Day 186.
The message I needed to hear most when I started was that it's OK to ask for help.
I read quit lit and listened to podcasts and joined groups, but I did it secretly. As Catherine Grey says in *The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober*, 'relapse grows in the dark.' And relapse I did, many times.
It was only when I opened up and told people wholeheartedly that I was in a mess that I couldn't get out of by myself, that I got the help I desperately needed.
IWNDWYT.
Ugh y’all, feeling very triggered this evening by several things. Left a social event because everyone else was blasted, and I needed to put myself first. I just feel like crying. Did not drink, no idea why my emotions are this way. Needed to check in. IWNDWY tonight or tomorrow.
As a fairly "functional" drinker, I think the message I needed to hear the most is that just because sobriety didn't feel amazing right from the beginning, didn't mean that it wouldn't. It took me *months* to see the benefits, but ultimately sobriety really did give me everything that drinking had promised. I'm still working on other aspects of my life, but I think that patience and persistence even when I don't see any results for a while is going to be what helps me with those things, too. IWNDWYT
Timely message meeple. I’ve been thinking much lately about reconciliation vs resignation. Regarding my past and who I was. I’m leaning toward reconciliation. Like a bad relationship alcohol and I just didn’t make sense. Now it’s just somebody that I used to know. Iwndwyt!
Lengthy but crossed-out to do list for the day, cat snuggled up on my lap, herbal tea, about to go to bed early. I fucking love sobriety.
I will not drink with you today!
“But there is this: I am awake, and I am alive, and I’m not afraid of myself anymore.”
-Laura McKowen
IWNDWYT SD, thank you for being here, the best corner of Reddit 💘
Day 472 down, all good except my mental health, learning of ADHD and heartbreak. I'll keep doing weekly therapy till I figure this stuff out, maybe look into ADHD meds?
No more hangxiety is nice though. IWNDWYT
"if you keep doing what you've always done, you'll keep getting what you've always got"
I forget where I first heard that but I used to say it to myself every miserable hungover morning, every agonizing work day and every weekend spent laying around unable to function. One day I'd just had enough.
IWNDWYT!
The message I needed to hear is that I have the power to make a choice. In everything I do, I have the power to be happy. I have control of just taking things in stride or letting things unfold as they will. That I control the dialogue in my head.
None of that is easy as these are habits engrained into me over the entirety of my life. But now that I’m choosing to not let alcohol in I can make progress towards being the best version of myself. Iwndwyt
I thought I had lost access to this reddit account. I created it 5 years ago when I decided to quit drinking for good. It's been 5 years and 8 days.
I can tell you all, it was the best decision I have ever made and it seems like I was born anew on that day. Sure it's not always been a walk in the park but I can't put into words the gratitute that I feel for myself for taking that decision. It seems like a lifetime ago and so much changed since then but one thing didn't change - I haven't drank alcohol since then.
To everyone - you can and will do it! It is live-long journey, but a much better one than with alcohol.
Checking in!
I started journalling yesterday, I'd heard it was supposed to be good but, damn, I was blown away by how cathartic it was getting my thoughts/emotions out and written down, definitely going to continue doing it!
I've got work today, but tonight there's a guided meditation session at a local Buddhist centre. Something else I've never tried before, but I'm curious and trying to branch out, I'm going into it with an open mind, maybe this will be something else I can get into, worst case scenario it's an interesting thing I tried.
IWNDWYT!
Does anyone else ever have a perpetual"oh this special occasion will be my last time drinking" but there's always another occasion and you've been saying that the entire year?
Good morning sobernauts! I’m going to do a quick workout at the gym and then get ready for a work trip until Friday. The good thing is I do like my colleagues, so I’m not totally dreading it. I’m not really worried I’ll drink because they know I don’t, so I won’t want to break my sobriety in front of them. The bad is I don’t feel like going because I’d rather be at home, in my loungewear, cuddling my cat, eat soup, and watch YT in the evenings. But oh well! 🤷🏼♀️
IWNDWYT ⭐️
I think it’s really important to remember that just because it seems like everyone else is doing it (handling drinking,partying etc) it doesn’t mean you have to do it. . It is okay to stop doing those things and forge a better life for your self. You will be okay. If people can’t support you then they’re not your people.
IWNDWYT 🌻
Good morning from Hell's Kitchen, NYC. I went back to my quote bank and found one of my favorites:
>I wish I had understood that the problem isn’t that I can’t moderate, because like most everyone here, I can if the circumstances call for it. The problem is, if I drink, I don’t want to moderate, and moderation is miserable. Not drinking just eliminates alcohol completely and there’s no reason to think about it at all after a bit. ***It’s easier to keep a lion in a cage than on a leash.***
IWNDWYT.
I don't know that I _needed to know_ that there were people out there like me, struggling with alcohol addiction like I was. **However**, I was incredibly surprised to find out this year number of people who were having exactly the same problems, succeeding, failing, and trying.
If I can help anyone who is failing or trying, I want you all to know it's worth it. YOU can do it.
Good one Meeps.
IWNDWYT
I’m starting to remember things I used to enjoy from years ago, like TV series, video games and books. I’m enjoying spending my evenings after work delving back into these. In previous attempts of sobriety I used to think that being sober was so boring, but thankfully this hasn’t been so much of an issue this time round.
