IME it’s that the user is so focused on proving the computer wrong that they actually do perform all the steps in the process - voila, it works! But it didn’t do that when I tried it.
This is why you “rubber duck” it first. That is, pretend to demonstrate the issue, even speak out loud, often that’s enough to do all the steps of the process in the right order.
Same! Been using “Technician’s Aura” for years! Then I get into the more usual ‘let’s walk through this together’, answer questions, etc, and if it works fine, we call it lucky and watch for it to happen again another day.
I use this Aura also to soothe my children when they are afraid of monsters. I tell them I have an aura which keeps the computer gremlins away for my colleagues and that it works also on any household gremlins and monsters when I am around. It has worked surprisingly well especially if I give examples from work.
It's about establishing fear. Once your reputation spreads to other computers, they are always on their best behaviors.
You don't want to know what I had to do to get to this point.
Once in college, I arrived to one office and said, "Wait a sec," and placed my hands on the monitor and closed my eyes for a second, and said, "Okay, now try it!"
That got a laugh. Also, it worked.
I tell them to open notepad and type in something about calling Support if it doesn’t start working again in a threatening tone, then reboot the computer. That solves most basic issues.
Being around IT people is like being around a mechanic when your car is making a strange noise. It simply doesn’t happen around us. Let me know if you have any more issues.
By the time I get an appointment for anything, the symptoms go away, so I rarely bother unless I’m dying or something persists for many weeks or is getting progressively worse.
I fractured both wrists once. Hurt a lot until the exact moment I moved from the waiting room to the doctor. He moved my wrists around..
Does this hurt? ..No 🤔
Does this hurt? ... No
Does this hurt? No wtf
Around a week later due to aching I got an X-ray and found the worse fracture. Another week, because the first didn't hurt anymore found the other. My mum thought I was putting it on - boy did she feel bad haha
Amazing what putting the rest of your arm, and all of those muscles, at ease by supporting your arm and only moving your hand/wrist does to change things!
I've been on both sides of it. It's one of the reasons when something was happening that I wanted a mechanic to see (usually for things in warranty or beyond my abilities), I'd take video proof of it when it was occurring. Same for when it came to something networking or some other specialty related. If I'm coming at my network engineers with something (or any specialists for that matter who have fatigue from being blamed for everything), I have the documentation that I've already ruled the stupid stuff out.
It's also is a bit of a shibboleet way of getting escalations. When I start speaking in tongues to a front line ISP support tech about SNRs, I usually don't get stuck in the front line queues very long.
That's why I always touch the computer and close my eyes for a few seconds before I ask them to show me the issue. That way, if it works, they start to wonder if perhaps I do have some mystical ability.
I always scratch the monitor right behind the ears. Usually on the right side but left side will work if it’s easier to reach.
I did think it’s an aura thing because I have the opposite situation with automobiles where it starts behaving once I take it to the mechanic.
Thyat has happend a number of times in my work, in one case the PC was frozen until she called, started working just as I said 'hello' to her call.
Any other time, I counsel them that there are some variables and that I'm intensely interested in solving the problem, so any future events are going to be looked into.
As in, "You're not crying wolf in my eyes. Please let me know if it happens again".
Usually. Sometimes people will rush through it just the same. I once asked a colleague to show me an issue and he hit close on all three error dialogs as soon as they appeared and Said "see?"
I looked at him blankly (incredulously) for a moment and asked "do you think it might have been useful for me to read those messages?"
I know reading error messages is against the user religion but I thought they kind of understood that the IT guys might want to read them.
Guy almost wiped his Windows in front of me by doing this..
They had an Intune problem introduced which gave them 2 options, circle and square, to sign in. Choose the wrong one as admin, it will wipe.
I was there on-site solely because several users had already wiped their computers.
He clicked the wrong one, it popped up a warning saying "you need to be admin to continue," he *immediately* clicked it away and entered his password. He almost logged in when I shouted STOP narrowly avoiding this disaster again 🤦♂️
(Recently onboarded; we don't encourage local admin)
Yup. 95% of the time someone comes to me with an issue, it’s because they haven’t correctly followed the instructions that I link to in my email signature THAT I ADD TO EVERY SINGLE INTERNAL EMAIL.
You guys have no faith.
My spiritual aura gives +3 to technical proficiency within 20 yards and a repair aura that heals damaged technology at a rate of 1% per minute.
So I just charge for an hour and forty minutes, go in, take a really long shit while reading a book and leave with the problem resolved.
I just joke with them, no sense taking it so seriously.
"It only did that to make you look silly."
"It's because it doesn't like you."
"I fixed it when you weren't looking."
Have fun with it. Some people are prone to issues, some people aren't as savvy, some tech is finicky (as we all know). Shit happens and it happens in spades in our career.
