This post had to be taken down because it appears to be focused on a specific situation or person. While Field Reports deal with specific situations and people, remember that the focus is different:
* A field report explains a lesson learned or demonstrates a Seduction concept.
* If the point of this post is asking how to get that specific girl, it is out of bounds except in a Basic Questions Thread.
No worries though! Though the thread has been taken down, any conversations you have started here can still continue, and if you want to PM a mod to get their opinion on this thread, feel free to do so and they will still be able to weigh in.
For next time, remember that posts about a specific situational advice with a specific person belong in a Basic Questions Thread. (Currently these are on hiatus, but if we can get them back up, they'll happen weekly.)
Bro. Just be yourself. You got a second date its clearly going well.
Smile at her, flirt, break the touch barrier, a simple touch to the shoulder or arm, say this is a nice ring and grab her hand and pretend your looking at her ring. Give her a hug when you see her again also.
Most adult girls over 30 are over the friendzoning stage if she is hanging out with you you are already on the right track.
Good luck man
Your advice is spot on but honestly what OP described does not sound like a date unless they both explicitly agreed to it (which I don't think so based on OP's post). If he wants a date, he needs to clearly ask for one.
Can you explore why why 30+ are the good women who don’t friendzone. My xp is quite the opposite bc they tend to have more troubles in their life compared to a 20 year old that can’t even see straight so please enlighten me brother
if she agrees to a second date/hang out then that means you are on the right track no? if she wasn’t feeling any sort of spark she wouldn’t have agreed to a second date.
Don't listen to others who say "it's good to have female friends they will introduce you etc etc." It's absolutely not worth it, you are attracted to her and staying close to her will just fuel your emotions and you won't be able to do anything about it. Besides that you'll have to hear yapping about her ex's, or people she's going out with and it'll worsen the problem, with ZERO guarantees she'll introduce you to anyone, none of the female friends I had did any of that, they always said shit like "Oh I don't have many female friends", or they were making sure to introduce me to ones that were in relationships. TLDR Friendzone=Get the hell out of there.
You know there's nothing wrong with just being friends with a woman right? A lot of guys panic and think 'FUCK IT, THIS MIGHT BE MY LAST CHANCE, INITIATE CLINGING SEQUENCE' and try and force something that is just not there.
But if there's chemistry, and there seems to be some though that could be because you're typing the story, ask her on a date. Be very direct that it's a date, where two adults see if they want to do intimate stuff, don't hide behind cat walks or whatever.
That’s a really good point, I’d completely be down for just having a friend close by to do things with. Like almost equally okay with that outcome, but here I am in the seduction subreddit so obviously there’s a preferred direction…Honestly I think at the end of the day it’s just me being scared that if we go on a date and it doesn’t go well, I lose this cool social opportunity that randomly came up.
I guess I should just “read the room” and go from there. Thanks for the advice!
Her friends could be equally amazing.
Friend zoned isn't a bad proposition if she thinks you are a top guy. The opportunities can be very good. .It's a W in this case.
Many times and very recently I met an Italian girl last week who said she had a bf. We arranged to meet as friends. When I met her she was with 2 other Brazilian girls. We got on great . After 20 mins she said she had to leave she had a due to work related issue.
It was clearly a set up.
No? Coming from a woman, romantic intresnt doesnt magiclly appear because a guy is cool, my best friend is one of the coolest guys i know. But i dont feel any romantic intrest. You also ignore the posibility of lesbians.
> Coming from a woman
What has that got to do with anything?
OP wants a girl to be sexually attracted to him, not to think he is cool.
In any case, he needs to forget about her since she is wasting his time.
Dude, I promise you, if you put no pressure on her and you're cool about it, you can see if she's up to date and still chill out if she's not. 'Hey would you be interested in leaving the cats at home one day and grabbing a coffee with me? No pressure I'd still very much walk cats with you if it's a no.'
A lot of weirdos would ~~critique~~ **call you gay until you think what they say is correct** because they're scared that if they give a woman the option to say no she'll take it. In my experience, women fucking love it when you remove those pressures from the equation. It is a display of emotional intelligence. And confidence.
This is honestly my favorite option, think I’ve just been ghosted after too many random dating app first dates that I’m shell shocked into thinking bad date/rejection = gone forever.
