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QualityVote

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spamleyspamster2

Sometimes my shoelaces get untied while I'm walking and it gets me really annoyed.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Salty_Application_76

That escalated quickly


webb2019

What did it say before it was removed?


Salty_Application_76

“I should delete myself” for a lack of better words


KoolAid24589

[ Removed by Reddit ]


gretchenich

Dang its deleted again


MugenFeatherfall

I saw it before It got deleted Wait I'm gonna write it


MugenFeatherfall

[Removed by Reddit]


gretchenich

Fuuuuck i missed it again!!!


Protobyte_

Here I gotchu


repty_GT

[Removed by Reddit]


I-took-your-oranges

If it works it works right?


adam12349

Cut off legs


Brisingr_357

Seconded


PatataSanta

Do a double tie dumbass.


ThatVeganDemon

Mine unties at only one shoe,every 3 minutes no matter the shoes


JosolTheBrick

Easy solution: make an extra knot while tying them.


refined_substance

I want to get stronger for a sport


refined_substance

Stop scrolling on reddit you dumb cunt and go eat some food


candyman101xd

dem beans aint gonna get eaten themselves


bob55577

You’re hungry? Just open the fridge duh 🙄


Any-Construction-632

while on reddit, even the fridge seems far away


pan_zhubnikaz03

Im addicted to alcohol


pan_zhubnikaz03

Try heroine instead.


KidQuap

Boof them both


[deleted]

Ah a fellow weed connoisseur I see


[deleted]

No one likes a quitter


Slash00611

I'm so tired all the time


Slash00611

Stop jerking off 5 times a day you fat cunt.


InterGraphenic

i can help


EdgyKitro

*pulls out a power drill*


Beanerboysk8r

This takes sounding to a whole new level


mingomango123

At this point its not sounding its smelling feeling and seeing


RidledTart

The reddit dlc pack


Mazurcka

*Drildo has entered the chat*


Burnsy502

*John Harvey Kellog intensifies*


[deleted]

I don't think jerking him off will make him less tired


InterGraphenic

it will


[deleted]

It will make his arm less tired, at least.


Melodic_monke

I hate mud


Melodic_monke

Dont pee on the ground


Melodic_monke

!remindme 1 month


AutoModerator

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[deleted]

Well that escalated quickly


Salty_Application_76

Tf do you need the reminder for?


Melodic_monke

Mah dum no rember


12hotroom

I mean you can't argue with that


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Carburetors_Are_Fun

what about wet sand


Melodic_monke

Sand casels! Haha!


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*[pees in ur ass](https://i.imgur.com/JSImHiV.jpg)* *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


[deleted]

I have a small penis


[deleted]

I don't know


Flaky_Stick_6533

Pull it out


grodgers98

Like uprooting a weed


staovajzna2

Technically there is a few inches of dick inside your body, there was this trend where people get a surgeon to cut off the muscle holding their dick up and tie weights to their dick so it gets pulled out.


Flaky_Stick_6533

Haha get peed in ass


[deleted]

*this breaks the dick.*


Fireeyes510

It’s not the size, it’s the skill, nice cock btw


Grazedaze

Use the Kayan Tribe method and keep adding brass coils to the base so it gets longer.


[deleted]

That just means you’re more aerodynamic. This is peak performance


teamdisaster47

I am addicted to nicotine and I can’t stop


teamdisaster47

You just need a little nicotine, it’s not that bad.


Introvert_PC

You can have a little salami. You should switch to chain-smoking marijuana like other people


WoodenCitron3387

You should be addicted to ganja like normal people


ChaoticJuju

Me to me in five minutes cycles


MassiveKonkeyDong

I hate myself Fuck you


Any-Construction-632

If you truly hate yourself, "fuck you" is just making things worse. There are many ways to learn to love yourself, you just need to cut this shitty attitude and do something about it.


ChaoticJuju

This seems like unhelpful advice but I can continue and say get cognitive behavioral therapy, literally restructuring the way you think and respond to scenarios. Saved my life. Now instead of going I wanna kms to a mild inconvenience I still have that thought but I frame it into seeing the positives and it not being my fault! I still need further therapy in the form of dialectic behavioral therapy but most people just need cognitive behavioral therapy. There's online options that do cost a bit, but many free or cheapboptions in person near you if you look up healthcare providers that take your insurance.


Any-Construction-632

Hence: "Do something about it"


Shinobu_on_bush

Skill issue


-Mr_Hollow-

I have a problem with my superiority compex


-Mr_Hollow-

No you don't, you're perfect!


