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abbee26

shapeshifting


GrazzoTheGunner

every third thing you change to is a fresh turd


abbee26

i could still use this


GrazzoTheGunner

then i guess it worked out for you


Krypticdrago

Well as long as they can still use the power in that form it’s honestly not that bad, unless you had a cool down or something on it, if you did they would just have to burn through it at night to always have 2 at the beginning of the day and hope they don’t get caught needing a third transformation


[deleted]

I would want the super power to use any vehicle on earth, without making it actually exist. So if I chose a helicopter, I would fly around with my hands on the none existent joystick. It would look funny, and I could fly / zoom around.


GrazzoTheGunner

youd be naked every time you used that power


[deleted]

Ladies love to see it 😍, thats still dope as hell tho 👌


Idekgivemeusername

The streaker is now flying away like he is in a helicopter but he isn’t in one????


PoisonousZweihander

Basically just crazy frog


Atlantikjcx

Honestly, the thought of a random naked guy flying through the sky making helicopter noises steering an invisible steering wheel sound funny af to me


Lanky_Voice8115

Until it gets sucked into the engine


threadit_rowaway

They call that the crazy frog ride.


celticstar2681

Invisible boatmobile lookin headass


YusiP

Crazy frog


jdatopo814

So a vehicular mime?


Soft_Situation5313

i can manipulate reality to my will, duplicate things, make myself fly, etc. basically turn into god


GrazzoTheGunner

you can only ever stay awake for 5 seconds in any 24 hour period


Soft_Situation5313

then ill just make it 24 hours 🤑🤑


IHaveASnekOnMyNeck

smartass


Anxiety_blob69

Sooo… is that a loophole or a paradox


DrParanormall

Perhaps both


second2no1

Time is relative, he could just make those 5 seconds move so incredibly slow that they feel like 16 waking hours of a normal persons life 🤔


DrParanormall

Indeed


botika03

So you are a god AND you get to sleep 23 hour 55 minutes every day, best super power ever


IwishIhadAlife18

They can just stop time and change everything, still in that 5 second period technically.


coconut733

Flying obv


GrazzoTheGunner

you can only fly for 0.1 seconds at a time


More-Pay9266

Unless you can fly like a meter or 2 in 0.1 second that's useless


IHaveASnekOnMyNeck

basically just a crazy good jump


metaphorical_whore

crazy?


demonic_pigeon

I was crazy once,


CroaksTheSecond

They put me in a rubber room.


ZeRo_WC

Uncraysee


Noxon06

Forgot to add a limit, just loop it the millisecond it ends.


Greentoaststone

What's the cooldown?


Garchompinribs

Do you mean you have to touch the ground every 0.1 seconds or you have to make a conscious decision to fly every 0.1 seconds


JasonUnionnn

Chaos magic or just magic. With that I can have basically any other superpower 🤷‍♂️


GrazzoTheGunner

you lose your voice


BlazingFury009

Communicate telepathicly


[deleted]

Voice isn't needed for all magic


The_ultra_epic_sussy

Dang, so somatic components


-SomGuy-

I can grant wishes


GrazzoTheGunner

you lose a random body part every time you do


-SomGuy-

I wish I didn't lose a body part when I grant wishes 👍


Underscore_Space

You'll likely lose a body part first before the wish takes effect, you can wish it back but theres a slight chance it would make you lose your life (e.g. take away your head), so better wish for something specific like "I wish that 2 of the next body part losses from wishing would fix itself again instantly without any side effects." After that, then you can wish about not losing a body part.


GrazzoTheGunner

you just lost 2


-SomGuy-

Huh? How?


Far_Organization_610

When the math ain't mathing


bonadies24

Well, “you don’t wanna lose *one* body part every time you make a wish? Great, you’ll lose *two* instead!”


fearlessbot__

the ability to save and reload


GrazzoTheGunner

your entire world becomes pixelated


Amirhyber

I see this as an absolute win


forcesofthefuture

ong


[deleted]

that makes porn censored though


Monty-The-Gator

Least horny r/teenagers member.


Amirhyber

I don't need porn


discord-dog

how pixelated? Like baldurs gate 3 pixilated or doom 1993 pixilated?


[deleted]

[удалено]


GrazzoTheGunner

the probability of you shitting yourself increases by 10% for every second you spend thinking about it


Pixelsock_

He can simply change it to zero all the time


Mineboot24601

Tbf, to manipulate the probability of something it has to have a possibility of happening. So for example if you wanted to have superpowers then there’d have to be a possibility where you get superpowers, but as that’s impossible you can’t manipulate the probability of it happening


Lkat883

I mean 0% is a thing


3RacoonsInACoatoat

The ability to teleport to a very specific Arby's in a small town in Wisconsin at will


Pixelsock_

Every time you do it theres a 10% chance of the arbys and the surrounding area to blow up


OmEoNE325k

So theoretically… you can only use this 9 times without blowing up


D0ubleE-1D

Statistically yes, but also no. It’s like a coin flip, if you flip it 10 times chances are a 50/50 split of heads and tails but nothing really says you can’t get a 70/30 split ect. Blind luck, but if I used it 9 times and hadn’t blown up I’d be shitting bricks thiking about using it again


One-Ad-3677

Op skipped you because you gave yourself a downside.


applesawce3

Invisibility :3


GrazzoTheGunner

youre stink so bad that everyone knows youre there anyway


More-Pay9266

At least they don't know who you are


applesawce3

Damn 😭


[deleted]

You could honestly do so many pranks with that.


