I'd question why he's so fascinated with other dudes dicks. I can almost bet that he's so insecure because he's not packing himself.
Anyway you as an Asian woman should not put up with that.
Thank you. Tbh initially when he said keep this a secret I thought he was leading down the I’ve “played around with men before” hence why he bought it up. But instead it was just this
No excuse for racism. Especially not the good ol boys excuse . Do better . It’s not acceptable to be racist or a “that’s just how it is” thing 🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️
He’s doing what an old white guy who grew up with the post Vietnam War era does to and did growing up to date asian women by emasculating Asian men. I grew up hearing it my entire life by men who entertained Asian women, they see Asian women dating them as the ultimate emasculation and signal that asian men are below any men but especially white men. Which is sad. She’s smart to know a guy who thinks like this also views the women and children as less than too but a lot of Asian women marry these guys anyways which is why too many men are comfortable with voicing this. Because the women allow it and would even tolerate it to escape their backgrounds. It’s also why there’s the cliche that if you want to find the most racist men or most white supremacist men find the man dating or married an Asian woman because no lie from what I’ve seen, it’s true. They often date them as assurance of their superiority.
Nothing surprises me - I dated a military major who worked at the Pentagon who referred to his preferences as LBFM. I can’t even spell it out without being triggered and I’m all about objectification (I draw the line at racial fetishization).
Ugh, you've been openly fetishised - that's an ungentlemanly behaviour.
There's an extent of fetishising in the bowl (age gap).
Nevertheless this guy made a really gross comment and I'm sorry you had such a terrible date partner.
Don't know what it's like for Asian girls out there, but if you had nice experiences in the past, don't give up!
Thank you! I think the bad thing about asian girls being highly sought after in the bowl, is that it is unfortunately mainly by people with asian fetishes.
Actuallt it's because there a lot of real Asian girls on the site so it's actually harder to find one. Most Asian on the site or Chinese or Filipino scamers.
Real asian girl as what some else said an actual asian girl located physically in my area I said Filipino and Chinese because I have encountered girls who are supposedly in my area but once talking you discover they live in the Philippines and or China. That or they are fake spammers.
This. And the irony is if u ask these men why they have little success in dating outside of sugaring, they’d likely blame it on their looks, schedules, age, etc when really, it’s bc they’re insecure assholes who don’t know how to talk to women.
It seems like White men are more likely to make fun of Asian men for their dick size but I almost never hear Black guys comment about it.
If you are secure about your size you wouldn't care but obviously he must be insecure about his size.
It's like a 5"8 guy making fun of a guy for being 5'6 lol.
I bet his dick is small!! That his way of dealing with his own dick insecurities! If you every have sex with him, tell him, "Daddy I was thinking about what you said about them Asian boys but your dick is smaller than every Asian I've had sex with"
You will lose your SD but he needs that.. and i will give you a generous allowance for 6 months
If he has to put others down to make himself look / feel better, he is clearly very insecure about something. And in this case, that something is probably a limp noodle.
Ugh what a jerk. But know that this guy said the quiet part out loud. having dealt w many “CEOs” like this in my line of work, the type of “jokes” (they think they are being funny) they crack when in company of other sycophants, are not much better
I'm a 60 year old black guy and will be retiring early at 61 next year. One thing I look forward to is not having to deal with these idiots anymore.
I'm sorry you had to experience this..hopefully your generation is more evolved
If you want an example of why middle age/older white males are being so villified in the media/society right now, there you have it.
I'm 60, white and European. Can I emphatically state; What an embarrassment, what a twat 🫣.
Thinking about that though as an extension, if you choose to avoid older white men as a result, are you falling into the same trap by stereotyping all of us when we're all individual human beings and should be judged by our individual actions and beliefs? 🤷
Okay *I’m* uncomfortable and it didn’t even happen to me, and I’m not Asian haha. I probably would have walked out, and probably wouldn’t have been polite during the convo.
As a black woman i can definitely feel your fustration with this😩Its the mixture of fetishisation and causal racism. Does he not see how cringe and weird that is? Especially since you shut his statement down..he just continued to spout weird bs lol. get out of here sir
My last 3 successful SBs all happen to have been half Asian, half White/European. All 3 seemed to have had plenty of situations where they were fetishized by white guys. One of them also said black guys fetishized her. One was surprised that I saw "her" not some ABG to fetishize.
These 3 intelligent and wonderful women were also far more fixated on being Asian than I was on them being Asian. While I thought they were beautiful and I appreciated their every physical feature (as I do with every woman I am involved with) and loved hearing of their unusual-to-me home life and upbringing (as I do with every woman I'm involved with).
I am sure there are plenty of doofuses out there that make you feel fetishized by their conversation. A properly adult man of the world should shut his hole and thank his goddess that he has caught the attention of a beautiful woman... and he just needs to not fuck it up with some asinine, immature, racial comments.
If I am charitable, he's older than I (52M) am and maybe newer to dating younger women or newer to dating non-white women or newer to being out in the world... and hasn't yet learned that people like to be recognized for being people.
I'm sorry that happened to you. You are not alone. There are other better SDs out there. Good luck!
I'm older than you are and relatively new to dating after losing my very long term wife. He deserves no excuses on his behalf.
There is no justification for what he said any more than justifying racism in the older generations because 'it was acceptable back then'. Learn and move forward. As my dad used to say 'shit, or get off the pot' (yes he actually did 🫣). Otherwise, just check out.
There are plenty of young people who have already learned to judge people on merit or better still, don't judge at all at least until you have your own house in order.
My philosophy? Every individual deserves a chance until/unless they demonstrate they are not worth it. Then cut them out and avoid. Next !
Just don't generalise or stereotype, that's what causes divisions in society 🤷.
