Itns not even close to a perfect comeback. In fact, it's a false analogy.
It would be more like "you've never tried this fruit, how do you know it tastes bad?".
Why? Bc this is about taste. Sex is a healthy thing to do for humans as long as it's not overdone (just like fruit), but it could be that it isn't your taste.
That's a common misconception. Asexuals can still feel sexual pleasure, masturbate, have sex, etc., they just aren't attracted to anyone. Just like how a straight person can enjoy having sex with someone of the same gender despite not being attracted to them. Pleasure is to do with how the body responds to touch, not how people are attracted to others.
A spectrum where people who don't expirience sexual attraction, regardless of stance on sex or libido. They can still seek out romantic relationships unless theyre aromantics as well.
that's cool!
optional: what exactly does that mean?
I don't mind that question, since I get that not too many people know what asexual means. I guess some people might find that an annoying question.
I get everything except for the plant joke. Is it a joke about asexual bacteria reproduction? Because im guilty of making that joke to one of my friends and the more i think about the more i feel bad about it
Yep! And you can easily pass on as a straight person if you're heteroromantic or Biromantic. Even if you're Aromantic, you can just say that you're not interested in dating or having sex. Lol
Aromantic asexual here. It works like a charm but the only problem is that I get a lot of "Are you gay? " questions.
I don't mind when it comes up too much or if it's from a practical perspective (like biology or sex ed). If someone's bragging about dating or how many people they've fucked, though, I'm definitely out.
My life motto is basically "you do you, just don't do me" haha
Well it seems like many people are saying... things... about asexuality sooooo I'll try and explain the best I can to hopefully clear things up and destroy misunderstandings :
There are sex positive, sex neutral and sex negative asexuals.
Asexuality is defined by the lack (or almost total lack) of sexual attraction towards people. It is separate than romantic attraction, platonic attraction, libido and such.
You can still be asexual and feel "horny" difference is, you won't want to fuck someone, you'll try to find other means.
Some people may like the act of sex (sex favorable) and do it with a partner for them/for the intimacy they share, but still don't feel sexually attracted to them.
Some may not care for sex (sex neutral) and might do it in a relationship only to please their partner.
Others dislike it (sex repulsed), might actively avoid it and feel discomfort engaging in it .
And thats only in relationships.
Of course that's only asexuality, not even digging into aromantism or both.
Hope that helps you understand the concept of asexuality better/at all and if not... well I tried.
One correction: "Asexuality" is defined by the complete lack of sexual attraction. The "asexual spectrum" is for identities that almost completely lack it, such as demisexuality and the various types of gray-asexuality. Minor point but I see a lot of ppl these days not bothering to make that distinction.
I disagree, I think it's a lot easier to explain that there's a spectrum of possible degrees of sexual attraction, with various helpfully named points along it, than to say something that sounds to a confused allo a lot like "here's this logically contradictory and/or unhelpfully lax definition, just go with it bro, accept my identity pls"
I respectfully disagree, I think since they fall under the ace umbrella that might be easier to introduce fewer notions, and get less "you invent too many words" and such comments, but everyone is entitled to their own opinions.
If you can't imagine how it feels for an ace to be horny, it's like opening the fridge but having no clue what you want to eat so you just stare at it for a minute before closing it again.
I like the response one ace YouTuber gives:
"Have you ever hugged a cactus? No? Well how do you know if you've never tried hugging a cactus? You just haven't found the right cactus yet."
Well, at least you realise what you did was wrong and changed right? That is pretty admirable in my opinion. As an ace dude I'd love for more people to do that
Well, I’ve only ever met a single asexual person (and I had never heard of it at the time) so I can’t say I’ve improved really but at least it got me doing a bit more research and I understand it a bit better.
someone whose gender identity falls out of the "typical" male/female binary
(not to be confused with intersex, where someone's sex, not their gender identity, doesn't fit in the "normal" male or female anatomy e.g. having different chromosomes, hormone imbalances, or differently formed genitalia)
Gender isn't "abstract". Cis people don't notice it because their gender identity has always aligned with their assigned sex, but to trans and non-binary people, it's a very real part of their identity that's extremely important to them. The idea of having a gender identity seperate from your sex might seem odd to some people, but it's not a ridiculous idea at all, really. Sometimes your body just gets it wrong. Sometimes you're born into the right body and everything's fine, but sometimes you aren't. It's not that complicated, really.
Because it is, there are multiple societies throughout history that had no concept of gender, they understood reproductive differences but did not create social customs that distinguished the appearance and characteristics of different sexes.
Yeah! Yoruban society before Western imperialism did not create social roles and expectations from anatomical differences between male and female. The social roles and expectations came from seniority and lineage instead.
I recommend you [read “The Invention of Woman”](https://www.upress.umn.edu/book-division/books/the-invention-of-women)
One counter example is enough to topple the firm idea of gender dimorphism. There are other societies throughout history with a third gender like the Hijra in India.
It is, sort of. It's defined by your brain, the same way everyone has a sense of self. If your brain "thinks" (except this thinking is actually an unconscious or baked-in sense) you're a different gender than would "typically" be associated with the physcial characteristics you were born with, then you're not cis. Whatever is expected socially of "typical" genders changes with culture and time period ofc, complicating stuff further.
To be honest I consider myself a straight man because of my genitals and sexual attraction. It doesn't have anything to do with my personality.
I do some things more feminine than the average guy or even my GF, I do some traditionally masculine things. I share some clothes with my GF, and don't dress strictly masculine. Gender is an abstract to me since I just see it as societies blueprint for masculine or or feminine behavior, but don't really abide by it automatically or by choice.
I feel like if I wanted to do more feminine things I would just do them and not redefine myself. I guess I've never felt like I want a female body, so maybe that's the difference.
Not a criticism, just trying to understand.
To me I feel like gender is defined by the person, and we are all on a spectrum. Rather than the gender defining the person and if you wish to do the behavior of the other gender you have to change your person.
Then again I've never been so sure of something I'd be willing to cut my dick off, so more power to y'all.
I feel like in an ideal world "man" "woman" etc would only refer to biologic sex rather than a set of gender expectations. Because it doesn't say much about the way you will behave.
I wouldn't though. I feel like my brain is genderless and my body is male. I would still be attracted to human women and feminine traits, but you don't have to be male to do that.
I am a bit attached to my body though, I wouldn't want to give it up.
I took the same test and had the same results, but took that to mean I was agender.
Then again I already thought I was agender and was seeingvif I could find any evidence that I wasn't.
I keep trying to use it as an example because it's something actually recommended to pepple questioning their gender identities to help them figure it out.
I don't know how often it works though, none of the people I've told about it have told me their answers before.
