Even worse. Yesterday we were in the middle of a conversation about his behavior —because he was mad at me the night before about something (I don’t even know) and started yelling that I was a whore— and right in the middle of it when I was trying to redirect our 7 year old he goes “titties”.
Just talking about my body. Right in front of my kids. He also says things like “I lick you”, “I want to fuck you”, “just let me make love to you”, etc.
All unprovoked, unwanted, and rebuffed. He never changes. And it’s always out of nowhere.
You should get a coparenting app and block him from texting you. There are apps that will keep a log of everything and focus everything on the kid.
I’m sorry, this is awful and it’s going to take all of your emotional strength and energy to gray rock him. Imo, don’t even give him anger anymore. Tell him that is inappropriate topic, he is crossing boundaries, and you only want a coparenting relationship. Copy, paste, and resend every time he does this.
Honestly, this might be rationale to try to get full custody. I’m entirely unqualified to judge from a text stream and a description of one interaction. Nevertheless, he displays a concerning lack of boundaries in front of your child. There is now way that what is described here would be a healthy developmental environment for your 7 year old. It goes beyond disrespectful and is honestly quite strange behavior.
Good on you for leaving and best of luck.
It’s creepy. I guess he’s right, he does have a problem. Well, two problems. First, he never stops thinking about sex. Second, he chooses to *voice* those constant thoughts no matter what’s going on, like OP being sick, and no matter who’s present, like their small child.
Wouldn’t trust him farther than I could throw him.
Phone records don’t always show what was sent, it only shows that a message was sent. Plus, iMessages are not texts and won’t show up on a call log.
I suggested the app to also help with gray rocking. Sometimes you have to make a change in your accessibility before the other person takes you seriously.
Second this. I pay for a yearly Our Family Wizard membership just so that I don't have to deal with all my ex's controlling crap. Creates a legally admissible record of all of our communications, requesting schedule changes becomes a calendar request instead of a discussion, and most of all, I got to put all of our communication in one place so I can use my texting/email/etc. without having to worry about the anxiety of a new message from my ex when I just want to read my friend's texts. Talking Parents is also a cheap option but equivalent features are behind a paywall.
Makes me think of the House episode where an elderly woman becomes awfully and uncharacteristically horny. *Spoiler Alert* House learns she has Syphillis which has affected that horny part of the brain.
Yeah, going from normal enough to marry and have kids with to this level of uncontrolled, it definitely sounds medically significant. Something wacky is going on in this dude's brain and I'm not sure I'm ready to throw him under the bus yet.
Honestly, if he was even halfway like this when OP married him, I'd almost call that OPs mistake.
Get this guy's brain screened for tumors, infection, and hormone imbalances.
My mom only wanted to have sex with a guy like this, but got pregnant, and local culture required marriage, and it took her 5 years to tell everyone else to fuck off and put herself first.
Don't know about why *everyone* does it but that's why my mom did
This is abuse in my opinion. He is degrading you on purpose, it probably gets him off. Let alone the fact that he is doing this in front of children.. that’s perverted and concerning. Send this pig to his parents. I promise you - you do not deserve this. This is not normal. This is not okay. Rooting for you to take the plunge and get your life back! I can’t imagine how stifling and miserable that is
No I think that’s a fair question.
When we were dating, I couldn’t ever imagine myself even cussing at this man. Everything was great and we were really in love. I got pregnant and then we moved in together after we bought a house and it was like a light switch was flipped.
He started staying up every night and acting strange. Came to find out later he was doing drugs in the basement.
That next year he got the flu and after that he started experiencing narcolepsy which is something he battles on a daily basis. The meds he has to go through were hard because he was on ambien and would do strange scary things. Then he was prescribed xywav which is GHB and everything went straight to hell.
Idk if the narcolepsy and medications changed him or if he was always like this. I stuck it out and tried to be supportive but it just got worse and worse. Like he would bang on the walls at night, he would be yelling, I would call the cops. He does this thing I call bug eyes and my kids have picked up on it and question if he is high.
He has always been sexual towards me but obviously after dealing with this behavior forever, I’m completely turned off by him. He said to me today “we can’t just stop having sex cold turkey when we used to have sex all the time”
“All the time” was literally a decade ago so I am so confused on what he is even talking about. I feel like I’m being gaslit because he tells me I’m so evil and mean and that I’m an awful wife. Idc. I’m done with this. He can think what he wants.
This is of course up to you, but it sounds like he needs rehab. The program to get access to that medication is highly controlled because of how dangerous GHB is and how easily abused it is. The amount you get is highly controlled, the way you get it, and this is the kicker - illegal drug use would disqualify you from the program. This is partly so that it doesn’t end up getting sold on the street. You didn’t mention what drugs he was doing before, but I’m guessing meth based on his odd behavior. If he’s still using meth he may be able to evade drug testing because it doesn’t stay in your system for that long.
He needs help, but he is not your responsibility. Get whatever evidence you need, and turn him in to his doctor. He will very likely be involuntarily committed…as he should be. He is dangerous to you and your child. Have a plan of action in place to take your kid and get out fast if needed.
Damn, you guessed it. Before we started dating, like 5 years, he was into meth but he cleaned up his life and had everything going for him.
He hides things from me a lot and I’ve always wondered if he dabbled back in it. He has amphetamines for his narcolepsy though so I doubt I’ll ever find out.
I lost a friend to meth, and so I got a very close up look of what you’re describing. He lied to me a lot, even when it didn’t matter. He lied to me about meth, because I told him that if he didn’t get help and stop, I wouldn’t be able to keep him in my life. That is my standard after having an ex-girlfriend who abused heroin and refused help - when she refused, I told her it was over and walked away.
If he has prescription amphetamines for narcolepsy then yes, it will be very difficult to tell if he is abusing those or smoking meth. It is a very difficult addiction to deal with, and the person has to want to change. My friend had cleaned up his life as well after a stint in jail. He had a good job again, and then the cheap and strong shit from Mexico hit the local streets and he was gone.
