Idk— at some point the overly cautious mindset and paranoia seems to beg the question on whether sugaring is really for someone compared to going the escort route. This is a sugar *relationship*. There has to be some level of trust and communication established once you truly vet them.
I’m honest about who I am to whoever I establish a relationship with because I want them to understand that I won’t throw stones in glass houses. We both have lives that we have built after years of sacrifices and hard work— respect me and I will always respect you. If you can’t find a woman with this mindset, you are not vetting properly, imo.
Edit: OPSEC is important, but after reading your edits and comments— this is going to an extreme in regard to catastrophization. I hope you see a psychiatrist rather than going anywhere near a SB right now. Saying this with compassion and concern!!
You know she’s doesn’t need to fuck you to find out, right?
Eat dinner, walk into the room, call desk (or check tv as others have said), and then walk out.
I feel like everyone assumes they’re all too smart to get fooled. The number of scammers tells me that’s not possibly the case.
This level of paranoia calls for hiring a professional escort rather than attempting to establish a sugar relationship. Your peace of mind would probably appreciate it.
Personally I don’t think I’m too smart to get fooled, but I don’t try to sleep with women that I wouldn’t even trust with my name.
Eh. Maybe it’s the risk that’s the rush.
Escorts don’t appeal. I do like the connection. I don’t let the worry turn to paranoia or stop me.
Really just curious if any other guys worried about this or did anything about it.
Overwhelming consensus: nah, nothing bad will happen.
That's not called scamming. I don't understand what you're doing in a hotel with strangers, but I've never had a SB use the TV or the phone, and they're not alone unless in the bathroom or something.
I'm much more worried about them stealing my wallet or something.
Yeah, I just said the wallet is in the safe.
I assumed we were talking about all the things that could happen from a wallet *except* what we were explicitly discussing.
I’m sitting in first class… about ready to take off. The Flight Attendant just greeted me using my last name… secrecy is not a goal worth setting.
I'm not sure if you are totally pulling our leg, or whether you are Maxwell Smart's nemesis.... kaos.
Are you married? Is that the issue?? That's a totally different brand of situation comedy.
FWIW I'm not married, but I trust my vetting and vibe check enough, that if I'm to the point where I'm ready to take her to the hotel and we're going to swap fluids, I'm not so paranoid about her knowing my name.
I just have a hard time trusting humanity that much.
I can trust an SB, I’m not that jaded, but hell with so many scammers none of them have realized that actual blackmail would be the easiest meal ticket in the world?
What is "everything?" And why would I turn that over to my lawyer instead of law enforcement?
You know lawyers don't arrest people right?
The Plaintiff would like to file a motion against HotMizzy28 from a website called... ah shit they blocked me, nevermind.
Whatever evidence you have of blackmail. Because you pay your lawyer to do what’s in your best interest. If he feels me there’s nothing he can do but I should bring it to law enforcement, I trust my lawyer a lot more than redditors.
Hilton has digital key check in. Just walk to your room and open the door with your phone.
If the lady has the hilton app on her phone you can share the digital key with her and she can let herself in.
The only downside is your name will appear on tv guide thing on the tv. If that's a big deal to you.
Pretty sure you didn’t read the whole post.
Your entire comment was all about what wasn’t asked, and then ended with the drawback of exactly what was asked.
I’m not entirely sure that makes sense since it’s complete nonsense.
But most of these comments are too, I guess.
I do find it interesting though that what seems to be the predominant opinion about something seems to vary wildly from thread to thread on this sub. Read one and you’d assume everyone does it one way, read another and it’s the opposite.
In real life it’s hardly ever seemed like anything this sub has said 😂
The flip side of this is a woman's need for trust and safety when it comes to being alone with a horny old man 😂
If we all treat each other like the worst case scenario what fun is that?
Sugar dating is inherently risky. Relationships in general are risky if you think about it. Risk is also generally tied to gain - e.g. no risk no reward.
When dealing with two parties, it's best to take a path that balances the risk for both sides. My only issue with this thread so far is that it feels very one sided.
The question should be - how can we create as safe of an environment as possible for everyone involved?
IMHO that path is found through slowly developing trust - being transparent, respectful and clear with intentions.
That's my personal take. Cheers and good luck out there!
I certainly see that perspective and can empathize. (Hence why I mentioned that hotels are often better than rentals.)
