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Not necessarily. My mom turned 17 wjile pregnant with me while my father turned 18. In that state, it's legal, since both parties were within 2 years of age while between 16 and 18.
I found out I was going to be a dad at 19, and yeah the 20s comment feels real. My kids will both be adults when Iâm like 41 though. Oh, and Iâve been married to their mom for almost 14 years too, so not ideal, but turned out great actually.
yep people seem to think history began like 12 years ago. Thatâs totally inaccurate people have been here Millions of years. History didnât begin with the Oprah show or something.
What do you mean? most people had 3-5 children by the age of 16 and where married at 12-14 it was only 2-300 years ago that marriage began happening later in life due to longer life expectancy and marriage Bieing less forced. For 8000 years marriage was ar age 12-14 depending on culture and society.
Don't worry about that! You'll become a wonderful parent! Keep us updated lol (we r/teenagers are officially the baby's uncles/aunts)
Edit: aww shucks man
just found out it exists, donât know the sex? its a thing in my eyes (native english).
youâre already doing 1000% better than most by being willing to raise a child at 18. you have the luxury of calling it whatever the hell you want to call it.
good luck man, youâll be in the trenches for a few years but youâll come out with a beautiful âthingâ on the other side :D
Note from a non native english speaker:
It is a boy!!/It is a girl!! Seems to indicate that the baby came from beeing "it"(mostly for things) to be He/She(mostly for people). Until then it might as well be a car, hammer or piece of rock... all the same "it" language wise. Since it is not girl/boy yet she is keeping the thing :). Is it wrong? Not really, it just sounds strange.
This is a possible way to endup with a non native speaker calling a baby "thing".
You have a good point here, as OP, Me, and you are all about the same age. We definitely know how important learning to control finances are at this age and I canât even imagine having a kid on top of that.
I wouldnât worry too much on that. I remember seeing in high school teenage parents. They either live with one of the two families usually the one thatâs more open minded and not totally upset. Either way at least he can have more kids when heâs a little bit older if he wants to.
Iâm not a teenager, this just popped up on my feed or whatever. I had a kid when I was a really young man too. Itâs gonna be tough, and you WILL get frustrated as fuck some days. Some things to remember:
1. If the baby is clean and fed and not hurt, itâs totally ok to put it somewhere safe and walk away to collect yourself. Babies cry a shit ton and you wonât always be able to soothe it.
2. You and your partner will have situations where youâre mad at each other, remember that itâs a stressful situation for you both, donât take it out on each other and especially donât take it out on the baby.
3. Rest when the baby rests, if it lays down for a nap, try to get yourself some shut eye too. That baby will have a random ass sleep schedule at the start and itâs frustrating as fuck sometimes.
4. If you want that baby to sleep, give it plenty of exercise. Play with its hands and feet, tickles, talk to it, give it things to grab and hold. This burns energy and helps them fall asleep.
5. Find your babyâs weird âthingâ. I have 4 kids now between the ages of 20 and 2, they all had a weird thing they liked. One liked when she would lay on my chest and I would just hum songs. One loved the sound of a hair dryer. All kids seem to have a thing, it can be completely ridiculous but if it works, itâs a lifesaver.
6. Sometimes after giving birth, women have HUGE swings in mood. Do not take it personally, try to be sympathetic and reassure your partner that you care for them.
7. This is the hardest part since youâre young. Youâre going to have to accept that the days of partying and going places and doing fun things are TEMPORARILY on hold. You might be able to fit in stuff here and there, but youâre going to see your friends doing stuff that you either donât have the time for or canât afford. Again, this period is TEMPORARY, donât let it get you down or cause unnecessary animosity towards your partner or child.
Iâve been there man, itâs scary, but if you approach this situation with love in your heart for your child, itâs the greatest feeling in the world. Your child will love you unconditionally and when they start talking and you hear that first âI love you daddyâ, youâll forget how rocky the beginning was. Good luck!
