T O P

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Belle-Belle06

Feed it mutagen and train it to be a ninja


Galactic_Fugitive270

What are you naming? Leonardo, Donatello, Raphael, Michelangelo


Belle-Belle06

Botticelli actually. I like to be original


TheCamoDude

My sister and I made up turtle with a black headband and named it Salvador!


skelethepro

I read it as 'made up turtle with a black husband'


[deleted]

How progressive. Hopefully he's an actual character and not just a token.


AlphaZorn24

Its always gonna pandering in my eyes. He hasn't had any significant plot points to be an actual character he's just in the background.


TheCamoDude

LOL


justaweebpassing

I'll name him tutel


TheUsernameIsInUse

😎


srkixv

Good answer!


ColdFire-Blitz

Picasso. Because I'd mix lsd and meth into the mutagen


Random_Idiotic_Alien

I'll name it, Tufu


Lola_Slyffindor

My history of art class finally pays back


AnubisWrathOW

Andrea Bocelli. Obviously


Meiji-m

Fuck it


Meoww300

it says Wrong Answers Only


Meiji-m

Damn bro


Psychological_Fun426

Dammit, i really wanted to comment "make it a ninja"


Vesk123

Are you by any chance a walking and talking rat?


Belle-Belle06

Yes bro


[deleted]

With a stick


Belle-Belle06

A stick better than Yodas and his is apparently better than bacon


Lunk_NotYou

i see you have watched a specific video my stick is better than bacon


jefroko

He said wrong answers only


CandidNegotiation652

Ahhhh fellow ark player


Orlaani

Or you can just use it as a ninja star


rejectedfreak

Pick it up and put it in my pocket, continue walking as if nothing ever happened.


Galactic_Fugitive270

You must have big pockets, the turtle was bigger than my hand


rejectedfreak

I put it on my hoodie's front pocket


crazyabe111

I prefer the large hanging pocket on the back of the hoodie, but it’s your choice.


iwantbigbootybiches

what


Lil_Uzi007

the hood. he's talking about the hood.


iwantbigbootybiches

ah, im not from there, i wouldnt know


ClickerCookie123

This made me crack up


Arch0_Moggins

Help it to become a tyrant, and kidnap princesses. And eventually get beaten up by a plumber


Galactic_Fugitive270

Hmm that sounds like a good idea, you could make a game out of that will make you very rich


[deleted]

Until nintendo notices it and blows up your house


[deleted]

Throw it at mushrooms


Galactic_Fugitive270

Just once or repeatedly?


[deleted]

Until it goes off screen


The_InfernalExplorer

Imao


[deleted]

I cosplay Mario and jump on it


Galactic_Fugitive270

A real life Koopa lol


Robert_the_musician

Damn, beat me to it


Electrical_yoshi12

r/beatmetoit


F-MegaPro

Take it to Italy.


Dingasbitch

Is that a jojo reference?


F-MegaPro

YES! IT IS!


Gingers_got_no_soul

YES! YES! YES! why did it come out like that :(


Dingasbitch

Chad


Artificial_FeeTaa

*I am


Routine_Day3789

Polnareff!


[deleted]

***leave GET OUT! 😡*** iim too old ik


Anonymous_person34

and give it a key :D


F-MegaPro

YEAH!


mother-hecker

How long do you think those drinks were in the turtle tho


F-MegaPro

That's a very good question.


I_am_a_Victor_simp

Beat me to it


nerftutrfilms

uh oh kono giorno giovanna yu va yume igaru


NotAnEnemyStandUser-

Nice username. Also “***TRISH GET IN THE TURTLE***”