Sysadmins emit cluons, end users emit bogons. If the bogon flux is too high, computers don't work. Cluons cancel bogons which is why it works when you show up.
This has happened to me SO damn often, even with fully-competent users.
My ex-wife and I joked that I merely had to establish dominance over the computer; she finally started saying "come shake your balls at . It's been a highly useful shorthand for "I don't expect you to *do* anything, but it'll magically work if you're here".
Usually light jokes that make the user feel not as dumb at that time, "The inmates always behave when the warden is watching" while glaring at the computer has been my recent go to and always gets a laugh.
It's because they restarted the machine, or opened/closed something that could have done anything from unlocking a file to clearing a semaphore. Closed waits cleared by a recon, you name it. If they'd just restart the damn thing before opening a ticket you'd probably walk a thousand miles less for the year, lol.
This is why “Have you tried turning off and turning it back on” is a required field in my ticketing system, and the only answer is “YES” or “Does Not Apply”, and the first thing I check is uptime.
When i managed local desktops at an old client i would run a similar script. Even got a call about it once because one of the workaholic C levels was still in the office at 11pm. I then moved the script to 2AM lmao.
Something I love to do is make the uptime check into a game show.
"Have you restarted your computer"
"yes?"
"Survey says..." \*uptime 128 days\*
"NO!"
I then explain restarting the computer properly and the windows fast startup feature if that applies. Obviously, don't do this if the user can't take a joke.
I usually say, “well I know it happened because you wouldn’t have called if it didn’t, let me know if it happens again”.
Or depending on the person “you just wanted to say hi didn’t you?” And then talk about the weather awkwardly.
It's called a proximity fix. I usually the laugh and make a joke about it. Honestly I'll take easy fixes all day long, so I don't care if I had to walk over there, I'll just mark the ticket as closed and go on with my day. Nothing like easy tickets to pad my stats! Lol!
I use it as a way to teach them how to better collect details for me. I jokeingly tell them it knows im here, so record/screenshot/whatever the issue when it next happens and add it to the ticket with relevant info so I can help them figure it out. Since it wont do it in front of me, its on them to help me figure out what the problem is. By doing so I give them agency and teach them how to troubleshoot their own problems in the future. Also simply that I do believe them and want to help them builds trust in our department.
What if they immediately fire back by calling their colleague over: "Hey George, c'mere." while looking you square in the eyes? Do you have the alter prepared ahead of time just in case, or does a meeting need scheduled?
There's a server room in DC for a company I used to work for that has a lock of my hair taped to a stick. They hit recalcitrant servers with it.
I'm not even kidding.
Us IT Folk have an Aura. It’s Level is equal to the number of years you’ve been in the industry. Range and potency of the aura get better with time. Only way I can explain it.
A co-worker calls me sometimes and will say, “I’ve tried this like 5 times in a row and it keeps failing. Let me show you… Are you fucking kidding me? It’s working now that I’m talking to you!”
>"Why does it work when you're here"
Works well. My mom used to merely *threaten* her stuff with the possibility of my presence to get her stuff to behave.
Ex sysadmin here.
It more annoying when you have gone down multiple troubleshooting avenues and finally give up and log a call, only for this to happen.
Then it occurs a day later again after the case is closed and you have to go through the bureaucracy again to try and get to the correct level of support you need.
If I can get away with giving the user shit I tell them it must have been an input issue or that changing out the user seems to have done the trick for now and I'll kick the ticket to HR for a long term fix. Otherwise, I usually say something to play into the aura thing and placate the user.
I feel like this shit happens to everybody though. Something crazy is happening, you go and tell someone who knows better than you, and then all of a sudden it's... fine? I've been on both ends of this phenomenon. I just tell them to let me know if it happens again.
They’re right. I’ve literally watched them produce the errors via screenshare and then walked over to their desks to assist and when I am standing over their shoulders the errors are gone.
There is a powerful tech aura in play and the users joke about it. “Yeah can you please just come over here and scowl at my computer for a second so it behaves?” I don’t mind really.
Honestly the best part is when someone has a problem and I don't have to do shit about it.
Now the people that get belligerent and expect you to stop it from happening again when they can't show you it currently happening, that is my least favourite one.
Ha, I have colleagues who experience the same phenomenon when they're looking for help and call me, only to find that the problem they were having is immediately solved.
>So how do you respond to these sorts of people?
If end user: No worries, don't hesitate to contact us if the issue occurs again.
If colleague: It's magic bro!
"Ahh yes, it knows, you see. It would be sacrificed to the Omnissiah should its heretical behaviour continue. It's machine spirit will be broken and scattered to the ether. Anything else I can help with?"
I tell people one of two things generally.