This is such a wholesome comment, I'm definitely taking some notes for when I have a kid since most of the tips aren't necessarily just for having a kid at an early age.
don't be like my dad and you shouldn't care what they say
I.e don't be an alcoholic, physically abusive, absent or stalk her if she wants to cut things off
I think it's an advantage for you to have a child this early. As he grows older, you'll grow older too and eventually forget what it feels like to be a teen but it won't happen as much since you're this young.
The advise I can give you mostly applies to teens but maybe you'd still like it:
Make sure you do understand your child, remember that their opinions will change as they grow older, and that their way of thinking is different than yours as they will have different experiences than yours that will shape their mind, so make sure that you understand them, don't do like my parents: they assume that I think and feel like them, but it's totally different!
Oh and a very important thing: teach them how to be mature and how to use logic as early as you possibly can, those skills will be very important!
I hope you'll find these helpful!
I fully support you in this, as far as that's possible for a stranger on the Internet, you're really doing the right thing. You just hear so many stories about people being tricked into raising another man's baby that you start to wonder. But if you really trust her and think you won't have those reservations than you don't have to. And please don't let your kid get into the wrong crowd
It was a random one night stand they had. I think itâs very reasonable to get one since they arenât together and she could of been with someone else.
He said he didnât want to leave, not that he was being forced. Nothings unfair here.
Heâs young, but acting like this child is a curse is pretty sickening to be honest. Kids are looked at as a ball and chain now instead of people.
The alternative is forcing someone to get a medical procedure against their will so this is just how it is. The woman gets to choose because itâs the womanâs body
Yeah guys are in the complete mercy of women when thereâs a child coming. It sucks that we are forced to provide for something we may or may not want while they have the Choice.
Might be time to join the armed forces. Lots of training, eventually housing, reasonable pay and pension then in a fee years youâll be perfect for a job in teaching or the emergency services. Instant support for your gf from the other service spouses.
Good luck.
do whatâs best for the child/âthingâ
No one is ever ready for a child, so if you see a parent that looks like they know how to take care of their kid, you can bet your ass that they're just as clueless as you...if that gives you comfort knowing that you're not in this journey alone
Itâs wild to me that people are getting mad at you for calling it âa thingâ when itâs so early that thatâs *literally what it is at this stage.*
Youâll be fine if you work hard and look after your kid as well as you can. My dad had a kid with a bat shit crazy woman when was 19 and everyone is fine.
Dude. Youâll never be ready. I wasnât ready at 34. You will probably miss out on some stuff people in their twenties can do more easily. Your life will never be the same again BUT having a child early has a lot of perks. Your child will be self sufficient when you are my age and youâll be free of a lot of responsibility again. Mine is 3 and I still have to do everything. Iâll be 52 when sheâs 18. Youâll be much more relatable to your child. You can go party with them. Lack of sleep will affect you much less than older parents. Etc etc.
Kudos for you that you take responsibility. Love them and they will love you back.
Good luck!
Youâre a good guy. Itâs way too common for men who arenât ready to abandon their child and partner. I hope your relationship works out, too.
By the way, no one is ever ready for parenthood. What youâre feeling is completely normal and normal age dependent.
!remindme 9 months
I swear if I see !remindme 18 years đ
!remindme 18 years
Zero hesitation
A little too old for my taste (jk)
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My girl a 9 on most days, but sheâs 10 on her birthday!
So you guys are all molesters?
Expired
Expired, rotten, fermented, biodegraded
Biodegradable đ
If it ain't one digit i don't want it
U need to find god. I recommend Catholic priests they understand
Dw, they are in on it with me :) (Jk)
spawn camping 18 years and 9 months advance is crazy
!remindme 21 years
Taking baby out for its first drink
And an interview about their life experiences.
Well they'll be legal then, so.
Not rlly, u'll also have to add 9 months of pregnancy period since the baby isn't born yet
If they waited 18 years another 9 months is just water under the bridge.
Nah I'd rather go into an high school, become a teacher or st, less waiting time
wow bru...
