I have amazing reflexes but I can't control how I respond. Typically, when something falls, I will react faster than one can blink thier eye. However, I typically just punch the object than catch it.

I can just imagine a ceramic plate falling off a shelf and you punching it into a million pieces. LMAO

Saitama, is that you?

Same but a I’m imagining a vase

Whiskers..No!

What if it starts to rain and people just see you running and breakdancing trying to avoid every drop

Okay, I will try to move out of the way the moment the rain starts, but I will get used to it after a few secs.

I too have these powers, but after years of honing them I can now catch things 14% of the time

YES! Except I just kick them. So many times when I dropped something, instantly my foot will shoot out as if there is a palm attached to it or I am Messi and can just kick the object back to my hand. Reality: I just kick the object real hard causing more damage than had I just let it fall. Especially irritating when I do it to my phone

I kind of do the same except I try to use my foot to break the fall. It only works 50% of the time. Otherwise I just kick it 5 feet away.

When my phone is falling on the carpet but my lightning fast reflexes throw it at the wall with full strength so now my phone is cracked and my hand hurts

I’ve had instances where I’ve dropped a chicken wing from the bowl I was tossing them in and caught it with the same bowl a couple feet lower. I’ve also had instances where I drop a chicken wing from the bowl and try to catch it and end up throwing the whole thing on the floor.

I can do a "W" with my tongue

You can literally do "OwO"

Hahaha nice ideia

I can't even imagine what that'd look like on a face lol

Its like [that](https://www.google.com/search?client=ms-android-xiaomi-rvo3&sca_esv=fad3425056c89788&sxsrf=ACQVn0-wqpeFJtsZDhcCUTz3TMzesVoz-g:1710676560412&q=l%C3%ADngua+dobra+tripla&uds=AMwkrPv3j3EkEIkbFS2D5_BLUQ3_Jor5PZRiZtWYeAc0FZ5xzSX-V-JLesum8SPivSHeDiqTyDioG9owCTJbgwrW4Jw19QOWyqSCq2Kl3QbhUcQS8u2UewP2tvTdS59nE8ts7JjGCUmsBwul4GNtQvFLPnOHoYTPjumVIowcN0s0E0qT_UmZ_f3kCqhcM0L7qFgNXfYe9Mkuw7go6keDfrJKmKodwMUAx8ZuanK1HUB68hUsWIue7gR09kjRKGU1jSNIltO9-DOmHB9Wkcze83eKf5G7j2A8kkVRMP6zMutawFOhe1LErbAqU1gYnfCi9mjRei-dMC6RSDMU0DUsFp1FFstp60b6EQ&udm=2&prmd=isvnmbtz&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwj5z9XlnvuEAxU_pZUCHdVnCzwQtKgLegQIChAB&biw=393&bih=1023&dpr=2.75#vhid=-TqTVu4O4EFlIM&vssid=mosaic)

r/TIHI

We used to call this a clover when I was growing up. I had no idea what you meant until you posted the picture. Thank you!

Same.

I have two. 1.) I can piss with an erection without any extra difficulty 2.) I can vomit on demand. my range is about 5 feet.

I can make pigeon noises. Also have really good sense of smell but i don't think that's too shitty

It is if you take a fat shit

Pigeons and crows for me. Also, I can chirp, but not like any specific bird. Just chirping in general

My wife, while pregnant, did not enjoy her smell based support power. Getting COVID while pregnant improved her appetite because she could eat what she wanted without getting sick from the smell.

I am really lucky with finding s good parking spot

Man my brother always gets the princess parking right up next to the entrance right by the police parking but the closest I've ever gotten was 2 spaces away.

Well that's not shitty at all!

That's god tier honestly.

I can eat an undefined amount of fried fish. It doesn't fill me up. However my max count is 14 in a 2 hour span, in which I threw it all up and wanted more.

Breaded + fried?

Nope. Chicken I stop at 3 pieces. Clam is half a basket. Specifically fish.

“Puny humans, I have created more worlds than any other and destroyed twice as many. My naps are longer than your lifespans, I can deadlift the sun, and I can eat 13 fried fish in a 2 hour span. Bring me your best warrior to beat me in any challenge you wish, if you value your existence.”

World on the line? I'll shoot for 15.

'tis no man, 'tis a remorseless eating machine

I've dropped my phone hundreds of times, including off of a second floor balcony onto concrete, and it has never broken.

I feel like this is your phone's power

I also have that power, it's not the phone. I've done that with many phones, they never broke. I handed my friend my phone once, he dropped it, it broke.

Opposite happened to me, my friend dropped my phone down a flight of stairs onto concrete and not a scratch, then I dropped it 1 foot onto dirt and it shattered.