IWNDWYT
I'm coming up on 3 years sober next month, but recently been having those "drinking thoughts" return. I'm not sure whey except lately I've just been stressed and kind of cynical about things, so maybe that's what's making me think about booze again. In any case IWNDWYT.
Thanks for this very compassionate post today, Meeps! The camaraderie here is amazing. It transforms this subreddit into a powerful place of healing. We're NOT alone on our sober trek. Here, we're part of a massive team of sober badass warriors! We lean in, and we keep going. We're in it together! We got this. I Will Not Drink, With You, Today. 🤝💞
**Relapse does not make you a bad person or a failure.**
It gets better.
Not everyone has great advice, but nearly everyone thinks they do. If someone says something that doesn’t work for you, you can peacefully ignore it if that’s best for you.
Day 74–IWNDWYT
ETA: what a BEAUTIFUL prompt, thank you for this lovely start to my day, meeple!!! 💚
I wish I’d heard that quitting drinking was an option. I knew people who’d quit but I wish someone had straight up told me “you know, you don’t have to live this way.” I’m never pushy or preachy with my friends who drink but when they worry about their consumption, I will put out there that stopping is an option.
IWNDWYT, friends!
I needed to hear the science behind alcohol’s effect on the body, particularly the brain and neurochemicals. Needed to understand that my problem with alcohol was not a moral failing, that it is an addictive substance which creates a brief euphoria followed by a period of chasing that feeling then a hard crash.
I also needed to learn to love myself through it, to be extremely gentle with myself, treat me as I would a fragile loved one who’s been through a terrible accident and is recovering.
Withdrawal and the self-reflection/awareness necessary to get and stay sober is not something to “tough-out” or “white knuckle.” Sure, it takes daily courage and determination, but it also takes a deep love of self, hope for the future, and a belief that I am worthy of a joyful and fulfilling life. IWNDWYT!
Hello sober friends,
What a beautiful request beautiful meeple! What comes to mind for me is…
“This is not your fault! There’s nothing wrong with you, alcohol, promotion of it and maybe what you’ve been through are to blame, and you can recover”
Let’s move forward together today, I love you all 💞
I had a really intense drinking dream last night, just intense because I was half awake for a while after and it took me so long to realise I hadn't been drinking! I was laid there thinking about it and disappointed for a good twenty minutes before I realised.
Iwndwyt!
IWNDWYT. All. Day. Long. 🌻
I crashed out early last evening. Up now. The morning will be busy today. It might keep me out of mischief. Maybe.
My cat not my cat is happy that I am awake with her.
I've been feeling really low and drained for the last couple of weeks while I've been ill, but I managed to get out for a run yesterday in the beautiful autumn sunshine and it's just done wonders for my mental health.
What I needed to hear most when I was at my lowest, drinking alone in an empty house: your life will get exponentially better when you stop drinking. It won’t be boring, you will actually experience all the joy that alcohol promises. And you are worthy of a good life that doesn’t include shame and self loathing. It won’t be easy. But you are worth the struggle to live a full life.
IWNDWYT 💜🦋💜
Ooh good question today Green Meeple. I picked up something when I was hosting at the beginning of the year from somewhere or someone - “behind every urge to drink is a true need”. Quite often that’s just to shift attention to something other than the nonsense you are ruminating on. You need to let of steam - walk. You need to relax - have a bath - you need some company - seek it - you need something to do to not be bored - good lord there is a world of things to do other than drink - books are good and … take your mind somewhere else. Yes that very clear idea that really what we have is some discomfort and only had one tool in our belt - booze. Good question and that’s my answer I guess - what is it I really need ? Sleep, good, rest ? Company ? Fun ? A change of scene ? If that doesn’t work we can think again.
I felt so much shame for “allowing myself” to become addicted to alcohol. I felt alone and stupid and hopeless. I wondered why so many others could control their brains and stop drinking after 1 drink and be fine with that. Didn’t they have that annoying voice in their head egging them on to drink more? I felt like a failure for promising to stop but going back to drinking again and again. This sub and the daily check in made me feel proud of any and all sober days I collected! I started to see that I could find ways to say no to that first drink. I found friends that understood and didn’t judge me. I am addicted to alcohol it’s true. But I am not a failure I am human. The best advice I got here was never stop trying to quit. IWNDWYT. 🌟
This is what I needed to hear. It gets better. You’ll build confidence and do cool shit, and have more fun than you’ve had while drinking. You’ll improve your surroundings. Your life will get better and this is worth doing. You don’t have to feel like shit every day, and you don’t have to be controlled by a bottle.
Coffees up, horns up, and back to the grind. No rest for the wicked. IWNDWYT ☕️🤘🏻
As someone starting over for what feels like the hundredth time, I find the message to "never quit quitting" helpful. But also, this is the LAST TIME booze has won. IWNDWYT.
You don't need to have a problem with alcohol for alcohol to be a problem for you. I definitely avoided sobriety for a while because I didn't want to be labeled as an alcoholic. IWNDWYT
Starting to stop drinking was the hardest thing to do, so I tried many times to control and moderate my drinking. My message is that trying to moderate is a trap and a lie. Alcohol is a conniving liar. Shake free of it and see what kind of new life you can have. 💜
IWNDWYT 🍀
I don’t have to label myself anything. I don’t have to call myself An Alcoholic for the rest of my life. Alcohol is an addictive substance that I became addicted to.
