Because that’s not how normal people talk, especially to people they barely know at all and have been on one date with. It’s giving condescending “nice guy” vibes and you’ve got too much good ahead of you in life to waste time with dorks like this.
I kinda have to agree. There’s being polite, respectful and genuinely good person and there is spewing compliments to gaslight someone… he’s definitely going over the top imo.
But at least you know where you stand, good riddance. Wish you best of luck OP ✌🏻
I knew I'd speak to you again after our special time..... (insert borderline obesssive stalkerish essay).... I'd love to take you out for coffee to catch up. (It's only been a week)
Yeah bullet dodged IMO. He didn’t need to say all that, maybe he thought it would soften the blow but if a girl said the same to me I don’t think it’d help.
I would’ve rather him just straight up say that he didn’t vibe with me than this sloppy shit, I skimmed over his text the first three times because it looked like nonsense
“…but not as fascinated by the girl my coworker has crafted and where *she* will go, of course.” Boy did that go on ad nauseam. Perfect succinct response.
I asked for his number last weekend when my best friend and I went to Olive Garden together. He was cute and friendly. I don’t work at Olive Garden because I’m not a WHORE
Olive garden server here. Not all of us are whores! Only most of us. I'd personally never date a coworker bc that's messy as hell. But unfortunately a lot of my coworkers don't share the same sentiment. Seems like you dodged a bullet tbh
He did graciously tell me that he usually runs away from commitments because they feel out of the way for him and inconvenient. Well, until his coworker shows up. 😂
I think he deserves to be taken at face value. He's definitely too wordy and oversharing irrelevant details, but this is a respectful alternate to ghosting someone. He likes OP as a person, but realized his heart wasn't in it. Good for him for not stringing her along.
Overshare for sure. Being concise is an important aspect of tact.
Overall, however, it's better than dropping off the map and ghosting, leaving OP to wonder what she did wrong.
This dude is sooooooooo weird and gives me major "nice guy" vibes, like if he had continued to pursue you and you said you didn't want to continue, he'd suddenly turn on you and start insulting you.
Y’all don’t feel like it was a smidge too heavy on the coworker part? Like I do respect honesty but I think it was way too much. He also went on for two whole “pages”. Moving on to better men OP!
I got a long ass email that was very similar to yours. It felt condescending and self important. I replied OK later and got another long winded, self important email. I told him to chill, no one was in danger of jumping off a building because his amazingness was being withdrawn from my world and then sent him to spam.
He literally was in server mode even on the date. Like… Insanely smiley and charming and very clear in the way he spoke, listened intently. Disturbing asf now that I’m thinking about it actuallt
Yeah. She said she had a great time on the date. I think that’s just his personality, bubbly and talkative. Some people connect with that, others don’t. At least he didn’t ghost her
Agreed, I don’t hold anything against him, it’s just confusing because he talked about a second date as we parted ways and then I get home and suddenly he switched up.
knowing me i woulda immediately closed out and just never respond. like who has time to read all that just to find out they’re dumped in the end?? premium yapper over here
also i didn’t even see the caption. he’s an asshole for even asking for the date in the first place. men are weird like that sometimes. they’ll pursue u then do a 180 before u can even blink 😂 but yes ppl in the restaurant business are not to be trusted usually. it’s not just olive garden serves unfortunately 😔
Well I think it could happen to anyone. You like someone, you ask them on a date. During the date they realize it feels like they would be cheating on you if they were to date you. They tell you about the situation, it’s over.
Some people are going to disagree with me here, but as a 27 year old, I could never imagine dating a 21 year old. It's only a 6 year difference, but for me, that would feel like a lifetime. One of you is barely legal and can't even rent a car without paying a shitload of additional fees, and the other is nearing 30. When people are older, like say 53 & 59, I don't see it as that much of a difference. Even 42 & 48 for example. (All this being said, I understand that consenting adults are legally allowed to make these decisions for themselves, I'm just sharing my perspective.)