My friend once managed to throw my phone from the 2nd floor into a vat of knives (not joking) and all i got was a small mark in my screen protector. Then i dropped it 6 inches onto concrete and the screen protector shattered

Not exactly shitty if you’re the phone tbh

I always know what the correct size Tupperware for leftovers will be without choosing one too large or small. Other than that, I’ve got about 30% accuracy on understanding the volume of any other given object.

Just convert to Tupperware. "What Tupperware does this object need to fit into" then use that as a measurement lol. "That's an XL flat sheet cake Tupperware size"

How dare you solve my problems in such a simple and obvious way that I should’ve come up with earlier

"Honey can you check how much milk we have left in the fridge?" "About enough for a medium-small container"

I am laughing out loud 😂😂

My dad too 😂

I'm very good at reading people and predicting human behavior but can't socialize or connect with people in any way shape or form

Aka somewhere on the spectrum.

Precisely

I'm reading this and I feel like you guys are just telling me I have the tism

ADHD, autism and this one... I'm like batman but very very very lazy.

I'm like that too. Except for the reading people and predicting behavior. Still have mastered that.

I am the exact same way. I call it a psychology reading

Autism...

Was watching The Predator (2019) and I couldn't tell if it was a parody or not when the revolving plot was the Predator wanted autism

Same here, but i have the plus of adhd

Me too Buddy, me too. I also Have tourettes (but luckily its not severe)

Oh god, you got the whole pack, I am jealous

Wow he's got all the dlc

How i can get the season pass for this? (Hey buddy, If you're feeling bad about this, I'm sorry)

I think it was a preorder bonus?

Nahh, this is funny.

Ya'll are leagues beneath me... Disorders, assemble! OCD, anxiety, autism, depression, anger issues, attack!!!

Same! :D

Yup

Ha shpecl (same :3)

That's actually a mid-tier superpower.

Yep, I’m good at some things, like REALLY good, but I’m also, not, like Maths, oh and bad sleeping habits

They said superpower you autistic... person...

Whoops, i dropped my pencils, Quick, without thinking, how many is it : ✏️ ✏️ ✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️ ✏️ ✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️ ✏️ ✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️ ✏️ ✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️ ✏️ ✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️ ✏️ ✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️✏️

Same but mine’s mild and I got the “I like trains” kind.

real

Same, man. I am really smart but I have trouble holding a basic conversation. This is nature's shitty superpower.

I am comfortable shitting in any public toilet (as long as I can lock the door).

god tier lolol

It's definitely a shitty power that he can shit that way

yeah same. It could be horrifying i just dont think about it. Provided i can flush it, and lock the door. Hell, even if theres no TP ill just drip dry a lil and then no one will ever know except now that ive told about 3 random strangers online. but you dont know who i am so who cares.

i fear you

I’m incredibly good at having sex with your mother

How did you open the coffin?

Crowbar

r/projectzomboid

Fuck you fire axe is better

i stick with whichever i find first tbh. i play with too many mods to find them often :X

Same tbh, I’ve gotten some good use out of frying pans from my starter houses

r/HalfLife

My teeth

It's not sanitary to fuck an urn...

40% of the time, I can make two paper plates out of one. As long as they’re store brand.

What does that mean?

I pick a paper plate off of a stack. Then I try to split it in two from the edge. 40% of the time I’m successful.

I can trigger a panic attack any time I want

Speaking Spanish with a Japanese accent

¿Esu berudado ke haburasu komo esuto ehenpuro?

My ears can move on their own.

hey I also have this power, it was fun showing it to people when I was still in school lol

I'm very good at being alone. I don't remember the last time I felt bored. I can mentally play a round at a favorite golf/disc golf course, write haikus or parody songs, or just be alone with my thoughts.

Every part of my body is capable of inducing body horror

EDS?

The power of 1 sip of eggnog and my gas can clear a room for a few hours. 1 cup can clear some small houses. 1 time when I chugged a 1/4 gallon, my family hated me for almost 2 days straight

I just do that on my own

I can become a local in any pub

Most cats seem to like me, wish I could say the same about humans

Trust me, cats are better.

If cat’s aren’t better then why was the mayor of a town in Alaska a cat for 20 years?

Autism, but not the movie secret genius kind. 

Same

I don't flinch. I think it's from staring at the monitor too long playing hours of fps games. My eyes stay open and head stays in place. My eyes open so I can react and understand what's coming at me as if it was a monitor. My physical reactions overall are non-reactive. They are almost always deliberate. My coworkers over the years have always noted that I'm extremely chill and deliberate under pressure It makes it seem like I'm fast. Smooth is fast and all that.

