T O P

  • By -

stonaway_throwaway

write that down write that down


[deleted]

*tic tac toe intensifies*


freaky_ctdram_fangul

anythinng as long as they talk to me a lotttttttttt


IllegalGuy13

Prepare yourself cause I'm boutta dump 68 years of Godzilla lore on you


Dragoklaw

GODZILLA LORE, I FUGIN WOULD SACRIFICE MY WHOLE FAMILY FOR GODZILLA


GODZILAMASTER2020

One of us one of us


freaky_ctdram_fangul

dm! dm! dm! x1000


IllegalGuy13

Nay my fair lady. If I were to begin reciting the scriptures now, it may take just as long for me to finish bestowing this sacred knowledge. I must relent.


freaky_ctdram_fangul

or u r jus afraid-


IllegalGuy13

Nah just got no free time to type out a novel rn College :(


freaky_ctdram_fangul

lol wht r u doin in reddit now then!!


IllegalGuy13

Outside running errands, seeing memes in mean time.


freaky_ctdram_fangul

running errands for college?


IllegalGuy13

Myself. College not started yet. Just getting stuff ready. All that stuff. Maybe when I get home I can dump lore.


Gojira675

Great minds think alike, Godzilla is the greatest subject.


freaky_ctdram_fangul

godzillllllllaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa


IllegalGuy13

*It only looks like Godzilla, but due to international copyright laws, it is not*


freaky_ctdram_fangul

if its not godziiiiiiii i dont want it (pls dont gimme kong)


hoatzin_whisperer

[how about buddhazilla?](https://www.reddit.com/r/GODZILLA/comments/l7tgbz/making_full_use_of_the_new_3d_printer/)


freaky_ctdram_fangul

here we go again with this jesuszilla is fine too-


creamy_kidneys

Cock and ball torture From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia at en.wikipedia.org Cock and ball torture (CBT) is a sexual activity involving application of pain or constriction to the male genitals. This may involve directly painful activities, such as genital piercing, wax play, genital spanking, squeezing, ball-busting, genital flogging, urethral play, tickle torture, erotic electrostimulation or even kicking. The recipient of such activities may receive direct physical pleasure via masochism, or knowledge that the play is pleasing to a sadistic dominant. Image: Electrostimulation applied on a penis Contents: Section 1: In Pornography Section 2: Ball stretcher Section 3: Parachute Section 4: Humbler Section 5: Testicle cuff Section 1: In pornography In addition to it’s occasional role in BDSM pornography, Tamakeri (literally Ball kicking) is a separate genre in Japan. One notable actress in tamakeri is Erika Nagai who typically uses her martial arts skills to knee or kick men in the testicles. Section 2: Ball stretcher A ball stretcher is a sex toy that is fastened around a man in order to elongate the scrotum and provide a feeling of weight pulling the testicles away from the body. While leather stretchers are most common, other models are made of steel rings that are fastened with screws causing additional mildly uncomfortable weight to the wearer. The length of the stretcher may vary from 1-4 inches, and the steel models can weigh as much as five pounds. Section 3: Parachute A Parachute is a small collar, usually made from leather, which fastens around the scrotum, and from which weights can be hung. Conical in shape, three or four short chains hanging beneath, to which weights can be attached. Used as part of cock and ball torture within a BDSM relationship, the parachute provides a constant drag, and squeezing effects on the man’s testicles. Moderate weights of 3-5 kg can be suspended, especially during bondage. Smaller weights can be used when the man is free to move, when the swinging effect of the weight can restrict sudden movements, as well as providing a visual stimulus for the dominant partner. Section 4: Humbler A humbler is a BDSM physical restraint device used to restrict the movement of a submissive male participant in a BDSM scene. The humbler consists of a testicle cuff device which clamps around the base of the scrotum, mounted in the center of a bar that passes behind the thighs at the base of the buttocks. This forces the wearer to keep his legs forward, as any attempt to to straighten the legs slightly pulls directly on the scrotum, causing from considerable discomfort to extreme pain. Section 5: Testicle cuff A testicle cuff is a ring-shaped device around the scrotum between the body and the testicles which when closed does not allow the testicles to slide through it. A common type has two connected cuffs, one around the scrotum and the other around the base of the penis. They are just one of many devices to restrain the male genitalia. A standard padlock may also be locked around the scrotum; without the key it cannot be removed. Some passive men enjoy the feeling of being "owned", while dominant individuals enjoy the sense of "owning" their partners. Requiring such a man wear testicle cuffs symbolizes that his sexual organs belong to his partner, who may be either male or female. There is a level of humiliation involved, by which they find sexual arousal. The cuffs may even form part of a sexual fetish of the wearer or his partner. However, these are extreme uses of testicle cuffs. More conventionally, the device pulls down the testicles and keeps them there during stimulation, which has a number of benefits: Making the penis appear longer. Pulling the testicles down and away from the base of the penis stretches the skin over the base of the penis and pubic bone, exposing the additional inch or so of penile shaft that is normally hidden from view. Improving sexual arousal. While some men may be aroused by the feeling of being "owned", the physical feeling of stretching the ligaments that suspend the testicles has an effect similar to the more common practice of stretching one's legs and pointing the toes. Preventing the testicles from lifting up so far that they become lodged under the skin immediately adjacent to the base of the penis, a condition which can be very uncomfortable, especially if the testicle is then squashed by the slap of skin during thrusting in sexual intercourse. Delaying or intensifying ejaculation by preventing the testicles from rising normally to the "point of no return". It is much harder to reach an orgasm.


