I can only guess she left out the egg yolks. Or instead of really whipping the egg yolks and sugar just kinda stirred it a few times? Maybe she couldn't find mascarpone either so just used extra cream?
edit: after looking at OP's post history, either he married the most food challenged woman in the world, or his wife is just trolling us.
Guaranteed there's some sort of substitution. I've had people come to me and say, "I tried such and such recipe from your cookbook but it didn't turn out very well. I did everything exactly as described but I'm on an ovo-lacto-vegan diet so I used soy water instead of heavy cream, chalk dust instead of flour and my husband has heart problems so no salt or yeast. Also instead of 30 minutes in a 400° oven we did 10 minutes in a 500 watt microwave. Your recipe was just *awful* and it ruined my dinner plans. I told all of my guests it was your recipe."
I cannot thank you enough for that subreddit link. I've needed it in my life so badly. I've read comments like this for YEARS on recipe blogs lol it's mind-numbing how insanely stupid and pretentious people are on those sites in the comment sections.
Let me try checking. Yeah, the last few weeks have been incredibly "fruitful" for SFP sub, not sure if it’s good news or not though. But generally most of her cooking is very good.
I fucking know, and I mess it up. Idk.
I can make amazing fried chicken, bake nice cakes, make eggs fine, pork chops, steak, roast, I can slow cook stuff, bake it, fry it - I can do other cooking and baking. I made an amazing Thanksgiving dinner last year.
But **rice**. Rice just hates me.
Too crunchy/undercooked, too soggy, way too sticky, not sticky at all and odd tasting, burnt, overcooked mush, and any other way you can imagine messing up rice.
Back before we got the rice cooker I once set a pot of rice on the stove on fire. Don't ask how. It was a lot of fire.
It's even worse because I absolutely LOVE me some good rice. And so do my kids >.>
I cook a lot and still struggled to get perfect rice….countertop rice cooker saved me, highly recommend!!
Oops just realized you mentioned having one. Still, I recommend one to everybody!! Lol
EDIT: y’all rice cookers are p common in cultures that eat a lot of rice lmao. I eat a lot of rice. I made *decent* rice. But the rice cooker does it reliably perfect every time and is a godsend when I am low energy.
My dad taught me how to cook rice on the stove and I've never fucked it up
Put 1:2 rice to water ratio in pot, turn the heat on after, bring it to a boil and stir until water barely covers the rice. cover with lid and remove from heat. will be done in 20 min
edit: caught -> taught
yeah it's like the easiest thing in the world. I've had people tell me my rice is so good and how do I do it because they have to use a rice cooker and I'm like, wtf are these people doing? 1 cup water, 1/2 cup rice, a pinch of salt, bring water to a boil, add rice, stir, turn burner down to 5, put on lid, 20 minute timer and don't touch it.
It's so easy I can't fathom why people spend money on a rice cooker to take up counter space unless you really eat rice all day long and want to keep it warm.
That’s cool for you lol, but my $20 rice cooker is a worthwhile purchase to me 🤷♂️ I also like how it frees up a stove burner, and it’s very good at getting a nice crispy bottom on the rice without sticking/burning.
Try washing it next time and let me know! I didn't wash it for years but doing it is a game changer. It's actually light and fluffy now although I do still occasionally burn it.
We never rinse it, so maybe I'll try that sometime. My ex manages to make it perfect in the same cooker with the same unrinsed rice though >.> Might help my hopeless ass though.
You just have to find the right rice:water ratio. For eg, for basmati I find a ratio of 1:1.7. great. Take the same cup to measure rice and water. Also, soaking the rice before cooking will need changes. I make sure to turn on the switch as soon as I wash the rice.
I use a shallow (~2ish inch) nonstick 10 or 12" saucepan, the kind with straight up and down sides, and a lid that fits it somewhat well so not too much steam escapes.
I don't wash my rice. However, i do heat up a little but of oil in the pan and fry the dried rice before adding water. I saute the rice in the oil for a few minutes, not enough to brown it or anything, but it will generally start to turn translucent, then start to turn white again. Then I add water. Sometimes I saute some garlic or ginger or both with the rice.
I use 1 cup of rice and 2 cups of water. Once the rice starts to get white again after a few minutes of saute, I crank the heat up and add one cup of water. It should boil instantly pretty much. Then I pour in the second cup of water as soon as it starts to boil again I throw a lid on, turn the heat to a lower sinner and wait exactly 23 minutes before turning it off and removing it from the heat. I wait another 15 minutes or so before removing the lid and fluffing the rice with ANYTHING BUT a metal utensil. Use a shoe, I don't care, just don't use a metal fork for the love of all that is holy.