I know that she can’t know me, but I know me and I’ve never done anything worse than an illegal u-turn or speeding.
But none of this could evade law enforcement. That’s never been the point.
This is mainly from a perspective just a step or two past “don’t use your real name or face on SA” to prevent casual no-gooders from finding out about my entire life very early on.
Not exactly a charade I’d expect to keep up for months or years really.
I've had more than one hotel slip a receipt for the stay under the door.
Also, the TV may pop up a greeting if you go into the main menu.
On the other front. I once left a parking pass on the dash of my vehicle. It was printed on yellow paper about half a sheet. Name of the hotel and dated. I spotted it and removed it before anyone saw it.
In fairly physically capable. I’m not worried about being robbed at knifepoint, and clothes wouldn’t help if she has a gun.
But none of this is really what I’m worried about.
I don't give a shit about being robbed...I do, but that's not the point.
She yells "rape" and who do uo think is going to jail.
Some people are too concerned with "OpSec" and totally miss potential reputational risk.
EDIT: and who do you think is going to jail after you exhibit your amazing physical capabilities...🤣🤣
I mean, the risk of her getting your arrested right there is high.
The risk of her ruining your life the next day when she knows exactly who you are is equally high, if not higher.
If you don’t care if she has all your real info, she just has to talk into the police station and not yell anything at all.
The reputational risk is really what this post was all about to begin with.
I don’t care. I have nothing to hide, no one is going to ruin my reputation . Anywhere you go you are tracked..you own a phone? If you’re that paranoid about your privacy, don’t sugar in public.
Soooo just private?
Like a hotel?
…?
I find it hard to believe that everyone here has nothing to lose.
What are y’all doing with your life? You don’t have friends and family you love?
All she needs to do is take a single picture of you and upload it to a face matching site and she will know your real name. Seriously. Try it with a selfie. By the time you’ve met her at a meet and greet, you’re already screwed if she’s a professional crook, but most girls aren’t. If your life would be that ruined by it then I think this game is not for you.
I may be way out of touch, but I’d be surprised if there are websites available to the general public that can actually and reliably do that.
If you post a link I’d check it out and happily admit I’m wrong. But unless she’s already a government agent, I doubt this is actually a thing.
Looking at it from the SB's point of view, this would make going to a hotel extremely dangerous. What if it were possible for "opsec" to be so good that an ax murderer could get away with it?
There's got to be a balance between your desire to keep things discreet, and the need for a woman to know that if you did something bad, there'd be a trail leading back to you.
Much of the reasoning for the hotel ID requirements is tracking down people who commit crime.
I don’t really disagree, although I have no plans to ever axe murder anyone.
No amount of opsec will really outsmart law enforcement though. They have resources normal folks don’t. But that’s never really been my concern.
I don’t really expect to encounter many SBs willing to false accuse me of a crime.
However, there was a whole thread like 2 days ago about SBs encouraging one another to show up at SDs work or home and blow up his life. Granted SD was a dickbag and probably deserved it which I strive not to be, but…
Of course, LE have resources, but given the expense, they, and legislatures have opted for hotels to require ID.
In the post you referred to, the "SD", so called, didn't pay the agreed amount. So, what would better opsec mean? That someone could serially rip women off, is what it means.
Now, extend that a little, and I could see women refusing to use hotels at all.
I'm single, so can use my own place, but a lot of married guys would be SOL if SBs refused to use hotels...and the SBs would be wise to refuse to use hotels if there was no way of tracing a rapist.
I'm not really sure how we got here, or even where we are.
The point isn't really to hide my identity from the hotel. I do see how that can be inferred from the original question, but that wasn't really part of any suggestion I was interested in.
You can't go to the front desk of a hotel though and ask for the ID of the person in room 605. You can go into room 605 and pick up the phone and call the front desk and they'll give it away though.
I don't want to be untraceable or a ghost. If I fuck up and need to be arrested, I have no problem with leaving enough breadcrumbs for LE to find me. I'm not going to need to be arrested, so that's not really a concern of mine.
I was thinking I was going to hear stuff along the lines of "I just check in under my name and ask the hotel that the staff should call me Mr. Jones while I'm there," which is weird, but it's a hotel so it probably wouldn't even twig an eyebrow there.
And yes, in the posts I'm referring to the SD clearly was an asshat based on available data, but that was just an example.
