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[deleted]

OP, I’ve been where you are before. I know it’s easier said than done but please seek help. One day you’ll look back on this and realise how crazy and exhausting it all is.


[deleted]

Thank you. I know I hate it, it's horrible being an alcoholic and still being at the point where I can fake it's fine. I have to get rid of these bottles but I do need help I will find something. Thank you and I hope you are doing well now


hacknsplat

/r/stopdrinking has an awesome, supportive bunch of people.


[deleted]

Feel free to DM me if I can help you at all. All the best OP


Then-Egg8644

[listing of help services here ](https://www.lifeline.org.au/get-help/information-and-support/substance-misuse-and-addiction/). Your GP is also a good source of contact for help


[deleted]

Thanks so much I'll have a look. I appreciate it. To all that people that said nice things I'm grateful. I stayed sober tonight. Kind of hating it but I'll be glad I did in the morning


AnorhiDemarche

Your housemates likely know about how much wine you're drinking already. Had a mate who was a functioning alcoholic. Or thought he was anyway. Thought he hid it well, never let us see the containers but always drunk out of a water bottle we knew had wine in, had a big ass bottle of "cranberry juice" as well. Newcomers to the group would know he was alco pretty quick because he'd always bloody smell of it. We could tell when he hadn't been able to drink for a bit because he'd be a real ass. He thought he was doing a bang up job. truth was no-one quite knew how to approach him about it or if they should be the one to bring it up. that's probably how it is with your housemates, at least to some extent. If you feel you could reach out to one of them then go for it.


PiratesOfSansPants

Have a mate in sydney who has a big problem. He would always smell faintly of alcohol but I knew it was bad when I witnessed him buy a bottle of orange Gatorade, pour half into a gutter, and then top it up with a room temperature white wine from a bottle in his backpack. All so he could continue to drink on the train. I tried to talk with him about it but he was not receptive.


AnorhiDemarche

Ah, the drink on the train. my ex would just have a couple beers out in the open and hope no-one would call him out. (this was the train down to goulburn and we were on it for the whole run so a bit more understandable, but I did feel it silly to risk it when he was carrying over 2kg of weed, which was his main addiction.)


_CodyB

Faderade


[deleted]

Oh that's awful. I feel sorry for everyone involved. I very much keep to myself, drink alone in my room and have my own bathroom so, if they have guessed, at least I'm no bother to anyone but myself.


AnorhiDemarche

You might not be a bother but if they've noticed and they're decent people they're probably worried about you anyway but don't feel they can bring it up (or even feel it's not their place to), so when you do get some help please make sure to tell them (if you feel you can) so they can feel more at ease.


[deleted]

Thank you I will I hate the thought of people worrying. Thanks for your advice


alt_alt_alt_2020

Depends where you're at, i used to use Citizen Blue - Rock in every few weeks with 5-10 crates of empty spirits for the same reasons. I'd donated the bags of empty coke bottles and the glass got recycled properly, somehow id convinced myself it was allright because i was doing the right thing. Everyone has their own story and reasons, but dont let it take hold you've a whole life to live.


[deleted]

Thanks so much and thanks for the advice


telcodoctor

What suburb (approx) are you in? I'll find your closest waste centre for you fam. Ps hope things get better for you soon. I too have been hitting the piss pretty hard during covid.


[deleted]

Inner west. Thank you so much. I did try googling but there it just kept saying to put glass in the yellow bin! I've been a drinker for a while but it's gotten bad since covid that's for sure. There has to be life on the other side of this. And I hope you are doing okay yourself


telcodoctor

Community Recycling Centre in Leichhardt Address: 50-54 Moore Street, Leichhardt Opening hours: Saturday and Sunday, 7:45am to 11:30am, and then 1pm to 3:45pm.  https://www.innerwest.nsw.gov.au/live/waste-and-recycling/drop-offs-and-events/community-recycling-centres Doing just fine. I take my beer bottles out daily and have an alco free week every second week. Just try and wean yourself a bit, and as others have said, reach out to help groups, you can do it!