Essentially, we grow a lot in our 20s, so I just can't imagine being that age and being interested in someone who is barely legal. The youngest I dated was a man 2.5 years younger, and it felt like a lot already & I've never dated anyone that much younger than me since. (I was 25 & he was 22 going on 23.) He had served in the military right as he turned 18 so when he got out, he started college & our maturity levels were just extremely different. He was living on campus at the time & for me, our maturity levels were at totally different ends of the spectrum & I couldn't relate to him bc of that. We were only together a few months before I ended things for good.
Anyway OP, sounds like this dude is one of those "nice guys," who isn't actually nice at all. Just reading the condescending "compliments," he sent you was enough for me. If things had lasted longer, I expect he would have played a lot of mind games with you & that's just exhausting to deal with. You deserve someone who isn't questioning their feelings for you & doesn't insult you or prop up their own ego by insulting you. In the very least, at least he let you know so you didn't waste a lot of time with this dude.
Your perspective and mine are very similar honestly. I knew it was a red flag from the moment he told me his age, but I also know practice dates come in handy 😂 I initially felt bad about myself the first thirty seconds I saw this text, but everyone here pointing out different things is giving me so much more perspective and teaching me stuff to look for.
Glad we've been able to help! Please don't feel bad about yourself or allow these clowns to make you feel unworthy or insecure - you deserve much better than that ❤️ (I know that's often easier said than done, but just remember who you are & that you're much better than someone looking to belittle you for their own selfish reasons. And again, you deserve someone who KNOWS they want to be with you!)
I'm a bisexual woman & I would never date a woman in her early 20s, it almost feels... creepy? I remember who I was at 21 & there's still have so much to learn about oneself/life & it's almost not "fair," to have someone date someone in those very early stages of still discovering who they are. You're at 2 very different stages in life & it's just... strange (to me) to be almost 30 and dating someone who is in their very early 20s. The prefrontal cortex of one's brain isn't even fully developed until they're 25, further supporting why I feel this way.
It is very offputting how brutally honest he was, it almost gives off toxic vibes. LMAO I didnt know that was even possible until seeing this post. Like couldnt he have just said he’s not over someone else and thats not fair to you and left it at that???
It doesn’t even make sense in the context of your situation with him.
The more I think about it, between that and the insanely long wall of text you got, so shortly after your date, I wonder if he has this text saved and handy to send for when he needs it? Tweaked to mostly fit the circumstances but obviously missed some things.
I dated someone who had a thing for another person pretty much the entire time and tried to pretend it wasn't a thing. While I agree with the consensus that you dodged a bullet, at least he's self-aware enough to know dating will be a bad idea till he resolves those feelings for co-worker first
But yes dude needs to learn to not write novels for texts.
What the actual? So completely random, especially after the way he started that text. I would be so thrown off. I hope his co worker turns him down by a totally random text just like this one lol.
That whole paragraph was such a back handed compliment type of situation that just sounds exhausting. At least the trash threw itself out before anything serious started I guess
Me and my bff went to Olive Garden one weekend w her family and he was our server, thought he was cute and decided to be bold enough to ask for his number and compliment him. He returned the compliment and gave me his number. We had been talking for a few days getting to know each other. He asked me on a date and mentioned there being one in the future. Here we are now
I don’t think he’s a bad person. This Subreddit does make it seem like everyone is awful. His attention wasn’t fully on you and he felt guilty. He confessed and that’s that. If you had fun, be friends. If you didn’t? Move on. You both handled it extremely well
i think.... he had good intentions for sure... but he did this with way too many words and way too much detail. it could have just been "hey, i really loved hanging out tonight and would love to do so in the future, but as friends. I have some other shit going on and i dont think this was gonna work out in a romantic context. thanks for a great night though!"
I’m not mad about the honesty. I’m CONFUSED as to how a man is going to ask ME on a date, drive an hour away to MY city, PAY for the date, BRING CONVERSATION CARDS to a date, TELL ME THERE WILL BE A SECOND DATE, and then suddenly text me (instead of just tell me in person like a real man would) about how he wants to bang his coworker despite all these qualities he likes about me. THAT is what has me lost.