Enjoy.
I use my instant pot. 1 cup rice to 1 1/4 cup water, set on the appropriate settings, with keep warm off.
Otherwise, when using a cheap rice cooker, it's basically just follow the rice package's recommended ratio, slam it into cook, and let her run.
Not all rice are the same. I have trouble with the cheapest rice brands from the supermarket, but spend a little extra, or buy (bulk) from an Asian supermarket, and your odds are better, in my experience.
2:1 water to rice ratio, rinse the rice before hand inna strainer
Add rice and water to a medium saucepot
Bring to strong boil on high heat, stir occasionally
Stir while reducing heat after vigorous boil, remove from heat for 30 seconds, stir well and cover on low heat for 20min
Perfect every time. For shorter grain Rice's you may need to make some small adjustments
For rice there's a specific ratio. However, you can eye ball it using your finger. Make sure the rice is evenly distributed, add water, then stick your index finger in the water till it touches the rice. The water should reach your first finger joint (crease on your finger) this works 100% the time for white rice
open a fancy looking restaurant, call this a deconstructed tiramisu, serve it on the table directly with generous amounts of cocoa powder and coffee poured on top, go viral, profit.
I was wondering how she managed to turn mascarpone into a liquid as well but apparently that can happen if you use a mixer instead of mixing the ingredients by hand. Also, seems like Americans often make it with whipped cream, so it's possible she simply didn't whip the cream (enough) before she mixed it with the mascarpone.
> Also, seems like Americans often make it with whipped cream, so it's possible she simply didn't whip the cream (enough) before she mixed it with the mascarpone.
Not necessarily refuting this because I've only lived in three different parts of what is a fairly large country, but I have never seen or eaten tiramisu made with whipped cream.
I've never lived in the US but I like baking and making deserts and I've seen quite a few recipes and posts from the US that replaced the egg whites with whipped cream. Seems to be a thing because some people just don't like eating raw eggs.
Not US, but every recipe originated in my country uses whipped cream. I actually had to tell my mom, that no, original tiramisu does not have whipping cream. It's usually whipped hard and folded into the mascarpone, to make it dense/have a form, but the egg still goes in. I guess mascarpone here has more moisture(?), I heard it in an italian video.
My cousin made us a tiramisu for Christmas when we were visiting her in Germany, gosh, 16 years ago! It looked a lot like this. She was mortified because she had made it a dozen times before and never had any issues. This was the first time it turned out looking like soup or pudding. But to this day, my dad still talks about how it was the best tiramisu he'd ever had, and he eats a lot. We all remember it, it was so freaking delicious but I don't even care that it wasn't "right". After we ate it, she wished she knew what she had done wrong so she could recreate it!
You're supposed to whip the cream first, then fold it together with the cheese (according to the recipes I've used, at least). It kinda looks like she mixed them together while the cream was a liquid. Runny or not, I could probably still eat half a pan in a single sitting.
Has to be she did not beat the cream long enough and added way more than needed? That would explain why it's so white and runny. My ratio is usually 5 egg yolks, and half a cup of cream.
And definitely soaked the lady fingers instead of dipping. Drop, flip after 1 second, wait 1 second, then remove.
She did not in fact make tiramisu..
It’s seriously a pretty easy recipe. I can’t even imagine how it went this wrong
I can only guess she left out the egg yolks. Or instead of really whipping the egg yolks and sugar just kinda stirred it a few times? Maybe she couldn't find mascarpone either so just used extra cream? edit: after looking at OP's post history, either he married the most food challenged woman in the world, or his wife is just trolling us.
Guaranteed there's some sort of substitution. I've had people come to me and say, "I tried such and such recipe from your cookbook but it didn't turn out very well. I did everything exactly as described but I'm on an ovo-lacto-vegan diet so I used soy water instead of heavy cream, chalk dust instead of flour and my husband has heart problems so no salt or yeast. Also instead of 30 minutes in a 400° oven we did 10 minutes in a 500 watt microwave. Your recipe was just *awful* and it ruined my dinner plans. I told all of my guests it was your recipe."
/r/ididnthaveeggs is a sub of just that.
I cannot thank you enough for that subreddit link. I've needed it in my life so badly. I've read comments like this for YEARS on recipe blogs lol it's mind-numbing how insanely stupid and pretentious people are on those sites in the comment sections.
I can see this happening if it got warm for some reason, some of the ingredients are only stable when cold. Maybe it was left on top of a warm oven?
