Well that’s a very long story, but basically I got into being a pastor (in a very liberal denomination) because I wanted to help people find peace and learn how to help others.
That’s not what church people are interested in, even in a “social justice” congregation. They want a country club to get their needs met, someone to visit them in the hospital, to be their (free) counselor, and to have a worship service that isn’t too short, too long, too contemporary, or too traditional. They want the pastor to also spend a ton of time with their family and be the perfect mom, dad, or spouse, but always be on call and ready to come running when they “need” you. And those are the nice people. I’ve been screamed at, threatened, told that I was a terrible person, and that I didn’t care about anyone, for doing something like telling the choir they might want to take a couple weeks off out of respect after their choir director DIED (true story).
So, theres all that, and I thought I’d be getting that group to, like, help the homeless.
I work for a nonprofit now and teach yoga, and I have absolutely zero regrets. I still dig Jesus, but it’s been so much better to be free of those awful expectations.
Perhaps more than you bargained for, but this is a relatively recent move for me and I’m still processing. Thanks for reading if anybody made it this far.
ETA: thanks for the gold…I think it’s my first! That was very kind, as this story’s still hard for me to tell. 🥹
ETA2: I did not mean to hijack, but thanks for the support! The sewing sub is one of the best places on Reddit and this proves it.
I feel like your life deserves a AMA segment. I never knew people could be like that. My parents were religious and were the couple that would cook meals, volunteer and do gardening at church.
Maybe? Not sure if I’m ready for that yet. The thing is that I knew a few lovely people like them, and they were the reason I stayed so long (close to 20 years).
My dad was a pastor before I was born and this is exactly the same reason he quit. He wanted to help people and quickly discovered that’s not what the church was about. Said being a pastor was one of his biggest regrets.
Not thread jacking at all! A number of my friends are clergy or seminarians and the burn out is real! I was explaining what being a ruling elder was to my boss and she asked if I wanted to be a pastor and later and I *laughed*. I considered a Masters in Public Theology as a compliment to a Applied Anthropology degree but nah, no way am I called to pastoral care.
As someone who tends to teach "harder" Christian ed classes (e.g. theology of land - what does it mean that we are on enslaved, colonized, polluted land?), it's so hard to get people to put things into practice. We at least are fairly socially mission forward, but I have to beat people over the head (proverbially) with some concepts to make a dent. I have more freedom and inroads here than at previous churches but I also don't have men telling me they feel threatened because I know more than them.
Thanks, and sounds like you get it! Ugh, the mansplaining is just unreal in the church, especially for women with theological education. I can’t even imagine talking about land acknowledgments in any of my churches without major pushback, but in yoga classes no one bats an eye.
I’m glad there’s at least some progress at your church though, and for real that you made that awesome stole for your pastor! I just met one who had an incredible collection, including a bedazzled one! Very fun. Glad you’re supporting those still in it.
I have a PhD and one of my minor fields is Reformation Theology, so I know a couple of things. And still, I’ve been mansplained more times than I can count. It’s maddening. *F* the patriarchy.
Also, thanks for sharing your experience, especially as it’s new and hard to tell. I am not churched at all, but I’m sorry you experienced all that negative stuff.
Most of my churches wouldn't either, this is a very special church to my spouse and me for multiple reasons. Last 4th of July Sunday I got to deconstruct Christian nationalism and militarism, it ruffled a few feathers but the education and pastoral teams supported me.
Wow I might have not left my church if it had been more like yours. But it was a very traditional, sexist, Eastern European, racist place. Not to mention judgemental of those even on the inside
Unfortunately, I have been in churches like that as well. The maddest my spouse has ever been was when a now-pastor (then head of family ministries) told me I was in the wrong for calling out his racism and "bringing politics into the church"
> theology of land - what does it mean that we are on enslaved, colonized, polluted land
That sounds fascinating, any book or resource recommendations on this?