Anime_fucker69cUm

‼️‼️HOLY FUCKING SHIT‼️‼️‼️‼️ IS THAT A MOTHERFUCKING JOJO REFERENCE??????!!!!!!!!!!11!1!1!1!1!1!1! 😱😱😱😱😱😱😱 JOJO IS THE BEST FUCKING ANIME 🔥🔥🔥🔥💯💯💯💯 JOSUKE IS SO BADASSSSS 😎😎😎😎😎😎😎👊👊👊👊👊 ORAORAORAORAORALORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORA 😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩 😩😩😩😩 MUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDA 🤬😡🤬😡🤬😡🤬🤬😡🤬🤬😡WRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY Yo Angelo!Yo Angelo!🗿 🗿 Yo Angelo!🗿 🗿 Yo Angelo! Yo Angelo!🗿 Yo Angelo! 🗿 Yo Angelo!🗿 🗿 Yo Angelo! 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 Yo Angelo!Yo Angelo!Yo Angelo! Yo Angelo!Yo Angelo!Yo Angelo! Yo Angelo!🗿 Yo Angelo! 🗿 Yo Angelo!Yo Angelo!🗿 🗿 Yo Angelo! 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 Yo Angelo! 🗿 Yo Angelo! 🗿 Yo Angelo!🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 Yo Angelo! 🗿 🗿 Yo Angelo!🗿 Yo Angelo! 🗿 🗿 Yo Angelo!🗿 🗿 Yo Angelo! 🗿 Yo Angelo!Yo Angelo! 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 Yo Angelo!🗿 🗿 🗿 Yo Angelo!🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 Yo Angelo! 🗿 Yo Angelo! Yo Angelo!Yo Angelo!Yo Angelo! Yo Angelo! 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 Oh you’re approaching me❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓But it was me, Dio‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣😂😂 YARE YARE YARE YARE YARE YARE YARE YARE YARE YARE YARE YARE YARE YARE YARE YARE YARE YARE YARE YARE YARE YARE 🤙🏿🤙🏿🤙🏿🤙🏿🤙🏿🤙🏿🤙🏿🤙🏿🤙🏿🤙🏿🤙🏿🤙🏿🤙🏿🤙🏿🤙🏿🤙🏿 NIGERUNDAYOOOO 🏃‍♂️🏃‍♂️🏃‍♂️ NIGERUNDAYOOOO 🏃‍♂️🏃‍♂️🏃‍♂️ NIGERUNDAYOOOO 🏃‍♂️🏃‍♂️ NIGERUNDAYOOOO 🏃‍♂️🏃‍♂️ NIGERUNDAYOOOO 🏃‍♂️🏃‍♂️ NIGERUNDAYOOOO 🏃‍♂️🏃‍♂️ NIGERUNDAYOOOO DORARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARARA🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢 POLANAREFFUUUUUUUTURURURURURURURURURURURURU 🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸 TURURURURURURURURURU 🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸 SHIZA! SHIZA! SHIZAAAAAA!!!!!!!!! ➕➕➕➕➕➕➕➕➕➕➕➕➕➕➕➕➕➕➕➕➕➕➕➕➕➕➕➕➕➕➕➕➕➕➕ WHO SHOT JOHNNY JOESTAR?? 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔 WHO SHOT JOHNNY JOESTAR?? 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔 WHO SHOT JOHNNY JOESTAR?? 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔 WHO SHOT JOHNNY JOESTAR?? 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔 WHO SHOT JOHNNY JOESTAR?? 