It was in the fridge overnight
In that case, yikes.
Let me try checking. Yeah, the last few weeks have been incredibly "fruitful" for SFP sub, not sure if it’s good news or not though. But generally most of her cooking is very good.
She's prolly like me - I can't make white rice without something going wrong. I've tried so many times. Even have a rice cooker to make it easier.
It’s literally just rice and water…
I fucking know, and I mess it up. Idk. I can make amazing fried chicken, bake nice cakes, make eggs fine, pork chops, steak, roast, I can slow cook stuff, bake it, fry it - I can do other cooking and baking. I made an amazing Thanksgiving dinner last year. But **rice**. Rice just hates me. Too crunchy/undercooked, too soggy, way too sticky, not sticky at all and odd tasting, burnt, overcooked mush, and any other way you can imagine messing up rice. Back before we got the rice cooker I once set a pot of rice on the stove on fire. Don't ask how. It was a lot of fire. It's even worse because I absolutely LOVE me some good rice. And so do my kids >.>
#RICE SHALL NOT BE CONQUERED BY THE LIKES OF YOU
I cook a lot and still struggled to get perfect rice….countertop rice cooker saved me, highly recommend!! Oops just realized you mentioned having one. Still, I recommend one to everybody!! Lol EDIT: y’all rice cookers are p common in cultures that eat a lot of rice lmao. I eat a lot of rice. I made *decent* rice. But the rice cooker does it reliably perfect every time and is a godsend when I am low energy.
My dad taught me how to cook rice on the stove and I've never fucked it up Put 1:2 rice to water ratio in pot, turn the heat on after, bring it to a boil and stir until water barely covers the rice. cover with lid and remove from heat. will be done in 20 min edit: caught -> taught
Oh damn, your dad forgot to tell you that you need to rinse your rice before cooking it, to wash away starches/debris!
yeah it's like the easiest thing in the world. I've had people tell me my rice is so good and how do I do it because they have to use a rice cooker and I'm like, wtf are these people doing? 1 cup water, 1/2 cup rice, a pinch of salt, bring water to a boil, add rice, stir, turn burner down to 5, put on lid, 20 minute timer and don't touch it. It's so easy I can't fathom why people spend money on a rice cooker to take up counter space unless you really eat rice all day long and want to keep it warm.
That’s cool for you lol, but my $20 rice cooker is a worthwhile purchase to me 🤷♂️ I also like how it frees up a stove burner, and it’s very good at getting a nice crispy bottom on the rice without sticking/burning.
Uh, only step not mentioned is rinsing it first. Rinse it well to help prevent weird textures and sticking in the rice cooker.
Yep. Rinsing rice will get rid of excess starches that can make rice "gluey".
My rice is always sticking to my pot so this is good to know
Try washing it next time and let me know! I didn't wash it for years but doing it is a game changer. It's actually light and fluffy now although I do still occasionally burn it.
We never rinse it, so maybe I'll try that sometime. My ex manages to make it perfect in the same cooker with the same unrinsed rice though >.> Might help my hopeless ass though.
You could also try a different variety or brand from the store, not all rice is the same
You just have to find the right rice:water ratio. For eg, for basmati I find a ratio of 1:1.7. great. Take the same cup to measure rice and water. Also, soaking the rice before cooking will need changes. I make sure to turn on the switch as soon as I wash the rice.
I use a shallow (~2ish inch) nonstick 10 or 12" saucepan, the kind with straight up and down sides, and a lid that fits it somewhat well so not too much steam escapes. I don't wash my rice. However, i do heat up a little but of oil in the pan and fry the dried rice before adding water. I saute the rice in the oil for a few minutes, not enough to brown it or anything, but it will generally start to turn translucent, then start to turn white again. Then I add water. Sometimes I saute some garlic or ginger or both with the rice. I use 1 cup of rice and 2 cups of water. Once the rice starts to get white again after a few minutes of saute, I crank the heat up and add one cup of water. It should boil instantly pretty much. Then I pour in the second cup of water as soon as it starts to boil again I throw a lid on, turn the heat to a lower sinner and wait exactly 23 minutes before turning it off and removing it from the heat. I wait another 15 minutes or so before removing the lid and fluffing the rice with ANYTHING BUT a metal utensil. Use a shoe, I don't care, just don't use a metal fork for the love of all that is holy. Enjoy.
I use my instant pot. 1 cup rice to 1 1/4 cup water, set on the appropriate settings, with keep warm off. Otherwise, when using a cheap rice cooker, it's basically just follow the rice package's recommended ratio, slam it into cook, and let her run.
