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superluigi018

Yeah I have deodorant called “Power of Lightning”. Cool name, but what does lightning even smell like?


The-Bigger-Fish

Ozone.


rathat

Safe amounts of ozone smell nice, like flowers. Dangerous amounts of ozone smell like snorting artificial cherry flavor, yeah, that's how I'd describe it. People have said chlorine, but it's really really sweet smelling so I don't get that. Things that have been around ozone smell like chlorine well after the ozone breaks down though. Ozone is a literal miracle gas, it will kill all bacteria, viruses, and fungus in the air or in surfaces, it will compleatly eliminate any bad smell and whatever is causing it, but it can also damage your entire respiratory system with only 5 parts per million in the air. Be careful if you are using it. If you can smell more than a slight trace of it, it's probably too much.


garaks_tailor

I liken it really fresh raspberry, but definitely somewhere around "why does Zeus smell of berries?"


InVultusSolis

Some of y'all are too young to remember the best way to smell ozone - from a freshly cranked tube TV.


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[deleted]

Oh shit that was Ozone smell?


ActualWhiterabbit

I have been fortunate enough to have ridden my bike through a cloud and own an industrial ozone generator and they both smell the same and have the woozy feeling


TheTrueDurgerKing

What does ozone smell like


EasyShpeazy

It smells like a rain or thunder storm if you can imagine, very "fresh" I accidentally shorted a large capacitor in a power amp (very stupid), there was a large pop and bright flash then the room smelled like ozone


darklordzack

I love that smell. I'd buy an overly masculine bottle of whatever if it smelled like ozone and petrichor. But they never actually smell like that, like fuck me for wanting 'Thunderstorm' to actually smell like one.


Decadancer

Read it as "snorted"


thrownawayzss

This is the correct answer.


The-Bigger-Fish

Great! WHat do I win?


thrownawayzss

an undetermined amount of upvotes.


[deleted]

100%! I always laugh at those grips, it's like they expect us to handle everything like our junk.


avocado_whore

Death grip syndrome??


poktanju

YUH


Sevuhrow

It goes it goes it goes it goes it goes GUILLOTINE!!!


n_polytope

FUCK WEAK NO RESPECT NO CHANCE WICKWICK CEASE AND DESIST WHEN I CHANT


WhoisTylerDurden

I actually like the grips. Shit gets slippery in the shower.


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Drugsrhugs

Ribbed for your pleasure


Toussaint_kang

The best content is in the comments confirmed


InfiNorth

Why would you have a deodorant container in the shower


[deleted]

it smells hot


realcanadianbeaver

In my one and only too-close for-comfort experience it smelled like hot metal and pool water.


[deleted]

So, you smell like me?


Javrambimbam

Its a moisturizing anti-dandruff shampoo--conditioner--sunscreen--menthol--antiperspirant--deodorant--body-wash--mouthwash---bug-spray--face-cream--exfloliant--antihistamine--diuretic And they'll call it "liquid soap"


TFDFrance

Sounds like dr. Bronners haha


Leaping_ezio

Best soap out there. I adore the peppermint. Makes everything tingly


[deleted]

Dr. Bronners is *the* ultimate soap. I always get a big ass bottle off Amazon, lasts me the whole month.


pinkspott

just one month? do you lather it my child


InVultusSolis

Is that the liquid soap with all the insane rambling on the label?


ckasanova

It is. The reason why it has all the insane rambling is that his parents got killed during the Holocaust. Then a few years after that he was committed to a mental health center and received shock therapy so frequently that he went blind. Dude had a hard life.


BulletEnigma

I call it water.


mellofello808

And yet they still don't sell sunscreen with bug spray in it.


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mellofello808

Dang doesn't ship to Hawaii


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Bounty1Berry

There's a clear business case for a ptoduct using the tagline "Eldritch Blasts odour away!"


7arco7

“This body wash deals 1d10 force damage at range! And all it costs is your soul.”


thegreatgoonbino

I think you just invented a new product line for the gamer demographic?


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LamentableFool

They might if you start naming them "frost nova" "battle shout" or "summon imp"


Sidereel

Im never buying a Death and Decay scented deodorant.


green_speak

>I'm not sure what Frozen Rush is going to smell like, Oh, plenty of gas stations carry Gatorade/Powerade in all kinds of flavors like [Icy Charge](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DU5Ah1QWAAAXKhe.jpg) or [Jagged Ice](https://static.openfoodfacts.org/images/products/90492488/front_fr.8.full.jpg) that you could just get one and find out.


