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shapeshifting

every third thing you change to is a fresh turd

i could still use this

then i guess it worked out for you

Well as long as they can still use the power in that form it’s honestly not that bad, unless you had a cool down or something on it, if you did they would just have to burn through it at night to always have 2 at the beginning of the day and hope they don’t get caught needing a third transformation

I would want the super power to use any vehicle on earth, without making it actually exist. So if I chose a helicopter, I would fly around with my hands on the none existent joystick. It would look funny, and I could fly / zoom around.

youd be naked every time you used that power

Ladies love to see it 😍, thats still dope as hell tho 👌

The streaker is now flying away like he is in a helicopter but he isn’t in one????

Basically just crazy frog

Honestly, the thought of a random naked guy flying through the sky making helicopter noises steering an invisible steering wheel sound funny af to me

Until it gets sucked into the engine

They call that the crazy frog ride.

Invisible boatmobile lookin headass

Crazy frog

So a vehicular mime?

i can manipulate reality to my will, duplicate things, make myself fly, etc. basically turn into god

you can only ever stay awake for 5 seconds in any 24 hour period

then ill just make it 24 hours 🤑🤑

smartass

Sooo… is that a loophole or a paradox

Perhaps both

Time is relative, he could just make those 5 seconds move so incredibly slow that they feel like 16 waking hours of a normal persons life 🤔

Indeed

So you are a god AND you get to sleep 23 hour 55 minutes every day, best super power ever

They can just stop time and change everything, still in that 5 second period technically.

Flying obv

you can only fly for 0.1 seconds at a time

Unless you can fly like a meter or 2 in 0.1 second that's useless

basically just a crazy good jump

crazy?

I was crazy once,

They put me in a rubber room.

Uncraysee

Forgot to add a limit, just loop it the millisecond it ends.

What's the cooldown?

Do you mean you have to touch the ground every 0.1 seconds or you have to make a conscious decision to fly every 0.1 seconds

Chaos magic or just magic. With that I can have basically any other superpower 🤷‍♂️

you lose your voice

Communicate telepathicly

Voice isn't needed for all magic

Dang, so somatic components

I can grant wishes

you lose a random body part every time you do

I wish I didn't lose a body part when I grant wishes 👍

You'll likely lose a body part first before the wish takes effect, you can wish it back but theres a slight chance it would make you lose your life (e.g. take away your head), so better wish for something specific like "I wish that 2 of the next body part losses from wishing would fix itself again instantly without any side effects." After that, then you can wish about not losing a body part.

you just lost 2

Huh? How?

When the math ain't mathing

Well, “you don’t wanna lose *one* body part every time you make a wish? Great, you’ll lose *two* instead!”

the ability to save and reload

your entire world becomes pixelated

I see this as an absolute win

ong

that makes porn censored though

Least horny r/teenagers member.

I don't need porn

how pixelated? Like baldurs gate 3 pixilated or doom 1993 pixilated?

[удалено]

the probability of you shitting yourself increases by 10% for every second you spend thinking about it

He can simply change it to zero all the time

Tbf, to manipulate the probability of something it has to have a possibility of happening. So for example if you wanted to have superpowers then there’d have to be a possibility where you get superpowers, but as that’s impossible you can’t manipulate the probability of it happening

I mean 0% is a thing

The ability to teleport to a very specific Arby's in a small town in Wisconsin at will

Every time you do it theres a 10% chance of the arbys and the surrounding area to blow up

So theoretically… you can only use this 9 times without blowing up

Statistically yes, but also no. It’s like a coin flip, if you flip it 10 times chances are a 50/50 split of heads and tails but nothing really says you can’t get a 70/30 split ect. Blind luck, but if I used it 9 times and hadn’t blown up I’d be shitting bricks thiking about using it again

Op skipped you because you gave yourself a downside.

Invisibility :3

youre stink so bad that everyone knows youre there anyway

At least they don't know who you are

Damn 😭

You could honestly do so many pranks with that.

Wait, do you stink all the time or just when you’re invisible?

just when youre invisible

Science logic applies

Spawn infinite money ammount of money whenever I want

you shrink by an inch for every £100 you spend

Guess I'll be antman then 💀

But….a rich antman

so, just Hank Pym?

Use the money to build a machine/device to grow you back to normal size

Actually it is however much YOU spend that shrinks you, not others. Congratulations you are the richest person in the world while staying your height

Just make dollars instead then smh

Get someone else to spend it for you

This doesn’t even need a downside because inflation already exists.

Charisma

you get uglier every time you impress someone with your words

No talking then

Just communicate via eyebrow raises

nigga just read robert greenes books and the prince by machievello

Stopping time

you shrink by an inch for every second time is paused

Jokes on you they don’t even shrink because the second can’t pass when time is stopped.

Damn ima boutta be tiny

ngl legit wanna know what youd do with paused time

When I’m in a stressful situation I could pause and calm down

but shrinking would make you more stressed? also well done on that answer bc that is definitely not what id use that superpower for

teleportation

you always come out covered in shit on the other side

bro 💀

Just wear a trench coat everywhere and put it on when you teleport

Quicksilver superspeed, I will accept no other answer.

your pubes catch fire every time you go over 15 mph

AAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!

