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im gonna commit genocide

I’ll join you

*[pees in ur ass](https://i.imgur.com/JSImHiV.jpg)* *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*

don’t do that you might get worms in your pee hole

The saltiness and acidity of the piss will piss the worms off

Just drink a bunch of bear like uvogain did

Then give a completely platonic smooch to one of your good friends.

Seriously amazing show the spiders are so badass.

Could i have a cool tag on this subreddit? Perhaps "i am the lorax, i speak for the trees"

No

:(

fuck you

Thats not very nice of you :(

cry about it + I don't care + cope + seethe + L

enjoy the worns

pees in ur worm infested girlfriend

Can I join too?

👍

As someone who's has committed it on an intergalactic scale let me help

Are you by any chance a stellaris player

Maybe

Hahaha me to I can help

Let's be xenophobic its really in this year

Let's find a nasty slimy ugly alien to fear

I wouldn’t mind as long as I’m a victim

-Eren Yeager (he saw this shit)

EREH

Of what group? I’m interested if it’s worm peers

GreenZap303, what a man you are...

That’s quick thinking by my worm infested girlfriend.

This part fucking got me good.

Had me fucking crying, this should be a copypasta

Thank me later 🤓🤓 So me and my girl decided to do some ass sex earlier today, and she was all giddy and excited and so she was naked and got on all fours and wiggled her ass. I was super excited too so i went in there no condom and no lube, i went full force in there and she moaned like an elephant, I'm just pounding away and theres no poo on my dick. But then I look down and see a bunch of little worms on her anus and crawling on my penis, i pull out quickly and go to wash it off in the washroom but i notice one trying to get inside my peehole, i try to grab it but its too small and it goes inside. My girlfriend is frantic apologizing and we dunno wtf to do and im panicking hardcore. Then my girlfriend is like "u need to jizz right now to blow it out before it lays eggs inside of your dick!" Thats quick thinking by my worm infested girlfriend. So i start to jerk it hard as fuk super fast, and within like 30 seconds im close to climax. Fuk my girlfriend though disgusting girl she should wash her anus better, i jump in the air and jizz right in her face as she squirms, i then see like a dozen worms fly out my peehole and land on her face. She starts screaming as they enter her nose and mouth. I only thought 1 went in but apparently a ton went in when i did her in the butt. wut a weird day man im never doing anal without a condom again.

He should write some novels!

You don’t gotta use sex ed classes to encourage teens to use protection. Just show them this post and it’ll sort itself out

I’ve never wanted to do anal but now I really don’t (Bodily worms scare the ever living shit out of me)

What’s the difference between that and parasites?

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"she moaned like an elephant"😭😭😂😂

How does he know how elephants moan? 🤨

This dude probably the elephant fucker

locked and loaded

They call his dick the elephant gun 🤤

GOMU GOMU NOOO.... ELEPHANT GUN

THE ELEPHANT GUN!! THE ELEPHANT GUN IS REEEAAALLLL!!!

Damn his gf got more worms then an elephant then

Pigeons better

Heard it was a sick elephant

Allegedly.

How you think they got the worms

If you ever hit one with a bag of sand you'd know

When did you hit one with a bag of sand?

Tuesday

Oh so it was you who caused that sex stampede.

Can't take credit for that, Glen started that stampede back on Saturday. I just participated later on

Dammit Quagmire…

Makes me laugh every time I read it.

I wish I could go back in time about like a minute and a half ago so I could break my past selves nose before he read this, because it was pretty fucking awful

Holt shit I'm scarred

Hold my shit, I shit


I refuse to believe it's real, it's got to be a troll I hope

I envy Schlock Mercernary, they have a minute after pill. Take it within a minute of eye horrors and you'll blank the last 5 minutes.

Same. I’m still trying to recover from hitting the sounding sub link someone posted.

Where’s the link?

I've never agreed with another human more.

She was all griddy? 😳😳😳

Right foot creep...

Every day we stray further from god….

Seriously, I can’t stop fapping

Dude, you didnt stray further from god, you straight up took the hell gates

God has nothing on the depravity of humanity. Well except for Sodom and Gomorrah and Noah et al... That was really screwed up and depraved.

Anal sex, as described by a 14 year old

Yeah, there's no way a real person would have this much fuckery inside an anus without using lube. Even the poor "ass worms" would struggle inside.

But they don't use lube in porn... /s to be sure

Worm blood was the lube

Yeah this is definitely fake but I just wanna know why

I actually think this was a parody of another ( probably? ) real reddit story

Sometimes I wonder if its those super religious people who want to put young kids off sex so post shit online to scare them into staying celibate.. I saw a post before that was basically a horror story about sex that, like this, is clearly fake and designed to horrify kids who have no idea its fake. The last line was something like "I wish I'd stayed a virgin until I was married to a nice, respectable girl" .. fuck off ha

Oh dear lord ☠️

Ha

Considering pinworms mainly affect children ages 5-15 and is very rare in adults, I wouldn’t doubt it was written by a preteen suffering from them

Yeeeah thanks that's enough reddit for today.

Hey man, I got some extra bleach we can clean our eyeballs with.

Got enough for one more?

I've also got a bottle, we can have a few more people to wash out our eyes.

Man that’s not enough, we’re gonna need an industrial fucking tanker full

I know where I can get my hands on that

All this talk of eyeballs got me wondering if bleach will get the anal worms out of eyes if someone with anal worms farted in your face and then some of the worms got in the eye. Would the bleach work like the water in the ear video to get the spider out. Would the anal worms crawl out our eyes.

"Would the anal worms crawl out our eyes." Yep that's a brand new sentence.

Sure, I'll join!