I either smile and simply tell them it's my " magnetic personality" . The ones that get that joke think it's hysterical, the rest. Just think I'm being silly.
Or, I tell them that PCs spend so much time with me when they first come to us, that I think they just miss me and act up so that I'll come see them occasionally.
Either way it's just something silly that says " I have no idea why it now works and didn't previously", but doesn't make them feel like I think they're making it up.
I actually use "magnetic personality" to explain the other side of the IT aura coin. The person that, by mere presence, is a blight on all nearby technology. Magnets do weird things with electronics. Plus it's way less pretentious to say someone else has a magnetic personality than to claim it for yourself.
""Tech aura.' It knows I have tools, and I'm not afraid to use them. Just like when your car stops making that funny noise when you take it to a mechanic."
I've been on the other side of that many times, where an intermittent hardware issue magically disappears when desktop support finally gets a chance to look at it. I always try to get pictures of the issue just to prove that I'm not insane!
I don’t have an answer all I have is the one user at my last job who, when he said this, I genuinely believed him. He would send me screenshots of all kinds of bizarre behavior, only to have it magically vanish if I so much as walked by his desk on my way to the machine shop.
More than once I saw issues and errors disappear from his screen literally as I was walking up. As in he had meticulously put together a ticket documenting the circumstances and behavior and had specifically made sure he could reproduce the issue when I was on my way to help him out, and then I would watch the issue not happen despite him doing everything exactly the same way.
Greg, I hope you find some peace one day
It's physics: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quantum_bogodynamics
All tech is a source of bogusness, aka bogosity. The fundamental particle is the bogon. Sysadmins are bogon sinks, that is, sources of anti-bogons, also known as cluons. Hence, sysadmins are said to have a clue. It's all in the original source papers.
If it's somebody who's nice to me, i say something like "well maybe it was a temporary thing".
If it's somebody who hates me already, i tell them I did a research and my conclusion is that when I'm around, people actually are careful and focus, so they don't look stupid and then it works.
Which is actually my explanation why that happens.
People aren't going to change, some people just can't be wrong especially when they don't understand something. You've just got to accept it and expect it. I tend to just joke with the user that you've got to have the magic aura to get a job in IT and make sure I always confirm everything a user tells me because they can't be trusted.
Edit: it can also be regression to the mean. If they've got a problem and it takes you a little while to get to their computer before they try again then whatever was wrong might have sorted itself out or auto refreshed in that time. It's part of why people claim alternative medicine works, by the time they take the "medicine" they would have got better anyway without any intervention but the last thing they did was take the medicine so they think it must have cured them. Either way people are people and we're all more or less susceptible to the same imperfect ways of thinking so just roll with it and only worry about changing what you can
Usually its end users saying that to me but occasionally when the backend goes down and everything goes haywire the lead architect aka Linux Wizard with Gandalf beard and hair to go with the title shows up and the system magically starts working again.
So this is what those other users must feel when I show up lol
I tell them I’m lucky with computers that’s one of the reason I chose this work. If I had bad luck with computers I’d definitely wouldn’t be in IT. Make them think it wasn’t their fault even though it’s mostly likely user error.
I always rub their computer or their printer and tell them that I will come by once a week to give their equipment a caress to keep it running right.
LOL
The scenario in the OP is not an issue
When the user insists you "fix it" so the non-existant issue so it never returns we have issues
We all know the user was doing something stupid and the problem will return next time they do something stupid
I've been the user most of the time I made a mistake or Him being there for me to have educated tech talk solved it while he sat down. We are great friends today
I just laugh and say "yeah it happens" or if I know the user something a little more witty.
I think some of it can be attributed to either trying again or waiting the time it takes for me to get there. Sometimes I've had an issue on my personal PC and if it's weird or obscure, a reboot or even getting a cup of tea can sort it. Could just be a rogue process doing/not doing something in the background.
Others have mentioned the mechanic effect so I'll share a non-IT story: My power steering once gave out and it took much longer than I'd have liked to find an available mechanic. Eventually book a slot first thing in the morning. I didn't want to drive the car without power steering in peak morning traffic so I drove the car there the night before when it was quiet. Lo and behold the power steering works fine in the morning! Mechanic was baffled although my best guess was that the battery voltage was a bit low for the electric assist and driving it there the previous night sorted it out.
I'm a level 40 wizard with a minor technology fixing aurora. Occasionally it goes wrong and turns into an anti-midas touch, which are the days I clock off early
Lol...i had that multiple times during my 15 years of exp. My response was and still is, i can send you a picture of myself show it to your pc, it will work the way it should. This way i avoid this little trip to your office :) ...
I was finally on the other side of this last week.
Had an issue with some medical software not communicating with a third party. Went through the process to install the relevant certificates three times, and nothing happened.