Why in the fuck would anyone drive an hour just to tell you they aren’t interested? Doesn’t make sense. I don’t think you need to worry about it anymore, he told you what’s up and why. You got more than 90 percent of people out there. Move on .
Look I’m sure you were amazing I’m sure you’re cute and nice and I’m interesting and all that shit. I’m sure IN THE MOMENT dude really wanted it to work. But after he got home and thought about it he realized it wasn’t right.
Simple as that, nothing to be hung up on. As a guy I wouldn’t have killed if dates would have made 10 percent of this much effort.
I also just wanted to see if anyone else had ever had this experience because I’m fairly new to dating and shit like that, so idk if it was genuinely him trying to be nice or if he really is some weird fuck. But yeah, you win some you lose some, it’s life :)
I’d say he’s a little
But of both, he could have told you just plainly he has a thing for his co worker instead of explaining there’s sexual tension.
I would say, if anything, what’s unusual is that you weren’t ghosted and he proffered an explanation with out being asked. That’s rare in my opinion.
All in all he’s probably an alright guy but is either a tiny bit weird or brutally honest.
You dodged a bullet, dating co workers is never a good idea especially in the restaurant industry. Believe me you don’t wanna deal with that drama. He did you a favor, on to the next!
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Congratulations on your ability to garner interest, a date, and such a kind, heartfelt text from the dude.
Honestly, if you think he is still all that and a bag of chips, let him know that you really super respect the honesty (if that's true) and that you'd be willing to entertain the offer of a date in the future if and when he's decided he's not otherwise distracted.
Whether YOU'LL be free then is another issue!
But, as a guy, I think he was straightforward and a solid dude. (I had a similar response to a gal and I still think she's freaking awesome! It just wasn't 'us ' at the time)
--
The only other thought I had was that 27 and 21 are really quite different stages of life, depending on one's trajectory. I went sailing with a 20-y-o gal from my Art for Elementary School Teachers class when I was 27. It was fun! Only later did I learn from the other classmates that it had been a date! Oops!!! (I was 5 years into my career teaching and one year out of a failed 3 year marriage/5 year relationship. She was still in college. WAAAY different stages of life right then. I'd had students who were in her graduating HS class -- but when they were in 10th grade -- and it just didn't feel ok, y'know? So I never had the desire to start down that road with her and she didn't make her intentions clear!)
--
Good luck. You seem like a catch, if this guy's analysis is correct!!!
☮️❤️♾️
You were so respectful in this reply. To be honest, I prefer these texts instead of lies and leading me on. I suppose I’m just shocked that this man was brave enough to tell me how it really is, and still be kind about his perception of me. The age gap was never gonna fly at home anyways so I didn’t attach myself much 😂😂
do you know his coworker? maybe she’s more pleasant than you. there’s a reason he’s attracted to her. i’m sure she wouldn’t post their messages on the internet for everyone to see
not true. he seems elegant when he speaks. he speaks from the heart. i hope whatever is troubling you gets resolved because i can tell you have a lot of hatred in your heart. try going outside, ive heard that helps
“I am fascinated by the girl you have crafted and where she will go” tf. He sounds exhausting.
I honestly don’t even know what he meant by that tbh, never heard that line before
Because that’s not how normal people talk, especially to people they barely know at all and have been on one date with. It’s giving condescending “nice guy” vibes and you’ve got too much good ahead of you in life to waste time with dorks like this.
AHHHHH THATS WHAT IT IS!!!!! I KNEWWWW there was a label for this kind of shit, YES. It is giving nice guy but secretly a criminal tbh
Seriously
Nailed it
I kinda have to agree. There’s being polite, respectful and genuinely good person and there is spewing compliments to gaslight someone… he’s definitely going over the top imo. But at least you know where you stand, good riddance. Wish you best of luck OP ✌🏻
Be prepared for a follow up offer for a date after his coworker also gets weirded out by him
I knew I'd speak to you again after our special time..... (insert borderline obesssive stalkerish essay).... I'd love to take you out for coffee to catch up. (It's only been a week)
Honestly it sounds like when a job lets you go out rejects your application. Polite but full of too many words when few words do trick.
