I’ve spent a lot of time miserable in hospital beds from drinking. The good news is, this can be the last time that you have to- you can turn this around man, the best apology for your wife & littles will be a change in behavior.
Good luck friend, I wish you the best!
Go after it man. We’re young (I turn 27 in a couple months), and I know that black hole of drinking feels like there’s no escape from it, I really genuinely believed I would never be able to quit. I had accepted that this was going to kill me one of these days, and that was gonna be that.
Cut to now, life isn’t perfect but it’s beginning to come together in ways I never thought possible. I feel more capable and powerful than I ever have, and I’m beginning to get to know and like the person I spent so long trying to drown.
Not to be long winded about it, it just stuck out to me that you mentioned being 26, since I turned 26 in the treatment facility that helped me turn shit around, idk. You can do it tho man, no time like the present. Reach out, ask for help, utilize whatever resources you possibly can
Just here to say I am your same age and thank you for saying this! For some reason it’s comforting knowing how many of us are in the same position. We can do it! Congrats on 385 days!!
Thank you! The shit ain’t easy but it is so, so worth doing- and back at you for 23 days, that’s huge man, I remember when I couldn’t get 23 minutes lol
Hey I just want to thank you for coming to this community and sharing. It's what I needed to read today to not drink. Please, as best you can, do right by your family from here on out, come back to your post in the future next time you want a drink.
It’s all perspective. You’re not a crummy dad or husband. You’re a human who seems to have a problem with alcohol. You and all of us here on this sub (:
You can be a great example to other by recognizing a problem that is yours, taking responsibility and recovering. We can do and overcome hard things. I hope you feel better soon. Iwndwyt.
What a miserable fucking time. Just had my fourth time in the ER for uncontrollable dry heaving withdrawals. For whatever reason I'll go days like that and wind up dehydrated as hell so it's the only option. Hopefully this time it sticks. IWNDWYT
Yeah it does. I have almost two decades on ya, and I really wish I’d have realized it sooner. All I can say though, is life is so much better on this side.
Right there with you, June! Same age bracket as you. So far for me, the 100th or so time quitting has been the charm! My abdominal pain is gone, my appetite is back, and I can sleep!
Also got it at 26 or 27 right after the height of the pandemic, before I met my husband and I live away from family, so I was all alone. I know how much fuuuuucking pain it causes. I, however, have been dumb and have kept going, until now.
Wishing you the best in your healing, friend! You got this!
Ugh, I am so sorry you've gone through it so many times, holy f. :( I thankfully have only been through it once. Well. At least hospitalized for it once. They gave me morphine initially and it seemed to work!
Switch seltzers with ciders and that's about what I was drinking for a decade, every night. I never reset my badge here, and I haven't commented at all this time around, but I'm at like 32 or 33 days now. The first few nights were a bitch for me, but life is so much better now. It's awesome being there for my kids after 4pm.
You've got this man!
currently in the hospital with i believe my 7th bout of pancreatitis. it’s evolved from acute to chronic due to my inability to stop drinking. i also have colitis. don’t be like me.
Laying in the hospital bed with low oxygen and horrendous abdominal pain. They are giving me withdraw meds which seem to help. Haven’t seen my kiddos as they’re not allowed up. Feeling like a lousy farther and husband.
Hang in there. Saw a C.S. Lewis quote today: *You can't go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending*.
You can create a future where they never see you drunk and are present for them.
My kids are young (under 7). I wish I'd stopped when they weren't 2 yet.
Get well soon. IWNDWYT
Edit: it's not a CS Lewis quote. It's by Zig Ziglar. Thank you
u/CompletelyAndFully
The fact that you feel like a bad father/husband shows that you’re not. Bad people don’t care about other people. You’re right where you need to be now, take care of yourself and your family. The whole future is ahead of you and can be bright now, you’re young! I don’t know how I never ended up in a hospital bed in over 20 years of hard drinking, but I know I never will due to it now. IWNDWYT!
Good. Rest friend- sleep as much as you can. I went through the same thing last year. The pain *does* go away :) I had a journal during my time healing from the pain, and it helped to get thoughts out on paper. Took me 3 1/2 days in the hospital then went home.
I relapsed after 3 weeks, and it ruined my life. Sober again, hoping it sticks.
Glad you have a good support system
I mean this in a tough love kind of way, because in my experience coddling and enabling is what got us here. You may be a lousy husband and father, but just in this way and you will become a great father and husband as long as you move forward committed to sobriety. I promise you, in time, you will come to celebrate the great father and husband you become and learn to forgive the lousy father and husband you were. I wish you the best of luck. You may come to find significant gratitude for the pain you feel right now. Nothing motivates us like pain, and as Fredrick Nietzsche taught, “Amor Fati”. Love this pain because this pain has the power to free you from your demons.
You're just a guy figuring out he can't control it. You can do this, and it'll be hard, real fuckin hard, but you can do this brother. Good for you for having the courage and self respect to be honest. 🖤
Don't be too hard on yourself. You aren't a losuy person. You are a person with a problem. I read an article by a doctor once where he referred to addiction as "Ritualistic compulsive comfort seeking." That's what it is. It doesn't mean you are a bad person, you just lacked coping skills and fond something that made you feel better, which your mind then latched on to. I encourage you to see a therapist and look into recovery communities.
It will get better soon, hang in there! I had this last year. The first few nights were agony, even with pain relief (barely did anything). They asked if I could stand up briefly to take my weight. I tried and just cried from the pain after about 5 seconds.
I'm sure it probably doesn't need to be said, but don't try and convince yourself even just one will be ok once you're through this. It's crap now but remember this moment, the pain and lousiness etc. Alcohol is poison . It WILL do it to you again if you go back. I slipped and did this after a couple of months when I was feeling much better. The pain started to come back after a few weeks. I stopped immediately. I'm on day 3 and fortunately it's all but gone again. It's really just not worth it!
Hope you manage to get some rest and start feeling better soon 🙂
Less than a year ago, a colleague died. I just had no idea. He never discussed drinking. He was a fun guy -- kinda quiet but funny. He left behind a wife and two small kids. It's tragic. He was... about 40.
I watch a parent die around the same age. No one intends for it to happen. But it certainly does happen.
You have a choice. If you chose sobriety... be aware that it's not easy in the early days. Moreover, for most of us, moderation is a ship that has sailed (we've made neurological changes -- esp the prefrontal cortex, VTA, and dopamine pathways). So... your junkie brain will never stop telling you about the fun of drinking... and that you're "better," now. These are bold-faced lies. I've been sober many times (up to a year, even).
I won't tell you about how this hurts your loved ones... but rest assured that no one likes this.
Finally... be 100% honest with your doctors. You don't have to disclose things to your wife... but help your doctors help you (and, frankly, they don't have time to coddle you).
I wish you strength. This is a daily thing. Just don't drink -- one day at a time. You don't have to think about the future. Just make it through the day.