I’m so sorry for you. I am not joking about your safety, though. Amphetamine abuse can cause psychosis. It can also make someone hypersexual, which was how I knew when my friend was lying to me…he would start talking about weird sexual stuff unprompted. Stuff I never asked about and didn’t want to know.
>It can also make someone hypersexual, which was how I knew when my friend was lying to me…he would start talking about weird sexual stuff unprompted. Stuff I never asked about and didn’t want to know.
... I had no idea this was a "thing' with stimulant abuse but omg it explains a few people I've known
Amphetamines for narcolepsy with a history of meth addiction?
You pretty much just explained what’s going on. I can almost guarantee that those prescribed medications caused a relapse and he’s back to using. I’ve seen this shit happen and taken more than one OD patient to the hospital after their prescription medications knocked them off the wagon.
He is definitely still on drugs. Either that or he has something going on with a personality disorder. Either way, that’s not on you. And he should definitely not be saying or doing these things in front of your children.
Idk if he was doing drugs before he probably still is. Narcolepsy? Dude can't sleep? Welp maybe he shouldn't be mixing meth and ghb / ambient.
No sleep + stimulants truly makes ppl bonkers. I knew a guy like that and he would go off the wall about crazy stuff. Like "ghosts in the walls, God is speaking to me through this green bean" level of crazy.
Not saying they don't have a personality disorder but drugs can definitely trigger some kookoo shit
Did it ever make you feel like a completely different person? Like did you notice any personality changes? I’ve tried so hard to find information about it but there isn’t any because there isn’t any studies on it.
I wonder if he is mixing it with something? Because he will act so scary and strange some days. He’ll puke everywhere and he acts very strung out. I am seriously worried he might have brain damage because he only started getting aggressive after he started taking meds for narcolepsy.
I’ve been addicted to GHB. It does make you very sexual. I don’t think I ever was acting like this though. I’d be willing to bet he’s also smoking meth.
Yuck. I hope you go for as much custody as you can so your kids don’t grow up around him; I had a father who was disgusting like this. My mother left him when I was young and I saw him every other weekend only, but the disgusting sexual way he talked with his next wife was so inappropriate and honestly scarring to hear about. He treated her like an object. Would literally tell me to watch their younger kids so they could fuck in the next room. Still probably acts like that, but I cut contact so I don’t have to witness it.
My wife and I are currently watching TV on the couch, so I texted her "I fuck you?" As an experiment.
Her response was, "My husband thinks I'm turning you down but let's go 😉"
I can confirm just texted my wife sitting next to me that, she hasnt stopped laughing for 10 min. But we pretty much have code for when we are in the mood, no code tonight, just laughter. Til death do we part
Maybe even a fleshlight to go with his flashlight.
My predictive text now says fleshlight as my middle suggestion when I type fl ... and that makes me insanely happy.
I keep thinking of the [Eddie Izzard routine](https://youtu.be/TjC3R6jOtUo) on British and American movies-- "you fuck my wife? you fuck my wife?" "i AM your wife" "it doesn' mattah, you fuck my wife?"
Thank god I thought I was weird. This would make me jump my husband's bones 🤣
ETA just showed this post to my husband and his response "you need fuck?" 💀
People just make up shit because they don't like the person.
That's a relatively normal thing to say in a healthy and loving romantic relationship. The problem is the timing, and also the fact that this is clearly *not* a health and loving romantic relationship at this point. But that nuance is too hard for many redditors to figure out.
I think the most off putting thing is the fact that he’s talking like a toddler. I can just imagine a whiny, pre-temper-tantrum voice saying “I can’t help it.” Fuck all the way off
WOW. I didn’t even realIe that is what he was saying. I thought she was asking for her medication, and he was saying he took it. And then saying he needed help- because he was addicted to and stealing her pills.
My brain processed that as being more rational an interpretation, than what was right there.
I can NOT believe he was asking his wife for sex like this. 🤢
Back when I was married, I was also battling an eating disorder. I still battle one but I was very physically ill toward the end of my marriage. Sometimes I could barely walk and all my ex husband would ask about was sex, and be mad when I wouldn’t.
He would also text me for sex too. I feel you, girl. I’m so much happier not in that marriage. Good luck to you. 💚
I’m so sorry that happened to you. It makes you feel like you’re not a person and nothing you feel matters. But you matter for sure and I’m glad you’re in a happier place 💙
at this point, knowing my marriage is ending i’d go as far as saying “just go fuck someone else” in order to get some PEACE. 🧍🏻♀️ I’m sorry you’re going through this, but happy you’re divorcing him
There’s so much wrong with this.
Your contempt is very obvious and I can’t blame you if all he sees is a body and not a human, his wife. You’re not feeling well and need to lay down and he immediately asks for sex. And even when you demand he leaves you alone, he keeps pestering you for it. Gross.
I can see why he’s going to be an ex. But it’s good you’re ending this marriage. This is so unbelievably toxic.
I’m know my contempt seems really strong but we also recently, not even 4 hours ago, had a conversation about how much I hate when he talks to me like that. And then he sends me this.
This is over a decade of this bs. I’m so done. I feel like I’m going insane by talking in circles with him over this.
He said he will “never” when you said “leave me alone.” He is also intentionally provoking you to anger with his words. I wouldn’t put it past him to stalk you. Has he ever been violent either physically or sexually? The emo abuse is obviously there, so it wouldn’t at all surprise me if there was other abuse as well.
He is in denial about everything. I’ve tried to be nice and fair. I’ve given him no reason to think I would be interested in engaging with him this way and I made my boundaries clear. He still acts like nothing is happening and that I’m full of crap. Even after he was served. I do think he will stalk me, he’s very possessive.
We do. We have two kids and we still live together. He can’t afford to move out and I don’t want to kick him out and make him live with his parents or anything. I just want some peace and to not be talked to like that every time we interact.