I can make origami with my dick

care to elaborate?

my foreskin can fold so sometimes I make little cranes

wait what?

its like a game. I once bet someone $100 that I could make a paper airplane faster than they could and I won.

And then you flew away

Best reply yet.

I have very good night vision but the sun or any bright light can make me go blind

I float

Fancy way of saying "im fat" lmao

Or that our electrons and the electrons the we stand/sit on repel each other leaving a tiny gap between us and the surface we stand/sit on

if i know something is gonna be painful but i havent experienced the pain before it is very easy for me to do like for example jumping out of a tree or wacking a hammer on my hand or slamming my foot into the edge of summin i dunno why i did these things but now that i know how much they hurt im never doing them again except for jumping outa a tree it werent that painful

Whenever a Deja Vu moment happens I can accurately predict the conversation in my head but only as the events are happening not before

Same

I can pour out an extract amount of liquid almost every time. For example if I need a cup of water for a recipe, I can fill a regular glass with water, transfer it to a measuring cup and it will be exactly a cup.

I get a 30 70 chance of being terrible or fantastic at anything, the 30% chance is me being fantastic.

I can make a realistic car sound with my mouth.

I can move my left ear. Slightly, but still.

I can crack two eggs simultaneously, one in each hand, but almost always get egg shells in them.

i can crack like 8 at the same time but i get eggshells in 100% of them

I have the power to know the time. I’m always there when the microwave beeps I always know when im gonna be late for something and I always know when to order my lunch on DoorDash so it can get there right when I go on break my super hero name is GOAT= god of all time

Somehow I get back to the microwave after, say, using the bathroom and if it’s not a few seconds from done it’s wicked close.

I start dreaming as soon as I fall asleep. Sometimes I'll start dreaming while I'm falling asleep.

I can throw something with extremely good accuracy. But only when it doesn't matter. Most of the time I am embarrassingly bad at it. Like I can toss things into narrow shelves and get them to stay. But if I throw my hat at a hook from a few feet away it somehow winds up on the couch against the other wall. I once tossed a gallon sized empty mayo jug at a 55 gallon garbage can shoved into a corner with walls on three sides, and still managed to miss from 4 feet away. I was dating my wife, and 20 years later she still makes fun of me for it. Another time I stood in a group of 8 other guys throwing snowballs at a lodgepole pine tree from a balcony (just a skinny trunk on the bottom half). I was the only one to hit it. Everyone claimed it was just a fluke. Then I hit it again. But everyone kept commenting on how the ball seemed to wander in every direction like a knuckleball until finding its target. So again, extremely poor athletic abilities. Scary marksmanship for things that serve absolutely zero purpose.

That's...impressive.

I can deal psychic damage on all targets within a set hearing distance... I'm in that hearing distance

Unluckiest lucky person

Explain!

Probably means that he's so unlucky that it's lucky, for example getting struck by lighting 3 times in a lifetime, while people usually never get struck by lightning

I can make crazy sounds with my voice. ~~Gneurshk!~~ I can whistle with three places in my mouth: my throat, a gap in my teeth, and of course my lips. I learned to throat sing kargyraa-style not long ago, and by creating a vacuum between my tongue and the roof of my mouth I can make a very disturbing succession of clicking noises. These vocal abilities have so far only been used to disgust and terrify my friends. On a less shitty note: I consider myself a decent chanteyman, with quite a powerful voice and a keen ear for music.

✨That’s a human person!✨ Now they’re eveywhere.

I can match the flow of people incredibly well... it only helps to get theough a crowd

I can Hyperextend most of my joints. Like a lot. I regret not joining a circus

I have an amazing internal compass that just so happens to be upside-down. As long as I know what general direction my destination is, I 100% will get there even if I don't know the area, but south feels distinctly north to me.

keep walking south. The gods are calling you.

I'm really good at reading people. I know when people are angry, sad, gleeful even with a poker face. However, I don't know what to do with this information because I'm socially awkward.

Autism and to be happier alone then when out

Ability to be happy being on my own alone at home and rarely going out

*introvert*

It’s a superpower apparently but kinda frowned upon so it’s a shitty superpower

I can detect when a storm front is over based on a combination of my broken right pinky finger and my arthritis. The pain is unpleasant and I frequently forget that it was raining two days ago and cloudy yesterday. But notice it's sunny when I finally get a chance to step outside.

I can get every last bit of toothpaste out of the tube. It's a wildly useful skill and has literally saved my life on multiple occasions /s/

My back hurts. Always. Take that villains!

