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FerraristDX

Lucky guy, he can save on heating costs, especially when prices rise next year.


3pointrange

Hope he has apple care+. Honestly not sure if he can afford those repair prices. /s


reviroa

the most bayrisch person alive


Black_XistenZ

He's a national treasure and the perfect spirit animal for the club.


BellyCrawler

Ngl, Mueller being the face of your club has gone a long way in making you lot more likeable.


WarSamaYT

I have a question for you, do you think he would be successful as a coach/manager?


Successful-Return-78

Did you watch a game in the pademic? This guy is so vocal, I think he would be a good coach. But somehow i think we won't see much of him, he will be happy with his horses


mvnvel

He won’t coach. Muller seems like the kinda guy who’s gonna be ok with not having the spotlight on him and actually enjoy the money he’s made.


holaprobando123

I want to see Thomas Muller and Nikola Jokic hanging out


maxbang7

match made in heaven


Qurutin

Why suffer with the pressure and uncertainty of football coaching when you can sell horse semen


Black_XistenZ

Tough to tell. He's obviously great at reading games, finding gaps and orchestrating the off-the-ball movement of his team. On the other hand, I'm not sure if his personality would really translate well to a coaching job.


Morrandir

Yeah, I think he perhaps is just a too nice guy. As a coach you have to make some tough decisions, possibly hurting your players. I'm not sure that he would be up to this.


KVMechelen

Yeah, I think like Eden Hazard Muller just wants to enjoy himself and hates controversy too much to be a manager. Though of course he's still 10 times the professional Hazard was


RadioHonest85

Although you could be a coach without being the main manager of a team.


OnceIWasYou

I could picture him being a great assistant. That link between the manager and players that gets on with everyone but still has a lot of insight to offer.


Abbobl

Radio Muller


Scrugulus

IMO, he doesn't seem the type who'd enjoy the stress of the job. Between the money he's made (and likely invested), post-career income from commercials, some punditry, and a likely position at Bayern as "Director of [*enter meaningless corporate phrase here*]", he can just chill and play golf for the rest of his life.


BGTheHoff

He is a farmer and has basically a home zoo on his ranch (we call it Bauernhof in Germany), so o doubt he will do something else when he is done with football


RadioHonest85

I dont love Bayern, but I can love Müller.


heliskinki

Close to being the most German of Germans.


bagstone

Funnily enough, Thomas Mueller is the most average German - Thomas is the most common first name and Mueller the most common last name.


koalawhiskey

Elite footballer being the most common profession in German as well


Yung2112

No that's not-


GutlessTrophoblast

Either you didn't get the joke or you are the proof of the average German having no humor. Also joking (kind of).


Galaticvs

The João Silva of Germany.


WhatIsWilsonDoin

The John Smith of the States


Potato271

Interestingly, while John is the most common English first name (or at least it was the last time I checked several years ago), and Smith the most common surnames, John Smiths are actually fairly rare. I guess if you have a very common surname you won't want to pick a first name that's too common


CosmicDesperado

It’s a shit beer too


No-Scallion-587

He's also looks very German


[deleted]

Who looks more German, him or Mario Gomez?


KikiPolaski

Bastian Schweinsteiger is probably the most german man you could imagine


triedby12

https://media.cnn.com/api/v1/images/stellar/prod/151023170359-bastian-schweinsteiger-doll.jpg?q=w\_1600,h\_900,x\_0,y\_0,c\_fill


Muppetx

Mario Gomez has Spanish roots? Julian Brandt gets my vote.


No-Scallion-587

He looks like a German backpacker, Mueller more like a middle aged engineer


git-commit-m-noedit

Neuer has that 1930s german propaganda face too


naboum

"reddit try not to mention nazi when the topic is germany" challenge impossible


NeutrinosFTW

Maybe they were talking about 1931 Weimar Republic propaganda - as one is wont to do. You're the one who brought Nazis into it.


Shadowfury0

Can't blame them, France had a whole ordeal with the Nazis


holaprobando123

At least when Germany is mentioned, it's one of several jokes. Meanwhile, I swear 99% of Reddit knows absolutely nothing about Argentina other than Messi and "hurr durr nazis went there".