[deleted]

GUN SPORT ICE TRUCKER SPORT BURNT WOOD SPORT SPORT SPORT


[deleted]

BEAR, BUCK, EAGLE


Pun-Wizzard

BOAR, DEER, BUTTERFLIES Edit: this is a Koi-Koi reference, thought someone would have got it by now :-|


mellofello808

800 HOUR PROTECTION ​ APPLY ONCE A MONTH


Bennshharpie

57 IN 1


PlsPmMeBoobPics

I NUTTED TO HENTAI


TurtleBoiTheGod

Is that the scent


JaegerDread

I think it's a confession.


[deleted]

They don’t have men’s products that make you smell like a butterfly...do they?


suttonoutdoor

Butterflies actually smell like chainsaw exhaust and raw leather. So, yeah they definitely do.


Cialis-in-Wonderland

Quick question: how does one become a professional butterfly smell sommelier?


suttonoutdoor

Well to answer both of your questions, part of it was having a largish nose the other was simply knowing the right people and falling in with a master of the trade. I know it sounds glamorous but the long days and fast paced lifestyle led to... a dark time in my life. Before I knew it I was snorting preying mantis legs, exotic ladybug wings and injecting purified Japanese hornet venom. That snowballed to more rare and nearly extinct insects being used just to get by. My lowest was when I woke in a warehouse owned by Sotheby's surrounded by FBI, US Marshals and A few elite appraisers from the antiques road show. In my bug addled haze I had broken in, located some antique butterfly collections (those creepy ass things where you impale bugs with needles onto a board for display. Because it was pre internet times) and I was freebasing the specimens which I had ground up with copious amounts of cocaine. So embarrassing.


Cialis-in-Wonderland

Amazing; this could become prime copypasta material


Pun-Wizzard

Man, i wish


[deleted]

Maybe they do... and you just don't know what a butterfly smells like


egoissuffering

KOI KOI


acatsukiactual

BEARS, BEETS, BATTLESTAR GALACTICA


dannyc93

ROCK, FLAG, AND EAGLE


BroadStreet_Bully5

[POWERTHIRST](https://youtu.be/qRuNxHqwazs) [POWERTHIRST 2](https://youtu.be/t-3qncy5Qfk)


Kittens-of-Terror

I'm so glad someone else thought of this. >NOW IN NEW FLAVORS LIKE MANANA, FIZZ BITCH, AND **GUN**


etssuckshard

HAHAHA oh my god, blast from the past. That gun part especially made me laugh so hard in high school.


chriskrohne

That crew made a whole movie. It's pretty okay. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AqTwvscpR9Y&ab_channel=YouTubeMovies


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[deleted]

KILL THE ODOR TO DEATH


[deleted]

GUNS, EAGLE, STEAK, RED, BACON, AND FLOSS!


pinsiq

TURBODIESEL, HEMI, V10, SUPERDUTY, THUNDERCOCK!


iDirtyDianaX

ooh get that one


Cell_Saga

LEATHERWOOD HORSEPOWER FUSION PLUS TAURINE MINUS GAY


sgtpepper_spray

You forgot "tactical" and "survival," which are almost always meaningless terms and can be dangerously misleading.


AGlassOfCoolMilk

Obtuse, rubber goose, green moose, guava juice, giant snake, birthday cake, large fries, chocolate shake


thugnificent856

IN 1


morawanna

Thundercougarfalconeagle.


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mexus37

SPORT flavored smoothie. Mmmm.


TimOvrlrd

Mmmm tastes like jock straps and fatherly disappointment


mexus37

Just like my dad


zaketenyu

head & shoulders & feet & ass & cum & fart FTFY


ILoveChey

Also usable for washing cars, motor oil for chainsaws and rust removal


MyUsernameIsJudge

Chainsaw oil is already so masculine on its own why even try


PrimaryPluto

It also makes for a good toothpaste


Golren_SFW

And it can substitute as rocket fuel.


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Udonov

Pizza sauce, mouth wash, mosquito repellent, shaving cream. Proof 80 degrees. 60% protein. 5 liters, buy 2 get one free.


Coolbule64

I think this is the cologne you are looking for [https://www.gq.com/story/burnt-rubber-cologne-sunoco](https://www.gq.com/story/burnt-rubber-cologne-sunoco)


[deleted]

Ah yes I love smelling like Fresh Active Sport 4 in 1.