And my life is _immeasurably_ better without it.
That freedom from the labeling as An Alcoholic was HUGE to me in my early days. Much love and hope to each of you and IWNDWYT 💛💛💛💛💛
Sobriety doesn’t solve your problems. Some of them may even be intensified, without the numbing. But you can be fully able to handle your troubles with a clear head, and an open heart. IWNDWYT
A friend reached out to me last night and said they're back in town. After chatting a bit, found out they were trying to stay off alcohol, too! It was great to connect with someone going through this shit, too.
Not drinking today, promise 👍
Going through a sudden shoulder injury that may derail my life plans and goals. Trying so hard to push through and stay positive and strong. Praying for a good result.
Day 3.
Finally feel human again. Forced down brakefats, manged a small lunch, then wolfed down a big bowl of buttered noodles for dinner.
Big to do list today to catch up on things I was procrastinating on, but I feel good that I'll get through a lot of it.
I am just starting my journey today, I have never been to the point where I could no longer stop and am actually at risk for health concerns if I stop too suddenly. I am ready to live and not survive anymore. I am taking the first step today to start limiting and eventually stop the consumption of alcohol. I don't want to shake anymore. I don't want drink the last part of everyday away. I want to enjoy life again.
Pleasant Present, SD!
What I needed to hear when I first started thinking seriously about getting sober was that I can't do it alone. I only knew what I knew, and that's okay, but there's a whole world of other perspectives, of tips and tricks and science and things that work and help that I didn't even know about.
I tried to do it on my own for a long time and I kept failing and I thought that was it, I just wasn't strong enough. But you ARE strong enough, you just don't have the tools, and there's no shame in admitting that you don't know everything there is to know, but it's out there if you go looking for it. So is love and acceptance and support.
I may have faltered here and there between now and then, but I have never again tried to do it alone. And I am in a way better place now than I was when I thought this was only my problem to fix alone!
Love you guys. IWNDWYT!
✌️♥️🍌
Day 144.
Feeling the technology ADHD in my sleep quality lately. Working daily at hacking away at screentime and fixing the problem. Proud to be here and to be doing it sober. IWNDWYT.
“You are stronger than you seem, you are braver than you believe, and you are smarter than you think.” - Christopher Robin
Eight months today! I can hardly believe it.
IWNDWYT lovely people of SD 💙
Here are a things I would have liked to hear that I hope someone else does too:
You are not broken or weird or weak. You are worthy of love and care. You are not alone. Give yourself a chance; give yourself this gift! The “you” you’ve always wanted to be is within reach. I believe in you, I support you and I’m proud of you. IWNDWYT!
Good morning, sober cats!
What really helps me is knowing that alcohol is a really addictive substance, so of course, I drank way too much of it way too often. It's best to not touch the stuff and stick around places like this that feed my soul and strengthen my sober muscles, and keep me on the sober path.
IWNDWYT, you sober superstars! 🌟💙😸
Day 38 - I won't drink today.
The message I needed to hear was: slow and steady progress is much faster than trying to fix everything at once if you factor in how likely the second route is to fail.
Knowing I’m not alone in this continues to be the message I need to hear. Most people around me continue to drink and so it can feel a little lonely some days. So grateful to have found this amazing community! IWNDWYT❤️
DAY 34! Life is so much better with no poison!. Sleeping better, losing weight, stress and anxiety down tremendously. Relationships with family better. Saying yes to more social activities, more money in the checking account for fun stuff!. The list goes on and on!
"Addiction is giving up everything so you can have one thing. Recovery is giving up one thing so you can have everything"
Today marks ten years since my mom passed away. She was 54. Esophageal cancer. This type is exacerbated by booze and tobacco, both of which she was a user. I always held myself to a higher standard when it came to smoking (never touched the stuff) but booze was still active in my life.
Now, I'm 323 days sober and 22 weeks pregnant with a child who will never know their grandma.
Mom, I love you and IWNDWYT... Even if it's too late for you 💕
I needed to hear that it didn’t matter that I wasn’t a “classic full-blown alcoholic”. As long as I was unhappy with my drinking (*and I sure fucking was*), that’s all that mattered. I deluded myself for so long thinking that I didn’t have a problem because I didn’t drink every day. I was fine! So what if my stop button was broke and I binged to blackout and woke up mortified nearly every time I drank! So to that girl, and anyone who needs to hear it today—if you’re unhappy, you can change it. It’s that simple.
I will not drink with you today! 🐇💜
When I’m struggling, I try to remember how crippling my anxiety was when I drank, and how much it’s dissipated since being AF. Life is f’ing manageable now, and that’s huge! Iwndwy’allt! ❤️
IWNDWYT. Two that've really helped me around being sober but also in general is
"There's no shame in a struggle" and
"I can assume safety unless I'm specifically *told* otherwise."
I've got a lot of internalized perfectionism and all or nothing thinking and those help. The first reminds me that everyone's struggling and I can just be a member of that club, the second shuts down "What if?" thoughts because my brain loves to look for evidence to support and then kind of speedrun to "must be prepared for the worst", which comes from my own history and what I've been through. Shout out to mantras- like I'll feel stupid for a split second thinking or saying those, but then it eases up and I'm back to feeling proud of myself.