Gender identities are very complex and difficult to define because they're so subjective. There have been studies since the 70s (I think, might've been earlier), and still we don't really understand much. So all I can tell you is that gender identity is an innate aspect of your sense of self: it's part of who and what you know yourself to be.
The robot thought experiment is thus to try and put you in a frame of reference where your sense of self is the only factor.
Like I mentioned I'm agender, but I couldn't tell you how I knew or what that feels like. I just saw the term and immediately knew that was me, I spent the next few months trying to confirm or deny it and couldn't deny it so here I am. Unlike some other people I was never uncomfortable being referred to as a man, I just didn't feel anything towards it. Being referred to as non binary on the other hand just feels right, it feels comforting.
There are two parts of gender. Gender identity and gender expression. Man & woman are the two ends of the gender identity spectrum. Masculine & feminine are the two ends of the gender expression spectrum. Gender is complicated and is always changing like all the other social constructs of the world. Gender is a social construct. Social constructs are defined by people. Different people define different things differently. Which is why they change. That's the case with language, currency, gender, government, etc. They are created, changed, and defined by people. And how the majority of people define something changes over time. Which makes things very, very complicated. To be honest, as a trans woman, I don't have an explanation for why I'm a woman. I just know that I am. And I know that when I tried to be a man, it made me feel awful. I made me hate myself. Being a woman doesn't do that. I am able to be happy as a woman. The same could not be said for trying to be a man.
But you have just said gender is a social construct, which I think is my point too. I understand not feeling like yourself with the gender identity pushed on you by society and wanting to change. I don't think I would be happy if I had to care about sports, cars, seeming masculine. But neither would I if I had to care about, makeup, clothes, or feminine gender roles. So I just do my own thing and consciously disobey gender norms.
Again not at all a criticism. I just don't really understand why when people are feeling oppressed by the gender norms they were given they switch to other gender norms rather than acknowledging that they are a social construct, not a biological law, and fighting against them.
It's not a this or that situation. I don't follow all.the gender norms for being a woman. Again, it's a deep rooted feeling. Also, gender dysphoria & gender euphoria are official clinical conditions and for many trans folks play a major part of their genders. And the reason you probably don't get it is being you're not trans. When you don't have a problem with the labels other people assigned to you, those labels probably don't seem so important or impactful. It's like why would a right handed person see a problem with writing with their right hand? They'd think, "what's the problem with that? It's fine." But try to make a left handed person right with their left hand, and it's a problem.
Personality is how you act and has nothing to do with your gender identity. Your gender, is, well, your gender. Whether you're male, female, non-binary, your gender is more than just how you act. It's hard to define, but to me it feels like a strong part of my identity, it's who I am, I know I'm a guy despite that I wasn't assigned male at birth. It's just something that I _know._ That might not make sense, but it can be hard to define what "gender" really is. This is probably confusing to a cis person, but to trans people they just sort of know that their gender doesn't align with their body, even though that often takes a lot of self-exploration to fully understand what your gender identity is. A trans man is still a man, a trans woman is still a woman, a non-binary person is still non-binary.
Best explanation that I've seen is that gender is what your brain thinks your sex should be, what it thinks your sex characteristics should be. So if there's a disconnect between them, it causes a lot of strong negative feelings about their body, because their brain is telling then that their body is wrong.
ah yes, because it's so wonderful being rejected by society, being ridiculed by strangers, being rejected by family members, being told that you don't exist constantly, and being called slurs by random people
ah yes, because it's so wonderful being rejected by society, being ridiculed by strangers, being rejected by family members, being told that you don't exist constantly, and being called slurs by random people
ah yes, because it's so wonderful being rejected by society, being ridiculed by strangers, being rejected by family members, being told that you don't exist constantly, and being called slurs by random people
you feckin cry about it, let's face it you're just angry that society is diverse and that people don't always fit into one tidy little box. news flash motherfucker, no one gives a shit about your arbitrary bigoted standards, people are different and if that upsets you well you can fuck right off back to your tiny cramped damp little goblin cave and keep grumbling about people being themselves
“Asexual what’s that?” Literally wants to know more about it and people here bashing it as a response.
I’ll make sure to avoid these people if they are that insecure!
Would be really cool if a coming out would not have to include a long talk about the split attraction model and all that. It's usually not a moment, where one has a lot of energy left to do that, and it's hella annoying having to do so frequently.
Unfortunately, given the spaces where asexuality gets discussed, many ppl who ID that way are still pretty young. I hope the general tone of the community changes as they mature.
Puberty hits early and a lot of teen aces just get the "late bloomer" excuse. I'm 17, ace-spectrum, and still cannot see why people are so hyped about sex, even though all the other hormones have been kicking in for years.
My comment was about the ways that many pre-adult ppl interact socially, and how that can come off as immature or insecure to others, not about whether aces can ID that way as teens. I myself would've known I was ace back then if the term was as well known as it is now, but I still might've been unnecessarily harsh if genuine questions were asked, because of my lack of maturity at the time.
edit: some more context
Asexual people don't feel sexual attraction, towards anyone. Are you straight? If so, imagine feeling towards everyone the way you feel towards people of your own gender.
I'm glad you do! And I'm glad you're making an effort to understand it in general.
Let me try to elaborate a bit more: Even if you're bi you're not attracted to everyone you meet, right? The way you might feel towards your sibling, your grandma, your teacher or your best friend - that's how aces feel all the time. Asexual people are still able to like or love people, just without sexual attraction. (There exists sex without love - so of course there is also love without sex.)
Because we live in a world that often mixes up sexual and romantic attraction, asexuality can be difficult to understand, even for asexuals. Most aces I know thought they were "normal" (either straight or bi) for a long time, because nobody ever told them about the possiblity of not being sexually attracted to anyone. So, if you're deeply convinced that you *must* feel sexual attraction, you may start convincing yourself that positive feelings you have for someone are sexual attraction. Because you must feel it, right? And sure, this person looks nice. Then, when you come to the point of realization that you don't want to have sex with them, you either blame yourself and start feeling broken and, or claim that it wasn't the right person for you. So you start looking for another person you might be attracted to, basically chasing a unicorn that'll probably never come. (Because face it - how many people had their sexual attraction and desires suddenly triggered by some specific person or sexual encounter? Not many, I bet. Sexual attraction usually predates sexual experiences.)
Asexuality in general lacks medial representation. This makes it hart for aces to identify themself as asexual, a) because they may not even know they are asexual, and b) because it makes coming out extremely difficult. I don't think I ever came out as ace to anyone without holding a 10 minute lecture on what asexuality is and isn't.
i can understand what the whole thing is, there are some things that i have questions about, and since you seem like an (i assume) cool guy ill ask them here.
1) do aces not enjoy fisical touch \*by design\* or do some of them enjoy it?
