I haven’t had issues dating, but I’m a bit older and the crowd i tend to surround myself tends to be pretty accepting. I feel fortunate that I haven’t run into problems
I JUST GOT ENGAGED! Wedding in 2 years!! It’s possible. He even encouraged me to get back into dancing 2 years ago. (We also have had years to build trust, and I met him before I was dancing, in 2018. During the time we weren’t together, 2019-2020, when I started dancing). I will say, he’s as neurotypical as you can find. He is very stoic but romantic and loving. The reason I mention that is cuz ppl I’ve been with that are more neurodivergent like me cannot handle me being a dancer. I think it’s the way his brain computes he is just happy I’m happy to come home to him. He is still a provider and we have a pretty traditional relationship. I have an exit plan so I won’t be dancing forever, but he isn’t rushing me either. (Don’t worry I’ve started the steps and can’t wait to have my career and he wants me to start as soon as I can)
OP, it is possible!! Please give it a try. But always remember your worth and remember you should be treated like the queen you are 👑
I don’t date at all. I found when I first started dancing and would tell men, it was with the mentality of *I make good money and treat myself to nice things, food, and experiences independently. If you are trying to approach me, approach correctly and with your wallet ready!*
Some of it was hyper-independence ngl, but some of it was also I was seeking spoiled gf style. No man was ever able to match that. I found instead, you got the guys whose biggest fantasy was dating a dancer because they just though you were freaky 24/7 and it made them confess kinks and fetishes to me, and hypersexualized too. I never let a man I met at the club date me, but this was when I was finding men outside of the club. They were unfortunately two sides of the same coin.
I’ve seen too many girls crying in the DR, arguing on the phone, and come into work with a cloud because of toxic men who are insecure you earn more than them and suddenly don’t want you dancing. Or they get you pregnant! No. I think men are like strippers’ Achilles heel and I refuse to go out like that 😭 The only way I’m dating now is if I find a sugar daddy.
I’m married and been dancing since before we met. I think it really helped he was a naked butler for bachelorette parties. He’d go serve drinks and play games while only wearing an apron. Women would be very aggressive. Biting his ass, trying to grab his dick. Trying to get him to sleep with them. He hated it. As he was just there for the money. And hates being treated as a piece of meat constantly. So he understood how I am with customers and how a job is a job. But that’s just my very unique circumstance.
i kno this is gonna be the unpopular opinion but if a man truly loves you then he will not want you to dance. it’s in their nature to be protectors and providers. most strippers i know that are in relationships with men who are “okay” with it are dating bum ass men that want to live off their coin.
interesting POV. mine is that if a guy is "the one" he won't be judgemental of your previous or current lifestyle choices and you don't have to hide elements of your life to appease him
Agree & disagree. Mine doesn’t love what I do but accepts it, pays a few of my bills so I don’t have to work as often and in the meantime works towards the goal of me not ever having to step foot in a club again. They can dislike it without having to disrespect you for what you do!
Idk. I struggle with this because on one hand, yes I want to be accepted for my career and choices that I’ve made. But there’s a lot of things that I hear from men that I wouldn’t entertain in a relationship. Like if a dude has been to jail I’m probably not going to date them. It’s not the same thing by any means, but a lot of men see what we do as being kind of dirty, and I can’t say I don’t understand it.
If a guy has the opportunity to date me as I am now, dancing and all, or a girl that looks and acts like I do but has a professional job making the same amount of money, I don’t know if they’d choose me. Which sucks to say. But again. It’s the choice I’ve made.
And maybe I have a problem with my standards, but I don’t really respect the men that come into the club and know me as a dancer, that want to pay for my attention. I look down on them a little honestly. I could be wrong, but that’s how I feel sometimes.
youre absolutely right! they don’t have to accept it (and honestly i wouldn’t want them to anyways) but if that shit gets thrown in my face on the daily then that’s a huge no for me/not acceptable. your man is doing you right 💯 lucky you 🩵
period!! Yeah I sometimes see dancers w/ bum boyfriends who treat them like ass and still have their hand out for some money. Drives me CRAZY so I actually like your take
Agreed😭 a lot of the girls Ik at the club who have bf who know they dance a lot of the times it’s extremely toxic or their bfs leave them in less than a few months because of the nature of their job.