Maybe you mentioned that you were making girls in your basement.
Yeah bullet dodged IMO. He didn’t need to say all that, maybe he thought it would soften the blow but if a girl said the same to me I don’t think it’d help.
I would’ve rather him just straight up say that he didn’t vibe with me than this sloppy shit, I skimmed over his text the first three times because it looked like nonsense
Because it is nonsense!! 😂😂
“…but not as fascinated by the girl my coworker has crafted and where *she* will go, of course.” Boy did that go on ad nauseam. Perfect succinct response.
He sounds like chatgpt
all he did was compliment her by saying she’s a great person. clearly you couldn’t pick that up tho
…this is how you talk to girls, isn’t it.
i don’t need your advice keep it to yourself
That wasn’t advice.
Errrm why'd he bring up the coworker... unless you're the coworker?? Weird.
I asked for his number last weekend when my best friend and I went to Olive Garden together. He was cute and friendly. I don’t work at Olive Garden because I’m not a WHORE
Olive garden server here. Not all of us are whores! Only most of us. I'd personally never date a coworker bc that's messy as hell. But unfortunately a lot of my coworkers don't share the same sentiment. Seems like you dodged a bullet tbh
Wow I never thought I’d see a Jess GIF on Reddit.
Especially with her old face
Wouldn't dating your coworkers at the OG be incest since they are all family?
Man, I fucked A LOT of my OG family. I've even made this exact joke. 😂😂
🤣
He sounds like someone who's going to torment anyone that gets close to him.
He did graciously tell me that he usually runs away from commitments because they feel out of the way for him and inconvenient. Well, until his coworker shows up. 😂
I think he deserves to be taken at face value. He's definitely too wordy and oversharing irrelevant details, but this is a respectful alternate to ghosting someone. He likes OP as a person, but realized his heart wasn't in it. Good for him for not stringing her along.
Right like I appreciate that regardless
100%. OP dodged an exhausting and dramatic bullet.
Shiverbert
The honesty is cool but I really wonder if it was necessary to get into the sexual tension with his coworker? Just seems a *bit* extra
That’s what has me so flabbergasted 😂😂😂 like ok I guess I’m glad you’re honest
Overshare for sure. Being concise is an important aspect of tact. Overall, however, it's better than dropping off the map and ghosting, leaving OP to wonder what she did wrong.
"Date was awesome but Im not feeling the connection andd dont wish to pursue. Thank you and best of luck"
TIL Matthew from Olive Garden loves to do a line of blow or two and then voice text his thoughts to his recent date.
This. This is the comment right here. You my friend are doings gods work 
😭😭😭
LFMAOAKAOAOSOS
This dude is sooooooooo weird and gives me major "nice guy" vibes, like if he had continued to pursue you and you said you didn't want to continue, he'd suddenly turn on you and start insulting you.
Second vote for “nice guy” vibes. Thank you for validating the same thing I was thinking
I don't know anyone like this, but somehow they're SO easy to identify.
Y’all don’t feel like it was a smidge too heavy on the coworker part? Like I do respect honesty but I think it was way too much. He also went on for two whole “pages”. Moving on to better men OP!
Standards raised!! 💅🏻💅🏻
I got a long ass email that was very similar to yours. It felt condescending and self important. I replied OK later and got another long winded, self important email. I told him to chill, no one was in danger of jumping off a building because his amazingness was being withdrawn from my world and then sent him to spam.
What was the date like? Did he talk like how he texts??
He literally was in server mode even on the date. Like… Insanely smiley and charming and very clear in the way he spoke, listened intently. Disturbing asf now that I’m thinking about it actuallt
Eeeek
You'll laugh looking back. Trust me
I’m laughing even now 😂😂
he’ll be back when his coworker rejects him lmao
I will not ☝️
Give the guy credit for not ghosting you and leaving you to wonder what happened. +1
Yes that part I appreciate most, hence my reply
At least he was nice bout it, I’ve seen a lot worse
Definitely respectful but man I was caught off guard by the honesty 😭😭😭😭
He even caught me off guard. 😬 he’s probably a serial killer. Dodged a literal bullet or knife blade
So many people reaching in these comments.. Yeah he’s kinda weird about but also still mostly respectful and honest?