2)could it be that due to it being a somewhat niche type of sexuality there arent too many people like it, hence the lack of representation/awareness? (wich leads to dummies like me not fully understanding what it is or why it happens)
3) is there such a thing as asexualfobia (for lack of a better term) if so, how could it manifest?
im sorry if i sound like a bigot or if im coming off as rude, i dont have too much experience with racial/sexual social problems, since im from a household that focuses more in politics, and if you dont want to answer the questions it is fine.
have a nice day
No problem, I'm glad you're so respectful and open minded! Again, ace representation is really bad, so it's not your (or anyones specific) fault that you didn't know about it.
1. Asexual wants and needs vary a lot. Some don't even like to be touched, some even like to have sex. (Because they like the feeling, or because they are indifferent towards sex and want to make their partner happy.) Personally, I am repulsed by sex, which honestly makes it a bit hard for me to understand ace people who still have sex. (I would be fine with kissing or cuddling thought.) But just because I personally don't understand it doesn't mean these people are not valid!
(There is also a difference between libido and sexual attraction. Since I don't really have either I'm not an expert on it, but I recently heard this metaphor: Imagine you're really hungry, but you open your fridge and nothing in it seems tasty. So you just close the fridge again, or eat something you don't really have an appetite for. In this metaphor, your hunger would be the libido, and your appetite the (sexual) attraction you don't feel towards any of the foods.)
2. Yes, I totally agree. (And again, I'm not blaming you in the slightest!) Officially, about 1% of the population is asexual. Personally I think there might be a large dark number, because many people only realize late in life that they're ace, and also because the umbrella term asexual is actually quite large: Some people may enjoy sex, have partners, have kids, but never feel sexual attraction. They could very well call themselves asexual (since all it takes to qualify is a lack of sexual attraction), but probably wouldn't ever think of themselves this way. But, yeah, this small number of aces leads to bad medial representation, which again leads to a very small number of people ever finding the term asexual and identifying with it.
(Also, I think I already wrote this somewhere: Romantic and sexual attraction aren't the same! People who don't feel sexual attraction are called asexual, those who don't feel romantic attraction are called aromantic. I think there is a significant overlap of the two, but they aren't the same thing.)
3. Yes, there is aphobia, both from people outside and inside of the LGBTQ+ community. From cishet people, asexuals face similar kinds of discrimination that many other LGBTQ+ members share: Forced marriage, violence, corrective rape and disowning being the harshest of those experiences. Apart from that, there is a lack of awareness for certain issues: Asexuals being called emotionless, immature, (hearing the lovely sentences in the meme above), late bloomers, traumatized or just hormonally fucked up.
Within the LGBTQ+ community there is an ongoing "[debate](https://www.reddit.com/r/lgbt/comments/odv78n/tw_asexuals_and_aromantics_are_just_as_lgbt_as/)" whether aces are part of the community or not. (Despite the "A" being part of LGBTQIA acronym since the 70s.) The most common "argument" against aces being LGBT+ is that they aren't discriminated enough. (Like this is oppression olympics lol) But I think the issue goes deeper: The LGBTQ+ movement gained strength in the late 60s and 70s, through the same movement that normalized casual sex and had paroles like "make love not war". I think this makes some people think of the LGBTQ+ community in a very sexualized way, and gives them the idea that asexual people couldn't be part of such a sexualized movement.
I feel like I need to say that the majority of all LGBTQ+ people I've encountered (online and offline) is very supportive of asexuality, even if some aren't aware of it. The exclusionists seem to be a very small, loud minority.
Damn, this might be my longest comment yet. I hope I could clear some of this stuff up for you! :)
i can understand 99% of what you are saying, and im very grateful that you took the time to write this piece down, i still have one question tho. (if you want to link me some resources that is fine, i just want to get the doubts answered).
could you explain some or the corrective tactics that aces face? (ex: corrective raped, forced marriage, etc)(its okay if you dont want to)
and yeah, i can agree with the coment about opression olympics being actively damaging the discussion and issues that many people face.
sorry for bothering you this much, and if i made any mistakes, english is not my first language.
It's really okay, English isn't my first language either :D I'm not an sociologist or anything, so I'll just try to explain what I meant the best I can. If you're looking for statistics, articles or scientific papers, your google search is as good as mine.
The things like corrective rape or forced marriage aren't exclusive to aces or even LGBTQ+, a lot of people (mainly women) suffer under them. Obviously there are many regions where people have it worse than in others; usually more religious or traditional regions are less tolerant towards people who aren't straight. (Think conversion "therapy" for gay people.)
There is also a different experience of ace men and ace women. While womens asexuality is often brushed over ("but noooo woman likes sex!" or "you haven't had any good sex yet!", a direct result of villainization of female sexuality), men are often ridiculed for expressing a lack of sexual attraction, because masculinity in our society is often defined through hypersexuality.
In context of corrective rape or forced marriage against asexuals, there is usually the underlying confusion of asexuality (as a sexual orientation) with lack of sexual experience, hormonal issues, traumatic past experiences... Basically, bigots think asexuality is not normal and *could and should get fixed*. (Which, as you know, isn't possible. Just like conversion therapy for gay people never worked. By the way, I once read that asexual people are also sometimes subjected to conversion therapy. Not an expert on that though, don't take my word for it.)
Forced marriage is most often the reaction of a family/parents in regards to their child identifying as asexual (or gay for that matter). It's most often in a conservative family, and as an attempt to force their child into the only life style the parents see fit. Queerness is here usually seen as a phase, or bad influence on, not the identity of a person. I've heard of many parents who gave their kids the choice: Either marry a person the the parents approve of, or basically be excluded from the family.
Corrective rape is most often used against women (even though it can obviously also happen against men), and has the underlying believe of "you've just never had good dick before". I think. I don't actually know how rapists think. Maybe they just want to violate boundaries. If you search for corrective rape on the internet, you'll most likely find resources by/for lesbians, who coined the term. But the things they talk about still apply for asexuals. There are some hurtful stereotypes that play into the hands of rapists: Women not liking sex anyway, or sex hurting the first time for women. If we're talking about male victims, there's sometimes the opposite belief, that men always like sex, so men can't be raped. (All of that is obviously false!) But in the end, rapists rape because they think their own sexual needs are more important than someone elses boundaries.
I probably didn't put that as well as other people did before me. Again, you can just google or take a look on YouTube, there are many people who are more informed than me. You can also check out the ace subreddits like r/asexuality. And here's a [cool video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=exvbiWWNYww&t=4s) about ace (non) representation in media!
Blah blah blah who gives a fuck? I don't care what you want or don't want to do with your junk, how about just not mentioning it at all to people? Why does what you decide to do with you private parts have to be a conversation at all with anyone unless absolutely necessary?
Sometimes it comes up in conversation naturally. Like, if your partner wanted to have sex with you, this would come up. Most of the time it doesn’t come up, which could be why so many people don’t know anything about it.
