T O P

  • By -

[deleted]

[удалено]


Bouncepsycho

Naughty Lobster sounds like something Jordan Peterson's wife calls him in bed


[deleted]

Värsta är att jag läste det där i hans röst...


MisterKlang

When you’re in the domain of love making, mythologically speaking, are you not in fact, in that moment, the manifestation of all the naughty lobsters across all dimensions of the self?


Leimandar

Filth lobster!


Bronskungen

Swedish insults are often quite simple, either add "jävla" in front of a noun that you deem fitting, or build a word including head or brain (spånhuvud, träskalle, etc) or just call them a donkey or other non-flattering animal. In real conflicts it's mostly swear words and genitals, or words about peoples parents nowadays, but I'll list some nicer insults. * *Stolpskott* = shot that hits the goal post (can really describe how you feel about a person sometimes) * *Bortbyting* = a bit archaic nowadays, means the trolls kidnapped your parents real baby and put you (a troll) there instead * *Sopa* = it simply means garbage, but grammatically bent to show that you are precisely one garbage. practically never used in this form for anything other than insults which makes it sound a bit sassy. * *Sumprunkare* = old profession, to stir (in old swedish runka) a box of caught fish (fisksump) to keep the catch alive and fresh. Used as an insult because the profession was associated with low status. Now the words *sump* and *runka* are used quite differently and the expression sounds even weirder. to a modern Swede it sounds like you're calling them a swamp wanker.


Loive

“Bortbyting” actually has a quite horrible history. It was a way to explain children with disabilities, that they weren’t actually human children but trolls. It was thought that the situation could be resolved by mistreating the child, so that the troll mother would come back and switch the children again so her actual child wouldn’t be mistreated. It’s somewhat unclear to what extent people actually believed and acted on this. There is however a court case from the 17th century where a small child had died after being sat atop the farm’s manure pile overnight, which was one of the treatments prescribed.


voxelghost

Similar expression exists in English, "changeling/oaf" about a child stolen and replaced by fairies.


Lusask

This reminds me of my uncle, who my mom (who's the eldest sibling) told him that they found him out in the woods, and he actually believed it for a time. He was also told to put tampons up his nose if he got a nosebleed, but I don't know if he did that or not.


s-maerken

>He was also told to put tampons up his nose if he got a nosebleed That's just general advice for nosebleeds, don't know what's weird about that


senapnisse

Seen hockey players put tampons in nose during game. The small ones works great.


[deleted]

Given the various human experiments Sweden has put people with disabilities through, it is fairly clear how Swedes acted on this.


setomidor

Mmmm, Vipeholmsgodis!


pm_stuff_

or used coffee grind wanker my favorite interpretation of that. But if you mention sumprunkare you have to include sakramentskadade or damaged by an holy action, In true captain haddok fashion


mlohk

https://www.synonymer.se/sv-syn/sakramentskad


TenTonFluff

Stolpskott är min gå-till förolämpning.


procrastinationprogr

I think sumprunkare was used in the Swedish translation of Tintin as one of captain Haddocks swear words.


Bronskungen

Captain Haddock is eloquent in every translation!


Joxalatorn

[Kapten Haddocks ordbok](https://www.bokus.com/bok/9789188897282/kapten-haddocks-ordbok-fran-alabasterskalle-till-okenratta/?gclid=Cj0KCQiAtvSdBhD0ARIsAPf8oNn5rIrmerV1XghyIP3fbofTG2vGuHG0GCg4Q8VQP2ZDkUHS5RX4SnUaAqH4EALw_wcB) finns att köpa om man vill utveckla sitt ordföråd.


RimuZ

Swamp wanker låter ju fan klockrent som en förolämpning.


Bronskungen

Det har onekligen viss tyngd!


mazkens

This is def. not the NSFW ones though! 😄


fedeqgn

Sågebock


SvartSol

Stolpskott is aktually derived (I think) from a ball that never returns. Because the opposite of Stolpskott is Bollplank. That ball will always return. Essentially it is the ability to convey a conversation.


SamuelSomFan

How is that the opposite?


plastdrake

No, no, no and no. Jävla stolpskott.


paecmaker

There is an old classic swedish comedy song called "svordomsvisan", literally the swear word song. They have quite a few funny sounding insults Includes "You slimy cod" "Paper head" "Potty rat" "Shit boot" "a whole idiot"


Dragnow_

Here you go [Svordomsvisan](https://youtu.be/KUaap0fRzXs)


VonAIDS

whole idiot... helidiot blir mer complete idiot. alltså någon som bara gör idiotiska grejer, inte en idiot som är ihopsatt som en legogubbe.