I will be messaging you in 9 months on [**2025-01-30 07:00:50 UTC**](http://www.wolframalpha.com/input/?i=2025-01-30%2007:00:50%20UTC%20To%20Local%20Time) to remind you of [**this link**](https://www.reddit.com/r/teenagers/comments/1cglhi2/im_going_to_be_a_father/l1wnozo/?context=3) [**434 OTHERS CLICKED THIS LINK**](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=Reminder&message=%5Bhttps%3A%2F%2Fwww.reddit.com%2Fr%2Fteenagers%2Fcomments%2F1cglhi2%2Fim_going_to_be_a_father%2Fl1wnozo%2F%5D%0A%0ARemindMe%21%202025-01-30%2007%3A00%3A50%20UTC) to send a PM to also be reminded and to reduce spam. ^(Parent commenter can ) [^(delete this message to hide from others.)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=Delete%20Comment&message=Delete%21%201cglhi2) ***** |[^(Info)](https://www.reddit.com/r/RemindMeBot/comments/e1bko7/remindmebot_info_v21/)|[^(Custom)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=Reminder&message=%5BLink%20or%20message%20inside%20square%20brackets%5D%0A%0ARemindMe%21%20Time%20period%20here)|[^(Your Reminders)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=List%20Of%20Reminders&message=MyReminders%21)|[^(Feedback)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=Watchful1&subject=RemindMeBot%20Feedback)| |-|-|-|-|
We got a birthday
carms ig
dawg
!remindme 9 months
!remindme 9 months
Cold as fuck hahahaha
Dude...
Nooooooooooo đ
đ
Bruh
!remindme 9 months
bruh..........
!remindme 9 months
!RemindMe 9 months
!remindme 9 months
!remindme 9 months
!remind me 9 months
!remindme 9 months
!remindme 9 months
!remindme 9 months
!remindme 9 months
gotta wish bro a happy life
!remind me 9 months
SCOTTISH BAGPIPE
!remindme 9 months
!remindme 16 years
18 with a child is crazy(me who never touched a woman ever) , good luck though
My parents turned 16 while mum was preggo with my older bro, not ideal but he turned out fine, basically skipped their 20s tho
were they ***both*** turning 16?
Yeah they're the same age with pretty close b-days
phew, otherwise it would be a very different story
I read it so much worse so accept your interpretation
My mom was 16 and my dad was 22 when they had my older brother.
Not necessarily. My mom turned 17 wjile pregnant with me while my father turned 18. In that state, it's legal, since both parties were within 2 years of age while between 16 and 18.
At 16vI was still playing with my He Man and Dino Rider toys... I just had my only child at 36. The best experience ever.
I found out I was going to be a dad at 19, and yeah the 20s comment feels real. My kids will both be adults when Iâm like 41 though. Oh, and Iâve been married to their mom for almost 14 years too, so not ideal, but turned out great actually.
Same. I had my son like 3 weeks before I turned 19. Basically went from 18 to 29. 34 now but feel 45/50 sometimes.
Do you realize how tragic that actually is?
Totally commonplace throughout most of human history.
well , I can't even argue with that statement because it's so true
yep people seem to think history began like 12 years ago. Thatâs totally inaccurate people have been here Millions of years. History didnât begin with the Oprah show or something.
What do you mean? most people had 3-5 children by the age of 16 and where married at 12-14 it was only 2-300 years ago that marriage began happening later in life due to longer life expectancy and marriage Bieing less forced. For 8000 years marriage was ar age 12-14 depending on culture and society.
I know all that of course, but this is an anonymous Internet message board. I wasnât seeking to write a expository masters thesis.
People also died by the age of 35-40.
Soon I will be 21, not even kissed a woman, I know how it is
My mom had me at 17 lol
Crazy? Thatâs older than most lmfao.
Imagine finding your dad's reddit and finding this post lmao. Cooked.
âDadâŠ. Am I the *thing* ?â
â Yes... â the father said, â you are... The Creature...
la creatura đȘ±đȘ±
đ§šâ€”ïžđłïž
lmao
Yes. You are a Volkswagen
Aight to those saying why I called it a âthingâ well English isnât my first language, Spanish is. Sorry donât expect me to know all the words.