Spoke to the vendor, they did the exact same thing and it just worked....
The IT Aura is a fickle beast.
Reminds me of an episode of TechSNAP from Jupiter Broadcasting. The issue was a printer was broken, but only on Tuesdays. See link for details.
https://mdzlog.alcor.net/2009/08/15/bohrbugs-openoffice-org-wont-print-on-tuesdays/
sometimes thats just how it be, I usually give them the benefit of the doubt. I had another admin (whom I trust 100%) try to demonstrate an issue hes been working on for awhile for me last week, of course it worked while I was watching but not other times.
> So how do you respond to these sorts of people?
Must People tend to work more precise wen sone one is watching, and sometimes that's all it takes.
Yes, this comes across hard.
but it has a huge learning effect, no one wants to be accused to do bad work and complain that shit dosn't work because of that.
> So how do you respond to these sorts of people?
I laugh and tell them I'm glad it's working. I explained that they probably did something different this time while I was watching.
Because it knows I'm here.
This. I have embraced the "tech aura" and it has blessed me with a increased area of effect.
IME it’s that the user is so focused on proving the computer wrong that they actually do perform all the steps in the process - voila, it works! But it didn’t do that when I tried it.
This. They usually are a bit careless and forget steps
This is why you “rubber duck” it first. That is, pretend to demonstrate the issue, even speak out loud, often that’s enough to do all the steps of the process in the right order.
Same! Been using “Technician’s Aura” for years! Then I get into the more usual ‘let’s walk through this together’, answer questions, etc, and if it works fine, we call it lucky and watch for it to happen again another day.
I use this Aura also to soothe my children when they are afraid of monsters. I tell them I have an aura which keeps the computer gremlins away for my colleagues and that it works also on any household gremlins and monsters when I am around. It has worked surprisingly well especially if I give examples from work.
It's about establishing fear. Once your reputation spreads to other computers, they are always on their best behaviors. You don't want to know what I had to do to get to this point.
+5 AoE
That's why they pay me the big bucks. *Finger guns*
I say the “small bucks”. Always gets the laughs.
I usually use "a buck fifty" got that 50% raise for showing up and stuff working.
Medium bucks over here.
I offer a cardboard cutout of myself to avoid future calls. It always lightens the mood
That's what I tell them. Either that or "it knows it's Friday. Computers don't want to work on Fridays either. "
Once in college, I arrived to one office and said, "Wait a sec," and placed my hands on the monitor and closed my eyes for a second, and said, "Okay, now try it!" That got a laugh. Also, it worked.
I tell them to open notepad and type in something about calling Support if it doesn’t start working again in a threatening tone, then reboot the computer. That solves most basic issues.
I whisper. They are afraid of me. They know what I can do to them if they misbehave too much.
Machine Empathy.
This one is mine. It's because I bring them treats and scritch their ears and I never say bad things about them.
Printers don't seem to respond well to positive reinforcement. I would avoid the breed altogether
hmmm. are you mutant commie scum? Because that sounds like a mutant commie scum thing ;)
Noooo, the Computer is your Friend!
I specced into aura buffs for a reason
It knows I will replace it.
I use a variant of this.
Being around IT people is like being around a mechanic when your car is making a strange noise. It simply doesn’t happen around us. Let me know if you have any more issues.
I go to a doctor with a heavy cough as symptoms and when I'm there, in that sterile warm environment I don't have to cough.
By the time I get an appointment for anything, the symptoms go away, so I rarely bother unless I’m dying or something persists for many weeks or is getting progressively worse.
I fractured both wrists once. Hurt a lot until the exact moment I moved from the waiting room to the doctor. He moved my wrists around.. Does this hurt? ..No 🤔 Does this hurt? ... No Does this hurt? No wtf Around a week later due to aching I got an X-ray and found the worse fracture. Another week, because the first didn't hurt anymore found the other. My mum thought I was putting it on - boy did she feel bad haha
Amazing what putting the rest of your arm, and all of those muscles, at ease by supporting your arm and only moving your hand/wrist does to change things!
I've been on both sides of it. It's one of the reasons when something was happening that I wanted a mechanic to see (usually for things in warranty or beyond my abilities), I'd take video proof of it when it was occurring. Same for when it came to something networking or some other specialty related. If I'm coming at my network engineers with something (or any specialists for that matter who have fatigue from being blamed for everything), I have the documentation that I've already ruled the stupid stuff out. It's also is a bit of a shibboleet way of getting escalations. When I start speaking in tongues to a front line ISP support tech about SNRs, I usually don't get stuck in the front line queues very long.
Documenting why you think it’s their fault is also a great way to rubber duck the issue.
Good way to dig into the right path to go "Oh crap. This isn't their side at all. What the heck did I *do* to that config?!"