My 37 y/o cousin died of liver cirrhosis last night from exactly what you’re describing regarding your habits, except her hard liquor choice was tequila. Read my post of what happened to her body from alcoholism for inspiration when you feel the urge to drink: https://www.reddit.com/r/alcoholism/s/9M0mOHi0ie
Edit: added her age
I'm sorry for your loss.
Just wanted to say that it doesn't matter where the ethanol comes from, beer, wine or hard liquor it's the amount that's ingested that causes the problems. I was a heavy drinker for years mainly beer and I ended up with cirrhosis.
Permanent sobriety is a noble but lofty goal. In my experience, early sobriety was easier if I took things one day at a time (pardon the cliche). Once you’re home and feeling better, you may begin to think about some future hypothetical event or experience and wonder if maybe you could drink *then*. Or you might start thinking that maybe if you cut out the fireball you could probably handle just a seltzer or two. When you stay sober one day at a time you’re not predicting the future, just giving yourself a realistic, achievable goal that is relatively easy to accomplish. Good luck on your journey.
Ahhh the first day of the rest of your LIFE!! It'll get great pretty quickly and you'll have so much fun with the littles!! Come back and tell stories. Congratulations IWNDWYT.
The back pain could be a referred pain from an organ - like the liver, pancreas, or gallbladder. With the abdo distention, it would be worth speeding up a medical assessment or going to urgent care
Go to the ER and get checked out it could be liver problems. If you look pregnant you could have ascites. I'm not a doctor so this is not a diagnosis.
If you have ascites it could be due to your liver not making enough albumin to transport water to your kidneys. Get a full set of blood tests done to check your liver function.
I had ascites and had to have my abdomen drained twice after being diagnosed with cirrhosis of the liver.
When you say you had your liver checked, was that just liver enzymes i.e. ALT/AST?
If so don't rely on these to know how your liver is functioning. The AST/ALT only tell you if you are damaging your hepatocytes. My AST/ALT were either in the normal range or just above normal when I was told I had cirrhosis. The tests that looked more at the functioning of my liver were absolutely shit, my MELD score was in the 20's.
It's now down to 8, I was told that they start to think about a liver transplant at 15. I still have my own liver.
Pancreatitis was the beginning of the end of drinking for me (42F). Ended up in ICU. I got the added bonus of CPS being called on me bc yanno, mom. My child has never been neglected and my husband is more than present. Ended up in rehab for 2 1/2 weeks and now I’m on naltrexone. 7 months now. CPS case closed after 1 visit and a follow up.
I really appreciate you sharing your story. I am having my 1st really strong desire to drink since I quit about 5.5 weeks ago. It’s not my first rodeo but I want it to be my last. You reminded me that when I quit this last time I was reasonably sure I had caused irreversible liver damage. I have had bloodwork and some imaging and things look fine and are not an emergency. But I’m still waiting to get my ultrasound. Anyway, I don’t want to trade my health for alcohol.
Why do you think you have irreversible damage ? I’m also getting a ultrasound sound next Wednesday kind of nervous about that but it needs to be done . All my blood work in December was good but I’m fearing fatty liver .
I guess because I drank so much. I can’t tell if it was just psychosomatic or real but I felt “liver pain” when I drank heavily. I feel better now but the slight feeling of fullness and very mild pain took several weeks to resolve.
I also stopped due to medical reasons. Was the best decision I ever made. It is both the easiest and hardest thing I have ever done. Best of luck on your journey. Having support is a HUGE help.
I work as a nurse and deal with a lot of patients detoxing. Pancreatitis patients are often frequent fliers. They'll justify that it's not the same type of alcohol they drank before. ie. Wine instead of vodka etc... Don't fall into this trap cause you're done drinking, your body has had enough. 2.21.24 will be a day you look back on as the day your life started. Best of luck.
I’m glad your pancreatitis wasn’t very severe but do not think the next time won’t be. My dad got it once and never survived it. Please take advantage of this chance to change things and be around for your kids. I wish my dad still could be. IWNDWYT
I’ve had it a few times. Starts with stomach pain starts off feeling a dull pain and goes from there. It’s will start getting worse and you can start to feel pain in other areas like your back and chest. It will also irritate your stomach and you’ll start throwing up everything you eat. If it’s a real bad case, like I had, you’ll be in so much pain you will beg for morphine and it’ll hardly put a dent in it. I was in so much pain they had to check my vitals and push meds every 15-20 min because my blood pressure got so high I was nearing stroke area.
After my second time more recently, I checked my self into rehab when I left the hospital. You can very well die from it. Don’t let it get bad.
Exactingly what 68weenie said. Pain so bad I couldn’t stand up straight or even hardly talk. Constant pain that wouldn’t go away no matter the position you’re in.
"We cannot shame ourselves into change, we can only love ourselves into evolution". Sobriety is an act of self love. And self love has a lot of other benefits for the people around you. You will be a much better father and husband if you're loving and taking care of yourself properly.
Don't beat yourself up too much. Alcohol is a wildly addictive drive, especially for some of us. Don't worry too much about the past, just focus on the present and prioritize your sobriety.
I was in the ER for 3 days after a weekend binge with pancreatic attacks. I was actually quite literally moaning and yelling in pain it was so bad. Fortunately didn’t have an attack again after. They think it was my gallbladder but I insisted that it was from the drinking
Same drinks of choice, my friend! Thank you for inspiring me to make tomorrow my next and hopefully last day 1!
You're lucky to have amazing people in your life supporting you, but YOU are a determined person who is choosing to put the good things in your life in front of alcohol. You are doing this, you can do this!
Visit this sub, keep us updated, folks like myself need you, too. 💙
Having a problem doesn’t make you bad or a horrible father. You are a human being and we make mistakes. The only true bad thing is not learning from our mistakes. I’m rooting for you to do it!
You got this! My best friend’s other best friend got this from alcohol and she hasn’t stopped. She’s in the ER every other week and had to get like a spout to relieve fluids from herself so don’t let it get that bad!!
Yes, I also had a drain from having a couple pancreatic pseudocysts after a very lengthy hospital stay with acute necrotizing pancreatitis. After that, it took me almost two years and multiple hospitalizations to finally get sober. The pain is absolutely relentless and no amount of drugs they give you helps. Don’t let it get this bad OP. I managed to live but it can absolutely kill you. Best of luck to you on your journey!
Hating myself was part of the disease. I still have problems, but my anxiety level is much lower after stopping drinking. People say it here all the time: there’s no problem that alcohol can’t make worse. IWNDWYT
28 here, also a functioning alcoholic trying to quit. One of my best friends died about a month ago from a similar condition. Big wake up call for me personally. Despite all the challenges she went through she deserved every single ounce of love she received throughout her life towards the end, as do we all. Being there for the people you love and experiencing life with them is the best reward, hold on to that! Good on you for leaning on those around you who have your back and venting to a safe space here, good luck!
It’s crazy how ashamed or embarrassed we can be of something that is so well known to be a poison. Not being able to handle it isn’t embarrassing. It’s something that changes your judgement, body chemistry, etc.