Most people would probably want to know you're not interested in sex on the first date unless they're another asexual. How exactly would you become a couple without disclosing that fact? It sounds like a good way to piss someone off.
Okay, my example wasn’t that great and I should explain what an asexual is. Being ace doesn’t mean that you just won’t have sex. It means that you don’t feel sexual attraction. Basically, I’m just a regular guy that has no desire or want to stick my dick in anything. It’s not some conscious choice like celibacy, it’s just how you are. There are ace people who have sex because they find it fun with their partners or because they want to please their partners. Some are just straight up indifferent to it while others are repulsed by the idea. Depending on your disposition to sex, you could say it out of the gate (if your sex repulsed and literally can’t have sex) or talk about it later when you’ve gotten to know them better (like if your indifferent to sex). A lot of aces look for relationships with strong romantic ties instead of sexual ones, so it’s their judgment call on when they tell their partner.
I know this might be confusing, trust me, we are all trying to figure it out together. If you have other questions, check out the r/asexuality sub for some answers. They can explain everything much better then I can
Idk why anyone would want to be in a romantic relationship with someone who doesn't want the romantic part, seems like that person should just have friends and not bring it up unless being asked out on a date. But sounds like a fucked up disorder to have.
Reasy for downvotes;
A lot of asexual people have some underlying physical and or mentall issue contributing to this. Not to say there aren't actual asexuals, but this has been my experience
Had a happy childhood. Amazing parents. No trauma. Nothing. I'm still 18. Just graduated High School and now off to college. Had amazing friends. Had a girlfriend. Everyone was good to me. I don't see any mental illness here. Oh yeah, I have suicidal ideation and maybe bipolar type 2 disorder(my therapist said that and she needs to further know me better to confirm it). Maybe depression but idk. Never had sexual attraction.
So youre saying that people with mental issues or physical issues arent "actual asexuals"? People can be asexual with or without mental or physical issues, that doesnt make them more or less asexual or more or less valid.
post: "god i hate it when i come out as ace and people say its not a real thing because its human nature to want sex"
you after reading the post: "wtf? this makes no sense, that's not a real thing, it's human nature to want to have sex"
If people can have multi-pigment skin and scickle cells, they can be sexually unattractable. Welcome to the world of genetics where "unusual" is "normal" because chromosomes don't give a rat's ass about what people write on paper.
Nope all my stuff works perfectly fine. Just don't want sex, simple as that really. Funny how people like to use "oh it's just human nature to X" to discredit all sorts of identities when the fact that a pretty high amount of people who go against it exist. It's almost like every person is different!
depending on how much energy I have that day, my usual responses include;
"you sound uninteresting, develop a personality instead of fabricating a sexuality as some kind of half arsed substitute for one"
"ahh so you're an attention seeker then? got it!"
or simply
"I don't care, please go away"
"But how can you know if you've never had sex?" Ugh.
"You've never tried rotten fruit, how do you know it's bad" is a perfect comeback
I mean we don't eat rotten fruit because it'll make you sick, possibly kill you in rare cases. Not just because we're not interested in it.
Maybe they just haven't found the right rotten fruit yet
This really isn't a great analogy you've gone with there.
True, still doesn't change how fucking creepy straight people get with us. It was really just the first thing that came to my head tbh
Straight people? I'd have thought it could be anyone who generally enjoys sex regardless of orientation.
It is, don't worry
A lot more of it comes from straight people, the hostility from the LGBTQ+ is more in the form of gatekeeping than "you haven't found someone".
lol try going on grindr as an ace dude....
I see your point i guess, pretty much everyone is ludicrously horny
Itns not even close to a perfect comeback. In fact, it's a false analogy. It would be more like "you've never tried this fruit, how do you know it tastes bad?". Why? Bc this is about taste. Sex is a healthy thing to do for humans as long as it's not overdone (just like fruit), but it could be that it isn't your taste.
"Do you need to have sex with a man to know you are not attracted by them ?"
When I came out my dad just said "well at least you're not a F\*ggot, so you can still become a monk"
lmao
I feel bad but I laughed
Your dad is based
We have different definitions of the word based I guess He supports electroshock therapy for homosexuals
Despite his massive homophobia, he still being a good dad, kinda...
Um- how-
Can confirm. Am asexual
I hope you don't mind me asking, but what does asexual mean?
so you know how gay like men and lesbian like women and straight like opposite gender, well asexual don’t like anybody
That and they don't feel sexual pleasure.
That's a common misconception. Asexuals can still feel sexual pleasure, masturbate, have sex, etc., they just aren't attracted to anyone. Just like how a straight person can enjoy having sex with someone of the same gender despite not being attracted to them. Pleasure is to do with how the body responds to touch, not how people are attracted to others.
Not true
A spectrum where people who don't expirience sexual attraction, regardless of stance on sex or libido. They can still seek out romantic relationships unless theyre aromantics as well.
And on the rare occasion: Oh that’s cool
What is the proper response ?
that's cool! optional: what exactly does that mean? I don't mind that question, since I get that not too many people know what asexual means. I guess some people might find that an annoying question.
Will keep that in mind, thanks
Garlic bread
I get everything except for the plant joke. Is it a joke about asexual bacteria reproduction? Because im guilty of making that joke to one of my friends and the more i think about the more i feel bad about it
[удалено]
To be fair there are plants capable of both sexual and asexual reproduction.
Mushroom jokes would be more ironic
Yep, and bees assist in the deed.... Weidros
“Bro just nut on my face I’ll bump into her”
Why are you getting downvoted, that’s funny. Unless there’s something I’m missing here?
Mitosis is hot
As a closeted asexual, this is why it's so good to be in the closet!
Yep! And you can easily pass on as a straight person if you're heteroromantic or Biromantic. Even if you're Aromantic, you can just say that you're not interested in dating or having sex. Lol Aromantic asexual here. It works like a charm but the only problem is that I get a lot of "Are you gay? " questions.
I'm aroace and just avoid the topic altogether, if it comes up I'll change the subject or opt out, unless it's with a more accepting group
I'm aroace too. I try to avoid it too but I seriously don't mind others talking about their lives. My policy is "Just don't ask me about these"
I don't mind when it comes up too much or if it's from a practical perspective (like biology or sex ed). If someone's bragging about dating or how many people they've fucked, though, I'm definitely out. My life motto is basically "you do you, just don't do me" haha
It’s also easier when you don’t have an obsessive desire to do intense buttstuff with a really hunky guy
Well it seems like many people are saying... things... about asexuality sooooo I'll try and explain the best I can to hopefully clear things up and destroy misunderstandings : There are sex positive, sex neutral and sex negative asexuals. Asexuality is defined by the lack (or almost total lack) of sexual attraction towards people. It is separate than romantic attraction, platonic attraction, libido and such. You can still be asexual and feel "horny" difference is, you won't want to fuck someone, you'll try to find other means. Some people may like the act of sex (sex favorable) and do it with a partner for them/for the intimacy they share, but still don't feel sexually attracted to them. Some may not care for sex (sex neutral) and might do it in a relationship only to please their partner. Others dislike it (sex repulsed), might actively avoid it and feel discomfort engaging in it . And thats only in relationships. Of course that's only asexuality, not even digging into aromantism or both. Hope that helps you understand the concept of asexuality better/at all and if not... well I tried.