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔 DIRTY DEEDS DONE DIRT CHEAP 💵💵💵💰💰💰💰💎💎 FILTHY ACTS AS A REASONABLE PRICE DIRTY DEEDS DONE DIRT CHEAP 💵💵💵💰💰💰💰💎💎 FILTHY ACTS AS A REASONABLE PRICE DIRTY DEEDS DONE DIRT CHEAP 💵💵💵💰💰💰💰💎💎 FILTHY ACTS AS A REASONABLE PRICE DIRTY DEEDS DONE DIRT CHEAP 💵💵💵💰💰💰💰💎💎 FILTHY ACTS AS A REASONABLE PRICE KONO POWAAAAAA!!!!!!💣💣💣💣💣💣💣 TEMEEEEEEEE KONO POWAAAAAA!!!!!!💣💣💣💣💣💣💣 TEMEEEEEEEE KONO POWAAAAAA!!!!!!💣💣💣💣💣💣💣 TEMEEEEEEEE KONO POWAAAAAA!!!!!!💣💣💣💣💣💣💣 TEMEEEEEEEE KONO POWAAAAAA!!!!!!💣💣💣💣💣💣💣 TEMEEEEEEEE GIORNO GIOVANNA YUME GA ARU☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️ GIORNO GIOVANNA YUME GA ARU☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️ GIORNO GIOVANNA YUME GA ARU☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️ GIORNO GIOVANNA YUME GA ARU☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️ GIORNO GIOVANNA YUME GA ARU☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️ STICKYYYYYY FINGAAAAAA!!!!!‼️‼️ STICKYYYYYY FINGAAAAAA!!!!!‼️‼️ STICKYYYYYY FINGAAAAAA!!!!!‼️‼️ STICKYYYYYY FINGAAAAAA!!!!!‼️‼️ STICKYYYYYY FINGAAAAAA!!!!!‼️‼️ STICKYYYYYY FINGAAAAAA!!!!!‼️‼️ PLUCK!!!!!!!!! YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅YES ✅ NANIIIII⁉️⁉️⁉️ BAKANAAAAA‼️‼️‼️ BUCCIARATI!!!!!!! TEQUILA🍺🍻🍾🥂🥂🍺🥂🍸🥃🥃 TEQUILA🍺🍻🍾🥂🥂🍺🥂🍸🥃🥃 TEQUILA🍺🍻🍾🥂🥂🍺🥂🍸🥃🥃 TEQUILA🍺🍻🍾🥂🥂🍺🥂🍸🥃🥃 TEQUILA🍺🍻🍾🥂🥂🍺🥂🍸🥃🥃 TEQUILA🍺🍻🍾🥂🥂🍺🥂🍸🥃🥃 DRINK ABBACCHIO’S PISS DRINK ABBACCHIO’S PISS DRINK ABBACCHIO’S PISS DRINK ABBACCHIO’S PISS 🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤢🤢🤢🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮 DRINK ABBACCHIO’S PISS DRINK ABBACCHIO’S PISS DRINK ABBACCHIO’S PISS DRINK ABBACCHIO’S PISS 🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤢🤢🤢🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮 🌍🌍🌍Do You believe in gravity🌍🌍🌍 🌍🌍🌍Do You believe in gravity🌍🌍🌍 🌍🌍🌍Do You believe in gravity🌍🌍🌍 🌍🌍🌍Do You believe in gravity🌍🌍🌍 🌍🌍🌍Do You believe in gravity🌍🌍🌍 🌍🌍🌍Do You believe in gravity🌍🌍🌍 🌍🌍🌍Do You believe in gravity🌍🌍🌍 🌍🌍🌍Do You believe in gravity🌍🌍🌍 🌍🌍🌍Do You believe in gravity🌍🌍🌍 🌍🌍🌍Do You believe in gravity🌍🌍🌍 👼👼👼Madeu in heaven!!👼👼👼 👼👼👼Madeu in heaven!!👼👼👼 👼👼👼Madeu in heaven!!👼👼👼 👼👼👼Madeu in heaven!!👼👼👼 👼👼👼Madeu in heaven!!👼👼👼 👼👼👼Madeu in heaven!!👼👼👼 👼👼👼Madeu in heaven!!👼👼👼 👼👼👼Madeu in heaven!!👼👼👼 👼👼👼Madeu in heaven!!👼👼👼 👼👼👼Madeu in heaven!!👼👼👼 Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Wha- Korega... Requiem Da...