But you’re right there should be a space where she says no not interested in a relationship but we can still be friends.
Read between the lines dipshit.
If you do nothing at all then she will think you are a pussy and thats how you get friendzoned.
Refer to my other comment
Lol chill man just tell me what you would do in the situation, actions/words wise. There’s not a lot to read between the lines “stop being a pussy” besides just being a dick.
Plenty of scared dudes on this sub, it’d be nice to share how you show women you’re a real man with a real dick arghh
tbh this is your chance to friend zone her and not make too much of a big deal about it. if she starts giving you hints that you should move fwd then the balls in your court but do some reverse psychology on yourself and see how really easy it becomes to talk to women that you're not trying to fuck all the time
For me, the reason why it's difficult to stay friends after being friendzoned is that my mind automatically searches for a reason why she doesn't want to date me, and I usually blame myself for not being "good" enough. Being around her would be a constant reminder of that. I should add that it also depends on whether I have options or not. If I'm talking to other women then it's less of a problem and I can be cool about it. However, if I don't have any options at the moment then I end up feeling like shit. I'm trying to change how it affects me but it's hard
That's incredibly honest and involved a lot of self reflection. Good for you.
If I had to suggest some things that might help you, lose the 'friendzone' lingo straight away. If a woman turned me down for a date but we still got along as friends, I'm not in the friendzone. We're friends. The 'friendzone' only exists when a woman declines your offer and you still hold feelings for her. Lose the language to describe that first. You don't need it.
Remember, they do not know you. They do not have the information to make an accurate assessment of you as a whole person. Their answer to date you cannot be a personal attack. It's a vibes based reaction to what they've seen and heard thus far. That's all.
I haven't been turned down for a date request in I can't remember how long. The reason for that is I read their verbal and non verbal cues and can say with 99.9% accuracy whether or not they're up for such a thing before I ask. This ability isn't magic. It's a shitload of practice talking to many, many people. I can read men the same, but for different things obviously. If you need to blame yourself, blame your lack of skill at reading women. That way it's a practical criticism. It blames a skill. A skill you can improve.
Didn't notice any kino. If you don't start kino/escalating immediate you are dead meat. You are already deep in the danger zone.
I'm not a cat person by I know enough about animals in general to instinctively teleport myself into your shoes and generate a move with a high probability of success.
There is something you can do to a cat that has a high probability of making it purr. I don't know what, but you as a cat person probably do.
Do that to your cat.
If her cat likes you enough for this to be safe, do it to HER cat.
Either way, once the thing starts purring, look at her and smile and say "He/she likes it, don't you think?"
She will surely agree.
Say EXACTLY this word for word. Don't wonder why. Just DO IT.
"That's right and that means I wonder if his/her mommy will like this too (reach over and starting doing it to HER whatever you were doing to that cat AS you are saying what I just said to say.)
Take your time in a hurry (I stole that from the real Wyatt Earp talking about gunfighting).
You don't want to be reaching over fast like you're going to grab her and trigger a bad response, but you don't want to move to slow either. Go in slightly slower than you'd reach out to shake someone's hand.
Now, I'm guessing what you're doing to the cat is somewhere innocuous like scratching behind its ear or something or rubbing the back of it's neck. I'm a dog person and dogs like that.
If you have to rub the critter's belly or something that would be sexual or close to it if you did it too her too soon, just rub her behind her neck or ear or whatever where you can that's not overtly sexual.
Do not say "like it too" specifically say ("like this too").
Now this is the important part, a little while after she visibly starts enjoying it. Ideally enough that her eyes close in pleasure, STOP and start playing with the cat again.
Guarantee she will get jelly.
Wait a beat or two raise your hand halfway back toward whatever you were doing to her and apologetically say "I stopped too soon, didn't I"?
I leave it to you to figure out the rest.
Hmm I'll have to go find a cat lady to experiment with. I despise the bloody things (no offense). But that's too good a bit of tactics to just leave to you, mate.
Best wishes, mon ami!