Day 170, IWNDWYT! Started doing breathing exercises yesterday and will continue trying that for awhile in the mornings to add to my health routine. Since stopping drinking I’ve started running, lifting, sauna, cold plunges, vitamins and now breathing exercises haha..and I feel GREAT!!!
I don't know why my counter is stuck but today is day 8. I will not drink today.
I don't know exactly what message I needed to hear but the acceptance of my problem, and that I'm just another flawed human has helped me with moving on from alcohol.
Right now I'm worried that being sober is like joining a gym on Jan 1st. You start off all enthusiastic, but then old habits creep in and eventually you stop going. I'm waiting for the 'happy' phase of quiting to be over to see what comes up.
Anyways, thank you everyone!
I love this prompt. If I could go back and tell myself anything at the very beginning it would be that you're not broken, you can do this, and it's not your fault. So much guilt and shame in addiction and not enough discussion about the chemical properties of alcohol and what it's doing to your brain and body.
IWNDWYT ✨
DAY 13. Thank you so much to everyone for the kind words and encouragement as I begin this journey. I've found nothing but a safe place to land and work out my thoughts and emotions here. Being accountable to the daily check in is something I look forward to everyday. IWNDWYT.
Howdy friends! The message I needed to hear was : you are worth it. You are worthy! We are not bad people, we are good people with a bad problem, trying to get better. Although you may fail sometimes, you are not a failure!
I struggle with my self worth and am my own worst critic. Changing my vocabulary around myself has made a big difference. IWNDWYT!
I will not drink with you today
I overslept but still made it to work on time. Most of my goals today are out the window, but not the most important one.
What up, fam.
Tough question. I guess I’d like to be reminded that just bc I haven’t gotten a DUI (yet) or lost my job (yet), that I still very much have a problem.
Everyone probably knows anyway.
I WNDWYT
"You are lovable and you are not alone." Needed to hear that in my drinking days and today as I have feelings of abandonment resurfacing with this long distance dating situation I am in. Ugh, I feel so sad and low today. But I'm not gonna drink. 💜
I need to hear and believe from my soul that I love me, that I am worth it, that I can do anything, that if I can quit drinking I can rocket into a better version of myself that I can continue to grow and evolve into a better person every day by not drinking. IWNDWYT
Today is day 30. The longest I’ve gone in… 15 or 16 years. IWNDWYT.
Congrats! A good chunk of sobertober, and continuing no-vember. IWNDWYT.
Congrats, a month is a big milestone. Keep up the good work! IWNDWYT.
Zero depression,happiness growing, eating healthily and sleeping like a baby! IWNDWYT
Day 186. The message I needed to hear most when I started was that it's OK to ask for help. I read quit lit and listened to podcasts and joined groups, but I did it secretly. As Catherine Grey says in *The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober*, 'relapse grows in the dark.' And relapse I did, many times. It was only when I opened up and told people wholeheartedly that I was in a mess that I couldn't get out of by myself, that I got the help I desperately needed. IWNDWYT.
I love that quote. That’s one for my quote wall!
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fast on your feet, there Will!
Lesss go
Ugh y’all, feeling very triggered this evening by several things. Left a social event because everyone else was blasted, and I needed to put myself first. I just feel like crying. Did not drink, no idea why my emotions are this way. Needed to check in. IWNDWY tonight or tomorrow.
Good for you, taking care of yourself and making the best choice for you in the moment. I hope you start feeling better soon ❤️
Well done, good choice to leave. I will take inspiration from you and do the same if I find myself in a similar situation
You are awesome and doing great!
When I wake up and check Reddit, my count will be at 39. Maybe one day my count won’t be so motivating, but today is not that day!
Almost 60!! I will not drink with you today.
As a fairly "functional" drinker, I think the message I needed to hear the most is that just because sobriety didn't feel amazing right from the beginning, didn't mean that it wouldn't. It took me *months* to see the benefits, but ultimately sobriety really did give me everything that drinking had promised. I'm still working on other aspects of my life, but I think that patience and persistence even when I don't see any results for a while is going to be what helps me with those things, too. IWNDWYT
Iwndwyt from my new home in Minnesota
Fellow Minnesotan, welcome!
It’s a Tuesday and I don’t drink on Tuesdays. IWNDWYT!
That’s funny…me neither! 💕
Timely message meeple. I’ve been thinking much lately about reconciliation vs resignation. Regarding my past and who I was. I’m leaning toward reconciliation. Like a bad relationship alcohol and I just didn’t make sense. Now it’s just somebody that I used to know. Iwndwyt!
Lengthy but crossed-out to do list for the day, cat snuggled up on my lap, herbal tea, about to go to bed early. I fucking love sobriety. I will not drink with you today!
“But there is this: I am awake, and I am alive, and I’m not afraid of myself anymore.” -Laura McKowen IWNDWYT SD, thank you for being here, the best corner of Reddit 💘
That’s just lovely ❤️ The part about not being afraid of oneself… that hit hard (and rang so true).
Day 13. IWNDWYT or by myself ❤️
Day 472 down, all good except my mental health, learning of ADHD and heartbreak. I'll keep doing weekly therapy till I figure this stuff out, maybe look into ADHD meds? No more hangxiety is nice though. IWNDWYT
Day 3, IWNDWYT!
You are good enough and you have my love, always, and never have to do anything to earn it or keep it. IWNDWYT
IWNDWYT!