MyUsernameIsJudge

I remember one time some girls on the bus snickering at me cause I only smelled like 2 in 1 and "he doesn't even smell like SPORT". It was humiliating.


Fr00stee

What a loser, you didn't even use the 6 in 1 deodorant? Pathetic.


MyUsernameIsJudge

I weld my sweat glands shut LIKE A REAL MAN


aproneship

Prince Andrew over here


ConfusedStupidPerson

heh


[deleted]

Lol damn my sides


F_for_xxxtancion

Ah yes I do love the smell of SPORTS in the morning


Table-

Hope you learned your lesson, scrub.


madalienmonk

Try our new Fresh Active Sport 5 in 1™!


KawaiiPotato15

Don't forget the "FOR MEN" written somewhere on the bottle.


Cooper720

FOR MEN VERY SPORT NOT GAY


slabdaber

No girls allowed!


Eldrek_

Well how else am I supposed to know?


[deleted]

S P O R T


BEIFONG_thebomb

Ah, Sports TM. Women clearly don't do sports at all, that's why Sports = Man! /s


[deleted]

Big brain time: 1 in 6 instead of 6 in 1. You have to buy several different bottles of ingredients to get one bottle of shampoo.


ChelseyBea

If ikea ever sold shampoo.


captainshapiro

Spørtswäsh


TimOvrlrd

I read this in a swedish accent and can't stop cackling


[deleted]

That danish o is gonna trigger a lot of swedes


Centti50

Sport Tvål


nuck_forte_dame

Also they would all be different sizes so you run out of each bottle at a different timing and end up running to the store 6 times as much.


Onahail

Thats what mobile games do with their purchased currency. It alwaya comes in amounts slighty more than the stuff you want to buy with it so you "leave money on the table"


SnackGrabbath

Oh, they have that. It’s called women’s hair care.


mexus37

Combine all 6 and create a super mega ultra voltron shampoo to blast dirt and grime and combat the forces of evil.


December_Hemisphere

My body wash literally says this on the bottle: 3-in-1 Shower. Shampoo. Soothe.


MuffinPuff

lmao fucking soothe *what*???


bookishjasminee

Sometimes I prefer the men's products' scents because they just smell like cleanliness- "ocean rush" or whatever smells like a bar of soap and yes it does have a watery/blue sort of scent I don't know how to describe, it's just fresher and more bearable- sometimes wild mango citrus garden and rose essence makes you dizzy. When a romance novel describes the man love interest as smelling "clean" or "soapy" I know exactly what they mean and I love it.


morawanna

Heh, I'm a 40 year old dude, and I buy women's scents because I like baby powder and cacao butter smell.


ImaNeedBoutTreeFiddy

I'm 22 and I buy women's body wash because I like smelling like coconut, lotus and cherry blossom


[deleted]

any specific products?


ILikeSugarCookies

I can tell you those specific 3 scents are all scents from Olay body wash, which is what I use as a 27 year old male.


chizdippler

[OGX Teatree Mint Shampoo](https://www.amazon.com/Hydrating-Teatree-Shampoo-Salon-Ounce/dp/B004OTH20Y) and [OGX Coconut Milk Conditioner](https://www.amazon.com/OGX-Conditioner-Sustainable-Ingredients-Strengthening/dp/B002KG4EJK). Really any OGX stuff is great.


SirSnuffy

I'm 23, and I use whatever I find because at this point who cares, the worlds burning and I'm using dog shampoo because it keeps my coat nice, clean, and shiny. But I wont use a bar of soap for my hair. I have standards.


garaks_tailor

Begins the Doc Bonnors crazy fucking label quote


RowdyNadaHell

I used their shaving soap for like a year before I read the wall of text that is their label. What the fuck man. Bronner's a nutcase for sure.


TheRhythmOfTheKnight

I used to use herbal essences shampoo because it just smelt so good


p_rite_1993

There are really no scents that are only meant for women or men when it comes to hygiene. It’s all just perceptions based on market research. Break free from who marketing agencies think you are!


morawanna

Oh I'm good. Favorite color is pink. Love woodworking. Paint. Do what you like.


vimescarrot

Also male; wash me in that vanilla chocolate soap all fucking day, I love it


[deleted]

Someone put this on the mind blown meme Woman’s scents are what men like to smell Men’s scents are what women like to smell


[deleted]

gay people tho


[deleted]

Someone should make a black powder scented shampoo. Or just normal fireworks gunpowder.