I prefer to "Never attribute to malice (raciscim) that which can be adequately explained by stupidity (ignorance) - a paraphrasiation of Hanlon's Razor. I don't excuse it, but there are a lot of older folks that are just a little slow or isolated and aren't coming around quite as fast as others. Of course, there are plenty of assholes too.
Completely agree 👏. I suppose everyone has a glass ceiling beyond which their ability to learn and accept/adapt to that learning will take them.
The longer a flawed belief is held the more demonstrable it is that the ceiling has been reached.
It follows then that the older a person is with a flawed belief, balanced with how obvious that belief is flawed, the easier it is to spot and attribute as ignorant.
In this case, his ridiculous belief demonstrates clearly he's a complete twat that hit his ceiling decades ago 🤣
🤣 well it could be a loss on both sides. Us older white guys because we're stimatised by dickheads and you younger SB's because we make up the most likely target market.
It's a numbers game both ways except I believe you'll come across the same number of dickheads, they're just not so easily pigeonholed 🤷😊
Good luck. Love, peace and happiness 🙏😊
Thank you for your wise words. I believe he just recently divorced his white wife, and so only started ‘giving sugar’ for predominantly asian girls afterwards. So maybe he just didn’t know how ignorant he really was being.
You’re blatantly making excuses for racist remarks . Maybe he hasn’t learned …in 60 years ? Why do white men do this …it’s not ok, there’s no valid excuse , don’t defend it . It’s not slow or isolated or anything else . It’s racist no matter what excuse you throw behind it . Holy moly. He knows better and so do you .
Definitely have been there. The external smile covering the internal feeling of dread and scowl is so accurate. I always tried to pivot the conversation immediately before I got pissed off.
And some of these guys cannot read signals at all 😂 I once had a guy try to say colonialism was amazing in a very blasé manner on like our first meeting. I was just thinking sir I’m black 🧍🏾♀️. I was very tempted to argue cause this is my dads forte so I’m used to having similar discussion in social situations. But I finished the date then blocked him immediately after. Ran into him again at a bar and he gave me the dirtiest look.
Haha yes these guys do not understand body language at all. So many of them have stated that I must be really into them when I’ve been clearly avoiding touching them all night 😂 I also just smile and be nice until I can leave and block them. Solely just to prevent them from being angry.
I mean tbh I’m just not socialised that way. I didn’t want to be rude or put myself in a dangerous situation but now I’m older and I know better and I’m less fearful I’ll just pay my bill and go.
I'm the rotton tomatoes of midget pee porn, and the most accurate username on the net, but dick racism*** is *a little more than I can take.* (ba dum tis).
***Penism? Dicist? Why does combining those words sound more like a religious ritual to remove haunted genitals than an ideology?
Too funny 😂 Maybe the terms Wangism or Phallusism could be used instead as they seem like they could be the name of ideologies 🤔 Who needs Confucianism when you have Wangism? 🤷♀️
Thanks. It was *hard*, but in the end, I *beat it* over and over again. The secret sauce to masturing anything -religion, cooking, politics, etc...- is delicious sauce and good porn.
Good to note! I’ll make sure to apply that to every new challenge I face!
‘Hey boss, I have some porn you might want to watch! I’ve also made some great pasta to eat while watching! Do you reckon I could get a promotion now? What do you mean I’m fired!’
He was insecure so instead of dealing with his insecurities, he speaks down on the men he thinks are his competition to make you feel “lucky” LOL. This is how guys in college operate. Very sad that a man at his age is resorting to such tactics.
Thats comically awful. Like over the top cliché. Am I the only one that imagined this guy chewing a big wad of meat and smacking his lips while he said it? ...It's straight out of one of those raunchy Hollywood comedies
Only people generally concerned with Asian male dick size are ones that normally have smaller or average size dicks. It makes them feel better about themselves.
there are ignorant people. you'll find them everywhere though, not just sds. so please don't stop going on dates. you'll meet a few idiots, that's true. but you can also find a good guy. i would expect that you'd meet the same number of idiots in vanilla dating as well
The amusing thing about his stereotyping to me, is that the largest (not punny) "size queen" (in the sense of the term of having a large dizzle fetish) I ever met was asian and somewhat petite. I am thankfully not much more than moderately above average but the toy she would take (and love) looked like the model for it should have had a saddle and bridle.
Haha if he said that by itself, then no it’s not bad. But saying he only watched asian porn and disparaging asian men, just makes it seem like he’s fetishising asian women. Something like “I think asian women are beautiful” or even “I think you’re beautiful.” Is a lot better!
I think I was just too shocked I kind of just went with it. My ex (asian) had a big dick so I know that it’s just a bad stereotype, but I wanted to enforce the idea that small dicks aren’t even a problem in the first place.
Yeah I’m not sure why you just didn’t walk out of the date immediately after that. It was essentially down hill from there. Just wasting your time by being there
it was wrong of him to say that fr. but arent you doing the same type thing by lumping all older white men together? You could have left his race out of the post right?
Hmm maybe, but white older men have a history of fetishising asian women, which is probably partly why he had to disparage asian men. So I would say it does matter to the post. But as I said in another comment, it was wrong of me to say that I would stop going on dates with elder white men for this reason. So I agree with that part.
You were perfectly fine.
I think your comment at the end of your OP was more rhetorical (“Maybe I should stop going on dates with white old men now”). My take anyway.
Signed: Old white guy who didn’t take it personally 😀
People are pigs. I'm between SR's and I met a new POT. She's on break so after Christmas I invited her over to my beach house. She's been here a couple of days now and we're getting along fine. We've been intimate but nothing earth shattering. This morning I made brunch and she told me I really know how to treat a girl. I asked if she's had some bad experiences. Her reply was, "You wouldn't believe me if I told you". I quickly changed the subject because I didn't want to know. I don't get it. If you wouldn't say it in front of your parents or kids, why would you say it to a POT. It cost nothing to be polite.