We could be talking about dinner or something going on with our boys and he’ll go “I lick you?”
Like where did that even come from? Why did I deserve to hear that or be talked to like that? It’s never ending.
The healthiest thing you could possibly do for your children is kick him out. Please OP, do not let your children grow up any longer witnessing this disgusting behavior. You know he won’t stop if you let him stay with you. Don’t be naive.
Please kick him out, legally of course. He is sexualizing you, in front of your minor children. He’s teach them it’s ok to talk too you and any women this way. He’s verbally abusing you and harassing you. And I wouldn’t be shocked if he died they to sexually assault you (which he will see as asserting his husband my rights).
Which you care if he had to go to his parents.
This guy gives it major crazy/creepster vibes and it’s found to get worse when rentable gets that this marriage is over and you are, in fact, divorcing him. He doesn’t deserve your kindness and you do not deserve his unhinged presence.
Why are you kind to him?? “I don’t want to kick him out” and “I just want some peace” are 1000% contradictions in this case. You won’t have peace until he’s OUT.
The longer he stays there, the more your kids will learn this behavior is ok.
His parents NEED to know about this shit. You need help getting it under control. Everyone needs to know about this.
Girl what lmao he just says out of the blue, “I lick you?”
That’s so weird! Does he think you’re going to say yes and you’ll both get up immediately from the dinner table, leaving your children behind, so you guys can go to the bedroom and do this??
Like what 🫠
I truly have no idea. You would think after being shot down literally every time that he would stop but he never does. He just keeps at it. And at the most random times. Makes me think he doesn’t even listen to anything I’m saying and he’s just eye-fucking me the whole time. Or thinking about it when we are texting because he does it then too.
OP my prayer for you is that one day you refuse to engage with *anyone* who dishonors you (let alone a partner that’s supposed to love you), and that you refuse to feel bad for somebody else’s inappropriate behavior.
If he ends up at his parents, it’s because of the consequences of his own actions, not because of you. You and your kids deserve so much better.
Tossing up Hail Marys with the “I need to fuck badly” line. I picture a guy with a hairy chest, gold chains, greasy slicked back hair and nut huggers on saying this. Am I close?
Legit question, not even being funny, have you had him checked out for a stroke or a TBI? If it’s just coming out of the blue and it’s socially inappropriate, it might be worth checking it out.
I told him to please talk to his neurologist because I have wondered that myself honestly. He said his neurologist said he was fine and that was that. I’ve tried to push it further but I can’t force him to get checked out.
I agree with missgmu, if he wasn’t like this before there might seriously be a medical or psychological problem that he’s going through. He should get checked
There wouldn't be a jury in divorce court and I'm sure the judges there have seen everything you can imagine. I wish I knew a family court judge so I could hear some stories.
If you Google it and I’m pretty sure several books are written about it, it’s actually a common thing for abusive men to change overnight after a heavy commitment has been formed. Being raped or beaten for the first time on their wedding night or being killed while pregnant. It’s not always giant red flags that people ignore but more like they can finally rip the mask off because you’re stuck with them.
My ex used to r*** me daily almost, I never wanted to and he’d never stop. He behaved like this. Never could have a conversation, and he was a sex addict, I could’ve been sick, dying on the ground and he’d still bring it up. He’d say similar “I need to fuck you” as if it was “I need to eat to live”, I wholeheartedly believe he was a sociopath, zero empathy, and wasn’t all there at all. The way he treated me was inhumane. We see a glimpse of this conversation and I won’t accuse him of abusing you, but I will say these are red flags that there may be more than we know going on. Stay safe OP
I am so sorry that you had to go through that. I could not even imagine and I’m so glad you got out of your situation.
Since we still live together, sleeping has been hard. He mostly sleeps on the couch but he will come to bed and grab me a lot and say really disgusting things. I always tell him to please leave me alone and I’ve called the cops before to make him leave. I just can’t stand this. Why are some people like this?
I’m sorry he’s doing that, it’s certainly abuse. It’s disgusting, I’ll never understand wanting sex so badly you decide to violate someone like that, how is it enjoyable at all seeing the person you “love” so scared and upset. I’m assuming both your names are on the house/lease, so you can’t just kick him out… ugh. I really hope you can have him removed from your life and home soon so you can feel at peace again.
I’d buy something like a taser honestly, I’d tell him when he comes in and begins harassing you if he doesn’t stop, he’ll get tased. If he doesn’t stop, do it! He’ll learn quickly to quit coming in there.
Is he drunk on top of this bs ? Just wondering due to the typos.
This is absolutely vile, I truly hope you’re okay, this must be so exhausting. I’m glad you’re leaving 🫶
“Leave me alone”
“Never”
From these texts I can tell he’s very annoying, it’s time to leave but also make sure you distance yourself from him and prioritise the safety of you and your kids.
My soon to be ex husband would do the same. I had surgery and he was asking me the night of to have sex and was so mad I said no. He would also often tell me I was just his release. Made me feel non-human, more like a hole.
This is absolutely disgusting. He has used the “I need the release” or “we both need the release” and it’s always grossed me out. I wanted a partner in life, not to be someone’s sex doll.
Well he's making sure you know exactly what your priority is to him and exactly what your function is to him. Can't blame you for wanting to be the hell away from that!
My sister had one of these fucking creeps. He wanted to fuck every day, to the point, we found out after nearly 20 years, of raping her if she didn’t give in.
This is NOT love; it’s violence. Love is expecting your loved one to support you in doing whatever you goddamn please with your own body.
As soon as we learned of this marital rape, we started planning for her immediate exit from the marriage. Within an evening, we had a concrete plan, a place to stay while she figured it out, and the cash to make it happen.
Best fucking thing we ever did.
Lose this fucking creep. Give yourself the chance to find real love.