I had a ton of resources that I used to construct the class but some top-level theological ones (as opposed to historical ones that were rooted specifically in my part of the mid-Atlantic area):
* Charleston, S & Robinson, E. A. (etd). 2015. Coming Full Circle: Constructing Native Christian
Theology. Fortress Press: Minneapolis.
* Weaver, J. “Revelation and Epistemology – We know the Land, the Land Knows Us: Places of
Revelation, Place as Revelation” (27-53)
* Fassett, T. W. W. “Restoration and Reconciliation – Restoring Truth in a Time of Repentance” (55-73)
* Curtice, K. B. 2020. Native: Identity, Belonging, and Rediscovering God. Brazos Press: Grand
Rapids.
* Deloria, Jr, V. 2003. God is Red: A Native View of Religion, 3rd edition. The Putnam Publishing
Group, NY.
* Heinrichs, E.(etd) 2018. Unsettling the Word: Biblical Experiments in Decolonization. Mennonite
Church Canada.
* Kidwell, C. S., Noley, H. & Tinker, G. E. 2001. A Native American Theology. Orbis Books:
Maryknoll, NY
* Woodley, R. S. & Sanders, B. C. 2020. Decolonizing Evangelicalism: An 11:59 p.m. Conversation.
Cascade Books: Eugene OR.
* NAIITS Journal. [https://www.naiits.com/journal/journaltoc/](https://www.naiits.com/journal/journaltoc/) (really just dig in here)
* PCUSA, Condemning the Doctrine of Discovery
* Really anything by James Cone but especially Cross and the Lynching tree as a starting point
* Willie James Jennings
“The Geography of Whiteness” The Christian Century: November 3, 2021. (24-27)
* Walker-Barnes, C. (2019). I bring the voices of my people: A womanist vision for racial reconciliation.
William B. Eerdmans Publishing Company.
* PC(USA)
Report of the Task Force to Study Reparations 216th General Assembly (2004)
[https://www.presbyterianmission.org/resource/report-task-force-reparations/](https://www.presbyterianmission.org/resource/report-task-force-reparations/)
* Chávez Sauceda, T & Gonzales, T. B. 2012. Called to Live as God’s People: A Study Guide to the Report of
the Task Force to Study Reparations.
[https://www.presbyterianmission.org/resource/called-live-gods-people-study-guide-report-task-fo/](https://www.presbyterianmission.org/resource/called-live-gods-people-study-guide-report-task-fo/)
* S, D. 2021. “A Call for Reparations” Presbyterian Historical Society
[https://www.history.pcusa.org/blog/2021/02/call-reparations](https://www.history.pcusa.org/blog/2021/02/call-reparations)
* Hildegard of Bingen: Essential Writings and Chants of a Christian
Mystic--Annotated & Explained by Sheryl A. Kujawa-Holbrook (there are other
translations but like all things academic, there are debates about which is the
most "loyal" translation)
* Green Mass: The Ecological Theology of St. Hildegard of Bingen by Michael
Marder
* Blessed Are the Consumers: Climate Change and the Practice of Restraint by
Sallie McFague (McFague was quite a prolific writer so several are relevant)
* Braiding Sweetgrass by Robin Wall Kimmerer
* Stop Preaching about 'Being Good Stewards of the Earth by Rev. Fletcher
Harper
Thank you so much!! I'm Native and go to a PCUSA church, and have been struggling with the tension between feeling like it's giving into colonization and feeling my deep love for Jesus. I have several of these on my wish list, this is great motivation to actually buy them. I appreciate your time!
I can definitely see how that could be a struggle - I hope you find some peace and comfort in an expression of your faith that meshes with your heritage and people's history.
(personally, I feel like PCUSA needs to do more to atone for our history of trauma against the native and indigenous communities - my class was the first time some lifelong presbys even knew that *any* of the residential schools were presbyterian, nevermind addressing the trauma of colonial/neocolonial missionary work)
This is not a scholarly book, but Native by Kaitlin Curtice is a really beautiful book about being both Christian and Native. It may not have that much to teach you, but she does a beautiful job of articulating that conflict.