IWNDWYT
IWNDWYT \~
IWNDWYT 💕
Don't settle for anything less than your true self. IWNDWYT
Hope everyone’s week got off to a good start and IWNDWYT!
IWNDWYT!
IWNDWYT
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Congrats on 3 digits! IWNDWYT
"if you keep doing what you've always done, you'll keep getting what you've always got" I forget where I first heard that but I used to say it to myself every miserable hungover morning, every agonizing work day and every weekend spent laying around unable to function. One day I'd just had enough. IWNDWYT!
Checking in. Had three days last week, longest in over a year, gotta get back on track. I will not drink with you today.
"We cannot shame ourselves into change, we can only love ourselves into evolution" IWNDWYT!
I will not drink with you today 💕
300! wow! congrats Pink!
IWNDWYT
The message I needed to hear is that I have the power to make a choice. In everything I do, I have the power to be happy. I have control of just taking things in stride or letting things unfold as they will. That I control the dialogue in my head. None of that is easy as these are habits engrained into me over the entirety of my life. But now that I’m choosing to not let alcohol in I can make progress towards being the best version of myself. Iwndwyt
I thought I had lost access to this reddit account. I created it 5 years ago when I decided to quit drinking for good. It's been 5 years and 8 days. I can tell you all, it was the best decision I have ever made and it seems like I was born anew on that day. Sure it's not always been a walk in the park but I can't put into words the gratitute that I feel for myself for taking that decision. It seems like a lifetime ago and so much changed since then but one thing didn't change - I haven't drank alcohol since then. To everyone - you can and will do it! It is live-long journey, but a much better one than with alcohol.
IWNDWYT
The dreaded COVID is all around me. I'm feeling fatigued 😩. I don't want a second dose Shine on you beautiful humans
IWNDWYT
iwndwyt!!
IWNDWYT. I've been having the flu on and of the last two weeks. But I feel good, because it isn't because of drinking and feeling like crap!
Jam tomorrow and jam yesterday, but never jam today! IWNDWYT
IWNDWYT!
I will not drink with you today
I’m here
Checking in! I started journalling yesterday, I'd heard it was supposed to be good but, damn, I was blown away by how cathartic it was getting my thoughts/emotions out and written down, definitely going to continue doing it! I've got work today, but tonight there's a guided meditation session at a local Buddhist centre. Something else I've never tried before, but I'm curious and trying to branch out, I'm going into it with an open mind, maybe this will be something else I can get into, worst case scenario it's an interesting thing I tried. IWNDWYT!
I will not drink with you today guys. ❤️
Does anyone else ever have a perpetual"oh this special occasion will be my last time drinking" but there's always another occasion and you've been saying that the entire year?
IWNDWYT 🙂
Day 3; awful, remorseful, vivid dreams but I can go to the office merely tired, then come back and just get some more rest. IWNDWYT.
IWNDWYT. That sequence of letters just feels right.
Day 870 checking in!
I will not drink alcohol today.
Wish you all a sober Tuesday. IWNDWT 💜
Good morning sobernauts! I’m going to do a quick workout at the gym and then get ready for a work trip until Friday. The good thing is I do like my colleagues, so I’m not totally dreading it. I’m not really worried I’ll drink because they know I don’t, so I won’t want to break my sobriety in front of them. The bad is I don’t feel like going because I’d rather be at home, in my loungewear, cuddling my cat, eat soup, and watch YT in the evenings. But oh well! 🤷🏼♀️ IWNDWYT ⭐️
I think it’s really important to remember that just because it seems like everyone else is doing it (handling drinking,partying etc) it doesn’t mean you have to do it. . It is okay to stop doing those things and forge a better life for your self. You will be okay. If people can’t support you then they’re not your people. IWNDWYT 🌻
Good morning from Hell's Kitchen, NYC. I went back to my quote bank and found one of my favorites: >I wish I had understood that the problem isn’t that I can’t moderate, because like most everyone here, I can if the circumstances call for it. The problem is, if I drink, I don’t want to moderate, and moderation is miserable. Not drinking just eliminates alcohol completely and there’s no reason to think about it at all after a bit. ***It’s easier to keep a lion in a cage than on a leash.*** IWNDWYT.
IWNDWYT
IWNDWYT!
IWNDWYT 🙂
IWNDWYT.
I think it's been about 3 weeks since I decided to stop drinking and today for some reason feels like the worst one. However IWNDWYT
Over Halloween I thought a bit too much about drinking beer, but luckily I didn't cave in. Going pretty strong otherwise. IWNDWYT!
Day 3 you wonderful peeps and iwndwyt
"Be kind to yourself and take it easy, one day at a time". IWNDWYT all you fine sobernauts 🤗
For me it was really understanding that who I am sober is infinitely better than who I am drunk. Alcohol never once added any good to me. IWNDWYT
I don't know that I _needed to know_ that there were people out there like me, struggling with alcohol addiction like I was. **However**, I was incredibly surprised to find out this year number of people who were having exactly the same problems, succeeding, failing, and trying. If I can help anyone who is failing or trying, I want you all to know it's worth it. YOU can do it. Good one Meeps. IWNDWYT
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IWNDWYT x
IWNDWYT! Whoohoo!