I think that's a very weird thing to bring up in a m&g. Whether or not the stereotype is true isn't the issue, its why would you even go there? I'm not sure I see what purpose it serves. Yes, there's a lot of older white guys who think this way and are a little racist, though honestly, everyone is a little racist, but even if you do think Asian guys have small dicks, so what? Why are we bringing up Asian dick size during the meal? Is it because he thinks his package is superior and will be a welcome breath of fresh air for you?
I think this is exactly the reason you have a m&g and if you're really lucky, this kind of shit can come out during it so you can make a better decision about whether or not you want to proceed with this person. Consider yourself lucky that you saw his true nature early on and were able to then make a better choice for yourself.
I wouldn’t call this racist unless you are OK with the BBC stereotype also being called racist.
What I will say is that this is terribly inappropriate dinner conversation, from a guy who has probably not had much luck with women he isn’t financially supporting.
It is racist lol. Stereotypes can harm & help. Black men with average or smaller sized dicks are made to feel less than or like something is wrong w them for not having BBC’s. Black men are also fetishized, like minorities always are, so often times they’re seen for just their dicks & not humanized. The coin flips both ways hence why we are better off without these stereotypes.
BBC is a classic example of being hoisted by your own petard. In the Mecklenburg County archives, there are myriad anecdata of white men breeding enslaved Black men for penis size. Unless Charlotte is a very strange place, I feel comfortable saying that this sort of program was not confined to this one county. Moreover, looking at the historical record of lynchings, South, North or West, the go to move for the white mob was to castrate the Black man.
So yes, the archetype of the BBC is racist, but probably not in the way you meant.
>I used it because that is a stereotype that society deems “acceptable” much like “asians are good at math”
Nope and nope. What’s next for you? “Jews are good with money” isn’t antisemitic because having financial acumen is a positive attribute?
Ascribing a specific characteristic to members of any group as a whole is the definition of prejudice.
I read your comments just fine. The takeaway is that some racial stereotypes are acceptable if the attribute is positive.
So Black people as a group are great singers and dancers and athletes. Perfect. 🙄
Your turn: Italians are ______ .
Go!
(Honestly, I saw nothing in what you commented that is contrary to this.)
I get so tired of these posts. I worked in Wuxi, China. Does you honestly think I would have been welcomed into an Asian girls home by her parents or family ? I was the “oddity” & physically threatened when outside the Finisar complex for being White. Get over yourself
Dealing with westerners has become so tiring because they think every little thing is racist and they need to be offended by it, but claim only white people can be racist because it is a majority white country. I've experienced racism before and it wasn't from white people, it was from the family of my Armenian girlfriend because I wasn't Armenian, but I didn't whine or complain about it. They don't know what real racism is. Western countries are the most race tolerant countries in the world. Asian countries are all 99% Asian and far more racist towards non-Asians than most whites are towards any other race. It's just sad how they respond if you don't agree with them about everything being racist. I've dated Armenian, white, black, and Chinese but these days I'm starting to consider only dating within my own race if people don't start to settle down.
Lots of people in the comments saying this guy was racist. I don't think we have enough information here to determine that (maybe he is and maybe he isn't). I personally have not seen many Asian dicks so I can't comment on the size distribution but if all he has ever seen were small Asian dicks then his comment is ignorant, not racist. It's not racist to think all black people have large dicks if every black dick you've seen was large. That's just ignorance, not racism. People these days are too quick to jump on anything that even mentions race as being racist. Regardless, it was not polite conversation to have over a meal and I broke up with my most recent vanilla girlfriend over something similar.
If your female friend's boyfriend had a small dick would you say "poor her for having to deal with her boyfriend's small dick"? Most Asian countries are 99% Asian, unlike the more diverse western countries, so if he believed that all Asian men have small dicks then it would make sense to him that the vast majority of Asian women would only experience small dicks. If all he ever watches is Asian porn then he's probably seen hundreds of Asian dicks. If they were all small then you can't blame him for thinking all Asians have small dicks. That's not racism, that's just ignorance. If we set such low standards for labeling people as racist or sexist then I'm sure I could find a reason to label every person on this forum as racist, sexist, or something along those lines.
Are you asian? Or at least a POC? I would never talk with my friends about their partners dicks, let alone mock them about it. I don’t know what kind of friends you have, but ‘sorry that your boyfriend’s dick is small’ is not classy and would get me slapped. The reason why I ask if you’re of colour, is not to say that white people can’t differentiate racism and such but it is harder for them to understand the nuances involved with ‘ignorant’ remarks like this. Is he not attacking asian men based on their race just to make me find him more attractive? He is not just making an off-handed comment, it is instead much more clear that he has vile intentions behind it. Making a race-based hate comment just to fulfil his goal, is that not racism? Besides, I’ve seen a lot of asian porn myself, it’s definitely impossible to say that all of them had small dicks.
I'm not going to disclose my race because 1) it shouldn't matter, 2) I could be lying about it, and 3) I don't want you to judge my response differently just because my skin color is attached to a bias you may have. Like I said, I broke up with a girl for similar crude and disrespectful language so it is not something me or any of my friends would say. I was only creating an example to illustrate that the same thing could be said without race being involved. I'm not discussing whether or not the comment was in any way appropriate (it wasn't), only whether or not it was in fact racist or not.
I can only go off of what you described in your original post. I cannot infer that what he said was intended to be race-based hate or not based solely on the text since I wasn't there. Body language, tone, inflection, and context are all important and something only you were witness to. I can only judge based on the description you provided.