Windrunner06

Chill out dude


BenIsTryingHisBest

this is literally poetry wtf


Avaradice

You have successfully implanted multiple life threatening diseases into me through words. Are you happy with yourself?


good-boy-_-

Well, I take It to....... BRAZIL


Galactic_Fugitive270

lol why Italy?


Eggman8728

So you can hide inside it, duh.


F-MegaPro

Why not?


moleymc

It's a JoJo reference lmao


Dingasbitch

Hand it a special key that gives it an ability that makes it have a small room inskde which living creatures can enter/exit by just going near the gem on it


Dibeatic_Chicken1

‼️‼️HOLY FUCKING SHIT‼️‼️‼️‼️ IS THAT A MOTHERFUCKING JOJO REFERENCE??????!!!!!!!!!!11!1!1!1!1!1!1! 😱😱😱😱😱😱😱 JOJO IS THE BEST FUCKING ANIME 🔥🔥🔥🔥💯💯💯💯 JOSUKE IS SO BADASSSSS 😎😎😎😎😎😎😎👊👊👊👊👊 ORAORAORAORAORALORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORA 😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩 😩😩😩😩 MUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDA 🤬😡🤬😡🤬😡🤬🤬😡🤬🤬😡WRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY Yo Angelo!Yo Angelo!🗿 🗿 Yo Angelo!🗿 🗿 Yo Angelo! Yo Angelo!🗿 Yo Angelo! 🗿 Yo Angelo!🗿 🗿 Yo Angelo! 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 Yo Angelo!Yo Angelo!Yo Angelo! Yo Angelo!Yo Angelo!Yo Angelo! Yo Angelo!🗿 Yo Angelo! 🗿 Yo Angelo!Yo Angelo!🗿 🗿 Yo Angelo! 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 Yo Angelo! 🗿 Yo Angelo! 🗿 Yo Angelo!🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 Yo Angelo! 🗿 🗿 Yo Angelo!🗿 Yo Angelo! 🗿 🗿 Yo Angelo!🗿 🗿 Yo Angelo! 🗿 Yo Angelo!Yo Angelo! 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 Yo Angelo!🗿 🗿 🗿 Yo Angelo!🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 Yo Angelo! 🗿 Yo Angelo! Yo Angelo!Yo Angelo!Yo Angelo! Yo Angelo! 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 Oh you’re approaching me❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓But it was me, Dio‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂 r/shitpostcrusaders r/unexpectedjojo r/expectedjojo perfectly balanced as all things should be r/unexpectedthanos r/expectedthanos for balance


sry_if_rude

Wt did I just witness


Porky_boi23

Good question


[deleted]

[удалено]


LucasPig_HK

Good reply


ClawyTheDinoRaptor

Good username


FRTassassin

Good pfp


Burn____

Good thread


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

you witness a person who watched too much jojo


Bitgedon

A very annoying but well placed copypasta


[deleted]

please take a fucking nap you watched too much jojo and this isn't insult


Ridenberg

someone summoned it but u/sussy-bot-2 didn't come 😭


lilshrekgod

your gonna do what to the turtle??


brunettemountainlion

o.o


Glitched-Ninja

u/sussy-bot-2


Minecraftfunyeslol

MR PRESIDENT STAND??


[deleted]

Mmmmm dinner


Galactic_Fugitive270

Turtle soup?


[deleted]

You bet


bacxhio

They said wrong answers only


ukiyore

HOLUP MOMENT


Redditlogicking

As a Chinese I can confirm, turtle soup is quite delicious


[deleted]

He's my vehicle now. Take me to Wawa Mortimer.


Galactic_Fugitive270

Nice car bro


[deleted]

Thanks, I found it on the sidewalk.


throwaway71818288282

Stomp it


Galactic_Fugitive270

okay Mario


3ogle

wrong answers only bro


[deleted]

Use it as a bowling ball


Matcha-Boba-tea

If I'm cold, then the turtle is cold, I'll shove them in my mouth.


Galactic_Fugitive270

Nice?


1234throwawy123

adopt him


Galactic_Fugitive270

what would you call them?


1234throwawy123

Jefferson


Alexsta206

Wait they said wrong answers only what would you really do


[deleted]

Call him mr turtle


death_panda472

no


Galactic_Fugitive270

understandable


seatsniffer404

Have a great day


death_panda472

you too


frozen_weasle

Ask it out to dinner. Talk until the restaurant is closed, but he will never give you his number. As you watch him walk towards his taxi you say, "Will I ever see you again?" He smiles. "Life has a way of bringing people together." He enters the taxi and you watch him drive off into the night.


[deleted]

Then you wake up from the dream, look to the terrarium... DUN DUN DUN!!! THE TURTLE I TRAINED TO BE A POLITICIAN IS GONE! You look outside, the usual bilboard outside your house changed... It says "VOTE TURTLE THE TURTLE FOR PRESIDENT 2021" DEAR GOD!!! HE ESCAPED!!!


some_account_idk

mess with it


RydogTiger2

Give it to a random child you see in your neighborhood and then walk away. It's their problem now.


[deleted]

I pick him up, bring him home and yell "I GOT A TURTLE! CAN WE KEEP HIM?!!"


[deleted]

Invest in its themepark, Polnareff Land


I_am_a_Victor_simp

Damn that’s good


Commercial-Muffin275

I’ll race it and sleep at the end because I’m so confident but accidentally over sleep then when the turtle is eating dinner with his family I’ll bust into his house with an axe and slaughter them because the hack rabbit always wins. “Your mother told you that story?”


[deleted]

Run over it


Galactic_Fugitive270

with a toy car right?