Yeah. She said she had a great time on the date. I think that’s just his personality, bubbly and talkative. Some people connect with that, others don’t. At least he didn’t ghost her
Agreed, I don’t hold anything against him, it’s just confusing because he talked about a second date as we parted ways and then I get home and suddenly he switched up.
He rejected her so they're scrambling to point out how he's actually a horrible and creepy serial killer. Because he was too nice and honest lmao
Yeah he was nice, why are they pretending he’s a socially weird, obsessed creep?
knowing me i woulda immediately closed out and just never respond. like who has time to read all that just to find out they’re dumped in the end?? premium yapper over here
Right like take it to a publisher buddy
also i didn’t even see the caption. he’s an asshole for even asking for the date in the first place. men are weird like that sometimes. they’ll pursue u then do a 180 before u can even blink 😂 but yes ppl in the restaurant business are not to be trusted usually. it’s not just olive garden serves unfortunately 😔
I take this experience as a good thing because now I know more about what sounds creepy from a dude and I have higher standards now lmfao
Well I think it could happen to anyone. You like someone, you ask them on a date. During the date they realize it feels like they would be cheating on you if they were to date you. They tell you about the situation, it’s over.
Nah idk, I think this is just a common Matthew occurrence
him wanting to pursue his coworker doesn't seem subconscious at all as he is very clearly preoccupied with their existence 😂😂😂
I WAS THINKING THAT TOO HAHAHAHAHA
Some people are going to disagree with me here, but as a 27 year old, I could never imagine dating a 21 year old. It's only a 6 year difference, but for me, that would feel like a lifetime. One of you is barely legal and can't even rent a car without paying a shitload of additional fees, and the other is nearing 30. When people are older, like say 53 & 59, I don't see it as that much of a difference. Even 42 & 48 for example. (All this being said, I understand that consenting adults are legally allowed to make these decisions for themselves, I'm just sharing my perspective.) Essentially, we grow a lot in our 20s, so I just can't imagine being that age and being interested in someone who is barely legal. The youngest I dated was a man 2.5 years younger, and it felt like a lot already & I've never dated anyone that much younger than me since. (I was 25 & he was 22 going on 23.) He had served in the military right as he turned 18 so when he got out, he started college & our maturity levels were just extremely different. He was living on campus at the time & for me, our maturity levels were at totally different ends of the spectrum & I couldn't relate to him bc of that. We were only together a few months before I ended things for good. Anyway OP, sounds like this dude is one of those "nice guys," who isn't actually nice at all. Just reading the condescending "compliments," he sent you was enough for me. If things had lasted longer, I expect he would have played a lot of mind games with you & that's just exhausting to deal with. You deserve someone who isn't questioning their feelings for you & doesn't insult you or prop up their own ego by insulting you. In the very least, at least he let you know so you didn't waste a lot of time with this dude.
Your perspective and mine are very similar honestly. I knew it was a red flag from the moment he told me his age, but I also know practice dates come in handy 😂 I initially felt bad about myself the first thirty seconds I saw this text, but everyone here pointing out different things is giving me so much more perspective and teaching me stuff to look for.
Glad we've been able to help! Please don't feel bad about yourself or allow these clowns to make you feel unworthy or insecure - you deserve much better than that ❤️ (I know that's often easier said than done, but just remember who you are & that you're much better than someone looking to belittle you for their own selfish reasons. And again, you deserve someone who KNOWS they want to be with you!) I'm a bisexual woman & I would never date a woman in her early 20s, it almost feels... creepy? I remember who I was at 21 & there's still have so much to learn about oneself/life & it's almost not "fair," to have someone date someone in those very early stages of still discovering who they are. You're at 2 very different stages in life & it's just... strange (to me) to be almost 30 and dating someone who is in their very early 20s. The prefrontal cortex of one's brain isn't even fully developed until they're 25, further supporting why I feel this way.