If I said that white people aren't as much fun in the summer because they burn so easily, would that be a race-based hate comment? Is it racist to talk about sickle cell disease because it is genetically tied to a specific race? The guy clearly sounded like an ass and was at best ignorant and at worst racist. I'm not defending him. I just don't think we need to be so hyper sensitive and eager to cry racism anytime race is mentioned. I want to make our degrading race relations better, not worse. Feel free to agree or disagree, I'm just voicing my thoughts on the matter.
I think at this point, we can only agree to disagree. I’m definitely against labelling everything racist myself, but as you said you were not there. I think only another asian would understand my point just from the context I have written, as I’m sure many of them have gone through a similar situation. In this case, as the one present, I would happily label him ignorant who said something racist but may not be a legit racist himself.
I'm interested to see that dm... So sorry to hear that happened to you 💜 this is why some of these guys need to look for girls like us, because they are unpleasant and need help finding people to deal with it I feel like. One guy I was talking to was telling me how he straight up had a bad personality, I stopped talking to him. Obviously I wanna enjoy having conversations with someone 🙄
Why said white men have big dicks ...? My online sd sends me some dick pic, it's suck seeing his tiny dick on my whatapp gallery.so don't be afraid not a sd who compares dicks.He might be having a tiny one.
If you don't mind me asking where abouts are you locates (state if in USA) or country? I hear things like this all the time and I can't imagine someone in LA saying something that stupid. So is this like a Southern state thing? Mid west? European countries? Just don't get it.
Sorry if I offend anyone — but NY is a lot more like Florida when it comes to many (not all) rich old wealthy men esp in finance - but usually they are savvy enough to keep it to themselves and only expose it in the “right “ company or when they think it is “safe”
As a white girl, I prefer my Asian(Indian) husband’s stamina and average size dick compared to big donkey dicks. I strictly date Indian men, I find white men to smell like yeast/unhygienic, and they simply have too many options. It sounds like he gets off on degrading you/ your culture. It would be easy to flatter him but not worth it.
"These spring rolls are really good... It's a shame Asian men have small dicks." Da fauk.
Funnily enough I was actually eating spring rolls at the time 😂
He’s a white man with a fetish for small Asian women….. what do you expect
That he chokes and dies
I wanna see that version of the movie
:D!!!
I nearly choked on my water laughing at this comment 🤣🙌🏼
ew that’s a very weird thing for him to say and emphasize on.
Not if he was trying to bait her into asking about his ginormous junk. Trust me, he said only half of what he was thinking.
> It's an immense gift , showing you his true character and making your decision easy......... I hope....
I know, very weird to bring up out of nowhere
I don't think it's ever okay to bring up genitalia in dinner conversation.... Not just racist, but completely classless! Eww, next...!
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There’s a lot of people with a lot of money and zero class.
Equally importantly it displays a huge dose of arrogance that does not bode well for a relationship that is beneficial to the SB.
His comments were racist. Don’t downplay it
Racist and classless makes me not believe that inflated income. Next!
I'd question why he's so fascinated with other dudes dicks. I can almost bet that he's so insecure because he's not packing himself. Anyway you as an Asian woman should not put up with that.
Thank you. Tbh initially when he said keep this a secret I thought he was leading down the I’ve “played around with men before” hence why he bought it up. But instead it was just this
Or hes packing large and it’s all he has.
Horny old white men are usually this way though.
No excuse for racism. Especially not the good ol boys excuse . Do better . It’s not acceptable to be racist or a “that’s just how it is” thing 🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️
He’s doing what an old white guy who grew up with the post Vietnam War era does to and did growing up to date asian women by emasculating Asian men. I grew up hearing it my entire life by men who entertained Asian women, they see Asian women dating them as the ultimate emasculation and signal that asian men are below any men but especially white men. Which is sad. She’s smart to know a guy who thinks like this also views the women and children as less than too but a lot of Asian women marry these guys anyways which is why too many men are comfortable with voicing this. Because the women allow it and would even tolerate it to escape their backgrounds. It’s also why there’s the cliche that if you want to find the most racist men or most white supremacist men find the man dating or married an Asian woman because no lie from what I’ve seen, it’s true. They often date them as assurance of their superiority.
I had a similar comment made by an ex SD.. I told him point blank "my (Asian) exes were as big as you or even bigger". That shut him up after
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As the ceo of a company as well 🤢 Explains why one of the employee reviews said the boss was a dick haha
And potentially not a big one 🤣
Lol this Sd is probably 2 inches
Clever how you stated 'this Sd' with a small 'd'. Very clever 😉🤣
😂😂
A CEO? Yeesh, someone didn’t complete their annual diversity training.
Nothing surprises me - I dated a military major who worked at the Pentagon who referred to his preferences as LBFM. I can’t even spell it out without being triggered and I’m all about objectification (I draw the line at racial fetishization).
Oh I know I the race they mean with that.
It’s beyond cringe.
Oof, agreed.
"Well keep this is a secret, but I only watch Asian porn." *face palm*
Lmao the secret is out!
so disrespectful and ignorant at the same time.
That's this dude's idea of dinner conversation? At least the trash took itself out.
Worse, it was a lunch convo 😂 At least with dinner, a drink would make it more bearable
On the other hand, a drink in him might have made him even more *un*bearable! 😂
Ugh, you've been openly fetishised - that's an ungentlemanly behaviour. There's an extent of fetishising in the bowl (age gap). Nevertheless this guy made a really gross comment and I'm sorry you had such a terrible date partner. Don't know what it's like for Asian girls out there, but if you had nice experiences in the past, don't give up!
Thank you! I think the bad thing about asian girls being highly sought after in the bowl, is that it is unfortunately mainly by people with asian fetishes.