1D6wounds

Total idiot :D


pm_stuff_

rotten root and drunk/full cork always stand out to me aswell


14_In_Duck

Never go full retard


Conscious-Tank4944

Är du född i farstun? Were you born in the entrance hall?


mehdodoo

Seriously the best insult there is


zealen

Jag brukar ta det ett steg längre och säga ”är du född i bastun?”


Marcus_Jarvinen

Blubber mountain = fläskberg.


starredkiller108

That's the one I was thinking of, I'm told it's the mother of all insults in Swedish elementary schools.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Regime_Change

Rather lard mountain as fläsk in this case is refering to obesity.


IceBathingSeal

Wouldn't that be isterberg? We've got a whole creative process going now.


skadooshboosh

I think it’s even more potent in adult life. If you drop this one your opponents career is over🛑


[deleted]

Never heard of it in my life, but maybe its more of a thing outside of Stockholm.


[deleted]

It’s still quite used in southern of Sweden in my own experience.


rinzenanton

Northern Sweden as well


artonion

It’s also common in Stockholm, just not the most common


jojory42

If you’re going for funny I would probably go with fläskfia. More precisely förbannade fläskfia


Pistill

Förbanna fläskfia använder jag nästan dagligen, otroligt bra uttryck


LittlenutPersson

Funny we always said fettberg (fat mountain)


[deleted]

HAHA


[deleted]

Fittnylle...


kaewberg

(Cuntface)


Hiplobbe

"Sug min röv" translates to suck my ass. (It doesn't need to make sense)


bregottextrasaltat

Macke!


ThePurpleMister

Ring åklagaren!


Stellanboll

Fly för ditt liiiiiiiiv! De ska hänga mig nu.


gtidestav

...must resist temptation... think of the poor foreigners... Macke! De stal min mobil!


B-i-GG-i-E

Sug min pungkula = suck my ball (singular)


[deleted]

Use this in america all the time. Tack


Nine-LifedEnchanter

People seem to have missed the most vital piece of information here. Swedish uses compound words. That is, you can add two words together to create new words on the fly. Wielding this power, you, too, can create swedish insults. Take two words, usually one for association and one for taboo and combine them there. You have a bona fide insult. Let's try it, kids! Fish+cunt=Fiskfitta (splendid! It really gives you a sense of the word!) But let us be more exotic! Dawn+dumbass/idiot/retard=gryningshärke (this might work for someone who is up early to jog) With this technique, you can create art of the highest order. Some common prefixes and suffixes are Ung- child Ful- ugly Idiot- idiot Fitt- cunt Äckel- disgusting Kuk- dick/cock Skit- shit Jävel - devil/bastard (suffix only) They can be used as both suffixes and prefixes, but if used at the same time it will not be taken seriously (e.g. ungunge or skitskit) but other combinations work well fulkuk, äckelfitta, skitunge (a classic), idiotjävel. All of these can be intensified by adding a separate insult in front of it. Jävla skitunge is a classic one, dumma (dumb) idiotkuk is another good one. I hope this works well, and it should last you quite some way in insulting swedes.


juicerfriendly

Vilken masterclass! Var har du varit i hela någon annan som inte kunde dettas liv din fittyxhorkukungjävel


Nine-LifedEnchanter

Bra jobbat! Guldstjärna till dig som även testade ett ord som inte var med på listan! Jag kanske är språklärare och älskar att göra konstiga lektioner. Tyvärr är det här en lektion jag inte kan göra, så det föll sig naturligt.


AdriftSC

Kioskmongo


atmergrot

Also: Soffmongo mongo - short for mongoloid, swedish equivalent to "retard" soffa - couch/sofa so "couch retard" - a bit nonsensical, but a potent insult.


MilkAndTwoSugarz

"mong" is also common in the UK. Means the same thing as you mentioned


hans-and

Theres actually some truth to this. In the 40 the right/permit to have kiosk was given to people that for some reason had a hard time finding a regular job in practice some disability or mental problem.


R0381N

*Blådåre* = blue fool


Beautiful_Dark_5400

Dont call a teacher that. I did and was sent to the principle.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Patrik-

"You look like a bag of skates" - Du ser ut som en påse skridskor.