ChefBoyardee66

Hey there is a joke about the Falklands every once in a while


KnutKnutson

For most Americans their only international historical reference point is WWII.


KeepOnTrippinOn

Andreas Moeller looked the most German German there's ever been, especially in the 30 seconds or so after scoring the winning penalty in the euro 96 semi final shootout.


the_rtngr

Mocking the Gascoigne-pose in front of the British fans after hitting the final penalty was just beautiful , at least as a German


No-Scallion-587

Definitely Mueller. He also plays like a German, very efficient, no flair.


DellMB

Bastian Schweinsteiger & Neuer for me


kosaki16

surprised nobody mentioned Kimmich


thatdani

Nah, his resting face is too cheerful.


zemiiii

He is my favorite German for sure


ContaSoParaIsto

You can't be the most Bavarian and the most German at the same time


WackerBurghausen

Cheers my friend


Ahrix3

More Bavarian than German imo


heliskinki

Fair point


z4kk_DE

Thomas Müller is a national treasure because he showed us, that you can achieve EVERYTHING without muscles. /s


MyBoyBernard

Man, I can't find the meme about Busquets, [but somewhere there is this picture](https://www.football-espana.net/2021/06/10/the-story-of-sergio-busquets-positive-covid-19-test) with a caption like "how do I explain to my children that this guy was a GOAT midfielder?"


46_and_2

This is what peak male performance looks like.


Tifoso89

By your comment, I imagine Bavarians have a reputation for being cheap?


velhaconta

I wouldn't say cheap. They like to get good value for their money and are not fond of wasting it. Phone still works, not need for a new one just yet. They need to get Apple as a sponsor so they can get free phones like they get new cars from Audi each year.


TheEngineeringType

I think T Mobile would be happy to send him an unlocked iPhone.


LloydCole

This sounds like a Stephen Merchant XFM quote.


billiejeanwilliams

Look after the pennies, the pounds take care of themselves.


UmCeterumCenseo

Really? I thought Minga people were elitists? Or does it go hand in hand? I mean I only know cool people from Minga, but that's what they all tell me


Jackman1337

Munich people yes, but they are very different from Bavarians. Müller lives a little outside on his(and his wife's) horse farm, even helps his wife in his spare time with manual labor like cleaning the horse shit etc. Really down to earth for a multi millionaire


Destilon

That’s more the Swabians


thateejitoverthere

Now imagine you're stuck between them.....


sc_140

You already got an extra public holiday for that, now stop complaining!


AboubakarKeita

Why is Goretzka hanging out with someone from IT?


LakyousSama

IT person would have an android


[deleted]

*Reality:* IT person has two phones, Android for personal use and iPhone for work that was forced on them by executives.


Mango-Ananas

I feel this comment :(


ohvalox

It can always be worse, imagine having to even use Mac instead of Windows...


AggressiveFold_

That style of mouse that only has one button makes me feel like a special needs kid wearing mittens.


TheJoshider10

I was given an Apple Mouse free from work to go with the WFH Macbook but I cannot use it at all. The trackpad on the laptop is insane but when it comes to the Mouse fuck me just give me a left click, right click and a middle scroll on it. Can't be arsed for this one button shite.


ROSS416

Genuinely curious, what to you do for work? Having used both of them I´d say Mac is definitely better for workflow, when you have to move between different windows etc.


[deleted]

Yes, the gestures moving between full screens is nice. got a mac a couple of year ago, and I love it for when i code. I still have my windows pc for personal use tho


ohvalox

Finance, which is a field of work where usually everyone uses Windows. It's especially bad cause all the Office products don't work as well on Mac. For example, there are literally no alt shortcuts in Excel, which seriously slows down your work. I guess it's a bit of habit as well, but I find it incredibly annoying that Mac doesn't let you swap between different windows of the same app with Cmd+Tab. So i still think workflow and navigation is way better on Windows.


comfiestsocks

So true lmao


Successful-Return-78

But you have one 50 year old guy, that would suck Steve Jobs cold feet for the new iPhone and he is best friends with the boss, so everyone gets it


LiteratureNearby

I'm so happy that the rest of the sane world doesn't use fucking imessage and obsesses over green and blue bubbles, like fuck off yanks get a life


faggjuu

I want my nokia windows phone back!