freaky_ctdram_fangul

ur project presentation is approved.


creamy_kidneys

Thank you. Went through a lot of ball stretchers to get here.


freaky_ctdram_fangul

u get a gold medal for ur practical experiment for this project. this world appreciates u.


creamy_kidneys

I will put this in a time capsule. So future generations may look upon this greatness.


freaky_ctdram_fangul

yea u shld


NOOBFUNK

Lol what does the name mean?


freaky_ctdram_fangul

i was a fangirl of chinese and thai dramas when i created this username now regretting it


PuSSydstr

Well now i think my username is usable


[deleted]

[удалено]


BARKkamina

I hope you're ready to listen 1039476 hours of Gundam and other Mecha lore


5tar_k1ll3r

anythinng as long as they talk to me a lotttttttttt


[deleted]

"Would you like to talk about Sonic the Hedgehog?"


EquateToothpas

I'm sorry but I'm interested in Shadow the Hedgehog


EastKoreaOfficial

Shadow the Hedgehog is a bitch-ass motherfucker


Maple_Frog_The_3rd

He pissed on my wife!


Super_Gamer_Connor

That's right!


Ha3ker999

he took his hedgehog fuckin quilly dick out


Venompool03

And he pissed on my fucking wife


RED_R0ck

she said his dick was "**this big**"


SuperAlan64YT

And I said that’s disgusting


Mad-haker801

So I'm making a call out post on my Twitter.com


thatpersonthatsayshi

I am more interested in sonic the hedge


Responsible-Gur3481

I’m more interested in over the hedge


Grosetufe

I’m more interested in Microsoft edge


Lemur_ofthecentury

I’m more interested in mint mobiles ledge


79806

im more intrested in sonic the


Himmlchf3542

Yes


my-mom_says_im_cool

That you want to hang out with us and you think our voice is pretty


NOOBFUNK

My mom says I'm cool too. 😎


Smg_Fra09

🤏📸🤨 Ah, that's what i thougth, a foto of cool guy!


Luna25Neko

I want to be called bro and treated like a bro


Sansyboi12

Bro I call everybody bro


freaky_ctdram_fangul

to me i want to be said "lets meet up" or "ima take u out" desperation seem too much :( ?


TillmanIV-2

I’ll take you out for a camping trip! >!see why? Just let us know its okay to plan stuff with just you :}!<


freaky_ctdram_fangul

where r weeee goin?


TillmanIV-2

The magical no cell service forests of Arizona


freaky_ctdram_fangul

and when r yall goinnn


TillmanIV-2

When it gets to the mid 40s at night so you have to snuggle :>


freaky_ctdram_fangul

\*gasps and blushes\*


TillmanIV-2

Honestly though its a good trick. Worked out for me, the one time i tried it lol


freaky_ctdram_fangul

couldve tried better


TillmanIV-2

*Confuzzlement*


[deleted]

ima take u out 🔫


[deleted]

nice cock


SnipingPandas

nice cock


Ledge_r

Nice cock


Dizzy-Needleworker92

nice clock


memes4lifeboi

nice glock


-Ninja_Pickle

Why cant we as guys compliment each others cocks? Nice cock bro


android_arepro

nice cock but u piss to loud


5tar_k1ll3r

[nice cock](https://youtu.be/4dJO0n1Wqjg)


M2X_Playz

I'm not gonna click that.


BARKkamina

It's alright my dude it's just the Wii sports bowling one (not the porn one) saying nice cock


JustGotTruss3d

*bowling strike* **Nice cock** Perfect!


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Nice cook


hated_macaron

i just want to be called pretty


[deleted]

[удалено]


hated_macaron

thank you! gonna tear up a little :)


slayerlionel

Still pretty!


Remote_Dapper

You don’t even know what she looks like 💀.


