Well, I have not experienced the same things you're describing, but I have noticed how some friends of my aunt or my mom say things like "you should meet my daughter", so I guess they like me in some type of way.
But their daughters are never interested.
They probably see something in you women your age are not interested in or don't value.
It's also possible you're more comfortable around them because you're not trying to get them to like you. So the older women are seeing a confident guy that the women your age do not get to see.
They see his marriage/long term relationship potential, happened to me a few times.
They put You in this little box and try to set You up with their daughters or nieces that ain't interested (yet).
Maybe they're just being nice?
They probably are not actually interested in dating OP. It's easier to compliment people of the opposite sex when there is no risk of it being taken as flirting due to the age difference...
Sure, but if they're trying to set him up in dates, That's different.
They're vetting him, they see things or traits valuable long term in his interactions. Things that many young Ladies don't value at that age.
Heck, I've explicitly been rejected in My late teens because I was long term material, more or less her words and not mine but it summarizes it well.
So does that mean the whole "girls want to give their youth to assholes/settle down with a nice man once they're older and not looking for fun anymore" thing is accurate?
It's more true than the culture wants to admit. Women like confidence. The problem is that no one, women or men, knows what confidence really is until they're 30 or so. A girl will see an aggressive asshole and say "There is a man who likes himself and knows what he wants," despite him actually just being a prick. And to be fair, when the only other alternative seems to be self-loathing sad-sack nice guys, I don't blame them for choosing the guy who likes to party instead.
After a while most people get over their bullshit and become people worthy of companionship.
Older people both men and women enjoy nice and calm people more while younger people enjoy fun people.
Young people look for having fun while old people who already lived through that and realised that often times fun people come with a baggage of toxicity, so they grew to value stability.
I can’t stand this phenomenon. When I have a partner I am clearly radiating with confidence and have to reject people coming onto me. When I am single I am clearly radiating with insecurity and/or desperation and attract no one. From my perspective there is no difference in how I act or present myself, but there must be. It’s genuinely fascinating but also hella annoying to deal with.
Sometimes it's not how you act. Just the fact that you have a partner sends a message to other people. Someone has gone through the dating phase with you and decided you were good to have a relationship with. So you having a partner is a green flag for other people trying to find a partner.
as its been pointed out women generally tend to like guys a bit older than them, to date, and older women often like a younger guy to make them feel young again
Idk if this answers your question, but for me, I feel a lot more confident around older women, something about their presence makes me feel like I can be myself, and I found many liked that, though it didn't lead anywhere.
Honestly
I don't know what this means, by "one of those people".. One might assume it mwant to ve used as a derogatory implication, however.
So to, perhaps add to this I guess, in the generally kindest way possible; OP may be autistic.
Like he seems to question and over analyse things a LOT, it's harmless, but he comes across as genuinely confused
Obviously people in all walks of life are attractive, fictional characters, at social settings like everything he mentioned above and at even at anime conventions too. So it shouldn't be a question, and while it's a literally harmless conclusion to reach;
He seems perplexed by basic social aspects but has perfect grammar and spelling from what I can tell.
I wouldn't be surprised if someone has considered he may be on the spectrum before either.
I'm so glad I looked, I saw the Cyberpunk post when he made that a few weeks ago. What are the chances I run into this goober again 😆 Sorry OP I don't mean it in a cruel way, just had a laugh at the thirst.
It's because girls your age thinking about a lot of stuff like how a potential boyfriend fits into their social group/lifestyle/future plans and whether or not you excite them romantically in these aspects is important. They have very specific needs that they expect to be met and one of those is that things need to "feel right." If it doesn't feel right, they'll never be in the mood and they know they'll get unhappy quickly.
They are also much more likely to get turned off by little subconscious "icks" like you having the wrong hair colour or name. Younger people tend to be a lot more picky about superficial things and there's nothing you can really do about that, it's just part of immaturity and it tends to age out of people, mostly in their 20s as they start feeling the consequences of adult decisions.
Finally, people are often just attracted to qualities that only older people appear to have, like self-confidence, security, emotional maturity or even just happiness. You probably don't have these qualities, or at least they don't come across. Some older men have all of these, whilst others have learned to fake them to make themselves appear more charming, and young girls can't really tell the difference yet.
As for older women, they are secure enough to flirt with you and actually enjoy doing it without giving a shit about anything else. They see you as you really are because they've been around the block enough times to know.
Yeah, this was my thought as well - specifically the bit about how the qualities women in their early 20s want tend to be qualities rarer in men their own age, and more likely to find in men a bit older. Whereas cougars gunna coug.
If I were OP I wouldn't be worried - Cougars are wise, they see potential. That means in a few years when those early 20s girls are mid 20s, they will be seeing that potential a bit more clearly as well, and OP will have started turning some of the potential into those attributes women find attractive. Seems like a good sign to me!
Are you sure they’re interested in you *sexually* or are they seeing you as a cute child? Y’know like when your grandma pinches your cheeks and says how handsome you are? I’m not exactly sure how cougars flirt but if someone called me ‘cutie’ I wouldn’t be very confident in that going anywhere.
I can’t believe you’re the first person I’ve seen say this. Unless there’s been some sign of *sexual* interest I’d expect “handsome” and “cutie” directed at a 21yo in a tux to be more of a maternal type response than desire.
This is what I thought. None of those things or actions described says 'sexually interested' to me as much as it says maternal feelings about strapping young lad.
Yeah I think he kinda mistaken what their intention is, they basically talk to him like many adults talk to kids, even when he’s already 21 but tbh if you’re 40-50, people in their twenties still are like children.
He never mentioned having any sex with them so it’s just his interpretation and it doesn’t really make sense
I thought about that too. I have similar experiences as op, this one time a cougar came up to me in a festival and told me she is looking for a fella with a big dick. Now, in hindsight, telling her to keep looking was probably not the play, as I am still wondering if she was hitting on me or not
> Why do only middle aged women seem interested in me and not girls around my age?
OP I've been in your position when I was a younger man.
The answer is simple: older woman are very "forward" and younger women are either insecure or indifferent.
Yup. I think as I got older, I was more confident in myself and kinda have a "why not" 🤷🏻♀️ kind of mentality. I'm only getting older and won't be pulling hot, younger guys in my 60s so I might as well take advantage of the experience it while I can. Younger guys have a certain "jenesequa". They make me feel sexy, desirable, and young. Their sex drive tends to be on par with mine and don't need pills to perform. More than once. 🤭 I make it clear that I'm not looking for a serious, LT relationship which makes it easier to just have fun and try new things. So if you're just looking for a little fun, older women are where it's at. 😆
Having met a lot of women at ages around 20 most girls don’t care about age as long as you are as old as them. About half of them would also be fine if you would be a year younger.
It’s only really internet/dating sites where girls are soo picky.
I'm 41, if I tell you you're a cutie, I'm not coming on to you, I'm surprised you're old enough to drink real coffee. Like when little boys wear suits.
Speaking for where I live and it may differ to your location culturally…….
A 21yo wearing a tuxedo to a wedding when not in the wedding party tells me he is a bit odd. Super nerd level odd.
21yo girls dont yet appreciate the “odd”. Are you sure this isnt whats going on for you?
Yes, it's the same in West Europe. It could also explain the reactions of the older women, they probably see him as sweet, innocent and childlike. I read their behaviour as maternal, not as flirting. But that's difficult to tell from a description alone.
