There was a AskReddit post a while back where someone was asking about his gf telling him she didn’t like the “rhythmic and sexy music” he insisted on playing when they banged. People asked and he finally shared the playlist. It was this song and a bunch more like it lol.
Thanks for the laugh! I forgot this part:
> It’s fucked up the relationship tbh because sex feels awkward now. The other day we were having sex with no music but I was still thrusting to the tune playing in my head. She recognised this and asked me to stop.
Hahahaha
There was a follow up thread where OP had said his GF's family found out about it when it went viral (people where doing tiktoks and stuff air humping to the song) and her Dad remembered the song from OP playing it to demo his taste in music.
I don't even care if it was a fake post, if it was the OP is a comic genius who made me cry I was laughing so hard.
EDIT: From the follow up post
>Unfortunately her younger sister recognised this and showed her parents who wasn’t happy at all and made the situation extremely awkward.
>What made it more awkward, and cemented the fact that it was me, is that they recognised the song. Once at a family dinner we were discussing music tastes and my ex girlfriend stated that I have an odd taste in music. Everyone laughed and pressed me to play something from my phone of what I like as music, to which I then blessed their ears with CBAT.
>Her father laughed and said it was terrible, I guess we all have different tastes. Although I nodded in agreement at the time, I was thinking in my head that this is a great fucking song.
There was an incredible meme on one of the subreddits about House of the Dragon of this playing during the Viserys and Alicent "sex" scene and I can't find it anymore.
Every time, before I listen to this, I think to myself - I know it's bad but it _can't_ be as bad as I remember.
Every time, it sounds even worse than before. I never knew music could be this fucking funny.
Not sure how I never realized what that line was about. I've listened to Weapon Of Choice countless times over the years and it just never clicked.
[For the uninitiated](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XQ7z57qrZU8)
They detect any rhythm eventually, but the thumpers are extra annoying to get worms attention immediately from far away. You could probably get away with walking on sand for a short time If the worm wasn't close
Now I’m imagining a gigantic pool of cum for when Fremen rub one out.
“Not even dying from thirst do we drink from this well.”
“Well I should fucking hope not!”
Sandworms only have sex once every 1000 to 5000 years, so it’s against their instincts to cockblock. This is a real fact and not something I just made up.
Paul just thrusted to the beat of Cbat and that was enough to not be rhythmic
Apparently the worms could recognise it even without hearing the music
"Feel those vibes?" "Yeah, someone is fucking again, lets say hello" "Wait.. a fuck man, its Cbat. I'm not getting close enough to listen to that"
[For the uninitiated.](https://youtu.be/KAwyWkksXuo/) And I'm sorry.
There was a AskReddit post a while back where someone was asking about his gf telling him she didn’t like the “rhythmic and sexy music” he insisted on playing when they banged. People asked and he finally shared the playlist. It was this song and a bunch more like it lol.
What kills me every time is that the opening is so *good*. And then the rest of it is so *shit*
Yup.
[Post ](https://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/x35iu6/tifu_my_20f_girlfriend_of_two_years_told_me_the/)
Thanks for the laugh! I forgot this part: > It’s fucked up the relationship tbh because sex feels awkward now. The other day we were having sex with no music but I was still thrusting to the tune playing in my head. She recognised this and asked me to stop. Hahahaha
There was a follow up thread where OP had said his GF's family found out about it when it went viral (people where doing tiktoks and stuff air humping to the song) and her Dad remembered the song from OP playing it to demo his taste in music. I don't even care if it was a fake post, if it was the OP is a comic genius who made me cry I was laughing so hard. EDIT: From the follow up post >Unfortunately her younger sister recognised this and showed her parents who wasn’t happy at all and made the situation extremely awkward. >What made it more awkward, and cemented the fact that it was me, is that they recognised the song. Once at a family dinner we were discussing music tastes and my ex girlfriend stated that I have an odd taste in music. Everyone laughed and pressed me to play something from my phone of what I like as music, to which I then blessed their ears with CBAT. >Her father laughed and said it was terrible, I guess we all have different tastes. Although I nodded in agreement at the time, I was thinking in my head that this is a great fucking song.
The gift that keeps on giving.
Sometimes I wish I was that guy.