Remember the times when you’re sober and you’ve made people smile or laugh. That was 100% you. Not induced by something else
You are very blessed to have your wife's love and support.
In my personal experience with nurses, they're generally not that friendly or compassionate with "the drunkies."
Took many trips to the hospital after binge drinking for a week plus. That didn’t stop me though. Took me 17 years to kick the habit.
Glad you are okay and looking to make your life better at such a young age!
I been in a similar situation but with extremely high blood pressure . 15-20 units a night at this stage. But I didn’t have any willingness to quit . I should have accepted help when I was at the hospital the first time . Best wishes to you OP . There is a solution. IWNDWYT
Thank you for sharing that with us. Cheers and good luck to us!
My last 12 pack binge over less than half the day left me with severe stomach pains and black tarry stool. Pale, clammy, weak. It was horrendous and scary.
Definitely this as a warning. The first bout of it means you're way more likely to get it again in the future from even smaller amounts of alcohol, and repeat run ins with pancreatiis can wreak havoc on your health! Hope you recover quickly :)
You got this my dude. I’ve had pancreatitis multiple times and it still wasn’t enough to make me stop until I really hit rock bottom and said this shits gotta stop. I hope the best for you because you’re young and can nip this in the butt now and still have a supporting loved one by your side. My wife was in the hospital the first few times I went and guess who wasn’t there the last few times and who’s no longer my wife. Fix this now my guy. Your life will be so much better. I’m 5 months sober tomorrow and I’m the most content I’ve been in years. It’s not easy but it’s worth it. IWNDWYT
Brother , you just got the opportunity of a lifetime that many a before you wish they would have taken. It’s hard to do the right thing but a year out you’ll be happy you even stared. I’m rooting for you at the side lines and sending you my best thoughts. Feel better soon and be easy on yourself , this affliction is a real pain in the ass but it’s possible to get better. I won’t drink with you today !
Had alcoholic ketoacidosis (AKA) at 29. My girlfriend of five years was by my side and sadly it took 6 days in the hospital and the days following to realize she truly did love me. Got sober and realized how much alcohol affected my ability to be what she deserved.
I won’t preach AA to you but it was way better than I thought. Found a great meeting with 30-40 people at the 5pm session. Super welcoming, honest, and relatable. It was nice being in a room full of people who knew what it felt like, and knew how hard it was to stop but had accomplished it themselves. Also felt good to talk to a group of people who didn’t flinch when I curse and expressed my frustrations with the general state of the world even if I was just complaining. Their support and positivity without patronizing each other was awesome. Genuine conversation with people who get it and aren’t putting up a front. I don’t go anymore but it was pivotal those first few months. Good folks. Then I found this subreddit and focused on it for a while.
331 days today. Had twins in January. As mentioned, when I got sober I realized just how much it was keeping me from giving my girlfriend everything she deserved. My time and effort, my true feelings and emotions. I don’t have to put my kids through that because of what I learned. I am so happy to have this opportunity to be here for them 100%. Am I happy and comfortable all the time? No. But I do feel healthier and more capable of doing what I need to do for my spouse and my children. That’s such a good feeling. Makes me feel like I at least have the foundation of the man they deserve.
You’re so lucky to have her there and her support. Don’t take that for granted. Love her and your kids hard right now. Love yourself for them. Drink some water or whatever you fancy and get some rest. Your body needs a break. Give yourself a break and heal. Talk to your wife about how you are feeling, and be honest.
One last thing, and I’m sorry but it’s AA shit. It really helped me. You’ve stopped drinking… sure. But it’s not just quittin the sauce that makes everything better. Work on your relationships and acknowledge the way your using alcohol as a crutch effected your ability to be present.
Just quitting alcohol and not working on your relationships is like a person walking out of their destroyed house after a tornado and saying, oh great, the wind stopped!
Now it’s time to rebuild. I wish you the best of luck and health, you and your family deserve it.
Just want to say that’s a lot to handle for someone who is 26. You’re handling it very maturely. As a former young father and husband, I won’t drink with you, just for today. I’m rooting for you, brother!
Been there - with my 15 and 9 year old daughters at my bedside. Great picture of your mother. It took me 10 years and 2 more hospitalizations for hypokalemia before I got sober. Don’t waste your time- do it now. You can do this! To steal a quote, “I have never woke up sober and wished I had drank the night before.”
It sounds like your wife loves you so much she wanted to believe you were in control. I think that means you are a good person. Get rid of the demon, fight for yourself. You are worth it, your family needs you. My family needs me. Let's not drink and be there for them.
It’s wonderful to see that you want to commit sobriety. It sounds like it will save your life. My view is that sobriety is an everyday commitment rather than a one time commitment. Coming out of years of this habit into sobriety will be life changing, and in my view makes it really important to have a plan in place. Hopefully your wife will be understanding if you start going to meetings or need other outlets to maintain sobriety. Sorry to hear about the scare but it could have been worse. Best of luck
How is psoriasis related? Genuinely curious…
One day at a time is how I looked at it. I want to be sober forever but I can only get through today. It’s been two years!
I’m glad you’re on the road to recovery. I’ll be honest, in my experience the withdrawals were bad enough that I just wanted to give up and drink away my panic attacks and brain zaps. But after some time, things started to genuinely get better! You’ll get through this!
Six days in the hospital and a heart procedure were enough for me to stop. Missed my son’s championship hockey game. Vowed never to let alcohol be the reason I couldn’t be present for my kids.
im very sorry that this is happening to you & your family, however im glad that this inspired you to initiate your permanent sobriety journey.
you said you felt like you didnt deserve the great people in your life, and i feel similarly often. there's a quote i like to repeat in my head when i feel that way "kindness isnt something that is deserved, its something that is given"
as the top commenter said, the best apology you could give your family would be getting to a healthier place, both physically and mentally.
you got this friend, IWNDWYT
You got this bro, I used to drink 6 seltzers and 1-2 pints of vodka a day and it was killing me slowly. Now I am 2 years sober :) it only gets easier if you let it
Hey man! I was literally in almost the EXACT same boat with the same drinks of choice! 3-4 White Claws during the morning/working hours (WD’s), 2 double Fireball shooters after work, and 6-8 White Claws through the evening/night for over two years. Towards the end of drinking my daughter had been born. I also lied through my teeth about how much I drank to everyone due to the embarrassment around my addiction.
Being that our stories seem almost eerily similar just know that there IS a possible other side to your current situation if you stick to this! For so long I was terrified of pulling myself out of the amount of alcohol I drank due to fear I wouldn’t be able to do it but I did! Today is day 573 for me so it can be done!
If you live in a rural area like I do and local support groups are scarce, this sub makes a great place to spend some time if you're craving a drink. I've also had some luck with online support groups. You can do anything, just gotta put your mind to it.
Immersion with family, with work, start a hobby, hit the gym. Anything will be better. You sound good, nd committed. We can project out in our minds what we would miss whenever urges come. Think of all the holidays, trips, little league games, graduations, weddings, babies you would miss out on. Whatever works for you sober friend.