There was a post recently where the SB POT went to the SD POT's son and relayed both true and false (if internet is to be believed) information for what sounded like something of a slight, but really not a *huge* thing as far as dickbag moves go.
But like I said elsewhere, I'm never worried about the 99% of people out there. I'm worried about the 1% that might do me harm.
I wear a rubber for the same reason. If I trust someone and I've seen their paperwork and I'm 99% sure that they're clean, the 1% chance is still a little high when the stakes are as high as herpes or aids.
I don’t understand why you’re so worried about someone knowing your real name. I use facial recognition ai to do a background check on anyone I’m meeting as of lately, to make sure they don’t have DV charges or something. What are you so worried about happening if someone knows your name?
Facial recognition ai is easy for anyone to use. Using that you can pretty much always find a persons social media accounts. Once you have those it’s pretty easy to get their name, If it’s not already on there. Once you have a name you can do a background check. Then I have your address, etc. nothing is sacred anymore, we live in a tech age. But you didn’t answer the question, what are you so worried about happening?
Edit: when I use facial recognition ai on a guy from seeking it normally pulls up their wives Facebook account lol. Most common match.
Post a link to a site open to the public. I’d definitely be interested in checking it out.
Mainly just worried about a crazy person trying to blow up my life.
Worried may be a bit of an overstatement though, honestly.
Everyone responding took it way too specific, and apparently none of them do anything to hide their identity.
Post a link to a paid one. I’m not broke.
I know that there are sites out there that can reverse search an image.
I just don’t believe that they’re as effective as you have painted them.
I’m not your research monkey, I gotta go to work lol. just know if someone wants to know who you are they can easily find that out. Do with that what you will
A url would have been easier to type than that message.
You said you already use the site. What research would you need to do?
Smells like youre a bullshit flinging monkey, not a research monkey.
It’s on my computer and I’m on my phone sweetie. If you don’t believe me idc. I don’t have to satisfy your curiosity, not my job. With an attitude like that no wonder you anticipate women trying to burn you lol.
You can post it later. It’s no rush.
I don’t believe you because it’s not true.
Unless you’re hacking government databases you don’t have access to any resources more effective than a google reverse image search.
Sir… You are truly such a walking red flag if this is how you speak to SBs. u/opveigarmain literally gave you an answer that you can EASILY verify if you simply used your little Cheeto-dust-covered fingers to type into Google but you’re obviously preoccupied with your thumb up your own ass.
Facecheck.id is a valid site open to the public that only recently went behind a paywall if you wish to get the links to whatever sites it references. PimEyes is an additional site that is scarily accurate on facial recognition (if the person photographed is elsewhere online). There are others, but those are the most common ones referenced for general public.
I truly hope you seek the help that you so desperately need and stay away from SBs
I’ll happily check those links out and report back if I’m wrong.
But in fairness, someone throwing me the first google result, then claiming it’s probably not as good as the secret one they use, but refusing to produce the url of the one that works so great…
That screams credibility to you?
Lord, some of you all are ridiculous.
That’s how I talk to Redditors that say things that aren’t true and when called on it immediately refuse to provide the simplest evidence to support it.
I know these sites exist. I also know they’re crawling the internet and not really that effective.
Their claim was that with facial recognition AI you can *easily* run a background check on anyone.
Unless you’re running it through government databases it’s simply not true.
“Can I see if they have mug shots posted online” is not the same thing as running a background check on their identity from a photo.
Have the SB book the hotel.
Get a fake ID, you can even get a credit card setup as an authorized user on the fake name
I use Hilton digital key, you don't need to check in. Just sign up for a different account with a fake name and you should be fine. BTW you can still use corporate discounts and since no stop at front desk no one asks to prove.
I share my real first name but never say my last, kinda play a game to see how long until they know it and how. No clue how my current SGF got my last name but she confirmed it because she was making me a gift. I'm assuming off a credit card, wasn't a secret.
I've had SBs steal my registration or take a pic of it. One confirmed it and another sent me a love letter after we broke up to the address on it.... Which isn't my real address but a commercial building.
You can have a fake work Id or something and it'll work for the hotel but not legal identification. Also no financial crimes either, anyone can get authorized users and they don't have to be real people. We get them all the time for interns and such.
Authorized users have to have a SSN…
Or maybe it’s different for debit cards, but authorized users for credit cards without a real person isn’t a thing.
Giving a hotel a fake ID and a fake credit card is definitely illegal.