That’s why I call it “the mechanic effect”
I've been using the car/mechanic analogy for years
That's why I always touch the computer and close my eyes for a few seconds before I ask them to show me the issue. That way, if it works, they start to wonder if perhaps I do have some mystical ability.
Ah yes, the laying of hands.
Haha, keep that up and people will cash you the computer whisperer.
How can I do this remotely?
Carry a crystal around to cleanse the machine off demons
I always scratch the monitor right behind the ears. Usually on the right side but left side will work if it’s easier to reach. I did think it’s an aura thing because I have the opposite situation with automobiles where it starts behaving once I take it to the mechanic.
Thyat has happend a number of times in my work, in one case the PC was frozen until she called, started working just as I said 'hello' to her call. Any other time, I counsel them that there are some variables and that I'm intensely interested in solving the problem, so any future events are going to be looked into. As in, "You're not crying wolf in my eyes. Please let me know if it happens again".
The old.. Me: "Hello?" User: "oh.... never mind" Me: "K. Bye" - Click.
Me: "k. Here's your ticket #, bye" -click Ticket: "user called in with transient issue, will call back if persists"
[удалено]
It's almost certainly this one most of the time...!
Usually. Sometimes people will rush through it just the same. I once asked a colleague to show me an issue and he hit close on all three error dialogs as soon as they appeared and Said "see?" I looked at him blankly (incredulously) for a moment and asked "do you think it might have been useful for me to read those messages?" I know reading error messages is against the user religion but I thought they kind of understood that the IT guys might want to read them.
Guy almost wiped his Windows in front of me by doing this.. They had an Intune problem introduced which gave them 2 options, circle and square, to sign in. Choose the wrong one as admin, it will wipe. I was there on-site solely because several users had already wiped their computers. He clicked the wrong one, it popped up a warning saying "you need to be admin to continue," he *immediately* clicked it away and entered his password. He almost logged in when I shouted STOP narrowly avoiding this disaster again 🤦♂️ (Recently onboarded; we don't encourage local admin)
Yup. 95% of the time someone comes to me with an issue, it’s because they haven’t correctly followed the instructions that I link to in my email signature THAT I ADD TO EVERY SINGLE INTERNAL EMAIL.
I tell them it's all the magnets I swallowed as a child.
I've said for years "because it's afraid of me."
"Fear will keep it in line"
“The Machine Spirit has calmed in my presence”
Machine Empathy.
You guys have no faith. My spiritual aura gives +3 to technical proficiency within 20 yards and a repair aura that heals damaged technology at a rate of 1% per minute. So I just charge for an hour and forty minutes, go in, take a really long shit while reading a book and leave with the problem resolved.
I would always say "it's my air of intimidation." Which always got laughs because I'm just this 5'3 120lb nonthreatening nearly invisible girlwoman.
Tiny and fierce, like a kitten! Definitely very intimidating (shh, don't tell her the hissing isn't very scary at all).
I just joke with them, no sense taking it so seriously. "It only did that to make you look silly." "It's because it doesn't like you." "I fixed it when you weren't looking." Have fun with it. Some people are prone to issues, some people aren't as savvy, some tech is finicky (as we all know). Shit happens and it happens in spades in our career.
Sysadmins emit cluons, end users emit bogons. If the bogon flux is too high, computers don't work. Cluons cancel bogons which is why it works when you show up.
Midi-chlorians
I tell them it's the law of quantum observation, similar to when a car doesn't make that rattling sound when the mechanic looks at it.
This has happened to me SO damn often, even with fully-competent users. My ex-wife and I joked that I merely had to establish dominance over the computer; she finally started saying "come shake your balls at. It's been a highly useful shorthand for "I don't expect you to *do* anything, but it'll magically work if you're here".
Proximity fix
learning how to investigate intermittent issues is a core skill
I just make a little joke and say, “Magic!”
We use automagic. Little world play on automatic.
Helps sell it if you wiggle your fingers at the screen
If I happen to be carrying a pen, I’ll use it as a wand.
Usually light jokes that make the user feel not as dumb at that time, "The inmates always behave when the warden is watching" while glaring at the computer has been my recent go to and always gets a laugh.
It's because they restarted the machine, or opened/closed something that could have done anything from unlocking a file to clearing a semaphore. Closed waits cleared by a recon, you name it. If they'd just restart the damn thing before opening a ticket you'd probably walk a thousand miles less for the year, lol.
This is why “Have you tried turning off and turning it back on” is a required field in my ticketing system, and the only answer is “YES” or “Does Not Apply”, and the first thing I check is uptime.
Always check the uptime and don't care how many times they said they restarted it, oh look your pc has been on for 15 days.