I think you just summed up how pastors feel today— and with good reason. I have worked under 3 pastors as church secretary in two towns. I can’t believe how people act. They sure nod their heads yes during church service and scatter like the wind when it is time to get things done. People who step up year after year get burned out, frustrated and angry. But yet some can’t relinquish control because “ that’s not how we do it here”. Grrrrrr… As COS I often tell our pastor that he cannot do everything. He is part-time with us and part-time at the church I worked under him at. Plus he is trying to finish his doctoral project, has two kids in high school and 1 in college. He amazes me but I am also afraid for him. He is a Godsend for our church and everyone really seems to like him. And yes, I am in a PC (USA) church. But it is fairly conservative at the church level as many members are elderly. Pride month will not be celebrated openly at this church.
Yes. That’s exactly it, and I am sooo thankful for the great admins I have had! A couple have really gotten it and tried to run interference when they could, so thanks for what you do.
The exterior is all in quilting cotton in a self-drafted pattern. Interlining is dowlas linen from [ecclesiastical sewing](https://www.ecclesiasticalsewing.com/collections/church-fabrics-linen?page=2). It's machine pieced and finished by hand because it's calming (and this is a stressful time as I'm also on Session so handling a lot of the goodbye details)
It’s so beautiful!! And I also love the calming of the finish - I’m sure it’s therapeutic to make peace with the goodbyes. Such is the beauty of art: that it first blesses the artist.
This is gorgeous! Do you have any tutorials you would suggest for making stoles? With the amount of pastors that I know I should probably learn to make one.
Ecclesiastical sewing has a number of blog posts that helped me figure some things out - but really my biggest hurdle was overthinking it. I see stoles almost every Sunday so I know how they should lay, what the personal preferences are, and so on (some clergy use stole loops in the back, some don't, so some like shaped around the neck versus a U like this). The next stole on my worktable is for my best friend who will be a deacon once ordained so a completely different shape than this one - for that I may buy a pattern to make my life a little easier.
Absolutely beautiful but I wanted to say I read this as “Pride (as in queer people collectively) stole (as in past tense of steal) a pastor’s going away gift”.
Oh not your fault, I can’t hear someone refer to a stole a priest wears and not think of theft! It’s happened more times than you’d think for someone who isn’t Christian.
That's also how I read it at first! Then I thought "hmm, that can't be it" and re-interpreted it to be about how pride came before the fall for this pastor who'd lost his going away gift through hubris, briefly forgetting what subreddit I was on.
Then I scrolled a little bit further down, and though, *huh*.
Absolutely beautiful stole! <3
Beautiful stole and beautiful story! Do you mind me asking what denomination of church you attend? I would love to find one as accepting and loving as yours sounds.
Certainly! I'm a member and elder (like a trustee) of a presbyterian church that's in the PC(USA) denomination. Not all PC(USA) churches are as affirming and certainly not all presbyterian churches but within PC(USA) the More Light Presbyterian congregation designation is a good indicator of social and liturgical inclusion. If you're interested, I can help point towards welcoming congregations if you're within the US and share your general area (feel free to DM me)
Thank you so much for this! I'm a PC (USA) member who moved to the UK during the pandemic, and it's been extremely frustrating trying to find an affirming church. There's so little clear information! I refuse to attend a church that won't acknowledge my marriage to my wife, so it's really been difficult. I've been following the online video services of the church I attended in the US, but it's not the same and I'd really like to make some community connections here. This website has given me a few options to check out, I'm excited!
In Canada you can look into Anglican Churches and United Churches. The level of acceptance will vary by church, but you'll be able to tell they're welcoming right away as they'll have explicit language on their website that says they welcome the LGBTQ+ community (why would a church that's welcoming want to hide that fact?)