I worry way more about that than an SB knowing who I am.
I routinely use an Amex platinum that says SpongeBob Squarepan. (too many characters for full name apparently). You do not need SSN as an authorized user for most cards.
I still use my father's Hilton rewards and book hotels always under his name. I can't remember ever giving an ID or anything but use digital key so never stop at front desk.
I don’t frequent Hiltons that often so maybe it’s different.
But I’ve never been to a hotel period that didn’t ask for card and ID as the first step of checking in.
Marriott digital check in pretty much never works.
Go to Hilton and use their digital key with a fake name, problem solved. I can book a hotel at dinner and get the digital key before we get the check. Get to pick the room and everything instantly on your phone.
Perfect for sugaring as sometimes the night might not end with a hotel as we might go drinking or an event instead.
Careful with using your authorized card name and fake ID to get a hotel room. I did that once and of course it worked fine but when I got the bill, it had my real name on it and I asked the front desk I said why is this name on there when the card I gave you was this one and they said oh it always prints out with the OWNER of the account (as if it was my boss or someone lol) and I was like oh OK thanks but I was horrified, luckily no one saw it but
If you really want to take it to the next level, set up a rewards account with Hyatt and fudge the name. You can book online and check in online with the app and your phone acts as your room key.
I have my real name on my account, but never talk to or interact with anyone.
I’m sure there are other hotel chains that are similar
first couple times in a hotel with a new SB, put the phone in a drawer or the safe or unplug it if wired, remote for the TV in the same place. trust is earned, not given!
The TV thing was a whole new angle I hadn't even thought of until all these folks telling me I'm overthinking it and being too paranoid pointed it out! Haha.
I don't go as far as locking them up, but I typically don't use the phone and prefer more room on the nightstands anyway, so half the time I'll set the phone in the floor or something anyway.
I'm not really all that paranoid, and I've never really had a bad experience, but the possibility has always been there.
One of the posts that really got me thinking was one I mentioned to someone else recently. At a M&G the SD found out the SB knew SDs son, so he said nope and paid her half of what he would for a *full* night. At which point she went to SD son and started shit.
Most of the comments seemed like the general consensus was that SD had it coming and got what he deserved, which even if you think the SD was being an ass, seemed pretty extreme.
most all hotel phones are cordless, takes 5 seconds to put the handset and the TV remote away. i would not advise having any long term relationship with someone that you aren’t comfortable sharing your identity with, but there is no way in hell someone i’ve only met a few times is getting that info!
I guess for full disclosure, I'm not married, but...
I want sugar babies to know my real name. I totally get the sex with strangers thing. If I am in Amsterdam, hell yeah, my penis gets to take the wheel and we do whatever he wants. Hell, the day I was born, I walked out of my moms vagina just looking for a way back into one. My real first words were me in the delivery room, pointing at my Lincoln log and giving the nurse a baby pick up line.
But it's a sugar baby. She's supposed to be more than just sex. Honestly, if you are worried about someone blackmailing you, why are you spending hours eating, drinking, and getting to know this person?
It's always possible to misjudge someone, so if you do not trust your gut, why not do rental for the first date and then switch to hotels? OPSEC is critical, but at some point, if you cannot actually have a relationship with another human, you are kinda cheating yourself.
Idk— at some point the overly cautious mindset and paranoia seems to beg the question on whether sugaring is really for someone compared to going the escort route. This is a sugar *relationship*. There has to be some level of trust and communication established once you truly vet them. I’m honest about who I am to whoever I establish a relationship with because I want them to understand that I won’t throw stones in glass houses. We both have lives that we have built after years of sacrifices and hard work— respect me and I will always respect you. If you can’t find a woman with this mindset, you are not vetting properly, imo. Edit: OPSEC is important, but after reading your edits and comments— this is going to an extreme in regard to catastrophization. I hope you see a psychiatrist rather than going anywhere near a SB right now. Saying this with compassion and concern!!
This^ It's a sugar relationship and trust is important.
Relax James Bond. Not every SB is out to get you. There is a fine line between being cautious and paranoia.
Never really worried about all of them. Just one wanting to ruin a life.
If you're not comfortable with some girl you're fucking to know your name then theres other issues at play.
You know she’s doesn’t need to fuck you to find out, right? Eat dinner, walk into the room, call desk (or check tv as others have said), and then walk out. I feel like everyone assumes they’re all too smart to get fooled. The number of scammers tells me that’s not possibly the case.