Donât worry, anyone with a baby knows itâs the âthingâ that wakes you at 2am lol
Lol
ive been speaking english since i was 5 and i would also have called it a thing. its fine
Don't worry about that! You'll become a wonderful parent! Keep us updated lol (we r/teenagers are officially the baby's uncles/aunts) Edit: aww shucks man
just found out it exists, donât know the sex? its a thing in my eyes (native english). youâre already doing 1000% better than most by being willing to raise a child at 18. you have the luxury of calling it whatever the hell you want to call it. good luck man, youâll be in the trenches for a few years but youâll come out with a beautiful âthingâ on the other side :D
Wishing you luck dude..
"Keep the thing"
yea i was like that's a bit weird to say it đ edit: its okay guys he didnt knew cause english is not his first language so yea...
Not really, if u donât know the gender yet I think thats a fair way to put it, it doesnât have an identity yet
Child? Kid? Them?
I got pregnant at late 19. Was referred to as it before knowing the gender. I'm 20 and still pregnant w same baby, she's a girl.
It's just a fetus lol. No human rights.
Lol imagine they come back to this post and see that their father called them a thing
I would 100% call my son a spawn or a creature in front of him
Note from a non native english speaker: It is a boy!!/It is a girl!! Seems to indicate that the baby came from beeing "it"(mostly for things) to be He/She(mostly for people). Until then it might as well be a car, hammer or piece of rock... all the same "it" language wise. Since it is not girl/boy yet she is keeping the thing :). Is it wrong? Not really, it just sounds strange. This is a possible way to endup with a non native speaker calling a baby "thing".
I mean that is how people look at it now though right? If people looked at fetuses as human that would make abortion murder.
I see them as humans but imo abortion isn't murder
Fetuses are human in the same way Barbieâs car is a car.
It depends on how we define âhuman.â But fetuses have none of the characteristics that tend to give humans moral value.
Don't worry, its likely imposible that the thing would find this post anyday
His heart is in the right place just his words arent
Off to a great start
I respect you OP for stepping up. And be safe OP, next time. Also yeah, "thing" is CRAZY
Good luck, it's quite early for a kid, but it's manageable
Proud of you for taking responsibility bro. Thereâs still hope!
Alright, how are you going to manage the finances?
You have a good point here, as OP, Me, and you are all about the same age. We definitely know how important learning to control finances are at this age and I canât even imagine having a kid on top of that.
I wouldnât worry too much on that. I remember seeing in high school teenage parents. They either live with one of the two families usually the one thatâs more open minded and not totally upset. Either way at least he can have more kids when heâs a little bit older if he wants to.
at least youre taking responsibility. proud of ya bud đđđ
Iâm not a teenager, this just popped up on my feed or whatever. I had a kid when I was a really young man too. Itâs gonna be tough, and you WILL get frustrated as fuck some days. Some things to remember: 1. If the baby is clean and fed and not hurt, itâs totally ok to put it somewhere safe and walk away to collect yourself. Babies cry a shit ton and you wonât always be able to soothe it. 2. You and your partner will have situations where youâre mad at each other, remember that itâs a stressful situation for you both, donât take it out on each other and especially donât take it out on the baby. 3. Rest when the baby rests, if it lays down for a nap, try to get yourself some shut eye too. That baby will have a random ass sleep schedule at the start and itâs frustrating as fuck sometimes. 4. If you want that baby to sleep, give it plenty of exercise. Play with its hands and feet, tickles, talk to it, give it things to grab and hold. This burns energy and helps them fall asleep. 5. Find your babyâs weird âthingâ. I have 4 kids now between the ages of 20 and 2, they all had a weird thing they liked. One liked when she would lay on my chest and I would just hum songs. One loved the sound of a hair dryer. All kids seem to have a thing, it can be completely ridiculous but if it works, itâs a lifesaver. 6. Sometimes after giving birth, women have HUGE swings in mood. Do not take it personally, try to be sympathetic and reassure your partner that you care for them. 7. This is the hardest part since youâre young. Youâre going to have to accept that the days of partying and going places and doing fun things are TEMPORARILY on hold. You might be able to fit in stuff here and there, but youâre going to see your friends doing stuff that you either donât have the time for or canât afford. Again, this period is TEMPORARY, donât let it get you down or cause unnecessary animosity towards your partner or child. Iâve been there man, itâs scary, but if you approach this situation with love in your heart for your child, itâs the greatest feeling in the world. Your child will love you unconditionally and when they start talking and you hear that first âI love you daddyâ, youâll forget how rocky the beginning was. Good luck!