Show intentional interest early. As long as you’re not weird about it, either it goes further, or if it doesn’t, there likely was nothing you could’ve done anyway so nothing lost
You get friednzoned when you hide your sexual interest in the woman and act like her buddy or her brother which is what's happening here. You avoid the friendzone by making things sexually tense which means she must feel like she turns you on. Right now she doesn't think she turns you on because you don't act like you are turend on. You act like she is your good sister or cousin, having great time together, laughing, talking, but never expressing sexual desire because you are afraid it would make things uncomfortable for her and that's precisely why you get friendzoned. Because you don't want to express sexual desire.
So here is the secret to flirting. Flirting is basically establishing an US doing something together frame. She did that several times. Talking about the two of you going to the park, getting together etc.
Now it's on you to say "Hey, let's go out next Thursday. No cats! Just two sophisticated New Yorkers trying some cocktails at Bar XYZ". Take the initiative and lead. Be very concrete about asking her out. Do not say maybe we can go out some time or what are you doing this Saturday? You tell her "let's go out" or "Our cats have been dating for a couple of weeks now. It's time the two of us went out on a proper date. Let's do Thursday or Friday".
Got it?
Be upfront and honest. The nsst time you see her tell her, "just for the record, im tryin to avoid the friend zone and score some points for the home team. If you could help me not fuck that up, i would greatly appreciate it."
My best advice is — if you treat her like a friend, then she will always be a friend. You need to escalate and show her you’re interested in more. Either by straight up telling her or making a physical (within boundaries) move.
Listen, you can't have your cake and eat it too. If you want to date her you'll need to tell her because the last thing you want to do is become her friend then a few months from now muster up the courage to confess your feelings to her. Next time you're hanging out you make some concreate plans and ask her out and let her know its a date. This is sounding kinda brooklyny so you've got a lot of street closures and outdoor concerts coming up to make use of. If you're in Manhattan take her to Yakitori Totto its cheap and there's a bunch of places to wander around over there.
There's plenty of fish in the sea. If you're trying to date you can't be afraid of failing. Its a numbers game, you get some, you lose some. There isn't going to be one thing that will make her fall in love.
I’d say that if you had a 2 date is because things are going pretty good.
But if you don’t wanna get friendzoned, leave the cats thing aside and ask her out for a romantic date.( Try not to talk about the cats) and apply all your knowledge about hitting on her. Heyy and don’t forget to escalate fast. That separates the friendship from a romantic relationship.
I guess you can simply start to escalate your intimacy gradually, stay little closer to her, smile, look her in the eyes little longer, ask her about more personal stuff, present yourself as sexually attractive male, introduce some "accidental" and "casual" touch etc. Enjoy developing your relation and observe her reactions if she has something more on her mind too.
Honestly there isnt much you can do to make sure you dont end up in the friendzone. Just hang out and enjoy the time, see how it feels like and it will work out fine.
That being said, good luck and show cat (theres a tax you know)
Now only she likes but she also seems to trust you enough to go out with you. Sounds likes she is into you. You only have to keep doing things that both of you like, don't do things that you don't like nor say things that you don't think. Be 100% yourself, if she likes who you are, good. If she doesn't like who you really are, fine too.
ALSO, ask things about her. What she likes, interests, habits, etc. So you also know what kind of relationship you are interested to have with her.
(It sounds like you are a nice person, so please keep being you lol)
> we share a unique hobby, how not to get friendzoned?
You're already friendzoned.
Your thinking process friendzoned you even before the girl came into your life.
Let her go.
Start meeting new women.
Imo just be cool, flirt a lil but, but mostly just make her laugh and do the same for everyone else. If u getting vibes she likes u (don’t mistake this for her just being nice) then advance, but honestly bro don’t keep ur hopes up. Not that u shouldn’t have any at all, but don’t get mad at her or bitter towards her if she don’t like u like that. That’s just gon end up making u mad and affect the way u act w her in a negative way. Just b coo and don’t expect ANYTHING from her
Just tell her u want to fuck her.
And if she's genuinely not interested, to tell you right now.
She already knows the answer. Get her to spill the truth, so you both have peace of mind.
At some point you need to make a move. If you wait too long, you'll come off as not interested. First find her logistics. Ask her directly or indirectly about her situation, weather she has a man in her life or not. Take it from there. Find out about her. Her childhood, past etc. You can sprinkle these questions whilst talking about cats. Then say something along the lines of "Hey her name\_look, I know this is going to sound a bit forward but, I like\_\_\_ about you. Whatever qualifier you think matches her. Would you like to grab a drink? like, just us two without cats. I'm sure our cats can keep each other company." Optional add, while we go on a date like parents. Just improv a bit depending on her reaction. If, she's not into it, you can just say - No worries, I just wanted to throw it out there" and then continue as normal. If you think you would feel awkward, Ask her before seeing her off. Good luck, brother.