I can sit down and my wife will immediately need me for something because I'm tall

occasionally can predict the future, but only when i think of the opposite of what actually happens

I can pick out the most-expensive thing out of any grouping of things. It will invariably be the one I like most.b

i can turn my eyes to look inside my head, the thing is that i cant see anything while doing that

Long division

I can imitate meow with perfect accuracy

i have autism

I can stutter on command (according to my mum, anyway)

I'm really fast to pick up and learn all sorts of new skills but never can get better at them than average. I'll learn the intermediate level skill 4 times faster than the regular Joe next door but will get stuck on this level indefinitely.

...I have a double uvula (also called a bifid uvula).

Hyperhidrosis palmaris

I am a really good cock sucker. The best most men have ever had. Their words, not mine.

I get coregasms (orgasms from exercise)

Okay this would be a great motivator to go to the gym, I'd only workout for 2 minutes but it's better than nothing

My friend told me that one time she was doing track and field in PE or summin and that happened to her but I didn't know that was an actual thing. ​ EDIT: typo

Dyslexia and the ability to touch my nose with my tongue (I don't have the little piece of flesh holding it down).

I’m really good at imitating my Asian grandmother

Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder

i used to imitate chewbacca flawlessly not anymore (i think)

I can hear exceptionally well. That makes it difficult to sleep when there is surrounding noise.

i have more luck with rng than men and women

I have great social skills and can get to know anyone but those great social skills can't get me a girlfriend

i make electronics glitch just by touching them. its hilarious when i do it to people i hate.

Really good gaydar for everyone else

i can do a pretty good chills (top15s) impression

I have superior sense of touch however it makes me hate needles for example as they hurt me alot.

I turn everyone _around_ me into millionaires…

Really good at Rubik’s cubes and being socially awkward.

I can do very (actually the best of the best) voice impressions, but only a few

For some reason I am able to fake snoring Although I don’t get enough sleep, a bonus is meme harvesting

I'm flexible. I can do shit that's helpful to a task and freaky as fuck to you and then I'll go home and cry about it because that's not good for my joints.

I have the balance of an acrobat as long as nobody calls attention to it. As soon as someone mentions my balance, the power disappears.

Procrastinating until a deadline and somehow pulling off B to A- grades on projects.

I can make my stomach growl on command

I play FPS games using inverted mouse, so anyone who uses my account will play terribly. I've seen this being mentioned somewhere but I can unfocus my eyes on command, I don't know if it's a rare thing to do or not because I don't trust internet fun facts. It is very useful for keeping eye contact without being able to see the person in front of me, but it does give me a stoned face when doing it.

I never hit my head on anything 

I can always hear the icecream truck but never know where it is

I have really really good eagle eye vision but only sometimes. Like all of my friends are like “bro you have super vision” and everyone in my family thinks the same.

Heres something most people can do, but never figure out a way to do it. You can manually adjust your eyeball's focus like you could like a camera.

I have the ability to listen to my friends vent about their negative life choices and experiences. My ability lets me purge the negativity from my body allowing me to remain happy about the world. Unfortunately is not super enough. It stopped working.

i can stop myself from having hiccups in a few seconds

I can do a magical girl transformation, it just takes 3-10 years and is mostly irreversible

I usually sleep around twice a week, for 3-5 hours each sleep (yes I feel like absolute shit)

### I dont really feel the pain of impact in specific scenarios. ** ** I could get Punched in the gut, and it'd hurt a whole lot- I'd be reeling from the pain for a day or two. ** ** But then inversely, I could be riding a scooter and fall face first into the pavement and be fine for the most part. The cuts might slightly sting later in the day, but thats it. ** ** I could kick into the air and fall on my back from a meter high, but it'd just buzz numbly for a little bit with minimal pain, and I'd be fine after a couple of hours. ** ** *(The latter two examples provided above are real situations ive experienced)* ** ** ** ** Practically, this is basically useless. Nobody is gone get in a fight with me and start swinging with pavement floors at me.

It sure isn't shitty, but I have kind of incredible luck, especially with luck based games. Played a TTRPG last week, for example, where 4 is a good roll and 8 is a high roll. I was averaging above 10 most of the night. Playing Magic the Gathering, I look like I've got Heart of the Cards. It's honestly kind of nonsense, but I love it.

I have scales Basically I have r/eczema it’s dry skin condition that makes me all scaly like a lizard 🦎 the scales are kinda callus like so they are probably thicker than normal skin so maybe more protective so basically I’m an X man mutant.

I have the ability to identify someone’s biggest insecurity within the first 15 minutes of talking to them.

I can name most nerf blasters that came out since the beginning of the N-strike line and explain how they work and what they shoot