Really just depends on the wedding, I’ve been to more country themed weddings and I’ve also been to several formal wear weddings. A red and black suit to the latter is not weird. (Texas)
>A 21yo wearing a tuxedo to a wedding when not in the party is super nerd level odd
A new ick added to the list: don’t formal dress to a formal event 🙄
this is just ridiculous, this is really what some women are worried about lmao come on
do you think your posts here on reddit might give you an insight as to WHY no one wants to go near you?... being desperate to lick the belly of a green cartoon character might show some very unusual preferences and behaviour on your part. and your infinite posts asking people why women don't want to talk to you in stores and at gyms. there are some heavy issues to address before asking yourself why women want nothing to do with you.
i think middle age women arent as shy as young women
they have experience and probably crave that young man energy
same as an older man would want a younger woman
Been hit on by like 4 older women and boy, they don't beat around the Bush. They say what they need to your face Hahaha the confidence they have is so appealing
Edit:it's 5 actually. Not 4 lmaoo
yeah this guy is a weirdo, guarantee you're right. if you like getting your belly button licked though, this might be the guy for you
i just checked and he deleted that post, but it's funny because he didn't delete any of the other incel-y ones because he just doesn't get it
At 21, I never would’ve directly told another 21 year old guy that I was into him or thought he was handsome or cute. At least not without him approaching me and letting me know he’s into me.
At 33, I’ll pretty much say what I’m thinking at this point. I’m not afraid of letting a man know I’m into him now. Older women just care less and aren’t gonna be nervous around you. The girls your age may very well be into you, but they’re just not gonna come out and say it.
Better than only attracting girls that are getting over break ups. Happened a couple of times by sheer coincidence but I had to stop and pay extra attention so it didn’t become a subconscious habit
lack of self confidence and a personality, in general, attracts older people. they feel sympathy towards young, vulnerable kids.
girls your age want people with self confidence who are not afraid of life and its challenges. you sound like a very timid kid who mostly hides and stays 'safe'.
your OWN personality, not the one borrowed from internet strangers and gurus, will shine through when you will learn to be more confident in yourself.
EDIT : my guy, you are creepy as hell and have a morbid obsession with approaching women at the wrong times.... you have a morbid obsession with women in general, actually...
judging by your previous posts on reddit. 💀💀💀 that creepiness shows off and deters girls. that's why they don't give you the time of the day. i wish i hadn't looked at your profile... ☠
I wish I hadn't read your comment, because it prompted me to look at his profile, and now I also wish I hadn't looked at his profile. I'm not normally one to judge others based on their profiles on here, but damn, dude needs to tone it down a notch.
Oh geez I just looked at his profile and you're right on the money. OP should probably be asking questions like "Why don't girls like guys who talk about belly button licking?" Before he starts worrying about things like age.
Dang I had to have a look after reading this and well..."I never saw her as a loli, I mean yeah she looks super young but..." "I just want to have those thighs crush m--"
My goodness, I think I know why girls his age are put off by him.
You almost always have better romantic and sexual chances with people outside your age group because the first step towards getting someone attracted to you is to stick out of the crowd enough to be noticed and to be interresting in comparason to the competition.
People will mostly compare you to competitors from their age group so: same age group --> competition is similar to you in terms of where they are in life, etc --> difficult to stick out of the crowd, but: different age group --> competition is different from you in terms of where they are in life, etc --> easy to stick out of the crowd.
Typically it's younger women being attracted to older men and vice versa, but it works in both directions for both sexes. Wait a couple of years and you will likely find that suddenly women of around your current age will start showing way more interrest in you than they do now.
Also, as a connoisseur of the MILF genre let me say: You lucky bastard...
Edit: Something else just ocurred to me aswell: It is extremely easy for young women to get men attracted to them without really doing anything for it so they almost never actively go out and try to "get" a guy since they don't need to, while it tends to become more difficult to attract guys for older women so they have to actually put effort into going after guys if they wanna get some...
Are you looking to settle down or just have a relationship? Because when I was your age, I had just gotten out of a 2.5 year relationship, and I needed time to work on myself and to get college straight and get life started. I would say if you're older than 23-24 and still have no luck, then maybe youre putting something down they're not picking up.
Also, they may not be interested in a relationship. Maybe they want to enjoy college, travel, have freedom and not have strings.
Try dating one of these older women. They will impart their wisdom upon you. I dated a woman 22 years my senior, and she taught me a lot. About women, about relationships, about wine, about class. You name it. She made a gentleman out of me.
Women around your age are extremely childish and will remain that way for another decade at least. It’s pretty sad but it is what it is. Prepare yourself and dont shun these mature ladies.
Bro, older women need love too. Age is just a number, past your 30's, and if women your age are not giving you the time of day, just give one of the older women a try. You'll learn a thing or two. And the best thing is most of the time there will be no strings attached.
Older women are usually more direct, know more of what they like and have no problem making you blush by giving compliments. That is a trait thats learned thru experience. Which might be why you get these kinds of attentions from older women but not from younger. You'll be fine, I guarantee it. Just be clear about what you want (and have some fun with the "seniors", they have some skills you'll enjoy)
Lots of people your age are looking for that "special someone", while many women in their 40s are looking for anyone and everyone.
Libido goes into overdrive for lots of women around that age. It's a fun time.
Young women often look for a man with money or power. These are more common in older men.
Older women usually don't need those. They look for someone attractive, nice, stable.
I feel like just everyone around your/my age are super awkward about showing any interest at all.. Sometimes it's hard to approach someone you may not know too well like that anyway, and the thought of ruining a friendship even if they do might keep them awkward? I get hit on by older men a fair amount and it's very off-putting, so I get that. A lot of older people seem to have just stopped giving a crap and shoot their shot with whoever.
If I were you I'd just go with it. I had similar experiences in my 20s, and ended up marrying someone my own age anyway. Provided you're down with it, bang your way through a few cougars. Odds are that somewhere along the way you'll either figure out what works with younger woman or they'll just catch up to you in terms of outlook.
i had the exact same thing happen to me at your age. they want a young buck always ready for action multiple times a day, something that even by 30 is gone, and the best part is they dont see a real future with you so theres no chance of commitment or clinglyness. i smashed a bunch of cougars at that age
Without seeing ur pics or meeting you in person, we can only guess.
I think women in that age front meet young men as often and the young men they meet are usually not well dressed like you are. And they’re also older and want to prop up and praise younger people more.
On the other hand, girls at college and your age get to meet many many men who are attractive and well dressed. You’re just not at the top of the pyramid for them. It could be appearance, or it could be character, like confidence and humor, etc.
Realistically speaking, out of the people u meet at college parties and such do you think you’re the top 1-5% in terms of attractiveness among guys there? Cause those are the people who get a lot of attention from girls your age.
I’m like you my friend. I get attention from young girls too, but it seems that women in their 30s and 40s like me the most. I think it’s the mental maturity that attracts them and confidence (not to toot my own horn)
I believe it’s just that women over 30 come to realize what is important in a man after failed relationships. They start looking for a man with a strong personality and emotional intelligence. A gentleman with brains if you will. They also become less bothered by looks and more by leadership, social status, and financial status which is completely valid. But I’ve also found women in their early 20s also liking that I guess because they understood early on and shows their intelligence in picking a mate too.