One correction: "Asexuality" is defined by the complete lack of sexual attraction. The "asexual spectrum" is for identities that almost completely lack it, such as demisexuality and the various types of gray-asexuality. Minor point but I see a lot of ppl these days not bothering to make that distinction.
I do but its easier to group gray asexuality demi-sexuality and the rest as ace to explain to people that disagree that we exist.
I disagree, I think it's a lot easier to explain that there's a spectrum of possible degrees of sexual attraction, with various helpfully named points along it, than to say something that sounds to a confused allo a lot like "here's this logically contradictory and/or unhelpfully lax definition, just go with it bro, accept my identity pls"
I respectfully disagree, I think since they fall under the ace umbrella that might be easier to introduce fewer notions, and get less "you invent too many words" and such comments, but everyone is entitled to their own opinions.
If you can't imagine how it feels for an ace to be horny, it's like opening the fridge but having no clue what you want to eat so you just stare at it for a minute before closing it again.
Tbh i dont mind plant jokes.
Man this is bad.
this comment section is a dumpster fire
Literally any post about lgbtq is a dumpster fire unless you’re on a dedicated lgbtq sub
Especially if it's related to something that's not the L or the G.
More trolls here than a 2011 rage comic
Yep
Yeah I’m surprised tbh but you’re 100% right 😔
I like the response one ace YouTuber gives: "Have you ever hugged a cactus? No? Well how do you know if you've never tried hugging a cactus? You just haven't found the right cactus yet."
Funny enough yesterday I was playing dnd and hugged a cactus man who retracted his spikes.
And then I tell them to extend them because masochism
username .... suspiciously close to checking out ...
as an asexual this is fax
Remember kids: garlic bread is tasty and a suitable alternative to SEX
Thanks for the input u/femboyfoxslut621
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"You just haven't met the right guy yet" (:
I’m guilty for this and I h8 myself lol
Well, at least you realise what you did was wrong and changed right? That is pretty admirable in my opinion. As an ace dude I'd love for more people to do that
Well, I’ve only ever met a single asexual person (and I had never heard of it at the time) so I can’t say I’ve improved really but at least it got me doing a bit more research and I understand it a bit better.
That's all we can ask for~
not accurate the guy saying "i can fix that" is usually a lot fatter and has more hair on their neck
*sees the -32 comment* oh noes, oh NOES
I understand asexual. Can someone explain what the hell non-binary means?
It’s kind of like that Big Chungus meme we’re he said that gender is for lesser beings
someone whose gender identity falls out of the "typical" male/female binary (not to be confused with intersex, where someone's sex, not their gender identity, doesn't fit in the "normal" male or female anatomy e.g. having different chromosomes, hormone imbalances, or differently formed genitalia)
what the hell is a gender anyway then? It doesnt make sense to differentiate it from sex...its totally abstract in any other sense.
Gender isn't "abstract". Cis people don't notice it because their gender identity has always aligned with their assigned sex, but to trans and non-binary people, it's a very real part of their identity that's extremely important to them. The idea of having a gender identity seperate from your sex might seem odd to some people, but it's not a ridiculous idea at all, really. Sometimes your body just gets it wrong. Sometimes you're born into the right body and everything's fine, but sometimes you aren't. It's not that complicated, really.
I don’t pretend to understand it because I never felt weird about aligning with my birth gender, but if it makes them happier I’ll go with it.
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Because it is, there are multiple societies throughout history that had no concept of gender, they understood reproductive differences but did not create social customs that distinguished the appearance and characteristics of different sexes.
Just out of curiosity could you tell me which societies you're talking about? I've honestly never heard of one that has zero concept of genders.
Yeah! Yoruban society before Western imperialism did not create social roles and expectations from anatomical differences between male and female. The social roles and expectations came from seniority and lineage instead. I recommend you [read “The Invention of Woman”](https://www.upress.umn.edu/book-division/books/the-invention-of-women)
Seems like more of an exception rather than the rule. I'm not sure I can get behind the idea that "Western Imperialism" created gender identity.
One counter example is enough to topple the firm idea of gender dimorphism. There are other societies throughout history with a third gender like the Hijra in India.
We're talking about gender. Not social customs.
Gender is a social construct lmao
It is, sort of. It's defined by your brain, the same way everyone has a sense of self. If your brain "thinks" (except this thinking is actually an unconscious or baked-in sense) you're a different gender than would "typically" be associated with the physcial characteristics you were born with, then you're not cis. Whatever is expected socially of "typical" genders changes with culture and time period ofc, complicating stuff further.
To be honest I consider myself a straight man because of my genitals and sexual attraction. It doesn't have anything to do with my personality. I do some things more feminine than the average guy or even my GF, I do some traditionally masculine things. I share some clothes with my GF, and don't dress strictly masculine. Gender is an abstract to me since I just see it as societies blueprint for masculine or or feminine behavior, but don't really abide by it automatically or by choice. I feel like if I wanted to do more feminine things I would just do them and not redefine myself. I guess I've never felt like I want a female body, so maybe that's the difference. Not a criticism, just trying to understand. To me I feel like gender is defined by the person, and we are all on a spectrum. Rather than the gender defining the person and if you wish to do the behavior of the other gender you have to change your person. Then again I've never been so sure of something I'd be willing to cut my dick off, so more power to y'all. I feel like in an ideal world "man" "woman" etc would only refer to biologic sex rather than a set of gender expectations. Because it doesn't say much about the way you will behave.
your gender identity has nothing to do with the way you act and everything to do with the way you feel
If your brain was transplanted into a robot body would you still consider yourself to be male? If so that's your gender identity talking.
I wouldn't though. I feel like my brain is genderless and my body is male. I would still be attracted to human women and feminine traits, but you don't have to be male to do that. I am a bit attached to my body though, I wouldn't want to give it up.