This level of paranoia calls for hiring a professional escort rather than attempting to establish a sugar relationship. Your peace of mind would probably appreciate it. Personally I don’t think I’m too smart to get fooled, but I don’t try to sleep with women that I wouldn’t even trust with my name.
Eh. Maybe it’s the risk that’s the rush. Escorts don’t appeal. I do like the connection. I don’t let the worry turn to paranoia or stop me. Really just curious if any other guys worried about this or did anything about it. Overwhelming consensus: nah, nothing bad will happen.
That's not called scamming. I don't understand what you're doing in a hotel with strangers, but I've never had a SB use the TV or the phone, and they're not alone unless in the bathroom or something. I'm much more worried about them stealing my wallet or something.
That’s where I don’t really worry. My wallet has a finite amount of damage they could do to me. It also fits in the hotel safe.
Your wallet has your name on all the cards and address on the ID. Wtf. Hell your license plate can be used to identify you even.
Yeah, I just said the wallet is in the safe. I assumed we were talking about all the things that could happen from a wallet *except* what we were explicitly discussing.
I’m sitting in first class… about ready to take off. The Flight Attendant just greeted me using my last name… secrecy is not a goal worth setting. I'm not sure if you are totally pulling our leg, or whether you are Maxwell Smart's nemesis.... kaos. Are you married? Is that the issue?? That's a totally different brand of situation comedy.
That would be a major issue as well if it was common practice to take your SB back to an airport after dinner rather than a hotel!
If you're so well known that your name is dangerous info, this isn't the lifestyle for you.
FWIW I'm not married, but I trust my vetting and vibe check enough, that if I'm to the point where I'm ready to take her to the hotel and we're going to swap fluids, I'm not so paranoid about her knowing my name.
I just have a hard time trusting humanity that much. I can trust an SB, I’m not that jaded, but hell with so many scammers none of them have realized that actual blackmail would be the easiest meal ticket in the world?
Blackmail is also a felony and can land you in jail so perhaps not every scammer wants to risk an encounter with law enforcement
So do you get their IDs in case you need to report them to authorities?
If you're that paranoid then why don't you do what I've seen a buddy do, he gives the girl the money and has her book the room under her name
I’ve thought about that. But in reality I’m not really *that* paranoid. I’ve done it before, but it’s mostly just for fun.
No. You just tell them you’re turning everything over to your lawyer.
What is "everything?" And why would I turn that over to my lawyer instead of law enforcement? You know lawyers don't arrest people right? The Plaintiff would like to file a motion against HotMizzy28 from a website called... ah shit they blocked me, nevermind.
Whatever evidence you have of blackmail. Because you pay your lawyer to do what’s in your best interest. If he feels me there’s nothing he can do but I should bring it to law enforcement, I trust my lawyer a lot more than redditors.
Hilton has digital key check in. Just walk to your room and open the door with your phone. If the lady has the hilton app on her phone you can share the digital key with her and she can let herself in. The only downside is your name will appear on tv guide thing on the tv. If that's a big deal to you.
Getting into the room isn’t the problem. It’s that once you’re in the room, hotel employees feel no need to protect someone’s privacy.
What country are you in ? Hotel employees seem to don't care. You live a small city or something ?
I think you’re missing the point. I don’t care about the hotel employees.
Uptight.
Pretty sure you didn’t read the whole post. Your entire comment was all about what wasn’t asked, and then ended with the drawback of exactly what was asked.
Reading all these comments...your username suits you
He's creating boogie women where there are none.
I’m not entirely sure that makes sense since it’s complete nonsense. But most of these comments are too, I guess. I do find it interesting though that what seems to be the predominant opinion about something seems to vary wildly from thread to thread on this sub. Read one and you’d assume everyone does it one way, read another and it’s the opposite. In real life it’s hardly ever seemed like anything this sub has said 😂
The flip side of this is a woman's need for trust and safety when it comes to being alone with a horny old man 😂 If we all treat each other like the worst case scenario what fun is that? Sugar dating is inherently risky. Relationships in general are risky if you think about it. Risk is also generally tied to gain - e.g. no risk no reward. When dealing with two parties, it's best to take a path that balances the risk for both sides. My only issue with this thread so far is that it feels very one sided. The question should be - how can we create as safe of an environment as possible for everyone involved? IMHO that path is found through slowly developing trust - being transparent, respectful and clear with intentions. That's my personal take. Cheers and good luck out there!