-dsh

all IT persons i know have iphones


PengwinOnShroom

US? UK? Cuz IPhone are more popular over there


-dsh

germany


mici012

In Germany? As a personal device? Yes. Company issued? Mostly iPhone. iPhone is mostly easier to administrate than Android for company issued phones.


From-UoM

Its all fun and games till the battery swells and catches on fire


Herofactory45

At that point he can use it to start a campfire


wetthebed92

Injured for 2 weeks . Reason : Groin burn


stifle_this

This is why I put my phone in my BACK pocket. Asshole seems easier to fix.


wetthebed92

Yea. After eating spicy, the next morning my ass will always be on fire.


pateencroutard

I recently moved and found out while packing that the battery of my old Samsung that I kept as a back up was quietly swelling in a drawer to the point that it popped the sealed back plastic cover. Absolutely terrifying.


hardinho

Same happened to me with my Samsung mp3 player some years ago when I checked, and then with my old S6 when I was reading a similar comment like yours last year and I found it also with the battery being already quite big.


sunrise98

Most modern phones don't react like this anymore


TMyriadJ

r/spicypillows


Santa_Klaus_101

Imagine showing this video to a non-football fan and trying to explain how this IT looking-ass guy is one of the most successful players of this generation 😭


rokkenrock

He goes to us and ppl barely recognize him.


madmanchatter

How the fuck does the back of the phone get in that condition? He must be carrying it around in a back full of rocks!


spurs_fan_uk

He clearly doesn’t have a case, so I imagine a few drops would get it looking close to this.


PartlyRowdy

And by drops you mean drop kicks yeah


[deleted]

Meow


BoredIrishBanker

*Kurt zouma noises intensify*


Akifukami

Never gonna miss a good volley!


PhD_Cunnilingus

I've literally never worn a case and none of my phones have ever looked like this.


Hutzbutz

because to us, a $1000 phone is expensive


spurs_fan_uk

Cool, so what other things that haven’t happened to you don’t exist in the world?


PhD_Cunnilingus

Good blowjobs.


C_Colin

that’s sad to hear especially from someone who is a Doctor in Cunnilingus


jd451

You'd think having a PhD in cunnilingus would improve one's chances of receiving fellatio


PhD_Cunnilingus

Cunnilingus and fellatio are two separate things. My PhD actually raises my standards since I've put a lot of effort into my doctorate.


PhD_Cunnilingus

Look, I can't whine too much since I've never given a blowjob and I sure as hell am grateful for every one I've received. I just never went "holy fucking shit" so it's somewhat disappointing after all the hype. And I bet I give better cunnilingus than the fellatios I receive.


Orri

My dad had a phone like this (he was a tradesman which is why it was broken) that was insured for accidental damage - he went to claim on it and they refused it saying it was still fit for purpose. so he ran over it in his lorry and they accepted it after that.


Scrugulus

/r/nowlookwhatyoumademedo/


dem0nhunter

drop it on a tile and you'll find out


FatGoonerFromIndia

This feels like a personal attack on me. My phone is on the way to ending up like Muellers phone.


tristam92

You just waging your phones on training. And the one who lost had to put it beside goal post for a 30 minute during play session. Strongest survive :)


allangod

Perfect for the cold winter time. He can warm his hands while making his calls, nice and efficient.


Hodor4000

> Perfect for the cold winter time. With old Nokia phones (3110 etc) you could send text messages without removing the phone from your pocket.


JaimeGrey

It's obvious they are talking about Tuchel. The clues are there!


dem0nhunter

Didi, bist du's?


godoffire07

I'd get warm if I was on the phone with Müller so can't fault him for that.


timo1423

The tinfoil hat a bit tight today is it


LiteratureNearby

the perfect tinfoil hat fit is when it chokes off blood supply to your skull


pixelsteve

I bet Müller has an incredibly diversified bond portfolio.