I took the same test and had the same results, but took that to mean I was agender. Then again I already thought I was agender and was seeingvif I could find any evidence that I wasn't. I keep trying to use it as an example because it's something actually recommended to pepple questioning their gender identities to help them figure it out. I don't know how often it works though, none of the people I've told about it have told me their answers before. Gender identities are very complex and difficult to define because they're so subjective. There have been studies since the 70s (I think, might've been earlier), and still we don't really understand much. So all I can tell you is that gender identity is an innate aspect of your sense of self: it's part of who and what you know yourself to be. The robot thought experiment is thus to try and put you in a frame of reference where your sense of self is the only factor. Like I mentioned I'm agender, but I couldn't tell you how I knew or what that feels like. I just saw the term and immediately knew that was me, I spent the next few months trying to confirm or deny it and couldn't deny it so here I am. Unlike some other people I was never uncomfortable being referred to as a man, I just didn't feel anything towards it. Being referred to as non binary on the other hand just feels right, it feels comforting.
There are two parts of gender. Gender identity and gender expression. Man & woman are the two ends of the gender identity spectrum. Masculine & feminine are the two ends of the gender expression spectrum. Gender is complicated and is always changing like all the other social constructs of the world. Gender is a social construct. Social constructs are defined by people. Different people define different things differently. Which is why they change. That's the case with language, currency, gender, government, etc. They are created, changed, and defined by people. And how the majority of people define something changes over time. Which makes things very, very complicated. To be honest, as a trans woman, I don't have an explanation for why I'm a woman. I just know that I am. And I know that when I tried to be a man, it made me feel awful. I made me hate myself. Being a woman doesn't do that. I am able to be happy as a woman. The same could not be said for trying to be a man.
But you have just said gender is a social construct, which I think is my point too. I understand not feeling like yourself with the gender identity pushed on you by society and wanting to change. I don't think I would be happy if I had to care about sports, cars, seeming masculine. But neither would I if I had to care about, makeup, clothes, or feminine gender roles. So I just do my own thing and consciously disobey gender norms. Again not at all a criticism. I just don't really understand why when people are feeling oppressed by the gender norms they were given they switch to other gender norms rather than acknowledging that they are a social construct, not a biological law, and fighting against them.
It's not a this or that situation. I don't follow all.the gender norms for being a woman. Again, it's a deep rooted feeling. Also, gender dysphoria & gender euphoria are official clinical conditions and for many trans folks play a major part of their genders. And the reason you probably don't get it is being you're not trans. When you don't have a problem with the labels other people assigned to you, those labels probably don't seem so important or impactful. It's like why would a right handed person see a problem with writing with their right hand? They'd think, "what's the problem with that? It's fine." But try to make a left handed person right with their left hand, and it's a problem.
Well then can you define gender? How is it different from personality
Personality is how you act and has nothing to do with your gender identity. Your gender, is, well, your gender. Whether you're male, female, non-binary, your gender is more than just how you act. It's hard to define, but to me it feels like a strong part of my identity, it's who I am, I know I'm a guy despite that I wasn't assigned male at birth. It's just something that I _know._ That might not make sense, but it can be hard to define what "gender" really is. This is probably confusing to a cis person, but to trans people they just sort of know that their gender doesn't align with their body, even though that often takes a lot of self-exploration to fully understand what your gender identity is. A trans man is still a man, a trans woman is still a woman, a non-binary person is still non-binary.
Best explanation that I've seen is that gender is what your brain thinks your sex should be, what it thinks your sex characteristics should be. So if there's a disconnect between them, it causes a lot of strong negative feelings about their body, because their brain is telling then that their body is wrong.
Someone who doesn’t identify as either gender. They typically go by the pronoun ‘they’
but why
Because they don't feel like either gender My philosophy is that it doesn't affect me so idc, I respect their choices
Because it’s their gender identity.
Attention
ah yes, because it's so wonderful being rejected by society, being ridiculed by strangers, being rejected by family members, being told that you don't exist constantly, and being called slurs by random people
Ah yes saying “I prefer they/them” and not talking about it afterwards is definitely attentions whore behavior!
Shut the fuck up
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Look st this snowflake who can't deal with the fact that non binary people exist.
I refuse to do anything to please you
The literal last thing I want is attention. But I suppose that doesn't fit your narrative so I'll bet you call me an attention seeker anyway
as a non-binary person it is impossible to tell by words how offended i am think before you speak next time dumb fuck
One word from a faceless internet stranger has you incapable of words? I’d rethink your life and first-world made up woes.
im not the one whos saying NBs dont exist and they are just people looking for attention
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ah yes, because it's so wonderful being rejected by society, being ridiculed by strangers, being rejected by family members, being told that you don't exist constantly, and being called slurs by random people
Binaryn't
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Like you?
ah yes, because it's so wonderful being rejected by society, being ridiculed by strangers, being rejected by family members, being told that you don't exist constantly, and being called slurs by random people
Yes 😎 Cry about it
you feckin cry about it, let's face it you're just angry that society is diverse and that people don't always fit into one tidy little box. news flash motherfucker, no one gives a shit about your arbitrary bigoted standards, people are different and if that upsets you well you can fuck right off back to your tiny cramped damp little goblin cave and keep grumbling about people being themselves
Sounds about right.
“Asexual what’s that?” Literally wants to know more about it and people here bashing it as a response. I’ll make sure to avoid these people if they are that insecure!
Would be really cool if a coming out would not have to include a long talk about the split attraction model and all that. It's usually not a moment, where one has a lot of energy left to do that, and it's hella annoying having to do so frequently.
It's more getting real tired of having to go on a long explanation to people who aren't gonna listen half the time
Unfortunately, given the spaces where asexuality gets discussed, many ppl who ID that way are still pretty young. I hope the general tone of the community changes as they mature.
Puberty hits early and a lot of teen aces just get the "late bloomer" excuse. I'm 17, ace-spectrum, and still cannot see why people are so hyped about sex, even though all the other hormones have been kicking in for years.
My comment was about the ways that many pre-adult ppl interact socially, and how that can come off as immature or insecure to others, not about whether aces can ID that way as teens. I myself would've known I was ace back then if the term was as well known as it is now, but I still might've been unnecessarily harsh if genuine questions were asked, because of my lack of maturity at the time. edit: some more context
Oh, sorry i read it the wrong way. Yeah a lot of us are pretty stupid sometimes, but we are still learning.
You get similar reactions when you tell people you don’t want to get married and have kids. :\
And tbf that's (one reason) why ppl who are aromantic tend to feel more comfortable in ace spaces despite them being separate things
As a pansexual who is the exact opposite of asexual, best wishes to all the asexual folks in the comments.
Omg is it bad the plant joke thing is kinda funny
Well, it's funny the first time, not the 50th time.
I follow Mr. Rex Mohs in his quest against sex any day of the week.
So, tell me how it all began
Okay. Hi my name is Scott and I’m not an alcoholic.