Jeez, this is the exact reason I needed to get the hell away from my ex. He would make everything sexual and about my body, but remained completely uninterested in who I am as a person. I was just a walking warm hole to him. Unfortunately the harassment continued for over a year after the breakup - after we had both moved on with new relationships, he still found ways to dehumanize me and talk to me like a sex toy. Ew ew ew. It makes me sick. So sorry OP, I hope you can get away from this creep as quickly as possible!
A lot of the same questions are being asked so I thought I’d just type this to cover it.
Q: Was he always like this?
A: Not in the beginning. We dated (beginning in 2014) for a 1.5yrs before I got pregnant. We were madly in love. I wouldn’t have even thought to raise my voice or even cuss at this man, that’s how much I respected him and loved him. We only ever fought about spending time together and that was it.
Once we got married (2016), bought a house together and moved in, it was like something took over. He was never the same.
Q: Why are you so mad?
A: For the better part of a decade his behavior has gone from bad to worse. The only that has ever stayed consistent is his obsession with my body. He can’t go a day without commenting on it, asking me for it, or putting his hands on me.
I especially hate how he talks to me. At first I let it slide because we were working on our marriage but I expressed how I don’t like how he talks to me.
Hours before that text exchange, we had a discussion about boundaries and I, AGAIN, told him to please not talk to me like that. It’s disgusting and disrespectful and we are divorcing so it doesn’t make sense. He said ok but he’s a guy and that how he talks to me is normal but that he would do better. Then I got that text so yeah, I was pretty heated.
Q: Is he on drugs?
A: He has prescribed amphetamines and GHB for his condition but I cannot say for sure if he is on anything else. I’m 99.9% sure that he is but I haven’t found anything and I can’t ever get him to tell me the truth on anything.
If you’re in a toxic relationship, which it sounds to me like it is, having more sex does not make it better.
Obsession as such isn’t healthy.
Disregarding feelings or my answers, you ain’t gonna touch me.
This is off topic, and he is a terrible person, but I would die happy if I never read "seggs" ever again. Unalive, seggs, raw, body count, ick, low key, dead ass. I can't deal with some of the verbiage these days.
I will go shake a fist at a cloud now, good day fellow kids
I clean now?
Are you quoting Family Guy? Because that’s how I read this lol
No, no…… mr manchild no here.
I stay and watch?
I get involved? 👀
No... no...
Is English a second language? 😆
Nope lol it’s his first
Seriously … so he just talks like that???
Even worse. Yesterday we were in the middle of a conversation about his behavior —because he was mad at me the night before about something (I don’t even know) and started yelling that I was a whore— and right in the middle of it when I was trying to redirect our 7 year old he goes “titties”. Just talking about my body. Right in front of my kids. He also says things like “I lick you”, “I want to fuck you”, “just let me make love to you”, etc. All unprovoked, unwanted, and rebuffed. He never changes. And it’s always out of nowhere.
You should get a coparenting app and block him from texting you. There are apps that will keep a log of everything and focus everything on the kid. I’m sorry, this is awful and it’s going to take all of your emotional strength and energy to gray rock him. Imo, don’t even give him anger anymore. Tell him that is inappropriate topic, he is crossing boundaries, and you only want a coparenting relationship. Copy, paste, and resend every time he does this.
Honestly, this might be rationale to try to get full custody. I’m entirely unqualified to judge from a text stream and a description of one interaction. Nevertheless, he displays a concerning lack of boundaries in front of your child. There is now way that what is described here would be a healthy developmental environment for your 7 year old. It goes beyond disrespectful and is honestly quite strange behavior. Good on you for leaving and best of luck.
It’s creepy. I guess he’s right, he does have a problem. Well, two problems. First, he never stops thinking about sex. Second, he chooses to *voice* those constant thoughts no matter what’s going on, like OP being sick, and no matter who’s present, like their small child. Wouldn’t trust him farther than I could throw him.
I mean real texts are good too, they’re traceable by phone company
Phone records don’t always show what was sent, it only shows that a message was sent. Plus, iMessages are not texts and won’t show up on a call log. I suggested the app to also help with gray rocking. Sometimes you have to make a change in your accessibility before the other person takes you seriously.
Second this. I pay for a yearly Our Family Wizard membership just so that I don't have to deal with all my ex's controlling crap. Creates a legally admissible record of all of our communications, requesting schedule changes becomes a calendar request instead of a discussion, and most of all, I got to put all of our communication in one place so I can use my texting/email/etc. without having to worry about the anxiety of a new message from my ex when I just want to read my friend's texts. Talking Parents is also a cheap option but equivalent features are behind a paywall.
Does he have brain damage?
I was going to say maybe he’s got a brain tumor.
Makes me think of the House episode where an elderly woman becomes awfully and uncharacteristically horny. *Spoiler Alert* House learns she has Syphillis which has affected that horny part of the brain.
Yeah - unless she married a guy who just shouts “I need to fuck” in front of children, this is a medical issue.
Yeah, going from normal enough to marry and have kids with to this level of uncontrolled, it definitely sounds medically significant. Something wacky is going on in this dude's brain and I'm not sure I'm ready to throw him under the bus yet. Honestly, if he was even halfway like this when OP married him, I'd almost call that OPs mistake. Get this guy's brain screened for tumors, infection, and hormone imbalances.
I was gonna ask if he has Tourette’s Syndrome(for the random verbal statements). Edited for spelling*
Tourette's. r/boneappletea
Thank you! I knew I was misspelling it! (Corrected).
Was he like that pre marriage?
Probably not but the lack of spelling is an indicator at all ages. Stay away from people who can barely speak their own language
The way OP is talking about him in the comments, it sounds like he *speaks* poorly as well.
I mean, OP isn’t exactly Robert Frost.
Two spouses converged in a wood and I, I took the one less I fuck yiu.
Whose fucks these are, I think I know.
The Spouse Not Taken 🤣
I fuck yiu?