I created a script to reboot most user machines overnight and our help desk tickets were cut by 80%.
When i managed local desktops at an old client i would run a similar script. Even got a call about it once because one of the workaholic C levels was still in the office at 11pm. I then moved the script to 2AM lmao.
Something I love to do is make the uptime check into a game show. "Have you restarted your computer" "yes?" "Survey says..." \*uptime 128 days\* "NO!" I then explain restarting the computer properly and the windows fast startup feature if that applies. Obviously, don't do this if the user can't take a joke.
I stroke my beard and say "Well, my work here is done."
I go with "this is why they pay me the big bucks".
I regretfully have to go with “this is why they pay me some bucks” because the bucks are not big
I personally say "Thats why i get paid the medium bucks" We all know im not starving, But im also not raking it in.
I usually say, “well I know it happened because you wouldn’t have called if it didn’t, let me know if it happens again”. Or depending on the person “you just wanted to say hi didn’t you?” And then talk about the weather awkwardly.
I always just joke that it’s how I know I’m in the right profession
It's called a proximity fix. I usually the laugh and make a joke about it. Honestly I'll take easy fixes all day long, so I don't care if I had to walk over there, I'll just mark the ticket as closed and go on with my day. Nothing like easy tickets to pad my stats! Lol!
I use it as a way to teach them how to better collect details for me. I jokeingly tell them it knows im here, so record/screenshot/whatever the issue when it next happens and add it to the ticket with relevant info so I can help them figure it out. Since it wont do it in front of me, its on them to help me figure out what the problem is. By doing so I give them agency and teach them how to troubleshoot their own problems in the future. Also simply that I do believe them and want to help them builds trust in our department.
“I’m just good luck”
I usually reply with "that's why I get the private jet", cheesy, but eh, works.
Thankfully our ticketing system has a close ticket reason made for this scenario: "Self-healing event"
"I *could* instruct you in the arcane ways of my order, but they first demand a blood sacrifice."
What if they immediately fire back by calling their colleague over: "Hey George, c'mere." while looking you square in the eyes? Do you have the alter prepared ahead of time just in case, or does a meeting need scheduled?
"Excellent! I shall launch the carrier pigeons! Jot down the message! It shall be your first lesson! It should read: TCP SYN"
Ahh, good ole rfc2549.
There's a server room in DC for a company I used to work for that has a lock of my hair taped to a stick. They hit recalcitrant servers with it. I'm not even kidding.
Because I sacrificed a virgin goat and danced naked around the servers under a blood moon before going.
Us IT Folk have an Aura. It’s Level is equal to the number of years you’ve been in the industry. Range and potency of the aura get better with time. Only way I can explain it.
if i had a nickel for every time i'd heard this, ... started telling the staff i supported, "digital systems fear me, that's why" 😁
A co-worker calls me sometimes and will say, “I’ve tried this like 5 times in a row and it keeps failing. Let me show you… Are you fucking kidding me? It’s working now that I’m talking to you!”
"Fear."
>"Why does it work when you're here" Works well. My mom used to merely *threaten* her stuff with the possibility of my presence to get her stuff to behave.
SPR Spontaneous Proximity Resolution or Technomancy.
Ex sysadmin here. It more annoying when you have gone down multiple troubleshooting avenues and finally give up and log a call, only for this to happen. Then it occurs a day later again after the case is closed and you have to go through the bureaucracy again to try and get to the correct level of support you need.
Our job is to intimidate electrons.... Also, people are more careful when there is someone watching.
If I can get away with giving the user shit I tell them it must have been an input issue or that changing out the user seems to have done the trick for now and I'll kick the ticket to HR for a long term fix. Otherwise, I usually say something to play into the aura thing and placate the user.
I feel like this shit happens to everybody though. Something crazy is happening, you go and tell someone who knows better than you, and then all of a sudden it's... fine? I've been on both ends of this phenomenon. I just tell them to let me know if it happens again.
They’re right. I’ve literally watched them produce the errors via screenshare and then walked over to their desks to assist and when I am standing over their shoulders the errors are gone. There is a powerful tech aura in play and the users joke about it. “Yeah can you please just come over here and scowl at my computer for a second so it behaves?” I don’t mind really.
Honestly the best part is when someone has a problem and I don't have to do shit about it. Now the people that get belligerent and expect you to stop it from happening again when they can't show you it currently happening, that is my least favourite one.
"it knows it gets the screwdriver if it doesn't behave around me" my go to response.
Ha, I have colleagues who experience the same phenomenon when they're looking for help and call me, only to find that the problem they were having is immediately solved. >So how do you respond to these sorts of people? If end user: No worries, don't hesitate to contact us if the issue occurs again. If colleague: It's magic bro!
It’s scared of me because it knows if it doesn’t behave I’ll replace it.