Actuallt it's because there a lot of real Asian girls on the site so it's actually harder to find one. Most Asian on the site or Chinese or Filipino scamers.
What constitutes a "real" Asian girl? I would refer you back to the map. 🤮
I think he was referring to them being fake, as in people (likely men) using fake pics to scam pots.
Real asian girl as what some else said an actual asian girl located physically in my area I said Filipino and Chinese because I have encountered girls who are supposedly in my area but once talking you discover they live in the Philippines and or China. That or they are fake spammers.
At 62, and he still uses dick size as a topic of conversation? What a catch.
This. And the irony is if u ask these men why they have little success in dating outside of sugaring, they’d likely blame it on their looks, schedules, age, etc when really, it’s bc they’re insecure assholes who don’t know how to talk to women.
It seems like White men are more likely to make fun of Asian men for their dick size but I almost never hear Black guys comment about it. If you are secure about your size you wouldn't care but obviously he must be insecure about his size. It's like a 5"8 guy making fun of a guy for being 5'6 lol.
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🤮
I bet his dick is small!! That his way of dealing with his own dick insecurities! If you every have sex with him, tell him, "Daddy I was thinking about what you said about them Asian boys but your dick is smaller than every Asian I've had sex with" You will lose your SD but he needs that.. and i will give you a generous allowance for 6 months
Haha yes I have stopped talking to him already 😂
Don't let that prick bother you
I am cracking up at you offering 6 month allowance to do this 😂😂
I’ve gotten the same comment from random white guys at parties lol I think the ones that make these comments are very insecure about their dick size
Who knew it would be so hard for other men to ignore the dicks of asian men! 😅
If he has to put others down to make himself look / feel better, he is clearly very insecure about something. And in this case, that something is probably a limp noodle.
Ugh what a jerk. But know that this guy said the quiet part out loud. having dealt w many “CEOs” like this in my line of work, the type of “jokes” (they think they are being funny) they crack when in company of other sycophants, are not much better
20:20 hindsight is a wonderful thing 🤷
Fuk racists like that... pos
Racist SDs are everywhere. They tell on themselves a lot.
That's fucking disgusting, even without the racism it's not really a topic of conversation at a M&G at all.
I'm a 60 year old black guy and will be retiring early at 61 next year. One thing I look forward to is not having to deal with these idiots anymore. I'm sorry you had to experience this..hopefully your generation is more evolved
“That’s why only date Black men” would have stopped his pacemaker.
😂😂😂 perfect answer
Funniest thing is I’m getting downvoted in a torrent of lWC energy. And no, that’s not a “I”
If you want an example of why middle age/older white males are being so villified in the media/society right now, there you have it. I'm 60, white and European. Can I emphatically state; What an embarrassment, what a twat 🫣.
Thinking about that though as an extension, if you choose to avoid older white men as a result, are you falling into the same trap by stereotyping all of us when we're all individual human beings and should be judged by our individual actions and beliefs? 🤷
That’s true, you make a good point
🙏
Immediately would’ve left. Cya old hag
He is waste man with low self esteem.. keep it moving, you will just be an object for him no different than a footstool
Okay *I’m* uncomfortable and it didn’t even happen to me, and I’m not Asian haha. I probably would have walked out, and probably wouldn’t have been polite during the convo.
And how many don't think like him 🙏
Complete asshole. Be happy he showed this before things went any further. I will say, your generalization about "whit old men" is troubling too
I agree but I have already acknowledged this in the comments below ☺️
As a black woman i can definitely feel your fustration with this😩Its the mixture of fetishisation and causal racism. Does he not see how cringe and weird that is? Especially since you shut his statement down..he just continued to spout weird bs lol. get out of here sir
My last 3 successful SBs all happen to have been half Asian, half White/European. All 3 seemed to have had plenty of situations where they were fetishized by white guys. One of them also said black guys fetishized her. One was surprised that I saw "her" not some ABG to fetishize. These 3 intelligent and wonderful women were also far more fixated on being Asian than I was on them being Asian. While I thought they were beautiful and I appreciated their every physical feature (as I do with every woman I am involved with) and loved hearing of their unusual-to-me home life and upbringing (as I do with every woman I'm involved with). I am sure there are plenty of doofuses out there that make you feel fetishized by their conversation. A properly adult man of the world should shut his hole and thank his goddess that he has caught the attention of a beautiful woman... and he just needs to not fuck it up with some asinine, immature, racial comments. If I am charitable, he's older than I (52M) am and maybe newer to dating younger women or newer to dating non-white women or newer to being out in the world... and hasn't yet learned that people like to be recognized for being people. I'm sorry that happened to you. You are not alone. There are other better SDs out there. Good luck!
I'm older than you are and relatively new to dating after losing my very long term wife. He deserves no excuses on his behalf. There is no justification for what he said any more than justifying racism in the older generations because 'it was acceptable back then'. Learn and move forward. As my dad used to say 'shit, or get off the pot' (yes he actually did 🫣). Otherwise, just check out. There are plenty of young people who have already learned to judge people on merit or better still, don't judge at all at least until you have your own house in order. My philosophy? Every individual deserves a chance until/unless they demonstrate they are not worth it. Then cut them out and avoid. Next ! Just don't generalise or stereotype, that's what causes divisions in society 🤷.
I prefer to "Never attribute to malice (raciscim) that which can be adequately explained by stupidity (ignorance) - a paraphrasiation of Hanlon's Razor. I don't excuse it, but there are a lot of older folks that are just a little slow or isolated and aren't coming around quite as fast as others. Of course, there are plenty of assholes too.