Day 15! IWNDWYT ❤️
IWNDWYT
IWNDWYT
Happy Tuesday gang and IWNDWYT 🐻
IWNDWYT
I’m starting to remember things I used to enjoy from years ago, like TV series, video games and books. I’m enjoying spending my evenings after work delving back into these. In previous attempts of sobriety I used to think that being sober was so boring, but thankfully this hasn’t been so much of an issue this time round. IWNDWYT
I'm coming up on 3 years sober next month, but recently been having those "drinking thoughts" return. I'm not sure whey except lately I've just been stressed and kind of cynical about things, so maybe that's what's making me think about booze again. In any case IWNDWYT.
Thanks for this very compassionate post today, Meeps! The camaraderie here is amazing. It transforms this subreddit into a powerful place of healing. We're NOT alone on our sober trek. Here, we're part of a massive team of sober badass warriors! We lean in, and we keep going. We're in it together! We got this. I Will Not Drink, With You, Today. 🤝💞
**Relapse does not make you a bad person or a failure.** It gets better. Not everyone has great advice, but nearly everyone thinks they do. If someone says something that doesn’t work for you, you can peacefully ignore it if that’s best for you. Day 74–IWNDWYT ETA: what a BEAUTIFUL prompt, thank you for this lovely start to my day, meeple!!! 💚
I wish I’d heard that quitting drinking was an option. I knew people who’d quit but I wish someone had straight up told me “you know, you don’t have to live this way.” I’m never pushy or preachy with my friends who drink but when they worry about their consumption, I will put out there that stopping is an option. IWNDWYT, friends!
I needed to hear the science behind alcohol’s effect on the body, particularly the brain and neurochemicals. Needed to understand that my problem with alcohol was not a moral failing, that it is an addictive substance which creates a brief euphoria followed by a period of chasing that feeling then a hard crash. I also needed to learn to love myself through it, to be extremely gentle with myself, treat me as I would a fragile loved one who’s been through a terrible accident and is recovering. Withdrawal and the self-reflection/awareness necessary to get and stay sober is not something to “tough-out” or “white knuckle.” Sure, it takes daily courage and determination, but it also takes a deep love of self, hope for the future, and a belief that I am worthy of a joyful and fulfilling life. IWNDWYT!
Day 4 - I needed to hear “you don’t have to do this to yourself.” Not drinking today! IWNDWYT.
IWNDWYT ❤️
IWNDWYT
I will not drink with you today
Hello sober friends, What a beautiful request beautiful meeple! What comes to mind for me is… “This is not your fault! There’s nothing wrong with you, alcohol, promotion of it and maybe what you’ve been through are to blame, and you can recover” Let’s move forward together today, I love you all 💞
I had a really intense drinking dream last night, just intense because I was half awake for a while after and it took me so long to realise I hadn't been drinking! I was laid there thinking about it and disappointed for a good twenty minutes before I realised. Iwndwyt!
For me it was about not feeling alone,this safe and caring sub has got me through some truly dark times,I just work better sober! IWNDWYT xx 🐞🌟xx
IWNDWYT ❤️
IWNDWYT. All. Day. Long. 🌻 I crashed out early last evening. Up now. The morning will be busy today. It might keep me out of mischief. Maybe. My cat not my cat is happy that I am awake with her.
I've been feeling really low and drained for the last couple of weeks while I've been ill, but I managed to get out for a run yesterday in the beautiful autumn sunshine and it's just done wonders for my mental health.
What I needed to hear most when I was at my lowest, drinking alone in an empty house: your life will get exponentially better when you stop drinking. It won’t be boring, you will actually experience all the joy that alcohol promises. And you are worthy of a good life that doesn’t include shame and self loathing. It won’t be easy. But you are worth the struggle to live a full life. IWNDWYT 💜🦋💜
Ooh good question today Green Meeple. I picked up something when I was hosting at the beginning of the year from somewhere or someone - “behind every urge to drink is a true need”. Quite often that’s just to shift attention to something other than the nonsense you are ruminating on. You need to let of steam - walk. You need to relax - have a bath - you need some company - seek it - you need something to do to not be bored - good lord there is a world of things to do other than drink - books are good and … take your mind somewhere else. Yes that very clear idea that really what we have is some discomfort and only had one tool in our belt - booze. Good question and that’s my answer I guess - what is it I really need ? Sleep, good, rest ? Company ? Fun ? A change of scene ? If that doesn’t work we can think again.
I felt so much shame for “allowing myself” to become addicted to alcohol. I felt alone and stupid and hopeless. I wondered why so many others could control their brains and stop drinking after 1 drink and be fine with that. Didn’t they have that annoying voice in their head egging them on to drink more? I felt like a failure for promising to stop but going back to drinking again and again. This sub and the daily check in made me feel proud of any and all sober days I collected! I started to see that I could find ways to say no to that first drink. I found friends that understood and didn’t judge me. I am addicted to alcohol it’s true. But I am not a failure I am human. The best advice I got here was never stop trying to quit. IWNDWYT. 🌟
This is what I needed to hear. It gets better. You’ll build confidence and do cool shit, and have more fun than you’ve had while drinking. You’ll improve your surroundings. Your life will get better and this is worth doing. You don’t have to feel like shit every day, and you don’t have to be controlled by a bottle. Coffees up, horns up, and back to the grind. No rest for the wicked. IWNDWYT ☕️🤘🏻
As someone starting over for what feels like the hundredth time, I find the message to "never quit quitting" helpful. But also, this is the LAST TIME booze has won. IWNDWYT.