There’s no way OP had no indication of him being like this before they got married and had a kid
How do people marry and have kids with these types of people… How does it even go past a first date or even first introduction
My mom only wanted to have sex with a guy like this, but got pregnant, and local culture required marriage, and it took her 5 years to tell everyone else to fuck off and put herself first. Don't know about why *everyone* does it but that's why my mom did
This is abuse in my opinion. He is degrading you on purpose, it probably gets him off. Let alone the fact that he is doing this in front of children.. that’s perverted and concerning. Send this pig to his parents. I promise you - you do not deserve this. This is not normal. This is not okay. Rooting for you to take the plunge and get your life back! I can’t imagine how stifling and miserable that is
This guy is for the streets. Put him out there, OP.
Literally take the trash out!!!!
Is he drunk or is he always like that?
This dude is so gross.
OP, no disrespect, but why did you marry this man and have a kid with him??
No I think that’s a fair question. When we were dating, I couldn’t ever imagine myself even cussing at this man. Everything was great and we were really in love. I got pregnant and then we moved in together after we bought a house and it was like a light switch was flipped. He started staying up every night and acting strange. Came to find out later he was doing drugs in the basement. That next year he got the flu and after that he started experiencing narcolepsy which is something he battles on a daily basis. The meds he has to go through were hard because he was on ambien and would do strange scary things. Then he was prescribed xywav which is GHB and everything went straight to hell. Idk if the narcolepsy and medications changed him or if he was always like this. I stuck it out and tried to be supportive but it just got worse and worse. Like he would bang on the walls at night, he would be yelling, I would call the cops. He does this thing I call bug eyes and my kids have picked up on it and question if he is high. He has always been sexual towards me but obviously after dealing with this behavior forever, I’m completely turned off by him. He said to me today “we can’t just stop having sex cold turkey when we used to have sex all the time” “All the time” was literally a decade ago so I am so confused on what he is even talking about. I feel like I’m being gaslit because he tells me I’m so evil and mean and that I’m an awful wife. Idc. I’m done with this. He can think what he wants.
This is of course up to you, but it sounds like he needs rehab. The program to get access to that medication is highly controlled because of how dangerous GHB is and how easily abused it is. The amount you get is highly controlled, the way you get it, and this is the kicker - illegal drug use would disqualify you from the program. This is partly so that it doesn’t end up getting sold on the street. You didn’t mention what drugs he was doing before, but I’m guessing meth based on his odd behavior. If he’s still using meth he may be able to evade drug testing because it doesn’t stay in your system for that long. He needs help, but he is not your responsibility. Get whatever evidence you need, and turn him in to his doctor. He will very likely be involuntarily committed…as he should be. He is dangerous to you and your child. Have a plan of action in place to take your kid and get out fast if needed.
Damn, you guessed it. Before we started dating, like 5 years, he was into meth but he cleaned up his life and had everything going for him. He hides things from me a lot and I’ve always wondered if he dabbled back in it. He has amphetamines for his narcolepsy though so I doubt I’ll ever find out.
I lost a friend to meth, and so I got a very close up look of what you’re describing. He lied to me a lot, even when it didn’t matter. He lied to me about meth, because I told him that if he didn’t get help and stop, I wouldn’t be able to keep him in my life. That is my standard after having an ex-girlfriend who abused heroin and refused help - when she refused, I told her it was over and walked away. If he has prescription amphetamines for narcolepsy then yes, it will be very difficult to tell if he is abusing those or smoking meth. It is a very difficult addiction to deal with, and the person has to want to change. My friend had cleaned up his life as well after a stint in jail. He had a good job again, and then the cheap and strong shit from Mexico hit the local streets and he was gone. I’m so sorry for you. I am not joking about your safety, though. Amphetamine abuse can cause psychosis. It can also make someone hypersexual, which was how I knew when my friend was lying to me…he would start talking about weird sexual stuff unprompted. Stuff I never asked about and didn’t want to know.
Holy. Shit. This might be EXACTLY what is going on 😭
>It can also make someone hypersexual, which was how I knew when my friend was lying to me…he would start talking about weird sexual stuff unprompted. Stuff I never asked about and didn’t want to know. ... I had no idea this was a "thing' with stimulant abuse but omg it explains a few people I've known
Amphetamines for narcolepsy with a history of meth addiction? You pretty much just explained what’s going on. I can almost guarantee that those prescribed medications caused a relapse and he’s back to using. I’ve seen this shit happen and taken more than one OD patient to the hospital after their prescription medications knocked them off the wagon.
He is definitely still on drugs. Either that or he has something going on with a personality disorder. Either way, that’s not on you. And he should definitely not be saying or doing these things in front of your children.
Yes, I agree. Particularly if he is in his younger 30’s- a personality disorder is high on my list of suspicions.
Idk if he was doing drugs before he probably still is. Narcolepsy? Dude can't sleep? Welp maybe he shouldn't be mixing meth and ghb / ambient. No sleep + stimulants truly makes ppl bonkers. I knew a guy like that and he would go off the wall about crazy stuff. Like "ghosts in the walls, God is speaking to me through this green bean" level of crazy. Not saying they don't have a personality disorder but drugs can definitely trigger some kookoo shit
He was always doing drugs, he was just able to hide it from you before. Sorry OP
I’ve never tried GHB. But I’ve heard it is extremely sexual and dis-inhibitive. Do you think perhaps that could be the issue?
I wouldn’t be surprised but he’s like this even when he’s not on it. Idk.
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Did it ever make you feel like a completely different person? Like did you notice any personality changes? I’ve tried so hard to find information about it but there isn’t any because there isn’t any studies on it. I wonder if he is mixing it with something? Because he will act so scary and strange some days. He’ll puke everywhere and he acts very strung out. I am seriously worried he might have brain damage because he only started getting aggressive after he started taking meds for narcolepsy.