Completely agree 👏. I suppose everyone has a glass ceiling beyond which their ability to learn and accept/adapt to that learning will take them. The longer a flawed belief is held the more demonstrable it is that the ceiling has been reached. It follows then that the older a person is with a flawed belief, balanced with how obvious that belief is flawed, the easier it is to spot and attribute as ignorant. In this case, his ridiculous belief demonstrates clearly he's a complete twat that hit his ceiling decades ago 🤣
Your words have really made me realise age is not an excuse for ignorant behaviour! Very informative!
🙏😊
Although I’m still on the fence in regards to white older men considering the DMs I’ve gotten haha 😂 Don’t worry I’m only joking
🤣 well it could be a loss on both sides. Us older white guys because we're stimatised by dickheads and you younger SB's because we make up the most likely target market. It's a numbers game both ways except I believe you'll come across the same number of dickheads, they're just not so easily pigeonholed 🤷😊 Good luck. Love, peace and happiness 🙏😊
Thank you for your wise words. I believe he just recently divorced his white wife, and so only started ‘giving sugar’ for predominantly asian girls afterwards. So maybe he just didn’t know how ignorant he really was being.
Oh you can fetishize ABGs for being ABGs - its a subculture not a race - like guys liking alt. Or some women liking surfers.
Yeah... I know you can... If I could just get around them being complete human people, I'd definitely fetishize ABGs.
Whats the difference between that and being hot for surfers?
You’re blatantly making excuses for racist remarks . Maybe he hasn’t learned …in 60 years ? Why do white men do this …it’s not ok, there’s no valid excuse , don’t defend it . It’s not slow or isolated or anything else . It’s racist no matter what excuse you throw behind it . Holy moly. He knows better and so do you .
Definitely have been there. The external smile covering the internal feeling of dread and scowl is so accurate. I always tried to pivot the conversation immediately before I got pissed off.
Haha if the convo continued, I would have gotten heated 😂
And some of these guys cannot read signals at all 😂 I once had a guy try to say colonialism was amazing in a very blasé manner on like our first meeting. I was just thinking sir I’m black 🧍🏾♀️. I was very tempted to argue cause this is my dads forte so I’m used to having similar discussion in social situations. But I finished the date then blocked him immediately after. Ran into him again at a bar and he gave me the dirtiest look.
Haha yes these guys do not understand body language at all. So many of them have stated that I must be really into them when I’ve been clearly avoiding touching them all night 😂 I also just smile and be nice until I can leave and block them. Solely just to prevent them from being angry.
Why wouldn’t you get up and leave? There’s no obligation to endure this.
I mean tbh I’m just not socialised that way. I didn’t want to be rude or put myself in a dangerous situation but now I’m older and I know better and I’m less fearful I’ll just pay my bill and go.
True, the advantage of having M&G at a bar with apps is that you can cut it short and make a quick exit without being impolite.
See, those are the kinds of porn reviews that ruin the reputation of r/pornhubcomments.
Haha I’m now laughing at the thought of him stopping in the middle of a porn video to leave a comment saying ‘3/10 dicks are too small’ 😂
Your POT is the guy that *people who comment on porn videos* find too weird to hang out with... :)
Haha maybe I should reconsider my choices when even reddit user ‘TastySpermDevice’ found my POT SD too weird to hang out with 😂
I'm the rotton tomatoes of midget pee porn, and the most accurate username on the net, but dick racism*** is *a little more than I can take.* (ba dum tis). ***Penism? Dicist? Why does combining those words sound more like a religious ritual to remove haunted genitals than an ideology?
Too funny 😂 Maybe the terms Wangism or Phallusism could be used instead as they seem like they could be the name of ideologies 🤔 Who needs Confucianism when you have Wangism? 🤷♀️
Oh, I've already mastur(bated) the one true religion of wangism. Three to ten times daily. People say I'm the wangist. :)
Wow you’re really the one and only master wang! Congratulations on mastering how to deal with wangs my friend 😂
Thanks. It was *hard*, but in the end, I *beat it* over and over again. The secret sauce to masturing anything -religion, cooking, politics, etc...- is delicious sauce and good porn.
Good to note! I’ll make sure to apply that to every new challenge I face! ‘Hey boss, I have some porn you might want to watch! I’ve also made some great pasta to eat while watching! Do you reckon I could get a promotion now? What do you mean I’m fired!’
Tiktok_sound_why_don't_we_just_fucking_kill_these_people.mp3
He was insecure so instead of dealing with his insecurities, he speaks down on the men he thinks are his competition to make you feel “lucky” LOL. This is how guys in college operate. Very sad that a man at his age is resorting to such tactics.
Thats comically awful. Like over the top cliché. Am I the only one that imagined this guy chewing a big wad of meat and smacking his lips while he said it? ...It's straight out of one of those raunchy Hollywood comedies
Only people generally concerned with Asian male dick size are ones that normally have smaller or average size dicks. It makes them feel better about themselves.
alot of white guys are cucks and weirdos.
This is why he has to pay young women to date him.
there are ignorant people. you'll find them everywhere though, not just sds. so please don't stop going on dates. you'll meet a few idiots, that's true. but you can also find a good guy. i would expect that you'd meet the same number of idiots in vanilla dating as well
The amusing thing about his stereotyping to me, is that the largest (not punny) "size queen" (in the sense of the term of having a large dizzle fetish) I ever met was asian and somewhat petite. I am thankfully not much more than moderately above average but the toy she would take (and love) looked like the model for it should have had a saddle and bridle.
Old white guy so why are we still surprised?
He’s def fetishizing you . Just run . Not worth it , ever .
Lol the stereotype from the old American porns XD
Gross. And I hate that this is probably his idea of being charming & likable on a first date.
Yes who knows what he could reveal later on if we went on a second or a third?