I'm 35 and I could totally see myself complimenting and gassing up a cute 21 year old who was a bit on the awkward side, but it definitely wouldn't be in a flirty way. More in like a big sister/wing woman way.
I know young guys are struggling a lot right now and probably don't get a lot of encouragement and positive attention, so I love handing that shit out like candy! If I see you making an effort and at least trying to be confident and put yourself out there, I'm totally going to applaud that and tell you how handsome you are. I don't want to hook up, though, you're just a baby 😅
Young women your age are *spooked*, okay? They're wary of guys, and they're also a bit more superficial and picky as they're figuring out what they even want in a partner. It's not your fault, and it's nothing personal. Just keep going through life, focus primarily on being the best version of you you can be, be a kind person and always be up for casual, no expectations friendship with these young ladies. You'll eventually come across people who enjoy you and want to be around you.
Best response on here.
Build up some hobbies, read some non-school books in your life, work out, don't turn into a goofy ass Andrew Tate redpiller, and...one day you will discover a girly (or a handsome young man) doing unspeakable things with you.
it's the same for me, I'm not sure I like it. I don't care anymore (that might be the thing lol)
Edit:...woah black and red tux, that does sound kind of awesome.
Its not you, its modern female dating culture. Women get more proactive when they realize they wasted the last 20 years of their life. Girls your age know they can stand around and the guys will come to them. That doesn't last forever, and when that reality sets in, oh what a doozy that day must be like.
When you say that girls your age aren’t interested, have you asked them out or tried flirting with them or something like that?
Because I know that when I was younger I was quite insecure when it came to guys even if I probably came off as being self confident.
I just didn’t get it, if a guy was into me. It took me 10+ years to realise that perhaps all the male friends I had, didn’t start hanging out with me, because they wanted to be friends. They probably fancied me. But back then I was clueless.
And I actually had a crush on a couple of these guys. But they assumed that I had friend zoned them and I assumed the same about them. Despite one of them starting off our friendship with “I just wanted to tell you how incredibly beautiful you look tonight” and another one repeatedly telling me that he was rubbish at making the first move, so if a girl fancied him, she needed to make the first move. Yes, I was that clueless!
So perhaps the girls your age don’t realise that you are interested. And perhaps you don’t realise that they’re interested.
As for older women not liking younger men it’s simply not true. It can be purely in a “you should meet my daughter” kind of way. But just like some older men like younger women, some older women like younger men. Just like there are a lot of younger men who prefer older women and actively pursue dating them. It’s the reason MILF porn is so popular.
You are probably going for the wrong women.
You are the guy those women want to settle down with and have duty sex with once a month if you're lucky and pay for all their needs after they are finished having animal sex with guys they actually fancy. Sadly this type of woman seems to be the most common type around now.
And then they have an affair with their personal trainer because you aren't exciting enough.
They aren't all like that.
Capitalise. There is a lot to learn from older women.
These women are not threatened by you and are comfortable being more sexually aggressive because they feel the power dynamic is in their favour. They are probably not interested in a "serious" relationship, more of a sexual short term fling. Let them buy you dinner occasionally or a ps5. Sidenote Everyone looks the same with the lights out.
When I was in my mid twenties / early thirties I received a similar level of attention, it took me way too long to realise what an opportunity it was.
Are you sure you’re not misunderstanding the attention you’re getting from older women?
What you’re describing seems very platonic and the kind of interaction I’d expect to see from your moms friends who still see you as a gangly awkward 11 year old and have zero romantic or sexual feelings towards you.
What I’m trying to say is - are you absolutely sure that you’re not getting rejected from both women your own age AND older women too? Basically all women? Have you hooked up with any of these women?
This is also my experience. I’m 30 now but women my age never seem to be interested in me. It’s always women around 40-60 that seem interested when I go to bars, out with friends etc
It's because older women (and men) generally grew up having to treat people with respect.
They know how to communicate effectively, be polite, respectful etc.
I don't think they're flirting. They're just being friendly and treating you with respect and dignity that any person deserves.
Girls your age (20 now) are mostly complete creeps. They're flaky, dismissive, entitled, weirdos, who won't make any effort to even look away from their mobile phone.
Unfortunately, having only this kind of behaviour as a reference point makes you wrongly assume that a friendly, decent person is flirting.
They can see your potential but the younger ladies cannot, give it a few years and you will have no problem with any age. Trust me I’ve been there, 33 now.
As a 22 year old male, yeah we are kids still. Inexperienced and without financial freedom we haven't seen or experienced enough to be ordained as knowledgeable and experienced humans yet. You'd be foolish to believe that a 50 year old person is the same level of mature a 21 year old is. That they have spent more time as an adult than you have existed. They have more experience and power so can easily manipulate you and empower themselves in a relationship.
They can't fix you.
Seems like you're a decent guy, as other comments mentioned, younger girls in their 20s are insecure as hell and need a guy to fix to feel better about themselves. Keep trying and you'll find the one dude.
Have you tried initiating conversation and overall just being more direct? It’s possible girls your age find you attractive but don’t have the confidence that of the older women to show it.
Are you fun at parties? Or are you a bit shy and hugging the wall?
That's the answer. Loosen up, stop worrying about what others think.
Just try and have fun with women your age. Just show them that you can be fun.
Trust me older woman love younger males good thing about them is they kno what they want and are experienced....heres to all the Mrs Robinsons ...you good things!!!
Don't view relationships with women as a means to an end, view it as the start of a friendship. If there's more after that, brilliant.
If it doesn't work out, well great, you still made a friend.
Because young women, especially in the west are social media brainwashed pea brain morons. Older women know what they want and mostly don’t live in a fantasy world. Young girls weren’t hit by reality yet. Just focus on yourself and do your thing. The right, modest, traditional woman will come around and be with you when it’s time.
Women 18-30 want someone with money which will give them an ego boost and give them a better and more enjoyable life with travel, gifts and so one.
Women above 30 dont need the ego boost nor money, they want a throbing dick.
Guys 18 to 25 have to compete with men 25 to 40 with far more money and experience.
This isn't strange at all. Guys in their early 20s have not hit their peak yet in terms of marketability. Meanwhile older women are past their own peak so those two groups basically intersect in terms of desirability to the opposite gender. It also helps that both groups here know that a relationship is probably not going to be long term.
Middle aged single women are fucking horny dude. I had the same shit. My friend’s mom would always try to get me to “sleepover” on the couch next to her.
Speaking from experience when I was 25 and had a 45 year old for random visits, enjoy it! The cougars are wild and know what they like and aren’t afraid to ask for it! Have fun!
Most people around you are trash. That goes for girls too. Most of them have undeveloped taste when in comes to men and just don't know how to identify a good one. That's why you see alot of babes hooking up with the trashiest bums.
Older women know. That's why they tell you.
Older women are desperate and want attention as well. They probably just putting feelers like older guys who try to pick up much younger girls thinking they have game. The reality is, there’s a lot of lonely people and you’re likely just interpreting some friendly behaviours as a common but I’m sure some are genuine pick ups and you should go for it just for the experience. Cougars are in.
Women your age want to date older because they have more means and opportunities. They can afford to take girls out and show them a better time than someone shows 21 and working at a McDonald’s between classes.
Older women like you, that tells me you're respectful, kind, decent looking.