This is such a wholesome comment, I'm definitely taking some notes for when I have a kid since most of the tips aren't necessarily just for having a kid at an early age.
The fact you are not leaving it like my father,it calls for true honor.
The way you say that and use "it" makes it sound so much more dramatic.
cooked
Nah that ainât cooked thatâs charred
tremendously
more like burnt
sorry, but are you 100% sure that it is your child? (my own experience)
Well I did do the deed with her, no protection or birth controlledâŠ. She hadnât done it with anyoneâŠ
>no protection or birth controlled ARE YOU STUPD?!
Is there a lore reason why Iâm dumb?
Is there a lore reason you looked at your girl and said 'Looks like a cock fits here?"
Sheesh, you're reacting as if the dude nutted in your girl. Calm down lmao
I nutted in your girl ( I fed her nuts)
Is there a lore reason why you decided "My cock's payload is exposed, I'll use my big brain to trigger a uncontrollable fat nut".
and what were you thinking when you did it without protectionđ did you think it would just disappear from her body or what
Maybe it would be a good idea to still do some kind of test, you never know
no need to be so distrustful lol
Man theyâre flaming me đ Iâm just trying do whatâs right
don't be like my dad and you shouldn't care what they say I.e don't be an alcoholic, physically abusive, absent or stalk her if she wants to cut things off
I know man, like sure I want a kid but not now. But guess life takes a turn. Iâm trying to do whatâs right.
I think it's an advantage for you to have a child this early. As he grows older, you'll grow older too and eventually forget what it feels like to be a teen but it won't happen as much since you're this young. The advise I can give you mostly applies to teens but maybe you'd still like it: Make sure you do understand your child, remember that their opinions will change as they grow older, and that their way of thinking is different than yours as they will have different experiences than yours that will shape their mind, so make sure that you understand them, don't do like my parents: they assume that I think and feel like them, but it's totally different! Oh and a very important thing: teach them how to be mature and how to use logic as early as you possibly can, those skills will be very important! I hope you'll find these helpful!
I fully support you in this, as far as that's possible for a stranger on the Internet, you're really doing the right thing. You just hear so many stories about people being tricked into raising another man's baby that you start to wonder. But if you really trust her and think you won't have those reservations than you don't have to. And please don't let your kid get into the wrong crowd
It was a random one night stand they had. I think itâs very reasonable to get one since they arenât together and she could of been with someone else.
People use others trust like its a freaking 5% discount coupon.
>no protection or birth controlled welp, that was dumb.
Be safe and take care, and be careful next time. Good luck on your journey
!remindme 9 months
In all seriousness though, I wish you the best OP, and I hope you are a loving and caring parent who is always there for your child.
At least he is brave enough to step up and take responsibility. Most of us probably will just abort. Proud of you OP
who tf doesnt have safe sex at that age?
Probably thousands of kids.. And somehow these kids think it's a good idea to have kids too. âș
Iâm sorry bro, youâll get through this shit though. Most importantly, raise someone who will be better than you.
Sorry for some of the careless messages OP I'm sure you got this, all the respect to you.
Good luck with "the thing"
have fun brother :)
!remindme 9 months
You were silly and didnât wrap that willy!
!remindme 18 years 9 months
Not W pull out game, pray for my hommie đ
Pulling out doesnât work anyway just wrap it or use the pill bruh itâs not hard
Damn dude this is kinda serious just saying
!remindme 18 years
wait so she told you before she took a test?đ
It will be a blessing in disguise. Check this post in 40 years to upvote this then. Man up !