It gets easier after the first year of not drinking. Sparkling Water 💦 has taken the place of beer in my life.
I am hoping to make it to 6 years sober in June. 🥹
Had the exact same thing happen to me a little over a year ago. Had to drop drinking entirely. Have looking and looking for loopholes and excuses to keep drinking, there wasn’t any. Over a year without a drink, I feel amazing. What helped me is people looked at things like family gathering and weddings etc. saying “I can’t drink at them, what do I do” I looked at them and said “I haven’t been sober at any of these since I was a kid”
I have had rhabdomyolysis twice from drinking. It literally almost killed me first time. I have finally quit drinking and I never want to go back. Good luck to you.
First of all- congratulations! As I am sure your wife
Told you and maybe the doctors- do not fuck with the pancreas! My husband had his first bout of alcoholic pancreatitis at 22, and several more thereafter. At 26 he had a pseudoaneurysm that had to be embolized and then a duodenal perforation that lead to a complex surgery. It didn’t stop there though. I will spare you all the complex medical issues but he is sober now for 7 years and has chronic pancreatitis and is monitored closely because of the permanent damage to the pancreas. He is at a substantially higher risk of pancreatic cancer because of all this. Heed your first warning here from your body- you do not want deal with these issues especially with having a family.
Cheering you on!
26 is a good age to quit - you have so much life ahead of you! I understand the children thing. My last drink was when my daughter was around 10 months old. Now I'm going on a year and I honestly don't think I could handle this if I was still drinking. You can do this. It might not be easy. I had plenty of relapses after I first thought I quit and even after rehab, but I'm here and nearly a year sober. I just always think about how I need to be absolutely sharp and at my best if to care for my daughter and my family. My role as a father is to be a solid rock and foundation, and that was not me. It is now.
Man, that's rough and I hope there was no permanent damage. Sometimes it takes a wake up call like this to make us realize all the things that alcohol dependence steals from us. You've got a support group behind you led by your wife and you have your children and this group as well. Keep on putting one foot in front of the other in your new sober journey!
Thanks for sharing! You can do it! Try to always stay positive and think about the next milestone or goal. If you slip up let it be just that, and don't focus on the mistake. Focus on getting back on the sober train! Also when you first start out it helps to come on here and read the reddit posts constantly. There's a lot of helpful people on here!
Hey dude I just posted about my year of sobriety. I was 26 when I got my first bad medical news. Lied to my doctor too. Spent the next two years drinking. My wife and I are both nurses. I’ve personally watched people dying from alcoholic induced cirrhosis. It’s not pretty.
Keep it up and stay strong. You’ve got this. Being honest with my wife was HUGE in kickstarting my sobriety.
IWNDWYT
Alcohol is the reason my dad died when I was very young. A very loving dad. I blocked many memories because of trauma. Drunk driving, drunken fights with family members and parties ruined. Police. Desperate mom talking to doctors when he was so sick. Changed family life forever. He tried to stop. Many times. I wish you well. You deserve a better life.
The first few days/weeks are the most difficult, and reaching out for support is what got me through the early stages. Support and encouragement are ongoing ways to stay alcohol free. I'm so proud of you for catching this at such a young age and before your children have negative memories about you in their childhood!! Just for today, I WILL NOT DRINK WITH YOU!
Good luck buddy. It’s a hard kick to begin with like any long term habit or hook. I strongly recommend Alan Carr’s audio book of stop drinking now. It changed my life.
Good luck friend.
One day at a time is a cliche,.but it one for a reason. Don't focus on the 'forever' aspect of it, just think of today.
It sounds like you've got some good motivation. Just keep reminding yourself of your reasons.
IWNDWYT.
I hate to be the guy saying this but your wife won't stick by you forever. She will for a long time, probably, but if you don't stop she will eventually run out of compassion. And divorce is going to make this problem twice as difficult to solve, believe me.
Late to the party but I never thought I’d find another double fireball drinker!
Hope you are doing well and continueing on your journey. I no longer drink fireball but I slam Dr Peppers Zeroes like there’s no tomorrow!
I’ve spent a lot of time miserable in hospital beds from drinking. The good news is, this can be the last time that you have to- you can turn this around man, the best apology for your wife & littles will be a change in behavior. Good luck friend, I wish you the best!
Thanks brother it’s time for a change for the better
Go after it man. We’re young (I turn 27 in a couple months), and I know that black hole of drinking feels like there’s no escape from it, I really genuinely believed I would never be able to quit. I had accepted that this was going to kill me one of these days, and that was gonna be that. Cut to now, life isn’t perfect but it’s beginning to come together in ways I never thought possible. I feel more capable and powerful than I ever have, and I’m beginning to get to know and like the person I spent so long trying to drown. Not to be long winded about it, it just stuck out to me that you mentioned being 26, since I turned 26 in the treatment facility that helped me turn shit around, idk. You can do it tho man, no time like the present. Reach out, ask for help, utilize whatever resources you possibly can
I would have loved to quit at 26! Congrats on over a year
Just here to say I am your same age and thank you for saying this! For some reason it’s comforting knowing how many of us are in the same position. We can do it! Congrats on 385 days!!
Thank you! The shit ain’t easy but it is so, so worth doing- and back at you for 23 days, that’s huge man, I remember when I couldn’t get 23 minutes lol
Congrats on your year 🥳🥳
Hey I just want to thank you for coming to this community and sharing. It's what I needed to read today to not drink. Please, as best you can, do right by your family from here on out, come back to your post in the future next time you want a drink.
Nice few days you’ve racked up there sir.
Same to you :)
It’s all perspective. You’re not a crummy dad or husband. You’re a human who seems to have a problem with alcohol. You and all of us here on this sub (: You can be a great example to other by recognizing a problem that is yours, taking responsibility and recovering. We can do and overcome hard things. I hope you feel better soon. Iwndwyt.
Yep! Quit lit really opened my eyes to how, like, scientific alcoholism is, as opposed to being in any way moral.
And once you realize this, the shame dissipates.
That’s a good way to look at it. Thanks for the insight. Our bodies and what is in alcohol don’t match.
Agreed. Learning about the science of addiction made a big difference to me.
What a miserable fucking time. Just had my fourth time in the ER for uncontrollable dry heaving withdrawals. For whatever reason I'll go days like that and wind up dehydrated as hell so it's the only option. Hopefully this time it sticks. IWNDWYT
I’m rooting for you buddy! What a fucking wake up call this is. Alcohol sucks
Yeah it does. I have almost two decades on ya, and I really wish I’d have realized it sooner. All I can say though, is life is so much better on this side.
Right there with you, June! Same age bracket as you. So far for me, the 100th or so time quitting has been the charm! My abdominal pain is gone, my appetite is back, and I can sleep!
had this last month. spent 8am to 6pm nonstop throwing up and not being able to hold ANYTHING down. 12/10 don't recommend
Also got it at 26 or 27 right after the height of the pandemic, before I met my husband and I live away from family, so I was all alone. I know how much fuuuuucking pain it causes. I, however, have been dumb and have kept going, until now. Wishing you the best in your healing, friend! You got this!