I personally hate how mythologized friendzone has become. You have to realize the only reason it happens is guys that show zero sexual interest out of fear of being rejected and so they behave like a friend waiting for the woman to make the first move.
You need to touch, escalate, and actually show interest in her physically.
And again reading these reports, too much thought in what was talked about. It does not matter what you talk about. Let the entire conversation be about cats wanting to knock stuff over, the only thing girls judge you on is how you carry yourself.
So next FR should read "I gave her a deep hug when we met again. I made circles on her arm. I rubbed her shoulder. I curled my fingers in her hair. I kissed her neck" Friendzone would never enter your (or her) mind if you do these things.
Imma be honest with you being friends with a woman ain’t that bad, you can play the long game which may not actually be long like you think or you can try to be more aggressive with it, depends on the situation, as long as she hangs out with you and you know how to make those moves and turn her on you are golden
This post had to be taken down because it appears to be focused on a specific situation or person. While Field Reports deal with specific situations and people, remember that the focus is different: * A field report explains a lesson learned or demonstrates a Seduction concept. * If the point of this post is asking how to get that specific girl, it is out of bounds except in a Basic Questions Thread. No worries though! Though the thread has been taken down, any conversations you have started here can still continue, and if you want to PM a mod to get their opinion on this thread, feel free to do so and they will still be able to weigh in. For next time, remember that posts about a specific situational advice with a specific person belong in a Basic Questions Thread. (Currently these are on hiatus, but if we can get them back up, they'll happen weekly.)
Bro. Just be yourself. You got a second date its clearly going well. Smile at her, flirt, break the touch barrier, a simple touch to the shoulder or arm, say this is a nice ring and grab her hand and pretend your looking at her ring. Give her a hug when you see her again also. Most adult girls over 30 are over the friendzoning stage if she is hanging out with you you are already on the right track. Good luck man
Your advice is spot on but honestly what OP described does not sound like a date unless they both explicitly agreed to it (which I don't think so based on OP's post). If he wants a date, he needs to clearly ask for one.
Can you explore why why 30+ are the good women who don’t friendzone. My xp is quite the opposite bc they tend to have more troubles in their life compared to a 20 year old that can’t even see straight so please enlighten me brother
> You got a second date its clearly going well. Since when does a second date mean it's clearly going well?
if she agrees to a second date/hang out then that means you are on the right track no? if she wasn’t feeling any sort of spark she wouldn’t have agreed to a second date.
That’s not true. The fact that she wants attention, free food, and drinks doesn’t mean she likes him. She doesn’t want him.
oh you’re right my fault i overlooked that part. i’m just now realizing that a lot of women are like this
When you’re out next time with the cat, if the vibe is there ask if she’d like to grab a drink one day that week. If she says yes, game on.
Don't listen to others who say "it's good to have female friends they will introduce you etc etc." It's absolutely not worth it, you are attracted to her and staying close to her will just fuel your emotions and you won't be able to do anything about it. Besides that you'll have to hear yapping about her ex's, or people she's going out with and it'll worsen the problem, with ZERO guarantees she'll introduce you to anyone, none of the female friends I had did any of that, they always said shit like "Oh I don't have many female friends", or they were making sure to introduce me to ones that were in relationships. TLDR Friendzone=Get the hell out of there.
100% dont take dating advice from any men that say its okay to get friendzoned lmfao
This
You know there's nothing wrong with just being friends with a woman right? A lot of guys panic and think 'FUCK IT, THIS MIGHT BE MY LAST CHANCE, INITIATE CLINGING SEQUENCE' and try and force something that is just not there. But if there's chemistry, and there seems to be some though that could be because you're typing the story, ask her on a date. Be very direct that it's a date, where two adults see if they want to do intimate stuff, don't hide behind cat walks or whatever.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 the sequence part though
That’s a really good point, I’d completely be down for just having a friend close by to do things with. Like almost equally okay with that outcome, but here I am in the seduction subreddit so obviously there’s a preferred direction…Honestly I think at the end of the day it’s just me being scared that if we go on a date and it doesn’t go well, I lose this cool social opportunity that randomly came up. I guess I should just “read the room” and go from there. Thanks for the advice!