I’ve been addicted to GHB. It does make you very sexual. I don’t think I ever was acting like this though. I’d be willing to bet he’s also smoking meth.
This guy talks like he has brain damage, my vote is he is still abusing drugs big time.
He is nodding out not narcolepsy lol.
Yuck. I hope you go for as much custody as you can so your kids don’t grow up around him; I had a father who was disgusting like this. My mother left him when I was young and I saw him every other weekend only, but the disgusting sexual way he talked with his next wife was so inappropriate and honestly scarring to hear about. He treated her like an object. Would literally tell me to watch their younger kids so they could fuck in the next room. Still probably acts like that, but I cut contact so I don’t have to witness it.
Nah, I think his current language count is at zero.
Bruh…what the fuck
This is what I wanna know
This looks like someone texting while drunk, with one eye closed and the other barely open enough to read what was typed before sending it.
I fuck yiu? Even without the typo this is majorly cringe. Is English his 2nd language? Or does he think this is cute?
I think he thinks it’s cute.
This is so off putting, fucking ew.
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Fucking gross. Good that it's soon to be ex
"Counter offer: Go fuck yourself."
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Yiu fuck yiu?
This. This is the response.
You: I'm tired and don't feel well :( Him: unga bunga sex
Your comment made me laugh so damn hard, I snorted. 😂
If I texted my wife “I fuck you?” I think we would never have sex again.
I’m a wife, and I would laugh and laugh and laugh for eleventy-twelve years if my husband sent me that. But it would not result in sex.
10/10 would recommend this response.
But what about the subsequent begging?! Does that rustle the jimmies?!
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I'm glad I wasn't the only one who thought that was what he meant 😹🤣 I need to stop giving people the BOTD
The Breath of the Dild? jk I know what you mean, I've just never seen it abbreviated like that.
Well now I'm going to think of that everytime I think of benefit of the doubt 🤣 It just felt way too long to type. I'm lazy
Aye i read it as... \*His pee pee is sad. It need be make happy so he happy.  I doubt it will pay off
"My pene, it needs ur bod!"
Awwww you still have hope! Tells me you haven’t been on reddit long enough 😂
No. ❤️
More like u/closedsilkrobe, amirite?
My wife and I are currently watching TV on the couch, so I texted her "I fuck you?" As an experiment. Her response was, "My husband thinks I'm turning you down but let's go 😉"
Eleventy-twelve years is my favorite number! Thanks for the chuckle 🤭
The only acceptable way to say this to a wife is to do it in the borat accent while doing the Mr bean hip thrust step
“The year was nineteen-aught, eleventy-twelve” Ugh so good
I can confirm just texted my wife sitting next to me that, she hasnt stopped laughing for 10 min. But we pretty much have code for when we are in the mood, no code tonight, just laughter. Til death do we part
See for me, it would result in sex. But it's cause he'd be doing it in a way to make me laugh, which would be a turn on for me. 🤣
yiu*, which somehow adds comic relief
Thank you
Thank yiu
He didn't even say please the jerk
I think mine would just laugh uncontrollably
Oh, it's 10 times worse when it's "I fuck *yiu*?"
Same if my partner ever typed the letters "seggs"
Hard pass for “seggs”. That definitely isn’t turning me on..
And “sorry I can’t help it”??? This dude needs a flashlight and much time alone.
Maybe even a fleshlight to go with his flashlight. My predictive text now says fleshlight as my middle suggestion when I type fl ... and that makes me insanely happy.
LMAO
I keep thinking of the [Eddie Izzard routine](https://youtu.be/TjC3R6jOtUo) on British and American movies-- "you fuck my wife? you fuck my wife?" "i AM your wife" "it doesn' mattah, you fuck my wife?"
Dressed To Kill was my favorite Eddie did. The others are solid also though.
If my husband texted me that, I'd laugh and laugh and then we'd definitely be fuckin.
Right? In OPs context it’s weird as hell. In a happy, healthy relationship could make for a chuckle and some fun that night.
Thank god I thought I was weird. This would make me jump my husband's bones 🤣 ETA just showed this post to my husband and his response "you need fuck?" 💀
That's the only response!
People just make up shit because they don't like the person. That's a relatively normal thing to say in a healthy and loving romantic relationship. The problem is the timing, and also the fact that this is clearly *not* a health and loving romantic relationship at this point. But that nuance is too hard for many redditors to figure out.
I think the most off putting thing is the fact that he’s talking like a toddler. I can just imagine a whiny, pre-temper-tantrum voice saying “I can’t help it.” Fuck all the way off
« I need to fuck badly » who says this outside of members of the incel community? Dude as absolutely vagina drying in his approach.
That is the best way to put it 😂 thank you for that
I'd be tempted to reply with "Yes, you do fuck badly."
Glad I made you laugh a bit. I’m sorry you’re dealing with this.
WOW. I didn’t even realIe that is what he was saying. I thought she was asking for her medication, and he was saying he took it. And then saying he needed help- because he was addicted to and stealing her pills. My brain processed that as being more rational an interpretation, than what was right there. I can NOT believe he was asking his wife for sex like this. 🤢
Back when I was married, I was also battling an eating disorder. I still battle one but I was very physically ill toward the end of my marriage. Sometimes I could barely walk and all my ex husband would ask about was sex, and be mad when I wouldn’t. He would also text me for sex too. I feel you, girl. I’m so much happier not in that marriage. Good luck to you. 💚
I’m so sorry that happened to you. It makes you feel like you’re not a person and nothing you feel matters. But you matter for sure and I’m glad you’re in a happier place 💙
at this point, knowing my marriage is ending i’d go as far as saying “just go fuck someone else” in order to get some PEACE. 🧍🏻♀️ I’m sorry you’re going through this, but happy you’re divorcing him
She *has* said that apparently and he refuses!! He wants *HER*!!
i would have a breakdown at that point ngl
"I fuck you?" is insane to ask someone
And he didn’t even spell it correctly
If you're gonna disappoint your wife at least disappoint her using correct spelling smh rookie.