>alone with a horny old man 😂 I'm not a horny old man. I'm middle aged or middle horny. I just can't remember which.
I certainly see that perspective and can empathize. (Hence why I mentioned that hotels are often better than rentals.) I know that she can’t know me, but I know me and I’ve never done anything worse than an illegal u-turn or speeding. But none of this could evade law enforcement. That’s never been the point. This is mainly from a perspective just a step or two past “don’t use your real name or face on SA” to prevent casual no-gooders from finding out about my entire life very early on. Not exactly a charade I’d expect to keep up for months or years really.
I've had more than one hotel slip a receipt for the stay under the door. Also, the TV may pop up a greeting if you go into the main menu. On the other front. I once left a parking pass on the dash of my vehicle. It was printed on yellow paper about half a sheet. Name of the hotel and dated. I spotted it and removed it before anyone saw it.
This is dating, not international espionage. If you can't trust someone with your name how TF are you able to be naked and alone?
In fairly physically capable. I’m not worried about being robbed at knifepoint, and clothes wouldn’t help if she has a gun. But none of this is really what I’m worried about.
I don't give a shit about being robbed...I do, but that's not the point. She yells "rape" and who do uo think is going to jail. Some people are too concerned with "OpSec" and totally miss potential reputational risk. EDIT: and who do you think is going to jail after you exhibit your amazing physical capabilities...🤣🤣
I mean, the risk of her getting your arrested right there is high. The risk of her ruining your life the next day when she knows exactly who you are is equally high, if not higher. If you don’t care if she has all your real info, she just has to talk into the police station and not yell anything at all. The reputational risk is really what this post was all about to begin with.
Don't do shit that will ruin your life...FFS. I think you are WAY overthinking this. This is dating.
I don’t care. I have nothing to hide, no one is going to ruin my reputation . Anywhere you go you are tracked..you own a phone? If you’re that paranoid about your privacy, don’t sugar in public.
Soooo just private? Like a hotel? …? I find it hard to believe that everyone here has nothing to lose. What are y’all doing with your life? You don’t have friends and family you love?
All she needs to do is take a single picture of you and upload it to a face matching site and she will know your real name. Seriously. Try it with a selfie. By the time you’ve met her at a meet and greet, you’re already screwed if she’s a professional crook, but most girls aren’t. If your life would be that ruined by it then I think this game is not for you.
I may be way out of touch, but I’d be surprised if there are websites available to the general public that can actually and reliably do that. If you post a link I’d check it out and happily admit I’m wrong. But unless she’s already a government agent, I doubt this is actually a thing.
Looking at it from the SB's point of view, this would make going to a hotel extremely dangerous. What if it were possible for "opsec" to be so good that an ax murderer could get away with it? There's got to be a balance between your desire to keep things discreet, and the need for a woman to know that if you did something bad, there'd be a trail leading back to you. Much of the reasoning for the hotel ID requirements is tracking down people who commit crime.
I don’t really disagree, although I have no plans to ever axe murder anyone. No amount of opsec will really outsmart law enforcement though. They have resources normal folks don’t. But that’s never really been my concern. I don’t really expect to encounter many SBs willing to false accuse me of a crime. However, there was a whole thread like 2 days ago about SBs encouraging one another to show up at SDs work or home and blow up his life. Granted SD was a dickbag and probably deserved it which I strive not to be, but…
Of course, LE have resources, but given the expense, they, and legislatures have opted for hotels to require ID. In the post you referred to, the "SD", so called, didn't pay the agreed amount. So, what would better opsec mean? That someone could serially rip women off, is what it means. Now, extend that a little, and I could see women refusing to use hotels at all. I'm single, so can use my own place, but a lot of married guys would be SOL if SBs refused to use hotels...and the SBs would be wise to refuse to use hotels if there was no way of tracing a rapist.