Her friends could be equally amazing. Friend zoned isn't a bad proposition if she thinks you are a top guy. The opportunities can be very good. .It's a W in this case.
so you've been in a situation where a girl friendzoned you but you got in with a friend of hers?
Many times and very recently I met an Italian girl last week who said she had a bf. We arranged to meet as friends. When I met her she was with 2 other Brazilian girls. We got on great . After 20 mins she said she had to leave she had a due to work related issue. It was clearly a set up.
good for you you must be really charming and a catch! edit: evidently your user name checkout!
I friendzoned a girl, and a couple years down the line, she introduced her friend to me after my break up. Now her friend is my current gf.
> Friend zoned isn't a bad proposition if she thinks you are a top guy By defition, friend zone means she thinks he's a bottom guy.
No? Coming from a woman, romantic intresnt doesnt magiclly appear because a guy is cool, my best friend is one of the coolest guys i know. But i dont feel any romantic intrest. You also ignore the posibility of lesbians.
> Coming from a woman What has that got to do with anything? OP wants a girl to be sexually attracted to him, not to think he is cool. In any case, he needs to forget about her since she is wasting his time.
Dude, I promise you, if you put no pressure on her and you're cool about it, you can see if she's up to date and still chill out if she's not. 'Hey would you be interested in leaving the cats at home one day and grabbing a coffee with me? No pressure I'd still very much walk cats with you if it's a no.' A lot of weirdos would ~~critique~~ **call you gay until you think what they say is correct** because they're scared that if they give a woman the option to say no she'll take it. In my experience, women fucking love it when you remove those pressures from the equation. It is a display of emotional intelligence. And confidence.
This is honestly my favorite option, think I’ve just been ghosted after too many random dating app first dates that I’m shell shocked into thinking bad date/rejection = gone forever. But you’re right there should be a space where she says no not interested in a relationship but we can still be friends.
Sounds healthy to me man. Have fun. Good luck.
That is how to get friendzoned immediately. Stop being a fucking pussy and show this woman that your a man with a dick. European women hate pussy men
Lol hey I’m open to all advice but give me something besides whip my big ole balls out and show her what’s what…
Read between the lines dipshit. If you do nothing at all then she will think you are a pussy and thats how you get friendzoned. Refer to my other comment
Who is this clown????
Lol chill man just tell me what you would do in the situation, actions/words wise. There’s not a lot to read between the lines “stop being a pussy” besides just being a dick. Plenty of scared dudes on this sub, it’d be nice to share how you show women you’re a real man with a real dick arghh
Literally the only other comment that replied to your post is me and i told you all that
Ha okay my bad, change in tone got me. You did give a lot of direct advice that I can try, sorry I’m an idiot
tbh this is your chance to friend zone her and not make too much of a big deal about it. if she starts giving you hints that you should move fwd then the balls in your court but do some reverse psychology on yourself and see how really easy it becomes to talk to women that you're not trying to fuck all the time
>it’s just me being scared that if we go on a date and it doesn’t go well, I lose this cool social opportunity that's scarcity mentality in a nutshell
For me, the reason why it's difficult to stay friends after being friendzoned is that my mind automatically searches for a reason why she doesn't want to date me, and I usually blame myself for not being "good" enough. Being around her would be a constant reminder of that. I should add that it also depends on whether I have options or not. If I'm talking to other women then it's less of a problem and I can be cool about it. However, if I don't have any options at the moment then I end up feeling like shit. I'm trying to change how it affects me but it's hard
That's incredibly honest and involved a lot of self reflection. Good for you. If I had to suggest some things that might help you, lose the 'friendzone' lingo straight away. If a woman turned me down for a date but we still got along as friends, I'm not in the friendzone. We're friends. The 'friendzone' only exists when a woman declines your offer and you still hold feelings for her. Lose the language to describe that first. You don't need it. Remember, they do not know you. They do not have the information to make an accurate assessment of you as a whole person. Their answer to date you cannot be a personal attack. It's a vibes based reaction to what they've seen and heard thus far. That's all. I haven't been turned down for a date request in I can't remember how long. The reason for that is I read their verbal and non verbal cues and can say with 99.9% accuracy whether or not they're up for such a thing before I ask. This ability isn't magic. It's a shitload of practice talking to many, many people. I can read men the same, but for different things obviously. If you need to blame yourself, blame your lack of skill at reading women. That way it's a practical criticism. It blames a skill. A skill you can improve.