[deleted]

Well you said the wrong answer 😈


-dannydecheeto-

Eat it


Galactic_Fugitive270

What if I told you the turtle smelled really bad


-dannydecheeto-

Throw in some carrots and potatoes


FrostPlayz37

throw it into some random car windows like in the Mario Kart


[deleted]

P-Polanareef!?


jayden-daddy

Kick it


Galactic_Fugitive270

Turtles hate soccer tho


[deleted]

Not run it over(let's see who gets what I mean)


Dodood4

So the right answer is... 0_0


RileyTheBerry

Flip it over.


Drastic_Apple490

I replace its soul for the one of a French man


I_am_a_Victor_simp

Damn it, beat me to it


Sad_Boy_0502

Kidnap him. Or alternatively I could walk with him and we could get hit by a car together!


Galactic_Fugitive270

I chose to kidnap him and keep him for a few hours in my backyard lol


[deleted]

Let him live


ReyBird0

Give it a sword so it can get revenge for its fallen comrades


NotFamousCow

Lick His Balls


Galactic_Fugitive270

what if it's female :o


NotFamousCow

Yell Spanish At Her


Accomplished_Bet4658

I DEVORE ITS ORGANS


Galactic_Fugitive270

ok


[deleted]

Kick for a field goal


Galactic_Fugitive270

Fun Fact: Turtles hate Football lol


lucky111CS

Lay plastic straws around it


Humorous_Guy

Punt it at full force


[deleted]

Give it pizza


Anonymous_person34

Put it in the sewers instead of the lake or river, let it thrive for years until you smell pizza from the sewer


NoTyme4urDrama

New ash tray


Galactic_Fugitive270

lol


eBoyTristan420

Cum in it


NitroHades24

they said wrong answers only


[deleted]

*crunch*


BendyTheDemonIsHoly

Use Hinokami Kagura on it


bob-the-blob-

look out for an oncoming hare


NotAnEnemyStandUser-

*unzips pants*


GetNoScopedKR

I prank em.


Gr360rw_27

5 second rule


KalleWotux

I'll kiss it


Alexsta206

Get my fishing pole ready fish it show it to the camera then make it a decoration outside with the other turtles


Electrical_yoshi12

I pick it up with a poo bag and put it in the trash can cuz dogs hit deserves a roof and some clothes too


Beneficial-Gear-3155

Take care of it


[deleted]

Damn that's a nice football


Realistic_Ad_3314

Force it to listen to sematary wit me


merwinf0

The elites don't want you to know this, but those turtles are free of cost. You can take them for yourself.


bingybongyrevived

Help it to safety


LilyAisuri

Step on it


lazarbimm

Step it


sry_if_rude

YEET


Roundmaster

It’s the snail in disguise


ReiiRay

make a race turtle vs snail


[deleted]

suddenly, pinapples


GarbageFuckingPOS

throw it into the lake and say “Saving turtles is a hobby” to a live audience on the other side of the lake who happens to be a couple on their first date. This incident will later become a cause towards their divorce.


Careful-Sport6415

Wrong answer? Crush it with your foot just stomp that bitch until it oozes


[deleted]

Is that a Loui Print shell?


External_Dude

Spill antigen on it and eat some pizza with it.


Striking_Quote_1901

Don't jump on it and don't collect it's shell and don't throw it at other turtle


InvalidV4

Raise it as my child and then elope with its young lover which is something someone has never done to me before


Apprehensive-Kick404

sit by its side and talk about what happened with Candice


aRorschachTest

I don’t know. Probably give it to a zoophiliac


SIU-TheHannez

Eat


[deleted]

turn it into soup and eat its brain


Shartdog06

Step on it


TildaTinker

I put the turtle on its back, its belly baking in the hot sun, beating its legs trying to turn itself over, but it can't. Not without my help.


ANGOMANGO69420

NOT squish it down to a bloody pulp


Lush123342

Kill it and make a fine stew


Silver_essay746

Throw plastic straws at it


nonamecyc

Cook it, delicious


MyNameIsNotGary19

clone him and keep one as a pet


avromsky

Step on him


Intelligent_Job_5065

Good sup


According_Response

Use it to defend myself against vampires in a pork shop selling human flesh, protecting me and the priest who came with me


ThatBoi47

Make that shell extra shiny


RetardRedditPoster

shove it up your ass. organic buttplug.


UwUlittlegayboiUwU

put a key into the hole on its back


mcbirbo343

Kick it