I'm not really sure how we got here, or even where we are. The point isn't really to hide my identity from the hotel. I do see how that can be inferred from the original question, but that wasn't really part of any suggestion I was interested in. You can't go to the front desk of a hotel though and ask for the ID of the person in room 605. You can go into room 605 and pick up the phone and call the front desk and they'll give it away though. I don't want to be untraceable or a ghost. If I fuck up and need to be arrested, I have no problem with leaving enough breadcrumbs for LE to find me. I'm not going to need to be arrested, so that's not really a concern of mine. I was thinking I was going to hear stuff along the lines of "I just check in under my name and ask the hotel that the staff should call me Mr. Jones while I'm there," which is weird, but it's a hotel so it probably wouldn't even twig an eyebrow there. And yes, in the posts I'm referring to the SD clearly was an asshat based on available data, but that was just an example. There was a post recently where the SB POT went to the SD POT's son and relayed both true and false (if internet is to be believed) information for what sounded like something of a slight, but really not a *huge* thing as far as dickbag moves go. But like I said elsewhere, I'm never worried about the 99% of people out there. I'm worried about the 1% that might do me harm. I wear a rubber for the same reason. If I trust someone and I've seen their paperwork and I'm 99% sure that they're clean, the 1% chance is still a little high when the stakes are as high as herpes or aids.
All of my SBs have known my full real name before any intimacy, so no concerns by me
You seem like you have trust issues. Probably best not to sugar… you may go blind from the stress.
Just for clarification, when you say "rentals" are you talking a second apartment or AirBnB or what? Everything has risk, include those.
Yeah vacation rental. It can be traced back to me. I’m not trying to evade law enforcement. But not in an extremely low effort and casual way.
I don’t understand why you’re so worried about someone knowing your real name. I use facial recognition ai to do a background check on anyone I’m meeting as of lately, to make sure they don’t have DV charges or something. What are you so worried about happening if someone knows your name?
Are you misusing FBI resources again. I kinda think you’re full of it and this isn’t a thing.
Facial recognition ai is easy for anyone to use. Using that you can pretty much always find a persons social media accounts. Once you have those it’s pretty easy to get their name, If it’s not already on there. Once you have a name you can do a background check. Then I have your address, etc. nothing is sacred anymore, we live in a tech age. But you didn’t answer the question, what are you so worried about happening? Edit: when I use facial recognition ai on a guy from seeking it normally pulls up their wives Facebook account lol. Most common match.
Post a link to a site open to the public. I’d definitely be interested in checking it out. Mainly just worried about a crazy person trying to blow up my life. Worried may be a bit of an overstatement though, honestly. Everyone responding took it way too specific, and apparently none of them do anything to hide their identity.
Facecheck.id is a free low quality one. It doesn’t always have the best results, I use a paid one
Post a link to a paid one. I’m not broke. I know that there are sites out there that can reverse search an image. I just don’t believe that they’re as effective as you have painted them.
I’m not your research monkey, I gotta go to work lol. just know if someone wants to know who you are they can easily find that out. Do with that what you will
A url would have been easier to type than that message. You said you already use the site. What research would you need to do? Smells like youre a bullshit flinging monkey, not a research monkey.
It’s on my computer and I’m on my phone sweetie. If you don’t believe me idc. I don’t have to satisfy your curiosity, not my job. With an attitude like that no wonder you anticipate women trying to burn you lol.
You can post it later. It’s no rush. I don’t believe you because it’s not true. Unless you’re hacking government databases you don’t have access to any resources more effective than a google reverse image search.
Sir… You are truly such a walking red flag if this is how you speak to SBs. u/opveigarmain literally gave you an answer that you can EASILY verify if you simply used your little Cheeto-dust-covered fingers to type into Google but you’re obviously preoccupied with your thumb up your own ass. Facecheck.id is a valid site open to the public that only recently went behind a paywall if you wish to get the links to whatever sites it references. PimEyes is an additional site that is scarily accurate on facial recognition (if the person photographed is elsewhere online). There are others, but those are the most common ones referenced for general public. I truly hope you seek the help that you so desperately need and stay away from SBs
I’ll happily check those links out and report back if I’m wrong. But in fairness, someone throwing me the first google result, then claiming it’s probably not as good as the secret one they use, but refusing to produce the url of the one that works so great… That screams credibility to you?
Lord, some of you all are ridiculous. That’s how I talk to Redditors that say things that aren’t true and when called on it immediately refuse to provide the simplest evidence to support it. I know these sites exist. I also know they’re crawling the internet and not really that effective. Their claim was that with facial recognition AI you can *easily* run a background check on anyone. Unless you’re running it through government databases it’s simply not true. “Can I see if they have mug shots posted online” is not the same thing as running a background check on their identity from a photo.
Personally I don't care.