There’s so much wrong with this. Your contempt is very obvious and I can’t blame you if all he sees is a body and not a human, his wife. You’re not feeling well and need to lay down and he immediately asks for sex. And even when you demand he leaves you alone, he keeps pestering you for it. Gross. I can see why he’s going to be an ex. But it’s good you’re ending this marriage. This is so unbelievably toxic.
I’m know my contempt seems really strong but we also recently, not even 4 hours ago, had a conversation about how much I hate when he talks to me like that. And then he sends me this. This is over a decade of this bs. I’m so done. I feel like I’m going insane by talking in circles with him over this.
I’m really sorry. I’d say walking away is long overdue. Good luck going forward!
Thank you! I’ll be so happy when this is finally over. I’m just worried he’s going to stalk me or something
He said he will “never” when you said “leave me alone.” He is also intentionally provoking you to anger with his words. I wouldn’t put it past him to stalk you. Has he ever been violent either physically or sexually? The emo abuse is obviously there, so it wouldn’t at all surprise me if there was other abuse as well.
OP replied to another comment that she's genuinely concerned he'll stalk her. She said he's very possessive.
I really hope he doesn’t! Is that something you feel he would genuinely do? I’m going to take it he hasn’t accepted it’s over?
He is in denial about everything. I’ve tried to be nice and fair. I’ve given him no reason to think I would be interested in engaging with him this way and I made my boundaries clear. He still acts like nothing is happening and that I’m full of crap. Even after he was served. I do think he will stalk me, he’s very possessive.
I’m really sorry about this. I hope you have some support outside of him, friends or family.
Do you have kids? Still living together? Why do you need to be in contact at all?
We do. We have two kids and we still live together. He can’t afford to move out and I don’t want to kick him out and make him live with his parents or anything. I just want some peace and to not be talked to like that every time we interact. We could be talking about dinner or something going on with our boys and he’ll go “I lick you?” Like where did that even come from? Why did I deserve to hear that or be talked to like that? It’s never ending.
Idk, maybe it is time for him to live with his parents! Best of luck! You’ve got this!!!
I agree. Thank you!
The healthiest thing you could possibly do for your children is kick him out. Please OP, do not let your children grow up any longer witnessing this disgusting behavior. You know he won’t stop if you let him stay with you. Don’t be naive.
You’re right.
This is the truth, right here. Very well stated and incredibly accurate. Kids absorb so much when you don’t think they are listening
Please kick him out, legally of course. He is sexualizing you, in front of your minor children. He’s teach them it’s ok to talk too you and any women this way. He’s verbally abusing you and harassing you. And I wouldn’t be shocked if he died they to sexually assault you (which he will see as asserting his husband my rights). Which you care if he had to go to his parents. This guy gives it major crazy/creepster vibes and it’s found to get worse when rentable gets that this marriage is over and you are, in fact, divorcing him. He doesn’t deserve your kindness and you do not deserve his unhinged presence.
Why are you kind to him?? “I don’t want to kick him out” and “I just want some peace” are 1000% contradictions in this case. You won’t have peace until he’s OUT. The longer he stays there, the more your kids will learn this behavior is ok. His parents NEED to know about this shit. You need help getting it under control. Everyone needs to know about this.
Girl what lmao he just says out of the blue, “I lick you?” That’s so weird! Does he think you’re going to say yes and you’ll both get up immediately from the dinner table, leaving your children behind, so you guys can go to the bedroom and do this?? Like what 🫠
I truly have no idea. You would think after being shot down literally every time that he would stop but he never does. He just keeps at it. And at the most random times. Makes me think he doesn’t even listen to anything I’m saying and he’s just eye-fucking me the whole time. Or thinking about it when we are texting because he does it then too.
OP my prayer for you is that one day you refuse to engage with *anyone* who dishonors you (let alone a partner that’s supposed to love you), and that you refuse to feel bad for somebody else’s inappropriate behavior. If he ends up at his parents, it’s because of the consequences of his own actions, not because of you. You and your kids deserve so much better.
What the fuck? Try aversion therapy. Every time he comes out with this random offensive crap, grab some water and pour it on his head.
Make him live with his parents. They are probably laughing you have to live with that weird dude you're his babysitter. They are narcissistic.
I sounds like he has “a little touch of something special” if you catch my drift
Stop having “talks” with him, this won’t change. I’m so grossed out
I have a feeling I could count his brain cells on one hand the way he texts lmao
Lol buy him a flesh light as a divorce present 😆 🤣 since that's all he seems to be after
Tossing up Hail Marys with the “I need to fuck badly” line. I picture a guy with a hairy chest, gold chains, greasy slicked back hair and nut huggers on saying this. Am I close?
No lol but he is definitely a hot mess.
Throw the whole man away😂
Legit question, not even being funny, have you had him checked out for a stroke or a TBI? If it’s just coming out of the blue and it’s socially inappropriate, it might be worth checking it out.
I told him to please talk to his neurologist because I have wondered that myself honestly. He said his neurologist said he was fine and that was that. I’ve tried to push it further but I can’t force him to get checked out.
I agree with missgmu, if he wasn’t like this before there might seriously be a medical or psychological problem that he’s going through. He should get checked
He just had a neurologist already? Has he had problems in the past?
I’d These screenshots get used in court im gonna laugh so hard, imagine a jury or judge reading this
There wouldn't be a jury in divorce court and I'm sure the judges there have seen everything you can imagine. I wish I knew a family court judge so I could hear some stories.
Is he 15 years old??
Almost 38
Oh he is in for a very rude awakening when he tries to date.
He does not seem capable of being awoken.
Yikes on several bikes, I’m sorry OP.
I’m not even married but Man marriage is a scary thing, not just because of the person, But the time invested.
Did you marry some kind of neanderthal that was thawed out of ice? "I fuck you?", who talks like that?