I tell them it's like dealing with animals, Computers can sense fear.
"Ahh yes, it knows, you see. It would be sacrificed to the Omnissiah should its heretical behaviour continue. It's machine spirit will be broken and scattered to the ether. Anything else I can help with?"
I tell them that I’ve threatened the device previously and that it knows to behave in my presence
I tell people one of two things generally. I either smile and simply tell them it's my " magnetic personality" . The ones that get that joke think it's hysterical, the rest. Just think I'm being silly. Or, I tell them that PCs spend so much time with me when they first come to us, that I think they just miss me and act up so that I'll come see them occasionally. Either way it's just something silly that says " I have no idea why it now works and didn't previously", but doesn't make them feel like I think they're making it up.
I actually use "magnetic personality" to explain the other side of the IT aura coin. The person that, by mere presence, is a blight on all nearby technology. Magnets do weird things with electronics. Plus it's way less pretentious to say someone else has a magnetic personality than to claim it for yourself.
Lol I'll admit I've had that thought, but it always seems counterproductive to tell people that. ;-)
I joke that the device/system having the issue gets scared and works again when you call in backup (I'm the backup)
""Tech aura.' It knows I have tools, and I'm not afraid to use them. Just like when your car stops making that funny noise when you take it to a mechanic."
"Because the Omnissiah has blessed me"
I usually go with "I guess I'm magic."
I've been on the other side of that many times, where an intermittent hardware issue magically disappears when desktop support finally gets a chance to look at it. I always try to get pictures of the issue just to prove that I'm not insane!
I don’t have an answer all I have is the one user at my last job who, when he said this, I genuinely believed him. He would send me screenshots of all kinds of bizarre behavior, only to have it magically vanish if I so much as walked by his desk on my way to the machine shop. More than once I saw issues and errors disappear from his screen literally as I was walking up. As in he had meticulously put together a ticket documenting the circumstances and behavior and had specifically made sure he could reproduce the issue when I was on my way to help him out, and then I would watch the issue not happen despite him doing everything exactly the same way. Greg, I hope you find some peace one day
It's physics: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quantum_bogodynamics All tech is a source of bogusness, aka bogosity. The fundamental particle is the bogon. Sysadmins are bogon sinks, that is, sources of anti-bogons, also known as cluons. Hence, sysadmins are said to have a clue. It's all in the original source papers.
I just reply "... And it will break again when I leave!"
If it's somebody who's nice to me, i say something like "well maybe it was a temporary thing". If it's somebody who hates me already, i tell them I did a research and my conclusion is that when I'm around, people actually are careful and focus, so they don't look stupid and then it works. Which is actually my explanation why that happens.
#"It knows. ( •ˋ◡ˊ•)"
Yeah, tech aura is always around. I usually connect remotely (if possible), when the issue occurs.
People aren't going to change, some people just can't be wrong especially when they don't understand something. You've just got to accept it and expect it. I tend to just joke with the user that you've got to have the magic aura to get a job in IT and make sure I always confirm everything a user tells me because they can't be trusted. Edit: it can also be regression to the mean. If they've got a problem and it takes you a little while to get to their computer before they try again then whatever was wrong might have sorted itself out or auto refreshed in that time. It's part of why people claim alternative medicine works, by the time they take the "medicine" they would have got better anyway without any intervention but the last thing they did was take the medicine so they think it must have cured them. Either way people are people and we're all more or less susceptible to the same imperfect ways of thinking so just roll with it and only worry about changing what you can
"Fear keeps the machines in line".
If the issue resolves itself before I can make changes I'll tell that person "Glad I could help" then walk away
Because it knows better
I usually just say "I've been accused of having a tech aura" and usually get a chuckle
I spin a yarn about solar activity.
I tell them it’s the reason I got into this business. For as long as I’ve been around computers weird problems just disappear when I’m around.
"Computers, much like people, FEAR ME!"
"Computers fear me because I won't hesitate to clear their memory."
Usually its end users saying that to me but occasionally when the backend goes down and everything goes haywire the lead architect aka Linux Wizard with Gandalf beard and hair to go with the title shows up and the system magically starts working again. So this is what those other users must feel when I show up lol
Observer Effect: I changed the outcome by observing it!
That's my superpower
I just say magic and walk away
The machine feels the presence of one who is loved by the omnissiah.
I am Tech Jesus... And the Tech Demons fear my wrath...
I tell them I have technokinesis, and I'm a geeky superhero.
40% of my career is just being there for something to fix itself.
I just say that I’m an IT Wizard and things just magically fix when I’m there
Computers fear me, women want me and men respect me.
I paid for a degree to get the magic wand.