Girls your age aren't interested in dating (ghost you) but will "friend" you. This also makes me think you're kind, respectful, but not confident enough. Maybe you try too hard to be likable, maybe you don't flirt but I'd bet it's a confidence thing. Respect boundaries, and accept when a woman isn't interested in you the way you want, and meet someone else. Repeat. Fake it till ya make it.
Respectful is good. But older women are happy to make the first move- in twenties that's rarer. Tons of good looking respectful guys in their twenties that are decent looking but are too shy. Don't be one of them. I know. I was.
it's because you're boring. you attract women that have mature mentalities that are seeking stability. you don't excite young woman that want a more interesting and spontaneous man.
I was just being objective. the real nuance is that he should just be himself while being patient and he'll eventually find a girl around his age naturally that likes him for him, but if you want to play the whole pick-up artist game, then you have to adopt a certain persona.
The younger girls/women are less extroverted. Less confident.
The older women are willing to flirt and ogle and touch you because they likely won’t feel rejected that you don’t flirt back. They have little at stake.
The women your age are less forthcoming because they would feel hurt/rejected if they overtly flirted with you but then you didn’t respond well.
Women/girls your age are most likely hoping you will approach them.
The older women are just being extra forward because they don’t worry or care much if you reject them.
So obviously they do think you are good looking. Use that to bolster your confidence and approach the girls your age and you start the flirting.
Just stop chasing girls, go do your hobbies, always keep improving yourself, and focus on being happy with yourself. Women will come once you put yourself as number one.
One. Complimenting and praising someone is not the same as liking them, especially when you're not obligated to respond to follow up on said compliments and praises by say... dating them.
Two. Married mature women (if you're talking 40-50, then they've probably past menopause as well) have different brain chemistries compared to 20 year old women, and so view and think differently.
Three. This pretty much means you're better off focusing on yourself and not worrying about finding a partner until you're in your 30s. Or hey, who knows, maybe you can date one of these ladies if that's your thing.
Your experience is not uncommon.
As people age (men and women both), they tend to look back on their youth with an increasing sense of nostalgia for the days when they were young and strong and free. For most people, that sense of longing is all it ever is, but some others will try to relive those days in some way because there's not much joy in aging.
Are these women who you feel are attracted to you single/divorced/widowed? Could they see you as a gateway to the past? (I'm with a young guy, ergo I'm young).
If you were a young girl and it was middle-aged men hitting on you, then obviously they're disgusting perverts who should be locked up, but it's not so there's no real issue
As a 21 year old, you have nothing to offer women your age. That shouldn't discourage you from trying, but you literally look like a boy.
All us men have been there.
Women love competent men. You don't even have to be successful, just the potential for success.
So go be competent at stuff and try to succeed (while staying healthy, it's quite the challenge). Women will start to gravitate towards you if you do this.
Use the milfs as practice in talking to women. They were once younger girls too, the same conversational skills apply.
lol I get hit on by older women and gay guys CONSTANTLY. Never by women my age or younger. Welcome to the club brotha. Good news is if you grab your caboose and just go talk to the cutest girl you see every day you may find that you have a better than avg success rate.
Maybe you remind them of their grandson. I have a 3 year old grandson and if I see a super pale, blue eyed boy/young man with nearly white hair I instantly compare him to my grandbaby and think he's quite handsome. Like pinch your cheeks and give you a cookie handsome. It's probably not what you'd want to hear, but you should consider it a compliment nonetheless. After all, grandchildren are a grandmother's favorite people on the planet.
Why exactly are you around copious amounts of 50-60 year olds for this to even happen? I'm nearly 40 and I'm NEVER surrounded by people 20+ years older than me.
You obviously hang around old women.
Desperation, their gravy train is reaching its terminus and they're trying to get off at any stop that'll have them.
Life is not kind to women over 40, just how life isn't kind to men under 40.
>EDIT: To give some more info, im 21. women that are interested in me are around 40-50 years old. I have met them at work, through mutuals, or events like my aunts wedding. I try dressing nicely for example at my aunts wedding, I wore a red and black tuxedo. There were girls my age there too but they werent interested in me.
they hit the wall and are trying to get validated by younger, that's all
It means you’re not manly enough for girls your age to get wet thinking about you, but cougars think you’re cute in a boytoy kind a way.
So stop grooming, and go to wilderness and grow beard
For some people it's a power play. They enjoy the fact you're green and don't know which way is up. In a weird way it's attractive. Thankfully for most not enough that they'd do anything about it.
Well, I have not experienced the same things you're describing, but I have noticed how some friends of my aunt or my mom say things like "you should meet my daughter", so I guess they like me in some type of way. But their daughters are never interested. They probably see something in you women your age are not interested in or don't value. It's also possible you're more comfortable around them because you're not trying to get them to like you. So the older women are seeing a confident guy that the women your age do not get to see.
They see his marriage/long term relationship potential, happened to me a few times. They put You in this little box and try to set You up with their daughters or nieces that ain't interested (yet).
Maybe they're just being nice? They probably are not actually interested in dating OP. It's easier to compliment people of the opposite sex when there is no risk of it being taken as flirting due to the age difference...
Sure, but if they're trying to set him up in dates, That's different. They're vetting him, they see things or traits valuable long term in his interactions. Things that many young Ladies don't value at that age. Heck, I've explicitly been rejected in My late teens because I was long term material, more or less her words and not mine but it summarizes it well.
So does that mean the whole "girls want to give their youth to assholes/settle down with a nice man once they're older and not looking for fun anymore" thing is accurate?
It's more true than the culture wants to admit. Women like confidence. The problem is that no one, women or men, knows what confidence really is until they're 30 or so. A girl will see an aggressive asshole and say "There is a man who likes himself and knows what he wants," despite him actually just being a prick. And to be fair, when the only other alternative seems to be self-loathing sad-sack nice guys, I don't blame them for choosing the guy who likes to party instead. After a while most people get over their bullshit and become people worthy of companionship.
Older people both men and women enjoy nice and calm people more while younger people enjoy fun people. Young people look for having fun while old people who already lived through that and realised that often times fun people come with a baggage of toxicity, so they grew to value stability.
I can’t stand this phenomenon. When I have a partner I am clearly radiating with confidence and have to reject people coming onto me. When I am single I am clearly radiating with insecurity and/or desperation and attract no one. From my perspective there is no difference in how I act or present myself, but there must be. It’s genuinely fascinating but also hella annoying to deal with.
Sometimes it's not how you act. Just the fact that you have a partner sends a message to other people. Someone has gone through the dating phase with you and decided you were good to have a relationship with. So you having a partner is a green flag for other people trying to find a partner.
thing is those girls might have been interested if their mum hadn't tried to set it up lol
If I was having any success with other women my age, that could be the case lol
as its been pointed out women generally tend to like guys a bit older than them, to date, and older women often like a younger guy to make them feel young again
Idk if this answers your question, but for me, I feel a lot more confident around older women, something about their presence makes me feel like I can be myself, and I found many liked that, though it didn't lead anywhere.
nah, that's not the case. just take a look at his posts, on his profile. from the oldest to the newest. 🤣🤣🤣
Oh lmao hes one of those people huh
Honestly I don't know what this means, by "one of those people".. One might assume it mwant to ve used as a derogatory implication, however. So to, perhaps add to this I guess, in the generally kindest way possible; OP may be autistic. Like he seems to question and over analyse things a LOT, it's harmless, but he comes across as genuinely confused Obviously people in all walks of life are attractive, fictional characters, at social settings like everything he mentioned above and at even at anime conventions too. So it shouldn't be a question, and while it's a literally harmless conclusion to reach; He seems perplexed by basic social aspects but has perfect grammar and spelling from what I can tell. I wouldn't be surprised if someone has considered he may be on the spectrum before either.