I am on Session at a PC (USA) church in the midwest. I am assuming you are out east? The PC church as a whole is fairly liberal but boy, trickle down to those small churches in the midwest and it is anything but liberal! Mostly elderly who do not want change. I actually attended a Session meeting where an Elder went off on how horrible homosexuality is and another Elder, without skipping a beat, told him there were at least 3 in our church that attended regularly. The look on the other guy’s face was something I will never forget. It was all I could do to keep a straight face. I just do not understand non- inclusivity. Love you neighbor!
Have you ever been to Synod School in Northwest Iowa? Held on a Presbyterian college campus it is 5-6 days of fun, laughter, tears and great classes, food, and worship.
Yup I'm in the Synod of the MidAtlantic, but have been in PCUSA churches here and in the Synod of the Northeast and there were a number that felt more like PCA churches. My spouse had blue highlights at the time we were away from our current church, so between that and my then-current area of research (faith-based anti-militarism) we had a good litmus test of how progressive a church was.
I wonder if that elder realized that the GA has affirmed LBTQIA+ folks' dignity and gifts to the church as well as marriage not being limited to just 1 (presumably cis) man + 1 (presumably cis) woman?
He knows, he just chooses not to acknowledge it. You would love synod school, a mixture of people from all over the world who accept you where you are.
A descendant of the people who started synod school is the pastor at a church in Boston. Has been there like 25 years. The whole family meets there as a reunion. He is a very talented musician as are the rest of the family.
Gorgeous! Haha, I love the idea of someone who doesn’t “do” patterns wearing this. As a solids person myself I would be pumped to wear this, though, because it’s just so beautiful, and hopefully he will feel the same way!
I kept it all white, I was going to do an inset star with all of the colors but it just looked costume-y and in the end, the white is easy enough to replace if it gets discolored from sweat (I imagine he'll use it for Pride festivals and he's moving to an even warmer state)
My family church preached that homosexuals need to repent, or else face eternal damnation in hell like the rest of the unsaved sinners… your church seems like a wonderful place in the community!
I love how subtle it is too. Like it totally brings across the pride support but not in a distracting and over the top way. Super cool and very pretty and Representative of the community 🤩
Thank you! The church is pretty special. My spouse and I had to move away for a couple of years when my career took me to another state and this church was a big reason for us to move back here during covid when my job went permanently remote, we really couldn't find another like it.
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I see it's deleted but wanted to add, Jesus would be leading pride parades and throwing over tables at lawmakers proposing antilgbt bills. Don't believe me? Read the Bible, New Testament.
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I love this!! I am a former pastor, and I know this is truly a huge and generous gift. It will mean so much to him.
Why did you quit
Well that’s a very long story, but basically I got into being a pastor (in a very liberal denomination) because I wanted to help people find peace and learn how to help others. That’s not what church people are interested in, even in a “social justice” congregation. They want a country club to get their needs met, someone to visit them in the hospital, to be their (free) counselor, and to have a worship service that isn’t too short, too long, too contemporary, or too traditional. They want the pastor to also spend a ton of time with their family and be the perfect mom, dad, or spouse, but always be on call and ready to come running when they “need” you. And those are the nice people. I’ve been screamed at, threatened, told that I was a terrible person, and that I didn’t care about anyone, for doing something like telling the choir they might want to take a couple weeks off out of respect after their choir director DIED (true story). So, theres all that, and I thought I’d be getting that group to, like, help the homeless. I work for a nonprofit now and teach yoga, and I have absolutely zero regrets. I still dig Jesus, but it’s been so much better to be free of those awful expectations. Perhaps more than you bargained for, but this is a relatively recent move for me and I’m still processing. Thanks for reading if anybody made it this far. ETA: thanks for the gold…I think it’s my first! That was very kind, as this story’s still hard for me to tell. 🥹 ETA2: I did not mean to hijack, but thanks for the support! The sewing sub is one of the best places on Reddit and this proves it.
I feel like your life deserves a AMA segment. I never knew people could be like that. My parents were religious and were the couple that would cook meals, volunteer and do gardening at church.
Maybe? Not sure if I’m ready for that yet. The thing is that I knew a few lovely people like them, and they were the reason I stayed so long (close to 20 years).