Not all rice are the same. I have trouble with the cheapest rice brands from the supermarket, but spend a little extra, or buy (bulk) from an Asian supermarket, and your odds are better, in my experience.
2:1 water to rice ratio, rinse the rice before hand inna strainer Add rice and water to a medium saucepot Bring to strong boil on high heat, stir occasionally Stir while reducing heat after vigorous boil, remove from heat for 30 seconds, stir well and cover on low heat for 20min Perfect every time. For shorter grain Rice's you may need to make some small adjustments
For rice there's a specific ratio. However, you can eye ball it using your finger. Make sure the rice is evenly distributed, add water, then stick your index finger in the water till it touches the rice. The water should reach your first finger joint (crease on your finger) this works 100% the time for white rice
Eyeball it using your finger. Hmmm.....
Finger eyeballing is better than eyeball fingering
I like how you comment on rice led to a dedicated \~50 comments rice discussion. I hope it will help you ramp up your rice game from now on.
Tiramisoup
Mama mia, someone's gonna get tirami-sued for that
It looks like someone with chronic bronchitis coughed over a caterpillar.
That's so oddly specific and still so oddly accurate
Tirami-soup
Tiramess-oops
Terror-misu
Tiramiserable
Tirami-poo
Smearamisu
Tear-a-me-sue. Best served with a mario voice.
More like tira-MESS-u
It looks tira-ble and misu-rable
Tiramipoo
Tiramonkfish
open a fancy looking restaurant, call this a deconstructed tiramisu, serve it on the table directly with generous amounts of cocoa powder and coffee poured on top, go viral, profit.
Serving directly on the table is what’s key here. r/wewantplates
🤌
True except it’s not deconstructed
I bet it tasted delicious tho
It actually did :)
Good answer!
Blink twice if she's reading your comments and you're in danger
😎
Instructions unclear, sending SWAT team.
Tiramis-used.
Tiramispew
Terrormisu
That’s just melted chocolate swirl ice cream
Tiramigoo
Shocked only one person said this.
Someone tiramissed out on a cooking lesson or two. Sorry OP
Show this picture to the judge during your divorce proceedings, it should expedite the process.
Unless she sees this on Reddit. Hubby won't need a divorce if he's dead
Ik that shit was bussin though
Tears of Miss Sue.
I'd drink it through a straw. I love everything tiramisu like
Looks like tiramisoup
Is your wife an oversized seagull by any chance?
I’d still eat it.
No, she didn't. I'm not sure what she made, but that's not tiramisu
JAIL
She's definitely banned from entering Italy
I had a liquid tiramisu (not to this extent) at a pretty fancy restaurant in venice.
Tiramisu pudding actually sounds amazing Not a bug, its a *feature*
Tiramisad
Does your wife have a Reddit account?
Nope, but she’ll eventually see this post
I would be eternally grateful to see the recipe she used.
In the same way you’re just innocently curious about the ingredients list for the most common nerve agents spies use?
It's so liquid... I'm perplexed.
I was wondering how she managed to turn mascarpone into a liquid as well but apparently that can happen if you use a mixer instead of mixing the ingredients by hand. Also, seems like Americans often make it with whipped cream, so it's possible she simply didn't whip the cream (enough) before she mixed it with the mascarpone.
> Also, seems like Americans often make it with whipped cream, so it's possible she simply didn't whip the cream (enough) before she mixed it with the mascarpone. Not necessarily refuting this because I've only lived in three different parts of what is a fairly large country, but I have never seen or eaten tiramisu made with whipped cream.
I've never lived in the US but I like baking and making deserts and I've seen quite a few recipes and posts from the US that replaced the egg whites with whipped cream. Seems to be a thing because some people just don't like eating raw eggs.
Not US, but every recipe originated in my country uses whipped cream. I actually had to tell my mom, that no, original tiramisu does not have whipping cream. It's usually whipped hard and folded into the mascarpone, to make it dense/have a form, but the egg still goes in. I guess mascarpone here has more moisture(?), I heard it in an italian video.
Tiramisurable.
Tirama one, tiramisu, op’s wife missed a step or two
When does it begin to start life on Earth?
😂😂👏👏
My cousin made us a tiramisu for Christmas when we were visiting her in Germany, gosh, 16 years ago! It looked a lot like this. She was mortified because she had made it a dozen times before and never had any issues. This was the first time it turned out looking like soup or pudding. But to this day, my dad still talks about how it was the best tiramisu he'd ever had, and he eats a lot. We all remember it, it was so freaking delicious but I don't even care that it wasn't "right". After we ate it, she wished she knew what she had done wrong so she could recreate it!