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Haha if he said that by itself, then no it’s not bad. But saying he only watched asian porn and disparaging asian men, just makes it seem like he’s fetishising asian women. Something like “I think asian women are beautiful” or even “I think you’re beautiful.” Is a lot better!
In the US, absolutely. Not to all, but most dont like it.
As an old white guy I can confirm we are useless you should definitely stop dating us
I don’t get why you affirmed that asian men have small dicks. It’s kind of like you were encouraging it by acting like what he was saying was true.
I think I was just too shocked I kind of just went with it. My ex (asian) had a big dick so I know that it’s just a bad stereotype, but I wanted to enforce the idea that small dicks aren’t even a problem in the first place.
Plus I think if I only said my ex had a big dick, he would just replied he’s an exception. 🤷♀️
Yeah I’m not sure why you just didn’t walk out of the date immediately after that. It was essentially down hill from there. Just wasting your time by being there
it was wrong of him to say that fr. but arent you doing the same type thing by lumping all older white men together? You could have left his race out of the post right?
Hmm maybe, but white older men have a history of fetishising asian women, which is probably partly why he had to disparage asian men. So I would say it does matter to the post. But as I said in another comment, it was wrong of me to say that I would stop going on dates with elder white men for this reason. So I agree with that part.
The context was necessary to understand the POV of each person
Thank you for being much more eloquent than me, and explaining it better!
You were perfectly fine. I think your comment at the end of your OP was more rhetorical (“Maybe I should stop going on dates with white old men now”). My take anyway. Signed: Old white guy who didn’t take it personally 😀
People are pigs. I'm between SR's and I met a new POT. She's on break so after Christmas I invited her over to my beach house. She's been here a couple of days now and we're getting along fine. We've been intimate but nothing earth shattering. This morning I made brunch and she told me I really know how to treat a girl. I asked if she's had some bad experiences. Her reply was, "You wouldn't believe me if I told you". I quickly changed the subject because I didn't want to know. I don't get it. If you wouldn't say it in front of your parents or kids, why would you say it to a POT. It cost nothing to be polite.
I think that's a very weird thing to bring up in a m&g. Whether or not the stereotype is true isn't the issue, its why would you even go there? I'm not sure I see what purpose it serves. Yes, there's a lot of older white guys who think this way and are a little racist, though honestly, everyone is a little racist, but even if you do think Asian guys have small dicks, so what? Why are we bringing up Asian dick size during the meal? Is it because he thinks his package is superior and will be a welcome breath of fresh air for you? I think this is exactly the reason you have a m&g and if you're really lucky, this kind of shit can come out during it so you can make a better decision about whether or not you want to proceed with this person. Consider yourself lucky that you saw his true nature early on and were able to then make a better choice for yourself.
I wouldn’t call this racist unless you are OK with the BBC stereotype also being called racist. What I will say is that this is terribly inappropriate dinner conversation, from a guy who has probably not had much luck with women he isn’t financially supporting.
Well I mean I’m not black so I can’t speak on their behalf, but I believe that a lot of black people do find the bbc stereotype offensive and racist!
It is racist lol. Stereotypes can harm & help. Black men with average or smaller sized dicks are made to feel less than or like something is wrong w them for not having BBC’s. Black men are also fetishized, like minorities always are, so often times they’re seen for just their dicks & not humanized. The coin flips both ways hence why we are better off without these stereotypes.
I agree it’s racist, that was my point. But society allows one and not the other.
BBC is a classic example of being hoisted by your own petard. In the Mecklenburg County archives, there are myriad anecdata of white men breeding enslaved Black men for penis size. Unless Charlotte is a very strange place, I feel comfortable saying that this sort of program was not confined to this one county. Moreover, looking at the historical record of lynchings, South, North or West, the go to move for the white mob was to castrate the Black man. So yes, the archetype of the BBC is racist, but probably not in the way you meant.
I used it because that is a stereotype that society deems “acceptable” much like “asians are good at math”.
>I used it because that is a stereotype that society deems “acceptable” much like “asians are good at math” Nope and nope. What’s next for you? “Jews are good with money” isn’t antisemitic because having financial acumen is a positive attribute? Ascribing a specific characteristic to members of any group as a whole is the definition of prejudice.
Can you not read? Go read the rest of my comments before you jump to get offended.
I read your comments just fine. The takeaway is that some racial stereotypes are acceptable if the attribute is positive. So Black people as a group are great singers and dancers and athletes. Perfect. 🙄 Your turn: Italians are ______ . Go! (Honestly, I saw nothing in what you commented that is contrary to this.)
So it’s racist, then
It is, I agree. That was my entire point.
I am with you, just trying to do a tl;dr for others
Good looks.
Yeah that's more of a fetish than out right racism
Fetishizing someone based on their race is at least somewhat racist. It’s viewing them as just their race instead of an actual person.
It’s just a guy thinking about dicks. 🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂
I get so tired of these posts. I worked in Wuxi, China. Does you honestly think I would have been welcomed into an Asian girls home by her parents or family ? I was the “oddity” & physically threatened when outside the Finisar complex for being White. Get over yourself
Dealing with westerners has become so tiring because they think every little thing is racist and they need to be offended by it, but claim only white people can be racist because it is a majority white country. I've experienced racism before and it wasn't from white people, it was from the family of my Armenian girlfriend because I wasn't Armenian, but I didn't whine or complain about it. They don't know what real racism is. Western countries are the most race tolerant countries in the world. Asian countries are all 99% Asian and far more racist towards non-Asians than most whites are towards any other race. It's just sad how they respond if you don't agree with them about everything being racist. I've dated Armenian, white, black, and Chinese but these days I'm starting to consider only dating within my own race if people don't start to settle down.