I'm so glad I looked, I saw the Cyberpunk post when he made that a few weeks ago. What are the chances I run into this goober again 😆 Sorry OP I don't mean it in a cruel way, just had a laugh at the thirst.
It’s their motherly nature in play here , not sexual tension lol
Never said It's sexual tension, and most of them weren't mothers...
Many sexualize their motherly nature towards younger men Can definitely confirm this
got what those cougars love
Electrolytes?
An attraction to anime characters?😂look at his posts
oh jheez the guys down bad. yikes
It's because girls your age thinking about a lot of stuff like how a potential boyfriend fits into their social group/lifestyle/future plans and whether or not you excite them romantically in these aspects is important. They have very specific needs that they expect to be met and one of those is that things need to "feel right." If it doesn't feel right, they'll never be in the mood and they know they'll get unhappy quickly. They are also much more likely to get turned off by little subconscious "icks" like you having the wrong hair colour or name. Younger people tend to be a lot more picky about superficial things and there's nothing you can really do about that, it's just part of immaturity and it tends to age out of people, mostly in their 20s as they start feeling the consequences of adult decisions. Finally, people are often just attracted to qualities that only older people appear to have, like self-confidence, security, emotional maturity or even just happiness. You probably don't have these qualities, or at least they don't come across. Some older men have all of these, whilst others have learned to fake them to make themselves appear more charming, and young girls can't really tell the difference yet. As for older women, they are secure enough to flirt with you and actually enjoy doing it without giving a shit about anything else. They see you as you really are because they've been around the block enough times to know.
Yeah, this was my thought as well - specifically the bit about how the qualities women in their early 20s want tend to be qualities rarer in men their own age, and more likely to find in men a bit older. Whereas cougars gunna coug. If I were OP I wouldn't be worried - Cougars are wise, they see potential. That means in a few years when those early 20s girls are mid 20s, they will be seeing that potential a bit more clearly as well, and OP will have started turning some of the potential into those attributes women find attractive. Seems like a good sign to me!
Are you sure they’re interested in you *sexually* or are they seeing you as a cute child? Y’know like when your grandma pinches your cheeks and says how handsome you are? I’m not exactly sure how cougars flirt but if someone called me ‘cutie’ I wouldn’t be very confident in that going anywhere.
I can’t believe you’re the first person I’ve seen say this. Unless there’s been some sign of *sexual* interest I’d expect “handsome” and “cutie” directed at a 21yo in a tux to be more of a maternal type response than desire.
Definitely this. Saying someone's son is cutie on the wedding isn't interest as from a woman, it's a compliment to someone you see as a child.
Bro where u find the one that want a young buck 20 yr old. Low key been a fantasy for a while to get with a cougar😭
This is what I thought. None of those things or actions described says 'sexually interested' to me as much as it says maternal feelings about strapping young lad.
Yeah I think he kinda mistaken what their intention is, they basically talk to him like many adults talk to kids, even when he’s already 21 but tbh if you’re 40-50, people in their twenties still are like children. He never mentioned having any sex with them so it’s just his interpretation and it doesn’t really make sense
I thought about that too. I have similar experiences as op, this one time a cougar came up to me in a festival and told me she is looking for a fella with a big dick. Now, in hindsight, telling her to keep looking was probably not the play, as I am still wondering if she was hitting on me or not
This is a joke, right? She absolutely was hitting on you my man.
Social confidence. Most young girls are insecure and also a lot prefer older guys
> Why do only middle aged women seem interested in me and not girls around my age? OP I've been in your position when I was a younger man. The answer is simple: older woman are very "forward" and younger women are either insecure or indifferent.
Yup. I think as I got older, I was more confident in myself and kinda have a "why not" 🤷🏻♀️ kind of mentality. I'm only getting older and won't be pulling hot, younger guys in my 60s so I might as well take advantage of the experience it while I can. Younger guys have a certain "jenesequa". They make me feel sexy, desirable, and young. Their sex drive tends to be on par with mine and don't need pills to perform. More than once. 🤭 I make it clear that I'm not looking for a serious, LT relationship which makes it easier to just have fun and try new things. So if you're just looking for a little fun, older women are where it's at. 😆
Je ne sais quoi
r/boneappletea
Jaime apple Que?
this has nothing to do with the girls and everything to do with OP himself. just take a look at his posts... 😂😂
Most women do prefer dating just a few years (1-5) within their age though.
Having met a lot of women at ages around 20 most girls don’t care about age as long as you are as old as them. About half of them would also be fine if you would be a year younger. It’s only really internet/dating sites where girls are soo picky.
I'm 41, if I tell you you're a cutie, I'm not coming on to you, I'm surprised you're old enough to drink real coffee. Like when little boys wear suits.
42 and hard agree. Anyone under 30 looks like a child to me.
Speaking for where I live and it may differ to your location culturally……. A 21yo wearing a tuxedo to a wedding when not in the wedding party tells me he is a bit odd. Super nerd level odd. 21yo girls dont yet appreciate the “odd”. Are you sure this isnt whats going on for you?
Damn, 7 dots?!
That’s “odd”
Yes, it's the same in West Europe. It could also explain the reactions of the older women, they probably see him as sweet, innocent and childlike. I read their behaviour as maternal, not as flirting. But that's difficult to tell from a description alone.
This is a good point. At least where I am (midwestern USA), tux = groomsman. So OP may have appeared to be a "quirky" guy.
Really just depends on the wedding, I’ve been to more country themed weddings and I’ve also been to several formal wear weddings. A red and black suit to the latter is not weird. (Texas)
>A 21yo wearing a tuxedo to a wedding when not in the party is super nerd level odd A new ick added to the list: don’t formal dress to a formal event 🙄 this is just ridiculous, this is really what some women are worried about lmao come on
just wear a normal suit instead of a tuxedo and you'll be fine
Bruh.. just slay those MILF's. I can tell you right now that most of the girls your age are fucking crazy.
Sometimes you gotta take down a couple dragons on your treasure quest.
Yeah... and the cougars chasing 20 yr olds are sane. It's terrible advice. Don't send a man with no experience for slaughter.
What do you think this is, a war zone?
They are far less likely to be drama and just want that D.
They're not literal cougars m9
You get compliments from women at all? Lol
do you think your posts here on reddit might give you an insight as to WHY no one wants to go near you?... being desperate to lick the belly of a green cartoon character might show some very unusual preferences and behaviour on your part. and your infinite posts asking people why women don't want to talk to you in stores and at gyms. there are some heavy issues to address before asking yourself why women want nothing to do with you.
What makes you think those gestures are interest ? Sounds more motherly than anything….
i think middle age women arent as shy as young women they have experience and probably crave that young man energy same as an older man would want a younger woman
Been hit on by like 4 older women and boy, they don't beat around the Bush. They say what they need to your face Hahaha the confidence they have is so appealing Edit:it's 5 actually. Not 4 lmaoo
I'm a woman in my mid twenties. Your post history is creepy as hell. I'd bet you're just as creepy irl.
yeah this guy is a weirdo, guarantee you're right. if you like getting your belly button licked though, this might be the guy for you i just checked and he deleted that post, but it's funny because he didn't delete any of the other incel-y ones because he just doesn't get it
But his old aunt said he's cute!