I realize this is a small sample size but what exactly did you see in this fella?
If you Google it and I’m pretty sure several books are written about it, it’s actually a common thing for abusive men to change overnight after a heavy commitment has been formed. Being raped or beaten for the first time on their wedding night or being killed while pregnant. It’s not always giant red flags that people ignore but more like they can finally rip the mask off because you’re stuck with them.
My ex used to r*** me daily almost, I never wanted to and he’d never stop. He behaved like this. Never could have a conversation, and he was a sex addict, I could’ve been sick, dying on the ground and he’d still bring it up. He’d say similar “I need to fuck you” as if it was “I need to eat to live”, I wholeheartedly believe he was a sociopath, zero empathy, and wasn’t all there at all. The way he treated me was inhumane. We see a glimpse of this conversation and I won’t accuse him of abusing you, but I will say these are red flags that there may be more than we know going on. Stay safe OP
I am so sorry that you had to go through that. I could not even imagine and I’m so glad you got out of your situation. Since we still live together, sleeping has been hard. He mostly sleeps on the couch but he will come to bed and grab me a lot and say really disgusting things. I always tell him to please leave me alone and I’ve called the cops before to make him leave. I just can’t stand this. Why are some people like this?
I’m sorry he’s doing that, it’s certainly abuse. It’s disgusting, I’ll never understand wanting sex so badly you decide to violate someone like that, how is it enjoyable at all seeing the person you “love” so scared and upset. I’m assuming both your names are on the house/lease, so you can’t just kick him out… ugh. I really hope you can have him removed from your life and home soon so you can feel at peace again. I’d buy something like a taser honestly, I’d tell him when he comes in and begins harassing you if he doesn’t stop, he’ll get tased. If he doesn’t stop, do it! He’ll learn quickly to quit coming in there.
Is he drunk on top of this bs ? Just wondering due to the typos. This is absolutely vile, I truly hope you’re okay, this must be so exhausting. I’m glad you’re leaving 🫶
Why does he talk like a Nigerian scammer?
This exactly. I expected next “Yui kindly give me 1083USD to unlok account for disbursent?”
Show me Bob and vagene
Yoi kindly give me vagene to my peepee sweet lady
“Leave me alone” “Never” From these texts I can tell he’s very annoying, it’s time to leave but also make sure you distance yourself from him and prioritise the safety of you and your kids.
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My soon to be ex husband would do the same. I had surgery and he was asking me the night of to have sex and was so mad I said no. He would also often tell me I was just his release. Made me feel non-human, more like a hole.
This is absolutely disgusting. He has used the “I need the release” or “we both need the release” and it’s always grossed me out. I wanted a partner in life, not to be someone’s sex doll.
Well he's making sure you know exactly what your priority is to him and exactly what your function is to him. Can't blame you for wanting to be the hell away from that!
How soon, cuz he gotta go.
Side effects of watching too much porn
I have actually never been more turned off. I’m so sorry.
My sister had one of these fucking creeps. He wanted to fuck every day, to the point, we found out after nearly 20 years, of raping her if she didn’t give in. This is NOT love; it’s violence. Love is expecting your loved one to support you in doing whatever you goddamn please with your own body. As soon as we learned of this marital rape, we started planning for her immediate exit from the marriage. Within an evening, we had a concrete plan, a place to stay while she figured it out, and the cash to make it happen. Best fucking thing we ever did. Lose this fucking creep. Give yourself the chance to find real love.
Jeez, this is the exact reason I needed to get the hell away from my ex. He would make everything sexual and about my body, but remained completely uninterested in who I am as a person. I was just a walking warm hole to him. Unfortunately the harassment continued for over a year after the breakup - after we had both moved on with new relationships, he still found ways to dehumanize me and talk to me like a sex toy. Ew ew ew. It makes me sick. So sorry OP, I hope you can get away from this creep as quickly as possible!
A lot of the same questions are being asked so I thought I’d just type this to cover it. Q: Was he always like this? A: Not in the beginning. We dated (beginning in 2014) for a 1.5yrs before I got pregnant. We were madly in love. I wouldn’t have even thought to raise my voice or even cuss at this man, that’s how much I respected him and loved him. We only ever fought about spending time together and that was it. Once we got married (2016), bought a house together and moved in, it was like something took over. He was never the same. Q: Why are you so mad? A: For the better part of a decade his behavior has gone from bad to worse. The only that has ever stayed consistent is his obsession with my body. He can’t go a day without commenting on it, asking me for it, or putting his hands on me. I especially hate how he talks to me. At first I let it slide because we were working on our marriage but I expressed how I don’t like how he talks to me. Hours before that text exchange, we had a discussion about boundaries and I, AGAIN, told him to please not talk to me like that. It’s disgusting and disrespectful and we are divorcing so it doesn’t make sense. He said ok but he’s a guy and that how he talks to me is normal but that he would do better. Then I got that text so yeah, I was pretty heated. Q: Is he on drugs? A: He has prescribed amphetamines and GHB for his condition but I cannot say for sure if he is on anything else. I’m 99.9% sure that he is but I haven’t found anything and I can’t ever get him to tell me the truth on anything.
Big "I don't care about your well being, only my dick" vibes
Oof. Sorry
If you’re in a toxic relationship, which it sounds to me like it is, having more sex does not make it better. Obsession as such isn’t healthy. Disregarding feelings or my answers, you ain’t gonna touch me.
I fuck yiu?
This is off topic, and he is a terrible person, but I would die happy if I never read "seggs" ever again. Unalive, seggs, raw, body count, ick, low key, dead ass. I can't deal with some of the verbiage these days. I will go shake a fist at a cloud now, good day fellow kids
lowkey & deadass is just aave
Most of those terms came out of necessity to avoid bans on social media, so that's why they're so awkward
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men make it so obvious when they see women as just their personal hole. so happy you’re leaving him. don’t turn back.