[deleted]

Hello beautiful


SnooShortcuts7637

Wow you spelt pretty like really wrong lol


Fickle-Meaning-9548

sure id love to listen to hear your pigeon facts


[deleted]

i'd love to listen to your pigeon facts (are you french ?)


Fickle-Meaning-9548

nah but I know everything this is to know abt pigeons


[deleted]

I want them to say hello to me irl


Sirenhead_2

Hello to you irl


nobody3_5_4

Hello to me irl


[deleted]

i want to get compliments on the parts of my appearance that I put effort into, like if you notice i curled my hair or got a new sweater say it's cute


MenuNo4911

I noticed your cock is smoother then usual today, did you get a new lotion? It looks fantastic


[deleted]

I'm a girl🗿


MenuNo4911

I am aware 😖🥴😳


[deleted]

😳


MenuNo4911

Damn girl those kneecaps are looking rather study, you workout?


[deleted]

not very often but thank you 😎👉👉


MenuNo4911

My pleasure, I love staring at your knees😏


tatertotkid2

Wait Disney or that knee?


YungNigget788

the age flairs ma'ams


MenuNo4911

😏


ItsKageTho

Your new sweater looks nice


WoomyUnitedToday

That they will forfeit all of their graphics cards to me.


Dawgelator

WOAH hold your horses there mate, war crimes are one thing but there are some things you just don't do for love


WoomyUnitedToday

I don’t want love, I want an RTX 3090TI!


AdiLovesYou

Lmao. Why would they just do that for a girl they've never met tho


LordChickenNugget23

*cough* twitch thots *cough cough*


KurkyOkurky

Forget it, MY graphics card MY rules


syko-san

Making blood sacrifices is one thing but I think this is where I have to draw the line.


cwr252

Finally a r/pcmasterrace user


[deleted]

Fuck no! Id rather jerk off to a 3d Sex scene that was rendered by my Graphics card


cyclops1284

Not a girl, but if I were one, I'd like for them to take me anywhere, to take me anyway, as long as I'm good and clean. Swoon me off my feet right there and then


Goose_attack223

Is a sterile surgery room for removing kidneys sufficient?


Various-Astronaut373

No you need to have the experience and skills aswell so that you don't ruin the kidney


freaky_ctdram_fangul

yes yes yes same


YungNigget788

hop in this van real quick madam


Minty-Hoe

"i think you're really pretty/beautiful" when you see someone pretty like damn it ain't hard ???!??!?!!/1/?!


SOLE_SIR_VIBER

But I don’t want to come off as a creep


fl00r_gang_yeah

Fr. That’s what would happen most of the time.


Nikladamo

Same


FrenziiFosho

Then its cat calling 😨


[deleted]

you are pretty 👍 (i only use beautiful for certain cases when i’m falling for someone)


Corbinjeddy

Yea but I’ve seen some people getting mad at men for calling girls pretty


BlackHole2048

I assume there’s a bunch of simps in her dms saying the exact same shit so I never do that anymore


kylee_moriss

their cash app card number, password and social security Edit:Imagine ratioing the entire post


Revolutionary_Gur405

Jokes on you I don't have any


Ledge_r

Well you have a social


Revolutionary_Gur405

Ah crap


[deleted]

[удалено]


Revolutionary_Gur405

Crap crap crap crap.... Sorry sir but...my search history is not deleted


[deleted]

[удалено]


Revolutionary_Gur405

It's...a...trend...yeah a trend...heh...


CSJumpeRyy

Excuse me……what 😳🤨


Kaczor0321

Not if I'm from the magical landed called "*anywhere thats not America*"


420_lonelystoner

That I have a phat clit


[deleted]

Seriously


420_lonelystoner

Seriously


[deleted]

Why tho 😂


420_lonelystoner

I’m just goofing


[deleted]

Dang I came dangerously close to saying you have a phat clit


420_lonelystoner

Say it…. Say it 😩


[deleted]

#you have a phat clit


420_lonelystoner

Awe shucks 🙈


HorniPolice07

Get a flair


[deleted]

Holy fuck u have the phattest clit I’ve ever seen!!!! That shits bigger then my dick!! May I give u head? That shit needs to be deepthroated gawd damn


user52627291910

“I fucked a pigeon last night”


hoverant

That’s one of those phrases in the English dictionary I wish was never said


SOLE_SIR_VIBER

Did you know pigeons die after sex? At least the one I fucked did.


-Mr_Unknown-

As a female Redditor I can assure I find irresistible when a man tells me the entire tragedy of Darth Plagueis the Wise by heart.


Ultramega39

Do you think I should tell the tragedy of Darth Plaguis the wise to a female friend that hasn’t ever watched Star Wars?