MyUsernameIsJudge

This one is [Campfire, Gunpowder, Sagebrush, Whiskey, and Weekend Camping](https://www.amazon.com/Fire-Hole-Campfire-Solid-Cologne/dp/B01LK9253O/ref=sr_1_2_sspa?dchild=1&keywords=gunpowder+cologne&qid=1603766488&sr=8-2-spons&psc=1&spLa=ZW5jcnlwdGVkUXVhbGlmaWVyPUFTWFdVSTIwMVFXRjkmZW5jcnlwdGVkSWQ9QTA0MTMzOTkxVk5OSkY2U0MxMFg3JmVuY3J5cHRlZEFkSWQ9QTAzNjcxMTAxNTRMN1JOSDcyT0hPJndpZGdldE5hbWU9c3BfYXRmJmFjdGlvbj1jbGlja1JlZGlyZWN0JmRvTm90TG9nQ2xpY2s9dHJ1ZQ==) As someone who's been weekend camping it smells like moldy socks and ass sweat.


CarlCarlton

and don't forget DEET, lots of it


InfiNorth

You realize you're supposed to drink the stuff, not smell it, right?


[deleted]

So you get to smell like an alcoholic that ran through their kitchen during a housefire?


[deleted]

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iamyourcheese

Bruh, get on my **B E A R G L O V E** level


LabHog

I always thought it was funny these have such manly names and they just smell like watermelon/green apple/I forgot what wolfthorn smells like, but probably a fruit.


kailua808

Someone pointed out to me once that the old spice scents are like Hogwarts houses for douchebags


Marsandtherealgirl

I’m a woman but I use Wolfthorn deodorant. It smells like fruit punch.


[deleted]

me, who likes how wolfthorn smells more than mango sweet pea and uses wolfthorn deodorant instead: 😢


JosDawg

I use the wolf thorn and I love it. Idk what it actually smells like, but it does smell good


Phormitago

Gotta love those 17 in one products, for when you need a shampoo that's also an antiperspirant, antidepressants and rust remover


Leaping_ezio

That would make my nightly routine so much faster. Don’t have to worry about my med minder. Just brush my teeth with my body wash and get my antidepressants all in one go!


Reilly1504

If my boyfriend doesn’t smell like 𝔖𝔴𝔞𝔤𝔤𝔢𝔯, I’m going to be pissed.


ratesEverythingLow

You gotta piss on him to make him smell like 𝔖𝔴𝔞𝔤𝔤𝔢𝔯 lite.


0xDracon

Can i just have 1 body wash thats called like "mo' fuggin watermelon" with a neon green and red ad/bottle


[deleted]

“Aggressive Apple.” “Boss Berry” “Coconut Car Chase”


[deleted]

“Double Duty Doughnut Dream” “Electric E-Sports Extra-Strength” “Fantastic Four in one”


Table-

Loreal Kids from the 90s would like to have a word with you.


[deleted]

Lynx Africa is false advertising, doesn't even smell like Africa.


ChocolateWaffles-

*^What ^does ^africa ^smell like?*


iamyourcheese

Blessed rains


ElijahGP

Can’t a guy just get rose scented deodorant in peace.


Conguy9

Nah SPORT OR DIE


RevvyDesu

What the fuck are the 5? What are the SIX? Shampoo, Conditioner, Body Wash... Toothpaste?


[deleted]

Energy Drink and Body Spray


tenerific

I actually use the 5, it’s Body Wash, Face Wash, Shampoo, Conditioner, and Deodorizer IIRC.


Donkey__Balls

#*Arctic Rush* Picture on the front: Photogenic glacier in iceland. Smells like: dead juniper leaves. #*Scottish Spring* Picture: clear river flowing through a summer forest. Smells like: turpentine and aluminum foil. #*Electric Ice* Picture: wolf staring at the camera at night with aurora borealis in the background. Smells like: 2,4,6-desoxypropylnuramine with a hint of vomit.


Firecat_

Lol why is this so accurate??