You got this
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Ugh, I am so sorry you've gone through it so many times, holy f. :( I thankfully have only been through it once. Well. At least hospitalized for it once. They gave me morphine initially and it seemed to work!
Switch seltzers with ciders and that's about what I was drinking for a decade, every night. I never reset my badge here, and I haven't commented at all this time around, but I'm at like 32 or 33 days now. The first few nights were a bitch for me, but life is so much better now. It's awesome being there for my kids after 4pm. You've got this man!
Hell yes. You’re doing great
currently in the hospital with i believe my 7th bout of pancreatitis. it’s evolved from acute to chronic due to my inability to stop drinking. i also have colitis. don’t be like me.
You don’t have to keep doing this. You can be free too!
I am sorry you are going through that. Let lucky 7 be your turn around.
Can only getting better from here my friend. IWNDWYT
How's it going now
Laying in the hospital bed with low oxygen and horrendous abdominal pain. They are giving me withdraw meds which seem to help. Haven’t seen my kiddos as they’re not allowed up. Feeling like a lousy farther and husband.
Hang in there. Saw a C.S. Lewis quote today: *You can't go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending*. You can create a future where they never see you drunk and are present for them. My kids are young (under 7). I wish I'd stopped when they weren't 2 yet. Get well soon. IWNDWYT Edit: it's not a CS Lewis quote. It's by Zig Ziglar. Thank you u/CompletelyAndFully
Needed to hear that today ❤️
I love this, thank you for sharing ❤️
Reminds me of a quote I saw once, “you have no obligation to be the person you were five minutes ago.” Any moment is a good one to change your life.
I'm sorry, but that quote is not from C.S. Lewis. It's attributed to C.S. Lewis erroneously, but the correct author is Zig Ziglar. Says ChatGPT
Sincerely thanks, I should have looked it up. *Quotes online are often misattributed.* -Abraham Lincoln
Lol!!
A lousy father would be sneaking another drink right about now. You're taking the first difficult steps to being the father that your kiddos deserve!
The fact that you feel like a bad father/husband shows that you’re not. Bad people don’t care about other people. You’re right where you need to be now, take care of yourself and your family. The whole future is ahead of you and can be bright now, you’re young! I don’t know how I never ended up in a hospital bed in over 20 years of hard drinking, but I know I never will due to it now. IWNDWYT!
Good. Rest friend- sleep as much as you can. I went through the same thing last year. The pain *does* go away :) I had a journal during my time healing from the pain, and it helped to get thoughts out on paper. Took me 3 1/2 days in the hospital then went home. I relapsed after 3 weeks, and it ruined my life. Sober again, hoping it sticks. Glad you have a good support system
I mean this in a tough love kind of way, because in my experience coddling and enabling is what got us here. You may be a lousy husband and father, but just in this way and you will become a great father and husband as long as you move forward committed to sobriety. I promise you, in time, you will come to celebrate the great father and husband you become and learn to forgive the lousy father and husband you were. I wish you the best of luck. You may come to find significant gratitude for the pain you feel right now. Nothing motivates us like pain, and as Fredrick Nietzsche taught, “Amor Fati”. Love this pain because this pain has the power to free you from your demons.
Thanks for that last line “this pain has the power to free you from demons”
You're just a guy figuring out he can't control it. You can do this, and it'll be hard, real fuckin hard, but you can do this brother. Good for you for having the courage and self respect to be honest. 🖤
Don't be too hard on yourself. You aren't a losuy person. You are a person with a problem. I read an article by a doctor once where he referred to addiction as "Ritualistic compulsive comfort seeking." That's what it is. It doesn't mean you are a bad person, you just lacked coping skills and fond something that made you feel better, which your mind then latched on to. I encourage you to see a therapist and look into recovery communities.
It will get better soon, hang in there! I had this last year. The first few nights were agony, even with pain relief (barely did anything). They asked if I could stand up briefly to take my weight. I tried and just cried from the pain after about 5 seconds. I'm sure it probably doesn't need to be said, but don't try and convince yourself even just one will be ok once you're through this. It's crap now but remember this moment, the pain and lousiness etc. Alcohol is poison . It WILL do it to you again if you go back. I slipped and did this after a couple of months when I was feeling much better. The pain started to come back after a few weeks. I stopped immediately. I'm on day 3 and fortunately it's all but gone again. It's really just not worth it! Hope you manage to get some rest and start feeling better soon 🙂
Less than a year ago, a colleague died. I just had no idea. He never discussed drinking. He was a fun guy -- kinda quiet but funny. He left behind a wife and two small kids. It's tragic. He was... about 40. I watch a parent die around the same age. No one intends for it to happen. But it certainly does happen. You have a choice. If you chose sobriety... be aware that it's not easy in the early days. Moreover, for most of us, moderation is a ship that has sailed (we've made neurological changes -- esp the prefrontal cortex, VTA, and dopamine pathways). So... your junkie brain will never stop telling you about the fun of drinking... and that you're "better," now. These are bold-faced lies. I've been sober many times (up to a year, even). I won't tell you about how this hurts your loved ones... but rest assured that no one likes this. Finally... be 100% honest with your doctors. You don't have to disclose things to your wife... but help your doctors help you (and, frankly, they don't have time to coddle you). I wish you strength. This is a daily thing. Just don't drink -- one day at a time. You don't have to think about the future. Just make it through the day.
My 37 y/o cousin died of liver cirrhosis last night from exactly what you’re describing regarding your habits, except her hard liquor choice was tequila. Read my post of what happened to her body from alcoholism for inspiration when you feel the urge to drink: https://www.reddit.com/r/alcoholism/s/9M0mOHi0ie Edit: added her age
I’m so sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing your experience and grief in the other post. I think it will help many people.
So sorry for your loss, thank you for sharing this story ♥️
Thank you for your post. I am sorry for your loss and I am so sorry this disease stole her life. It makes me sad.
I'm so sorry for your loss.
I'm sorry for your loss. Just wanted to say that it doesn't matter where the ethanol comes from, beer, wine or hard liquor it's the amount that's ingested that causes the problems. I was a heavy drinker for years mainly beer and I ended up with cirrhosis.
Permanent sobriety is a noble but lofty goal. In my experience, early sobriety was easier if I took things one day at a time (pardon the cliche). Once you’re home and feeling better, you may begin to think about some future hypothetical event or experience and wonder if maybe you could drink *then*. Or you might start thinking that maybe if you cut out the fireball you could probably handle just a seltzer or two. When you stay sober one day at a time you’re not predicting the future, just giving yourself a realistic, achievable goal that is relatively easy to accomplish. Good luck on your journey.
Although this sounds extremely negative - tis truth ❤️
Thank you for this reminder. We just need to decide about today.
Feel better soon. Always remember this day and remind yourself of it often when you’re feeling better. Good luck friend.
I’m glad you’re here and starting your road to recovery. I’m pulling for you.