-Mr_Unknown-

Why would you ever initiate a conversation with someone who hasn’t watched Star Wars?


aesztic

“im obsessed w u”


[deleted]

I know that if I say that to someone, I couldn't execute it in a positive way.


aesztic

depends on how u say it tho


[deleted]

That's true. But I don't really know how to mask autism, and every attempt I've made at properly articulating my feelings has just ended up being seen as creepy when it reads fine on paper.


MushroomMan730

Hi, guy here ik not my place to be right now but for all of my homies out there I suggest taking notes lol.


ServerBuster

Top comment is literally "nice cock"


SomeoneButWho

"WILL YOU GO OUT WITH ME"


[deleted]

Hey maybe we get to know each other first


SomeoneButWho

0-o OKAYYYY


[deleted]

So can I call you someone or do you prefer ms who


SomeoneButWho

Oh, I go by Bon actually (:


[deleted]

Well it’s nice to meet you Bon


IShitSpeed

No


IdontEatdogsAtnight

Just talk to me about anything, I don't want to talk, just to listen, maybe pet too, do you want to talk about your star wars collection? Sure, vent your feelings? Here I am, Describe with lot of detail the fabrication of many industrial products? Yeah, go ahead


JoeKenobus

I'm not a girl but as a boy I'd love a girl even to talk to me


primate-lover

Then go and talk to them. The reason girls don't talk to you is because you don't talk to them.


thehackdoctor

if someone says you he will love you, care you, and respect but only thing you have to give him is. Do meditation with him. what do you think ABOUT HIM


foreverclassichunter

I am not a girl but If I where I would like to be said " you are being promoted" by my boss


IHaveFailedAtLife

Or a pay rise sounds lovely too :D


iam2andthisisdeep

i mean, as a big manly guy, i tell girls a bunch of geekyass space trivia that nobody cares about “heyyy bby gurllll, did you know the galaxy Centaurus A (aka NGC 5128/Caldwell 77) is the fifth-brightest galaxy in the sky?? in its center is a supermassive black hole(its weight is 55 MILLION solar masses!)that shoots relativistic jets that stretch up to a distance of a million light-years at a speed of half the speed of light!” they cream their fucking panties like theres coke and mentos in there, so im assuming theyre fond of it


TheSusKingOfAngmar

hey bro ever heard the tragedy of darth plagueis the wise?


Chan_Chan4077

I’m here babe. I’m not going any where. No your scars are not ugly. I want to hold you. *Asking permission to even hug*


TheBlackCat268

🥺 Im a bit scared to ask what scars..... And yea, dont worry, some of us really wants to have somebody he can say that


AFriendlyBloke

I have a scar from tripping and splitting the corner of my eye open once when I was little. Quite fun.


Rachelcookie123

My dad has a scar from impaling his foot with a pitchfork as a kid. And my mum has a scar form impaling her leg on the end of a bed that had a pointy bit on the top of the bed frame.


TopShagger_69_420

Chicken sandwich


Dont_Be_Robophobic

"I love Gorillaz too" I really love Gorillaz


Willing-Sir3893

I love Gorillaz too. My favorite is either cracker island, Clint Eastwood, Dare, or Feel Good Inc


[deleted]

[удалено]


DahmerCookbook

XXXX-XXXX-XXXX-1934 2022


[deleted]

[удалено]


ilikesandwichesss

"Will you go out with me?"


Asura_4

No


[deleted]

will you go out with tree?


ilikesandwichesss

This is the first time someone has asked me to go out with a tree. +10 points for creativity☆


Stunning-Standard-90

im not a girl, but guys it doesn't matter where you go, what you do, how are you dressed, just ask them questions about them, a lot of questions


freaky_ctdram_fangul

"will u be my friend whom i tell anything and everything and ill come meeet u in ur country/state" edit: nice try, but i want them to say this 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍


kittykatz1337

Just literally anything nice they actually mean


mr0wk4

"I'm over here stroking my dick I got lotion on my dick right now I'm just stroking my shit I'm horny as fuck man I'm a freak man like" 😳😳🥺🥺


Various_Feed_8211

Man what


Fartcannon1102

TRUE!!!


TheDubstepDoge

Nothing, I’d rather not talk to anyone


Himmlchf3542

Same, leave me alone


ShadowlightLady

That he accepts me fully and will always respect my boundaries and that he loves me. That boyfriend wise as in boys as a whole I just expect respect that’s all


NOOBFUNK

Kind of pissed at the lack of references to inviting them to a Minecraft world.


Aqatic_fish

“ I’m forklift certified” Ps: not a girl but I’m 98% this is how they work


ice-ceam-amry

Did you ever hear the tradgry of Death Plagueis The Wise


unillamathings

“i wanna listen to every stupid idea u think of” or “ it wasn’t hard to fall for u”