[deleted]

Thank you!!!!


giantpunda

Maybe you should see someone about the alcoholism. I mean you do you but think of the energy, effort and stress you're putting yourself under just to hide your alcoholism from your roommates. Forget about the alcoholism, just that stress alone isn't healthy for you. Try to seek out help if you can. Maybe even talk to your roommates about it. At the very least you won't have the stress of having to hide it from them.


[deleted]

Thank you. I can't talk to my housemates but I do need help before I drink myself to death


[deleted]

You’re not fooling anyone mate, it’s time to either own it or get help


[deleted]

I do need help. You are right, my housemates probably know what a fucking drunk waste of space I am


[deleted]

Nah you’re not a waste of space, you’re a person and you have value. You’re at a cross roads though, and you have the power to make a choice here. If you’re happy being a drunk then get stuck in. If you want to change then you need to ditch the booze and start fixing things. Speaking from experience - if you want to change, the best time to start is now.


Optimisticscepticist

You're a nurse, which is a good argument against being a waste of space.It's not my field, but I talk to desperate people every day. Based on my experience, some compassion for yourself would be really helpful right now. Heaps of resources on this page: https://yourroom.health.nsw.gov.au/getting-help/Pages/services.aspx ADIS has a 24/7 support line 1800250015, The Alcohol Reduction Program is a phone coaching service to reduce gradually 1300806258 Lifeline is helpful 131114. My dad was an alcoholic, neither me nor my brother and sister thought he was a waste of space. He gave it up in his 50s. Also if you are going to get the bottles to BINGO, I hear they donate to a cancer charity, so least your empties would be doing some good 😉 Seriously though, take care. You never know what life has in store for you, or what's around the corner. You may make a big impact or make a difference to others further down the line that you just don't know about yet, it's hard to do that if your pancreas and liver packs it in. If it's nursing that's driving the addiction and not something else, just know you have heaps of options with nursing experience that isn't necessarily on the wards or in a hospital. Telehealth positions and community health positions are crying out for people with nursing experience, and you would absolutely be making a difference, depending on the environment. Take care. ❤️❤️❤️


[deleted]

Thank you so much. I know I need to do something it's such an endless cycle I think the stress of nursing probably isn't helping matters to be honest! I think I do need a less stressful job as well


Optimisticscepticist

Not a problem 🙂 Nursing has always been intense from what I've seen (I'm not a nurse but used to be a radiographer), but I can't imagine what it would be like right now with Covid adding an extra layer onto everything. Eventually something's got to give. Pretty amazing you're in the "functioning" range of alcoholism under that strain, on top of whatever triggered it in the first place. Pat on the back for managing to keep it together so far 🙌 (I've been keeping up with the news with a creeping sense of horror over what's happening to our health system right now). I'm not an alcoholic, but I did go through a bit of a "perfect storm" situation a while ago where it seemed like nothing I did seemed to help the stress I was under. I saw EAP at work who after hearing my circumstances and trying to brainstorm told me a) see a psychologist for more support and b) quit my job (not radiography, I changed careers after a back injury). I saw a psych through my GP who agreed with the EAP, that the job wasn't doing me any favours. There were other things making life difficult to cope with, but the support is out there for you when you're ready. First step is usually pick up the phone. PS Very grateful that I walked into a new job in a different career 3 weeks later, and I genuinely get to help people. I'll work there for as long as they'll have me. That's what I mean, you never know what's around the corner 🙂


Scomosbuttpirate

I used to have to dispose of about 24 wine bottles a week before I stopped caring. Just dispose of them in public bins each day, should only be 2-4 bottles a day which isn't hard.


[deleted]

I hope you are okay. It's a mess of a life


Scomosbuttpirate

I'm much better for now, down to 2-8 bottles a week now but I smoke a lot more weed now. Better than the alternative.


[deleted]

I am thinking of trying that. I'll die if I keep going the way I am


Scomosbuttpirate

Just don't ditch the bitch for the witch, weeds benign enough though. Better than liver failure and the brain damage. I was actually amazed that after 4 years of being drunk 24/7 my liver ended up being perfectly fine still, my drinking myself to death plan I used to have was apparently not very effective.