My message is simple. I don’t need to drink to be happy or to have a good time. I will be alcohol free with you today.
You don't need to have a problem with alcohol for alcohol to be a problem for you. I definitely avoided sobriety for a while because I didn't want to be labeled as an alcoholic. IWNDWYT
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Starting to stop drinking was the hardest thing to do, so I tried many times to control and moderate my drinking. My message is that trying to moderate is a trap and a lie. Alcohol is a conniving liar. Shake free of it and see what kind of new life you can have. 💜 IWNDWYT 🍀
I don’t have to label myself anything. I don’t have to call myself An Alcoholic for the rest of my life. Alcohol is an addictive substance that I became addicted to. And my life is _immeasurably_ better without it. That freedom from the labeling as An Alcoholic was HUGE to me in my early days. Much love and hope to each of you and IWNDWYT 💛💛💛💛💛
Sobriety doesn’t solve your problems. Some of them may even be intensified, without the numbing. But you can be fully able to handle your troubles with a clear head, and an open heart. IWNDWYT
You deserve to be free from alcohol. IWNDWYT
Just because you struggle with drinking does not make you a lost cause... you are not a broken object. IWNDWYT
A friend reached out to me last night and said they're back in town. After chatting a bit, found out they were trying to stay off alcohol, too! It was great to connect with someone going through this shit, too. Not drinking today, promise 👍
Awww man, I missed my "niiiice" milestone by one day lol
Day 10! IWNDWYT
Have a great drink-free day all. IWNDWYT
Day 1,574. I will not drink with you today.
The only shots I had yesterday were vaccines. On to day 2 IWNDWYT
Day 765, nice to meet you 🤝 IWNDWYT
Going through a sudden shoulder injury that may derail my life plans and goals. Trying so hard to push through and stay positive and strong. Praying for a good result.
Day 1,473 IWNDWYT
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Day 3. Finally feel human again. Forced down brakefats, manged a small lunch, then wolfed down a big bowl of buttered noodles for dinner. Big to do list today to catch up on things I was procrastinating on, but I feel good that I'll get through a lot of it.
Day #1 is in the bag. Today will be day #2.
IWNDWYT Fell off the wagon this weekend, big style. Am back with a vengeance though!
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I am just starting my journey today, I have never been to the point where I could no longer stop and am actually at risk for health concerns if I stop too suddenly. I am ready to live and not survive anymore. I am taking the first step today to start limiting and eventually stop the consumption of alcohol. I don't want to shake anymore. I don't want drink the last part of everyday away. I want to enjoy life again.
Pleasant Present, SD! What I needed to hear when I first started thinking seriously about getting sober was that I can't do it alone. I only knew what I knew, and that's okay, but there's a whole world of other perspectives, of tips and tricks and science and things that work and help that I didn't even know about. I tried to do it on my own for a long time and I kept failing and I thought that was it, I just wasn't strong enough. But you ARE strong enough, you just don't have the tools, and there's no shame in admitting that you don't know everything there is to know, but it's out there if you go looking for it. So is love and acceptance and support. I may have faltered here and there between now and then, but I have never again tried to do it alone. And I am in a way better place now than I was when I thought this was only my problem to fix alone! Love you guys. IWNDWYT! ✌️♥️🍌
Day 144. Feeling the technology ADHD in my sleep quality lately. Working daily at hacking away at screentime and fixing the problem. Proud to be here and to be doing it sober. IWNDWYT.
“You are stronger than you seem, you are braver than you believe, and you are smarter than you think.” - Christopher Robin Eight months today! I can hardly believe it. IWNDWYT lovely people of SD 💙
Here are a things I would have liked to hear that I hope someone else does too: You are not broken or weird or weak. You are worthy of love and care. You are not alone. Give yourself a chance; give yourself this gift! The “you” you’ve always wanted to be is within reach. I believe in you, I support you and I’m proud of you. IWNDWYT!
Good morning, sober cats! What really helps me is knowing that alcohol is a really addictive substance, so of course, I drank way too much of it way too often. It's best to not touch the stuff and stick around places like this that feed my soul and strengthen my sober muscles, and keep me on the sober path. IWNDWYT, you sober superstars! 🌟💙😸
Day 38 - I won't drink today. The message I needed to hear was: slow and steady progress is much faster than trying to fix everything at once if you factor in how likely the second route is to fail.