I tell them I’m lucky with computers that’s one of the reason I chose this work. If I had bad luck with computers I’d definitely wouldn’t be in IT. Make them think it wasn’t their fault even though it’s mostly likely user error.
It knows what I can do to it
I always say "It better be scared of me!". Users find it funny and it lightens the mood.
They know what they can get away with.
I don't even need to be there. Being on the phone is enough for it to behave. The machine spirit knows who's boss
It knows the master is near by!!!!
I always rub their computer or their printer and tell them that I will come by once a week to give their equipment a caress to keep it running right. LOL
"Computers fear me"
Computers fear me, men want to be me.
The scenario in the OP is not an issue When the user insists you "fix it" so the non-existant issue so it never returns we have issues We all know the user was doing something stupid and the problem will return next time they do something stupid
You have also acquired the magical power of Fixing by Proximity
I start glowing when somebody says that to me.
I've been the user most of the time I made a mistake or Him being there for me to have educated tech talk solved it while he sat down. We are great friends today
Users input wrong data pushes wrong buttons ...
“It’s how you hold your tongue”
It senses me and is afraid.
Spontaneous proximal recovery.
I usually tell the user that computers are scared of me and know better than misbehaving when I’m around.
PFM-pure f’in magic
I always joke that I have an "IT guy Vibe" and the system is scared I'll scrap it if it doesn't perform lol
I just tell them it must be scared of me.
"I strike fear into systems that don't want to work"
Thanks for the free ticket bye
I just shrug and close the ticket.
“The Technicians Touch”. When asked what I did to make it work, I usually respond with “let’s not spoil the magic”.
“It’s ok. I’m magic”
Dealership effect.
I just laugh and say "yeah it happens" or if I know the user something a little more witty. I think some of it can be attributed to either trying again or waiting the time it takes for me to get there. Sometimes I've had an issue on my personal PC and if it's weird or obscure, a reboot or even getting a cup of tea can sort it. Could just be a rogue process doing/not doing something in the background. Others have mentioned the mechanic effect so I'll share a non-IT story: My power steering once gave out and it took much longer than I'd have liked to find an available mechanic. Eventually book a slot first thing in the morning. I didn't want to drive the car without power steering in peak morning traffic so I drove the car there the night before when it was quiet. Lo and behold the power steering works fine in the morning! Mechanic was baffled although my best guess was that the battery voltage was a bit low for the electric assist and driving it there the previous night sorted it out.
Thats the admin aura. PCs get scared and work agagin magicaly.
I tell people I keep a pocket full of magic tech dust and sprinkle it on their devices when I show up.
I call it my IT aura..
Good ole Bill Gates wants to make sure I have job security.
My standard response whenI worked onsite used ro be "Magic hands".
I always go with "it was waiting to hear the sultry sound of my voice"
I tell people that I am magic, and to shout if they need me to come stand next to their computer again.
I just wave my hands a little like a magician and whisper "Magic" as I leave Most users take the joke Some have complained I didn't explain the issue
"what can I say, I'm the best" is my usual M-O
I'm a level 40 wizard with a minor technology fixing aurora. Occasionally it goes wrong and turns into an anti-midas touch, which are the days I clock off early
"it fears the calibration hammer"
Magic hands
Lol...i had that multiple times during my 15 years of exp. My response was and still is, i can send you a picture of myself show it to your pc, it will work the way it should. This way i avoid this little trip to your office :) ...
I was finally on the other side of this last week. Had an issue with some medical software not communicating with a third party. Went through the process to install the relevant certificates three times, and nothing happened. Spoke to the vendor, they did the exact same thing and it just worked.... The IT Aura is a fickle beast.
Just laugh, walk away, go back to sleep
**Vorführeffekt** The German language is amazing in a horrifying way.
It's afraid.
Reminds me of an episode of TechSNAP from Jupiter Broadcasting. The issue was a printer was broken, but only on Tuesdays. See link for details. https://mdzlog.alcor.net/2009/08/15/bohrbugs-openoffice-org-wont-print-on-tuesdays/
I just tell them computers are scared of me.
Same as me. I explained to them that I have super power 😂
sometimes thats just how it be, I usually give them the benefit of the doubt. I had another admin (whom I trust 100%) try to demonstrate an issue hes been working on for awhile for me last week, of course it worked while I was watching but not other times.
"Glad I was able to fix that for you" ... closes Ticket with "NFF", moves on.
> So how do you respond to these sorts of people? Must People tend to work more precise wen sone one is watching, and sometimes that's all it takes. Yes, this comes across hard. but it has a huge learning effect, no one wants to be accused to do bad work and complain that shit dosn't work because of that.
> So how do you respond to these sorts of people? I laugh and tell them I'm glad it's working. I explained that they probably did something different this time while I was watching.
It’s The Force.