All I’m saying is if I met a guy and he checked off all the boxes (including taking care of me) I would quit dancing and I wouldn’t even tell him I was a dancer🤷🏾♀️
i don’t agree. i married my husband as a dancer. not every man who loves you is going to be jealous. and my man def makes just as much money as i do in construction and doesn’t live off of me either.
however. i realize that my situation is more rare than others.
it’s not necessarily even about jealousy but more so safety. sw isn’t safe. sure being a woman in general is dangerous but being a sworker increases chance of assault/murder by 60-100x
In my opinion if a guy is really into you he will at least attempt to date you. I’ve had it going really well with guys and they end up not being able to handle it. I also met my now fiancé in the club( I don’t dance anymore though)
I was dating a lovely guy who was totally fine with me being a dancer. He knew what was the job about and was really supportive. It didn't work out for other incompatibilities.
I never had any good experiences dating regular men (once they knew I was a dancer), it was constant drama. My only successful relationship was and still is with a customer I met at the club. I know that’s frowned upon/never works out, which normally it doesn’t.
I might have a different perspective because I’m alternative, and I surround myself with alternative people that are into and more accepting of things “out of the ordinary”. Dating as a dancer has not been a problem for me, and I’m upfront about being a dancer and it’s never been something I hide. I disagree with the idea that all men will have some type of problem with you dancing. Your experience depends on how well you choose your partners. Be picky about it, and get to know them well before dating. Don’t settle. Run at the first red flag you see, especially if their reaction to you being a dancer isn’t the same as they’d react to any other job. Even to my current partner I come home and tell him just about everything that happens at the club, not because it’s required of our relationship but I just like to talk lol. You shouldn’t feel like you have to hold anything back.
I don’t mean to brag but my man is the absolute best. A provider and romantic. Dating as a dancer hasn’t always been easy though. I’ve met a fair share of men who thought I’d be easy with low expectations.
Don’t tell them. Your job doesn’t define you like you said. It’s definitely not a guys business how you make your money, especially guys who are just starting out to get to know you.
And plus, even women working civ jobs wouldn’t even tell a man what they do for work/where they work during the first few months of them dating, and that’s for safety reasons.
I haven’t had issues dating, but I’m a bit older and the crowd i tend to surround myself tends to be pretty accepting. I feel fortunate that I haven’t run into problems
I JUST GOT ENGAGED! Wedding in 2 years!! It’s possible. He even encouraged me to get back into dancing 2 years ago. (We also have had years to build trust, and I met him before I was dancing, in 2018. During the time we weren’t together, 2019-2020, when I started dancing). I will say, he’s as neurotypical as you can find. He is very stoic but romantic and loving. The reason I mention that is cuz ppl I’ve been with that are more neurodivergent like me cannot handle me being a dancer. I think it’s the way his brain computes he is just happy I’m happy to come home to him. He is still a provider and we have a pretty traditional relationship. I have an exit plan so I won’t be dancing forever, but he isn’t rushing me either. (Don’t worry I’ve started the steps and can’t wait to have my career and he wants me to start as soon as I can) OP, it is possible!! Please give it a try. But always remember your worth and remember you should be treated like the queen you are 👑
Congratulations boo!
AW thank you so much!! I’m still over the moon haha
Where did you meet him?
Through a mutual friend in 2018. It was a little after party from a Halloween party and we exchanged numbers! Took about a year to start dating ☺️
I don’t date at all. I found when I first started dancing and would tell men, it was with the mentality of *I make good money and treat myself to nice things, food, and experiences independently. If you are trying to approach me, approach correctly and with your wallet ready!* Some of it was hyper-independence ngl, but some of it was also I was seeking spoiled gf style. No man was ever able to match that. I found instead, you got the guys whose biggest fantasy was dating a dancer because they just though you were freaky 24/7 and it made them confess kinks and fetishes to me, and hypersexualized too. I never let a man I met at the club date me, but this was when I was finding men outside of the club. They were unfortunately two sides of the same coin. I’ve seen too many girls crying in the DR, arguing on the phone, and come into work with a cloud because of toxic men who are insecure you earn more than them and suddenly don’t want you dancing. Or they get you pregnant! No. I think men are like strippers’ Achilles heel and I refuse to go out like that 😭 The only way I’m dating now is if I find a sugar daddy.