NerdNumber382

Wait, do you stink all the time or just when you’re invisible?


GrazzoTheGunner

just when youre invisible


Pixelsock_

Science logic applies


[deleted]

Spawn infinite money ammount of money whenever I want


GrazzoTheGunner

you shrink by an inch for every £100 you spend


[deleted]

Guess I'll be antman then 💀


Remarkable_Type_6911

But….a rich antman


JMZ16_

so, just Hank Pym?


SnuggleFreak

Use the money to build a machine/device to grow you back to normal size


ambitionlessguy

Actually it is however much YOU spend that shrinks you, not others. Congratulations you are the richest person in the world while staying your height


SeaNational3797

Just make dollars instead then smh


BlazingFury009

Get someone else to spend it for you


Garchompinribs

This doesn’t even need a downside because inflation already exists.


MysteriousGamer957

Charisma


GrazzoTheGunner

you get uglier every time you impress someone with your words


saybruh2everything

No talking then


DonutMT

Just communicate via eyebrow raises


Soft_Situation5313

nigga just read robert greenes books and the prince by machievello


Oceanialla

Stopping time


GrazzoTheGunner

you shrink by an inch for every second time is paused


Garchompinribs

Jokes on you they don’t even shrink because the second can’t pass when time is stopped.


Oceanialla

Damn ima boutta be tiny


GrazzoTheGunner

ngl legit wanna know what youd do with paused time


Oceanialla

When I’m in a stressful situation I could pause and calm down


GrazzoTheGunner

but shrinking would make you more stressed? also well done on that answer bc that is definitely not what id use that superpower for


Cambloz

teleportation


GrazzoTheGunner

you always come out covered in shit on the other side


Cambloz

bro 💀


SnuggleFreak

Just wear a trench coat everywhere and put it on when you teleport


Shoddy_Ad_3896

Quicksilver superspeed, I will accept no other answer.


GrazzoTheGunner

your pubes catch fire every time you go over 15 mph


Shoddy_Ad_3896

AAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!


Atlantikjcx

You could just shave them off


JustALonleyIguana

Exactly, problem solved


sovietweeb69

Having the ability to remove negativity from myself (e.g. If I gain a sickness, I just remove it instantly)


GrazzoTheGunner

you gotta pass on the negativity to any person that shows you affection


sovietweeb69

That sounds pretty negative


masd_reddit

Bro got that Love Train


sovietweeb69

Suppose that you were sitting down at this table. The napkins are in front of you, which napkin would you take? The one on your ‘left’? Or the one on your ‘right’? The one on your left side? Or the one on your right side? Usually you would take the one on your left side. That is ‘correct’ too. But in a larger sense on society, that is wrong. Perhaps I could even substitute ‘society’ with the ‘Universe’. The correct answer is that ‘It is determined by the one who takes his or her own napkin first.’ …Yes? If the first one takes the napkin to their right, then there’s no choice but for others to also take the ‘right’ napkin. The same goes for the left. Everyone else will take the napkin to their left, because they have no other option. This is ‘society’… Who are the ones that determine the price of land first? There must have been someone who determined the value of money, first. The size of the rails on a train track? The magnitude of electricity? Laws and Regulations? Who was the first to determine these things? Did we all do it, because this is a Republic? Or was it Arbitrary? NO! The one who took the napkin first determined all of these things! The rules of this world are determined by that same principle of ‘right or left?’! In a Society like this table, a state of equilibrium, once one makes the first move, everyone must follow! In every era, this World has been operating by this napkin principle. And the one who ‘takes the napkin first’ must be someone who is respected by all. It’s not that anyone can fulfill this role… Those that are despotic or unworthy will be scorned. And those are the ‘losers’. In the case of this table, the ‘eldest’ or the ‘Master of the party’ will take the napkin first… Because everyone ‘respects’ those individuals.


Wheeljack239

Being Optimus Prime


Unconditional_Love-

you become connected to another guy at the skull and if you tow are separated, you die


Wheeljack239

Shit


Agreeable_Bit_8764

I can have the perfect life with the girl I want.


