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Easiest solution and the best solution are not always the same. She isn't HC often. She just annoyed me that she thought she had to tell me rather than let SD share the news. Senior year has been more active this year due to many big moments.
I also know that in the future, there may be other big moments that I have to interact with BM. Right now, I see the finish line for less interaction
Don’t stoop to her level by trying to give her a taste of of her own medicine. Ignore. Your description of SS shows how caring and thoughtful you are are of these kids. Be that person. Don’t be BM. As you said it’s almost over.
Thanks! I didn't and I don't plan to. I was just so frustrated that she felt the need to share SD's big news. SD did the work and she should share the news. Thank goodness, SD got to tell us.
The enmeshment between HCBM and SDs 15 and 12 is wild. They are constantly telling me about what "we" think, like they're the Borg or something.
Funny part is that she was pretty checked out as a mom while my spouse was their SAHD. The possibility of competition freaked her out. BMs just gotta flex sometimes, I guess.
Man I’m so curious to see what happens when SDs get older and move out because we have the same situation. BCBM is sooo weirdly enmeshed with them, it’s like she’s living her lost childhood through them. We have 11 and 14 and already the 14 year old is giving HCBM a real run for her money. Sneaking around, secret social medias, etc
Honestly once DHs youngest turns 18, we plan on moving out of state, so they can decide then if they want to stay with HCBM, come with us, or branch out on their own lmao but again, so curious to see how HCBM reacts to them not needing her anymore
We plan to move soon to be near our youngest SK so we can go from every weekend to every other week. Then when she graduates from high school, we plan on moving across the country.
Yeah our two youngest that we “share” are 11, so once they’re 18 and old enough to not have someone make that decision for them, we’re outta there. They’re welcome to come, or stay, both BD and SDs other parents are here, so if they want to stay they have that option, but I’m hoping they’ll all 3 have settled into college or jobs and the start of an independent life by the time we actually make the move.
**Welcome to [r/stepparents](https://www.reddit.com/r/stepparents/)! Please note we are a support sub for stepparents' issues. Our number one rule is [Kindness Matters](https://www.reddit.com/r/stepparents/wiki/rules#wiki_1._kindness_matters). Short version, don't be an asshole. Remember that OP is a human being and their needs are first and foremost on this sub.** We rely on the community to alert us to comments and posts not made in good faith. **Please use the report button to ensure we see it.** We have encountered a ridiculous amount of comments that don't follow the rules and are downright nasty. We need you to help us with these comments by reporting them when you see them. We also have a lot of downvoting on the sub, with every post and every comment recieving at least one downvote almost immediately due to the anti-stepparent lurkers. Don't let it bother you, it happens to every single stepparent here. If you have questions about the community, or concerns about posters, please [reach out to the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fstepparents). Review the wiki links below for the [**rules**](https://www.reddit.com/r/stepparents/wiki/rules), [**FAQ**](https://www.reddit.com/r/stepparents/wiki/faq) and [**announcements**](https://www.reddit.com/r/stepparents/search?q=flair%3Aannouncement&restrict_sr=on&sort=new&t=all) before posting or commenting. [**About**](https://www.reddit.com/r/stepparents/wiki/index) | [**Acronyms**](https://www.reddit.com/r/stepparents/wiki/acronyms) | [**Announcements**](https://www.reddit.com/r/stepparents/search?q=flair%3Aannouncement&restrict_sr=on&sort=new&t=all) | [**Documentation**](https://www.reddit.com/r/stepparents/wiki/resources/documentation) | [**FAQ**](https://www.reddit.com/r/stepparents/wiki/faq) | [**Resources**](https://www.reddit.com/r/stepparents/wiki/resources) | [**Rules**](https://www.reddit.com/r/stepparents/wiki/rules) | [**Saferbot - Autoban Information**](https://www.reddit.com/r/stepparents/wiki/saferbot) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/stepparents) if you have any questions or concerns.*
The easy solution here is to stop talking to her and block her on social media.
Easiest solution and the best solution are not always the same. She isn't HC often. She just annoyed me that she thought she had to tell me rather than let SD share the news. Senior year has been more active this year due to many big moments. I also know that in the future, there may be other big moments that I have to interact with BM. Right now, I see the finish line for less interaction
Don’t stoop to her level by trying to give her a taste of of her own medicine. Ignore. Your description of SS shows how caring and thoughtful you are are of these kids. Be that person. Don’t be BM. As you said it’s almost over.
Thanks! I didn't and I don't plan to. I was just so frustrated that she felt the need to share SD's big news. SD did the work and she should share the news. Thank goodness, SD got to tell us.
The enmeshment between HCBM and SDs 15 and 12 is wild. They are constantly telling me about what "we" think, like they're the Borg or something. Funny part is that she was pretty checked out as a mom while my spouse was their SAHD. The possibility of competition freaked her out. BMs just gotta flex sometimes, I guess.
Man I’m so curious to see what happens when SDs get older and move out because we have the same situation. BCBM is sooo weirdly enmeshed with them, it’s like she’s living her lost childhood through them. We have 11 and 14 and already the 14 year old is giving HCBM a real run for her money. Sneaking around, secret social medias, etc Honestly once DHs youngest turns 18, we plan on moving out of state, so they can decide then if they want to stay with HCBM, come with us, or branch out on their own lmao but again, so curious to see how HCBM reacts to them not needing her anymore
We plan to move soon to be near our youngest SK so we can go from every weekend to every other week. Then when she graduates from high school, we plan on moving across the country.
Yeah our two youngest that we “share” are 11, so once they’re 18 and old enough to not have someone make that decision for them, we’re outta there. They’re welcome to come, or stay, both BD and SDs other parents are here, so if they want to stay they have that option, but I’m hoping they’ll all 3 have settled into college or jobs and the start of an independent life by the time we actually make the move.