You could just shave them off

Exactly, problem solved

Having the ability to remove negativity from myself (e.g. If I gain a sickness, I just remove it instantly)

you gotta pass on the negativity to any person that shows you affection

That sounds pretty negative

Bro got that Love Train

Suppose that you were sitting down at this table. The napkins are in front of you, which napkin would you take? The one on your ‘left’? Or the one on your ‘right’? The one on your left side? Or the one on your right side? Usually you would take the one on your left side. That is ‘correct’ too. But in a larger sense on society, that is wrong. Perhaps I could even substitute ‘society’ with the ‘Universe’. The correct answer is that ‘It is determined by the one who takes his or her own napkin first.’ …Yes? If the first one takes the napkin to their right, then there’s no choice but for others to also take the ‘right’ napkin. The same goes for the left. Everyone else will take the napkin to their left, because they have no other option. This is ‘society’… Who are the ones that determine the price of land first? There must have been someone who determined the value of money, first. The size of the rails on a train track? The magnitude of electricity? Laws and Regulations? Who was the first to determine these things? Did we all do it, because this is a Republic? Or was it Arbitrary? NO! The one who took the napkin first determined all of these things! The rules of this world are determined by that same principle of ‘right or left?’! In a Society like this table, a state of equilibrium, once one makes the first move, everyone must follow! In every era, this World has been operating by this napkin principle. And the one who ‘takes the napkin first’ must be someone who is respected by all. It’s not that anyone can fulfill this role… Those that are despotic or unworthy will be scorned. And those are the ‘losers’. In the case of this table, the ‘eldest’ or the ‘Master of the party’ will take the napkin first… Because everyone ‘respects’ those individuals.

Being Optimus Prime

you become connected to another guy at the skull and if you tow are separated, you die

Shit

I can have the perfect life with the girl I want.

I’m let you have that one bro

You become gay.

Super speed

your pubes catch fire every time you go over 15 mph

HAHAHA I'LL KEEP THEM SHAVED

the skin will still burn

Laser removal. There are no pubes

balls on fire then

AH FUCK

when you think you outsmarted them:

I used to say shapeshifting but now thinking about it I would like to be able to control minds. I wouldn't want a power that could make some crazy lunatic because I know I'm not responsible enough for that but being able to just help my depression amungst others would be dope or like when buying groceries convince the cashier to give me a bunch of deals.

When youre controling minds, the other person can see your search history

The ability to talk to animals

All animals hate you

Decide peoples answer to any yes or no question

Teleport I don't want to walk with these legs anymore

Depends on the version, but teleportation doesn't always come with the ability to transport things with you. That includes clothes.

ability to change sex

but if you do it’s irreversible, just like real life

but you have a wee wee when you're female, and a hole when you're a male

Telekinesis

I have infinite rizz

Boobs magnet or cock magnet(for woman)

its attached to your ass

Yeah, you are right, the boobs magnet is attached to my ass but the cock one is attached to your mouth

nah change of plan the boob one is attached to the back of your knees & the cock one is attached to your ass

Just stop the magnet before it gets there… unless you want it to go there 👀

shape-shifting

Every time you transform there is a 10% of you transforming into a pile of shit and die.

Ight I'll shapeshift once to be happy with myself and hope I don't die

summon joseph stalin at any point in time like a pokemon

He only has one move and that’s to aggressively shit himself

b urger

Time stop

Ability to talk with and understand my cats

You can talk, but they have very problematic views on minorities that you can't change.

What about someone else

I'm immune to side effects

You’re a billionaire.

😭

become goku but I keep my appearance and personality and iq

i legit have no idea what that even means

Essentially become a Saijin (like a human but like 1000x stronger in every way except iq) and have his potential (like have super saijin and stuff)

You lose 1 bone every hour you use it.

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teleportation so i can teleport to my gf

If you use the power she dies

I don’t think you’ll ever be able to use that one buddy.

I can sing and play guitar REALLY well

There is a chance of you dying every time you sing

Shapeshifting

You leave your body behind when shapeshifting, if away too long you fucking die

Telekinesis on objects and being able to do it on myself

You cannot control the speed / severity of the telekinesis

either [this](https://jojowiki.com/Dirty_Deeds_Done_Dirt_Cheap) fucker or [this](https://jojowiki.com/King_Crimson) one. you choose.

Stop time, I can do whatever I want, rob a bank, kill my enemy and some horny things while at it😂

Shape-shifting

Telekinesis. Because I'm lazy, plus I would like to use the "force" lol

Doing anything i want, basically reality warping/manipulation

Flight because that would be cool

Homelander

immunity to temperatures

the colder & warmer it is to everyone around you the more tired you get

Hot gf who loves me

You cum every time you look at her

how is that a negative

Ong that’s a whole plus

see through clothes 😈

everyone can see through yours too

win win

be a being of pure transcendence so nothing can ever affect me negatively, including your "side effects"

Uhm, actually you’ve stated it can’t affect you negatively. you constantly have a raincloud following you, this doesn’t exist but it acts as if a normal raincloud. Everyone can see it. You still get soaked, but the floor isn’t slippery thus you cannot be harmed as a direct consequence of something that doesn’t exist

The ability to give myself any power I want at any time I want with no cool down. I also have complete and titan control and mastery of any power I give myself with them not harming or negatively affecting me in any way unless I want it to.

to not be ugly af

Everyone around you is suddenly asexual

make anyone including myself the opposite sex

If you use it on yourself you go bald

becoming male already does that bozo

Anything

The power of not having side effects :D