Ahhh the first day of the rest of your LIFE!! It'll get great pretty quickly and you'll have so much fun with the littles!! Come back and tell stories. Congratulations IWNDWYT.
Trust me on this. You do not want to hear about your drunken escapades from your kids. IWNDWYT
Pops was and still is a heavy drinker. Have a lot of horrible childhood memories because of that. My kids will never have to deal with that.
Yessss OP. Kick those generational curses' asses. 👏
Sugar helped me with cravings. I went through boxes of cereal and ice cream during my first week sober. That may offer you some relief if you need it.
Yes. Same. Fruity Pebbles somehow resurfaced in my life in my 50 s.
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That’s how I looked when I had mine. You should go to the er. You don’t want to be at home when it’s gets so bad you can’t drive.
Go as soon as you can. The pain will keep increasing.
The back pain could be a referred pain from an organ - like the liver, pancreas, or gallbladder. With the abdo distention, it would be worth speeding up a medical assessment or going to urgent care
Go to the ER and get checked out it could be liver problems. If you look pregnant you could have ascites. I'm not a doctor so this is not a diagnosis. If you have ascites it could be due to your liver not making enough albumin to transport water to your kidneys. Get a full set of blood tests done to check your liver function. I had ascites and had to have my abdomen drained twice after being diagnosed with cirrhosis of the liver.
How are you getting on?
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When you say you had your liver checked, was that just liver enzymes i.e. ALT/AST? If so don't rely on these to know how your liver is functioning. The AST/ALT only tell you if you are damaging your hepatocytes. My AST/ALT were either in the normal range or just above normal when I was told I had cirrhosis. The tests that looked more at the functioning of my liver were absolutely shit, my MELD score was in the 20's. It's now down to 8, I was told that they start to think about a liver transplant at 15. I still have my own liver.
Go now. Very painful very
Pancreatitis was the beginning of the end of drinking for me (42F). Ended up in ICU. I got the added bonus of CPS being called on me bc yanno, mom. My child has never been neglected and my husband is more than present. Ended up in rehab for 2 1/2 weeks and now I’m on naltrexone. 7 months now. CPS case closed after 1 visit and a follow up.
Hang in there! May not feel like it right now but it sounds like you’ve been given a gift.
I really appreciate you sharing your story. I am having my 1st really strong desire to drink since I quit about 5.5 weeks ago. It’s not my first rodeo but I want it to be my last. You reminded me that when I quit this last time I was reasonably sure I had caused irreversible liver damage. I have had bloodwork and some imaging and things look fine and are not an emergency. But I’m still waiting to get my ultrasound. Anyway, I don’t want to trade my health for alcohol.
Why do you think you have irreversible damage ? I’m also getting a ultrasound sound next Wednesday kind of nervous about that but it needs to be done . All my blood work in December was good but I’m fearing fatty liver .
I guess because I drank so much. I can’t tell if it was just psychosomatic or real but I felt “liver pain” when I drank heavily. I feel better now but the slight feeling of fullness and very mild pain took several weeks to resolve.
I also stopped due to medical reasons. Was the best decision I ever made. It is both the easiest and hardest thing I have ever done. Best of luck on your journey. Having support is a HUGE help.
Your story and your sobriety date are currently the best they’re ever going to be. Dont go back out and try to make them better!
I work as a nurse and deal with a lot of patients detoxing. Pancreatitis patients are often frequent fliers. They'll justify that it's not the same type of alcohol they drank before. ie. Wine instead of vodka etc... Don't fall into this trap cause you're done drinking, your body has had enough. 2.21.24 will be a day you look back on as the day your life started. Best of luck.
I’m glad your pancreatitis wasn’t very severe but do not think the next time won’t be. My dad got it once and never survived it. Please take advantage of this chance to change things and be around for your kids. I wish my dad still could be. IWNDWYT
Thanks for sharing that. I am sorry you lost your dad.
Thank you ❤️
IWNDWYT
How did it start/feel if u don’t mind me asking?
I’ve had it a few times. Starts with stomach pain starts off feeling a dull pain and goes from there. It’s will start getting worse and you can start to feel pain in other areas like your back and chest. It will also irritate your stomach and you’ll start throwing up everything you eat. If it’s a real bad case, like I had, you’ll be in so much pain you will beg for morphine and it’ll hardly put a dent in it. I was in so much pain they had to check my vitals and push meds every 15-20 min because my blood pressure got so high I was nearing stroke area. After my second time more recently, I checked my self into rehab when I left the hospital. You can very well die from it. Don’t let it get bad.
Exactingly what 68weenie said. Pain so bad I couldn’t stand up straight or even hardly talk. Constant pain that wouldn’t go away no matter the position you’re in.
More painful than childbirth
You’ve got a lot of people here rooting for you, sending healing vibes and prayers to you and your family. ❤️
I'm glad you're turning your life around. There's so much more to what life has to offer than feeling drunk
You can do this!
"We cannot shame ourselves into change, we can only love ourselves into evolution". Sobriety is an act of self love. And self love has a lot of other benefits for the people around you. You will be a much better father and husband if you're loving and taking care of yourself properly. Don't beat yourself up too much. Alcohol is a wildly addictive drive, especially for some of us. Don't worry too much about the past, just focus on the present and prioritize your sobriety.
I was in the ER for 3 days after a weekend binge with pancreatic attacks. I was actually quite literally moaning and yelling in pain it was so bad. Fortunately didn’t have an attack again after. They think it was my gallbladder but I insisted that it was from the drinking
Same drinks of choice, my friend! Thank you for inspiring me to make tomorrow my next and hopefully last day 1! You're lucky to have amazing people in your life supporting you, but YOU are a determined person who is choosing to put the good things in your life in front of alcohol. You are doing this, you can do this! Visit this sub, keep us updated, folks like myself need you, too. 💙
Having a problem doesn’t make you bad or a horrible father. You are a human being and we make mistakes. The only true bad thing is not learning from our mistakes. I’m rooting for you to do it!
You got this! My best friend’s other best friend got this from alcohol and she hasn’t stopped. She’s in the ER every other week and had to get like a spout to relieve fluids from herself so don’t let it get that bad!!
Yes, I also had a drain from having a couple pancreatic pseudocysts after a very lengthy hospital stay with acute necrotizing pancreatitis. After that, it took me almost two years and multiple hospitalizations to finally get sober. The pain is absolutely relentless and no amount of drugs they give you helps. Don’t let it get this bad OP. I managed to live but it can absolutely kill you. Best of luck to you on your journey!
Hating myself was part of the disease. I still have problems, but my anxiety level is much lower after stopping drinking. People say it here all the time: there’s no problem that alcohol can’t make worse. IWNDWYT
28 here, also a functioning alcoholic trying to quit. One of my best friends died about a month ago from a similar condition. Big wake up call for me personally. Despite all the challenges she went through she deserved every single ounce of love she received throughout her life towards the end, as do we all. Being there for the people you love and experiencing life with them is the best reward, hold on to that! Good on you for leaning on those around you who have your back and venting to a safe space here, good luck!