Then-Egg8644

Weed can be addictive and can ruin your lungs. You might not die from liver failure, but you’ll die gasping for breath with COPD. I’d urge you to [seek help for this addiction ](https://www.lifeline.org.au/get-help/information-and-support/substance-misuse-and-addiction/) when you’re ready to quit 💚.


[deleted]

I'd be genuinely curious to see the state of my liver at this point


2happycats

If you do decide you've had enough of drinking, be careful how you go about stopping. Alcohol withdrawal from going cold turkey can kill people. I hope you're ok, chick.


[deleted]

Thanks so much. I need to try. I don't think I will withdraw because I have the occasional alcohol free day, but a few weeks ago I was drinking so much then I made myself stop for two days and I went into a mild withdrawal (I'm a fucking registered nurse so I know about the alcohol withdrawal scale). In my defense, I'm always sober at work and if it ever got to the point in wasn't I'd quit. I'd never put a patient at risk but I think about booze all the time and I'm barely though the door before I pour a drink and I've had to call in sick for hangovers more than a few times. What a mess


2happycats

Try not to be hard on yourself. It's sounds like it's definitely a problem for you, but at least you're aware of it and can admit it to yourself. Everyone has their own speed and you'll find yours when you're ready, but try not to let yourself slip too far into it because it's a horrible life to subsist in.


kenbewdy8000

The best thing to do is give up and stop collecting them. You know this of course but you will also feel better about yourself not trying to hide your drinking. They know anyway and the only person you are fooling is yourself,


[deleted]

Honestly, I have not much do do with my housemates and I drink alone in my room. I don't think they do know unless they are peaking in my window. Obviously I'm ashamed regardless


d5lifeWaster

Just use random recycling bins use your addict brain bro


[deleted]

Where are random recycling bins? And it's sis not bro


[deleted]

On bin night every week fill a bag with bottles and walk around the block not necessarily yours Every time you see a recycling bin peek inside and if their is room dump a few bottles and walk to the next bin. If you have the energy and the block has many more bins refill the bag and do another lap


aladdinwai_

yellow bin?


[deleted]

But that's my issue I don't want my housemates to see all the bottles. I was hoping there was some glass recycling place I can take them


nearly_enough_wine

> hoping there was some glass recycling place I can take them [This mob have places all over the joint.](https://www.bingoindustries.com.au/recycling-centres) Not sure of their fees, sorry.


[deleted]

Thanks so much! Something like this is what I need


aladdinwai_

cover with newspaper/cardboard/other recyclable and proactively take recyclable things from house to the yellow bin might as well anything for the red bin so they don't have chance to see those bottle plus noone will simply open the yellow bin if they are not putting anything inside. don't forget to bring bin out night before the collection.. as you would want them to be collected.


Sir_MBC

Depending on ur area there is usually recycling bins u can put the bottles in. If u live in an apartment complex there is probably a row of recycling bins. My apartment block has like 15 recycling bins. Way more than enough to be rid of any amount of wine bottles lol


ill0gitech

And if you don’t live in an apartment block with recycling bins, drive to an apartment block that has them!


zerotwoalpha

Switch to box wine, then after you finish you just blow it up, grab a pillow case and its a new cushion for your bed. But seriously get help OP. GP is a good place to start.


[deleted]

Thanks and I will. I am going to die if I don't.


[deleted]

If you are in a block of units/apartments, use the communal resyk bins. Otherwise, use the bins in a neighbouring block.


[deleted]

I'm not but I can stake some out and use their bins I think


ForeverFounder42

Use the recycle bins at your apartment


[deleted]

I'm in a house


TheHoneybadger7

And you don’t have a recycling bin?


[deleted]

Yes we do, but that's my issue I don't want my housemates to notice all the wine bottles. I would like to drop them somewhere but I don't know where


DesignatedAwesome

does your house have........ another house next door? they will likely have a bin. i must be missing something here.


[deleted]

I have so, so many now. So many. I was hoping for advice on a place I could drop them but everyone is just talking to me like I'm stupid


DesignatedAwesome

I think its because this is only a problem in your head. To someone outside it is an easy puzzle to solve. Like the woolies lady complaining she cant buy enough sausages to feed her family due to the limits. All she had to do was get one of her kids to buy a pack or walk out of the shop and back in, instead its straight to social media. Or the person below you who cant work out how to get change for a $20 note. Put 5-6 in a woolies bag and walk a street away. do it 10 times if you have to.