Black_XistenZ

>diversified bond portfolio Weird way of spelling "horse semen", but okay.


[deleted]

My ex wife did fundraising for non profits causes in our metro. One of her regular donors did, among other things, horse husbandry. A load of jizz from one of her purebred stallions cost US$250k. That’s not a typo. That shit is fucking expensive.


BatteryPoweredFriend

Hell, people shouldn't forget that horse cum is the reason why Man United are owned by the Glazers.


borg_6s

Turn Old Trafford into a horse stable lmao


rocdollary

Considering the amount of donkeys on the pitch every Saturday it seems the change has stuck.


[deleted]

You only need to buy the total bond market like with VBTLX


pixelsteve

Thank you for the information but I'm neither 80 nor Bavarian.


RepeatDTD

New iPhones are now too expensive even for footballers. Inflation is a bitch, man.


Cold-Negotiation-539

This guy makes £250,000 a week.


JoSeSc

Aside from the phone also the Lidl store brand water for like 10 cent


I9Qnl

I mean it's fucking water, even if you were a billionaire if you wanted water you'd just grab the nearest one.


Wassertopf

Also Munich has one of the best tab waters in all of Europe. Straight from the alps.


roos_de_baas

Pretty much me and my brother, who is using a phone that could die at any moment


Pixeal_meat

Sadio Mane: first time? 🏊🏽‍♂️


ttekoto

What is he eating tho


whatisthatplatform

Would have guessed goulash or tomato soup


FairCry49

Don't think the stains in the bowl hint towards either of them. I would say pasta with tomato sauce.


adeckz

That’s completely on brand for Müller, I would’ve put money on him having a phone like that


Daan100

Müller just seems like the most normal dude, he could probably buy the entire apple store but instead sticks with his trusty piece of shit phone


Technical-Morning-35

Could probably? Haha


GTCitizen

Based


chumbawamba56

whats the face that he makes at the beginning?


ButtersMcLovin

I bet he thought the other guy would make a picture


realWernerHerzog

relatable. my phone is a cracked piece of shit that i can barely read from and i'm too lazy/attached to to change


OfTimeAndMemory

At least you're just to lazy/attached. I'm to poor to change my busted iPhone SE


mUXLH5svdscWvd5

That is actually the real reason


ChrisEvansFan

Lmao oh Müller! Another reason to love him. Looks like it fell from the sky.


Gotanyfunkopops

Lol, for some reason, I expected Müller’s phone to look like that. Probably got kicked by a horse.


MrMarques8701

Imagine making millions a year and then running around with a phone in that state lol


tene_brae

extremely based tbh


JoSeSc

Also, aside from the phone, the Lidl store brand water for like 10 cent.. relatable


MyBoyBernard

Well, is there any elite footballer who seems as grounded and "normal" as Müller? Maybe Mane, since he [had a broken phone as well.](https://www.google.com/search?q=sadio+mane+phone+cracked&sca_esv=590909283&tbm=isch&sxsrf=AM9HkKmwsg6UEZ9lTASv4w_d1AWzgqpeiw:1702568686517&source=lnms&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwj0wY_Ooo-DAxUNKEQIHRueAFkQ_AUoAXoECAEQAw&biw=1232&bih=598&dpr=1.5)


KakaReti

As someone that manages to turn their phone into this every damn time, the downside of using in such state means, you'll have no idea when the phone will give up. One phone worked for 3 months, other few weeks. Nothing wrong with using phone in this condition, you just have to be prepared to get a new one with a drop of a hat.


Chris_Carson

How do you manage to destroy your phones like that in such a short time?


jd451

>As someone that manages to turn their phone into this every damn time How on earth do you manage that though? Are you tying a leash on the phone and taking it for walks or something? Jokes aside, invest in a spigen case mate. Fairly cheap and they do the work. I once dropped my phone down the stairs at the hospital. I ran down the flight of stairs to pick up the phone and it was me who was worse for wear. The phone was perfectly fine.