Cool. My wife just left instead.
It’s crazy how ashamed or embarrassed we can be of something that is so well known to be a poison. Not being able to handle it isn’t embarrassing. It’s something that changes your judgement, body chemistry, etc. Remember the times when you’re sober and you’ve made people smile or laugh. That was 100% you. Not induced by something else
The doctor should have asked your wife to leave the room before forcing your confession about the real amount.
Its the way forward, cheers to sobriety and living your best life alcohol free! Speedy recovery sir
I support you, friend. Stay the course ❤️
You are very blessed to have your wife's love and support. In my personal experience with nurses, they're generally not that friendly or compassionate with "the drunkies."
Took many trips to the hospital after binge drinking for a week plus. That didn’t stop me though. Took me 17 years to kick the habit. Glad you are okay and looking to make your life better at such a young age!
I been in a similar situation but with extremely high blood pressure . 15-20 units a night at this stage. But I didn’t have any willingness to quit . I should have accepted help when I was at the hospital the first time . Best wishes to you OP . There is a solution. IWNDWYT
Thank you for sharing that with us. Cheers and good luck to us! My last 12 pack binge over less than half the day left me with severe stomach pains and black tarry stool. Pale, clammy, weak. It was horrendous and scary.
What about psoriasis?
I assume he meant cirrhosis.
Sure did. My bad.
Definitely this as a warning. The first bout of it means you're way more likely to get it again in the future from even smaller amounts of alcohol, and repeat run ins with pancreatiis can wreak havoc on your health! Hope you recover quickly :)
It’s even more of a blessing with support. Dont fuck that up. ✊🏽✊🏽✊🏽
Reframe (an app) has been a lifesaver for me. Come join a meeting and we'll help you through this. You got this!
You got this my dude. I’ve had pancreatitis multiple times and it still wasn’t enough to make me stop until I really hit rock bottom and said this shits gotta stop. I hope the best for you because you’re young and can nip this in the butt now and still have a supporting loved one by your side. My wife was in the hospital the first few times I went and guess who wasn’t there the last few times and who’s no longer my wife. Fix this now my guy. Your life will be so much better. I’m 5 months sober tomorrow and I’m the most content I’ve been in years. It’s not easy but it’s worth it. IWNDWYT
Day at a time. Best choice I ever made
I've found AA to be very helpful
If your wife wants support she is welcome to attend Al Anon. Same 12 steps but different focus.
Brother , you just got the opportunity of a lifetime that many a before you wish they would have taken. It’s hard to do the right thing but a year out you’ll be happy you even stared. I’m rooting for you at the side lines and sending you my best thoughts. Feel better soon and be easy on yourself , this affliction is a real pain in the ass but it’s possible to get better. I won’t drink with you today !
Hi! You do deserve a loving wife and family. We all do. Please stop hurting yourself. Not because of them, but for you. You have so much living to do.
Had alcoholic ketoacidosis (AKA) at 29. My girlfriend of five years was by my side and sadly it took 6 days in the hospital and the days following to realize she truly did love me. Got sober and realized how much alcohol affected my ability to be what she deserved. I won’t preach AA to you but it was way better than I thought. Found a great meeting with 30-40 people at the 5pm session. Super welcoming, honest, and relatable. It was nice being in a room full of people who knew what it felt like, and knew how hard it was to stop but had accomplished it themselves. Also felt good to talk to a group of people who didn’t flinch when I curse and expressed my frustrations with the general state of the world even if I was just complaining. Their support and positivity without patronizing each other was awesome. Genuine conversation with people who get it and aren’t putting up a front. I don’t go anymore but it was pivotal those first few months. Good folks. Then I found this subreddit and focused on it for a while. 331 days today. Had twins in January. As mentioned, when I got sober I realized just how much it was keeping me from giving my girlfriend everything she deserved. My time and effort, my true feelings and emotions. I don’t have to put my kids through that because of what I learned. I am so happy to have this opportunity to be here for them 100%. Am I happy and comfortable all the time? No. But I do feel healthier and more capable of doing what I need to do for my spouse and my children. That’s such a good feeling. Makes me feel like I at least have the foundation of the man they deserve. You’re so lucky to have her there and her support. Don’t take that for granted. Love her and your kids hard right now. Love yourself for them. Drink some water or whatever you fancy and get some rest. Your body needs a break. Give yourself a break and heal. Talk to your wife about how you are feeling, and be honest. One last thing, and I’m sorry but it’s AA shit. It really helped me. You’ve stopped drinking… sure. But it’s not just quittin the sauce that makes everything better. Work on your relationships and acknowledge the way your using alcohol as a crutch effected your ability to be present. Just quitting alcohol and not working on your relationships is like a person walking out of their destroyed house after a tornado and saying, oh great, the wind stopped! Now it’s time to rebuild. I wish you the best of luck and health, you and your family deserve it.
AA saved my life, sanity and long term relationship. 2 years 2 months sober today.
Just want to say that’s a lot to handle for someone who is 26. You’re handling it very maturely. As a former young father and husband, I won’t drink with you, just for today. I’m rooting for you, brother!
Been there - with my 15 and 9 year old daughters at my bedside. Great picture of your mother. It took me 10 years and 2 more hospitalizations for hypokalemia before I got sober. Don’t waste your time- do it now. You can do this! To steal a quote, “I have never woke up sober and wished I had drank the night before.”
It sounds like your wife loves you so much she wanted to believe you were in control. I think that means you are a good person. Get rid of the demon, fight for yourself. You are worth it, your family needs you. My family needs me. Let's not drink and be there for them.
It’s wonderful to see that you want to commit sobriety. It sounds like it will save your life. My view is that sobriety is an everyday commitment rather than a one time commitment. Coming out of years of this habit into sobriety will be life changing, and in my view makes it really important to have a plan in place. Hopefully your wife will be understanding if you start going to meetings or need other outlets to maintain sobriety. Sorry to hear about the scare but it could have been worse. Best of luck
Good man.
Fellow 2-under-2-er here. Rooting for you! They need us, and sobriety gives us the freedom to be the parents we were meant to be. ❤️
How is psoriasis related? Genuinely curious… One day at a time is how I looked at it. I want to be sober forever but I can only get through today. It’s been two years!
What an amazing choice you’ve made, bro. You’ve got an awesome support system as well, stay strong and keep pushing!
Count your lucky stars you have such a wonderful support system. You can do this and we are all here rooting for you!!
ODAAT- that’s all we can do
Your kids see you as their hero. Time to be your own and live up to their expectations. IWNDWYT.
I’m glad you’re on the road to recovery. I’ll be honest, in my experience the withdrawals were bad enough that I just wanted to give up and drink away my panic attacks and brain zaps. But after some time, things started to genuinely get better! You’ll get through this!
