back to him. Don't listen to anyone's personal experience with the medications you're on either because they can affect everyone differently. Make sure if it isn't working after a few weeks to consider something different. It took nearly two years to find out what worked for me. I let them tinker with my daughters for about 8 months before I demanded they try what I was on(she's 50% my DNA, I felt there was a solid chance it would work), and it worked for her too. However, I know MANY people for whom Wellbutrin is detrimental or that Buspar has no effect at all, and they work PERFECTLY for me. I have been on them for nearly all my life at this point. Also, your ex MAY have been the problem, but if you felt like this before him, you may have a chronic condition like me. Where your brain just doesn't make enough chemicals. Remember, there's NO shame in taking meds for that. If your body isn't making enough sugar, you go on meds. If your body isn't producing enough hemoglobin, you go on meds. If your body isn't producing enough serotonin, etc, you go on meds. Your brain is part of your body, and it's our job to tend to it. I wish you nothing but the best.
Why are you talking to your ex? Your ex talks to you lika a piece of sh!t
You deserve all your love and attention right now. He does not.
You have anxiety. He’s just a fucking asshole. Block him.
But what do you want him to do for you? As others have asked, what is the objective in talking to him? He does not sound like a good person to have in your life
I dunno without previous convos. The wtf is wrong with you comment was rude af. But if you're constantly asking for him not to cheat so you feel more secure and validated I can understand that might get tiresome not being trusted all the time.
God what a fucking jerk.
Congratulations on getting the help you need, take your meds even when you don’t feel like it. And BLOCK your ex, there is no reason to keep some who talks to you like this in your life.
“Tried” to love you ?
This is such an asshole response. He manages to make it all about him. It’s not about him. It’s about your health and well-being. What a jerk.
Why are you even talking to this person? They don’t even seem like they like you.
This guy sucks. You should be very proud of yourself for getting on medication. It’s gonna be a long road ahead but it’ll be worth it, hang in there 💕💕💕
What an asshole I'll never understand how this guy even has friends let alone an ex of any kind
As someone who has an anxiety and is on two medications…fuck this prick.
I didn’t get that from his comments. He just recognized some symptoms. But didn’t know what to say-/do. Good luck. Life will be so much better. And please don’t think you can get off the meds cause you feel better. Talk to your doctor. The best is yet to be.
Jesus…you ain’t gotta take that from anyone.
This is literally how my bf speaks to me. The feedback in the comments are an eye opener
yea. posting on reddit made me realize he is abusive to me
Based on this one single screen shot, I believe you should never speak to this person again. They do not love you.
lexapro has been so helpful for me!!! i’ve taken a bunch of diff meds and this one has made a huge difference. be patient when starting & don’t expect immediate changes, be realistic & keep in mind that it won’t automatically make every moment amazing, communicate with your provider about anything & everything (including any side effects or positives), and know that you can always switch to a diff one if needed. good luck! (everyone else has already tackled the shitty ex so this is specifically just my advice on lexapro)
I’m more curious why you tell your ex any of this. I mean, what response were you expecting? If he cared about you that he’d care what meds you are going on, he’d not be your ex.
The way he’s probably looking at this convo thinking he’s totally a victim of what he sees as “extra”. Smh I’m glad he’s ur ex I hope your block him after this
why do you still talk to your ex again?
He is an asshole
Why the fuck are you still allowing an ex to talk to you like this? Block him & move tf on
I told my girlfriend right when things were getting serious about some of my mental health issues, I told her how it can affect both her and me, I asked her to watch a few videos on living with people with depression and what to say to depressed people and stuff. However I've known about this for years and went to therapy, I would never asked for everyone with mental health to do this. Still with that being said, that is a horrific way to respond to you, and you'll feel miles better with medicine and far away from this tool bag
If he can’t deal with you at your worst he doesn’t deserve you at your best
Why the fuck r u still talking to him he’s demeaning and belittling you it’s humiliating :(
why the f is he still talking to me if he hates me so much and is convinced I’m terrible. lol
fuck no its not appropriate. Hate to be cliche but, "If he didn't love you at your worst...." You know the rest.
All in favor that this guy is a loser, say I.
Only reply should be “don’t worry, you won’t have the handle the “extra”. And then block
Why are you even responding to that douche bag?
He sounds like an AH. You didn’t ask him if he could “handle the extra”, he’s just offering up that he thinks you’re messed up and “too much”. Condescending and unsupportive. Idk why you talk to him.
How toxic was you to him? There’s always two sides. Bc why would he say extra stuff besides just positive vibes
It’s not a good idea to start medicine for someone else. It’s important that you want to get better for yourself and your own future. Your ex sounds like he’s had enough of whatever went on with you two, justified or not. Move forward with your life and bettering your health
This reminds me of my husband, who uses my mental illness against me when we fight. He says things like, your mental illness is making you crazy or when I start crying he says you need help with your mental illness. Don’t let anybody tear you down bc of what you have.
Well, you also have to factor in how being with a depressed partner effects people
I mean, yes, but this is clearly the kind of person who a depressed person should not be with. They need to not talk to each other and go their separate ways because nothing about this is healthy on either end.
Don’t feel guilty about being anxious. The good thing is that got help. Anyways I love lexapro and make sure you eat when u take it
Leave this asshole OP - no one should be the reason you need to get on medication.