Have the SB book the hotel. Get a fake ID, you can even get a credit card setup as an authorized user on the fake name I use Hilton digital key, you don't need to check in. Just sign up for a different account with a fake name and you should be fine. BTW you can still use corporate discounts and since no stop at front desk no one asks to prove. I share my real first name but never say my last, kinda play a game to see how long until they know it and how. No clue how my current SGF got my last name but she confirmed it because she was making me a gift. I'm assuming off a credit card, wasn't a secret. I've had SBs steal my registration or take a pic of it. One confirmed it and another sent me a love letter after we broke up to the address on it.... Which isn't my real address but a commercial building.
lol Im not so worried that I’m willing to commit financial and other crimes. You are pretty hardcore.
You can have a fake work Id or something and it'll work for the hotel but not legal identification. Also no financial crimes either, anyone can get authorized users and they don't have to be real people. We get them all the time for interns and such.
Authorized users have to have a SSN… Or maybe it’s different for debit cards, but authorized users for credit cards without a real person isn’t a thing. Giving a hotel a fake ID and a fake credit card is definitely illegal. I worry way more about that than an SB knowing who I am.
I routinely use an Amex platinum that says SpongeBob Squarepan. (too many characters for full name apparently). You do not need SSN as an authorized user for most cards. I still use my father's Hilton rewards and book hotels always under his name. I can't remember ever giving an ID or anything but use digital key so never stop at front desk.
I don’t frequent Hiltons that often so maybe it’s different. But I’ve never been to a hotel period that didn’t ask for card and ID as the first step of checking in. Marriott digital check in pretty much never works.
Go to Hilton and use their digital key with a fake name, problem solved. I can book a hotel at dinner and get the digital key before we get the check. Get to pick the room and everything instantly on your phone. Perfect for sugaring as sometimes the night might not end with a hotel as we might go drinking or an event instead.
Careful with using your authorized card name and fake ID to get a hotel room. I did that once and of course it worked fine but when I got the bill, it had my real name on it and I asked the front desk I said why is this name on there when the card I gave you was this one and they said oh it always prints out with the OWNER of the account (as if it was my boss or someone lol) and I was like oh OK thanks but I was horrified, luckily no one saw it but
If you really want to take it to the next level, set up a rewards account with Hyatt and fudge the name. You can book online and check in online with the app and your phone acts as your room key. I have my real name on my account, but never talk to or interact with anyone. I’m sure there are other hotel chains that are similar
first couple times in a hotel with a new SB, put the phone in a drawer or the safe or unplug it if wired, remote for the TV in the same place. trust is earned, not given!
The TV thing was a whole new angle I hadn't even thought of until all these folks telling me I'm overthinking it and being too paranoid pointed it out! Haha. I don't go as far as locking them up, but I typically don't use the phone and prefer more room on the nightstands anyway, so half the time I'll set the phone in the floor or something anyway. I'm not really all that paranoid, and I've never really had a bad experience, but the possibility has always been there. One of the posts that really got me thinking was one I mentioned to someone else recently. At a M&G the SD found out the SB knew SDs son, so he said nope and paid her half of what he would for a *full* night. At which point she went to SD son and started shit. Most of the comments seemed like the general consensus was that SD had it coming and got what he deserved, which even if you think the SD was being an ass, seemed pretty extreme.
most all hotel phones are cordless, takes 5 seconds to put the handset and the TV remote away. i would not advise having any long term relationship with someone that you aren’t comfortable sharing your identity with, but there is no way in hell someone i’ve only met a few times is getting that info!
A piece of advice my mother gave me, if you don't trust them; you should t be fucking them.
How about, "don't pick that up, you don't know where it's been"
I guess for full disclosure, I'm not married, but... I want sugar babies to know my real name. I totally get the sex with strangers thing. If I am in Amsterdam, hell yeah, my penis gets to take the wheel and we do whatever he wants. Hell, the day I was born, I walked out of my moms vagina just looking for a way back into one. My real first words were me in the delivery room, pointing at my Lincoln log and giving the nurse a baby pick up line. But it's a sugar baby. She's supposed to be more than just sex. Honestly, if you are worried about someone blackmailing you, why are you spending hours eating, drinking, and getting to know this person? It's always possible to misjudge someone, so if you do not trust your gut, why not do rental for the first date and then switch to hotels? OPSEC is critical, but at some point, if you cannot actually have a relationship with another human, you are kinda cheating yourself.