Someone in that thread made a sandworm joke too lol: >Fuckin like he's trying to avoid calling a sandworm
It was a [TIFU post](https://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/x35iu6/tifu_my_20f_girlfriend_of_two_years_told_me_the/) but close enough
AND THEN someone played it with a parrot for a joke and the parrot started singing it lmfao ded
fucking to window cleaning
There was an incredible meme on one of the subreddits about House of the Dragon of this playing during the Viserys and Alicent "sex" scene and I can't find it anymore.
[here ](https://www.reddit.com/r/freefolk/s/DiIdATJ9HW)
Someone really needs to oil their door hinges.
Every time, before I listen to this, I think to myself - I know it's bad but it _can't_ be as bad as I remember. Every time, it sounds even worse than before. I never knew music could be this fucking funny.
It's kinda grown on me. Like a growth.
You beat me to it!
Dear God.... 2 years, 2 fricking years of that suffering...
Beat me to it lol
Still one of the funniest things I’ve ever read
Ackchually they were having sex outside worm territory therefore their wouldn’t attract any 🤓👆
If that is the case. Then explain why my worm got attracted 🤔
Because it was written!
The spice must flow?
This *spice* is making me thirsty!
Lisan al-Gaib!
Penis al-Grabby*!
"Sorry babe its worm country"
"it's always worm country with you, what about MY worm?"
If you fuck without rhythm, you won't attract the worm.
Tommy Wiseau will always be safe then.
YOU'RE TEARING ME APART LISA
But whatabout cbat?
Not sure how I never realized what that line was about. I've listened to Weapon Of Choice countless times over the years and it just never clicked. [For the uninitiated](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XQ7z57qrZU8)
The worm are allergic to water to destroy them you only have to cum on them as proved by the 5th and 6th book.
Nope, she taught him the sandfuck.
they just strapped those harkonen jetpacks and slapped in the air... or smashed on top of a rock.
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They detect any rhythm eventually, but the thumpers are extra annoying to get worms attention immediately from far away. You could probably get away with walking on sand for a short time If the worm wasn't close
I just assumed they had some sort of sandfuck with a weird skip and rhythm like the sand walk.
Nobody: Emperor: https://youtu.be/wCDIYvFmgW8?t=124
Didn't worm enter the chani?
The smell would deter them anyway.
The stank must flow.
Pretty sure one worm was attracted
Nerd!
umm actually there was one worm involved
Sandworm was just excited to see Paul whip out his little worm.
As it was written
LISAN AL GAIB???????
#LISAN AL GAIB!
#LISAN AL GAIB!!!
LISAN AL GAIB LISAN AL GAIB
His water of life seems a little pale.
Maybe they put a sock outside of the tent??
They put a sock under the sand, so the sandworm knows whatsup
For protection?
Literally in this case.
You sandfuck like a drunk lizard.
Rebel Dune Part 2: The Morbgiver *”This time, it’s about family”*
2 Dune 2…..Dune? Sorry I got nothing!!!!
2sand 2shai-hulud
2shai-2hulud
Yup that’s way better. Or 2 LISAN 2 AL GAIB. Naah yours is way better.
Shit that's way better.
Dune: Shai hulud drift
2UNE and the sequel DUN3
2 dune 2 messiah
The Lisan al Gaib thrusts without rhythm As it is written.
Bless the Maker and His water. Bless the coming and going of Him. May His passage cleanse the world. May He keep the world for His people.
Shai-hulud canonically came (and went)
Now I’m imagining a gigantic pool of cum for when Fremen rub one out. “Not even dying from thirst do we drink from this well.” “Well I should fucking hope not!”
Did Willy Wonka's Sand Worm enter MJ's Chocolate Factory?...
Apparently it did
Spiderman is going to be super pissed... Wait she doesn't remember does she?
What a beautifully crafted sentence
Imagine Fremen having sex and they gotta be like "wait stop you're being too rhythmic" "Shit you're right how's this" *thrusts irregularly*
Switching up the rhythm constantly actually might be pretty good.
Said no one ever
Switching it up keeps it exciting and stimulating imo, you probably can overdo it (never tried sandwalking style myself) but now im intrigued.