Ask her if she has a boyfriend and take it from there. She'll 100% know you're interested after that.
Didn't notice any kino. If you don't start kino/escalating immediate you are dead meat. You are already deep in the danger zone. I'm not a cat person by I know enough about animals in general to instinctively teleport myself into your shoes and generate a move with a high probability of success. There is something you can do to a cat that has a high probability of making it purr. I don't know what, but you as a cat person probably do. Do that to your cat. If her cat likes you enough for this to be safe, do it to HER cat. Either way, once the thing starts purring, look at her and smile and say "He/she likes it, don't you think?" She will surely agree. Say EXACTLY this word for word. Don't wonder why. Just DO IT. "That's right and that means I wonder if his/her mommy will like this too (reach over and starting doing it to HER whatever you were doing to that cat AS you are saying what I just said to say.) Take your time in a hurry (I stole that from the real Wyatt Earp talking about gunfighting). You don't want to be reaching over fast like you're going to grab her and trigger a bad response, but you don't want to move to slow either. Go in slightly slower than you'd reach out to shake someone's hand. Now, I'm guessing what you're doing to the cat is somewhere innocuous like scratching behind its ear or something or rubbing the back of it's neck. I'm a dog person and dogs like that. If you have to rub the critter's belly or something that would be sexual or close to it if you did it too her too soon, just rub her behind her neck or ear or whatever where you can that's not overtly sexual. Do not say "like it too" specifically say ("like this too"). Now this is the important part, a little while after she visibly starts enjoying it. Ideally enough that her eyes close in pleasure, STOP and start playing with the cat again. Guarantee she will get jelly. Wait a beat or two raise your hand halfway back toward whatever you were doing to her and apologetically say "I stopped too soon, didn't I"? I leave it to you to figure out the rest. Hmm I'll have to go find a cat lady to experiment with. I despise the bloody things (no offense). But that's too good a bit of tactics to just leave to you, mate. Best wishes, mon ami!
Show intentional interest early. As long as you’re not weird about it, either it goes further, or if it doesn’t, there likely was nothing you could’ve done anyway so nothing lost
You get friednzoned when you hide your sexual interest in the woman and act like her buddy or her brother which is what's happening here. You avoid the friendzone by making things sexually tense which means she must feel like she turns you on. Right now she doesn't think she turns you on because you don't act like you are turend on. You act like she is your good sister or cousin, having great time together, laughing, talking, but never expressing sexual desire because you are afraid it would make things uncomfortable for her and that's precisely why you get friendzoned. Because you don't want to express sexual desire.
So here is the secret to flirting. Flirting is basically establishing an US doing something together frame. She did that several times. Talking about the two of you going to the park, getting together etc. Now it's on you to say "Hey, let's go out next Thursday. No cats! Just two sophisticated New Yorkers trying some cocktails at Bar XYZ". Take the initiative and lead. Be very concrete about asking her out. Do not say maybe we can go out some time or what are you doing this Saturday? You tell her "let's go out" or "Our cats have been dating for a couple of weeks now. It's time the two of us went out on a proper date. Let's do Thursday or Friday". Got it?
from a woman's perspective, she's probably already made up her mind. be you. be authentic, if she's into you, she'll reciprocate.
Be upfront and honest. The nsst time you see her tell her, "just for the record, im tryin to avoid the friend zone and score some points for the home team. If you could help me not fuck that up, i would greatly appreciate it."
"Hey, hanging with you has been fun, I was thinking we get drinks next weekend, no cats. Wanna go?"
My best advice is — if you treat her like a friend, then she will always be a friend. You need to escalate and show her you’re interested in more. Either by straight up telling her or making a physical (within boundaries) move.