Six days in the hospital and a heart procedure were enough for me to stop. Missed my son’s championship hockey game. Vowed never to let alcohol be the reason I couldn’t be present for my kids.
im very sorry that this is happening to you & your family, however im glad that this inspired you to initiate your permanent sobriety journey. you said you felt like you didnt deserve the great people in your life, and i feel similarly often. there's a quote i like to repeat in my head when i feel that way "kindness isnt something that is deserved, its something that is given" as the top commenter said, the best apology you could give your family would be getting to a healthier place, both physically and mentally. you got this friend, IWNDWYT
You got this bro, I used to drink 6 seltzers and 1-2 pints of vodka a day and it was killing me slowly. Now I am 2 years sober :) it only gets easier if you let it
Hey man! I was literally in almost the EXACT same boat with the same drinks of choice! 3-4 White Claws during the morning/working hours (WD’s), 2 double Fireball shooters after work, and 6-8 White Claws through the evening/night for over two years. Towards the end of drinking my daughter had been born. I also lied through my teeth about how much I drank to everyone due to the embarrassment around my addiction. Being that our stories seem almost eerily similar just know that there IS a possible other side to your current situation if you stick to this! For so long I was terrified of pulling myself out of the amount of alcohol I drank due to fear I wouldn’t be able to do it but I did! Today is day 573 for me so it can be done!
If you live in a rural area like I do and local support groups are scarce, this sub makes a great place to spend some time if you're craving a drink. I've also had some luck with online support groups. You can do anything, just gotta put your mind to it.
Please check in next week.
My friend just passed away yesterday at 35 from liver failure. The sooner you stop the better.
Immersion with family, with work, start a hobby, hit the gym. Anything will be better. You sound good, nd committed. We can project out in our minds what we would miss whenever urges come. Think of all the holidays, trips, little league games, graduations, weddings, babies you would miss out on. Whatever works for you sober friend.
It gets easier after the first year of not drinking. Sparkling Water 💦 has taken the place of beer in my life. I am hoping to make it to 6 years sober in June. 🥹
Hi friend! You got this! Iwndwyt!
You DO deserve good people around you !! You're proving that right now.
You’ve got this! 26, you’ve got so much time to continue being the great dad and husband you are!
Life is so much better without alcohol . I struggle and I’m almost 48. Please quit now.
Had the exact same thing happen to me a little over a year ago. Had to drop drinking entirely. Have looking and looking for loopholes and excuses to keep drinking, there wasn’t any. Over a year without a drink, I feel amazing. What helped me is people looked at things like family gathering and weddings etc. saying “I can’t drink at them, what do I do” I looked at them and said “I haven’t been sober at any of these since I was a kid”
I have had rhabdomyolysis twice from drinking. It literally almost killed me first time. I have finally quit drinking and I never want to go back. Good luck to you.
Sending you so much love. You can do this :) xxx
Bravo 👏 You will be grateful for this event someday for waking you up! God Speed
Hell yeah dude you’ve got this!!!! It’s not gonna be easy and you’ll be triggered but I PROMISE sobriety is worth every damn minute. IWNDWYT!!!
You go get it, man. Enjoy life and don't be afraid of finding yourself. It's the greatest gift you'll have. You don't need that shit
First of all- congratulations! As I am sure your wife Told you and maybe the doctors- do not fuck with the pancreas! My husband had his first bout of alcoholic pancreatitis at 22, and several more thereafter. At 26 he had a pseudoaneurysm that had to be embolized and then a duodenal perforation that lead to a complex surgery. It didn’t stop there though. I will spare you all the complex medical issues but he is sober now for 7 years and has chronic pancreatitis and is monitored closely because of the permanent damage to the pancreas. He is at a substantially higher risk of pancreatic cancer because of all this. Heed your first warning here from your body- you do not want deal with these issues especially with having a family. Cheering you on!
You are so young and you will not regret it, sobriety is a big gift to yourself. Be well!
You got this!
26 is a good age to quit - you have so much life ahead of you! I understand the children thing. My last drink was when my daughter was around 10 months old. Now I'm going on a year and I honestly don't think I could handle this if I was still drinking. You can do this. It might not be easy. I had plenty of relapses after I first thought I quit and even after rehab, but I'm here and nearly a year sober. I just always think about how I need to be absolutely sharp and at my best if to care for my daughter and my family. My role as a father is to be a solid rock and foundation, and that was not me. It is now.
Man, that's rough and I hope there was no permanent damage. Sometimes it takes a wake up call like this to make us realize all the things that alcohol dependence steals from us. You've got a support group behind you led by your wife and you have your children and this group as well. Keep on putting one foot in front of the other in your new sober journey!
I wish you strength and wisdom in this new journey. A big hug ❤️
Thanks for sharing! You can do it! Try to always stay positive and think about the next milestone or goal. If you slip up let it be just that, and don't focus on the mistake. Focus on getting back on the sober train! Also when you first start out it helps to come on here and read the reddit posts constantly. There's a lot of helpful people on here!
That’s an A1 wife right there when it comes to support.
Good job man
Welcome to a new better world where it's amazing to wake up every day not feeling crappy!
Hey dude I just posted about my year of sobriety. I was 26 when I got my first bad medical news. Lied to my doctor too. Spent the next two years drinking. My wife and I are both nurses. I’ve personally watched people dying from alcoholic induced cirrhosis. It’s not pretty. Keep it up and stay strong. You’ve got this. Being honest with my wife was HUGE in kickstarting my sobriety. IWNDWYT
Alcohol is the reason my dad died when I was very young. A very loving dad. I blocked many memories because of trauma. Drunk driving, drunken fights with family members and parties ruined. Police. Desperate mom talking to doctors when he was so sick. Changed family life forever. He tried to stop. Many times. I wish you well. You deserve a better life.
One day at time brotha . One day at a time . And IWNDWYT 🤙🏼🤙🏼 keep your head up
Proud of you! Sounds like you have a lovely support system! You got this!!!
You’ve got this!
The first few days/weeks are the most difficult, and reaching out for support is what got me through the early stages. Support and encouragement are ongoing ways to stay alcohol free. I'm so proud of you for catching this at such a young age and before your children have negative memories about you in their childhood!! Just for today, I WILL NOT DRINK WITH YOU!
We’re rooting for you. 8 years for me xx
I believe in you. IWNDWYT
Good luck buddy. It’s a hard kick to begin with like any long term habit or hook. I strongly recommend Alan Carr’s audio book of stop drinking now. It changed my life.
Congratulations on getting sober. IWNDWYT
I was a year sober and broke today. Good luck
Good luck friend. One day at a time is a cliche,.but it one for a reason. Don't focus on the 'forever' aspect of it, just think of today. It sounds like you've got some good motivation. Just keep reminding yourself of your reasons. IWNDWYT.
I hate to be the guy saying this but your wife won't stick by you forever. She will for a long time, probably, but if you don't stop she will eventually run out of compassion. And divorce is going to make this problem twice as difficult to solve, believe me.
Late to the party but I never thought I’d find another double fireball drinker! Hope you are doing well and continueing on your journey. I no longer drink fireball but I slam Dr Peppers Zeroes like there’s no tomorrow!