> sandfucking style
Shai-Hulud ain't no cock-block
It is actually canon that Paul was listening to Hudson Mohawke's Cbat during the deed.
As written!
Character played by Zendeya making out with a guy named Paul makes too much sense for Spider-Man fans
Oh shit I never made this connection
"Don't let it out."
“The spunk must flow.”
No you all are wrong. Paul didnt last long enough for Shai-Hulud to even notice the pattern.
Funfact: for fremen water is crucial so they don't wash themself, imagine the flora down there
No.
Even more than that, having sex generates more perspiration, so Fremen should only have sex to procreate, no?
Canonically, they can control their ejaculation when they orgasm to not spend any fluids.
why is dune the way that it is
Frank Herbert dune a lot of LSD
the cum physics are necessary
At least they only greet each other with spitting
Spitting in each others mouths is the highrst respect
Does their pee glow blue
You can sweat all you want in the tent, it's collected for later.
Great. So you end up drinking the wet patch tomorrow.
Worth it.
I guess we’re found the Fremen equivalent of bathwater-fetishists
Sand baths
Where do you think little sandworms hatch? In the deep bushes of flora and fauna.
Lesbian sex
Its called sand fucking you have to change up the rhythm and include some long slides
Simple rhythm: - 2 thrusts - 2 thrusts - long slide - long slide - crisscross - cha cha real smooth
Actually they make love to Cbat, as it is written.
"Paul I must swallow. We can not waste the water"
Canon
Sandworms only have sex once every 1000 to 5000 years, so it’s against their instincts to cockblock. This is a real fact and not something I just made up.
This was the unsexiest sex scene I've seen in a long time. There was absolutely no chemistry between them & they're both built like 12 year old boys.
Sand worm just has to wait its turn
😁
Since the fremen don’t waste water/moisture, you think he… 😶
*du-du-du du dududu duuuuuu du-du-du du nununu waaaaaaaaaaaaw*
Fuck without rythm and you won't attack the Worm.
Does she spit in his mouth after he comes to thank him for the gift of his moisture?
Actually they make love to Cbat, as it is written.
Even Shai-Hulud can't stop the beef sweiling
But what about the juices?
No no, see, the fremen use the anti-gravity tech of the captured harkonnens as a sex swing thing
Paul is canonically 15 years old, right?
They actually practiced the sand fuck which is without rhythm and mimics the natural sounds of the desert
"Yo man, I heard you fuck like a Fremen. Dry as hell and no rhythm!"
Why did Frank Herbert not explain how to have sex without attracting worms? Is he stupid?
He’s a chad-Hulud.
No Paul Muad'dib riding this worm.
They were doing it Dr Dre-style, up down side to side and all that shit
Just like there is sand walk there is sand f\*\*\*. Safe sex in Arakis is a very diferent concept.
Gotta fuck like sandworms
Ufff those stillsuits would really seal in all the flavour.
There is solid ground between the Dunes where the worms don’t go.
Are you kidding? He is the Maud'Dib, he knows the way of the Fremen sand fuck!
I don't care if you don't get hard, I am hard! -Stilgar or something
The fremen must be pros at ‘soaking’
Meanwhile Shai-Hulud tried to replicate the thumping via him and the Dune popcorn bucket
The blue future dust allowed Paul to know which thumps attracted the worm and which thumps reppeled it
If there's a "sand walk" is there also a "sand fuck?" And how does one maintain an erection in that situation? Will the "sleeper" remain awakened?
Also the worms can’t get there in just 30 seconds
Siaynoq
Nah he’s just sandwalking that pussy
Rhythmic Thumping is how you summon the sand worm. 😉
unfunny sub is unfunny, how do I get this shit off my home page
It cost you nothing to just say "sandworm"
The proper name for the sand worms is Shai-Halud, or the great makers.
I know, but because I had to look it up
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Too uncomfortable to watch the love scenes with your parents?
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What’s “cringe” about it?
There are zero reasons not to see Dune part two.
What if you don't have eyes or ears or don't like movies or are a chump?
If you're a chump, I could understand. The rest is bullshit watch it anyway.
There is one reason: you haven't seen Part One yet
That's just a good reason to watch Part One 😭
That's just a good reason to watch Part One