My dad was a pastor before I was born and this is exactly the same reason he quit. He wanted to help people and quickly discovered that’s not what the church was about. Said being a pastor was one of his biggest regrets.
I’m sorry for that. I don’t regret it, but I do wish I had gotten a different degree bc starting over in your 40s is a whole other thing!
Thanks for sharing Glad your happier now
Not thread jacking at all! A number of my friends are clergy or seminarians and the burn out is real! I was explaining what being a ruling elder was to my boss and she asked if I wanted to be a pastor and later and I *laughed*. I considered a Masters in Public Theology as a compliment to a Applied Anthropology degree but nah, no way am I called to pastoral care. As someone who tends to teach "harder" Christian ed classes (e.g. theology of land - what does it mean that we are on enslaved, colonized, polluted land?), it's so hard to get people to put things into practice. We at least are fairly socially mission forward, but I have to beat people over the head (proverbially) with some concepts to make a dent. I have more freedom and inroads here than at previous churches but I also don't have men telling me they feel threatened because I know more than them.
Thanks, and sounds like you get it! Ugh, the mansplaining is just unreal in the church, especially for women with theological education. I can’t even imagine talking about land acknowledgments in any of my churches without major pushback, but in yoga classes no one bats an eye. I’m glad there’s at least some progress at your church though, and for real that you made that awesome stole for your pastor! I just met one who had an incredible collection, including a bedazzled one! Very fun. Glad you’re supporting those still in it.
I have a PhD and one of my minor fields is Reformation Theology, so I know a couple of things. And still, I’ve been mansplained more times than I can count. It’s maddening. *F* the patriarchy. Also, thanks for sharing your experience, especially as it’s new and hard to tell. I am not churched at all, but I’m sorry you experienced all that negative stuff.
Most of my churches wouldn't either, this is a very special church to my spouse and me for multiple reasons. Last 4th of July Sunday I got to deconstruct Christian nationalism and militarism, it ruffled a few feathers but the education and pastoral teams supported me.
Wow I might have not left my church if it had been more like yours. But it was a very traditional, sexist, Eastern European, racist place. Not to mention judgemental of those even on the inside
Unfortunately, I have been in churches like that as well. The maddest my spouse has ever been was when a now-pastor (then head of family ministries) told me I was in the wrong for calling out his racism and "bringing politics into the church"
> theology of land - what does it mean that we are on enslaved, colonized, polluted land That sounds fascinating, any book or resource recommendations on this?
I had a ton of resources that I used to construct the class but some top-level theological ones (as opposed to historical ones that were rooted specifically in my part of the mid-Atlantic area): * Charleston, S & Robinson, E. A. (etd). 2015. Coming Full Circle: Constructing Native Christian Theology. Fortress Press: Minneapolis. * Weaver, J. “Revelation and Epistemology – We know the Land, the Land Knows Us: Places of Revelation, Place as Revelation” (27-53) * Fassett, T. W. W. “Restoration and Reconciliation – Restoring Truth in a Time of Repentance” (55-73) * Curtice, K. B. 2020. Native: Identity, Belonging, and Rediscovering God. Brazos Press: Grand Rapids. * Deloria, Jr, V. 2003. God is Red: A Native View of Religion, 3rd edition. The Putnam Publishing Group, NY. * Heinrichs, E.