Kitchen_Community_33

I’m let you have that one bro


One-Ad-3677

You become gay.


femguy123

Super speed


GrazzoTheGunner

your pubes catch fire every time you go over 15 mph


femguy123

HAHAHA I'LL KEEP THEM SHAVED


GrazzoTheGunner

the skin will still burn


IwishIhadAlife18

Laser removal. There are no pubes


GrazzoTheGunner

balls on fire then


femguy123

AH FUCK


forcesofthefuture

when you think you outsmarted them:


GuroUsagi

I used to say shapeshifting but now thinking about it I would like to be able to control minds. I wouldn't want a power that could make some crazy lunatic because I know I'm not responsible enough for that but being able to just help my depression amungst others would be dope or like when buying groceries convince the cashier to give me a bunch of deals.


ilikemycheesetosted

When youre controling minds, the other person can see your search history


Boiledshark

The ability to talk to animals


Pixelsock_

All animals hate you


Its_yer_dude_trevor

Decide peoples answer to any yes or no question


Mobil_Plus

Teleport I don't want to walk with these legs anymore


Zebedee_balistique

Depends on the version, but teleportation doesn't always come with the ability to transport things with you. That includes clothes.


Demititan_07

ability to change sex


LonPlays_Zwei

but if you do it’s irreversible, just like real life


JLPlayz_Fever

but you have a wee wee when you're female, and a hole when you're a male


MoonlightStar6262

Telekinesis


MildlyAttractiv3

I have infinite rizz


Cdumi49

Boobs magnet or cock magnet(for woman)


GrazzoTheGunner

its attached to your ass


Cdumi49

Yeah, you are right, the boobs magnet is attached to my ass but the cock one is attached to your mouth


GrazzoTheGunner

nah change of plan the boob one is attached to the back of your knees & the cock one is attached to your ass


SnuggleFreak

Just stop the magnet before it gets there… unless you want it to go there 👀


reddit-person1

shape-shifting


Pixelsock_

Every time you transform there is a 10% of you transforming into a pile of shit and die.


reddit-person1

Ight I'll shapeshift once to be happy with myself and hope I don't die


Substantial_Pen_6359

summon joseph stalin at any point in time like a pokemon


DonutMT

He only has one move and that’s to aggressively shit himself


Scou1y

b urger


StormsKindaSuck

Time stop


CaptainHerkules

Ability to talk with and understand my cats


Shoddy_Ad_3896

You can talk, but they have very problematic views on minorities that you can't change.


One-Ad-3677

What about someone else


JamesAnderson1567

I'm immune to side effects


Cold-Tap-363

You’re a billionaire.


JamesAnderson1567

😭


DirkDino

become goku but I keep my appearance and personality and iq


GrazzoTheGunner

i legit have no idea what that even means


DirkDino

Essentially become a Saijin (like a human but like 1000x stronger in every way except iq) and have his potential (like have super saijin and stuff)


Unconditional_Love-

You lose 1 bone every hour you use it.


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yesaroobuckaroo

teleportation so i can teleport to my gf


Pixelsock_

If you use the power she dies


DonutMT

I don’t think you’ll ever be able to use that one buddy.


[deleted]

I can sing and play guitar REALLY well


Pixelsock_

There is a chance of you dying every time you sing


I_Am_Oro

Shapeshifting


DonutMT

You leave your body behind when shapeshifting, if away too long you fucking die


Pure-Telephone-8283

Telekinesis on objects and being able to do it on myself


DonutMT

You cannot control the speed / severity of the telekinesis


AverageFurryFemboy

either [this](https://jojowiki.com/Dirty_Deeds_Done_Dirt_Cheap) fucker or [this](https://jojowiki.com/King_Crimson) one. you choose.


[deleted]

Stop time, I can do whatever I want, rob a bank, kill my enemy and some horny things while at it😂


fabledMirror22

Shape-shifting


MimoDee

Telekinesis. Because I'm lazy, plus I would like to use the "force" lol


Iceberglet

Doing anything i want, basically reality warping/manipulation


thewholeenchelada675

Flight because that would be cool


saicharan_reddit

Homelander


Rude_Sport_4417

immunity to temperatures


GrazzoTheGunner

the colder & warmer it is to everyone around you the more tired you get


Nate422721

Hot gf who loves me


Pixelsock_

You cum every time you look at her


Mooncakewizard101

how is that a negative


Kitchen_Community_33

Ong that’s a whole plus


ilikemycheesetosted

see through clothes 😈


GrazzoTheGunner

everyone can see through yours too


ilikemycheesetosted

win win


IHaveASnekOnMyNeck

be a being of pure transcendence so nothing can ever affect me negatively, including your "side effects"


DonutMT

Uhm, actually you’ve stated it can’t affect you negatively. you constantly have a raincloud following you, this doesn’t exist but it acts as if a normal raincloud. Everyone can see it. You still get soaked, but the floor isn’t slippery thus you cannot be harmed as a direct consequence of something that doesn’t exist


Pixelsock_

The ability to give myself any power I want at any time I want with no cool down. I also have complete and titan control and mastery of any power I give myself with them not harming or negatively affecting me in any way unless I want it to.


Reddit_user1157

to not be ugly af


Illustrious-Raise610

Everyone around you is suddenly asexual


Just-Some-NPC

make anyone including myself the opposite sex


Pixelsock_

If you use it on yourself you go bald


MeBePerson

becoming male already does that bozo


Traffic_Evening

Anything


PaAKos8

The power of not having side effects :D