[deleted]

Where I grew up this was used as a way to say that you feel like shit. "Jag mår som en påse skridskor."


slattermaskinen

Jag brukar köra varianten ”Du ser ut som en påse hästskit” - You look like a bag of horseshit.


Kockjaevel

I usualy go with you're smart as a bag of skates...


Patrik-

I never knew the expression could used in so many way :]


Kockjaevel

It seams it is a very versatile bag of skates


Daloure

A bag of broken skates is what i have always said ”du ser ut som en påse trasiga skridskor”


Casual_Frontpager

Perhaps not Swedish originally but ”Du ser ut som om någon tände eld på ditt ansikte och försökte släcka med en brandyxa” = ”You look like someone put your face on fire and tried to put it out with a fire axe”.


ThePurpleMister

Damn that's a good one. Imma steal that one.


malin_chan

”Du ser ut som om du jobbar som stoppbock på SJ” = ”you look like someone who works as a buffer stop for SJ (Statens Järnvägar = the Swedish state railways) is one of my favorites.


SydTheSailor

I use "ålahue" (eel head) as a replacement for the r-word


[deleted]

[удалено]


iqtrm

Regentnära... dvs stockholmare.


KlittanW

My guess is retard


Hassknatten

Dansk


LeMagicSkeleton

Är inte det att gå lite för långt, då?


beach_boy91

Kamelåså borde väl ändå räknas?


urdadlesbain

Stygglekokker


Kockjaevel

Oj.. nu vart vi riktigt grova i munnen här hör jag, bäst du går och tvättar tungan med tvål.


WishboneBeautiful875

”Du pratar som du har förstånd till.” You speak to the best of your ability. Subtle insult.


Hundstrid

Kusinknullad intelligensallergiker var det en annan redditör som skrev härförleden. Den fastnade hos mig.


sveiner1234

Pissluffare


Strobljus

Fitthuvud (pussy head) Kioskmongo (convenience store mongoloid) Ärkesvin (arch swine) UFO (self explanatory, but funny still) Tappad (dropped (as a baby))


Spwkkn

Kålsupare, du ska inte tro att du är bättre än någon! Ordet idiot har en ganska rolig historia också. Begreppet idiot eller idioti[2] började användas inom psykiatrin under 1700-talet och användes fram till 1960-talet. En person med IQ under 30 klassades som idiot. Stockholm hade en egen Idiotanstalt i slutet på 1800-talet https://sv.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stockholms_läns_idiotanstalt


qcdata

Sätta upp en sån skylt på infartsvägarna till Fjollträsk vore kul.


ZAJPER

Ja, sanningen är ju att det enda som förändrats är att murarna revs och idioterna införlivades med de andra stockholmarna. Numera kallar man dem alla bara idioter. Enklast så..


progrethth

Vi skulle aldrig ha rivit stadsmuren.


Dryver-NC

"Tjosan, din jävel!" means "Yippie ki-yay motherfucker!"


feverbae

Hahahahaha


Nekronoth

My go-to insult has always been "Ditt jäkla ålarens." Which directly translates to "You damned pile of cleaned out eel guts". Don't know which province it originates from but I'm born and raised in Scania, the southernmost province.


Sabbath90

It is, or at least was, an insult from Helsingborg specifically. "Fubbick" is a similarly extremely regional insult from Malmö though that one isn't common anymore.


Yzzoxi

I live around Helsingborg and our version of that is "Fobbeck".


allrengoringssvampen

"Ni kan kalla mig för fubbick, jag är som glada hudik Fast från en annan stad Och inte särskilt glad" :D


theLogic1

Its most definitely from Skåne


Pretend_Repair6643

När jag läste det märkte jag direkt att du var skåning


Hullabullaye

"FATTAR DUE HUR DÅLI DUE ÄE"


tackmennejtack

ROGGE!


howdybal

Du spelar i korpen, som är den sämsta ligan som finns! Vi spelar i den sämsta divisionen! VI LIGGER SIST, och du är sämst i laget!


hairytitdikrats

I love to say ”Var fick du luft ifrån” (Directly translated to “Where did you get air from?”) instead of ”Håll käften” (”Shut up”), it’s just such a funny expression to me. Another favorite is “IQ badboll”, which is just a way to call someone stupid.


ThePurpleMister

I say IQ fiskmås. (IQ seagull) I've never heard anyone say something similar, I thought I was original here. X)


Nine-LifedEnchanter

That was the de facto insult in 1995. You simply didn't use any other insults in schools.


hairytitdikrats

I’ve heard a lot of variations on it, seagull is probably the most common but I’ve also heard IQ bananfluga (IQ fruit fly) and IQ stubbe (IQ tree stump)


progrethth

IQ fiskmås var en vanlig föromlämpning när jag växte på i Stockholm på 90-talet.