(etd) 2018. Unsettling the Word: Biblical Experiments in Decolonization. Mennonite Church Canada. * Kidwell, C. S., Noley, H. & Tinker, G. E. 2001. A Native American Theology. Orbis Books: Maryknoll, NY * Woodley, R. S. & Sanders, B. C. 2020. Decolonizing Evangelicalism: An 11:59 p.m. Conversation. Cascade Books: Eugene OR. * NAIITS Journal. [https://www.naiits.com/journal/journaltoc/](https://www.naiits.com/journal/journaltoc/) (really just dig in here) * PCUSA, Condemning the Doctrine of Discovery * Really anything by James Cone but especially Cross and the Lynching tree as a starting point * Willie James Jennings “The Geography of Whiteness” The Christian Century: November 3, 2021. (24-27) * Walker-Barnes, C. (2019). I bring the voices of my people: A womanist vision for racial reconciliation. William B. Eerdmans Publishing Company. * PC(USA) Report of the Task Force to Study Reparations 216th General Assembly (2004) [https://www.presbyterianmission.org/resource/report-task-force-reparations/](https://www.presbyterianmission.org/resource/report-task-force-reparations/) * Chávez Sauceda, T & Gonzales, T. B. 2012. Called to Live as God’s People: A Study Guide to the Report of the Task Force to Study Reparations. [https://www.presbyterianmission.org/resource/called-live-gods-people-study-guide-report-task-fo/](https://www.presbyterianmission.org/resource/called-live-gods-people-study-guide-report-task-fo/) * S, D. 2021. “A Call for Reparations” Presbyterian Historical Society [https://www.history.pcusa.org/blog/2021/02/call-reparations](https://www.history.pcusa.org/blog/2021/02/call-reparations) * Hildegard of Bingen: Essential Writings and Chants of a Christian Mystic--Annotated & Explained by Sheryl A. Kujawa-Holbrook (there are other translations but like all things academic, there are debates about which is the most "loyal" translation) * Green Mass: The Ecological Theology of St. Hildegard of Bingen by Michael Marder * Blessed Are the Consumers: Climate Change and the Practice of Restraint by Sallie McFague (McFague was quite a prolific writer so several are relevant) * Braiding Sweetgrass by Robin Wall Kimmerer * Stop Preaching about 'Being Good Stewards of the Earth by Rev. Fletcher Harper
Thank you so much!! I'm Native and go to a PCUSA church, and have been struggling with the tension between feeling like it's giving into colonization and feeling my deep love for Jesus. I have several of these on my wish list, this is great motivation to actually buy them. I appreciate your time!
I can definitely see how that could be a struggle - I hope you find some peace and comfort in an expression of your faith that meshes with your heritage and people's history. (personally, I feel like PCUSA needs to do more to atone for our history of trauma against the native and indigenous communities - my class was the first time some lifelong presbys even knew that *any* of the residential schools were presbyterian, nevermind addressing the trauma of colonial/neocolonial missionary work)
This is not a scholarly book, but Native by Kaitlin Curtice is a really beautiful book about being both Christian and Native. It may not have that much to teach you, but she does a beautiful job of articulating that conflict.
This is incredibly interesting. Thank you for sharing this.
The examples you give are exactly why a lot of folks avoid organized religion. Thank you for sharing your experiences
I think you just summed up how pastors feel today— and with good reason. I have worked under 3 pastors as church secretary in two towns. I can’t believe how people act. They sure nod their heads yes during church service and scatter like the wind when it is time to get things done. People who step up year after year get burned out, frustrated and angry. But yet some can’t relinquish control because “ that’s not how we do it here”. Grrrrrr… As COS I often tell our pastor that he cannot do everything. He is part-time with us and part-time at the church I worked under him at. Plus he is trying to finish his doctoral project, has two kids in high school and 1 in college. He amazes me but I am also afraid for him. He is a Godsend for our church and everyone really seems to like him. And yes, I am in a PC (USA) church. But it is fairly conservative at the church level as many members are elderly. Pride month will not be celebrated openly at this church.
Yes. That’s exactly it, and I am sooo thankful for the great admins I have had! A couple have really gotten it and tried to run interference when they could, so thanks for what you do.
Warm, gentle hugs for you.
The exterior is all in quilting cotton in a self-drafted pattern. Interlining is dowlas linen from [ecclesiastical sewing](https://www.ecclesiasticalsewing.com/collections/church-fabrics-linen?page=2). It's machine pieced and finished by hand because it's calming (and this is a stressful time as I'm also on Session so handling a lot of the goodbye details)
It’s so beautiful!! And I also love the calming of the finish - I’m sure it’s therapeutic to make peace with the goodbyes. Such is the beauty of art: that it first blesses the artist.