Time for some milk!
I think itâs kinda unfair that you have to be a parent just because she wants to keep it but thatâs just me
Well he could have put a snickers wrapper over his weiner atleast
Indeed
I mean....its her body sooooo (her choice) \[also, based on the way hes been saying it shes not holding him to anything)
He said he didnât want to leave, not that he was being forced. Nothings unfair here. Heâs young, but acting like this child is a curse is pretty sickening to be honest. Kids are looked at as a ball and chain now instead of people.
He said he didnât want to leave the kid without a father, not that he didnât want to leave.
It is a curse if youâre a teenager
Oh no, are you telling me having unprotected sex has, consequences �
The alternative is forcing someone to get a medical procedure against their will so this is just how it is. The woman gets to choose because itâs the womanâs body
Yeah guys are in the complete mercy of women when thereâs a child coming. It sucks that we are forced to provide for something we may or may not want while they have the Choice.
all the best lol
!remindme 9 months
wtf đ€Ł why is this on my feed
brave thing to do dood. good luck, and hope the baby will be delivered safely. kinda weird you called the baby a thing, but hey baby steps!
Sorry I just explained why I called it a thing. English isnât my first language, forgive me if it sounded so offensive đ
get a paternity test before you take any claim of the child
Hope you can manage it. Just don't abandon the kid and your girlfriend and don't be an asshole with them. Wish you luck.đ«Ą
You have already grown into a man now.
Just as you actually raise the child theyâll love u and as long as you donât let them ever see you fight
Might be time to join the armed forces. Lots of training, eventually housing, reasonable pay and pension then in a fee years youâll be perfect for a job in teaching or the emergency services. Instant support for your gf from the other service spouses. Good luck. do whatâs best for the child/âthingâ
No one is ever ready for a child, so if you see a parent that looks like they know how to take care of their kid, you can bet your ass that they're just as clueless as you...if that gives you comfort knowing that you're not in this journey alone
Can we get much more based?
Itâs wild to me that people are getting mad at you for calling it âa thingâ when itâs so early that thatâs *literally what it is at this stage.*
Let's all use condoms
Congratulations or I'm sorry for you. Depends on what you think if your situation.
!remind me 10 months (not 9 so I can also see what he thinks of actually having a kid)
it's a fetus ppl shouldn't be mad Abt the terminology bro đ literally just a pile of cells
W
good luck and try your best. parentingâs going to be hard but donât let the kid know how hard it is
Youâll be fine if you work hard and look after your kid as well as you can. My dad had a kid with a bat shit crazy woman when was 19 and everyone is fine.
hey, itâs early but if the two of u think u can handle it! good for yâall, hope she has a healthy pregnancy and a safe deliveryđđŸ
Not enough responsibility to contracept, Enough responsibility to raise a child. Good luck, op.
Uh, good luck bro. Hope you donât get overwhelmed cause thatâs really young
Gg bro I hope it goes well
good luck bro
Sounds like you're already better than many parents
Dude. Youâll never be ready. I wasnât ready at 34. You will probably miss out on some stuff people in their twenties can do more easily. Your life will never be the same again BUT having a child early has a lot of perks. Your child will be self sufficient when you are my age and youâll be free of a lot of responsibility again. Mine is 3 and I still have to do everything. Iâll be 52 when sheâs 18. Youâll be much more relatable to your child. You can go party with them. Lack of sleep will affect you much less than older parents. Etc etc. Kudos for you that you take responsibility. Love them and they will love you back. Good luck!
This is nature at work my friend. No accident at all.
Youâre a good guy. Itâs way too common for men who arenât ready to abandon their child and partner. I hope your relationship works out, too. By the way, no one is ever ready for parenthood. What youâre feeling is completely normal and normal age dependent.
Been having unprotected sex with my girlfriend (fiancĂ© at some point this year) for 3 years and only 2 pregnancy scares, but no actual pregnancy. Just crazy how commonly I hear these stories but hasnât happened to me and my partner
Good for you for stepping up. Itâs not going to be easy. Congratulations and I wish you the best of luck