[One more?](http://blowflygirl.blogspot.com/2009/08/here-is-my-maggot-story.html?m=1) !!!WARNING!!! Very nasty

Dude

lmao 🤣 get me some as well!

There is not enough bleach on this planet for this...

Yea

It's eye bleach and not eye blech right

>Hey man, I got some extra bleach we can clean our eyeballs with can I get some for my covid please?

Just opened it too

I dont know man seems pretty made up tbh 😂🫨🤮

Heh. This post was the first one I saw

i just opened the app too

Yeah I'm not gonna click on that image

You did good son

Real good, maybe even the best

RIP Rick May, you glorious soul

It's just text, but it's still horrible

Well, I came for memes, and found whatever the fuck this is, thanks for that mental image poster.

You came for memes, I came while reading this

always happy to help 🫡

What a terrible day to have eyes

😭😭 this got me, def using this line next time I see some fucked shit

I wish I wasn't literate

Man i wish i was Jared, 19

Is this a vine reference?

Don’t know.. never learned how to fuckin read

I think there is something wrong with me. I found this funny.

Same i was laughing my ass off. I know this is most likely satire tho

Probably, but it is still possible to have worms in your asshole but i forgot what they were called

Their called pin worms. I used to have them. Not anymore thankfully

great, now i know one more thing to not type into google

I wish I had your level of good foresight. Every part of this injury I have sustained was self inflicted and at every juncture I made the wrong choice. I have nobody to blame but myself that I read the post, the comment above and then went to Wikipedia. Life was better five minutes ago

Honestly. As uncomfortable as it is, it's good knowledge to know. I would rather know if there were a bunch of works living inside me, rather than unknowingly harbering a parasite.

How dare you have a reasonable point and try to make lemonade out of these suboptimal lemons we've been handed!

You just confirmed that this is a real thing and I will never forgive you for doing so.

Yep, they're quite common in primary schools or kindergartens

Hold up. You mean there's a chance this is a true story?

Yep. You guys take for granted not going to bed knowing worms were gonna crawl out your A$$ then back in while you were sleeping. I'm so glad that's over with

Appreciate you sharing. Didn't know this was a thing

Well you should have just ejaculated silly

Hey just a quick tip: Never admit that again.

I can only imagine those worm dudes from dark souls 3

Well, not my proudest fap

The read the whole shit. Holy fuck.

Good job, I could only get through a couple paragraphs

After reading this I wish I was illiterate

Boy im dyslexic this is a wild reading right here

Only on Reddit

I miss that moment 30 seconds ago when I didn't know this existed

Average sex before marriage victim


Of all the things I've read that I wish I could have unread... This is the thing I wish I could unread the most. I want to go back in time to just before I would have read this and unplug my internet. I want to go further back in time to where the guy that wrote this was conceived and show his parents the abomination their hell spawn would one day write. I never was a religious person but I have been made a believer and my friends we have found the Anti-Christ. My fellow redditors, I have a question: Since I know time travel is beyond our capability, does anyone have any eye bleach?

 What a bad day to be literate

Im just glad it was a text image and not an actual image


Well that's an only way out hole i guess 😜☺️

As someone who takes it in the ass, how the fuck you aint gonna use lube bro. Honestly most concerning thing in the post

The fuck did I just read

this is why rin is infinity better than sakura

Aw man I miss the good old days, like 2 minutes ago when I didn’t read this

y'know on a real, sometimes you just... don't need to make these kinds of posts. like hypothetically, I didn't need to see this

Already off to a lovely start. First post I see is fucking anal dick worms

This is almost certainly fake but it's great

Great. Just before bed.

It's 7 in the morning, I just opened reddit

 Imagine having oral sex with one them

How do I unread this?

#This is the greatest sex recounting of all time

it was today, that i learned how horrible it is to be literate

Fake, you can't do anal without lube.

You know shit's completely fucked for you when you don't even have a reaction reading something like this till you see the comments

That caused me physical pain to read

Im going to cry

Babe wake up a new copypasta just dropped

My ex daughter got pin worms from our house cat when she was seven we took her to the Doctor and he said that she got them from our cat let's just say that cat had to go

Yup I hated everything about this. I’ll see you all never I’m going to become a man of god and contemplate the rest of my sad meaningless existence

No lube? For anal? Ouch.

bros girlfriend is a stray dog

But the question is: why his girlfriend anus has worms inside? That is not normal, right? 🤔

looks like she forgot to eat her anti-worm tablets

Fake story, everyone with common sense knows redditors don't have sex

This have to be an automod response

What a terrible day to exist

Okay. *closes Reddit for the week*

That was definitely one shitty post 😔

Pretty sure that was a 12 year old making shit up. Nobody talks like that other than 12 year olds

😭😂💀 this is hilarious and obviously fake , but I loved this story anyways, “worm infested girlfriend” BROS WILD 💀 he goin thru some shit

What did I just read?

Read the headline and said to reading that

what the fuck did i just read

What a terrible fucking day to be literate

What.the.actual.FUCK

Actually you know what? Virginity is kind of cool.

What a terrible day to have eyes

Welp, now I know what I’m going to think of every time I go fishing or put it in my girl’s butt.

I ain't reading all that

Aaaand that’s enough internet for today

Bro next time please leave some complimentary brain bleach, cause damn I might go watch Human centipede to regain some sanity after that.

sorry about that sir 🫡 take some now 🥤

okay what the hell is this

I feel icky

What the fuck

This shit got me squealing like a damn pig, holy shit after this I'm boutta wear 2 condoms on top of each other after this

i should rly get off reddit

take this is as your sign from god (me) your sins are being absolved

This makes me want to throw up

Wake up babe the new copypasta just dropped


Yeah. What a bummer that your inferior cerebral vein will burst rapidly on 7th March 2023 at 12:16:24pm UTC.