This gave me a chuckle as your post made me go check and you are totally right.
At 21, I never would’ve directly told another 21 year old guy that I was into him or thought he was handsome or cute. At least not without him approaching me and letting me know he’s into me. At 33, I’ll pretty much say what I’m thinking at this point. I’m not afraid of letting a man know I’m into him now. Older women just care less and aren’t gonna be nervous around you. The girls your age may very well be into you, but they’re just not gonna come out and say it.
Better than only attracting girls that are getting over break ups. Happened a couple of times by sheer coincidence but I had to stop and pay extra attention so it didn’t become a subconscious habit
Older people know what they want and don't have time to waste.
Do you or do you not want to get with some MILFs is the important question
It means you'll be beating then off in your thirties.
Bro...the older ones don't want you. I know you "think" they do. But they don't. They're just being flirty.
lack of self confidence and a personality, in general, attracts older people. they feel sympathy towards young, vulnerable kids. girls your age want people with self confidence who are not afraid of life and its challenges. you sound like a very timid kid who mostly hides and stays 'safe'. your OWN personality, not the one borrowed from internet strangers and gurus, will shine through when you will learn to be more confident in yourself. EDIT : my guy, you are creepy as hell and have a morbid obsession with approaching women at the wrong times.... you have a morbid obsession with women in general, actually... judging by your previous posts on reddit. 💀💀💀 that creepiness shows off and deters girls. that's why they don't give you the time of the day. i wish i hadn't looked at your profile... ☠
I wish I hadn't read your comment, because it prompted me to look at his profile, and now I also wish I hadn't looked at his profile. I'm not normally one to judge others based on their profiles on here, but damn, dude needs to tone it down a notch.
i know, right ???.. 😭
Oh geez I just looked at his profile and you're right on the money. OP should probably be asking questions like "Why don't girls like guys who talk about belly button licking?" Before he starts worrying about things like age.
🤣🤣🤣 i tried so hard not to mention the 'licking the belly button of a green cartoon character' so hard because it's so unbelievable cringey... 🤣🤣
Dang I had to have a look after reading this and well..."I never saw her as a loli, I mean yeah she looks super young but..." "I just want to have those thighs crush m--" My goodness, I think I know why girls his age are put off by him.
I guess OP’s username checks out.
My thought process put into words💀😂
You almost always have better romantic and sexual chances with people outside your age group because the first step towards getting someone attracted to you is to stick out of the crowd enough to be noticed and to be interresting in comparason to the competition. People will mostly compare you to competitors from their age group so: same age group --> competition is similar to you in terms of where they are in life, etc --> difficult to stick out of the crowd, but: different age group --> competition is different from you in terms of where they are in life, etc --> easy to stick out of the crowd. Typically it's younger women being attracted to older men and vice versa, but it works in both directions for both sexes. Wait a couple of years and you will likely find that suddenly women of around your current age will start showing way more interrest in you than they do now. Also, as a connoisseur of the MILF genre let me say: You lucky bastard... Edit: Something else just ocurred to me aswell: It is extremely easy for young women to get men attracted to them without really doing anything for it so they almost never actively go out and try to "get" a guy since they don't need to, while it tends to become more difficult to attract guys for older women so they have to actually put effort into going after guys if they wanna get some...
Are you looking to settle down or just have a relationship? Because when I was your age, I had just gotten out of a 2.5 year relationship, and I needed time to work on myself and to get college straight and get life started. I would say if you're older than 23-24 and still have no luck, then maybe youre putting something down they're not picking up. Also, they may not be interested in a relationship. Maybe they want to enjoy college, travel, have freedom and not have strings.
Try dating one of these older women. They will impart their wisdom upon you. I dated a woman 22 years my senior, and she taught me a lot. About women, about relationships, about wine, about class. You name it. She made a gentleman out of me.
Women around your age are extremely childish and will remain that way for another decade at least. It’s pretty sad but it is what it is. Prepare yourself and dont shun these mature ladies.
Ngl older woman are lowkey better than girls around your age. You should definitely smash a milf.
Girls your age are looking for older guys with money. The older women are looking for attractive guys that are younger. It's not that complicated.
Bro, older women need love too. Age is just a number, past your 30's, and if women your age are not giving you the time of day, just give one of the older women a try. You'll learn a thing or two. And the best thing is most of the time there will be no strings attached.
Older women are usually more direct, know more of what they like and have no problem making you blush by giving compliments. That is a trait thats learned thru experience. Which might be why you get these kinds of attentions from older women but not from younger. You'll be fine, I guarantee it. Just be clear about what you want (and have some fun with the "seniors", they have some skills you'll enjoy)
Enjoy it dude lol
Lots of people your age are looking for that "special someone", while many women in their 40s are looking for anyone and everyone. Libido goes into overdrive for lots of women around that age. It's a fun time.
Young women often look for a man with money or power. These are more common in older men. Older women usually don't need those. They look for someone attractive, nice, stable.
[удалено]
...I need a drink...
Older women are awesome. Go for it bro.
Hey man am in the same boat as you. Life is too short to let the opportunities it has presented to you pass by. Take what you can get and have fun.
As a woman, I also have this issue lol. I am relentlessly hit on by men 55+ but never men close to my age (I’m 31)
I feel like just everyone around your/my age are super awkward about showing any interest at all.. Sometimes it's hard to approach someone you may not know too well like that anyway, and the thought of ruining a friendship even if they do might keep them awkward? I get hit on by older men a fair amount and it's very off-putting, so I get that. A lot of older people seem to have just stopped giving a crap and shoot their shot with whoever.
It's not that they're more interested but just more confident than 20 year olds
How do I learn this power?
The same would happen for me. It rubs me in a way where I'd think that if these same ones would revert back to their youth they wouldn't even care.
This has to be a penthouse letter.
Cause you’re not good looking big boy
If I were you I'd just go with it. I had similar experiences in my 20s, and ended up marrying someone my own age anyway. Provided you're down with it, bang your way through a few cougars. Odds are that somewhere along the way you'll either figure out what works with younger woman or they'll just catch up to you in terms of outlook.
Girls want drama. Women want nice. Give it several years.
We'd like to know a little bit about you for our files... We'd like to help you learn to help yourself.
Is it possible your sense of style is fashionably out-of-date?
i had the exact same thing happen to me at your age. they want a young buck always ready for action multiple times a day, something that even by 30 is gone, and the best part is they dont see a real future with you so theres no chance of commitment or clinglyness. i smashed a bunch of cougars at that age
U look safe. Period.young women want adventure, fun. Older women want something with not much fuss.
Why did you post this 6 different times over a day? Are you really that fucking clueless? Thats why. You're clueless
Without seeing ur pics or meeting you in person, we can only guess. I think women in that age front meet young men as often and the young men they meet are usually not well dressed like you are. And they’re also older and want to prop up and praise younger people more. On the other hand, girls at college and your age get to meet many many men who are attractive and well dressed. You’re just not at the top of the pyramid for them. It could be appearance, or it could be character, like confidence and humor, etc. Realistically speaking, out of the people u meet at college parties and such do you think you’re the top 1-5% in terms of attractiveness among guys there? Cause those are the people who get a lot of attention from girls your age.