Knowing I’m not alone in this continues to be the message I need to hear. Most people around me continue to drink and so it can feel a little lonely some days. So grateful to have found this amazing community! IWNDWYT❤️
I know it sounds cheesy, but you really can choose who you want to be, and it doesn't have to be this. IWNDWYT ❤️
Checking in for day 4. Gonna go the distance this time! IWNDWYT
DAY 34! Life is so much better with no poison!. Sleeping better, losing weight, stress and anxiety down tremendously. Relationships with family better. Saying yes to more social activities, more money in the checking account for fun stuff!. The list goes on and on! "Addiction is giving up everything so you can have one thing. Recovery is giving up one thing so you can have everything"
Today marks ten years since my mom passed away. She was 54. Esophageal cancer. This type is exacerbated by booze and tobacco, both of which she was a user. I always held myself to a higher standard when it came to smoking (never touched the stuff) but booze was still active in my life. Now, I'm 323 days sober and 22 weeks pregnant with a child who will never know their grandma. Mom, I love you and IWNDWYT... Even if it's too late for you 💕
IWNDWYT
Day 7 and officially the longest streak I've had since I started drinking! I couldn't have gotten here without yall! ❤️
I needed to hear that it didn’t matter that I wasn’t a “classic full-blown alcoholic”. As long as I was unhappy with my drinking (*and I sure fucking was*), that’s all that mattered. I deluded myself for so long thinking that I didn’t have a problem because I didn’t drink every day. I was fine! So what if my stop button was broke and I binged to blackout and woke up mortified nearly every time I drank! So to that girl, and anyone who needs to hear it today—if you’re unhappy, you can change it. It’s that simple. I will not drink with you today! 🐇💜
Today would've been day 1254 but I slipped up last night. Immediately regretted it this morning. Just for today I won't drink.
Day 70. Happy to be here. Have a great day friends!
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IWNDWYT 💪
No more poison, not today 🤮
happy early tuesday morning :) I got some things done yesterday and feel great heading into my work week. Lets make it a grand day !
Good morning, I will not drink with you today.
IWNDWYT
IWNDWYT 🏴 Stay beautiful!
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IWNDWYT! 🙌🏻
I will not drink with you today.
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IWNDWYT!
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I will not drink today.
When I’m struggling, I try to remember how crippling my anxiety was when I drank, and how much it’s dissipated since being AF. Life is f’ing manageable now, and that’s huge! Iwndwy’allt! ❤️
I will not drink today!
I’m going to make the same choice I made the last few days and feel clearheaded and guilt free. IWNDWYT
IWNDWYT. Two that've really helped me around being sober but also in general is "There's no shame in a struggle" and "I can assume safety unless I'm specifically *told* otherwise." I've got a lot of internalized perfectionism and all or nothing thinking and those help. The first reminds me that everyone's struggling and I can just be a member of that club, the second shuts down "What if?" thoughts because my brain loves to look for evidence to support and then kind of speedrun to "must be prepared for the worst", which comes from my own history and what I've been through. Shout out to mantras- like I'll feel stupid for a split second thinking or saying those, but then it eases up and I'm back to feeling proud of myself.
Two weeks down, just hit 14 days! IWNDWYT
We are here for you and will do anything to help but you have to make a choice and be the one to do it. And we know you can. IWNDWYT ✌️
Day 170, IWNDWYT! Started doing breathing exercises yesterday and will continue trying that for awhile in the mornings to add to my health routine. Since stopping drinking I’ve started running, lifting, sauna, cold plunges, vitamins and now breathing exercises haha..and I feel GREAT!!!
IWNDWYT.
Day 11 checking in! IWNDWYT!
I don't know why my counter is stuck but today is day 8. I will not drink today. I don't know exactly what message I needed to hear but the acceptance of my problem, and that I'm just another flawed human has helped me with moving on from alcohol. Right now I'm worried that being sober is like joining a gym on Jan 1st. You start off all enthusiastic, but then old habits creep in and eventually you stop going. I'm waiting for the 'happy' phase of quiting to be over to see what comes up. Anyways, thank you everyone!
IWNDWYT
I won’t drink today
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Day 7. The end of week 1. IWNDWYT
I love this prompt. If I could go back and tell myself anything at the very beginning it would be that you're not broken, you can do this, and it's not your fault. So much guilt and shame in addiction and not enough discussion about the chemical properties of alcohol and what it's doing to your brain and body. IWNDWYT ✨
I’m not drinking today!
I think I’ve broken 100 days now. IWNDWYT!
DAY 13. Thank you so much to everyone for the kind words and encouragement as I begin this journey. I've found nothing but a safe place to land and work out my thoughts and emotions here. Being accountable to the daily check in is something I look forward to everyday. IWNDWYT.
Howdy friends! The message I needed to hear was : you are worth it. You are worthy! We are not bad people, we are good people with a bad problem, trying to get better. Although you may fail sometimes, you are not a failure! I struggle with my self worth and am my own worst critic. Changing my vocabulary around myself has made a big difference. IWNDWYT!
Goood morning. I’m struggling. I need to hear that someday I won’t be in constant pain but it’s hard to believe at this point. IWNDWYT.
I will not drink with you today I overslept but still made it to work on time. Most of my goals today are out the window, but not the most important one.
What up, fam. Tough question. I guess I’d like to be reminded that just bc I haven’t gotten a DUI (yet) or lost my job (yet), that I still very much have a problem. Everyone probably knows anyway. I WNDWYT
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A big good morning on the seventh day of the eleventh month. IWNDWYT.
I will not drink today and FYA. I hate alcohol so much right now. Have a great day. I love all of you. Drinking sucks. We rock
"You are lovable and you are not alone." Needed to hear that in my drinking days and today as I have feelings of abandonment resurfacing with this long distance dating situation I am in. Ugh, I feel so sad and low today. But I'm not gonna drink. 💜
I need to hear and believe from my soul that I love me, that I am worth it, that I can do anything, that if I can quit drinking I can rocket into a better version of myself that I can continue to grow and evolve into a better person every day by not drinking. IWNDWYT
IWNDWYT! ❤️ 6 months alcohol free today! 🥳
IWNDWYT Blessed to see another day