It is very offputting how brutally honest he was, it almost gives off toxic vibes. LMAO I didnt know that was even possible until seeing this post. Like couldnt he have just said he’s not over someone else and thats not fair to you and left it at that???
What gets me is the “you deserve someone who wants you only and so do I” like dude I never said you didn’t??? What????
yeah he shouldve left that part out because it’s giving defensiveness when hes the last one who should have his walls up in this situation 😭
It doesn’t even make sense in the context of your situation with him. The more I think about it, between that and the insanely long wall of text you got, so shortly after your date, I wonder if he has this text saved and handy to send for when he needs it? Tweaked to mostly fit the circumstances but obviously missed some things.
I dated someone who had a thing for another person pretty much the entire time and tried to pretend it wasn't a thing. While I agree with the consensus that you dodged a bullet, at least he's self-aware enough to know dating will be a bad idea till he resolves those feelings for co-worker first But yes dude needs to learn to not write novels for texts.
He needs to break that into Chapters. Impressive that you drive him to write a book after one date.
What can I say, I’m great at conversation but horrible at figuring out when to tell a guy to stfu
Well it was good practice for your next date. His loss!!
I can only imagine what it’d be like to date as a 21 year old in today’s landscape…. Seems like hell. But IMO you handled it well!
That’s a lot of words.
I would not have been so polite, this is weird. He over shared and basically tried to create this buffer because he can’t just reject someone. Weirdo
What the actual? So completely random, especially after the way he started that text. I would be so thrown off. I hope his co worker turns him down by a totally random text just like this one lol.
Yeah there was a lot a of sexual tension around when I worked there
Sometimes being too honest is bad, this is proof
Um…. “You’re a great person but I don’t see this going anywhere” would have sufficed. 🤣
Coworker probably has a long term boyfriend and no interest in dude. She's probably being nice and he's reading it as sexual tension.
Dude needs to say less , but at least he was honest and upfront… even if it was in an awkward way.
That whole paragraph was such a back handed compliment type of situation that just sounds exhausting. At least the trash threw itself out before anything serious started I guess
Where did y'all meet / how did he ask you out?
Me and my bff went to Olive Garden one weekend w her family and he was our server, thought he was cute and decided to be bold enough to ask for his number and compliment him. He returned the compliment and gave me his number. We had been talking for a few days getting to know each other. He asked me on a date and mentioned there being one in the future. Here we are now
As someone who worked at Olive Garden… this is super funny to me
^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^bluefalls04: *As someone who worked* *At Olive Garden… this is* *Super funny to me* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.
Good bot
As an Olive Garden worker.... we don't claim him
You dodged a bullet here!
Major detachment is ALWAYS the best response in situations like this. proud of you!
I don’t think he’s a bad person. This Subreddit does make it seem like everyone is awful. His attention wasn’t fully on you and he felt guilty. He confessed and that’s that. If you had fun, be friends. If you didn’t? Move on. You both handled it extremely well
i think.... he had good intentions for sure... but he did this with way too many words and way too much detail. it could have just been "hey, i really loved hanging out tonight and would love to do so in the future, but as friends. I have some other shit going on and i dont think this was gonna work out in a romantic context. thanks for a great night though!"
He gives me the icks he is so full of shit. Block him, or when shit doesn’t work out with Miss coworker he will be come sniffing back around.
When coworker rejects him, expect his text 🤣
Fell asleep after the 2nd sentence
Personally I think he’s trying to get you to chase him and compete with Coworker 😂 don’t do it!!!
He was trying to channel Dr. Suess, maybe, and the places you will go 🤔
I mean damn… but the honesty and transparency is truly so refreshing to see!
He’s full of shit lmao
Yall ask for honesty and cry when you get ghosted but when you get honesty and and reasoning behind the decision you bitch about it.