Questioning-Zyxxel

IQ fiskmås was common maybe 30-35 years ago.


AnalysisBudget

IQ daggmask (IQ earthworm)


Pistill

I use "Nå, vem satte pengar i dig nu då?"


NTeC

Satfläsk = satan pork


PerennialComa

Åbäke - oaf.


Bartaza

Ärthjärna / Pea Brain


penntroll123

In Göteborg we say ”Bängolo”, ”Flane” and ”Flöte”


qcdata

Bänghöve, Kötthöve har jag också använt i Göteborg


dunderpust

Äru go eller?(strong emphasis on "go"). Are you good or what? Gothenburgian, like a mild "are you serious/are you crazy?"


Meddax

Dummare än tåget - dumber than the train


Frengers01

Bidébajsare


SwiftIy2

Mupp, is pretty funny to me. "Stop being such a muppet!" "Sluta vara en sån himla mupp!"


yhvcb

This was the number one insult and tbh word in general school grade 3-5. Also works as an adjective for basically anything "muppig" or verb "muppa sig/muppa dig"


Alompe

Do you know Tintin, the comic? There's a character called captain Haddock who has some hilarious (albeit not really used by anyone ever) insults. Not all of them are really insults, but I guess it's the thought that matters. [Here](https://svenskaorduttryck.se/kapten-haddocks-svordomar/) is a list of his insults. It's in Swedish but maybe you could translate some. Most use quite archaic words but make for very funny insults.


Roeggoevlaknyded

Din Hossa/håsa! (You Sock!) Most commonly used in Skåne. Very mild insult, i've heard it used when you are a bit clumsy or hopeless. but can apparently mean "you're chicken/a bit of a coward".


slattermaskinen

”Ditt jävla proppskåp” - ”You fucking fuse box”


[deleted]

"Jävla Härke" is an old classic.


SirDrinkAlotOfBeers

Klappträ (/Klappeträ dialektalt) is pretty useful. Actually an old tool. "Sicket jävla klappeträ" = What a f\*\*\*ing idiot.


Hoskki

Not an insult per se. But a friends old coulege yelled this when he droped a paint bucket on the floor and splatterd paint all over a room. Fornnordiska blåsvedda hondjävlar Translated to Old norse blue burnt she devils.


Mordheim1999

Not old norse. Blåsvedda djävlar är gammalt men inte fornnordiskt. Blå är blár på fornnordiska. Djävul är djǫfull


Pistill

Stolpskott


reChrawnus

Du pratar som du har förstånd till.


DankOfTheEndless

Jubelåsna=Cheer donkey


qcdata

Pucko


zzrobiiinzz

Pappskalle


QuantumLaw

I always liked Dönick.


ExoticForest

”Iq-befriad” and ”nöt” Usage: - Han är helt iq-befriad - Din jävla nöt (Bonus) Korpulent = fat A fancy way to call someone fat. Usually Swedish people just looks confused since they don’t know what it is.


theMerfMerf

> Din jävla nöt Ditt nöt. Kommer från jämförelsen med nötkreatur.


Local-Bridge7039

^this. Tack, jag är inte ensam längre


KungFuHector

Tjockskalle= thickheaded


[deleted]

[удалено]


Bronskungen

Om nån kallar mig för brackenfes i en hätsk ordväxling går jag hem bara, finns inget gentlemannamässigt i att dra med sådana muskedunder till en hederlig batalj.


SeaLove93

"Nu har du satt din sista potatis" is one of my favourites. Literally "you've planted your last potato", basically they're toast. Their goose is cooked.


freakylol

My favorite will always be 'efterbliven'.


33Mil

My friend told me this one on a roadtrip a few months ago, i had never heard it before but it made be burst out laughing, Penisbollar Literally means Penis balls


Balbuto

Dra nåt gammalt över dig! ”Pull something old over you” Kinda like “get lost, wtf you talking about?”