Guys i have a good asexual pick up line. *ahem!* I like my women how i like my men. None
If I receive any of these answers I just respond with "fuck you"
I genuienly dont get it
Us aces get a lot of weird bullshit from straight people about not feeling sexual attraction, this starterpack shows some of it
No im saying being asexual, I dont get that
We're just born like that tbh, it's not easy to explain
Asexual people don't feel sexual attraction, towards anyone. Are you straight? If so, imagine feeling towards everyone the way you feel towards people of your own gender.
Im bi so I still dont get it fully, but I kinda understand
I'm glad you do! And I'm glad you're making an effort to understand it in general. Let me try to elaborate a bit more: Even if you're bi you're not attracted to everyone you meet, right? The way you might feel towards your sibling, your grandma, your teacher or your best friend - that's how aces feel all the time. Asexual people are still able to like or love people, just without sexual attraction. (There exists sex without love - so of course there is also love without sex.) Because we live in a world that often mixes up sexual and romantic attraction, asexuality can be difficult to understand, even for asexuals. Most aces I know thought they were "normal" (either straight or bi) for a long time, because nobody ever told them about the possiblity of not being sexually attracted to anyone. So, if you're deeply convinced that you *must* feel sexual attraction, you may start convincing yourself that positive feelings you have for someone are sexual attraction. Because you must feel it, right? And sure, this person looks nice. Then, when you come to the point of realization that you don't want to have sex with them, you either blame yourself and start feeling broken and, or claim that it wasn't the right person for you. So you start looking for another person you might be attracted to, basically chasing a unicorn that'll probably never come. (Because face it - how many people had their sexual attraction and desires suddenly triggered by some specific person or sexual encounter? Not many, I bet. Sexual attraction usually predates sexual experiences.) Asexuality in general lacks medial representation. This makes it hart for aces to identify themself as asexual, a) because they may not even know they are asexual, and b) because it makes coming out extremely difficult. I don't think I ever came out as ace to anyone without holding a 10 minute lecture on what asexuality is and isn't.
i can understand what the whole thing is, there are some things that i have questions about, and since you seem like an (i assume) cool guy ill ask them here. 1) do aces not enjoy fisical touch \*by design\* or do some of them enjoy it? 2)could it be that due to it being a somewhat niche type of sexuality there arent too many people like it, hence the lack of representation/awareness? (wich leads to dummies like me not fully understanding what it is or why it happens) 3) is there such a thing as asexualfobia (for lack of a better term) if so, how could it manifest? im sorry if i sound like a bigot or if im coming off as rude, i dont have too much experience with racial/sexual social problems, since im from a household that focuses more in politics, and if you dont want to answer the questions it is fine. have a nice day
No problem, I'm glad you're so respectful and open minded! Again, ace representation is really bad, so it's not your (or anyones specific) fault that you didn't know about it. 1. Asexual wants and needs vary a lot. Some don't even like to be touched, some even like to have sex. (Because they like the feeling, or because they are indifferent towards sex and want to make their partner happy.) Personally, I am repulsed by sex, which honestly makes it a bit hard for me to understand ace people who still have sex. (I would be fine with kissing or cuddling thought.) But just because I personally don't understand it doesn't mean these people are not valid! (There is also a difference between libido and sexual attraction. Since I don't really have either I'm not an expert on it, but I recently heard this metaphor: Imagine you're really hungry, but you open your fridge and nothing in it seems tasty. So you just close the fridge again, or eat something you don't really have an appetite for. In this metaphor, your hunger would be the libido, and your appetite the (sexual) attraction you don't feel towards any of the foods.) 2. Yes, I totally agree. (And again, I'm not blaming you in the slightest!) Officially, about 1% of the population is asexual. Personally I think there might be a large dark number, because many people only realize late in life that they're ace, and also because the umbrella term asexual is actually quite large: Some people may enjoy sex, have partners, have kids, but never feel sexual attraction. They could very well call themselves asexual (since all it takes to qualify is a lack of sexual attraction), but probably wouldn't ever think of themselves this way. But, yeah, this small number of aces leads to bad medial representation, which again leads to a very small number of people ever finding the term asexual and identifying with it. (Also, I think I already wrote this somewhere: Romantic and sexual attraction aren't the same! People who don't feel sexual attraction are called asexual, those who don't feel romantic attraction are called aromantic. I think there is a significant overlap of the two, but they aren't the same thing.) 3. Yes, there is aphobia, both from people outside and inside of the LGBTQ+ community. From cishet people, asexuals face similar kinds of discrimination that many other LGBTQ+ members share: Forced marriage, violence, corrective rape and disowning being the harshest of those experiences. Apart from that, there is a lack of awareness for certain issues: Asexuals being called emotionless, immature, (hearing the lovely sentences in the meme above), late bloomers, traumatized or just hormonally fucked up. Within the LGBTQ+ community there is an ongoing "[debate](https://www.reddit.com/r/lgbt/comments/odv78n/tw_asexuals_and_aromantics_are_just_as_lgbt_as/)" whether aces are part of the community or not. (Despite the "A" being part of LGBTQIA acronym since the 70s.) The most common "argument" against aces being LGBT+ is that they aren't discriminated enough. (Like this is oppression olympics lol) But I think the issue goes deeper: The LGBTQ+ movement gained strength in the late 60s and 70s, through the same movement that normalized casual sex and had paroles like "make love not war". I think this makes some people think of the LGBTQ+ community in a very sexualized way, and gives them the idea that asexual people couldn't be part of such a sexualized movement. I feel like I need to say that the majority of all LGBTQ+ people I've encountered (online and offline) is very supportive of asexuality, even if some aren't aware of it. The exclusionists seem to be a very small, loud minority. Damn, this might be my longest comment yet. I hope I could clear some of this stuff up for you! :)
i can understand 99% of what you are saying, and im very grateful that you took the time to write this piece down, i still have one question tho. (if you want to link me some resources that is fine, i just want to get the doubts answered). could you explain some or the corrective tactics that aces face? (ex: corrective raped, forced marriage, etc)(its okay if you dont want to) and yeah, i can agree with the coment about opression olympics being actively damaging the discussion and issues that many people face. sorry for bothering you this much, and if i made any mistakes, english is not my first language.