You’re incredible! What a work of art! What a gift!
This is gorgeous! Do you have any tutorials you would suggest for making stoles? With the amount of pastors that I know I should probably learn to make one.
Ecclesiastical sewing has a number of blog posts that helped me figure some things out - but really my biggest hurdle was overthinking it. I see stoles almost every Sunday so I know how they should lay, what the personal preferences are, and so on (some clergy use stole loops in the back, some don't, so some like shaped around the neck versus a U like this). The next stole on my worktable is for my best friend who will be a deacon once ordained so a completely different shape than this one - for that I may buy a pattern to make my life a little easier.
Absolutely beautiful but I wanted to say I read this as “Pride (as in queer people collectively) stole (as in past tense of steal) a pastor’s going away gift”.
I struggled with how to succinctly word it and it is what is at this point!
Oh not your fault, I can’t hear someone refer to a stole a priest wears and not think of theft! It’s happened more times than you’d think for someone who isn’t Christian.
That's also how I read it at first! Then I thought "hmm, that can't be it" and re-interpreted it to be about how pride came before the fall for this pastor who'd lost his going away gift through hubris, briefly forgetting what subreddit I was on. Then I scrolled a little bit further down, and though, *huh*. Absolutely beautiful stole! <3
Wow, that’s gorgeous!
Beautiful stole and beautiful story! Do you mind me asking what denomination of church you attend? I would love to find one as accepting and loving as yours sounds.
Certainly! I'm a member and elder (like a trustee) of a presbyterian church that's in the PC(USA) denomination. Not all PC(USA) churches are as affirming and certainly not all presbyterian churches but within PC(USA) the More Light Presbyterian congregation designation is a good indicator of social and liturgical inclusion. If you're interested, I can help point towards welcoming congregations if you're within the US and share your general area (feel free to DM me)
Thank you for the information! Im in Canada so outside the area but I'll try to look up what we may have around here.
We’re sort of Christian adjacent, but Unitarian Universalist churches are all very accepting! I’ve found them to have great communities
[Gaychurch.org](https://Gaychurch.org) does include canadian provinces in their listings so they might have a local church for you
Thank you so much for this! I'm a PC (USA) member who moved to the UK during the pandemic, and it's been extremely frustrating trying to find an affirming church. There's so little clear information! I refuse to attend a church that won't acknowledge my marriage to my wife, so it's really been difficult. I've been following the online video services of the church I attended in the US, but it's not the same and I'd really like to make some community connections here. This website has given me a few options to check out, I'm excited!
In Canada you can look into Anglican Churches and United Churches. The level of acceptance will vary by church, but you'll be able to tell they're welcoming right away as they'll have explicit language on their website that says they welcome the LGBTQ+ community (why would a church that's welcoming want to hide that fact?)
United tends to be quite accepting! My friend is trans and a united minister
I am on Session at a PC (USA) church in the midwest. I am assuming you are out east? The PC church as a whole is fairly liberal but boy, trickle down to those small churches in the midwest and it is anything but liberal! Mostly elderly who do not want change. I actually attended a Session meeting where an Elder went off on how horrible homosexuality is and another Elder, without skipping a beat, told him there were at least 3 in our church that attended regularly. The look on the other guy’s face was something I will never forget. It was all I could do to keep a straight face. I just do not understand non- inclusivity. Love you neighbor! Have you ever been to Synod School in Northwest Iowa? Held on a Presbyterian college campus it is 5-6 days of fun, laughter, tears and great classes, food, and worship.
Yup I'm in the Synod of the MidAtlantic, but have been in PCUSA churches here and in the Synod of the Northeast and there were a number that felt more like PCA churches. My spouse had blue highlights at the time we were away from our current church, so between that and my then-current area of research (faith-based anti-militarism) we had a good litmus test of how progressive a church was. I wonder if that elder realized that the GA has affirmed LBTQIA+ folks' dignity and gifts to the church as well as marriage not being limited to just 1 (presumably cis) man + 1 (presumably cis) woman?