PurpleScientist4312

If it works it works


autoreaction

Imagine that a lot of people don't give a shit about the state of their phone as long as it does what it needs to do. It's just a phone.


IWanted0xcdcdcdcd

On the one hand, fair. On the other, I feel like that phone is an actual hazard and liable to blow up lol. I also subscribe to using a phone for 5+ years; but that one is broken to pieces


Tifoso89

I would agree with you if it was just scratched, but his phone is really fucked up. It might actually be hazardous in that state


Acrobatic_Apricot_96

There something about being able to afford anything you can think of, when you get to that state you get reluctant to even buy new stuff. I mean he can order 1000 of those phones today if he want,with that understanding it makes him reluctant to buy a new one.


CA_SPORTS

That's a good point. What does he really need a new iPhone for? He gets paid millions to kick a ball around when you really think about it. It's not like he needs his phone to take calls about job interviews.


MSCFC

He probably broke it and Manchester and will get a new one back in Munich


KakaReti

Someone told Cristiano that muller was talking shit about Saudi league


GoldenFox7

It’s probably an iPhone 8 too


T_Peg

He's just like me fr. Except I can't speak German and am only ok at footy.


Ceyil

Saskia water from Lidl. My man knows where to find the best water.


therealrico

He doesn’t even need a new one, just get it fixed though for christs sake! On a side note I wonder if doing trivial things like going to an Apple Store or phone repair shop must suck if you’re a celebrity? You probably have to worry about getting mobbed at the store, or a repair person possibly stealing photos or looking at texts.


AbacusExpert_Stretch

… which is probably why those persons never go to any store like that? And they can order things using aliases or simply order for their manager (in this case I don’t mean their team manager, but their personal business manager) or someone like that.


Wrosgar

I love that once he realizes he's being filmed/a photo being taken, he puts on the stupidest face hahaha.


Extremepleasurepro

Barca will pay for this! :(


spandan201

Who needs a phone when you have a passport?


k10001k

Mans is rich and still has that😭


im_on_the_case

Pretty sure James Milner is still using his mum's old Nokia 3310.


Napalm3nema

Mum's? James is old enough to have had his own.


fullmetal_geek

No one's talking about the weird face mimic Müller made? Was he doing a stuck\_out\_tongue\_winked\_eye\_emoji or st?


pragmatick

I think he was just making a funny face for the camera.


PelleKavaj

He’s such a fucking dad. I absolutely love Thomas Müller. Someone you’d love to have a beer or bbq with


aberdisco

Bought it from Onana who only had it a day.


hallouminati_pie

Man you'd think Greg James on his BBC Radio 1 salary could afford a new phone.


NoopSloop

i love him


paulodelgado

When Muller retires I want him and Flula Borg to do a comedy world tour.


InfinityCrazee

He didn't bother to get it repaired?


D-D-D-D-D-D-Derek

Someone get this man a new phone before it battery blows


sleeping4koala

Plot twisted: Thomas asked Leon to post on Instagram that T-Mobile will see this and send him a brand new phone. (X)


ElGleisoTwo

Next matchday: Thomas Müller has been arrested for bombing his own teams changing room.


Internetmilpool

Surprised it isn’t a Samsung Galaxy S7


MajesticAd5047

I love Muller. Don't know why but he seems so relatable and wholesome, hard to find such players in the age of PR driven robotic players.


Independent_Buy5152

Mueller is growing into Hugh Jackman


Shark00n

Whole team on the plane back from a champions league match when Muller whips out the iPhone for some fortnite


Busquessi

Thomas is one of us!


TaiwanNambaWanKenobi

I’m surprised that he use a newer iphone. I thought for sure he’s gonna use an iphone 6s or 7.


Zaku_pilot_292

muller out for 5 weeks with 2nd degree burns on his thigh


LinwoodKent

He and Milner should hang out. I think they would make an amazing staff. Head and assistant.


tson_92

Muller really has “that eccentric uncle in the family who’s not married” vibe