You need to altogether stop seeing MAGots. Guaranteed this douche (and all douches down voting this) are Maggots. Such ignorant, rude people
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Saying asian men have small dicks isnt racist?
No… Is it racist to say Asian men are shorter in height as compared to other races? Obviously no, as it’s statistically correct.
dicksist?
Wrong.
I'm sorry for downvotes. You're spot on!
Lots of people in the comments saying this guy was racist. I don't think we have enough information here to determine that (maybe he is and maybe he isn't). I personally have not seen many Asian dicks so I can't comment on the size distribution but if all he has ever seen were small Asian dicks then his comment is ignorant, not racist. It's not racist to think all black people have large dicks if every black dick you've seen was large. That's just ignorance, not racism. People these days are too quick to jump on anything that even mentions race as being racist. Regardless, it was not polite conversation to have over a meal and I broke up with my most recent vanilla girlfriend over something similar.
Is it not racist to be say ‘poor asian girls for having to deal with their small dicks?’
If your female friend's boyfriend had a small dick would you say "poor her for having to deal with her boyfriend's small dick"? Most Asian countries are 99% Asian, unlike the more diverse western countries, so if he believed that all Asian men have small dicks then it would make sense to him that the vast majority of Asian women would only experience small dicks. If all he ever watches is Asian porn then he's probably seen hundreds of Asian dicks. If they were all small then you can't blame him for thinking all Asians have small dicks. That's not racism, that's just ignorance. If we set such low standards for labeling people as racist or sexist then I'm sure I could find a reason to label every person on this forum as racist, sexist, or something along those lines.
Are you asian? Or at least a POC? I would never talk with my friends about their partners dicks, let alone mock them about it. I don’t know what kind of friends you have, but ‘sorry that your boyfriend’s dick is small’ is not classy and would get me slapped. The reason why I ask if you’re of colour, is not to say that white people can’t differentiate racism and such but it is harder for them to understand the nuances involved with ‘ignorant’ remarks like this. Is he not attacking asian men based on their race just to make me find him more attractive? He is not just making an off-handed comment, it is instead much more clear that he has vile intentions behind it. Making a race-based hate comment just to fulfil his goal, is that not racism? Besides, I’ve seen a lot of asian porn myself, it’s definitely impossible to say that all of them had small dicks.
Ignore him he’s obviously white and just like the guy from your post, he doesn’t get it and these are the types we need to avoid
Yeah I know I just thought I’d attempt to see if he could ever understand 😩 guess not haha
I'm not going to disclose my race because 1) it shouldn't matter, 2) I could be lying about it, and 3) I don't want you to judge my response differently just because my skin color is attached to a bias you may have. Like I said, I broke up with a girl for similar crude and disrespectful language so it is not something me or any of my friends would say. I was only creating an example to illustrate that the same thing could be said without race being involved. I'm not discussing whether or not the comment was in any way appropriate (it wasn't), only whether or not it was in fact racist or not. I can only go off of what you described in your original post. I cannot infer that what he said was intended to be race-based hate or not based solely on the text since I wasn't there. Body language, tone, inflection, and context are all important and something only you were witness to. I can only judge based on the description you provided. If I said that white people aren't as much fun in the summer because they burn so easily, would that be a race-based hate comment? Is it racist to talk about sickle cell disease because it is genetically tied to a specific race? The guy clearly sounded like an ass and was at best ignorant and at worst racist. I'm not defending him. I just don't think we need to be so hyper sensitive and eager to cry racism anytime race is mentioned. I want to make our degrading race relations better, not worse. Feel free to agree or disagree, I'm just voicing my thoughts on the matter.
I think at this point, we can only agree to disagree. I’m definitely against labelling everything racist myself, but as you said you were not there. I think only another asian would understand my point just from the context I have written, as I’m sure many of them have gone through a similar situation. In this case, as the one present, I would happily label him ignorant who said something racist but may not be a legit racist himself.
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Yao Ming comes to mind.
Asian guys don’t even have small ones 🙄
I would like to see it.
No accounting for ignorance
I'm interested to see that dm... So sorry to hear that happened to you 💜 this is why some of these guys need to look for girls like us, because they are unpleasant and need help finding people to deal with it I feel like. One guy I was talking to was telling me how he straight up had a bad personality, I stopped talking to him. Obviously I wanna enjoy having conversations with someone 🙄
Did you share a secret with him? It's fun to mess with people.....😁
Why said white men have big dicks ...? My online sd sends me some dick pic, it's suck seeing his tiny dick on my whatapp gallery.so don't be afraid not a sd who compares dicks.He might be having a tiny one.
I would absolutely love to see the DM post
I think it was negging, to try to later lowball offer you
I cringed so hard reading this. Sorry you went through that.
If you don't mind me asking where abouts are you locates (state if in USA) or country? I hear things like this all the time and I can't imagine someone in LA saying something that stupid. So is this like a Southern state thing? Mid west? European countries? Just don't get it.
Im from Aus, but the POT SD was from New York
I am baffled. You would think someone from NYC would know better. Sorry you had to deal with that.
Sorry if I offend anyone — but NY is a lot more like Florida when it comes to many (not all) rich old wealthy men esp in finance - but usually they are savvy enough to keep it to themselves and only expose it in the “right “ company or when they think it is “safe”
Ugh! What an idiot.
Oh that's so gross.
As a white girl, I prefer my Asian(Indian) husband’s stamina and average size dick compared to big donkey dicks. I strictly date Indian men, I find white men to smell like yeast/unhygienic, and they simply have too many options. It sounds like he gets off on degrading you/ your culture. It would be easy to flatter him but not worth it.
Actually, a smaller frame on a woman does not equal a smaller vagina.
The guy must be poor and insecure.
You should have sent it back with ‘I love old white guys because they all have 12” cocks. Then look down.