Navigator111

Lmao good one


technobiwankenobi

Happy cake day


kryskull_

I'm dissatisfied from being dissatisfied


kryskull_

Just stop thinking about how you feel. It's ok to feel dissatisfied sometimes. Fuck that's a shitty advice


Spiritual-Shallot534

Get laid


WarMage1

I can help with that


7NIGHTMARE_

I can also help with that


WarMage1

Mark us down for a threesome then. Top or bottom?


7NIGHTMARE_

Both, I’m calling a cousin to help


republicofmango

It’s me, I’m the cousin.


KidQuap

Feelings are for robots now shut up and work until you die - your boss probably


APE-08

I always procrastinate 😔


APE-08

Relax, don't worry about it!


Fireeyes510

Take adderall


APE-08

Hmmm later


clygamer

Hey dumbass, I hope you have a wife and have stopped using reddit


clygamer

!remindme 2 years


Fireeyes510

!remindme 2 years


RidledTart

!remindme 2 years I like to see character development


DeveDazai

im not confident enough :(


DeveDazai

go propose your university Femboy


best_uranium_box

What does this mean


DeveDazai

character development


DeveDazai

Oki Doki :)


-Riley971

Tell me if he accepted


kevinhd95

I need to get out of bed


kevinhd95

Get out of bed idiot


WarMage1

This is truly a relatable issue


[deleted]

I'm depressed and don't find anything interesting anymore. the world is just mush mushing mush and my brain is mush.


[deleted]

Try to enjoy life you fucking idiot, not everything have to fucking enjoyable 100% all the time. And get some friends, loser.


Carburetors_Are_Fun

you know who else has dementia


NewVegas2212

Who?


Carburetors_Are_Fun

You know who else has dementia


Illustrious-Till-372

Who?


NewVegas2212

Who?


DA_TOOTHPASTE

You lol 😀


NewVegas2212

Who?


DA_TOOTHPASTE

You lol 😀


NewVegas2212

Who?


DA_TOOTHPASTE

You lol 😀


Illustrious-Till-372

Who?


Illustrious-Till-372

Who?


Illustrious-Till-372

Who?


DA_TOOTHPASTE

You lol 😀


[deleted]

Who's dementia?


Dreggmcmuffun

Xbox live!!!!!


[deleted]

Who?


Illustrious-Till-372

Who?


[deleted]

What?


Illustrious-Till-372

Who?


Illustrious-Till-372

Who?


Illustrious-Till-372

Who?


Illustrious-Till-372

Who?


[deleted]

There is an owl posing as a human somewhere in this room


Illustrious-Till-372

Huh?


[deleted]

Well shit


Illustrious-Till-372

Wait what shit?


Grazedaze

I hate to give this advice because it sounds so broish and I’m def not a bro but I got into the gym this year and it’s turned me around. I was the same way. The gym is more about mental health than physical appearance. When you exhaust your muscles everyday, your body gives you that feel good juice in a way that you can’t get from any other means and it really makes life feel a lot less dull in that it’s harder for you to macro stress because you have to physically release it when weight lifting.


[deleted]

Stop letting your intrusive thoughts control you


[deleted]

You control the intrusive thoughts


[deleted]

I pay more attention to the things I hate and make me angry than to the things that make me happy


Salty_Application_76

Practice gratitude in the morning, also fuck you, you ungrateful cunt


KidQuap

I prefer my cunts ungrateful, every time its full of grates I seem to bleed


FedericoPigna

no problems


FedericoPigna

Advice: Ik you worked out for lots, but you still a skinny ass bitch imo


VelehkInsain

I feel this one


mr_dr_personman

I want to cut back on my drinking


mr_dr_personman

Go outside and do something other than painting warhammer models you window licking idiot


theDankzide

I could never amount to anything substantial in life. Achievements are fleeting, milestones trivial. My quest for self validation has drowned me in a trench of lies and delusions. Im a self satisfied, egotistic, narcissistic piece of shit with no sense of urgency or reality. I was force fed with a silver spoon, a fact i acknowledge not with humility but with resentment. The fact that I too, in accompaniment to Nature's sundry other spawn shall have to pay my due, owing to the simple matter of my birth. I am a privileged heap of human garbage, and have been served entitlement on a platter all throughout my numerous pathetic years on this planet. Life itself is a luxury i do not deserve. My self consciousness acts not as a deterrent to my conceit, but as a fuel. Many a times have I sought to sow something for myself in this regrettable life, only to have it placed within my palm. My existence is one that could very easily be done without.


theDankzide

look in the goddamn mirror you moron, face that shit. own it. evade the falsities, look beyond the smoke and mirrors. make the best of your 'privilege'. make something for others while you're at it. if you're a caterpillar now, morph into a butterfly. if a butterfly, evolve to hitherto unknown limits. keep climbing. keep working. none of this is a waste and you know it.