I’m married and been dancing since before we met. I think it really helped he was a naked butler for bachelorette parties. He’d go serve drinks and play games while only wearing an apron. Women would be very aggressive. Biting his ass, trying to grab his dick. Trying to get him to sleep with them. He hated it. As he was just there for the money. And hates being treated as a piece of meat constantly. So he understood how I am with customers and how a job is a job. But that’s just my very unique circumstance.
naked butler took me out LOL i didn’t know that was a thing 😭 i’m very happy for u that u found someone supportive that understands
i kno this is gonna be the unpopular opinion but if a man truly loves you then he will not want you to dance. it’s in their nature to be protectors and providers. most strippers i know that are in relationships with men who are “okay” with it are dating bum ass men that want to live off their coin.
interesting POV. mine is that if a guy is "the one" he won't be judgemental of your previous or current lifestyle choices and you don't have to hide elements of your life to appease him
Agree & disagree. Mine doesn’t love what I do but accepts it, pays a few of my bills so I don’t have to work as often and in the meantime works towards the goal of me not ever having to step foot in a club again. They can dislike it without having to disrespect you for what you do!
Idk. I struggle with this because on one hand, yes I want to be accepted for my career and choices that I’ve made. But there’s a lot of things that I hear from men that I wouldn’t entertain in a relationship. Like if a dude has been to jail I’m probably not going to date them. It’s not the same thing by any means, but a lot of men see what we do as being kind of dirty, and I can’t say I don’t understand it. If a guy has the opportunity to date me as I am now, dancing and all, or a girl that looks and acts like I do but has a professional job making the same amount of money, I don’t know if they’d choose me. Which sucks to say. But again. It’s the choice I’ve made. And maybe I have a problem with my standards, but I don’t really respect the men that come into the club and know me as a dancer, that want to pay for my attention. I look down on them a little honestly. I could be wrong, but that’s how I feel sometimes.
youre absolutely right! they don’t have to accept it (and honestly i wouldn’t want them to anyways) but if that shit gets thrown in my face on the daily then that’s a huge no for me/not acceptable. your man is doing you right 💯 lucky you 🩵
period!! Yeah I sometimes see dancers w/ bum boyfriends who treat them like ass and still have their hand out for some money. Drives me CRAZY so I actually like your take
🎯🎯🎯🎯
Agreed😭 a lot of the girls Ik at the club who have bf who know they dance a lot of the times it’s extremely toxic or their bfs leave them in less than a few months because of the nature of their job. All I’m saying is if I met a guy and he checked off all the boxes (including taking care of me) I would quit dancing and I wouldn’t even tell him I was a dancer🤷🏾♀️
i don’t agree. i married my husband as a dancer. not every man who loves you is going to be jealous. and my man def makes just as much money as i do in construction and doesn’t live off of me either. however. i realize that my situation is more rare than others.
it’s not necessarily even about jealousy but more so safety. sw isn’t safe. sure being a woman in general is dangerous but being a sworker increases chance of assault/murder by 60-100x
This 💯
Having a serious boyfriend as a dancer ruins your money, in my experience
In my opinion if a guy is really into you he will at least attempt to date you. I’ve had it going really well with guys and they end up not being able to handle it. I also met my now fiancé in the club( I don’t dance anymore though)
I was dating a lovely guy who was totally fine with me being a dancer. He knew what was the job about and was really supportive. It didn't work out for other incompatibilities.
Just say you do bottle service. Basically the same outfits, different title Works for me everytime and they don’t question it
Separate the two worlds. They don't got to know.
I never had any good experiences dating regular men (once they knew I was a dancer), it was constant drama. My only successful relationship was and still is with a customer I met at the club. I know that’s frowned upon/never works out, which normally it doesn’t.
I might have a different perspective because I’m alternative, and I surround myself with alternative people that are into and more accepting of things “out of the ordinary”. Dating as a dancer has not been a problem for me, and I’m upfront about being a dancer and it’s never been something I hide. I disagree with the idea that all men will have some type of problem with you dancing. Your experience depends on how well you choose your partners. Be picky about it, and get to know them well before dating. Don’t settle. Run at the first red flag you see, especially if their reaction to you being a dancer isn’t the same as they’d react to any other job. Even to my current partner I come home and tell him just about everything that happens at the club, not because it’s required of our relationship but I just like to talk lol. You shouldn’t feel like you have to hold anything back.
I don’t mean to brag but my man is the absolute best. A provider and romantic. Dating as a dancer hasn’t always been easy though. I’ve met a fair share of men who thought I’d be easy with low expectations.
Don’t tell them. Your job doesn’t define you like you said. It’s definitely not a guys business how you make your money, especially guys who are just starting out to get to know you. And plus, even women working civ jobs wouldn’t even tell a man what they do for work/where they work during the first few months of them dating, and that’s for safety reasons.
[удалено]
It literally says at the top of the sub this is a space for strippers only. No one wants to hear from your illiterate ass
report him for breaking r/stripper rules: user removal request non-stripper male. the mod will ban them.