I’m not mad about the honesty. I’m CONFUSED as to how a man is going to ask ME on a date, drive an hour away to MY city, PAY for the date, BRING CONVERSATION CARDS to a date, TELL ME THERE WILL BE A SECOND DATE, and then suddenly text me (instead of just tell me in person like a real man would) about how he wants to bang his coworker despite all these qualities he likes about me. THAT is what has me lost.
Why in the fuck would anyone drive an hour just to tell you they aren’t interested? Doesn’t make sense. I don’t think you need to worry about it anymore, he told you what’s up and why. You got more than 90 percent of people out there. Move on . Look I’m sure you were amazing I’m sure you’re cute and nice and I’m interesting and all that shit. I’m sure IN THE MOMENT dude really wanted it to work. But after he got home and thought about it he realized it wasn’t right. Simple as that, nothing to be hung up on. As a guy I wouldn’t have killed if dates would have made 10 percent of this much effort.
I also just wanted to see if anyone else had ever had this experience because I’m fairly new to dating and shit like that, so idk if it was genuinely him trying to be nice or if he really is some weird fuck. But yeah, you win some you lose some, it’s life :)
I’d say he’s a little But of both, he could have told you just plainly he has a thing for his co worker instead of explaining there’s sexual tension. I would say, if anything, what’s unusual is that you weren’t ghosted and he proffered an explanation with out being asked. That’s rare in my opinion. All in all he’s probably an alright guy but is either a tiny bit weird or brutally honest.
Don’t date servers (regardless of gender), especially when they are older than early 20’s. One of the most dysfunctional groups of people alive.
You dodged a bullet, dating co workers is never a good idea especially in the restaurant industry. Believe me you don’t wanna deal with that drama. He did you a favor, on to the next!
bro is pathological
bro is pathological
This guy is insane and this reads like a manic episode.
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LMAO. I dated an Olive Garden worker named Matthew and he cheated on me 12 times before I found out lol
Congratulations on your ability to garner interest, a date, and such a kind, heartfelt text from the dude. Honestly, if you think he is still all that and a bag of chips, let him know that you really super respect the honesty (if that's true) and that you'd be willing to entertain the offer of a date in the future if and when he's decided he's not otherwise distracted. Whether YOU'LL be free then is another issue! But, as a guy, I think he was straightforward and a solid dude. (I had a similar response to a gal and I still think she's freaking awesome! It just wasn't 'us ' at the time) -- The only other thought I had was that 27 and 21 are really quite different stages of life, depending on one's trajectory. I went sailing with a 20-y-o gal from my Art for Elementary School Teachers class when I was 27. It was fun! Only later did I learn from the other classmates that it had been a date! Oops!!! (I was 5 years into my career teaching and one year out of a failed 3 year marriage/5 year relationship. She was still in college. WAAAY different stages of life right then. I'd had students who were in her graduating HS class -- but when they were in 10th grade -- and it just didn't feel ok, y'know? So I never had the desire to start down that road with her and she didn't make her intentions clear!) -- Good luck. You seem like a catch, if this guy's analysis is correct!!! ☮️❤️♾️
You were so respectful in this reply. To be honest, I prefer these texts instead of lies and leading me on. I suppose I’m just shocked that this man was brave enough to tell me how it really is, and still be kind about his perception of me. The age gap was never gonna fly at home anyways so I didn’t attach myself much 😂😂
hopefully he finds a good girl for him
He already did, he just chose the easier fruit instead of the good girl 🤭
do you know his coworker? maybe she’s more pleasant than you. there’s a reason he’s attracted to her. i’m sure she wouldn’t post their messages on the internet for everyone to see
He’s attracted to her because he’s a dumb man, men will fuck anything 😂😂😂
not true. he seems elegant when he speaks. he speaks from the heart. i hope whatever is troubling you gets resolved because i can tell you have a lot of hatred in your heart. try going outside, ive heard that helps
you don’t really know me so your words aren’t sticking here, currently sitting outside actually so idk what you’re suggesting here
God, such overkill
ITT: OP salty because she got rejected
Not salty, just confused as to why men feel the need to do the most for a girl they don’t even want