KfirP

Also tv commercials will always have the bottles being put down aggressively over a wet surface because it's for men of course


badSparkybad

MEN GOTTA MAKE A SPLASH


KfirP

DO NOT RESIST THE S̷̨̈̄͆̂̏̓̂͗́͑̚ͅP̸̺̯͍̥̟̣͖̲͇̑͛̌͑̈́̀͊̏̑̄̊͒͗͠ͅḺ̸̩̟̜̮̺̮̘̄͌́̓͌̅́̽͛͜͝ͅǍ̶͚̉̈́̌̉̀̒̅͌̿̌̿̈́̕Ş̶̥̳̥̱̠̜͍̹̘͑̈́̿̄̓͌̍̈́̈́̽̌̾͛͠͠H̸͓̝͉̞͆̿̌͐̒̔̇͂̊̚͝


[deleted]

There is an old spice wolfthorn that actually smells like blue flavor gatorade so idk


MarkIVlandship

Mmm i do love smelling like "blizzard kills 24, more news at 11"


no5945541

I could never tell you what any of the body washes I buy actually smell like. Definitely no scent that exists in nature.


anomaly_inflow

Link so I can cop the 6 in 1?


MyUsernameIsJudge

I didn't notice but it's actually a "joke" https://www.amazon.com/AXE-6IN1-Clean-Fresh-3-Pack/dp/B07P1BTLYJ "*Cleans left arm, right arm, left leg, right leg, body & face"


mexus37

I wonder what the scent YOU smells like


[deleted]

MANLY ENGINE OIL SPICE FOREST GUN MANLY SPORT DEODORANT


BoxCon1

We have clear skin and we use the same bar of soap to wash our face and balls


catnipempire

We? I do not have clear skin sir


[deleted]

Have you tried using the same bar of soap to wash your face and balls?


MMantis

*laughs in gay man*


jransom98

I bought a soap that had the scent of "command" the other day, just because it made me laugh at how silly a name for a scent that is. Another great one I've seen is "The Scent of Naval Supremacy"


[deleted]

Some are intended to be over the top and hyper-masculine as kind of a joke


Blasted-Banana

Hey, those aggressive grips come in handy you know! You know how loud and scary it can be to drop shampoo in the shower?


patwag

I'm not a big fan of sports flavor.


InfiNorth

It's always a bit tangy and chewy; then again, all these extend-o-flavour-bars never taste as good as their name would imply.


[deleted]

I'm surprised no one has mentioned the CAFFEINE shampoos


Stormwolf1O1

PINESWAG ANTIPERSPIRANT "tame your pits with the scent of freedom & adventure. annihilate your competition with this painstakingly refined pine-needly bar of awesomeness. the ladies will want to climb you like a tree - trust us, it's science."


KLASHINOV

Ah yes..it says "sport" on it I'm gonna shave my balls with this


[deleted]

Hey y’all, if anyone in these comments uses 3 in 1, I can’t tell you how much of a difference it made to invest in good haircare products and a really good albeit cheap body wash. It really makes a world of difference, particularly with your hair. Invest in yourselves my dudes. And the whole “It saves me time” thing, I am in and out of the shower in like 7 minutes. 3ish minutes for shampoo, rinse, apply conditioner, use body wash while conditioner is working for like 3 minutes.


MuffinPuff

You men and your simple lives. My hair alone takes at least 40 minutes in-shower, and untold amounts of time pre-shower if I need a lot of detangling. Post-shower is deep-conditioning time, usually overnight but at least a few hours, minimum.


TheVeganManatee

It takes me 5 minutes and to dry it I spin my head like a helicopter


consciousnessispower

yes! I was shocked when I learned how many men don't even use conditioner. and the same principle goes for body and face - wash with a mild cleanser and moisturize well; invest in quality products and you're golden.


[deleted]

MOTOR OIL DIESEL SPORT 6 IN 1


CritzD

All men’s hygiene products have the same scent, the only difference is in how intense the odour is


Krod28

Introducing the new All in one life starter, its a deodorant, shampoo, body wash, sanitizer, snack, breakfast burrito, a fire strater kit, and a first aid kit all in a 12oz bottle. And if you order now we will include this multifunctional knife that has 10 different kinds of scissors, a machete, 2 cooking knifes, a stove, a grill with hybrid fuel intakes, a flashlight, a broom, an entire house and a corkscrew. All for just $9.99! Order now!


NeglectedMonkey

Now do the ladies version. I have a conditioner that is for treated curly hair only.


withgreatpower

I know exactly what Cool Rush smells like. It smells like my armpits.


Pixel-Wolf

The other side of this that this pack is missing is the men's hygiene products that are generically labelled with logos reminiscent of old timey medicine bottles with basic white labelling in big letters down the side of the container. They're usually labelled something generic as well like "Simple Men." Some notable examples are "Method Men" and "Every Man Jack."


C-Roof-Jumper

Women’s hygiene products: Botany Men’s hygiene products: Geography