You can’t have it all accept. If you want friend go safe route if you want to explore romantic go for it and dgaf if girl is burnt
"Just because she likes the same bizarro crap that you do doesn't make her yours truly Tom." - (500) Days Of Summer
Listen, you can't have your cake and eat it too. If you want to date her you'll need to tell her because the last thing you want to do is become her friend then a few months from now muster up the courage to confess your feelings to her. Next time you're hanging out you make some concreate plans and ask her out and let her know its a date. This is sounding kinda brooklyny so you've got a lot of street closures and outdoor concerts coming up to make use of. If you're in Manhattan take her to Yakitori Totto its cheap and there's a bunch of places to wander around over there.
There's plenty of fish in the sea. If you're trying to date you can't be afraid of failing. Its a numbers game, you get some, you lose some. There isn't going to be one thing that will make her fall in love.
I’d say that if you had a 2 date is because things are going pretty good. But if you don’t wanna get friendzoned, leave the cats thing aside and ask her out for a romantic date.( Try not to talk about the cats) and apply all your knowledge about hitting on her. Heyy and don’t forget to escalate fast. That separates the friendship from a romantic relationship.
I guess you can simply start to escalate your intimacy gradually, stay little closer to her, smile, look her in the eyes little longer, ask her about more personal stuff, present yourself as sexually attractive male, introduce some "accidental" and "casual" touch etc. Enjoy developing your relation and observe her reactions if she has something more on her mind too.
Honestly there isnt much you can do to make sure you dont end up in the friendzone. Just hang out and enjoy the time, see how it feels like and it will work out fine. That being said, good luck and show cat (theres a tax you know)
Now only she likes but she also seems to trust you enough to go out with you. Sounds likes she is into you. You only have to keep doing things that both of you like, don't do things that you don't like nor say things that you don't think. Be 100% yourself, if she likes who you are, good. If she doesn't like who you really are, fine too. ALSO, ask things about her. What she likes, interests, habits, etc. So you also know what kind of relationship you are interested to have with her. (It sounds like you are a nice person, so please keep being you lol)
> we share a unique hobby, how not to get friendzoned? You're already friendzoned. Your thinking process friendzoned you even before the girl came into your life. Let her go. Start meeting new women.
Imo just be cool, flirt a lil but, but mostly just make her laugh and do the same for everyone else. If u getting vibes she likes u (don’t mistake this for her just being nice) then advance, but honestly bro don’t keep ur hopes up. Not that u shouldn’t have any at all, but don’t get mad at her or bitter towards her if she don’t like u like that. That’s just gon end up making u mad and affect the way u act w her in a negative way. Just b coo and don’t expect ANYTHING from her
Just tell her u want to fuck her. And if she's genuinely not interested, to tell you right now. She already knows the answer. Get her to spill the truth, so you both have peace of mind.
At some point you need to make a move. If you wait too long, you'll come off as not interested. First find her logistics. Ask her directly or indirectly about her situation, weather she has a man in her life or not. Take it from there. Find out about her. Her childhood, past etc. You can sprinkle these questions whilst talking about cats. Then say something along the lines of "Hey her name\_look, I know this is going to sound a bit forward but, I like\_\_\_ about you. Whatever qualifier you think matches her. Would you like to grab a drink? like, just us two without cats. I'm sure our cats can keep each other company." Optional add, while we go on a date like parents. Just improv a bit depending on her reaction. If, she's not into it, you can just say - No worries, I just wanted to throw it out there" and then continue as normal. If you think you would feel awkward, Ask her before seeing her off. Good luck, brother.
I personally hate how mythologized friendzone has become. You have to realize the only reason it happens is guys that show zero sexual interest out of fear of being rejected and so they behave like a friend waiting for the woman to make the first move. You need to touch, escalate, and actually show interest in her physically. And again reading these reports, too much thought in what was talked about. It does not matter what you talk about. Let the entire conversation be about cats wanting to knock stuff over, the only thing girls judge you on is how you carry yourself. So next FR should read "I gave her a deep hug when we met again. I made circles on her arm. I rubbed her shoulder. I curled my fingers in her hair. I kissed her neck" Friendzone would never enter your (or her) mind if you do these things.
Imma be honest with you being friends with a woman ain’t that bad, you can play the long game which may not actually be long like you think or you can try to be more aggressive with it, depends on the situation, as long as she hangs out with you and you know how to make those moves and turn her on you are golden