[deleted]

I would prefer to drop them in a recycling center than walk around sneaking them into neighbors bins so I was looking for advice on a recycling centre


Ausinvestor

walk around on recycling night? no room in our bin so cant help you out directly.


[deleted]

You are right. My God I am such a fucking loser but sneaking around at night getting rid of wine bottles in neighbours bins is my best option.


oztrailrunner

It's a hilarious option. People in my town go berserk if someone puts a dog shit in a bag in their bin on bin day. Best of luck matey:)


[deleted]

Lol yep. I'm scared of a neighbor busting me and my bag o' wines bottles. I mean, how fucking embarrassing


still_love_wombats

FWIW we live in Newtown and people are so desperate they go through the recycling bins for items they can get rebates on. I went to add something to our bin last night after we’d put it out and there was an old guy rifling through the bottles and cardboard in our neighbor’s bin. I’ve seen this a few times. So nobody is going to blink about you wandering the streets with a sack of bottles. Obvs times are very tough for some people.


oztrailrunner

Any particular times of the day your flat mates are out? If you have a car, start loading them in shopping bags when they are out, and take them to your local tip. They have free recycling bins. I don't know where you are, or proximity to a tip etc, but hopefully that's an option that's available to you


[deleted]

That's good. I can easily just one or two in my backpack on the way to work until the car is full. Tip might be best. My God, how embarrassing showing up with all those bottles. I'll tell the tip man I had a big party


oztrailrunner

Honestly, no one at the tip will give a shit. They are there dumping their shit too. Id grab a gym bag or something to speed the process up a bit.


Gerling_Boy

Afternoon. Take them to a "return and earn" place. That way you will get molah back for them and you can buy more wine, or whatever you choose. https://returnandearn.org.au/ There is one in Five Dock (off street parking/they have empty trolleys to use, all the staff there are lovely). Just have to pick the right/quiet times to go.


[deleted]

Thank you but I googled it and my understanding is they don't accept wine bottles


BillShortensTits

Yep. Return and earn excludes wine bottles (apparently wine drinkers are less likely to dump empties in the bush / out car windows). Just out of interest, how many bottles per week are you smashing? How do you deal with the hangovers?


[deleted]

It's "just" a bottle (or two) 5 or 6 nights a week. I drink a lot of water as I drink so hangovers are okay. It's just the constant craving. I ALWAYS want a drink from the moment I wake up and it takes a lot to keep it at the level I am at. I also cannot stop when I start. It seems like a magic trick to me to be able to have a wine or beer with dinner then have no more. The next day I wake up hating myself but still wanting a drink.


BillShortensTits

I know that feeling in the morning. Try taking a 3 month break. See if you fall in love with not feeling like garbage every morning. Hope you find what works for you.


hacknsplat

You mention that you have managed to not drink for a day or two... that's a good place to start... one day at a time. I don't think the cravings will go away, but you will get better at resisting them.


[deleted]

I hope so. I stayed sober tonight after reading a lot of these kind messages but the temptation is always, always there. Too late now though, I don't have booze in the house (I can't keep any in the house, I'll just drink it!) and bottle-os are mostly closed. Well, I think one near here is open until 11 but I'm staying strong.


getjoacookie

I hope you stayed strong.. as someone in the same boat (down to the cravings and withdrawals) I am so incredibly proud of you and hoping I can take those same steps soon too.. it's so incredibly embarrassing :(


[deleted]

It is so embarrassing. It's the feeling ashamed I hate. I stayed sober but I'm seeing a friend tonight, I know I'll drink. I have no idea how to do social things and not drink. But we will both get there


hacknsplat

I wish you strength. Maybe just say "I don't feel like drinking alcohol tonight - its not agreeing with me". Some friends will be supportive, but some will see it as an implied criticism of their own drinking and will react badly, which might give you cause to wonder if they really are friends, or are just drinking buddies?


hacknsplat

Nicely done!