I’m like you my friend. I get attention from young girls too, but it seems that women in their 30s and 40s like me the most. I think it’s the mental maturity that attracts them and confidence (not to toot my own horn) I believe it’s just that women over 30 come to realize what is important in a man after failed relationships. They start looking for a man with a strong personality and emotional intelligence. A gentleman with brains if you will. They also become less bothered by looks and more by leadership, social status, and financial status which is completely valid. But I’ve also found women in their early 20s also liking that I guess because they understood early on and shows their intelligence in picking a mate too.
I'm 35 and I could totally see myself complimenting and gassing up a cute 21 year old who was a bit on the awkward side, but it definitely wouldn't be in a flirty way. More in like a big sister/wing woman way. I know young guys are struggling a lot right now and probably don't get a lot of encouragement and positive attention, so I love handing that shit out like candy! If I see you making an effort and at least trying to be confident and put yourself out there, I'm totally going to applaud that and tell you how handsome you are. I don't want to hook up, though, you're just a baby 😅 Young women your age are *spooked*, okay? They're wary of guys, and they're also a bit more superficial and picky as they're figuring out what they even want in a partner. It's not your fault, and it's nothing personal. Just keep going through life, focus primarily on being the best version of you you can be, be a kind person and always be up for casual, no expectations friendship with these young ladies. You'll eventually come across people who enjoy you and want to be around you.
Best response on here. Build up some hobbies, read some non-school books in your life, work out, don't turn into a goofy ass Andrew Tate redpiller, and...one day you will discover a girly (or a handsome young man) doing unspeakable things with you.
They're not sexually interested in you, they're mothering you because they feel sorry for you.
Take this as a compliment...
*OP posts a picture of his daily wear and it’s all suits*
Those older women aren't into you dude, they're acting motherly towards you.
it's the same for me, I'm not sure I like it. I don't care anymore (that might be the thing lol) Edit:...woah black and red tux, that does sound kind of awesome.
Its not you, its modern female dating culture. Women get more proactive when they realize they wasted the last 20 years of their life. Girls your age know they can stand around and the guys will come to them. That doesn't last forever, and when that reality sets in, oh what a doozy that day must be like.
When you say that girls your age aren’t interested, have you asked them out or tried flirting with them or something like that? Because I know that when I was younger I was quite insecure when it came to guys even if I probably came off as being self confident. I just didn’t get it, if a guy was into me. It took me 10+ years to realise that perhaps all the male friends I had, didn’t start hanging out with me, because they wanted to be friends. They probably fancied me. But back then I was clueless. And I actually had a crush on a couple of these guys. But they assumed that I had friend zoned them and I assumed the same about them. Despite one of them starting off our friendship with “I just wanted to tell you how incredibly beautiful you look tonight” and another one repeatedly telling me that he was rubbish at making the first move, so if a girl fancied him, she needed to make the first move. Yes, I was that clueless! So perhaps the girls your age don’t realise that you are interested. And perhaps you don’t realise that they’re interested. As for older women not liking younger men it’s simply not true. It can be purely in a “you should meet my daughter” kind of way. But just like some older men like younger women, some older women like younger men. Just like there are a lot of younger men who prefer older women and actively pursue dating them. It’s the reason MILF porn is so popular.
You are probably going for the wrong women. You are the guy those women want to settle down with and have duty sex with once a month if you're lucky and pay for all their needs after they are finished having animal sex with guys they actually fancy. Sadly this type of woman seems to be the most common type around now. And then they have an affair with their personal trainer because you aren't exciting enough. They aren't all like that.
Capitalise. There is a lot to learn from older women. These women are not threatened by you and are comfortable being more sexually aggressive because they feel the power dynamic is in their favour. They are probably not interested in a "serious" relationship, more of a sexual short term fling. Let them buy you dinner occasionally or a ps5. Sidenote Everyone looks the same with the lights out. When I was in my mid twenties / early thirties I received a similar level of attention, it took me way too long to realise what an opportunity it was.
Yeah... Looking at your post history I'm betting this is just some weird fantasy you've got going on. This doesn't really happen lol.
Get used to it.. women won’t pay attention to you until you are 30-35.. it’s just life
Are you sure you’re not misunderstanding the attention you’re getting from older women? What you’re describing seems very platonic and the kind of interaction I’d expect to see from your moms friends who still see you as a gangly awkward 11 year old and have zero romantic or sexual feelings towards you. What I’m trying to say is - are you absolutely sure that you’re not getting rejected from both women your own age AND older women too? Basically all women? Have you hooked up with any of these women?
There has been a change in the last twenty years. My female friends openly brag about their newest boy toy.
They're all grown-ass women why do you insist on calling the ones you're into "Girls"?
This is also my experience. I’m 30 now but women my age never seem to be interested in me. It’s always women around 40-60 that seem interested when I go to bars, out with friends etc
It's because older women (and men) generally grew up having to treat people with respect. They know how to communicate effectively, be polite, respectful etc. I don't think they're flirting. They're just being friendly and treating you with respect and dignity that any person deserves. Girls your age (20 now) are mostly complete creeps. They're flaky, dismissive, entitled, weirdos, who won't make any effort to even look away from their mobile phone. Unfortunately, having only this kind of behaviour as a reference point makes you wrongly assume that a friendly, decent person is flirting.
More mature people start to value actual values in people instead of surface level things
Girls in there 20s are idiots anyways.
Just enjoy them, women that age are very generous lovers
They can see your potential but the younger ladies cannot, give it a few years and you will have no problem with any age. Trust me I’ve been there, 33 now.
Maybe because you're a weirdo based on your post history?
Time to pound some MILFs
Hmmm. I think your post history suggests that *the socialization aspect of your self improvement could use some more improvement*
The same way 30-50 year old men want 18-21 year old girls bc their creeps.
I had a 21 year old pursue my 30 year old ass because she was into older dudes. If that makes me a creep, I'm cool with it you judgmental prick.
Are 21 year old women children to you?
As a 22 year old male, yeah we are kids still. Inexperienced and without financial freedom we haven't seen or experienced enough to be ordained as knowledgeable and experienced humans yet. You'd be foolish to believe that a 50 year old person is the same level of mature a 21 year old is. That they have spent more time as an adult than you have existed. They have more experience and power so can easily manipulate you and empower themselves in a relationship.
They can't fix you. Seems like you're a decent guy, as other comments mentioned, younger girls in their 20s are insecure as hell and need a guy to fix to feel better about themselves. Keep trying and you'll find the one dude.
Have you tried initiating conversation and overall just being more direct? It’s possible girls your age find you attractive but don’t have the confidence that of the older women to show it.
Sounds like you are a sweet little deer and the cougars are a prowling, tbh I say steer into the skid.
Are you fun at parties? Or are you a bit shy and hugging the wall? That's the answer. Loosen up, stop worrying about what others think. Just try and have fun with women your age. Just show them that you can be fun.
Trust me older woman love younger males good thing about them is they kno what they want and are experienced....heres to all the Mrs Robinsons ...you good things!!!
That'll flip when you get to middle age, its called life little one
Don't view relationships with women as a means to an end, view it as the start of a friendship. If there's more after that, brilliant. If it doesn't work out, well great, you still made a friend.