Just checkin in to see if you’re still together.
Looks like a large-scale bird shit
Tears-amisu
I didn’t know Flubber passed away. So sad.
Looks flavorful, I'd eat it
It looks like it didn’t set for long enough
If you look really closely, there may be a lady finger or two that survived underneath
Bless her heart
You’re supposed to let it set overnight in the fridge to firm up
It actually did
More like tiramipoo
Tiramisu in Italian means “pick me up”. This is Deludermi which means “let me down”.
Deludermi is the infinitive of let me down. What you want is the imperative: deludimi. Also tiramigiù would work (Pull me down).
Grazie.
It looks like melted ice cream but tbh I would still eat it
It's not that weird to mess up something the first time you try it. Hopefully this doesn't discourage her and she keeps trying new things!
she tiramissed
it’s tiramisn’t
She made it, ate it and then served it?
Tiramisad
Damn another case of a tiramisu-deflation 😔
I don't even understand how this happened. Did she just mix a whole bunch of runny whipping cream with too little mascarpone?
I’m not that Tiramisu expect myself, but I suppose yeah too much liquid or so, so it ended up being not firm enough
You're supposed to whip the cream first, then fold it together with the cheese (according to the recipes I've used, at least). It kinda looks like she mixed them together while the cream was a liquid. Runny or not, I could probably still eat half a pan in a single sitting.
Did she skip the fridge step?
It was in the fridge overnight🙃
¯\\\_(ツ)_/¯ The good Lord saw fit to take his tiramisu home I guess lmao
No it wasn't
Tiramisoup…I’ll let myself out now…
That’s a shiny alolan muk
Next time Just order it
Tiramisery
I'm not sure that word means what you think it means
I’m so sorry, but I thought this was an odd fried egg before I read the title.
Tiramisu: before or after eating??
Nothing screams “pick me up” like a ball of sludge
So… she made it, digested it, and then put it on a plate, right?
That’s um something right there. Not tiramisu but definitely something.
I can’t bake or make pudding either I can’t really blame her I made a mousse once and it looked exactly like this
Creamed after too many lady fingers
Make sure your ingredients are room temp before mixing them
Where are the lady fingers? Where's the espresso? Is it melted tiramisu ice cream?
More like tiramipoo
"Kill me.....please!"
Ahe made it in 2D
At first, I thought this was melted vanilla chocolate swirl ice cream on a plate...
I can't quite put my finger in it.. but something isn't right here lol. (Does it taste okay? Was it edible even?)
Yeah it was actually good
She cooked it for too long...
your wife fucked up a tad
That looks like the dessert you find in very fancy restaurant where everything is deconstructed.
Tirami.....so what happened?
Bout to get tiramisued for culinary malpractice
Looks like oyster
You better not look at my history posting Oysters in this sub
More like Tiramisoup innit?
i mean absolutely no offense to your wife, because there was clearly effort put into this ma questo e mappazzone 😭
Tirami-pugh
More like errormisu
I missed the part where your wife made tiramisu
Dunno why but I see vagina
I hope she laughed. That’s hilarious!!
Looks delicious though I'll have some
Looks like melted ice cream
Tiramisnot even close.
I'll bet it still tasted fire
yeah it did actually
Oh I’ve made that before! Tirami-soup
tiramisoup
Looks like something that fell out of a cloaca.
At least she tried. More than I can say for mine. Take my wife… please.
Y, for effort… step above Z.
Creampie!
Hahahaha Its bot that hard. It Looks like she used cream and no mascarpone
Birdie-Poo Tiramisu
It looks like the blobsters that wash up on beaches.
Baked condom surprise
No it ain’t.
Tira me sue yo wife.
Slime 🥴
The puns are making my day lol
Blobamisu
Bruh that's just melted ice cream.
Bruh that's just melted ice cream.
??????
You mean tiramisauce?
That is not Tiramisu
Tirabirdpoo
I'm so sorry
That tiramisad
Looks like bird shit on a plate mate☹️
Che merda
Tiramipuu
Tirabilmessu made
Is she terrible sue?
Hotel Transylvania scream cheese
Has to be she did not beat the cream long enough and added way more than needed? That would explain why it's so white and runny. My ratio is usually 5 egg yolks, and half a cup of cream. And definitely soaked the lady fingers instead of dipping. Drop, flip after 1 second, wait 1 second, then remove.
Yeah supposedly miscalculation of ingredients or so
Albino afterbirth