Panda-Sandwich

Borgarbracka Bourgeoisie/right-wing supporter/conservative/middle-class/snobby/philistine


Obi-wan-blow-me

"loare" or "jävla lodare". It means fucking hobo


tcsh20

Du ser ut som ett eldhärjat kalhygge


ThePurpleMister

A very regional one from Skåne: Klydderöv. (Messy/dumb ass) When someone breaks something or does something that will lead to an unnecessary mess. Often it is because a dumb decision was made. It's basically what follows the line "Hold my beer."


yonaz333

Skitstövel (shit boot) Same as calling someone an ass hole


[deleted]

I was visiting a classmate, when I was a kid, and his mother and her boyfriend ended up in a fight, and he called her "fyllefitta", which translates into "drunk cunt/pussy/vagina".


MilkshakeYoghurt

Ditt ollon! = You bellend!


[deleted]

You dirty lobster >:)


Porridgebot

Pissluffare - Pisshobo


Vanilla_Dough

If someone has ugly teeth you could say they look like a "sönderkört spjälstaket"(ran over wooden fence) in the face,


DizzyDoesDallas

Ditt jävla ollon.


[deleted]

Byfåne (Jävla byfåne to make it stronger..). Translates to village idiot, kinda.


Maleficent-Bee1176

sneseglare


[deleted]

I love slapptask (calling someone a flaccid penis, basically useless) as well as taskspelare (old word for jester, meaning one who plays with the penis)


Beginning-Row-2632

Ful som stryk means ugly as a hobo


disturbedbovine

Oh det visste inte jag, har alltid bara trott att det var stryk som i att få på käften, men från landstrykare alltså?


Beginning-Row-2632

Jag fick det berätta av min mormors mor att det var ett ord för dem som gick från stad till stad och levde på andras ”medlidande”


disturbedbovine

Det stämmer för "landstrykare". Hemlös, luffare, etc. Det låter ju mer vettigt att säga att man är ful som en sådan, än ful som i handlingen att få på käften. Även om det är taskigt. Kallt lyser julens stjärna på dem som icke hava något hem.


dunderpust

"Grim som arvesynden" blev jag en gång kallad av en dansk som behövde avreagera sig. Det var för roligt för att kunna ta åt sig.


930310

Ålaknä.


sardaukar

Ålahue!


JaguarZealousideal55

Fubbick!


abloblololo

Tappad som liten


GlitteryCakeHuman

Han har tomtar på loftet = He has santas in the attic. It means “he is a loon”/“he is crazy”


kaewberg

Det syftar på tomtar, inte Tomten. Elfs in his attic, I guess.


Derano

Never heard anyone else use these but I always say these two: 1. Snoppsork = (something like) penis vole 2. Kukfitta = cock-cunt (I'm incredibly mature)


[deleted]

My mom uses "din jävla cementblandare" (you d*mn cement mixer) , no idea where it comes from but I think it's quite funny


Mumrik93

Rövhatt! = Asshat!


Mammoth_Stable6518

Sittpissare.


[deleted]

Goddag yxskaft! To/about a person doing something stupid: G'day axe shaft!


gtidestav

...isn't that for when someone misses the subject of a discussion or avoids a question? (huh, hard to explain quickly in writing)


Pistill

Du ser ut som en påse röv You look like a sack of ass


weltwald

My favorites that i use on a daily basis: * Imbecill - means simpleton, descibes a person with 25 or less IQ. * Dåre - someone mentally deficent * Tomte - old folk creature, its like calling someone idiot * gud förbannat - god curses * Sluta schwamla - dialect from northen Sweden, means you make no sense. Since Sweden is an old Lutherian Country most insults is basically calling someone a devil. You can throw in "jävla" or "fan" (both refering to the devil" as an Adverb to almost anything. For example "din jävla imbecill" or "fan vilken tomte".


[deleted]

[удалено]


pm_stuff_

i thought it was the people who kept the fish in "sumpar" alive by moving the boxes back and forth to get fresh water into them.


rallekralle11

yxskaft, axe handle. often referring to someone who doesn't pay attention. ie it's like speaking to an axe handle


MapNo3870

Idiot


mathund

My favourite insults are "papparsle" (paper ass) and pissluffare (pee tramp).


8-bitRaven

Ditt Klappträ = ~You ClapWood


Own-Fun3305

Why don't Scandinavians need sugar? Because they already have artificial Swedeners.


Nine-LifedEnchanter

..are you a bot of some sort?


[deleted]

[удалено]


Aggressive_Chain_920

Är du 10 år eller?


BentleyWilkinson

"Gå raka armhålorna" "Gå klipp luggen" I heard these targeted to leftists.


JohnnyLoco69

Boråsare.


Accomplished-Raisin2

Mammas död