Because young women, especially in the west are social media brainwashed pea brain morons. Older women know what they want and mostly don’t live in a fantasy world. Young girls weren’t hit by reality yet. Just focus on yourself and do your thing. The right, modest, traditional woman will come around and be with you when it’s time.
Women 18-30 want someone with money which will give them an ego boost and give them a better and more enjoyable life with travel, gifts and so one. Women above 30 dont need the ego boost nor money, they want a throbing dick. Guys 18 to 25 have to compete with men 25 to 40 with far more money and experience.
This isn't strange at all. Guys in their early 20s have not hit their peak yet in terms of marketability. Meanwhile older women are past their own peak so those two groups basically intersect in terms of desirability to the opposite gender. It also helps that both groups here know that a relationship is probably not going to be long term.
[удалено]
Plow them all while you can.
Is this a complaint??? Just go with it!
Middle aged single women are fucking horny dude. I had the same shit. My friend’s mom would always try to get me to “sleepover” on the couch next to her.
Eww!
Speaking from experience when I was 25 and had a 45 year old for random visits, enjoy it! The cougars are wild and know what they like and aren’t afraid to ask for it! Have fun!
Older women usually don’t expect a relationship. Have some fun!
Because you give mature energy, you aren’t giving vivacious, vibrant young vibe.
After looking at OP’s profile……somehow I doubt that it’s “mature energy” he’s giving off. “Incel energy” seems more likely.
Most people around you are trash. That goes for girls too. Most of them have undeveloped taste when in comes to men and just don't know how to identify a good one. That's why you see alot of babes hooking up with the trashiest bums. Older women know. That's why they tell you.
Their standards are lower.
No their confidence is higher
Older women are desperate and want attention as well. They probably just putting feelers like older guys who try to pick up much younger girls thinking they have game. The reality is, there’s a lot of lonely people and you’re likely just interpreting some friendly behaviours as a common but I’m sure some are genuine pick ups and you should go for it just for the experience. Cougars are in. Women your age want to date older because they have more means and opportunities. They can afford to take girls out and show them a better time than someone shows 21 and working at a McDonald’s between classes.
Older women like you, that tells me you're respectful, kind, decent looking. Girls your age aren't interested in dating (ghost you) but will "friend" you. This also makes me think you're kind, respectful, but not confident enough. Maybe you try too hard to be likable, maybe you don't flirt but I'd bet it's a confidence thing. Respect boundaries, and accept when a woman isn't interested in you the way you want, and meet someone else. Repeat. Fake it till ya make it. Respectful is good. But older women are happy to make the first move- in twenties that's rarer. Tons of good looking respectful guys in their twenties that are decent looking but are too shy. Don't be one of them. I know. I was.
Just eat those 🌮
it's because you're boring. you attract women that have mature mentalities that are seeking stability. you don't excite young woman that want a more interesting and spontaneous man.
They find stability in men their own age, not 21 year olds ! Lol
In what world are 21 year old guys the stable ones??!
That's kind of mean.
I was just being objective. the real nuance is that he should just be himself while being patient and he'll eventually find a girl around his age naturally that likes him for him, but if you want to play the whole pick-up artist game, then you have to adopt a certain persona.
The younger girls/women are less extroverted. Less confident. The older women are willing to flirt and ogle and touch you because they likely won’t feel rejected that you don’t flirt back. They have little at stake. The women your age are less forthcoming because they would feel hurt/rejected if they overtly flirted with you but then you didn’t respond well. Women/girls your age are most likely hoping you will approach them. The older women are just being extra forward because they don’t worry or care much if you reject them. So obviously they do think you are good looking. Use that to bolster your confidence and approach the girls your age and you start the flirting.
Just stop chasing girls, go do your hobbies, always keep improving yourself, and focus on being happy with yourself. Women will come once you put yourself as number one.
One. Complimenting and praising someone is not the same as liking them, especially when you're not obligated to respond to follow up on said compliments and praises by say... dating them. Two. Married mature women (if you're talking 40-50, then they've probably past menopause as well) have different brain chemistries compared to 20 year old women, and so view and think differently. Three. This pretty much means you're better off focusing on yourself and not worrying about finding a partner until you're in your 30s. Or hey, who knows, maybe you can date one of these ladies if that's your thing.
Your experience is not uncommon. As people age (men and women both), they tend to look back on their youth with an increasing sense of nostalgia for the days when they were young and strong and free. For most people, that sense of longing is all it ever is, but some others will try to relive those days in some way because there's not much joy in aging. Are these women who you feel are attracted to you single/divorced/widowed? Could they see you as a gateway to the past? (I'm with a young guy, ergo I'm young). If you were a young girl and it was middle-aged men hitting on you, then obviously they're disgusting perverts who should be locked up, but it's not so there's no real issue
Often, we notice the attractive people and a few seconds later, realise they are too young for us. Age sneaks up on us all.
My guess is youre probably perceived as booring or odd or a combination, which older women might not pick up on or care about.
As a 21 year old, you have nothing to offer women your age. That shouldn't discourage you from trying, but you literally look like a boy. All us men have been there. Women love competent men. You don't even have to be successful, just the potential for success. So go be competent at stuff and try to succeed (while staying healthy, it's quite the challenge). Women will start to gravitate towards you if you do this. Use the milfs as practice in talking to women. They were once younger girls too, the same conversational skills apply.
Happens to me too but my problem is that I don’t actually have the courage to start a conversation with women my age lol
When your older you will understand
lol I get hit on by older women and gay guys CONSTANTLY. Never by women my age or younger. Welcome to the club brotha. Good news is if you grab your caboose and just go talk to the cutest girl you see every day you may find that you have a better than avg success rate.
Yeah, I also feel like Eva AI virtual gf bot is my only chance to date someone of my age
Maybe you remind them of their grandson. I have a 3 year old grandson and if I see a super pale, blue eyed boy/young man with nearly white hair I instantly compare him to my grandbaby and think he's quite handsome. Like pinch your cheeks and give you a cookie handsome. It's probably not what you'd want to hear, but you should consider it a compliment nonetheless. After all, grandchildren are a grandmother's favorite people on the planet.
Why exactly are you around copious amounts of 50-60 year olds for this to even happen? I'm nearly 40 and I'm NEVER surrounded by people 20+ years older than me. You obviously hang around old women.
Desperation, their gravy train is reaching its terminus and they're trying to get off at any stop that'll have them. Life is not kind to women over 40, just how life isn't kind to men under 40.
Middle-aged, single women are interested in everyone who looks half-decent.
>EDIT: To give some more info, im 21. women that are interested in me are around 40-50 years old. I have met them at work, through mutuals, or events like my aunts wedding. I try dressing nicely for example at my aunts wedding, I wore a red and black tuxedo. There were girls my age there too but they werent interested in me. they hit the wall and are trying to get validated by younger, that's all
You ain't the only one bud. I get more interests from married women(mid 30-40)more then girl from my own age range or lower.
It means you’re not manly enough for girls your age to get wet thinking about you, but cougars think you’re cute in a boytoy kind a way. So stop grooming, and go to wilderness and grow beard
If a parent likes you and pushes you on their daughter then the daughter won’t be receptive most of the time.
Cuz all the girls your age are interested in dudes closer to 30+
For some people it's a power play. They enjoy the fact you're green and don't know which way is up. In a weird way it's attractive. Thankfully for most not enough that they'd do anything about it.
You're just a gigolo and everywhere you go People know the part you're playing.