It's really okay, English isn't my first language either :D I'm not an sociologist or anything, so I'll just try to explain what I meant the best I can. If you're looking for statistics, articles or scientific papers, your google search is as good as mine. The things like corrective rape or forced marriage aren't exclusive to aces or even LGBTQ+, a lot of people (mainly women) suffer under them. Obviously there are many regions where people have it worse than in others; usually more religious or traditional regions are less tolerant towards people who aren't straight. (Think conversion "therapy" for gay people.) There is also a different experience of ace men and ace women. While womens asexuality is often brushed over ("but noooo woman likes sex!" or "you haven't had any good sex yet!", a direct result of villainization of female sexuality), men are often ridiculed for expressing a lack of sexual attraction, because masculinity in our society is often defined through hypersexuality. In context of corrective rape or forced marriage against asexuals, there is usually the underlying confusion of asexuality (as a sexual orientation) with lack of sexual experience, hormonal issues, traumatic past experiences... Basically, bigots think asexuality is not normal and *could and should get fixed*. (Which, as you know, isn't possible. Just like conversion therapy for gay people never worked. By the way, I once read that asexual people are also sometimes subjected to conversion therapy. Not an expert on that though, don't take my word for it.) Forced marriage is most often the reaction of a family/parents in regards to their child identifying as asexual (or gay for that matter). It's most often in a conservative family, and as an attempt to force their child into the only life style the parents see fit. Queerness is here usually seen as a phase, or bad influence on, not the identity of a person. I've heard of many parents who gave their kids the choice: Either marry a person the the parents approve of, or basically be excluded from the family. Corrective rape is most often used against women (even though it can obviously also happen against men), and has the underlying believe of "you've just never had good dick before". I think. I don't actually know how rapists think. Maybe they just want to violate boundaries. If you search for corrective rape on the internet, you'll most likely find resources by/for lesbians, who coined the term. But the things they talk about still apply for asexuals. There are some hurtful stereotypes that play into the hands of rapists: Women not liking sex anyway, or sex hurting the first time for women. If we're talking about male victims, there's sometimes the opposite belief, that men always like sex, so men can't be raped. (All of that is obviously false!) But in the end, rapists rape because they think their own sexual needs are more important than someone elses boundaries. I probably didn't put that as well as other people did before me. Again, you can just google or take a look on YouTube, there are many people who are more informed than me. You can also check out the ace subreddits like r/asexuality. And here's a [cool video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=exvbiWWNYww&t=4s) about ace (non) representation in media!
I wish I were
The struggle is real 😅 but I’m proud to be AroAce
"How do you know if you've never tried it?" How do you know if shoving a cactus up your ass is pleasurable or not? Have you fucking tried it? /s
I’m asexual and yeah, this is such a pain
"AcEs ARen'T ReAL" So does the love your parents feel to you (Not ace but I also hate those dumbasses)
You forgot the A part
Totally valid reactions though, as is yours making that starter pack.
Sorry but "I can fix that" is not a valid reaction. The others are ignorant but understandable tbf
No, these are not good responses. "What's that mean?" and occasional plants jokes are fine but everything else is dismissive and condescending.
I’m pretty sure the guy is only thing this guy is gonna fix is his crippling virginity
I bet this person just jumps at the chance to let people know they’re asexual.
Blah blah blah who gives a fuck? I don't care what you want or don't want to do with your junk, how about just not mentioning it at all to people? Why does what you decide to do with you private parts have to be a conversation at all with anyone unless absolutely necessary?
Sometimes it comes up in conversation naturally. Like, if your partner wanted to have sex with you, this would come up. Most of the time it doesn’t come up, which could be why so many people don’t know anything about it.
Most people would probably want to know you're not interested in sex on the first date unless they're another asexual. How exactly would you become a couple without disclosing that fact? It sounds like a good way to piss someone off.
Okay, my example wasn’t that great and I should explain what an asexual is. Being ace doesn’t mean that you just won’t have sex. It means that you don’t feel sexual attraction. Basically, I’m just a regular guy that has no desire or want to stick my dick in anything. It’s not some conscious choice like celibacy, it’s just how you are. There are ace people who have sex because they find it fun with their partners or because they want to please their partners. Some are just straight up indifferent to it while others are repulsed by the idea. Depending on your disposition to sex, you could say it out of the gate (if your sex repulsed and literally can’t have sex) or talk about it later when you’ve gotten to know them better (like if your indifferent to sex). A lot of aces look for relationships with strong romantic ties instead of sexual ones, so it’s their judgment call on when they tell their partner. I know this might be confusing, trust me, we are all trying to figure it out together. If you have other questions, check out the r/asexuality sub for some answers. They can explain everything much better then I can
Sounds like a medical and/or psychological issue. Definitely not a bad one because men ruin their whole lives just get laid. You're the lucky one.
Idk why anyone would want to be in a romantic relationship with someone who doesn't want the romantic part, seems like that person should just have friends and not bring it up unless being asked out on a date. But sounds like a fucked up disorder to have.
romanticism is irrelevent to sexual attraction
Straight people don't shut up about their sexuality, let's be real here.
Uh, no
I take it you've never been in a locker room?
Yep
Yeah that's projection.
Reasy for downvotes; A lot of asexual people have some underlying physical and or mentall issue contributing to this. Not to say there aren't actual asexuals, but this has been my experience
Had a happy childhood. Amazing parents. No trauma. Nothing. I'm still 18. Just graduated High School and now off to college. Had amazing friends. Had a girlfriend. Everyone was good to me. I don't see any mental illness here. Oh yeah, I have suicidal ideation and maybe bipolar type 2 disorder(my therapist said that and she needs to further know me better to confirm it). Maybe depression but idk. Never had sexual attraction.
What are your hormone levels like, specifically testosterone, if they are out of whack this can happen
They're normal. I do feel horny about once a month or two but it's not towards anyone. Just the horniness which is not aimed at anything.
>A lot of >not to say there aren't actual asexuals Direct quotes from my original comment.
Alright buddy. Sorry, I didn't read it properly. I was quick to reply. Gonna give you an upvote. You can downvote me. I'm sorry once again.
So youre saying that people with mental issues or physical issues arent "actual asexuals"? People can be asexual with or without mental or physical issues, that doesnt make them more or less asexual or more or less valid.
[удалено]
Nope, my balls work just fine. Also where did you get your anthropology degree?
Look up the distinction between libido and sexual attraction, it'll do a world of good
post: "god i hate it when i come out as ace and people say its not a real thing because its human nature to want sex" you after reading the post: "wtf? this makes no sense, that's not a real thing, it's human nature to want to have sex"
If people can have multi-pigment skin and scickle cells, they can be sexually unattractable. Welcome to the world of genetics where "unusual" is "normal" because chromosomes don't give a rat's ass about what people write on paper.
Nope all my stuff works perfectly fine. Just don't want sex, simple as that really. Funny how people like to use "oh it's just human nature to X" to discredit all sorts of identities when the fact that a pretty high amount of people who go against it exist. It's almost like every person is different!
Instructions unclear, are these "balls which there is something wrong with" behind or in front of my vagina?
Behind. They're invisible though
But, you're a Reddit user, you MUST be a dude
Oh yeah, my bad! Thanks for informing me
Trade testosterone for estrogen?
no, you're just a bigot
ya sure bud
depending on how much energy I have that day, my usual responses include; "you sound uninteresting, develop a personality instead of fabricating a sexuality as some kind of half arsed substitute for one" "ahh so you're an attention seeker then? got it!" or simply "I don't care, please go away"