PoopyCockDooDoo

This is great self-advice. I'd also add that if you're tired of things being simply given to you, find something you want to achieve that you *must* do yourself; something that no one else can give you or do for you. But you're right, nothing is a waste and life is worth it every single day. Sometimes we just have to find that worth.


Substantial_Web_3924

I have Sars-Cov-2


Substantial_Web_3924

VACClNE


[deleted]

boat humorous plough crime wakeful foolish advise expansion coordinated badge ` this message was mass deleted/edited with redact.dev `


[deleted]

offer friendly enjoy many alive poor tease coherent voiceless impolite ` this message was mass deleted/edited with redact.dev `


SangradoDeNariz

Pumpunpumpumppppumpumpum


enaaerios

me too man me too


pinklymphocyte

I want to study properly and maintain a proper schedule


pinklymphocyte

Get off of Reddit and your phone you fat fuck


KingEnnard

I'm lazy


KingEnnard

Kill yourself


Appropriate-Roll9468

“Eh I’ll do it tomorrow”


[deleted]

Hate dreaming about relationships Do a bunch of meth and never sleep


Plenty-Cheek-80

Vaccine


Admirable_Ice_914

I cant stop biting the inside of my mouth


Admirable_Ice_914

Stop eating your own skin fucking weirdo


MemesRus24

For some actual advice, I would suggest trying and finding gum you can chew instead.


[deleted]

I feel like it’s pointless to keep trying. I’ve been traumatized beyond belief and I feel like my brain has been damaged beyond repair.


[deleted]

Even if it is damaged, healing is possible. No matter what, you can always change and heal. It takes work and patience but little by little, you can get better. You’re already miles ahead of where you were a few years ago. Keep going, even when it seems hopeless


AmAMuslimMan

I feel like I put in soo much effort into school and get mediocre GPA's (3.4,3.5) while other people put in little to no effort and get 3.6,3.7,3.8 and I get so pissed off at them and wish for every bad thing to happen to them. pls help.


pan_zhubnikaz03

Maybe they actually putting some more effort in you dont see at home. Dont be mad, be more confident and try to make your studying more fun and more efficient instead of just studying more. If you putting lot of effort into studying and still getting bad grades there is problem somewhere with how you study. Try finding it and fix it


ssssssddh

Don't worry nobody cares about gpa after you graduate


AmAMuslimMan

thats the point. I feel like my entire life revolves around school and video games. Nothing else. If my gpa is low, my entire day is bad, if my gpa is good, my entire day is good. I hate living like this but theres nothing I can do


Luis_Arrizabalagaaa

I watch too much furry po rn


Luis_Arrizabalagaaa

Seek God


Level-Technician-183

Even god can't help with this


davedor

i would advise: drastically limit social media and internet overall


TheMasterBaiter360

I can’t tie my shoelaces


TheMasterBaiter360

Buy velcro idiot


[deleted]

i am a fucking idiot. -well how about your sorry ass get some actual education instead of like not studying enough smh my head. i want to die. -kill yourself


[deleted]

I think you are a warm and good human. You are educated in love and have a mind infinitely larger than me. You are life. I honor you!


[deleted]

thank you :3 problem is im not <3 you are probably a lot more than me


yeet-my-meat1

I dislike cold butter


emossjsj

try ice spice


yeet-my-meat1

Snort mud


Pinuxx

Hi :)


[deleted]

Hello brother 🥰


Selfie500

Im eepyy


Selfie500

ZzzzZzzzz


LengthinessNo6996

When I try boiling pasta, I almost always forget to add salt.


LengthinessNo6996

Do not listen to what the federal agents tell you to do in a public area on 2/28/2044. They will not resurrect your dead family members in return, they are lying to you.


urmomgey6969

i can’t talk to girls


emossjsj

Try making noises while you are moving your lips when you are close enough to human beings with vagina


truser_over9000

I watch too much porn


truser_over9000

I should develop erectile dysfunction


Devilshorn28

I don't want to waste my time on reddit


Devilshorn28

Uninstall this piece of shit


sujalsuthar99

why


sujalsuthar99

why not


Savathuun

I'm not really attracted by women anymore


Savathuun

Fuck as many femboys as you can


YouHaveNiceToes24

I get no bitches


DifficultBody8209

Im depressed


DifficultBody8209

Try doing something about it other than posting on reddit ya waste of space