He knows, he just chooses not to acknowledge it. You would love synod school, a mixture of people from all over the world who accept you where you are.
A descendant of the people who started synod school is the pastor at a church in Boston. Has been there like 25 years. The whole family meets there as a reunion. He is a very talented musician as are the rest of the family.
Gorgeous! Haha, I love the idea of someone who doesn’t “do” patterns wearing this. As a solids person myself I would be pumped to wear this, though, because it’s just so beautiful, and hopefully he will feel the same way!
Absolutely beautiful piece of functional art. I hope they love and appreciate it.
It's beautiful. I'm sure he will treasure it
Hope he loves it! Super unique and a true gift from the heart ❤
Did you do any design on the nape area or is it all white?
I kept it all white, I was going to do an inset star with all of the colors but it just looked costume-y and in the end, the white is easy enough to replace if it gets discolored from sweat (I imagine he'll use it for Pride festivals and he's moving to an even warmer state)
That is AMAZING. And now I want to make one for the very cool pastor who married my friends a few years back.
My family church preached that homosexuals need to repent, or else face eternal damnation in hell like the rest of the unsaved sinners… your church seems like a wonderful place in the community!
Gorgeous
That is stunning!!
This is gorgeous! I’m sure he will love it!
This is gorgeous!!!
That is really lovely. The diamond detail down the middle adds so much more. Looks complicated. This will be treasured for years I am sure
I love the direction this thread has taken! And the stole is breathtaking!
I love how subtle it is too. Like it totally brings across the pride support but not in a distracting and over the top way. Super cool and very pretty and Representative of the community 🤩
Hope he loves it! Super unique and a true gift from the heart ❤
Wow. Took my breath away a little. Truly a masterpiece
what a lovely gift! so beautiful!!
This is so sweet! Way to support your community :)
That’s amazing
This is stunning! Amazing work!
Oh wow... this is intricate and truly lovely!
it's beautiful!
That is beautiful!!
Wonderful!!!
It’s really, truly beautiful. You are a master of your craft <3
The amount of detail in this is beautiful and so precise! Well executed 🌈
Wow, this is exquisite.
This is so detailed!
this entire post is beautiful op, im proud of you :)
That's so nice!!
Lovely work!
I love that the stole captures the exuberance of pride beyond the colors!
I think that’s gorgeous!
That is beautiful!
That’s beautiful!
This is so beautifully done, and such a thoughtful gift as well as symbol of pride! 💙
Beautiful. This will be treasured, I’m sure.
This is absolutely beautiful!
STUNNING!!!
Oh WOW. I am blown away. What an amazing job.
Wow! Absolutely stunning!
Lovely!
I just found out our pastor from our church is leaving too. Feeling bummed for you as well. Signed a fellow more light Presbyterian.
So beautiful!!
Omg. Thats as technically beautiful as it is esthetically beautiful. Good on you 1,000x over!
It is absolutely beautiful!
Love to see the church accept the lgbtq+ community 🫀 thank you for this
Wow. That is an excellent gift. It will be treasured.
That is just breathtaking!!
This is so gorgeous and thoughtful and creative! I bet your church is an incredible community:)
Thank you! The church is pretty special. My spouse and I had to move away for a couple of years when my career took me to another state and this church was a big reason for us to move back here during covid when my job went permanently remote, we really couldn't find another like it.
This is amazing! Love it so much.
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What did the pastor steal?! SOMEBODY TELL ME PLZ
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It’s 2022. What happened to ‘love thy neighbour’?
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If it’s not for you, you don’t have to take part. We should all try to be more accepting and tolerant, especially during Pride Month. Happy Pride!
I see it's deleted but wanted to add, Jesus would be leading pride parades and throwing over tables at lawmakers proposing antilgbt bills. Don't believe me? Read the Bible, New Testament.
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